uh we read from one
written question the the areas of
the past of course a lot of suffering
and are very difficult to liberate
my errors i've created in the past quite
a heavy burden
how can i forgive myself for this pain
that i caused
and how to be sure that i have forgiven
others
what can i do if i offer forgiveness and
reconciliation
again and again to others but the other
ones other people don't respond
positively and to keep the door closed
this is a very good question
uh first of all you can learn
everyone can learn from the from
from their own mistakes
and skillfulness and all of us
are unskillful at times
even the buddha as a teacher he was
unskillful at times
and he learned from his unskillfulness
so first of all we we should we should
remain remember that we are a human
being
and we can be
and then the practice of mindfulness can
always transform
even transform the past
you think the path is already gone and
you can not do anything
concerning the past but that is not true
you can change the past because the past
is still there
in in the present the wound of the past
is still there in the present moment and
you can touch it
suppose in the past you have said
something
unkind to your grandma
and now you regret and your grandma
is no longer there for you to say sorry
and you have that complex of youth
following you all the time
but according to this practice you can
do
you breathe in and out mindfully and you
recognize that your grandma
is still alive in every cell of your
body you continue your grandma
that is the truth the genes of your
grandma
are in you
your grandma has not
really died she continues in
so having seen your grandma in
in you you begin to say grandma i am
i was not skillful i promise you that
from now on i will never say something
like like that again
and if you are sincere mindful
determined and then you can see your
grandma and you smiling
and you are healed you are healed
so you can transform the past
you make an aspiration a strong
aspiration that from now on you will not
say
things like that anymore you will not do
things like that anymore
and that is a powerful energy
that can transform even the past and you
feel
lighter later
during the vietnam war there was a
american soldier
who killed five children in vietnam
his unit was
destroyed by the guerrillas so he was
very angry and he came back to that
village
looking the way to retaliate
so he brought with him a bag of sandwich
and he put explosive in a sandwich
and he left on the gate of the
and he left on the gate of the and he hide himself and he saw five
and he hide himself and he saw five
children coming
out coming out and enjoy eating the
sandwiches
after that the children showed
a sign of sickness and they cry
they yell and their mothers came out and
tried to help
but the soldier knew that nothing can be
done
because the village is so far from a
city
and he saw the 509
in the arms of their mothers
and the soldier survived the war
and went back to america
and he couldn't no longer sleep
every time he found himself with
a few children in the same room he could
not stand it he had to run out of the
room
and he could not share the story with
anyone
until one day
we offer a retreat for war veterans
in california and he came
and after four days of practices
he got enough trust
and during the sharing
he told us the story trying a lot
and i was in a group
and i promised to give him a
consultation
and i told him daniel
you have killed five children that is
the truth
and you suffer but now there are other
children who are dying
in africa asia many countries
and even in america children are dying
they are poor people there are people
there are children who only need one
public medicine
in order for their life to be saved
thousands thousands of children like
that are dying over the world
and if you make the aspiration to go to
them
and then every day you can save five
children
you don't have to
to lie down in the corner of the past
and suffer like that
if in the past you have p5 and today you
can save five
and if you can save five to date five
tomorrow
and then you can see the five you guilt
begin to smile
in you and you are healed
so he follow that instructions
and i can saw the transformation and
healing
taking place right during that time he
listened to the advice
because during the time he listened to
me
he made that vow i will go out
and try to save children i am young
enough
to do the work and that tremendous
amount of energy
given him by the aspiration begins to
heal him
right away
and after that he practiced helping
children in the world
to survive
and he was healed
he married a dentist in
england and led a normal life
and this is a real story
so the fact is that you are
you you can liberate yourself from the
past
from the prison of the
from the prison of the you can make a strong determination
you can make a strong determination
strong aspiration to go and help
help the people who are abused have the
people who are victims of
sexual abuse and so on
and then you can heal yourself
that is the power of aspiration the
fourth
nutrimental volition
and if you have transformation and
healing in you
you become a pleasant person
you are full of compassion understanding
and your your presence is a very
very fresh very pleasant for other
people
if you propose to him or to her
the practice of reconciliation and if
the other person refused to do
because you are not fresh enough you
have not healed yourself enough
you have to to show yourself as someone
who
who has a transform who has healed
himself
or herself
and the healing in you will help
start the healing in the other person
there are many ways
you can write him or her a letter
of love you can ask a friend
to talk to him or to her on your behalf
there are many ways to do it
and if you are already you have already
reconciled with yourself
renew yourself become a new person
and then transforming him reconciling
with him
become much easier if you find it
still difficult to to invite that
the other person to reconcile because
you have not started
the process of reconciliation from
within
if you have and then you have heal
yourself
and then it would be much easier to
to help him to reconcile
with himself and with you
you