奥斯汀.保威,神秘情报员
于1967年冷冻
在90年代解冻
对抗他的死敌邪恶博士
他阻止邪恶博士毁灭地球之后
将他驱逐到外太空
然后和新婚太太凡妮莎
过着幸福美满的日子
他想得美
休士顿,这是秃鹰号 Houston,this is Condor.
我们要进行任务 We are doing an E.V.A.of the payload.
我们正准备把器材… We are about to present the module with--
搞什么？ What the--
我的老天爷 Oh,my gentle Jesus.
休士顿,出了问题 Houston...we have a problem.
开始发射程序 Launch procedure commence.
这时候…
好棒,好棒哦…奥斯汀正在忙
老天呀 Oh,God!
我累毙了 And I'm spent.
完事后你抽烟吗？ Do you smoke after sex？
不晓得,我没去看 I don't know,baby.I never looked.
你好坏哦 Oh,Austin!
现在做什么？ What shall we do now？
我有个点子,再来一次如何？ Well,I've got an idea.Why don't we shag？
-再来一次？ -当然,宝贝 -Again？ -Sure,baby.
性爱宝典才做到第十一章 We're only up to chapter eleven in the"Kama Sutra."
你不想试老汉推车、倒浇蜡烛 Don't you want to try the wheelbarrow or the praying donkey...
或是饿马奔槽吗？ or the Chinese shag swing？
我去倒香槟,超级猛男 I'm going to get us some more champagne,jungle boy.
你还好吧？ Are you OK？
我好得不得了 I've never felt better,Austin.
那就好 All right,then.
我要看一部电影 I'm just gonna go watch a movie.
我最爱的电影[时空贱谍] "In Like Flint."That's my favorite movie.
凡妮莎,你是怎么了？ Vanessa.What's going on？
你在说什么？ I don't know what you mean,Austin.
我很正常… I'm the same Vane--
你一定是…"双语" You must be--Tu imaginacion esta jugando con ti,querido.
我的天呀 Oh,my God!
凡妮莎,你是女机器人 You're a fembot!
你才知道呀,天才 No shit,Sherlock!
木阑机关枪 Machine gun jubblies？
我怎么没看到？ How did I miss those,baby？
下次你最好来点前戏 Perhaps next time you should try foreplay.
这是你的结婚礼物 Here's your wedding present,Mr.Powers.
我邪恶博士送你的… A kamikaze bride from me--
…劲爆新娘 Dr.Evil.
谢天谢地 Oh,thank God.
凡妮莎,我的最爱 I can't believe Vanessa my bride...
我今生的新娘 my one true love...
驯服我这颗狂野的心的女人 the woman who taught me the beauty of monogamy...
一直都是一个女机器人 was a fembot all along.
等一下,我恢复单身了 Wait a tick.That means I'm single again!
棒呆了 Oh,behave!
好耶,宝贝 Yeah,baby,yeah!
站住 Halt!
是的,宝贝,是啊！ Yeah,baby,yeah!
看！ Look!
你好,谢了 How are you？
很高兴见到你 Good to see you.
那是什么？ What's that？
是的.是啊,好的,伙计. Yes.Yeah,that.Good one,man.
是布莱恩吗？ What's goin' on here？
很高兴见到你们 Good to see you guys.
很高兴见到你 Good to see you.
拉比,你们好吗？ 漂亮的肉! Rabbis,how are you？ Nice meat.
摆姿势 Photo op.
干杯 L'chaim!
好耶,宝贝 Yeah,baby.
北约监测中心,关岛
留意科索沃的情况 Keep a close eye on that Kreplachistan situation.
是,长官 Yes,sir.
傑利…傑利… Jerry! Jerry!
谢谢大家,非常感谢 Thank you.Thank you very much.
今天的主题是 If you just joined us,today's topic is...
想要统治世界的邪恶老爸 My father is evil,and he wants to take over the world.
请欢迎史考特邪恶 OK,let's meet Scott Evil.
史考特,欢迎 Hi,Scott.Nice to have you with us.
谢了,傑利 Thanks,Jerry
谈谈你老爸 Tell us about your father.
我老爸是邪恶集团的首脑 My dad is the head of a worldwide evil organization...
他想要统治世界 with aspirations of world domination.
听起来很可怕 他人在哪儿？ Pretty serious stuff.Where is he now？
他被冷冻起来,绕着地球转 He's,like,cryogenically frozen...orbiting the earth or something.
话别说得那么早 That's what you think.
我要给你一个惊喜 We have a surprise for you.
大家掌声欢迎邪恶博士 Let's bring out Scott's father Dr.Evil!
"邪恶博士想要统治世界"
什么？ What？
将军,出了状况 General,we've got a situation here.
什么事？ What is it,Sergeant？
你好,史考特 Hello,Scott.
老爸回来了 Daddy's back.
你害我在全国电视上出糗 How could you do this to me,on national television？
别这么激动,好吗？ Well,throw me a frickin' bone here,Scott.
你为什么抛弃我？ Why'd you run out on me？
因为你不够邪恶 Because you're not quite evil enough.
真的嘛 Well,it's true.
你只是半路出家的邪恶 You're quasi-evil.
你只是表面邪恶 You're semi-evil.
你是邪恶的人造黄油. You're the margarine of evil.
你邪恶程度和健怡可乐一样 You're the Diet Coke of evil.
只有一卡路里,不够邪恶 Just one calorie.Not evil enough.
你是畸形吗？ What are you,some kind of freak？
-给我闭嘴 -行,来吧. -Shut up,you-- -OK,come on.
我要海扁你一顿 I'll kick your...punk.
来呀,臭家伙 Bring it on,skanky All right,come on.
没有人可以欺负我儿子 No one talks to my son like that.It's OK,Scott.
你这狗娘养的 You mother--
没卵蛋的孬种 You were born in your mother's--
傑利…傑利… 我没事 I'm OK.All right.
你这娘娘腔 You were born in your mother's--
我要宰了你们 I'll kill you both!
你去那里！太好了 There you go!Great!
我抢到你的头罩 I got your hood!
冷静点,好了…够了… Settle down.It's OK.
这只是电视节目 It's only a television show.Calm down.
我没事了 I'm all right.
-你们不必干架,确定？ - 确定 I'm easy.Everything OK？ -OK.
把这混球赶出去 Get this jerk out of here.
臭四眼田鸡 I'll give you--piece of--
他咬我,他咬我 He's biting me!The...is biting me!
世界是我的,怎么样？ The world is mine,you--
这时候在英国
你有电子邮件 You've got mail.
小苏,你好 Hello,Basil.
奥斯汀,蜜月愉快吗？ Hello,Austin.How was your honeymoon？
凡妮莎是女机器人 It turns out that Vanessa was a fembot.
我们早就知道了 Yes.We knew all along,sadly.
你有一个新任务 Anyway,I have a new assignment for you.
你要去拍写真照 You're scheduled for a photo shoot
一个模特儿替邪恶博士工作 and one of the models works for Dr.Evil.
酷毙了 Groovy,baby!
贱豹跑车 Shaguar,ho!
"风流美男子"
奥斯汀的贱窝,伦敦
模特儿来吧,看我施展魔力 Show me to the models,baby.Let the magic begin.
今天有什么人？ Who have we got today？
棒呆了 OK,great.
久仰大名,我是超级名模丽贝卡·罗梅恩 Austin Powers,I've heard a lot about you.I'm Rebecca Romijn.
真不敢相信能有机会跟你合作 I don't believe I've had the pleasure.
你当然没跟我合"做"过 Well,of course you haven't had the pleasure,Rebecca.
我们才刚见面 We just met,baby.Yeah.
宝贝儿,你是谁？ Who are you,baby？
艾娃娜 Ivana.
爱凡娜哈泼辣 Ivana Humpalot.
什么？ Excuse me？
爱凡娜哈泼辣 Ivana Humpalot.
听说爱凡娜黄金马桶,销售量不是很好 And Ivanna toilet made out of solid gold but it's just not in the cards,is it？
不好笑 You know...
大伙儿,干活吧 OK,everyone,let's get started.
太美了,笑一下吧 Yes,beautiful.Feeling it!Let's get some smiles.It's all in here.
棒呆了,用点想像力 That's it.Yes!Let's let the inside out.
你是动物,你是只老虎 OK,you're an animal!Yes,there we go.You're a tiger!
你是母老虎,快发威吧 You're Tony the Tiger!You're grrreat!
太好了,你是只狐猴 Very good.Loving it.Now you're a lemur.
跑来跑去,跑到左边 Running as a pack.We go left.
跑到右边 We go right.
有一只掠食动物,这是怎么回事？ There's a predator out of the jungle.What's going on？
快挖洞 Burrow!
很好,你只是只狐猴 That's right,you're a lemur.That's all you've got.
没有尖牙利爪 You don't have sharp teeth capable of biting.
只能像龟孙子一样躲起来 Make an interconnected series of tunnels like the Viet Cong.
你看,我都没在拍,太扯了 And look.I'm not even shooting you.It's crazy.
我累毙了 And I'm spent.
大伙儿,收工了 Right,that's a wrap,everyone.
哈泼辣小姐 Miss Humpalot.
亲爱的 Da,darling？
我们要不要？ Shall we？
给我一分钟 Give me moment,hmm？
邪恶博士总部,西雅图,星星咖啡
邪恶博士 Dr.Evil,several years ago...
几年前我投资一家小咖啡店 we invested in a small Seattle-based coffee company.
如今星星咖啡变成连锁咖啡集团 Today Starbucks offers premium quality coffee at affordable prices.
棒呆了 De-lish!
邪恶博士 Dr.Evil,
如果把资金全都用来卖咖啡 If we shift our resources away from evil empires and towards Starbucks...
利润会暴增五倍 we can increase our profits five-fold.
老二,我在这儿是老大 Number Two,I make the decisions here,OK？
对我尊重点 I demand a little respect.
邪恶博士,你有… Dr.Evil,you have a little of the...
住嘴! Silence!
别对我无礼 I will not tolerate your insolence!
法罗,你好吗？ Frau Farbissina,wie geht es ihnen？
我很好,博士 Sehr gut,Herr Doktor.
近来如何？ How are things？
我终于有勇气面对自己 I have come to embrace the love that dare not speak its name.
这是我的爱人 To my right is my lover.
我们在高球赛认识 We met at the LPGA Tour.
她是一眉道姑 Her name is Unibrau.
是啊 Right on.
欢迎,一眉道姑 Welcome,Unibrau.
博士,你 Doctor,you...
干什么？ What？
你的嘴唇上沾了牛奶 A little milk...nose...mustache.
我知道啦 I know.
我故意的 Meant to.
我们在比利时都是这样喝的 That's how we drink it in Belgium.
这叫比利时浸泡喝法 Called a Belgian dip.
你被冷冻以后 While you were frozen...
我们为你做了复制人 we began a program to clone you.
酷毙了 Cool.
把复制人带来 Send in the clone!
他跟你一模一样 He is exactly like you in every way.
却只有八分之一大小 Except one eighth your size.
不可思议,我就叫他 Breathtaking.I shall call him...
迷你咪 Mini-Me.
老二,干得好 Your stock is rising,Number Two.
来吧,无毛猫 Come,Mr.Bigglesworth.
迷你咪,你饿了吗？ Mini-Me,are you hungry？
想吃什么？热狗吗？ Something to eat？Not even a Hot Pocket？
连煎饼都不要？ An Eggo？
不行,不能吃猫咪 No,we don't gnaw on our kitty.
住手,别吃掉迷你猫 Leave Mini-Mr.Bigglesworth alone.
你要爱它疼它 Just love him and stroke him.
我辛苦想出的每个邪恶计划 As you know every diabolical scheme that I have hatched...
都被奥斯汀.保威破坏 has been thwarted by Austin Powers.
那是为什么呢？ And why is that,ladies and gentlemen？
因为你有机会不肯杀他 'Cause you never kill him when you get the chance to...
而且你是猪头？ and you're a big dope.
不…不… No ...no ...
迷你咪,坐下来 Down,Mini-Me.
那是因为他身上有魔酒 Austin Powers always defeats me because he has mojo.
魔酒？ Mojo？
魔酒! Mojo!
男人的生命泉源和力量 The libido.The life force.
男性的魅力和性能力 The essence.The right stuff.
俗话说得好 What the French call a certain...
四十岁还是一条活龙 I don't know what.
我发明了穿梭时空的机器 Ladies and gentlemen I've developed a device for traveling through time...
就叫做[时空机器] which I call a Time machine.
我要用时空机器 Using this Time machine...
回到六十年代,偷走奥斯汀.保威的魔酒 I'm going back to the Sixties and steal Austin Powers' mojo.
你有时光机器 If you have a time machine...
何不趁他蹲马桶把他除掉？ why not just go back and kill Austin Powers when he's sitting on the crapper or something？
我不想,行吗？ How about no,Scott？ OK？
何不到未来操纵股市？ Why not use your knowledge of the future to play the stock market？
大可以赚数兆元 We could make trillions.
数兆元比不上… Why make trillions when we could make...
数亿元 billions？
兆比亿多耶,猪头 A trillion is more than a billion,numnuts.
别说了 All right,zip it.
-你根本就… -闭嘴 -You can't even-- -Zip it.
闭嘴(台语) Zi-i-i-p.
陪审团的先生女士,闭嘴 Look,all I'm Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,ex-zip-it"A.
老二,说说话呀 Number Two,would you please back me up？
-你们看,我是多嘴先生 -它可以升 -Look,I'm Zippi Longstocking.-l can't--
碰到麻烦,给我闭嘴 When a problem comes along You must zip it
乖乖闭嘴 Zip it good.
法罗,拜托 Frau,would you please--
#&*
字幕写:闭嘴 Subtitle:"Zip it.
-我只是想… -闭嘴 -I'm just trying to-- -Zip.
闭嘴,你想吃奶嘴吗？ Would you like to have a suckle of my zipple？
-想你...停止...闭嘴.-听...全部...你知道... -l want you--Stop-- -Zip.Listen--All--You know--
你好像小孩子… You're like a child--
在说话...如果你...只是...一个时间 Talk in--If you-- Just--One time--
闭嘴,打开时空隧道 Zip it.Unveil the time portal.
保威在1967年冷冻 As you know Austin Powers was frozen in 1967.
我要回到他被冷冻两年后 Therefore,I will travel to 1969...
也就是1969年 two years after he was frozen.
他死定了 He'll be helpless.
我要回到过去,失陪了 Ladies and gentlemen I'm about to travel through time.I bid you adieu.
我没事 I'm OK.
忘了开,是吧？ Not turned on,I suppose.
麻烦你哦 Do you think you could...
谢了 Yeah,thanks.
迷你咪,来吧 Come,Mini-Me!
别害怕 Don't be scared,Mini-Me.
邪恶博士 Dr.Evil
欢迎回到1969年 Welcome to 1969.
谢谢你,老二 Thank you,Number Two.
你看起来好勇…好少年 You look so healthy and youthful.
谢谢夸奖 Well,thank you.
邪恶博士 Herr Doktor.
法罗,你看起来… And Frau,you look so...
老样子 Right.
我收到你传来的备忘录 I received your memo from the future.
新地洞都准备好了 Your new lair is up and running.
是不是在火山洞里？ Is it a hollowed-out volcano like I asked for？
当然了 Of course.
很好 Good.
一切都照计划进行 Then it's all going perfectly to plan.
好耶,宝贝 Yeah,baby,yeah!
这时候,1999年
那是几时买的？ When did you get the Clapper？
1964年11月 November 1964.
我在西印度群岛买的 Dutch East Indies.Shore leave.
你知道俄国人怎么取暖吗？ Do you know how we keep warm in Russia？
我猜得到 I can guess,baby.
我们都下棋 We play chess.
我猜错了 I guessed wrong.
下棋得靠头脑,保威先生 It takes a keen intellect to play chess.
你应该会玩吧 I assume you know how to play.
当然了 Of course,baby.
该怎么办…？ What to do,what to do.
我有个问题,你要老实说 Let me ask you a question.And be honest.
我让你心痒痒的吗？是吧？ Do I make you horny,baby？ Do I？
我让你兴奋了吗？ Do I make you randy？
我不玩游戏了 No more games.
邪恶博士派我来杀你 Dr.Evil sent me here to kill you...
不过你是这么性感 but I find you so sexy and...
跟我做爱吧 Just make love to me.
上我吧,快点 Now,Austin Powerovich.Hurry!
你像野兽一样全身长毛 You're hairy like animal!
来吧,宝贝,棒呆了 Grr,baby! Very grr!
野男人,快上吧 Make love to me,monkey man.
我们该怎么偷走他的魔酒？ Dr.Evil,I don't understand how we can hope to steal Austin Powers' mojo.
我们尝试过 We've tried this before.
那地方戒备森严 The security around Powers is foolproof.
这次国防部有我的内线 But this time we have an operative inside the Ministry of Defense.
真的吗？ Really？
真的 Yes,really.
他正在偷保威的魔酒 He's stealing Austin Powers' mojo even as we speak.
真的吗？ Really？
真的 Really
他是个苏格兰护卫 He's a disgruntled Scottish guard...
脾气暴躁、食量惊人 known for his lethal temper and his unusual eating habits.
他有一吨重,他就是… He weighs a metric ton.
…肥霸 His name...Fat Bastard.
根据线报,这儿有间谍,国防部冷冻室 We've had reports there's a spy in the Ministry of Defense.
这玩意攸关国家安全 The contents of this room are vital to the country.
一定要提高警觉 Be on special alert.
是,长官 Yes,sir.
拜托你去减肥,好吗？ And try to lose some weight,for God's sake.
是,长官 Yes,sir.
臭英国佬敢叫我减肥 Mr.English colonel tellin' me to lose weight.
他还敢嘲笑我 I'm a hard case,he says.
给我听好,我最爱吃婴儿 Well,listen up,sonny Jim I ate a baby!
婴儿是健康食品 Oh,aye,baby.The other other white meat.
婴儿餐最营养 Baby: It's what's for dinner.
"魔酒:满" I've got your mojo now,sonny Jim.
小贱谍,我拿到你的魔酒了 Cheap spy,I got your mojo
怎么了？ What's wrong？
惨了,我的魔酒消失了 Crikey!I've lost my mojo.
检验证实你失去了魔酒 Austin,the test results confirm that you've lost your mojo...
这真不是时候 and it couldn't come at a worse time.
邪恶博士发明了时光机器 We have evidence that Dr.Evil has developed a time machine...
他回到1969年 and has traveled back to the year 1969.
我们也发明时光机器送你回去 Luckily,we,too have developed a time travel device to transport you back to the Sixties.
输入你要去的年份 This is where you input your destination.
等一下 Wait a tick.
我在1967年就被冷冻 Basil,if I travel back to 1969 and I was frozen in 1967...
我能去看冰冻的自己 presumably,I could go visit my frozen self.
要是我被冷冻起来 But if I'm still frozen in 1967...
现在怎么能被解冻再回到… how could I have been unthawed in the Nineties and traveled back--
糟糕,我被搞混了 Oh,no,I've gone cross-eyed.
你就别伤脑筋了 I suggest you don't worry about this sort of thing...
好好地享受 and just enjoy yourself.
大家都一样 That goes for you all,too.
对 Right
这太棒了 This is smashing,Basil.
我就回到过去,找回魔酒 I go back to the Sixties,recharge my mojo...
打败邪恶博士,回来喝下午茶 defeat Dr.Evil,and be back in time for tea.
六十年代我来也 Swinging Sixties,here I come,baby,yeah!
让开…让开… Move! Move!
不,不 No,no
抱歉,那一定很贵 Sorry.I bet that's expensive.
不好意思 Sorry.
很简单！ Easy!
现在停下来,奥斯汀！ Stop it now,Austin!
讨厌,好了 Here we go.
好耶,宝贝 Yeah,baby,yeah!
祝你好运,奥斯汀.保威 Godspeed,Austin Powers.
1969年,奥斯汀的贱窝
我回来了 I'm home!
是奥斯汀.保威耶 is Austin Powers.
我回到六十年代了,好耶 I'm back in the Sixties,baby,yeah!
棒呆了 Rod stayed
别乱摸我的性感臀部 Get your hands off my Heinie,baby.
宝贝,你是谁？ Who are you today,baby？
我叫罗苹吞吞 My name is Robin Swallows.
吞吞,真有趣的名字 Swallows.That's an interesting name.
小名叫吐吐呢 Maiden name's Spitz.
到底是什么？宝贝 Which is it,baby,
吐吐还是吞吞？ Spitz or Swallows？
你裤子真紧 Those are skintight.
怎么弄进去的呢？ How do you get into those pants,baby？
先从请我喝杯酒开始吧! You can start by buying me a drink.
我要…我要… I want! I want!
冷静点,她替邪恶博士做事 Better play it cool.Your friend works for Dr.Evil.
你又替谁做事？宝贝 And just who do you work for,baby？
保先生,告诉我 Tell me,Mr.Powers...
你很风流吗？ do you swing？
别开玩笑 Are you kidding,baby？
我比楚留香还风流 I put the"Grr!？in"swinger,baby!
你就跟我过来…这儿吧 Then why don't you come right over here.
好,我就过去 I can do that.
轻点 Tap
纳命来吧!时空贱谍007 Prepare to die,Powers!
机关枪 Use the machine gun!
上西天吧 Say good-bye,Powers!
火箭炮 Use the bazooka!
不,不! No,no!
我们会被摔死的 The fall will kill us both,Powers!
你赢不了的 You can't win,Powers.
你怎么不死呢？ Why won't you die？
搭便车吗？ Care for a ride？
快走…快走… Go!
你一定是奥斯汀.保威 Austin Powers,I presume.
我叫保威,保证威猛 Powers by name,Powers by reputation.
我是中情局的菲嚐爱高 Felicity Shagwell,CIA.
爱高是我的名字 Shagwell by name...
搞得非常好是我的风评 shag-very-well by reputation.
克制一点 Oh,behave!
我无法克制自己 Not if I can help it.
英国乡间
真是不可思议 You know what's remarkable is how much England...
英国跟南加州根本不像 looks in no way like Southern California.
糟糕 Crikey!
邪恶博士的杀手追来了 We've got company! Looks like one of Dr.Evil's assassins.
别乱来 Steady now.
手举起来 Hands up!
你记得我吗,奥斯汀.保威？ Do you remember me,Austin Powers？
我不记得名字 I don't recall your name but your...
不过你很面善 fez is familiar.
我叫慕斯蛋塔,我要杀死你 My name is Mustafa.And I'm the man who will be killing you now.
达克雷尔！ Daktari!
谁派你来的？ Who sent you？
我死也不说 You'll have to kill me.
谁派你来的？ Who sent you？
滚你的蛋吧 Kiss my ass,Powers.
谁派你来的？ Who sent you？
邪恶博士 Dr.Evil.
-这么容易呀 -他真逊 -That was easy.-That was.
你为什么要招？ Why did you tell us？
别人问我三次,我就会乖乖招 I can't stand to be asked the same question three times.It just irritates me.
邪恶博士在哪儿？ Where is Dr.Evil hiding？
我只是小啰喽,怎么会知道？ Why would he tell me？ I'm just one of his low-level functionaries.
邪恶博士在哪儿？ Where is Dr.Evil hiding？
你拷问我,我也不会说 You'll have to torture me.I'll never tell you.
-邪恶博士在哪儿？ -讨厌,三遍了 -Where is Dr.Evil hiding？ -Damn! Three times.
他躲在一个秘密火山洞 He's hiding in the secret volcano lair.
邪恶博士的火山洞在哪里？ Where's Dr.Evil's secret volcano lair？
我向你吐口水 I spit at the question.
我一定要问你2次吗？ Do I really have to ask you two more times？
去死吧 Go to hell,Powers!
好吧 Fine.
邪恶博士的火山洞在哪里？ Where is Dr.Evil's secret volcano lair？
我死都不会告诉你 I will take it to the grave with me.
他问了三次,你一定要回答 You have to answer.He asked you three times.
不对 Wrong
他后来问: The second question was...
我一定要问你二次吗？ Do I really have to ask you two more times？
那是一个新问题 That would be the first question in a new line of questioning...
跟另一个问题无关 and wouldn't count in the other line of questioning.
他说得对 He's right.
我只是想套出你的话 However,I'm just trying to get information from you,man.
不必问同样的问题 I don't need any consistency in the questions,do l？
不,我才不吃你这一套 No.You're preaching to the converted--
既然你不吃我这一套 If I'm preaching to the converted...
为什么经不起别人问三遍？ then why are you being so slavish to the three-question form？
你正眼都不瞧我 You're not even looking at me,man.
很没礼貌耶 Now you're just being rude,you know what I mean？
你没在听 You're not listening,man.
一定很痛 Oh,crikey!
你终于碰到对手了 Well,Austin,I think this time you have finally met your match.
才怪,宝贝 Oh,no,baby.
这次我照样能打败邪恶博士 I've beaten Dr.Evil before,and I'll beat him again.
我是说我啦 I was talking about me.
好耶 yes
上面的人,我掉到悬崖下面 Hello up there!I seem to have fallen down a cliff.
我没死,不过伤得很重 I'm still alive,but I'm very badly injured.
腿好像断了,但我试着站起来 I think my legs are broken.I'll try to stand.
没错,腿断了 Yes,they are broken.
拜托丢个OK绷给我好吗？ Perhaps you could toss me a band-aid or some antibacterial cream.
我现在痛得要命 I'm in an extraordinarily large amount of pain.
骨头刺穿皮肤,我怕会发炎 The bone has gone through the skin.I fear it might be gangrenous.
伤口有杏仁的味道 The wound is beginning to smell a little like almonds...
这不太妙,求求你们 which is not good.Please？ No one？
抱歉 Sorry.
我试着用另一条腿 I'll try the other leg.
两名杀手都死了 Two of my assassins are dead.
我无法忍受失败 I will not tolerate failure.
我得维护邪恶集团的尊严 I'm the man who will maintain the dignity of this evil organization.
那是怎么回事？ What the hell was that？
火山爆发 Volcanic eruption!
这是我在国防部的间谍 May I present to you my spy in the Ministry of Defense...
肥霸 Fat Bastard.
先别忙,厕所在哪儿？ First things first! Where's your shitter？
我快要急死了 I've got a turtle head poking out.
真好 Charming.
我不是开玩笑 I'm not kidding.
我就快要屁滚尿流了 I got a crap on deck that could choke a donkey.
忍不住了 It's squidgey!
老天,我差点哭出来,你知道吗？ Christ,I'm getting all emotional from it,you know？
是啊 Right.
肥霸,把魔酒给我,好吗？ Fat Bastard,could I have my mojo,please？
我的钱呢？ Where's my money？
把他的钱给他吧 All right,give him his money.
乖乖,他好小哦 Jesus Christ,he's tiny!
我拉的屎都比他大 I've had bigger chunks of corn in my crap.
等一下 Wait a minute.
他有点像婴儿 He kinda looks like a baby.
过来,我要吃你 Come here! I'm gonna eat you!
我比你强,正所谓弱肉强食 I'm bigger than you.I'm higher on the food chain.
让我一口把你吞掉 Get in my belly!
来吧！ Come on!
你走狗屎运 You're lucky,wee man!
抱一下 Can I have a hug？
邪恶博士,咱们谈个条件 Let me make you a deal,all right？
你拿着魔酒,然后钱也留着 You get the mojo,you keep your money...
让我吃你的宝宝 and I'll get your baby.
是啊 Right.
我要吃宝宝…我要吃宝宝… I want my baby back,baby back
宝贝回来,宝贝回来,宝贝回来 Baby back,baby back,baby back ribs
我希望我的宝贝回来,宝贝回来 I want my baby back,baby back
宝贝回来,宝贝回来,宝贝回来 Baby back,baby back,baby back ribs
对不起 Excuse me.
白白胖胖的宝宝 Chili Baby back ribs
我们该怎么对付保威？ Dr.Evil,what are we going to do about Powers？
奥斯汀.保威已经威胁不了我了 Austin Powers is no longer a threat to me.
我拿到他的魔酒 I have his mojo.
大家退下去 All right,everyone,you're dismissed.
我要有一点隐私 Private time.
我不希望影响公事 Dr.Evil,I don't want this to interfere with our work.
放心,不会尴尬的 Don't worry,mama.Things won't get weird.
一口给我 One for me...
一口给他 and one for my homies.
博士 Herr Doktor.
咱们搞吧
国防部冷冻室
发生什么事？ So what happened here？
一个叫肥霸的内贼闯进来 Apparently a rogue agent named Fat Bastard infiltrated the unit assigned to guard your cryogenic chamber.
他用催眠瓦斯迷倒警卫 He used some sort of nerve gas.These men don't remember a thing.
请你查一下肥霸的档案 Captain,why don't you cross-check Fat Bastard's profile
登陆到在兰利的主机？ with the mainframe at Langley？
是的 Yes,ma'am.
借一下,谢谢 Can I borrow that,please？ Thank you.
好耶,奥斯汀 Good Lord,Austin
我真是性感风流,宝贝 Look at me.I'm a sexy bitch,baby.Yeah!
你像支冰棒 You're a Popsicle,yes.
不,不 No,No
我累毙了 And I'm spent.
走吧,宝贝 Let's go,baby,yeah!
嘿.你好吗？ Hey there.How are you？
来吧,菲嚐爱高 Come on,Felicity.
好耶,宝贝 Yeah,babe.
坐下来好吗？ Shall we sit down？
很好 Very well
棒呆了 This is great.
酷毙了 Groovy!
未来是怎么样？ So,Austin,what's the future like？
大家都开飞行车,吃食物丸 Well,everyone has a flying car entire meals come in pill form...
地球受到人猿统治 and the Earth is ruled by damned dirty apes!
我的天 Oh,my God!
你上当了 Had you for a second.
你大可以上我 You can have me for even longer,if you want.
你有够骚了,宝贝 You're one groovy baby...
宝贝 baby.
太多宝贝了 Too many babies.
别走开 Don't you dare move.
女士们,先生们,贝克拉克和卡斯提洛先生 Ladies and gentlemen,Mr.Burt Bacharach and Mr.Elvis Costello.
什么喜欢你,爱上你？ What do you get when you fall in love？
通过PIN码来爆你泡帅哥 A guy with a pin to burst your bubble
你想跳舞吗？ Would you care to dance？
很想 I'd love to.
对于所有的烦恼 For all your trouble
我永远 I'll
不会再恋爱了 Never fall in love again
我永远不会再恋爱了 I'll never fall in love again
别告诉我,那是怎么一回事 Don't tell me what it's all about
因为我一直在那里,我很高兴我摆脱 'Cause I've been there and I'm glad I'm out
摆脱了那些枷锁,而那些枷锁在捆绑你 Out of the those chains,those chains that bind you
这就是为什么我要提醒你 That is why I'm here to remind you
什么喜欢你,爱上你？ What do you get when you fall in love？
你只得到了谎言,痛苦和悲伤 You only get lies and pain and sorrow
所以至少要等到明天 So for at least until tomorrow
我不会 I'll
再恋爱了 Never fall in love again
我永远 I'll
不会相爱了 Never fall in love
同样 Again
你腿功还不错 You're quite good on your feet.
我不只腿功厉害,我还有更厉害的 I'm even better off my feet.
克制一点,宝贝 Oh,behave,baby.
-嗨 -嗨 -Hi.-Hi there.
你好吗？ How are things？
很好,你呢？ Good,Herr Doktor.And you？
好得很 Great.
忙里偷闲吗？ Just taking a break？
试试热狗,很好吃 Try the Hot Pockets.They're breathtaking.
很尴尬,对吧？ It got weird,didn't it？
-对 -我就知道 -Ja.-l knew it.
你都没跟人家联络 You haven't called.
我们说过这不会尴尬的 We talked about this.We promised each other it wouldn't get weird.
我不想让这件事影响我征服世界的霸业 I can't let my feelings for you interfere with my taking over the world,you know that.
你知道我不会再爱别的男人了 You know,I will never love another man.
这倒是真的 Yes,that's true.
邪恶博士,我晚了 Dr.Evil,I'm late.
你来得正是时候 No,you got here right on time.
不,我是说我那个晚了 No,I mean I'm late.
老爸 Dad.
史考特 Scott
小子,你跑来干么？ Hey there,sport.What are you doing here？
我在想,也许我们能和好 I was just thinking that maybe we could work all this out.
毕竟你是我老爸 After all,you are my father.
史考特,来不及了 Scott,you had your chance,OK？
我有一个复制人 I already had someone created in my image.
他很邪恶,也想统治世界 He's evil,he wants to take over the world...
而且能塞进行李箱 and he fits easily into most overhead storage bins.
他？ Him？
看看他,他疯了 Look at him,he's crazy.
他就像只凶恶的吉娃娃 He's like a vicious little Chihuahua thing.
他逮到机会就会杀我 He'll kill me the first chance he gets.
大概吧 Probably.
我爱你… I love you.
我是性感美男子 I am a sexy bitch.Yes.
菲嚐,尽管随便坐,宝贝 Felicity,make yourself at home,baby.
你觉得我的爱窝如何？ What do you think of my shag pad,darling？
太酷了 It's amazing,Austin.
等一下 Wait a tick.
我的魔酒被肥霸偷走了 That's how my mojo was stolen.Fat Bastard.
她是专业情报员,才不会乱搞 She's a professional agent.She's not interested in shagging!
神啊救救我 Please,God.
卵蛋鸟蛋都是蛋 Spectacles,testicles,wallet,and watch.
奥斯汀,我在等呢 Austin,I'm waiting.
给我来点你有名的按摩如何？ How about one of your world-famous massages？
你是说性感按摩吗？ You mean a sensual massage？
-好吧 -开始了 Right,then.OK,here we go.Yes.
等一下,好痒哦 Wait a minute,something's itching me.
好多了 That's better.
卯死了 Crikey.
你感觉怎么样,宝贝？ How does that feel,baby？
低一点 Lower.
你感觉怎么样,宝贝？ How does that feel,baby？
怎么了？ What？
别害羞,咱们不必装了 You don't have to be cute with me.We're way past that.
是吗？ We are？
你说呢？ What do you think？
菲嚐,听我说 Listen,Felicity...
对不起,我不行 I'm sorry.I can't do this.
我得走了 I have to go.
是我的问题吗？ Is it me？
我无法解释 I can't explain.
菲嚐爱高,奥斯汀呢？ Hello,Agent Shagwell.Where's Austin？
我一定说错什么把他吓跑 I must've said something wrong,so he just left all of a sudden.
听好,菲嚐,别爱上奥斯汀 Listen,I don't want you getting too close to Austin.
你们注定无缘 It's not meant to be.
我不会爱上任何人 I don't get too close to anybody,Basil.
这一切都是为了工作 My interest in this case is purely professional.
那就好 Good.
我要你今晚找到肥霸 Then you won't mind tracking down Fat Bastard tonight.
没问题 No problem.
不择手段在他身上装追踪器 We need you to plant this homing device on him by any means necessary.
没问题 No problem.
继续努力 Keep up the good work.
记住,要不择手段 Remember,by any means necessary.
看看你,你以前像条活龙 Look at yourself.You used to be so virile.
你是风流美男子 You were a swinger,man.
现在像一条虫 And now you're nothing.
至少没有比这更糟的 But at least it can't get any worse.
爽吗？好丰盛的大餐 Well,surprise,surprise,huh!Look at that meal.
我的胴体有够性感了 I'm dead sexy.Look at my sexy body.
我比瑞奇马汀性感 Oh,look,I'm like a singer.Oh,sexy man,sexy man
我是宇宙超级猛男… Eating like a sexy man can
想吃鸡吗？还有耶 By the way,would you like some chicken？I've got more.
不要 No,thanks.
好吧 All right
吃完了,好了 好吧 What have we got here？
吃完了,好了 Done with that.
我把它放下来 All right,that's done.
记住,要不择手段 Remember,by any means necessary.
好像吃过了 Seems eaten
你很骚,是吧？ Frisky,are we？
来吧 Give it up!
这是邪恶计划的第二阶段 Ladies and gentlemen we're about to begin phase two of our evil project...
到底是第几阶段？ or is it phase-- I don't know phases.
反正我们要在月球上装雷射炮 Anyways,this is the phase in which we put a giant laser on the moon.
月球像这样绕着地球转 As you know,the moon rotates around the Earth,like so.
当月球对准了方向 When the moon reaches its appropriate lunar alignment...
就能摧毁华府 it will destroy Washington D.C.
我把月球变成所谓的--"死星" You see,I've turned the moon into what I like to call a Death Star.
-干么？ -没事,黑武士 -What？ -Nothing,Darth.
你叫我什么？ What did you call me？
没什么,骗局 Nothing.Rip-off!
不客气 Bless you.
最重要的是这支雷射炮 Anyways,the key to this plan is the giant laser.
它是牛津大学派森博士的发明 It was invented by the noted Cambridge physicist Dr.Parsons.
所以它叫"亚伦派森计划" Therefore,we shall call it the Alan Parsons Project.
拜托 Oh,my God.
又怎么了？ What now？
那是八十年代的摇滚乐团 The Alan Parsons Project is a progressive rock band in 1982.
干脆叫"文化俱乐部"算了 Why don't you just call it Operation Wang Chung,？ass？
什么？ What should we--
没事,"乔治男孩"会更棒 I'm sure Operation Bananarama will be huge.
你在说什么？ What are you saying？
-别白费心机 -嘘！ -If you wanted-- -Shh!
想成为... Trying to be hip--
WWW.shh.com.org.
-你所以 -嘘！ -You're so-- -Shh!
如果你们父子不吵架 If we could put aside the family squabbling...
我们就能办正事 I think we could get down to some serious business here.
-是吗？ -是的 -Really？ -Yeah.
你很没有礼貌哟 I don't like that insolent tone.
-我没有恶意 -你想当老大吗？ -l meant nothing by it.-You want to run things？
不是 No,not at all.
你想当老爸吗？ You want to be Daddy,is that it？
你想当家作主吗？ Number Two,you want to wear the Daddy pants？
你要哭了吗？ You gonna cry？
你在干什么？ What are you doing？
你想哭吗？ Are you gonna squirt some？ You gonna cry？
男子汉有泪不轻弹 See,you were gonna cry.You're a big man now,huh？
娘娘腔 Yeah,thought so.
菲嚐 Listen
奥斯汀 Austin.
关于昨晚的事… About what happened last night--
没关系,你不必解释 You don't have to explain.
不是的,你不明白 You don't understand.You see...
我失去了魔酒 I've lost my mojo.
所以你才会 Oh,so that's why you--
没错 Yes
我以为你不喜欢我 I thought you didn't like me.
才不,你很风骚带劲 Oh,no,baby.You're very shagadelic.
我只是不想再谈恋爱 I just didn't want to fall in love again...
我失去魔酒,你也不会爱我 and I thought you'd never love me without my mojo.
你很性感,你够劲爆 It's not you.You're fab,switched on,a bit of all right.Yes!
太棒了 That is so great.
我也想跟你说一件事 There's something I should tell you,too.
昨晚我在肥霸身上装追踪器 Last night,I planted a homing device on Fat Bastard.
棒呆了 Smashing,baby.
找到他,夺回魔酒,就回我的爱窝 Then we can track down Fat Bastard get my mojo,go back to my place...
咱们一起做爱做的事 hop on the good foot and do the bad thing.Yes!
不过我为了接近肥霸… But there's more.In order to get close to Fat Bastard,I had to--
喂？喂？ Hello,hello.
收到讯号,他在巴汀顿地铁站 The signal's coming through.He's at Paddington Station.
走吧 Let's go!
"巴汀顿地铁站"
-很接近了 -就这样走 -We're close,baby.-This way.
这里,直直走,左边,这儿 Straight--no,no,left.Through here.
逮到他了 We've got him.
把门撞开 Private,bring up the ram.
快…快… Go,go,go!
他人呢？ Where is he？
我的妈呀,肥霸拉了一坨屎 Oh,my God! Fat Bastard left a floater!
我的老天,臭死人了 In the name of all things sacred that is the most foul-smelling thing ever!
快冲马桶 Somebody flush it down!
什么也别碰 No,nobody touch anything.
我们得把它送到化检室 We have to get the sample to the lab to be analyzed.
我要吐了 I'm gonna give.
"肥霸的粪便样本"
化检结果出来了吗？ Austin,there you are.Has the sample been analyzed？
酷毙了,你穿得好辣哦 Cor,baby.You look very shagadelic!
菲嚐,这儿好无聊 But do we really have to be here,Felicity？I mean,it's so boring.
科学也不可靠 I don't believe in science.
当一个情报员就得靠…敏锐的直觉 When it comes to the spy game,to me,it's all instinct.
-大家好 -你好,小苏 -Hello,everybody.-Hello,Basil.
化检结果出炉 The results are in.
里面含有一座小岛的罕见植物 We've discovered trace elements of a rare vegetable...
就在加勒比海上 found only on one island,here,in the Caribbean.
棒呆了,这代表什么？ What does it all mean,Basil？
这就是邪恶博士的大本营 It means that this is the location of Dr.Evil's lair.
太好了 Smashing,Basil.
这杯咖啡闻起来像大便 Cor! This coffee smells like shit.
真的是大便 It is shit,Austin.
很好,我没猜错 Oh,good,then it's not just me.
还带点嚼劲儿 It's a bit nutty.
抱歉,邪恶博士 Excuse me,Dr.Evil.
我得跟你谈谈迷你咪 I have to speak to you about this Mini-Me.
他不能适应,是吗？ He's not fitting in？
他的脾气是不是太坏了？ Is he giving off too much of a creepy Oompa Loompa vibe？
不是,他太爱咬人 No,it's just that he bites.
他一直咬人 He's a biter.
怎么了？ What's wrong,Mini-Me？
告诉我好吗？ Something you want to tell us？
他在长牙 Teething.
帮我接美国总统 Get me the president of the United States of America!
"白宫闭路电视" Oh,he's on.
他出来了 He came out
邪恶博士,你要什么？ What do you want,Dr.Evil？
十二个小时后 Mr.President,in twelve hours...
我会用雷射炮摧毁华府 I will destroy Washington D.C.with this giant"laser.
什么？ What the--？
迷你咪,别搞雷射炮 Mini-Me,stop humping the laser.
真是的 OK,honest to God...
你不如跟雷射炮去开房算了 why don't you and the giant laser get a frickin' room？
我在摧毁华府以后 Mr.President,after I destroy Washington D.C...
每小时就会摧毁一个城市 I will destroy another major city every hour on the hour.
除非你肯付我… That is,unless,of course,you pay me...
…一千亿美元 one hundred billion dollars.
邪恶博士,这是1969年 Dr.Evil,this is 1969.
世上没有这么多钱 That amount of money doesn't even exist.
你干脆要万万兆元算了 That's like saying,I want a kajillion bajillion dollars.
别这样,秀钱给我看 Come on,Mr.President,show me the money.
秀什么钱给你看？ Show you what money？
秀钱给我看 Show me the money,show me the money.
你了不了？不了吗？ You had me at hello.Tear.Nothing？ No？
这是1969年 Psst! It's 1969.
[征服情海]30年后才上映 Jerry Maguire？won't come out for another thirty years.
没有人听得懂,猪头 Nobody knows what you're talking about,ass.
爸爸在工作,好吗？ Scott,Daddy's working,OK？
拜托你在这儿乖一点,好吗？ And when you're in the main chamber try and use the big boy voice,OK？
谢了 Thank you.
让我示范雷射炮的威力 Mr.President,allow me to demonstrate the awesome lethality of the Alan Parsons Project.
发射雷射 Fire the laser!
我的妈呀 Damage report! Damage report!
没事,没事了 It's OK.It's all right.Come on.
其实这是[ID4]的片段 Actually,that was footage from Independence Day...
雷射炮的威力跟电影一样 but the real laser would be a lot like that.
很可怕吧 Yeah,scary.
邪恶博士 Now,Dr.Evil--
跟手讲话,因为脸不想听了 Talk to the hand,'cause the face don't want to hear it.
什么手？跟你的手说话？ What hand？ Talk to your hand？
你太搞不清楚状况了 You ain't all that and a bag of potato chips.
你在说什么？ What are you talking about？
别这么不上道,小姐 Don't go there,girlfriend.
什么小姐？ Whose girlfriend？
别唬烂我,我是狠角色 Don't mess with me,I'm one crazy mo-fo.
有个条子惹毛我,我就毙了他 I had to pop a cop cause he wasn't giving me my props in Oaktown.
不懂吗？我在哪儿听过 No？ I heard that somewhere.
你是大白痴 You're an idiot.
总统先生,你应该明白了 Mr.President,I think we have an understanding.
拜了 Worship
你打算怎么对付时空贱谍007？ Dr.Evil,what are our plans regarding Austin Powers？
他是我的眼中刺 Austin Powers？ He's the snake to my mongoose.
还是眼中钉？ Or the mongoose to my snake.
随便啦,我不太懂 Either way,it's bad.I don't know animals.
不过我只知道 But I do know this--
这次他惹毛我了 This time it's personal.
把他干掉 Kill him.
那是邪恶博士的小岛 There's Dr.Evil's island.
搭帐篷吧 Let's set up camp.
小心点,袋子里有炸药 Be careful with that bag!There's explosives in it.
"邪恶博士火山岛,请勿进"
这很危险 This could be dangerous.
神啊给我多一点时间 What if God was one of us？
让我们一起牵手牵手 Just a slob like one of us
很好,非常好 Well done,very good.
那真是太精采了 Dr.Evil,that was fantastic.
谢谢你,我自己写的 Thank you,Number Two.I wrote that,yeah.
他把这个放我床上 Dad,he put this in my bed.
谁？ Who？
那个笨迷你咪 Your stupid mini-you.
他把臭鼠放我床上 He put road kill in my sheets!
迷你咪,别再这么做,好吗？ What--Mini-Me,don't you ever do that again.
千万别这么做 You hear me,don't you ever do that again!
你太可爱了,看看你 I can't stay mad at you.Look at that punum.
邪恶博士的大本营在那儿 Dr.Evil's headquarters is right over that next ridge.
我看看 Let me look.
可恶,该怎么进去？ Damn it.How do we get in？
妈咪,我要巧克力 Hello,Mummy.Can I have some chocolates？
我要士力架 I want some Mars Bars.
妈咪,别打我屁屁 Don't smack my bottom,Mummy.
抱歉,我失礼了 Sorry,love.I got stuck in your dirty pillows.
我看看地图 Let's look at the map.
你有什么计划？ Austin,what's our plan？
整座岛都是邪恶的爪牙 According to this map the entire island is crawling with Dr.Evil's guards.
别弄湿了炸药,在哪儿呢？ I want to make sure the explosives didn't get wet but I can't find them.
往底下找 Look in the bottom.
好,我挖伸一点 OK,I'll dig a little deeper.
袋子装得好满 Wow,this bag is really full.
继续挖吧 Just keep digging,darling.
我好像摸到了 I'll just feel around for them.
老天,你都装了些什么？ Good lord,Austin.What do you keep in here？
什么都装一点 Anything that catches my fancy,you know.
用力拉 Give it a good tug.
你需要这个吗？ Do we really need this？
请你别在里头打开来 I'll ask you not to open that inside,thank you very much.
天啊 Oh,my God.
放了气 没错 Oops,it went off.
偶而会泄气 Yes,it does that from time to time.
"烟雾弹" Eww.Yuck.
好可怕,不好意思 Yeah,that's nasty.Yeah,sorry about that.
好臭 Smelly.
这些人真是有够恶心 These people make me sick.
帮我开瓶啤酒 Can you snap me a beer？
那是什么？ What is it？
-这是一个沙鼠.-这玩意怎么会跑进去呢？ It's a gerbil.How did that get in your bag？
我不晓得 I don't know.
邪恶博士 Dr.Evil,we have a problem.
奥斯汀.保威来到岛上 Austin Powers is on the island.
把他带来…活抓他 Bring him to me...alive.
你去 You.
唱吧 Hit it!
这是敏感的话题 This is a very sensitive subject.
我一听到我有复制人 From the moment I heard Frau say I had a clone
就知道我不会再孤单 I knew that I'd be safe 'cause I'd never be alone
邪恶博士就算痛苦也不能说 An evil doctor shouldn't speak aloud about his feelings
我的心事谁人能了解 My hurt and my pain don't make me too appealin'
我希望儿子拿我当榜样 I've hoped Scott would look up to me
继承我的家族事业 Run the business of the family
像他老爸一样地邪恶 Head an evil empire just like his dear old dad
拥有我的爱和全世界 Give him my love and the things I never had
他就会觉得我很酷 Scott would think I was a cool guy
让我尝到当爸的滋味 Return the love I have,make me want to cry
邪恶博士也有人性 Be evil,but have my feelings,too
我也想上上脱口秀 Change my life with Oprah and Maya Angelou
但是儿子不爱我,没办法 But Scott rejected me,c'est la vie
生命很残酷,世界不公平 Life is cruel,treats you unfairly
所以连上帝也疯狂 Even so,a God there must be
把迷你咪送给了我 Mini-Me,you complete me
只有你和我 Just the two of us
我们可以尝试 We can make it if we try
只有你和我 Just the two of us
城堡建筑在天空 Building castles in the sky
你和我 You and I
你塞得还真紧 You've got this packed really tight.
你没事吧？ Are you OK？
我只是背有点抽筋 Yeah,I just got a bit of a back cramp,that's all.
继续塞吧 Just keep packing it in.
天啊 God.
我找到炸药,帮我测试一下 I found the explosives.Help me check them.
你们被包围了,丢下武器 You're surrounded! Drop your weapons!
手举起来 Hands up!
走吧 Move out!
再过几分钟 Ladies and gentlemen,in just a few moments...
我们就要把雷射炮送上月球 we're going to place a giant Laser on the moon.
我会从死星毁掉每个城市 From my Death Star I will destroy every city on the planet.
给我进去 Get off of me.
大贱谍先生,爱高小姐 Ah,Mr.Powers,Ms.Shagwell...
欢迎光临我的火山洞 welcome to my hollowed-out volcano.
这是肥霸 This is my associate Fat Bastard.
菲嚐,你们应该见过面 Felicity,I think you two may have already met.
很不幸 Unfortunately.
我让你爽歪歪,你却不谢我？ Is that all the thanks I get for the night of hot sex？
我很威猛,你逊毙了 I'm dead sexy.You were crap!
你少作白日梦了 In your dreams.
菲嚐才不会跟你上床 Felicity would never sleep with you.
对不对？ Right？
我是情报员,必须不择手段 I did what I had to do.I'm a secret agent.
什么？ What？
肥霸,够了 All right,that's enough,Fat Bastard.
虽然我很爱看保威痛苦难堪 As much as I like seeing Powers in agony and I do--
想到你光着屁股就恶心 the thought of you naked is just gross.
你阻止不了我了 You can't stop me now,Mr.Powers.
我有你的魔酒 I have your mojo...
我要把它带到月球 and I'm taking it with me to the moon.
把他们关起来 Put them in a jail cell.
我的魔酒,我会要你好看 My mojo! I'll get you,Dr.Evil!
是吗？我好害怕哦 Look at me,I'm shaking in my little space boots.
把我的魔酒还给我 I want my mojo!
你有够天才 Great plan,Einstein.
他们一定会骗倒守卫逃走的 You're gonna put him in a cell with one inept guard and they'll escape!
你每次都犯这个错 God,you do this every time!
史考特 You know,Scott...
我当了三十年的邪恶博士 I've been a frickin' evil doctor for thirty frickin' years,OK？
相信我,好吗？ Cut me some frickin' slack.
你忘了,这是座火山 You forget,Scott,we're in a volcano.
到处都是熔浆 We're surrounded by liquid hot magma.
你在画什么？ What are you drawing？
只是张道别卡片 It's just a good-bye card,that's all.
真可爱 It's sweet.
"去死吧,史考特"
抓住那小宝宝 Hey,get him.Get the baby!
退后 Back off.
冷静点 咬死他 Simmer down.Simmer down.
他是我的最佳拍档 He's my posse.
好好照顾他,他很特别 You take special care of him.He's my special boy.
注意,准备发射 Attention,prepare for launch.
全体人员各就各位 Repeat,all technicians to launch position.
各位,我要登陆月球 Gentlemen,I'm about to go to the moon.
启动发射程序… Initiate pre-launch sequence.Main rocket engines,ignition.
法罗,倒数计时 Frau begin the countdown.
5…4…3…2… Five...four...three...two--
从30开始倒数 Frau! Begin the countdown at thirty.
30…29…28…27… Thirty!twenty-nine...twenty-eight...twenty-seven...
26…25…24…23… twenty-six...twenty-five...twenty-four...twenty-three...
22…21…20… twenty-two...twenty-one...twenty...
19…18…17… eighteen...seventeen...sixteen...
16…15…14…13… nineteen...fifteen...fourteen...thirteen--
这样吧,门一关就喊发射 You know what？ When the doors close just say Go.Better.
发射 Go!
上校,你最好来看看 Colonel,you better take a look at this radar.
那是什么？ What is it,son？
不晓得,好像是很大的… I don't know,sir.But it looks like a giant--
-老二 -干么？ -Dick! -Yeah？
你看看 Take a look out of starboard.
天啊,好像很大的… Oh,my God,it looks like a huge--
-小鸟 -在哪儿？ -Pecker! -Oh,where？
不是小鸟啦,好像是谁的… Wait,that's not a woodpecker.It looks like someone's--
二等兵 Privates!
我们发现不知名飞行物体 We have reports of an unidentified flying object.
一根长长的,还有… It is a long,smooth shaft,complete with--
两坏球!那是什么？ Two balls! What is that？
好像很大的… That looks just like an enormous--
弟弟,专心听课 Wang! Pay attention.
我看到一个很大的… I was distracted by that enormous flying--
威利,那是什么？ -Willie...-Yeah？ -What's that？
那看起来好像… Well,it looks like a giant--
-小强？ -是的 -Johnson？! -Yes,sir.
赶快通知英国情报局 Call British Intelligence and let them know about this.
我们该怎么办？ What do we do？
你再去搞肥霸呀 Why don't you just shag Fat Bastard again？
现在不要吃这种飞醋 This is no time to get jealous.
你是怎么做的？ How could you do it？
我只是尽职 I was just doing my job.
我是说,你到底怎么跟他做？ No,I mean literally,how could you do it？
他那么肥,这是不可能的任务 The man's so fat the sheer mechanics of it are mind-boggling.
你失去魔酒,别把错怪我头上 Don't lay your hang-ups on me,just 'cause you lost your mojo.
这话好伤人 Ouch,baby.
好痛哦 Very ouch.
我们没有时间了 Look,Austin,we're running out of time.
对不起 I'm sorry.
我以为你一定能够谅解 I just did what I thought you would do in the same situation.
我是因为你才当上情报员 You're the reason that I became a spy.
我以为我想效法你,后来才发现 I thought I wanted to be you,but then I realized that...
我想跟你在一起 I want to be with you.
真的吗？ You do？
真的 yes
等一下 Hang on,baby.
这件事以后慢慢说 We should talk about this later.
我们得先撂倒那个蠢守卫 First we need to get past that one inept guard.
我有个计划 Right,here's the plan.
我假装食物中毒,大喊大叫 What if I pretend to be ill with food poisoning？
守卫就会过来看我 The guard,drawn by my cries of pain,comes to investigate.
这时你就挖个洞 Meanwhile,you dig a pit...
底下铺满削尖的牙刷 line it with makeshift punji sticks made from sharpened toothbrushes.
等守卫跌下去我们就逃走 The guard falls in,Bob's your uncle,we escape.
怎么样？ What do you think？
不错,不过这样如何？ That might work,but what about this？
你喜欢我的咪咪吗？ What do you think of these？
妈咪 Mommy.
他活像个烧卖 What a...burn？
他肯定会被炒鱿鱼 That sort of thing could get a man...fired.
他真是热情 I think he was...hot...for...you.
-够了 -好 -That's enough.-Yeah.
邪恶博士的月球基地
各位,欢迎到我的月球基地 Ladies and gentlemen,welcome to my moon base.
你们是我的月球菁英团队 You've all been chosen to be part of my elite moon unit.
分成两个小组 Which is divided into two divisions...
月球A小组和月球Z小组 Moon Unit Alpha and Moon Unit Zappa.
六小时后月球会绕到目标上方 In exactly six hours the moon will move in its orbit around the earth...
让我用雷射炮瞄准华府 bringing Washington D.C.within range of my giant...Laser.
启动雷射炮发射程序 Begin Laser ignition sequence.
启动发射程序 Begin laser ignition!
Z小组就位 Attention,Moon Unit Zappa to firing stations.
启动发射程序 Initiation sequence in progress.
别乱转 OK,all right.
我只要一张旋转椅 All I asked for was a frickin' rotating chair,OK？
好了,我有点怕 Getting a little afraid.
我最好把大法师找来 I need an old priest and a young priest.
以耶稣基督的力量… The power of Christ compels you.The power of Christ compels you.
我被转得头晕脑胀 Sick as a dog now.
我好想吐 Gonna vomit.
我们得登陆月球 We need to hitch a ride to the moon,baby.
阿波罗十一号准备发射 Apollo Eleven is good to go.
各就各位 Crew to all stations.
五秒后发射 We will have liftoff in T minus five seconds...
4…3…2… four...three...two.
升空 We have liftoff.
阿波罗十一号向月球飞去 Apollo Eleven has cleared the tower and is heading for a rendezvous with the moon.
启动雷射炮 Arm the"laser.
启动雷射炮 Arming the laser!
注意,启动死星 Attention,arming the Death Star.
雷射炮启动了 Battle stations.Laser on!
全体人员就作战位位 All crew at battle stations.
接上美国总统 Get me the president.
你一定会喜欢的 You're gonna like this part,Mini-Me.
我们要威胁世界领袖 This is the part where we threaten the world leader.
我们每次都这样,不过… I know we do it every time,however it is important to--
迷你咪？ Mini-Me？
迷你咪,你在哪儿？ Where are you？
下次在他身上装个铃铛 Can someone put a frickin' bell on him or something？
太好了！ Great!
这下好了,去拿根棍子 Somebody get the stick.
抓住勾子,好吗？ Just grab on to the hook,all right？
最佳拍档,我爱你 You complete me.I love you.
撑着点 Hang in there,Mini-Me.
要是你出事我该怎么办？ If anything should happen to you,I don't know what I would do.
我大概会再做个复制人 I'd probably move on,get another replica.
不过也会伤心个十分钟吧 But there'd be a ten-minute period there when I would just be inconsolable.
我们筹到钱,很不容易 We have your money,Dr.Evil,but it wasn't easy.
爸爸要做事了,OK! Papa has to do some work,OK？
半小时后交给我 Well,you have exactly thirty minutes to get it to me.
拜了 Ciao.
可恶,我们真要付钱吗？ Jiminy jumpin' Jesus,I can't believe we're gonna pay that madman.
咱们有核弹,让我把他轰掉 I got nukes up the ying-yang.Just let me launch one,for God's sake.
你要把月球轰掉？ Are you suggesting that we blow up the moon？
你会怀念月球吗？你会吗？ Would you miss it？
控制中心,大帅哥登陆月球了 Mission control,the swinger has landed.
气闸,打开. Airlock,open.
再加压. Re-pressurize.
快去找邪恶博士 Let's find Dr.Evil.
享受你的月球之旅. Enjoy your stay on the moon.
他在那儿 There he is.
我在后面掩护 I'll cover your rear.
不,你先走 No,you go ahead.
这次是私人恩怨 This time it's personal.
住手,我受不了了 No more.I can't take it anymore.
握手言和 Peace？
我的眼镜,你真好心 You brought my glasses.Bless your little heart.
这样是不对的 Well,that's not right.
住手,我要发飙了 Don't--That's just-- Now I'm pissed.
后空翻 Judo flip!
可怜的小东西,他好小 Poor little bugger.He's so small.
好像一只小狗 He's like a dog or something.
真可怜 Poor little bugger.
下去 Get off!
好了 ok
给我出来 Get out of my suit!
好痒,住手 It tickles.It tickles.
逮到你了 Gotcha!
"月球马桶"
"冲出"
可怜虫,我为你致哀 Poor little bugger.I salute you.
秃头,给我转过来 All right,slap-head.Turn around.
我的魔酒呢？ Where's my mojo？
你必须做出选择 Well,it looks like you have a choice,Mr.Powers--
拯救世界 save the world...
或是救你的马子 or save your girlfriend.
奥斯汀 Austin
菲嚐爱高 Felicity Shagwell
别管我,你得拯救世界 Don't worry about me,Austin.You've got to save the world.
把他干掉 Kill him!
发射雷射炮 Fire the Laser.
锁定目标 Target locking.
天啊 God!
调到致命杀伤力 Laser set to full vitality.
无影腿 Judo kick!
没有命中目标
你打了胜仗,却失去美女 You may have won the battle,Mr.Powers but you lost the war.
不…不… No,No
菲嚐,快醒醒 Wake up,Felicity.Wake up!
逃生舱95 Escape pod ninety-five.
我爱你,我爱你 I love you,Felicity.I love you.
我要宰了邪恶博士 Dr.Evil! I'll kill him!
逮到你了 Gotcha!
你射中我了,混蛋 You shot me,you a-hole.
现在我要杀死你 And now I'm going to kill you.
先等一下 Before you do that...
听好了 know this...
奥斯汀 Austin
我是你老爸 I am your father.
真的吗？ Really？
假的,因为DNA查的出来 No,not really.I can't back that up.
是啊,猪头 Right.Idiot.Yes.
其实挺有趣的 But isn't it interesting,Mr.Powers...
你宁愿杀我也不去救菲嚐 that you would rather kill me than save your precious Felicity？
什么意思？ What do you mean？
指挥室有时空机器 Remember,there's a time portal in the main chamber.
你可以回去救她 You could go back and save her.
我这就去 I'll do that.
菲嚐 Felicity
干得好… Here you go
干得好 Here you go
干得好! Good work!
"回到十分钟前"
你必须做出选择 Well,it looks like you have a choice,Mr.Powers--
拯救世界,或是救你的马子 save the world or save your girlfriend.
奥斯汀 Austin
菲嚐爱高 Felicity Shagwell
别管我,你得拯救世界 Don't worry about me,Austin.You gotta save the world.
我选择爱情 I choose love,baby.
等一下,你是谁？ Wait a tick.Who are you？
我是十分钟后的你 I'm you,ten minutes from now.
哇塞,你有够帅 Damn it! You are handsome.
我也这么觉得 I was just thinking the same.
咱们好性感 We are sexy.
咱们是宇宙超级猛男 We are sexy bitches.Yeah!
太恶心了,杀了他们俩 All right.This is ri-goddamn-diculous.Kill them both!
发射雷射炮 Fire the Laser.
你去拯救世界我去救美女 Listen,past Austin can you save the world while I go get the girl？
好,十分钟后的我 Sure,Austin-from- ten-minutes-from-now.
锁定目标 Lock in target.
调到致命杀伤力 Laser set to full vitality.
没有命中目标
来吧.你没事吧？是啊,来吧. Come on.Are you all right？ Yeah,come on.
你没事吧？ You all right？
你还好吗？ You OK？
我问你,三人行不行？ Say,what's the policy on monage a trois？
你真是帅呆了 You are adorable!
你在找这个吗？ Looking for this,Mr.Powers？
我的魔酒 My mojo.
二分钟后自动毁灭 Self-destruct in two minutes and counting.
小心 Watch out!
地狱见吧,奥斯汀 See you in hell,Powers.
不 no
十分钟后的我,要爆炸了 Hey,Austin-from- ten-minutes-from-now! This place is gonna blow.Let's go.Come on.
快走吧 Let's go.Come on.
三十秒倒计时.二十九... Thirty seconds and counting.Twenty-nine...
-快走吧! -我的魔酒 -Let's go.-My mojo!
别管魔酒了 We have to go now.
我没有魔酒就会无能 My mojo.I'm useless without it.
你一直都很有魔力 You've had it all along.
什么意思？ What do you mean？
你打败邪恶博士救了世界 You defeated Dr.Evil,you saved the world...
也一定会抱得美人归 and believe me,you're gonna get the girl.
真的吗？ Really？
等一会儿,来吧 All right then,maybe later.
是啊,来吧 Yeah,come on.
去！ Go!
我要设定到1967年 I'll set the controls for 1967.
跟我回1999年吧 Felicity,why don't you come with me to 1999？
不晓得,六十年代好酷 I don't know.The Sixties were so groovy.
我想见识七十、八十年代 I want to see what happens in the Seventies and Eighties.
七十、八十年代？ The Seventies and the Eighties？
你什么也没错过 You're not missing anything.I looked into it.
只有石油危机和庞克音乐 There's a gas shortage and a Flock of Seagulls.
没什么好玩的 That's about it.
走吧 Let's go.
1999年,奥斯汀的贱窝
奥斯汀,我爱你 I love you,Austin Powers.
菲嚐爱高,我也爱你 And I love you,Felicity Shagwell.
海枯石烂 Wherever we go...
直到永远 there we are.
特别快递 Special delivery.
吓一跳吧 Surprise,surprise.
小妞,你想再爽一次吗？ Listen,missy,do you fancy another go？
跟胖子搞过保证上瘾 'Cause once you've had fat,you never go back.
闭嘴,你这死… You shut your mouth,you bastard...
肥霸 who is fat.
没错 Yeah,that's very good.
在你杀我们之前,我只想问你一个问题 Before you kill us,let me ask you one question.
你快乐吗？ Are you happy？
这是什么蠢问题？ What kind of stupid ass question is that？
我又有钱又性感 I'm rich,and I'm dead sexy.
好耶 Good Lord
你没回答,你快乐吗？ You didn't answer my question.Are you happy？
当然不快乐 Of course I'm not happy.
看看我,我是个大胖子 Look at me,I'm a big fat slob.
我的咪咪比你的大 I've got bigger titties than you do.
我的下巴像是电话簿 I've got more chins than a Chinese phone book.
我有两年没看到我的小弟弟 I've not seen my willie in two years...
都可以宣布它死了 which is long enough to declare it legally dead.
我一直吃个不停 I can't stop eating.
我不快乐才一直吃 I eat because I'm unhappy.
我一直吃所以不快乐 I'm unhappy because I eat.
这是个恶性循环 It's a vicious cycle.
失陪一下 If you'll excuse me...
我想跟一个人交交心 there's someone I have to get in touch with and forgive.
我自己 Myself.
天啊 Oh,God.
抱歉,我撇风了 Sorry,I farted.
肥胖是条不归路 It's a long road ahead.
开什么玩笑,我要宰了你 Who am I kidding？ I'm going to kill you anyway.
旋风腿 Judo chop!
你踢到我的卵蛋 Right in the mommy-daddy button!
谁叫你骂我逊 That's for calling me crap,you fatty.
就算他是个肥霸 Listen,baby,I don't care if he is a Fat Bastard...
你也不该打男人的命根子 you don't give a man a shot in the pills.It's just not cricket.
我在九十年代会快乐吗？ Do you think I'll be happy here in the Nineties？
九十年代也许很无趣 Well,I know the Nineties might sound boring...
不过对我来说 but as far as I'm concerned...
我把最好的六十年代带回来 I've brought the best part of the Sixties back with me.
就是你 You.
等一下 Wait a minute.
你去哪儿？ Where are you going？
"请勿触动"
这时候,回到1969年
逮到邪恶博士吗？ Did we get Dr.Evil？
没有,他坐的火箭好像… No.He got away in that rocket that looks like a huge...
阴茎,男性生殖器官 Penis.The male reproductive organ.
也称为老二、小弟弟或… Also known as tally whacker,schlong,or...
香肠,要香肠吗？ Wiener？ Any of you kids want another wiener？
那是什么？ Dad,what's that？
不晓得,不过它有好大的… I don't know,son,but it's got great big...
蛋蛋,谁要茶叶蛋？ Nuts! Hot,salty nuts!
老天爷 Who wants some？ Lord almighty!
那看起来像我老公的… That looks just like my husband's...
命根子,来见识独眼人 One-eyed monster.Step right up and see the one-eyed monster!
那是什么？好像是… Hey,what's that？ It looks like a big...
伍迪！伍迪·哈里森？ Woody! Woody Harrelson？
帮我签名？ Can I have your autograph？
没问题 Sure,no problem.
我的天,你看看 Oh,my Lord.Look at that thing.
好大哦 It's so big.
我见过更大的,那只是… I've seen bigger.That's...
小弟弟,这只是预防针 Just a little prick.It's a flu shot.
你漂到外太空,可别生病了 You've been in the coldness of space.I don't want you to get sick.
谁欺负迷你咪都不行 It's one thing to attack me.It's quite another to attack my Mini-Me.
王牌大贱谍,我要你好看 I'm gonna get you,Austin Powers.
下次你死定了 I'm gonna get you.
谢谢.欢迎回来.今天,我们正在做一个后续... Thank you.Welcome back.Today we're doing a follow-up...
今天我们要继续讨论,想要统治世界的老爸 to a segment we did several months ago on fathers who are trying to take over the world.
先从史考特邪恶开始 Let's begin with Scott Evil.
你老爸怎么了？ What's going on with your dad？
他想用月球的雷射炮统治世界 Well,my dad tried to take over the world with a giant laser on the moon.
我知道 I know.
我们要给你个惊喜 We have a surprise for you.
我老爸吗？ What,my dad？
不是你老爸,是你老妈 No,it's not your father.It's your mother.
出来吧 Come on out.
老妈？ Mom？
你是我和邪恶博士爱的结晶 Scott,you are my love child with Dr.Evil.
我以为我是试管婴儿 I thought I was a test-tube baby.
他骗了你! Lies.All lies!
妈,我爱你 I love you,Mom.
儿子,我也爱你 I love you,too,son.
谢谢 Thank you.
今天我们学到什么？ You know,what have we learned here today？
没有人能夺走你的魔酒 Perhaps it's that no one can take your mojo.
你得从内心发掘自己的魔酒 You can look around all you want but what you're really trying to find is on the inside.
大家都要相亲相爱 Take care of yourself and each other.
我喜欢九十年代"一个月后" I think I'm gonna like it in the Nineties.
我不知道能这么搞耶 I never knew it could be this way!
我的宝贝 Oh,baby,baby,baby.
不好 Not good
好爽哦 That's good.
菲嚐 Agent
奥斯汀？ Austin
你怎么能这样？ How could you？
我以为… I thought that--
过去的奥斯汀？ Past Austin？
这不算是外遇 Technically,it's not cheating,baby.
菲嚐,我不怪你 Felicity,I can't blame you.
那家伙是大帅哥 The man is handsome,baby!
我们的魅力无法挡 We're just plain handsome,man.
这让我好兴奋,我好冲动 Am I wrong,but this makes me horny,baby.Very randy!
我很肯定,我的魔酒回来了 Well,one thing's for sure--I've got my mojo back.
好耶 oh,Yes
它回来了,你好吗？ It's definitely back.Hello.You all right？
我的血脉贲张 Me spuds are boiling.
咱们来做爱做的事吧 Come on,darling,let's hop on the good foot and do the bad thing.
性爱博士不够看 Paging Dr.Freud.
哈啰,演完了吗？ Hello up there.Is the movie over？
我还在下面痛得要命 I'm still down here and I'm still in quite a lot of pain.
戏院的人叫救护车 Maybe someone in the lobby could call an ambulance.
我好痛 Oh,the pain is really quite severe.
我要做个夹板,来吧 I've fashioned a makeshift splint.Here goes nothing.
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