You always have to have the last word, don't you?
No.
Let me just be clear, when I say this.
When this plane lands, we're done, and I mean done.
Fine. I'm sure we'll all find a way
to get on with your replacement.
Replacement?
Lady, you are in for a major disappointment
if you think somebody can just waltz in
and replace me and my crew.
Firstly, there are a thousand ex-thugs who can kick in doors
and jump out of burning buildings
just the same as you.
You'll be replaced within a week.
Oh, and secondly
"your crew" won't need replacing.
Winston's staying with me.
Yeah. Good luck selling him on that one.
I don't have to sell him on anything.
He signed a contract.
[airplane whirring]
[high-pitched whirring]
[beeping]
Contract?
- I didn't sign a contract. - He did.
[explosion]
[intense music]
Yeah, well, there was some sort of explosion.
'We've lost engine number one and engine number two.'
We're losing altitude rapidly.
'I'm assuming it was a bird strike'
or perhaps multiple birds.
Did you hear that impact? That wasn't a bird strike.
- That was a missile. - A missile?
Why would somebody shoot a missile at us?
I think motive is a question best saved for later.
What's our rate of descent? 3,010 feet per minute.
Is this your emergency checklist?
Yes. Why?
What the hell are you doing?
Nothing a thousand other thugs
couldn't be doing right now. Go strap in.
This man is a professional pilot.
In my opinion, he's in over his head.
I'm not interested in your opinion.
There is nothing in the emergency manual
about surface-to-air-missile hits.
'And by the time he figures that out'
this is going to be over with.
Now, I recommend you go in the back, fasten your seat belt
unless you'd like to end up as a hood ornament
when we hit the ground.
Can we agree, if we end up having to eat each other
down there, that she goes up first?
- We're losing our hydraulics. - I know.
We won't be able to lower the landing gear.
It might not make a difference.
Alright, just up ahead.
Just past those trees up there, there's a flat area.
Are we gonna make it that far?
We're gonna find out.
Here we go.
[crashing]
[elevator bell dings]
I'm not gonna predict anything.
- Dude, I'm just sayin'. - I ain't gonna do it.
Why don't you just answer the question?
Bec.. Because there are a thousand fortune-tellers
in San Francisco, and I ain't one of 'em.
Dude, I'm not askin' you to look into a crystal ball.
I'm askin' you to lay odds.
Three-to-one, Chance changes his mind?
Five-to-one? What?
How many times I got to tell you?
The last time I talked to the guy
he said he's splitting with Ilsa.
'That's it.'
That's all I know. That's all you know.
What is the point in trying to figure out
whether or not a guy is gonna change his mind?
Where the hell are you going?
- The roof. - For what?
You asked me to write up the after-action report on the job.
I'm going to go and do it.
On the roof?
Well, I tried to do it on the cab ride over.
But what, with you two bickering the whole way
I couldn't hear myself think.
And as you're still at it
I'm gonna go and do it on the roof, okay?
[elevator bell dings]
Ten-to-one? It's got to be at least that, right?
You know what? I'll give you $1,000 if you quit asking me..
- Oh, God! - Hey, guys.
[gun cartridge clicks] We're closed.
Hey, I don't want to take up too much
of your time or nothing, but, um, I'm looking for Chance.
It's kind of urgent.
Do you know where I can find him?
Yeah, in the sky, Harry.
- We're closed. - Ha ha..
Sense a little hostility.
Can't get anything past you, can we?
Hey, whoa, how do you guys know I'm not here to do you a favor?
I've done Chance plenty of favors.
Uh, no. You've offered to do us favors.
But what you've actually done is drag us into more problems
than any ten people I know.
Okay.
You're the only private Detective who manages to, uh
create more problems than he solves.
Thank you.
[sighs] What do you want, Harry?
Well, it's.. It's a little complicated.
[chuckles]
You sure Chance is unreachable?
- What did I just say? - What did he just say?
Chance has been delayed, alright?
Okay.
Not only is he not here now
he won't be here for hours.
Till he is here, we're closed for business.
So whatever most recent mess
you've managed to get yourself into
you're gonna have to wait until tomorrow
to guilt Chance into helping you out.
Okay. Okay, got it.
[chuckles] Got it.
It's just the thing is..
I'm pretty sure I'm going to be dead by tomorrow.
[intense music]
[theme music]
[music continues]
Are you okay? Can you move?
Yeah, I think so.
The pilot's dead. We've got to find a way out.
[grunts]
Is that.. Is that smell what I think it is?
If it's leaking jet fuel, then, yes.
[grunting]
We've got to get out of here.
[grunts] Not that way.
Well, what do we do?
Oh, so now you're interested in my opinion.
Stay here.
What are the chances the flames
don't ignite the leaking fuel?
Not very good.
I got an idea.
What are you doing?
[gas hissing]
Alright, alright, I-I see what you're doing
and I am going to have to object.
Do whatever you want, but get behind some cover.
- Exactly. Exactly my point! - Get back! Get down!
What good is it if the door opens or not?
We're gonna be torn to shreds by shrapnel!
Come on.
[intense music]
Doesn't look that bad. You first.
[coughing]
Ah. Ow.
Come on. Give me your hand.
This plane can blow at any second.
[explosion]
What happened?
Anti-aircraft missile, probably shoulder-launched.
Who would do that?
I don't really care who right now.
We need some transportation out of here, or we die.
Let's start walking.
Ow.
[instrumental music]
(Harry) 'So this woman hires me, okay?'
She's the wife of some, I don't know, Armenian mob guy.
She wants to know if her husband's cheating on her.
I dig into it, turns out he is.
I go to tell her about it, she turns on me.
She tells her husband
that she's been having an affair with me.
What? He flips out, wants me dead
and sends, like, 12 thugs after me.
I mean, can you..
Can you believe that could happen to somebody?
To you? Yes, absolutely.
Look, I've had my bad luck, but it's not...
(Winston) 'Harry, why don't you just'
go to the cops? Why come to us?
The cops? Come on, my clientele doesn't want a guy
who's going to go to the cops every time he gets nervous.
It's bad for business. And for what it's worth
I have helped out Chance on a number of occasions
where he didn't want to go to the cops
and he always said to me...
"Whenever you need something, Harry
all you got to do is call." Yeah, we know.
Say, Harry..
How is it that you know
there are a dozen thugs after you?
How do I know?
I spotted them in my apartment. They're at my office.
Every time I turn around, they're there.
Couldn't it be they, uh, tailed you here, could it?
Oh, come on. Tailed me? Me? Ha ha ha..
Come on. I know what you guys think of me
but I'm a professional.
I'm just like you. I'm careful. I'm alert.
If someone was following me, trust me, I'd know about it.
Damn it, Harry.
Oh, God.
(Winston) 'Okay, I got six'
eight, ten, twelve guys..
All with automatic gear.
Great. This is just great.
Alright, let's get him out of here.
Well, it's too late for that. They got the exits covered.
So we'll just shoot our way out.
Twelve guys with twelve automatic rifles..
Really?
Alright, here's what we're gonna do.
I'm gonna lock down the rear and the side exits.
You turn on all the alarms, get the surveillance up and running
and call Ames.
Tell her to get her ass down here right now!
- Dude. - What?
You're yellin'.
[softly] Sorry, it's just that this guy
while he might be a world-class dimwit
but he's a friend of Chance's
and Chance isn't here right now
which leaves it to you and me to protect him.
And since Chance isn't here right now
well, that leaves it to me to call the shots.
And if you don't like that
well, there's the door!
There's the door, huh? Is that how we're gonna do this?
(Harry) Wow... Wow.
I didn't know Winston cared that much about me.
It's not about you. It's about Bangkok.
Bangkok? What happened in Bangkok?
- Harry? - Yeah?
- Get away from me. - Okay. Yeah.
(Guerrero) 'Thanks a lot, Chance.'
You should let me take a look at that.
It's fine. Can we keep walking?
It'll take me two minutes.
I can handle it. Stop trying to save me.
Why are we walking uphill?
Shouldn't we be walking downhill towards a waterway?
Why would we want to do that?
[sighs] Because water leads to civilization
civilization to transportation.
Surely you don't need me to tell you that.
Well, first of all, smugglers and drug runners
use the waterways.. Not a great place to hitchhike.
Secondly, I saw a supply road from the air.
Maybe we can spot it from up here.
Trust me. This isn't a place for someone like you.
Excuse me? Someone like me?
Yeah. You know, someone who's major survival instinct
is to find a willing billionaire and marry him.
Am I right?
Oh, I saw that, too.
[dramatic music]
[door creaks]
Drugs..
'Small-time operation.'
- Is it working? - Transmitter's shot.
Maybe I can get it to receive.
Lock into a signal from that village I saw
'see what direction it's in.'
[gasps]
Well, there's our drug runner.
Hey, there, fella.
Oh, my God. You're stealing from it.
Well, he'd probably want us to have it.
♪ Can't get you out of my head ♪
♪ Thinking about you while I'm lying in bed ♪
[cell phone ringing]
♪ And got me misbehaving ♪
♪ And all I want to do ♪
♪ Is scream your name out ♪
♪ I want your desire ♪
♪ I want.. ♪
[line trilling]
[cell phone beeps] Damn it, Ames!
Winston, what happened in Bangkok
that's making you so cranky?
Dude, no.
Bangkok?
What do you know about...?
Wait a second.
So you think I'm cranky now because of Bangkok?
I wasn't cranky about Bangkok.
I wasn't, at least, not until now.
- You told him? - Sorry.
Bangkok?
Why would you discuss Bangkok
with him of all people?
'You know what kind of a big mouth this guy is?'
You know what? Every time we work without Chance
you act like this.
It's getting a little old.
Did you shut down the freight elevator?
You said you were locking everything down in the back.
I said get the alarms
and the electronics locked down.
The freight elevator controls are with them!
Freight elevator is in the back.
Can't we just shut it down now?
(Both) No!
They got control of it now.
Good.
[speaking foreign language]
[torch crackling]
Will that hold 'em?
Not for long. We need to set up a barricade.
Come on.
What are you staring at?
9-millimeter slugs.
Where'd you get those?
I have no idea.
'I'm just a trophy wife'
whose only survival instinct was to marry a billionaire.
Okay, could you cut me some slack?
- I'm trying to be nice here. - Don't bother.
You and I are not friends.
All I expect from you is that you help me
get out of this situation and then we go our separate ways.
What, you're actually gonna let me have the last word?
Get down.
[gunfire]
Stay down.
[gunfire]
Not yet.
[gunfire]
Now.
[gun clicks]
[gunfire]
[instrumental music]
[speaking foreign language]
So about this Bangkok thing...
Harry, I got a theory
as to why you're always gettin' yourself into trouble.
'Cause I ask too many questions?
I can't help it. I just.. I just need to know.
I really need to know.
This guy.
Alright.
So we take this job in Bangkok a few years back.
- Yeah. - Chance is with the protectee.
Me and Guerrero, we get caught.
They cuff us.. They blindfold us
throw us in the back of a car..
Somehow Guerrero manages
to get himself free, take out the driver
and get us out of there.
Guerrero saved your life?
Yeah, and ever since then
whenever we ain't working with Chance.
Oh, you should see him. He just sits there just..
Always so superior..
Just judging me.
Really? It didn't seem like he was judging you back...
- Oh, he's judgin'. - You sure?
Because I'm pretty observant about this kind of stuff.
- Harry. - Yeah.
Shut it.
What are you guys doing? Relaxing?
- Dude, we got a problem. - Just one?
Uh, yeah, one particular.
That.
- 'Oh, crap.' - 'What the...?'
Oh, God.
Alright, dude.
There's only four in this elevator.
But there's four more by the front exit.
There's three on the east stairwell.
- There's one on the west. - Too many.
We take out these guys quick enough on the elevator
keep them from lettin' their buddies in.
No way. They got way too much firepower.
I mean, look, maybe we can hold our own
but at the very least
they're gonna keep us pinned down.
And then once they.. Once they unblock these outer doors
we're gonna get overrun.
Yeah.
Damn it, don't argue with me about this!
If we try to go toe-to-toe with these guys...
I'm agreeing with you, dummy.
We gotta fall back.
Yeah.
- Yeah. - Yeah.
Where are we going? Where are we going?
To a safe room, unless you'd rather be dead.
Would you come on?
(Ilsa) 'Hector Lopez?'
- Are you sure? - Pretty sure.
But why would he do that?
Well, I killed his brother.
What, that's it? Simple revenge?
Revenge's a perfectly acceptable reason to commit murder.
Yeah, but I thought you people didn't take those sorts
of things personally when on the job.
Oh, "you people"?
Assassins.
Yeah, well, that's a human being out there.
And if you prick him, does he not...?
Whatever.
- He's gonna wait. - Wait for what?
Till it's dark, so he can close
the distance on us without being spotted.
How can you be sure?
It's what I would do if I were in his spot.
He's angry.
He's good, but he knows not to push a bad situation.
So he's gonna wait.
'He's just sittin' out there thinkin' about his brother..'
and how it might feel just a little bit better
if he can watch me die.
Like I said, he's human like the rest of us.
Don't move.
This?
- What, are you crazy? - It's just a spider.
Yeah, a bana spider...
One of the most deadly spiders in the world.
One bite is lethal.
God, it's probably how this guy died.
When you get stung by one of these things..
Your lungs.. They collapse.
He probably sat down, gasped for air
then he just died.
He looks like he died in the '80s.
I doubt that fella's been around that long.
No.
- But the nest has. - What?
God, this whole place is a nest.
Come on, Harry, move.
(Guerrero) Let's barricade the door.
Come on. Come on. Come on.
[cell phone ringing]
- Hey. Guess who. - Great.
Hello.
Hey, is everything cool down there?
I just saw a bunch of guys with huge guns
parked in the alley.
Yeah. Yeah. Everything's cool.
Where the hell have you been?
Right here.
Okay, look, I may have fallen asleep
for, like, five minutes.
But it's not like I...
We're barricaded in the utility room
with a client, and, um, there's about a dozen guys
outside the door that want him dead.
If your nap's over
'and you're not too tired'
'you think maybe you could come down and'
I don't know, maybe help us figure a way out of this?
[pounding on door]
[man shouting]
I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess that
you don't speak Armenian.
[sighs] There's more of them.
(Chance) It's only gonna get worse.
They're nocturnal. Great.
Might've figured this out, though.
It's working?
Receiver's a little weak. I just need to find a place
to get a better signal.. Maybe on the roof.
Can't we just make a break for it when it gets dark?
Oh, just go wandering around out there?
He'll have the advantage. I wanna know exactly where
we're going. The fastest way to figure that out
is with the radio. I'm gonna go up on the roof
see if I can boost the antenna, get a better signal.
Listen, in the meantime, here's this.
There's two rounds left.
Make the first one count.
Can you handle that?
Hurry up.
[distant crack]
[wood creaking]
[footsteps approaching]
[gunfire]
Where is he?
[grunting]
Aah! My eyes!
Unh! Oof!
[Chance coughing]
Oof! Unh!
- I can't see. - Give me your hand.
We've got to get out of here. Give me your hand.
[intense music]
Alright, what do you see?
Okay, there's one big, ugly guy blocking the stairwell.
Ain't no way I'm getting past him.
Yeah, well, you wouldn't be stuck up there
'if you'd answered your damn phone the first three times'
we called you.
You know what? This is easy.
I mean, let's just call the police.
Hello? Isn't that what I pay taxes for?
Says the girl who's been payin' taxes for three weeks.
'Listen, we can't call the cops.'
- Why not? - Becau..
Because we promised Harry we wouldn't. That's why.
He asked for our help. We're gonna fix this for him.
God, is he always this cranky during a job?
Hello.
Alright, don't want to talk. I get it.
[gas hissing]
Maybe if you let him off the hook about Bangkok..
By telling him how thankful I am for what he did for me?
Dude, I'm not gonna feed his ego like that.
- No way. - What he did for you?
You stupid or somethin'?
- Anybody hear that? - What?
Shh.
[gas hissing]
Is that what I think it is?
Yeah. Okay. That's gas.
- I'm sorry. - Apology accepted.
What part are you sorry about?
I had a clean shot at him in the cabin
and I didn't take it.
Oh, that's no reason to apologize.
You were hurt.
Well, it's not a trip to South America
until you've been partially blinded
by drug-refining chemicals.
Look, you never killed anybody, right?
That's a fair assumption?
Well, so far, so good.
Let's just try to keep it that way, okay?
What is it with you?
What do you mean what is it with me?
A few hours ago
you were probably considering throwing me out of that plane.
And yet now you're putting yourself
in all sorts of danger just to prevent me
from having an experience
you fear might be unpleasant for me.
Oh, unpleasant.
Understand, I am not belittling
the seriousness of taking a life.
But in these circumstances, I could hardly be blamed...
It's got nothing to do with blame. A life is a life.
You take one, and a part of you is gone.
- But you've... - Somebody's gotta do what I do.
It doesn't mean it's easy.
And the first time..
Trust me, it's something you never want to experience.
[intense music]
Are we sure this is the right direction?
(Chase) 'The signal was definitely this way.'
'Probably only a few more miles.'
I certainly hope you're right.
If we have to turn back around now
we could be in serious trouble.
[grunting]
Gracias, senorita.
No!
Oh!
[groaning]
Aah!
Not bad for a blind guy.
[instrumental music]
[gas hissing]
[coughs] It should be in the panel there.
There's a master shut-off switch.
[coughs] There should be a-a blue hose with a nozzle.
Okay. Okay, uh, um, t-there's... There's two blue hoses.
One-one has black dots on it.
And the other one has a-a yellow stripe.
The one with the black dots... That's the one. Turn that off.
Wait. Wait. Wait. Stop. Stop. Stop.
Wait. What are you doing?
The black dots is the return exhaust.
If you flip it, it's gonna spark.
The yellow stripes.. That's the main feed.
No, it's not!
Dude, you're wrong, alright? And for what it's worth
you're also acting kind of like a douche.
- Hey, guys... - Shut up, Harry!
Listen, I was here when
'they installed the damn thing.' I know what I'm talking about.
(Guerrero) 'You think this is the first time'
I've been in a situation like this?
- I know how to fix this. - Harry, so help me, God..
This is about Bangkok.
- This ain't the time, Harry! - No, shut up! Shut up!
Who took over that car and saved you?
(Both) He did.
Bingo! I don't want to get into other people's business
but it looks like this is clouding your judgment.
Wait. If you didn't save me, then who did?
(Both) Chance.
Oh, you have got to be kidding me.
I'm gonna kill him.
Not if I get to him first.
Excuse me! Is everybody still alive?
- Huh? - The gas stopped.
- 'Yeah, yeah, it did.' - Oh, thank God.
Now, will someone come up with a plan
so I don't freeze to death up here?
Hey, I don't know about you but I'm not gonna sit around here
and just wait for Chance to ride to the rescue as usual.
- Agreed. - See, that's the spirit.
That's the spirit. Now what do we do?
Ames, can you turn that gas back on if we ask you to?
- Yeah. - I got an idea.
Why are we turning the gas on?
Why are we turning the gas back on?
Harry, just shut up.
♪ You're riding the waves.. ♪
Nice neighborhood. Oh, just one more thing.
Oh, just the one?
How'd you get the scars?
I grew up in Belfast
'in the middle of someone else's fight.'
Right in the worst of it.. Lots of shooting...
[scoffs] Not a great place for a child to walk to school in the morning.
Northern Ireland, you don't have the...
- The accent. - Yeah.
After this, I was..
[scoffs] I was sent to London.
And I put myself through school there
and I worked really hard.
I made something of myself.
Well, I definitely owe you an apology
for that "trophy wife" comment. I'm sorry about that.
Well, I'm sorry I flicked
the most poisonous spider in the world at you.
Ah.
Even-steven.
So, uh, with regards
to our professional relationship..
Yeah, it could be a little dicey.
We have to be careful.
People might start thinking we're actually becoming friends.
Good evening, Mrs. Pucci.
(Harry) Are you guys almost finished?
My God, I'm a human being!
After this many hours, I need to eat.
Is there nothing to eat in here, like ketchup packets
or, good God, a throat lozenge or something to munch on?
If I could just kill him myself
they'd probably let us go, wouldn't they?
It's worth a shot. I think this is about ready.
That's not gonna work.
Hey! It's gonna work.
[softly] Is this gonna work?
I'd say there's a 50/50 chance
we end up burning down the office building.
But on the bright side, Chance won't get the satisfaction
of coming in here and rescuing us.
50/50.. I can live with that.
I'd feel a whole lot better about this, though
if the seal on this nozzle were a little tighter.
- Give me your belt. - What?
Come on, I need something I can use as a clamp.
Why can't we use your belt?
I'm not wearing a belt today.
- Why not? - Because my pants fit.
What difference does it make? Give me your belt.
Yo. The distraction ready?
(Ames) 'Okay, look, a couple of things..'
First, I don't appreciate being referred to
as "the distraction".
'And second, I think this is a stupid idea.'
But, yes, I'm ready.
Okay. Everybody's a critic. Just go.
[clanking]
[grunts]
Does anybody have a shirt I can borrow?
[beeping rapidly]
[gunfire]
Dude..
Do I even want to know?
(Harry) 'Is it safe yet?'
- Harry. - Hey, Chance.
Well, that explains everything.
[intense music]
Your friend..
Where is he?
I don't know what you're talking about.
[gasps]
He's going to die today.
But if you help me find him, maybe you won't.
Big day today, Harry. Okay, which one do you want?
[mutters]
Okay, I get the whole Harry and the Armenian mob thing.
I get the Ames in the bikini.
I get why Winston wasn't wearing a belt for the most part.
And I get that you guys were a little upset
that I had some fun at your expense
over the whole Bangkok thing four and a half years ago.
But what is still buggin' me, is that you signed a contract.
What?
With Ilsa.. An employment contract.
- No, I didn't. - Yeah, you did.
No, I did not.
I don't sign anything.
- She played me. - It would appear so.
Why would she do that?
She'd know that I'd find out as soon as I got back.
Probably the first time a woman lied
without, uh, thinkin' it through.. Congratulations.
- Yeah, but... - She didn't want you to leave.
You know, also, you're really bad at reading chicks, dude.
Seriously.. Just sayin'..
[cell phone ringing]
Speak of the devil.
Just talking about you.
I need you to come back to my place.
You alright?
No. No, I'm not alright.
Clear your throat if you can't speak freely.
What's going on?
Hector Lopez is here.
You said you wanted him here.
That's exactly what you're gonna get.
[The Boxer Rebellion's Semi Automatic]
[car engine revving]
♪ I am waiting ♪
♪ In a world you don't want ♪
♪ Suffocating ♪
♪ By an endless weak spot ♪
♪ Please know up here ♪
♪ My hands are tied up too ♪
♪ From all I can see ♪
♪ Makes it hard for me ♪
♪ The last one to say ♪
♪ Good son ♪
♪ One more day.. ♪
[gunshot]
[music continues]
♪ All I can see ♪
Ilsa?
♪ Makes it hard for me ♪
♪ The last one to say ♪
♪ Good son ♪
♪ One more day ♪
[theme music]