铀?[Spike humming a song] 铀?Dialogue: 0,0:00:15.20,0:00:17.12,Bigger,,0,0,0,,铀?Spike is great... 铀?Dialogue: 0,0:00:17.32,0:00:19.62,Bigger,,0,0,0,,铀?Makin' a jewel cake... 铀?Dialogue: 0,0:00:20.70,0:00:21.91,Bigger,,0,0,0,,-Hoo, hooo, hoo?
-Me, that's who.
铀?Been savin' up my gems, so fine 铀?Dialogue: 0,0:00:26.17,0:00:28.09,Bigger,,0,0,0,,铀?For a cake that is divine 铀?Dialogue: 0,0:00:28.09,0:00:30.09,Bigger,,0,0,0,,-Hoo, hoo hoo hooo
-Who are you hooing at?
-Hoo, hoo!
-I know, they're delicious!
Now you see 'em...
...now, you don't!
[belches] Mmm...
铀?This is how you make a jewel cake 铀?Dialogue: 0,0:00:47.10,0:00:49.86,Bigger,,0,0,0,,铀?Stir in some gems, and then you bake 铀?Dialogue: 0,0:00:51.07,0:00:51.86,Bigger,,0,0,0,,Mm-mmm!
铀?Gonna eat, eat, eat it up 铀?Dialogue: 0,0:00:53.86,0:00:54.70,Bigger,,0,0,0,,铀?Gonna...
[Gasps]
What happened to all my jewels?!
I had a bowl full of 'em here...
and now I don't! Which means...
Somebody took 'em.
-Hoo, hoo-ooo, hoo.
-Who?! That's what I'm asking! Who?
Who took my jewels?!
...Oh...
I'm who!
This cake was gonna be so good!
Why?
Why?!?
WHYYY?!?
-Hoo...
-I have no jewels... 铀?Dialogue: 0,0:01:39.87,0:01:42.08,Bigger,,0,0,0,,铀?I have no cake... 铀?Dialogue: 0,0:01:42.08,0:01:44.45,Bigger,,0,0,0,,铀?I'm a sad little dragon... 铀?Dialogue: 0,0:01:44.45,0:01:46.37,Bigger,,0,0,0,,铀?With nothing to...
-[knocking] -Hoo?
-...is it?
-Oh!
Oh, goodness, I...
I hope I'm not interrupting anything.
-Well...I do have this cake to not bake.
-Oh... sorry!
It's a bad time...
-Uh, inside joke. Talk to me.
-It's just that...
Princess Cadence needs us to do a great job
welcoming the Head of the Equestria Games when she visits the Crystal Empire tomorrow-
-Oh, I know all about that.
As if I wouldn't be any help at welcoming...
-Oh... I don't know what I was thinking...
Of course you might be upset for not being invited, and...
here I am coming to ask you for a favor.
You were probably going to say no anyway.
All I had to offer you in exchange was one little jewel.
-What was that? -[screams]
All I have is this jewel.
-That's a really big one...
A really big, juicy, perfect-for-a-cake-topper jewel.
-Does this mean you'll do it?
-[dreamily] Yeah... Sure...
-Oh! Thank you, thank you!
So, while I'm gone, you'll take care of Angel
and tomorrow is Tuesday which is his tail-fluffing day,
and it's really important for him to look good.
-Wait... What?
You want me to take care of him?
-[blows raspberry]
-Oh... Well... Yes.
But if it's too much trouble, I could always see if there's somepony else...
-Uh...
We already agreed on the whole jewel thing,
so I'll just...
-Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Angel, aren't you just so excited?
-[squeaks, whimpers]
-See you tomorrow!
-[Angel blows raspberry]
-Ya know...
She's not the only pony with a pet that might need some watchin'.
[Spike] All I'm saying is...
If Fluttershy thought that her beloved little friend
shouldn't be left alone while you're busy in the Crystal Empire,
then, maybe that's just something to think about.
-Heh!
Tank's not some fuzzy little bunny.
He can take care of himself!
[thud...thud...thud]
[thud]
He's a strong, fearless, and totally together pet.
[crash]
[Rainbow Dash groans]
[crash]
-[whistles random notes]
-Alright. You can watch him, but
only because... uh...
Tank's got a strict flying regiment,
and, and... And someone needs to make sure
that he doesn't slack off while I'm gone.
-Ohhh, heh!
-Y'know...
The two of us are very diligent.
-[quietly] Okay. Whatever.
-Yes, yes. More importantly...
As for Opal, she likes to eat every thirty six and a half minutes...
You groom her with her silken brush, head to toe...
...and don't forget to pooch her pillow out in the middle, that's where she likes it.
And the temperature in the room should always be exactly eighty one point four degrees.
-[smack]
-That's the only way she can get to sleep.
-[purrs]
-And, um...
...Oh. Good!
So, thanks for your help, and good luck to you.
-Ahem...
I think the dragon was expecting a little something for his efforts.
-Almost as beautiful as the pony who gave it to me...
-Shouldn't you be critter-proofing the library or something?
Tank has a tendency to-
[crash] [cat yowls]
-Critterproofing... Yeah...
I'll get right on that.
Heh heh heh... Three down, three to go.
What's that you said, Gummy?
Uh huh...
Well, you're just gonna have to ask Pinkie Pie about that one.
-Ask me! Ask me!
-Go ahead, ask her.
-Of course you can have another cupcake!
Mmm. Mmhmm.
Yeah? Why didn't you say so?
I'll get you a bigger pond immediately.
-I think what Gummy's trying to say is-
- He's always wanted a pair of riding pants?
His toenails need a new coat of shellack?
He wants to floss twice a day instead of just once!
[giggles]
-I think what Gummy's trying to say
is that he'd like a little Spike time.
-Who wouldn't?
Spike time is the best!
-Alas. It doesn't come cheap.
-All I'm saying is you might wanna think about a helmet.
You only want to get hit in the head by a flying turtle...
...once.
-A thousand plus carats of pure deliciousness...
-Looks like you got a regular pet day care in here, Spike.
You'll still be able to get some good play time with Winona like you said though, won't ya?
She tends to get a little wild if she doesn't get her exercise.
-Exercise. Sure, of course.
-I don't remember seeing critters on the invite list.
-That's 'cause we're leavin' them here with Spike.
He's gonna do a little critter-sittin' for us.
-Oh, really?
[bonk]
-So sorry I'm late. Silly bunny had hidden his brush.
Be sure you get plenty on his tail, or it won't get as poofy as he likes it.
Come on, girls, or we're gonna miss the train.
One more for the road?
Oh, you little puppy-wuppy, come on here, hohoho!
-No, I love you more.
-No, I love you more!!
-I LOVE YOU MORE!!!
-Oh...I promise it'll be okay.
I'll fluff your tail twice next week.
Three times?
-Oh, I know! It's a chilly 81.2 in here.
Spike! Take care of this, would you please?
-You got it.
So, uhh... What are you thinking about that hooting little friend of yours?
Suppose you want me to keep an eye on him too.
-That would be nice...
You sure you don't already have your hands full?
-Nah, pshaw. I'll be fine.
But, ah... just between you and me...
I gotta give priority to the paying customers.
-[sighs]
You absolutely sure you can do this?
-Of course. Wouldn't have agreed to it if I couldn't.
Piece of cake!
Speaking of cake, I got a little something I need to attend to.
-Yeah, like keeping an eye on a house full of critters.
-Uh, yeah, uh, that was totally what I was talking about.
Relax. Go to your welcoming thing in the Crystal Empire.
Spike's got it all under control.
Alright! Sidekicks!
Front and center!
There are six of you...
but there's only one right here in front of me...
Two!
And what I say, goes!
-Hoo.
-Spike, the boss of you, that's who!
One, two, three!
Rrrgh. Come on, number 4!
One, two, three, four, five...
Argh... Who's missing?
Angel.
[bonk]
All I wanted were some jewels.
Big, juicy, delicious jewels.
Now what do I have?
A missing rabbit, and-
-[whimpers]
[barks]
-Awww!
Little fluffy angel bunnykins!
You're sooo cute!
The natural weaves in his fluff are to die for!
-Ahem.
-Isn't Angel just the cutest thing you've ever seen?!
[blows raspberry]
-Look. You don't wanna be with me.
I'd rather not chase you around all over the place
when I could be enjoying some jewel cake.
Watch me solve both of our problems.
Ya know...
I'm supposed to be watching him,
but you all have just hit it off so well that,
Maybe... maybe,
I could let you take care of him instead.
-We would, but we've got some major Crusaders business planned for today!
-Major.
We're getting our skydiving cutie marks today!
-Ha! -Yeah!
-Well, I suppose, if you've got other plans...
It's just, you're so good with him, like...
get a cutie mark for bunny-sitting good...
-A bunny-sitting cutie mark...
-That would be adorable!
-He does seem to like us.
-And we haven't exactly figured out
how we're gonna pull off this whole skydivin' thing...
-You know what?
As hard as it's gonna be for me part with these little guys,
I think you should probably just take all of them.
If you ask me,
the more critters you take care of,
the more chances you have of getting some kind of critter-sitting cutie mark.
Am I right, or am I right?
-Sure!
-[whispers] Yes!
-But wait!
How're we gonna take good care of them
without treats for when they're good?
-And we'll need beds for when they're tired!
-And toys! They need toys!
-It's an afternoon.
They don't need all that stuff, they'll be fine.
-We need to be able to buy them some things!
One jewel might be able to cover it all.
-Uh... what would I possibly be doing with jewels?
-I happen to know for a fact that
Applejack gave you a gem to watch Winona,
which means...
-Obviously, no one around here
is getting a cutie mark for kindness toward a poor, hungry little dragon.
Take it or leave it.
-We'll take it!
-铀?Gonna put in some flour, and add a little sugar 铀?Dialogue: 0,0:12:08.24,0:12:10.95,Bigger,,0,0,0,,铀?for my five de-lic-ious jewels! 铀?Dialogue: 0,0:12:11.46,0:12:14.96,Bigger,,0,0,0,,-But pink feathers would look so good with your eyes...
-Meh. That bird could use a little color.
-Has anyone seen Tank's head? Where's his head?!
-What have you done to the turtle?!
-Ohhh. I totally forgot he could do that. Heh...
-Yeah... So...
Pretty sure critter-sittin' cutie marks are out.
-And our critter-grooming cutie marks probably aren't going to appear anytime soon either.
-Hoo...
-Ugh...
Alright. Load 'em up.
And you can give me back that jewel I gave you.
-Sorry... We don't have it anymore.
-What?! Why not?
-How do you think we paid for the industrial-sized pet hair drier?
-Ohh...
-Zecora knows just what to do
about all this bad mojo that's floating around you.
-I'm thinking a cage with a great big lock might be next.
-Zecora can take the bad away
if you do just what I say.
-Really?
-But before I can do my duty,
I'm going to need some of your booty.
-Uggh.
Where you goin'?
-You think jewels are what you need,
but there's no worse mojo than dragon greed.
-[laughing]
-[stomach growls]
Almost there...
-Mmmmhmmm...?
-Just taking good care of everyone's animals.
What am I gonna have to do to get this to go away?!
[Sigh]
Now this is just between you and me, right?
No other pony has to hear a word about it?
-Eh, a word about what, now?
-This better be important.
-All aboard!
-Angel.
-I can't have all of these animals on my train.
Not without tickets, and not without chaperones.
-All I need is to get on for one minute, grab a bunny and get off!
Promise!
-Ahaha, likely story.
No chaperone, no train!
-[giggling]
-A skydiving cutie mark!
Is three ponies enough?
-sigh-
At least I have you two left, my delectable little treasures.
[Conductor] All aboard...
...for the Crystal Empire!
-Crystal Empire?!
I've always wanted to see the Crystal Empire!
I wish I were dressed for it, but still!
[squeals] THE CRYSTAL EMPIRE!
-We're not really going!
We just needed to get on the train so I can get that rabbit!
And when I do, we're off!
-What?!
-It's not fair!
-[blows raspberry]
-There he is!
[Conductor] Next stop, the Crystal Empire! [steam from brake release, train whistle blows]
-No, no no no no no NO!
[Applebloom] So it seems like the Crystal Empire would be really cold,
but I've heard that it's not! It's as warm as can be!
- Do you think the walls are crystal? [gasps] Maybe even see-through!
Can you imagine see-through walls?
[gasp]
[crash]
[Meow!]
Take it. Just take it!
So...beautiful!
-Well, enjoy it while you can, 'cause we're not getting out of this car until we're back in Ponyville!
-There is no way, no how, we're comin' all the way to the Crystal Empire without lookin' around!
- Nopony's gonna get past THIS dragon!
-Don't make me use this!
-You wouldn't dare!
[laughs]
[knock knock]
[Spike still laughing]
Oh no!
[gasp]
-Whoa. Just whoa.
-[giggles]
-[squeals] I'm in crystal heaven!
-Shhh! They're right there!
There's the bunny!
Please, please, pretty please, don't go down there!
I'll fluff your tail!
I'll perm, highlight, and blow it out if you'll just STOP!
-[blows raspberry]
-What do you want?! Name it, and it's yours!
[Spike panting]
Awwh...
[Mwah!]
Huah!
[gasp]
-Oh my goodness!
-[Conductor] All aboard!
-You're coming with me!
[Angel crying]
-We made it!
-Without seeing the palace...
-[Twilight Sparkle] I think this car is empty...
-They're coming this way!
Everybody down!
-There has to be a better solution!
-Shh!
Ohh, don't sit down, don't sit down!
[Applejack] Hoo-whee! My dogs are barkin'.
[Winona barks]
-Did y'all hear that? They really are!
-[Rainbow Dash] Huh, bummer Spike had to miss out on all this. He woulda' had fun here.
-[Twilight Sparkle] I'm sure he's having a great time watching all the critters back at home.
-[Applejack] Think he's still got a handle on things?
-If he's staying calm and collected, I bet he's doing a terrific job as a leader.
Go ahead, bunny. Do your worst. I deserve it.
I ignored you, tried to pawn you off on someone else, I didn't take these silly things out, or fluff this like I was supposed to.
I wasn't really thinking about you at all. Any of you. Just wanted the jewels.
I hope you'll all forgive me someday.
You will?
[stomach growls]
Oh, great. I'M gonna be the one who gives us away.
Where did you...? [stomach growls again]
-[Applejack] You all year that?
[stomach stops growling]
I can't wait to scratch the belly on Winona. Oh, I miss her.
-[Twilight Sparkle] I can't wait to see Owlowiscious! [giggles]
-[Spike] Hello!
Thought we'd meet you at the station!
-So we could hear all about the Crystal Empire, and find out if you brought us one of the crystal snowglobes that they sell at the train station!
-How did you know about the snow globes?
-Um...
Lucky guess?
-I've got to hand it to you, Spike.
you did a really good job of taking care of the animals.
-Oh, Spike, Angel looks perfect! You did such a good job fluffing his tail.
-Yeah, well... we're like this now.
-Hoo-oo!
-You know who.
Hoo-oo!
-So, what are you thinking?
Bake 'em into a jewel pie?
Ooh, six-layer gem cake sounds pretty good!
-Yeah, it does.
It really, really does.
WHYYYYYYYY?!?
[Winona howls]
Captions by Hypatian ~ Please repost and distribute freely