片名：炮弹飞车 THE CANNONBALL RUN Cannonball
成龙
报告总部 我们还在追一辆黑色的跑车 Headquarters, we are still in pursuit of the black Lamborghini.
你已经追了两个多钟头了 小心被它过了界就后悔莫及了 Car 42, you've been in pursuit for two hours. Another five minutes, and you'll be in Arizona.
放心吧 天塌下来我也要追到它 Yeah, and we're gonna stay in pursuit until we catch him.
上次你也是这么说 结果不是被降职驻守水塘吗？ It didn't take us that long to catch Dillinger.
导演：霍尔·尼德汉
搞掂了 Hi, guys.
- 你迟到了两个多钟头 - 是，不过…对不起 - You're two hours late. - I'm sorry.
你到哪儿偷懒去？ Where the hell you been?
对不起 I'm sorry.
剩下我一个人在 这儿做得这样辛苦 Fuel-injection system... It's driving me crazy.
你先别发怒 我迟到一定有原因的 I'm really sorry I'm late, but one of my hamsters had an anxiety attack.
我飞车赶来，五个排挡也用齐了 谁知遇到一个美女 I couldn't leave him until he was settled down. He was acting so crazy.
她的车死火了 她说她的车头灯有点儿不妥 He ate a piece of tail. And Henrietta wasn't even bothering him.
于是我替她检查了一下 Then he ate his treadmill.
你整天记得车头灯 连老朋友也忘了 They got vets for that. We got other things to worry about.
谁知道车修好了她就不理我了 Hamsters are a big responsibility.
所以说你这个人笨得像一只肥鹅 Let me paint you a mental picture, all right, Victor?
要是换了是我 怎么也不会这样傻 I want you to think of your hamsters as a little army... marching along on a treadmill...
- 最重要的是把她弄到车上去 就在她身边哦 - 哦，就保证没有失 - running their little legs off, running as fast as they can... - making that engine just purr right along the road.
JJ，现在已经过去了 多说也无谓 Oh,j.j. What a wonderful way to put it.
JJ，不如我们想想 “炮弹飞车”大赛吧 Wouldn't it be great if we could share winning the Cannonball with them?
我已经报名去了，你跟我两个人去 由我做主，准赢 That would be a real team effort... you, me, the hamsters and him.
做别的事就行 你想作主那可不行 Don't start with him. I don't want to talk about him.
- 就这一次可以吧？ - 别在这里唠唠叨叨了好不好？ - If you need any help... - I don't want to talk about him.
- 彪叔 - 又想要玩几手？ - Sir james! - Oh, my God. You again?
你近来手气不好 小心连内裤也输掉 Fenderbaum, do me a favor. You're drawing flies. Get the hell out of here.
别胡说了，彪叔，我想问问 Wait a minute, Greek. Only thing I want to know is...
要是我参加“炮弹飞车”的话 不知到时的盘口怎么样呢？ how are you figuring the odds on this Cannonball cockamamie?
你车牌也没有，你要是真的顺利 完成赛事，电算机也爆散了 It takes brilliance and years of hard work... and you wouldn't understand any part of that.
还要什么牌呢 赛车跟赛马差不多 Do me a favor. A race is a race, right?
最重要的是要够胆色，要抢先 The only thing you gotta do in the Cannonball is drive steady...
不要犯规，不要胡来 那就很容易赢 stay out of trouble and have a good cover.
这要从东海岸斗到西海岸的 3,000 miles averaging 85 miles an hour.
你要丢脸找别的吧 小心被人喝倒彩 Do you know what that is?
你看清楚我呀 我生的是冠军相 You want to talk or do you want to bet?
我已经喷了防雷达油了 整辆车都喷了 Anti- radar paint, turbocharged,j.j.
JJ，不要怕那些警察的 保证没事 Nobody can stop us now. Nobody.
你们真胆大 你当自己是什么人哪？ What are you, some kind of nut? Who do you think you are?
你叔叔我呢 就是鼎鼎大名的丁力 I am Captain Chaos.
他就是我的老搭档木嘴辉 And this... This is my faithful companion, Cato.
来问个好吧 Say hello, Cato.
轮到你说名号了 Been a cop long?
真过瘾，我的赔率怎么样？ Funny! You wanna talk or you wanna bet?
一赔九九九 You got 50 to 1.
那你准会破产，我一定会下重注的 两千块，就赌一把，全下在独赢那儿 And you know what you got? You got yourself a bet. Twenty big large ones.
赢了就是两百万 That's a million dollars.
不过，很难了 If you win.
我有个高手助阵 小甸，你认识彪叔的吧？ I don't know if you know my partner. Jamie, you remember jimmy the Greek.
原来是你？他驾了几十年车 Jamie Blake. You used to drive that Formula One...
就算不淘汰也降到下一班了 when high- button shoes were in style.
不过有些事你不知道的 我们有秘密的武器 Let me tell you something, Greek. We got a secret weapon.
就是有神仙与我们同行 God is our copilot.
神仙也救不了你们了 You'll need him.
神仙怎么会同行呢？ "God is our copilot"?
你记得我们的车吗？ Remember our car?
- 只有两个座位的 - 就是两个位 - Two seats? - Two seats.
那他坐那儿？ Where's he gonna sit?
没有位 Where?
阿辉，想赢就要想办法 Listen to me, El Porko.
我们要想到一种车无论 开得多快警察也不会抄牌的办法 We're not in the Indianapolis 500. We can't have a car with numbers on it.
那就可以顺顺利利的准赢他们了 We have to camouflage the car somehow.
那是什么车？ Like what,j.j.?
电车，电车从来就不会被抄牌的 How about a limousine with diplomatic plates?
-不如救火车吧 没有人敢拦住救火车的 -不行 I know. A bloodmobile. They'd never stop a bloodmobile, would they?
不如送葬车吧，送葬车一定 不会错的，人人见了都退避三舍 Ice cream truck! An ice cream truck! You know. They got to get there before it melts. Terrific.
- 没啤酒了，没有真正的朋友了 - 没有就算了吧 - We're out of beer, Victor. - Sorry.
你现在驾驶飞机 啤酒不是你的真正朋友 Take it easy! You're acting crazy since this Cannonball thing!
那就下去买点啤酒吧 I'm gonna pull in here and get some beer, all right?
我想到了，不如我们 借警务处处长的车用用吧 How about an armored personnel carrier? They wouldn't stop that, would they?
不用泊位了，很快搞定的 Hey, don't bother to park. I'll be right out.
想通了开辆什么车 就十拿九稳赢的 We could get a black Trans Am. No, that's been done.
妈妈，今天心情好吗？ Hello, Mother. I trust you've had a pleasant day.
我昨晚做了个噩梦 A nightmare. A living nightmare.
儿子，你年纪也不小了 别再扮007去骗女孩子了 You are killing me, Seymour... killing me a slow death with this idiot spy business.
- 那总比被女孩子骗好 - 你真是离谱 - Mother, you don't understand. - What is there to understand?
四十多岁的人 还是这样乱花钱 I'm looking at my son, Seymour Goldfarb,jr...
你知不知道你 死去的父亲怎么样？ son of Seymour Goldfarb, God rest his soul...
他从16岁干到60岁 日夜工作，完全是白手起家 and heir to the Goldfarb Girdles fortune.
当初在街头拉木头车 And what is he doing?
后来总算也给他开了一间小车房 like he was some goy movie star named Roger Moore.
最后还做了汽车大王，而你呢？ And for this I sent you to the best schools?
就凭着生得英俊 样子像罗查摩亚 For this I'm spending 8,000 on orthodontia work?
就当真自己是大明星到处混 你看 For this I'm going broke paying that Beverly Hills analyst?
这些是什么来的？ And now... this.
居然学人家把枪放在枕头底下 The sleep-in maid found it under your pillow this morning.
你现在究竟想搞什么鬼？ What is the meaning of this?
妈，不怕对你说，这枝枪… The meaning, Mother dear, is a quick death.
是我千辛万苦 向偷渡客买回来的 I warned you not to interfere in my affairs.
把枪放下，很容易走火的 Seymour, put that away. It's liable to go off.
我的枪让你发现了 ，那你真是不幸了 I'm terribly sorry, Mother... but you know too much.
我们做007这一行的，要是一旦 暴露了身份，那就只有大义灭亲了 You see, in my business... even the deepest family relationships aren't worth a farthing.
你真的是疯了 Farthing, schmarthing.
-不要 -真是很对不起，妈妈 Zie gezunt, Mama.
我真是白白养你这么多年了 Where did I go wrong?
谁叫你那么没记性 忘了吃避孕药 You know something, Mama? You're too jewish.
要是我们 在车尾装了火箭的话 Of course, we could always go with a nice, plain- jane Chevy... with a truckload of Sidewinder missiles.
那些警察就只能吸尘 拿我们没辙 J. J., maybe you should slow this down just a little bit.
你说什么？ I can't hear you.
我说白话 你聋了吗？求你别开那么快 I said, you're making waves. You're bothering the people.
开船也那么快，这次炮弹飞车 不用说也是我们赢定了 What the hell does going too fast... got to do with being in the Cannonball?
你疯了吗？ J. J., you're making very big waves.
算你们命大，整条船散了 How are ya? You guys are lucky. You tore the heck out of that boat.
小胖，你怎么样？ - You all right, Victor? - Oh, I'm fine,j.j.
还好把命捡回来 不过十指痛归心 It only hurts when I point.
不知道为什么，跟你在一起 You know, maybe it would've been better...
不是撞车就是撞船 分分钟都会丧命的 if you didn't pay so much attention to those girls.
- 偶然失手 - 你技术太差 - Nobody's perfect. - That's true.
只要有一次的意外 就完蛋了 Nobody's perfect. but him.
- 我的颈很痛，那间医院远不远的？ - 16公里 - How far is it to the hospital? - About ten miles.
是吗？那就是 有一段时间才到了？ Oh, yeah? How long will it take us to get there?
5分钟 About four or five minutes.
救护车可以横冲直撞 不用看交通灯的 You can smoke through traffic like shot through a gun in this thing.
谢谢，各位…我们这个节目
叫做“上床，盖被，做大戏”
我们有请西环老树先生
谢谢各位 相信你们已经上了床，盖好了被
今天的嘉宾就是
日本飞车冠军龙少爷
还有就是 上届影后天天爱小姐
最后一位就是电脑泰斗…文四郎
上了电视…
这部车是我们电脑化最新发明
全美国地图都有的
我们这位…
电脑是…
请你继续下去
小姐 你一定知道怎么用法了吧？
你先坐下
你不要让她乱按那些按钮
老兄，我弄了这部车10多年了
待会儿把车弄坏了你就惨了
龙先生，究竟在搞什么鬼？
那部车怎么会这样的？
四只脚是什么东西？
- 是骆驼 - 我都说出来，还不知道怎么做 - Camel. - Not the Camel, schmuck. Winston.
老板整天记得飞车 没什么别的可想了
这样子开车 骆驼也给他撞死了
看他像舞龙一样 早晚会完蛋的
从明天开始 你们两个陪我一起练车 Starting tomorrow, you and George will be riding in the car with me.
皇兄，你的驾驶技术练的怎么样了？ How goes your driving, my brother?
皇妹，说出来你可能不相信 Allah be praised, dear sister.
现在我驾车 比太空穿梭机还要劲 My speed is rivaled only by the lightning bolts from the heavens.
那你现在是不是打算到美国去跟 那些美国人去争炮弹飞车冠军呢？ And I suppose you still intend to go through that race... with the infidel Americans.
当然啦，我沙特王子 这次一定会一雷天下响的 Cannonball will fall... to the forces of Islam!
他们不够我斗的，我赢定了 My dear sister, I pledge it!
来人啊，倒酒 Drink! Drink!
- 董事局会议取消了 - 知道了，董事长 - The car will be there, correct? - Yes, Mr. Compton.
因为我现在要去参加赛车 Don't forget to cancel the board meeting on Monday.
炮弹飞车的冠军，我拿定了 I'm going to spend a week in Spain at the castle.
记住，替我先发封电报 给我的老朋友麦当劳 I want you to find an old friend...a Mr. Shakey Finch.
说到长途电单车 美国没有人能及得上他，知道吗？ He is the finest long- distance motorcycle rider in this nation. You got it?
知道了，白董事长 Yes, Mr. Compton.
不过，全体董事认为，生意要紧 希望你再三考虑清楚 Mr. Compton, the board has asked me to express their concern one more time.
不要参加赛车 Please reconsider.
没什么好商量的 Not possible, Arthur
要我不参加赛车我就不干 情愿退出董事局 The board will have to permit me this one indulgence...to my ego.
飞…我个人会飞 I've gotta be free I've gotta be me To live Got to be free
比电影卡通戏还要好看，飞… Boy, ain't he something?
有没有搞错，像他这样开车 简直赶到阎王爷那里报到 Are you kidding? That is the dumbest thing I've seen since that dimwit... tried to jump the Grand Canyon.
还在后面追着呢 这位警察我看他是有目的 He's still on our ass. I don't think... I don't think... I don't think he's a brother either.
放心吧，老弟 我不相信摆脱不了他的 Don't you worry, son. I'm gonna lose him up here at the motel.
所谓大丈夫能屈能伸 还是先找个地方躲一躲，避避风头 Hey, I remember. There's a spot... There's a spot right in back...
你看那边，有一间洗车店 and it's a perfect spot to hide.
- 转…转哪一边？ - 转左 - All right. Wonderful, wonderful. Take... Take... - Left. Oh, hell. Take a left.
我什么也看不到 I can't see shit, can you?
好极了 That's... That's... That's... perfect.
他们怎么找也找不到车子 That's better than hiding... That's better than hiding it out back.
我知道 不过这样洗车，真是少见 I know. But the only problem we got now... is we have to go and retune it.
这次可麻烦了，是不是？ All right? Let's go get a beer first.
先喝杯酒吧 Yeah, let's go get... Let's... Beer.
非常感谢各位亲爱的朋友 I'd like to thank Mona Carson of Westport...
今天光临我们 这个改良城市生活的午餐会 for that wonderful combination of hemp sandwiches... and wood chip consomme.
更感谢环境司 派了一位贵宾来 And now, the moment you've all been waiting for.
我想知道你对…波子机有没有兴趣 This is a titty turn... terrific turnout for the meeting.
他去年帮了我们很大的忙 He led the campaign...
他支持我们示威 争取在环头开辟单车专线 to ban the use of electric toothbrushes during peak load hours.
那你今天来 一定想听我演说了？ I suppose you... came here to hear me speak.
不是，你估计错了 我是来享受冷气的 No, not really. I'm into trees.
享受冷气？ Trees.
其实我不喜欢城市生活的 Friends of Nature love trees, you know...
- 我最喜欢的是大自然 - 我们真是志同道合 - so I come to the meetings. - That's very interesting.
喜欢大自然的人最有品味 I love anybody who loves trees.
人在大自然里面才有天然美的 They happen to be a great passion of mine.
- 我时常都有一个梦想 - 什么梦想呢？ - You know what I like best about trees? - No, what?
有一个喜欢我的人 hat you can lie under them... on a moonlit night with the breeze blowing...
跟我一起游山玩水 享受人生 ball your brains out.
现在请莫大毛先生 Mr. Arthur j. Foyt.
莫先生，莫大毛先生 Mr. Foyt.
现在用力踩油门 Give that sucker some juice.
你的车在水里洗了一次，真是不同的 最起码，看起来也光鲜一点 The only thing hiding it... hiding it... hiding it in the pool... did was make it pretty.
你别那么啰嗦了 来吧，用力踩油门 It ain't running worth a shit. And it's wet! I know that.
慢着…我会弄好的 Just hit it one more time, all right? Hold it! Hold it! I know what's wrong.
上一次示威，我们坚决反对 Don't think for a minute... that we in Washington...
广大的市民使用有颜色的厕纸 don't appreciate your Mothers' March...
根据我们的 专家调查所得的结果 to ban the sale of colored toilet paper...
这样可以减少某些疾病，特别是痔疮 to help reduce irritation... of the rectum.
今天我要呼吁大家 But today... I want
针对城市生活的 一种严重的而又疯狂的敌人 to direct my remarks... to an old... and familiar enemy...
那就是汽车噪音 the automobile.
踩尽油门才行 One more time. Let me hear it.
我们男人有两样东西 是不能借给别人的 It reminds me of a poem...
就是老婆和汽车 I wrote.
而这两样东西都一样那么吵的 "The automobile, the automobile..."
- 你没事吧？ - 他们可真大胆，我们不能够认输的 - Are you all right? - They picked on the wrong one this time!
一定要给点颜色他们看看 I guarantee they're gonna pay for this...
我要跟他们斗到底 because when the going gets tough, the tough get going.
引擎没事 She's running good now, buddy.
要不要再喷油？ I still think we ought to paint it.
现在是赛车 不是游行，对不对？ If we're gonna paint it, let's go ahead and Midasize it, all right?
到旅馆了 很多炮弹飞车手都已经来了 There's the motel. The Cannonballers have the parking lot all jammed up.
那么大的停车场都满座 真是IQ低一点也没办法搞定 Man, I can't handle this traffic. Hold on to your lunch pail. This may get a little weird.
快点停车 Slow down!
这里是不是你管的？ You the one running this flea bag?
- 有没有鸡叫？ - 什么？ - Where are the hookers? - What?
我说鸡，会生蛋的那一种 Hookers, man. Where are the hookers?
原来是你JJ Hey,j.j.
- 停车场在那边 -我知道·我的车失灵了 - You probably didn't realize this, but the parking lot's outside. - Yeah, I know. Brakes went out.
- 你的IQ真低 - 低什么？我一面驾车一面玩IQ积木 - You think you're the president? - Well... let me make one thing perfectly clear.
弄到三面同色 这样的IQ还说不高？ We feel terrible about it. And if they can't take a joke...
老兄，这里发生车祸 Thank goodness. We just had a terrible accident.
- 我们已经下班了 - 他受了重伤，随时会死的 - We'd like to help you, but we're off duty. - This man looks bad. Maybe he's dead.
那就叫送葬车来 Then you should call the coroner.
J， 他真是不大对劲 J. J., he don't look too good.
- 他在这儿歇一会儿罢了 - 你快点救他，别在这儿唠唠叨叨 - I think he just had his bell rung. - Can't you do something? You're professionals.
我正在放大假 This is our day off.
老兄，救人要紧 等你放完假的时候他已经去坟场 Will you guys do something? This man's life is hanging by a thread.
要救他，容易的很，喷点神仙水 保证他立刻起来 You have to be scientific. It could go up the nostrils, affect the sinuses.
行了，这不就搞定了吗？ 等一会吃十粒六神丸，保证他没事 There. Don't bother about the bill. Just give him a couple of enemas... and call me in the morning.
- 你好吗？ - 好 - Hi. How's it going? - Perfect.
我要定两间房，要电动圆床 We'd like two singles. J.j. McClure, Victor Prinzim.
有电视看的，我先到酒吧去 I'll be in the bar. I always like a couple drinks right after surgery.
怎么连大堂也泊车的？ I wonder why that guy parked his truck in the lobby.
这里租金贵，我要包下整个顶楼 要不然就替我把整栋楼买下来吧 Only in America. Get me 12 suites. Better yet, the entire floor.
你是未老先衰吗？ Too much couscous.
要是有机会让我碰上那个家伙的话 我一定给点颜色他看看 I would sure as H like to get my hands... on those Hell's Angels who were driving that truck.
我威风起来的时候 李小龙也怕我 But you know, it's probably just as well... because I am a wild bull when I lose my temper.
布鲁士是我的偶像 I love wild bulls.
那我们真是志趣相投了 ，这次碰个正着，是他们了 It's really funny that you should... Oh, my God. It's them.
- 他们是谁？ - 那两个坏蛋 - "Them" who? - Those Hell's Angels.
我看这地方似乎不大对劲 This place is filling up...
人又杂，很混乱的 with some real hoodlums.
- 那边好像有点儿不对 - 没有 Do you see anything weird back there?
我去看看 I'm gonna find out.
我真不明白 ，找个医生有什么难 I don't understand why it's so difficult for you to find a doctor.
那些医生生意那么好 谁会有空跟我们去赛车？ It's very, very hard. It's not easy finding a doctor to take off like that.
甚至连中医 兽医我也找过了 Dr. Gay doesn't even leave his house.
要是连医生也没有 我们的车那儿像救伤车？ If you're going to win and you're driving an ambulance, you need a doctor.
- 你真的找遍了吗？ - 连唐人街中医我也每一间都找过 - What does Dr. Gay do? - He's my shrink.
- 没有？ - 有些回香港度假了 - He was committed yesterday. - Why? He was smoking bananas.
现在唯一的办法就是拼命了 He gets very upset when he talks to him.
那么容易？ So do I.
算了吧，不如你自己去找吧 Sorry. I don't want fruit in my drink.
各位，一起干杯 Congratulations.
祝大家好运，干杯 Here's to you. Good luck.
全是下等角色 想找个像样的也没有 You dumb shits. They haven't got a chance.
看情形很值得下重注 早知道找彪叔下一万元重注的 You know what? I think I'm gonna call the Greek and put another 10,000 on us.
J，那两个女孩子怎么样？ 随便找一个做我们的病人也好啊 What about those two? Maybe one of those beauties could be our patient. Both of them could be.
- 看样子也不错 - 当然了 I could be very patient with those patients.
就算两个一起来也不怕 They're very lick... very likeable.
- 现在让老子去说服他们 跟着我多多学习吧 - 好 - Tell you what. Let's go over there and talk to them. - Okay.
-记住了，快点找到医生 -行了 You just think about the doctor.
- 你们好吗？- 好 - Good evening, ladies. - Hello.
我叫JJ，他是我的搭档叫小胖 My name is j.j. McClure, and this is Victor Prinzim, my executive assistant.
这一班家伙，比黑人物还厉害 I'll do the talking, Victor. Terrorists, my dimpled ass.
你知不知道他们来干什么？ These people make terrorists look like the Sisters of Charity.
来参加炮弹飞车的 These guys are Cannonballers.
那不是比“帝女花”还好看？ What is that, a bowling team?
我们是这次 炮弹飞车大赛的首席热门 As you probably know, we're the favorites to win the Cannonball...
想请你们坐冠军车去游车河 那不是很刺激吗？ and I was wondering if one of you or both of you... might like to ride in the winning vehicle.
那当然了 That would be very exciting.
不过，我们也是来参加赛车的 Exciting. But we're Cannonballers ourselves, thank you.
她们也是来赛车的？ They're Cannonballers.
还有，说到大热门 也轮不到你们 As for the winning vehicle...
我们有真材实料的 we'll just have to wait and see.
真材实料？谁知道是不是 You haven't seen our equipment. Equipment?
别把名字说给我听 让我猜一猜 Don't tell me your name. Let me guess.
- 那我就叫你美女吧 - 你真会说话 - I'll just call you Beauty, okay? - That's nice.
请坐 Sit down.
- 你是鱼蛋飞车手？ - 是炮弹飞车，炮弹 - Are you one of those volleyballers? - Cannonballers. No.
- 过奖 - 你为什么穿成这样子？ Why are you dressed like that?
我喜欢装帅，我爸爸很多钱 我不用干活的 Humanitarian reasons. I'm a wealthy philanthropist.
有空就驾着救伤车四处看一看 Me and my partner ride around in an ambulance...
看到有什么人受伤的就搭救他 Looking for accidents, trying to help people.
我做人的宗旨就是贡献社会 热心公益，服务人群 I don't think we were put on this earth to hurt people. I think we were put on this earth to... help people.
- 你真会说话- 谢谢 - That's beautiful. - Thank you.
- 你一定很浪漫的了 - 有时候吧 - You must be a sensitive person. - I try to be.
对了，你喜不喜欢大自然的？ I bet you're a fan of Rod McKuen.
我喜欢得不得了 I listen to him every night.
我也很喜欢的，尤其是喜欢柳树 -是吗？ I'm into trees. Have you ever heard of joyce Kilmer?
- 你有没有听过柳树开花这句话 - 花？ - She wrote a terrific poem about a tree. - He. Who?
- 柳？ - 你听说过没有？ - He. - He's a she? She's a he.
那你一定听过 “落花满天蔽月光” Well, he wrote a really terrific poem about a tree.
好像听过 “将柳荫当作芙蓉障” You know what I like best about trees? No, what?
两句词加起来就是 柳树开花的意思 That you can lie under them on a moonlit night... the leaves gently blowing in the trees...
- 真对不起 - 不要紧 - Sorry. - It's all right.
- 你刚才说道… - 是，我常常也有这样一个梦想 - What were you saying about trees? - I was saying, what I like best about trees...
跟一个心爱的人游山玩水 听听柔和的音乐JJ is that, on a moonlit night you can lie under them... with the leaves gently blowing...
JJ，这件事说出来你也不相信 Hey, j. J., you'll never believe what just happened to him.
- 连我这么一个土包子… - 我不想听 - I don't want to talk about it. - He had the most wonderful time...
JJ，我说的是正经事来的 你听不听？ Do you want to hear about the doc? He's telling me about the doctor.
- 你不是说要找医生的吗？ - 晚一点再说吧 - Oh, it's about the doctor. - It's really important.
我叫你晚一点再说 It'll keep.
我不打扰你们谈话了 I'll leave you two alone.
这件事很要紧的 But listen, I think you should hear... - It'll keep!
- 这件事真的很重要 - 我在和美女谈话 - It's really important. - I want to talk to her.
- 现在你有空了吧？ - 没空 - Now do you want to hear about the doc? - No!
那什么时候有空？ It'll keep.
你好吗？白董事长，好久不见了 Hey, Brad, old buddy! How the hell are you?
麦当劳，我们好久不见了 My God, it is you. Hello, Shakey!
麦当劳，找你可真辛苦 Shakey, it's kind of tough to get close to you.
每次见你你都发福了 Last time I saw you, you were a bit more svelte.
最近生意不太好 那些汉堡包都滞销，惟有自己吃掉 Yeah, well, what can I tell you? In the pizza business, when it's slow... you tend to eat the inventory.
你那么重，怎么参加炮弹飞车？ But that's not good for the Cannonball. You know that.
我怕你把车压扁了 You don't need a motorcycle. You need the Super Chief.
不用怕，就是因为我够重 所以汽车才够稳定 Even with the extra tonnage, I'm still the best there is.
- 麦当劳，这车的排气管有点不妥 麻烦你来看看 - 好 - Yeah? Well, I'll tell you what. I got a throttle that's been sticking. Why don't you fix that?
对了，老板，这是我们 替环境署部门立功扬名的好机会 Boss, this is the biggest coup... in the history of the safety enforcement unit.
我看到炮弹飞车那帮坏蛋 We're gonna blow this Cannonball thing wide open...
要是我们把他们全抓了就可大事宣 传 and then we're gonna hit congress for a real budget... that will allow us to play some real hardball.
说不定还会全体加我们的薪水 你说，这不是很好吗？ I mean, this is our Three Mile Island... and Love Canal combined.
- 什么事？ - 了不起 - What's wrong? - Look at the chicks.
- 你没事吧？ - 真够劲 - What is it? - Look at the chicks!
真后悔扮了神父 现在受了束缚 If we were Methodists... what a shot we could have had of getting laid right here.
行了…我看着他们 待会儿再报告 Listen, I want to get up there. I don't want to miss a thing.
- 弄好啦，试试看 - 这么快？- 当然了 - All right. There you go. Just as good as new. Give her a try. - That's it? - That's it. All right.
让我试试 We'll see.
刹车闸出问题了，这次惨了 Hey, I don't think it's the throttle. I think it's the clutch!
小心点，看着 Look out! Hey, watch out! Watch out!
小心 Coming through!
- 那家伙在干什么？ - 他们在拆屋吧 - What in the hell was that? - That must be the entry of the National Safety Council.
你好吗？我是来 参加你们炮弹飞车大赛的 Good day. I am here to participate in your little jaunt to California.
欢迎，麻烦你在这儿签个字 Well, of course. If you would sign in here, please.
笑一笑 Hold still, Petey. Say cheese.
我罗渣摩亚就喜欢赛车 这是我的个人爱好 I realize the novelty of a major celebrity... entering your little race...
请不要让新闻记者大肆报道 but kindly resist the temptation and keep the media coverage to a minimum.
- 快点…老兄，快点 - 来了 - Will you hurry the hell up? - Hurry up!
我买了许多的啤酒 Man does not live on... on bread alone.
对了，我们光是喝 没东西吃会醉的 What concerns me is, do we have enough ice for all this beer?
虾片 Plenty.
食物呢？你买了什么食物？ Yeah, well, how about food, son. Did you bring enough food?
- 还有这个 - 就这个？都给我 - Plenty. - Will you get serious? Give me the rest of that beer.
对不起，小姐.神父 要是我们再不过去的话，就要迟到 Excuse me, good sisters, if you will. Father, we do have a race to run, and we're running a little late.
记住，只管去爱 Don't run off. Tonight's the night.
欢迎各位来这儿参加 I'd like to welcome you all...
我们这个最刺激的炮弹飞车大赛 to an event that's sometimes been called the automotive counterpart... to the Bay of Pigs.
今晚的选手 全都有曾撞车50次以上的记录 You all are certainly the most distinguished group... of highway scofflaws and degenerates...
而且还是与警察相斗的高手 为了飞车，各出奇招 ever gathered together in one place.
还利用各种方法装模作样 We're gonna have fun.
不过，美国有成千上万的交通警察 已经准备就绪与我们一较高下 Of course you know certain skeptics note that perhaps 10,000... of the nation's most elite highway patrolmen... are out there waiting for us after we start, but let's think positively.
其实你们不用怕 因为美国没有一个州 Think of the fact that there is not one state in the 50...
对驾驶超速是判死刑的 that has the death penalty for speeding.
但我不清楚俄核俄州的法令 Although I'm not sure about Ohio.
这次的计时方法 Everybody is gonna get a card like this.
就是每一部车 还要在这里打卡出发 When you leave, you're gonna punch out here at this time clock.
在你的汽车到了 5000里的终点后 Three thousand miles away from here...
要再打一次，那就知道谁最快了 我们是以时间分胜负的 is another time clock just like that at the Portofino Inn. The difference between the two times is your time across the country.
大会的记录是32小时51分 The record stands at 32 hours and 51 minutes.
当然，这个时间是 绝对不符合交通安全规则的 Believe it or not, those guys did break the 55 mile an hour speed limit.
别说那么多了，开始好啦 现在我们请排第一汽车开始比赛 Let's get that first car up here. We're gonna get this thing underway.
- 医生在哪里？ - 我全都准备好啦 - All right. Where's the doctor? - I got everything else.
- 找到医生没有？ - 电油也注满了 - Where's the doctor? - I got 60 gallons of gas...
- 别罗索，我问你找到医生没有？ - 连车胎也入满气了 - Can you read my lips? Where is the doctor? - The auxiliary tanks...
有没有搞错 这么简单的事也无法弄好 Goddamn it, I gave you one responsibility... to get a doctor. You give me no doctor. Where is he?
别整天骂我 He got sick.
还有时间，你再找找 Listen to what I'm telling you. You go find a doctor.
基瓦格医生也好 昆西医生也好 Get me Dr. Kildare. Get me Dr. Livingston. Get me Dr. Frankenstein. Just get me a doctor.
- 随便替我找一个回来 - 他们会在哪里？ - Go where the doctors hang out. - Where is that?
- 晚上，你想医生会跑到那儿去？ - 酒吧？还是夜总会？ - Bars, golf courses. - Golf course, bar. All right.
- 对了，护士宿舍 - 试一试吧 - Where else? Hospital! - Try that too.
怎么样？想不想做沙特太子妃？ My jet will take you to California.
请你快点打卡吧 It's time for you to punch out.
你跟着我，我给石油你冲厕 我爱你们 I'll see you in California! I love you! A toast to us, you and me.
- 我们赢定了 - 当然 - We're gonna win the whole thing. - It's a cinch.
你看看，周围都是小角色来的 The more I look around and see these turkeys...
在救护车前面的两个人 不就是JJ和小胖吗？ While you're drinking, that truck to the left... Isn't that j.j. McClure?
不用怕他的 He's nothing.
他有点不正常 整天在装模作样 Don't worry about him. It's the blimp next to him. The blimp.
这胖子这样傻里傻气 看样子，做事总是弄砸的多 When he puts on that mask, he'll blow your goddamn doors off.
我这个眼镜好不好看？
你这个眼镜黑漆漆的 你扮瞎子吗？
电脑控制什么都看到的
他妈的日本鬼子 Was that weird?
你快点把车牌记下来吧 小心听我说 It's a Nevada license plate... and that's...
1…4..6… whiskey, zebra, alpha... niner, fiver, zero.
- 怎么样，写好没有？ - 什么？ - You got that? - What?
我的意思是说，160 Just write W-Z-A... No, here.
我写给你看 Will you let me do it? W-Z-A-9-5-0.
-这不就是160了吗？ - 对了 See? Whiskey, zebra, alpha, niner, fiver, zero.
你吃了这颗白凤丸 我们就可以起程了 Okay, so it's Interstate 80 through Pennsylvania.
这部车，真是不简单… Oh, that's a good looking piece.
你们驾着这部这么威风 这么神奇的车到处乱闯 And cunningly disguised so it won't look like a racing car.
是不是怕那些警察看不到？ You know, the cops would never give that a second glance.
我们这么快 就算警察看到也追不到 Two hundred and twenty miles an hour, and they won't get a second glance.
可不可以把你们的电话号码给我？ 有空可以打打麻将 Hey, when we get to California... I got a place out at Palos Verdes...
你们两个是不是要 喝到肚子也大了，才愿意开车？ You boys gonna start this thing or just sit and wait for that paint to dry?
- 什么时候可以休息？ - 明早吧 - How long till we stop? - Eight hours.
惨了，小便也没有空 Damn, I gotta go to the john.
伙计，我们没有 那么笨有捷径也不走的 Mad Dog, you are gonna take the shortcut to the interstate, aren't you?
当然没那么笨了 We're here to win, ain't we?
我跟你IQ一流，加起来就是双辣 If you're gonna be a bear, be a grizzly.
- 你看，这样做怎么行呢？ - 他们驾进树林里很浪漫，很迷人 - My God, Pamela. Did you see that? - They drove right through those trees.
我真喜欢 I love trees. Did I tell you...
不如我们进去看看是否开天体会 好吗？你坐好，祖师爷出马了 We are going right down there and bring this thing to a screeching halt...right now. Buckle up. We're going into action.
麻烦你了 Would you mind?
- 怎么连车头灯也不开？ - 够情调 - Very civil. - Might be easier with your lights on.
你是神父吗？为什么 还引诱我们去打卫生麻将？ - Why advertise? Wait a minute, Father. - What?
你们太孤陋寡闻了，神父也有新浪潮 的 That's a no-no. Haven't you heard? They haven't allowed that for 2,000 years.
- 走开吧，老头 - 那算了吧 - It's nothing at all. - Keep flying, Father.
你们真是不会后悔的吧？ How about just one of you?
叫我扮新娘也没用 Who says cops won't stop honeymooners?
开快车一样会被抓的 Anyhow, why do I have to be the bride?
别吵了，快打卡吧 - 慢着，让我先把头盔戴好 - Shut up, sweetie, and punch the clock. - Okay, go slow until I get my wig
大情人，我们可以出发了吧？ Well, old pal of mine, are we all set for California?
- 错误的第一步，下次别再扮神父了 - 你说怎么办就怎么办，我们好朋友 - Next time, Methodist. Methodist! - All right, pal of mine. Okay, okay. You're all right.
- 对了，究竟谁来驾驶？ - 你来吧… - Okay, now, who's driving? - You are. You're driving.
我没有驾驶执照的 -那我来？ - I can't drive. - Then I'm driving.
- 你是一流的赛车手，你来驾驶 我在旁边做指挥 - 那好吧 - Yeah, I think you are. - All right. Put me down.
让我先进去 You hold this. I'll get in the car.
你的帽子 Somebody's hat!
拿着我的酒 Hold my drink.
开车 Hit it!
上帝保佑你 Thank you, good sisters.
快点离开罪恶的世界 到天堂干活 May the good Lord take a liking to you, but not too soon.
多念点经吧 Bless you, my children.
他们两个比醉拳还醉 Those guys are more juiced up than that Ferrari.
- JJ，我找到医生了 - 在哪里？ - J. J., wait. I got the doc.
- 医生在救护车里面，来 - 你真是的 - Terrific. No, wait. He's in the ambulance. This way.
- JJ，你不知道我多么辛苦 想尽办法才找到他 - 那么机灵？ - Before I open this, don't get your hopes up too high. I was pressed for time. - No problem.
开玩笑？ Holy shit!
幸会，朋友，我是变形侠医 我很有名 I'm honored, sir. I'm Doctor Nicholas...
我专医痔疮和一切风流病 Nickolas Van Helsing, professor of proctology... and other related tendencies.
我不是自夸 我跟了一个拜神婆八姑 Graduate of the University of Rangoon...
学了2年零3个月 and assorted night classes...at the Knoxville, Tennessee, College of Faith Healing.
要是这样，这次可真是大材小用了 You may be a little overqualified for this job.
家伙带齐了没有？ You got your equipment with you?
我随身带备干活用具的 I never go anywhere without it.
不过，我治病跟人家不同的 我通常用手指 However, in my particular line of work, I seldom need more than this.
或者是针 Or this.
我慢慢再跟你算账 We'll talk about this later.
朋友，我现在已经来了 Now, sir, before we commence this odyssey...
而你也盘问过我 知道我不是冒充的了 which I understand will carry us across this grand nation... from sea to shining sea...
那应该跟我谈价钱了吧？ there's the matter of my compensation.
在这种情形下出诊 我起码要收2000块钱才肯的 I've determined that my services will require... the payment of $2,000.
你哪儿值那么多钱？ 最多只值200块 I was thinking more along the lines of $200.
我是医生来的 怎么可以讨价还价？ Fortunately... my practice allows me a certain flexibility.
比赛快要开始了 After checking my schedule, I find I'll be able to make the journey.
我就便宜你一点 200块算了吧 As far as the money's concerned, you've got a deal.
那不就搞定了吗？ We're off!
我们要走5000英里 ，终点站在加州 Here we go. Three thousand carefree, madcap miles to California.
加州！太好了，我想去那里看看 California, here we come Right back where we started from
一日都是你 又说找一个美女做我们的病人 Thanks to you, Victor, we do not have a female patient in the back...
光会说不会做 thanks to your wonderful Cousin Tessie.
不知警察先追赶那架呢 It's not my fault that she didn't fit in the stretcher.
现在苏丝也被人唱红了起来 Doesn't fit in the ambulance.
起码也找到这个丁医生 I got the doc here, didn't I?
真佩服你，呆子 找了这么一个怪物回来 Don't ever tell me where you got him. I don't want to know where you got him.
- 大爷，我找遍了整个城市 才找到这么一个霉东西 - 别告诉我 - I was just surprised that all the animals there were... - I don't want to know where you got him!
- 好吧，哪就我自己扮病人吧 - 好主意 - Hey, maybe I could be the patient. - That's a good idea.
你？你又肥又大 Everybody would believe you were sick. Don't you believe he's sick?
人家一看就知道你不像病人了 Want me to examine him?
JJ你整天只会张嘴说话 Him doesn't like it when you say bad things about me.
你那么聪明不去找一个回来？ And you know that.
你知道我们没有女病人 Thanks to you, though, we don't have a female patient.
我们现在要去找一个病人回来 And we've got to find a female...
炮弹飞车手 Damn Cannonballers.
你好吗？碰巧遇上你太好了 我的朋友受了伤，他叫… I'm so happy you're here. Can you help me with Mr...
- 莫大毛 - 没问题，我最喜欢救人的 - Foyt. - Sure. That's what I'm here for.
莫先生，从车后面上车吧 Mr. Foyt. Go around and get in the emergency entrance.
快上车吧，开车 Come on right here. There we go. Hit it!
等一等我 Wait, I'm not...
你到处救人真好 真是比伟大还伟大 This is really terrific... the way you guys go around helping people.
我们是想得诺贝尔和平奖的 Next year we're going for the Nobel Prize. That's where the big bucks are.
- 我的朋友莫… 大毛 - 他呢？ - You forgot Mr... - Mr...
他没上车，不要紧，只要你上了就行 Well, we got you. We're batting.500. Nobody's perfect.
这样，我们回头把他捡回来好吗？ Well, I think you have to go back and pick him up.
对不起，小姐 我们没有时间转头回去 We'd really like to, but we're on kind a tight schedule.
我们赶着到加州去 那里有很多的病人等着我们去救 We're on our way to California. You'd be amazed how many sick people there are out there.
救完了他们 再回头去找你朋友吧 They need our help. We could pick him up on the way back.
小胖，帮帮我 Victor, can you help me?
对不起，我不能帮你 我怕他骂我 No, I can't. I can't do anything.
谁？ But he can.
他 Who can?
他？ Him.
请让一让 Excuse me.
医生 Doctor...
这么漂亮的病人也有 My God, the perfect specimen.
JJ，是不是要 看她有没有生痔疮？ J. J., you want me to start the examination right away?
这份真是美差，请躺下吧 - 别这样，改天吧 - I'm gonna like this job. Right here, honey. - No, thank you. Not right now.
最好是把其他的人捉光了 那我们就一定第一名了
我们第一名？
有这样的设备 你说要输也很难了 Of course, man. This took 30 years. They won't be able to see us... the son of a guns.
戴起你这付眼镜 真是什么也看到
因为只有我们看到人家 他们看不到我们嘛
对不起，警察哥哥 I'm really sorry about that... little lapse, Officer.
我不小心才开快车 Normally I drive right around the speed limit.
我一向都是反对人家开快车的 到时速250还说不在意？ We all make mistakes, miss, but 160? That's a little more than a lapse.
有没有搞错怎么突然间所有的疯子 What the hell is going on here? Everybody's driving like maniacs.
我们是最慢的了 I don't know, Officer.
把车牌拿出来看看 Let me see your driver's license, please.
算了吧 What the hell.
刚才那么多人 开快车我都没有抓到 I can't penalize nice girls like you... for a little indiscretion...
要是只抓你们，那可不太公平 with the whole road packed with speed-crazy lunatics.
我装做看不见吧 Here. You girls have a nice trip. Drive carefully and take it easy.
- 是，谢谢你 - 再见… - Thank you. Come back and see us next year. - Bye.
小心点，别开那么快 Take care. Keep it in the road.
别生气，你知道吗？ I don't know why you're pouting.
我们现在穿州过省兜风 很多人想也想不到 I mean, look. We're taking a nice, leisurely trip to California.
听你这样说话真是 连骆驼也给你气直 And we're picking up all the bills. This could be fun. I can't believe this is happening to me.
这不是玩笑 我被你们绑架了 This is not a joke anymore. I'm being kidnapped.
要是你坚持这样的想法 我也没办法 You can call it kidnapping if you want to be rude.
其实是你自己要上我们的车子的 怎么可以埋怨别人，你说是不是？ Just think. We have a professional physician on board... in case somebody gets swamp fever.
全都是疯子 You guys are strange.
- JJ，有事发生了 - 是的，我听到了 - We got company. - Yeah, I hear.
躺下，当自己犯了疯狗症 -不要 - Okay, Beauty, you lie down and be a patient for the police. - Come on. Why?
我不要，我不帮你 除非你帮我… Don't! I'm not gonna help you. You didn't even help
-大毛啊 -对，莫大毛 Mr...
来，让我替她打口针 Maybe I can help.
天哪 Dear God!
不用怕的小姐 就像蚊咬的一般 It's all right, miss. It doesn't hurt. Give it to myself all the time.
是的， 不信的话叫他示范一下 Yeah. He gives it to himself all the time.
示范一下吧 Show her.
害羞什么？ Come on, Doc. Show her.
示范一下吧 Show her.
你看到了没有？ 是不是？不痛的 There. You see? That didn't hurt.
- JJ - 不要搞我 - J.j.? - No, thanks.
-小胖 -留着你自己用吧
警察先生，你好吗？ Hi, guys. What's up?
好什么？ What's up?
你的车开到200里那么快 是不是赶着去投胎？ You guys are running at 120. Your lights are flashing all over.
- 我们赶着去医院 - 那也不用开的那么快呀 - We've got a patient in there. - You were still speeding.
是急诊来的，迟了她会死的 She's very sick.
- 那么，你们现在赶着去那一个医院？ - 加州医院 - There's not a hospital within 50 miles. Where are you headed? - UCLA.
- 加州医院？ -就是，在海边的那间 - UCLA? UCLA Medical Center. - L.A.
加州？ California?
要是急诊怎么要那么远去就医？ This is going to sound like a dumb question, but if she's that sick...
- 这附近也有医院，为什么不坐飞机？ - 我们为什么不坐飞机？ - why didn't you fly her? - Why didn't we fly her?
我们只遵指示来做 其他的你问医生 I'm just the driver. We have to ask the doc.
那好，我们问医生吧 That's a good idea. Why don't we ask the doc?
什么事？病人快要死了 What's going on out here? What is this crude interruption?
这个病人怎么不用 飞机送到加州去？ The patient... Why can't she be flown to California?
不行，她肺膜鼓胀 Cysts on the walls of her lungs.
很危险的 Very rare.
因为飞机在3000英尺 高空气压变化很大的 You see, airplanes are only pressurized at 10,000 feet.
稍有医学常识的人也知道 这个症不能坐飞机的 Anybody who knows anything about medicine knows... that she can't fly, she has to be driven.
可能未到目的地病人 已经上西天了 We couldn't even go through Denver, it's so high.
我们快点回去找莫… Tell them to go back and pick up Mr...
- 大毛… - 是
她在说什么？ Is that lady all right?
她神智迷糊 She's in great pain.
发高烧变得语无伦次 出奇吗？ Causes her to make certain delirious deliriums.
是吃了迷魂药吧？ Sounds like she's on something to me.
别开玩笑了 警察先生，要是在三天内 Let me explain something to you. We have to get the senator's wife...
也不能把MBE太太送到医院去 那谁负责任，你吗？ to California in 72 hours. You understand what I'm saying?
你是知道我们 这些做工的可承担不起 We have to get the senator's wife...
我们真的担当不起 to California in 72 hours.
我们麻烦就大了 We're very close.
算我给你吓到了 但别再超过80里时速，明白没有？ As long as you're in New jersey, I want you fellows to take it easy. You got that?
我们会做的了，警察先生 We sure do.
谢谢你 Thanks a lot.
不知道为什么 现在有这么多人爱好这样 I'm glad there's no cupcakes like that in New jersey.
起码不怕会生孩子没屁眼 You haven't met my brother-in- law Ralph.
刚才那两个警察一定 常常玩IQ积木 I thought that cop was gonna have a cardiac arrest...
- 是啊，玩到变成IQ呆木了 - 算你们两个走运 - Wasn't Beauty terrific? - The lady was splendid.
找到像我这样帅的医生 She should have her picture on the cover of the AMAJournal.
- 怪不得那些医生的名字 改作昆东昆西了 - 是 - I'm sure that doctor's a very sweet man, basically. - Ah, thanks.
起码先给他骗了200块钱 是不是？ But don't you ever tell me where you found him.
对了，他们就是炮弹飞车 那班家伙现在全体飞车到加州去 Ever.It's the Cannonball. It's the damn Cannonball for sure.
他们一见到我 就立刻一溜烟的走了 They blasted away right in front of my eyes. And they kidnapped a girl named Pamela Glover...
连我的女朋友也给他抢了 just like it was the goddamn Red Brigade or something.
所以 我这次一定要捉到他们的 No, I've got them. This time I've got them.
听着 你立刻拍电报通知全国52个州 Ohio? Yes. Ohio has been notified.
叫交通警察全体出动 无论如何，要把他们一网打尽 Ohio has been notified. And Missouri. And California.
要把他们关到牢里边去 没错 We'll get them, and I'm gonna be there to handle it.
对不起，我要赶时间 You can count on it.
我要走了，就这么说了 I've got two minutes to catch my flight.
大婶… Madam. Madam.
去你的，本姑娘今年才20岁 还有很多小伙子追我 Madam? I'm no madam. I'm a decent, respectable woman. I don't even own a house. I live in an apartment.
我现在要去和男朋友约会 Now get off my case. I'm late for my plane.
- 我最初有套片集叫侠圣的 - 有没有人看的？ - After my career in the RAF... - The what?
到处都受欢迎 The Royal Air Force.
- D我想抽烟你不介意吧？ - 随便，再说我的事情吧 - Do you mind if I have a cigarette? - Please, go ahead. They're your lungs.
他们嫌辛康纳利 演占士邦不够有味道 Well, I had a chestful of citations... medals, that sort of thing...
就求了我很久 叫我演占士邦 and then I drifted in playing a rather popular...
你别乱按 Not that one, darling, please.
- 这车里面有很多古灵精怪的机关 - 真的？再说你的那件事情吧 - We don't want you leaving so shortly after the trip has begun, do we? - No, of course not.
这样的，他们拍 第一部007片的时候就找我 Then I drifted into playing... a rather popular character on a television series.
当时我没空 后来我有空应酬他们 It's still in syndication, you know.
谁知道非常的卖座 Puff away.
小姐，安全第一命长久 Thanks a lot, ladies. But I would take it a little easier.
碰着别的警察 一定会捉你们的 Some of the officers up the road might not be as understanding.
真是感谢你，警察先生 谢谢你的提醒 Thank you so much, Officer. We really do appreciate that warning.
我们一定听你的话 有空找我喝杯茶 And if you're ever in Duluth... remember to look me up.
我有你的电话号码 我会约你的了 I got the number. You can count on it.
病人怎么样了？ How's the patient?
还没有死 她的脉搏滴答的跳个不停 She's alive. Looks like she survived the procedure.
你说什么？ 你们两个有没有乘机会占我便宜？ What procedure? If you guys laid a finger on me...
没有 ，我只是轻轻的插了她一下 No, I just gave her a little prick.
一针 With this.
你一吃饱了 就重得连前轮也触不到地 Hey, Super Chief, will you lean forward so I can get the front wheel down?
快点找厕所吧 Stop kidding. I am.
兄弟，快停车，我想祝福你们 愿耶稣搭救你们 Pull over! We want to give you our blessings.
JJ，那辆车有两个神父的 There are two priests in that car over there.
他要我们停车 They want us to pull over.
小胖，神父驾着这么漂亮的跑车 They're two priests driving a Ferrari.
我是第一次看见做神父可以 那么有钱，不知道他有什么办法？ When's the last time you saw two priests driving a Ferrari? Are they taking the bingo money home?
天堂的地那么值钱 神父做天堂的经纪当然有钱了 Oh, no, they're doing the work of the Lord. In a Ferrari, they can just do it faster, that's all.
兄弟，请椄受我的祝福吧 We want to bless you!
- 小胖，我们赶时间的 - 赶时间是另外一回事 - One of the priests is black. - Oh, yeah. They have black priests.
拜的神多自有神保佑 Oh, sure. They have a black cardinal.
祝福我们是不用收钱的 Oh, they do want us to pull over.
- 所谓有便宜不得白不得，是不是？ - 这很奇怪 - They want to bless us. Can we? - Let me get this straight.
话可说在前头 ，要是因为停车输了 You want us to pull over and be blessed...
那就是上帝也搭救不了你了 by a black priest in a red Ferrari? Couldn't hurt.
- 神父，你的跑车真漂亮 - 过奖了 - Nice car, Father. - Thank you, asshole.
神父，你这是名贵汽车 Hello, Father. Nice-looking car.
开名贵汽车容易赚钱 That's what everyone says. He even said it.
每当我们遇到救护车的时候 一定要把它截停 I want to thank you for stopping, son... 'cause we always stop the ambulance...
希望可以替里面的病人祝福 so we can bless whoever's in there... and you paramedics are doing such a wonderful job.
因为经常他们会在 送院途中不治毙命 We're in kind of a hurry, so just bless it and we can go.
- 我要搭救她 - 不要，她平常拜佛的 神父，我看基督不适合她 - Oh, I gotta bless her. - I'm sorry, Father. She's a Zen Buddhist.
- 我从前也是信佛的 - 是吗？ - You're not a Zen Buddhist, so you can't bless her. - We specialize in blessing Zen Buddhists.
你还是搭救他吧 要不然他死定了 On second thought, Father, you want to bless him? We need all the help we can get.
你行行好吧 Just give him a little shot.
谢谢你了 Thank you, Father.
- 干的好 - 过奖 - You're quite welcome. - You did a good job.
麻烦你，神父 Thank you, Father.
这样的老爷车怎么做救护车？ 毁了它 Why don't you take that piece of shit back to the junkyard?
- 我们的车轮 - 没有气了是吗？ - We got a Flat... - And those priests...
-是，他真是狡猾 - 这次可上了他们的当 - Weren't fathers. - They were...
- 真倒霉 - 过来 - Mothers. - Come here. Ah, shit!
至于那个辛康纳利 其实是我的徒弟 International film star...
他的占士邦风度 完全是模仿我的 ruthless assassin...
偷偷学了几十个钟头才毕业的 Casanova, poet, philosopher...
要是我不说 真的没有人知道 You might say a legend in my own time... in fact, you can.
别按那个按钮 这汽车有很多机关的，小心撞钉 Not that one, darling. I'm afraid this car is full of surprises.
- 比占士邦的车还厉害，不会吧？ - 喝杯香槟好不好？ - This is something I've noticed, I must say. - How about some champagne, darling?
前面银色的老爷车听到了没有？ 坐在你旁边的是不是你的女儿？ Hey, little silver four-wheeler... that just flew past me with the good-looking seat cover.
我想今晚请她去喝糖水看电视 Son, back that thing down. You got smokies all over my back door.
你知道吗？ 全世界84种语言我全都会 If you are referring to me...
像这样难听的土话 我却听不懂了 I request that you speak more clearly in the queen's English.
朋友，学好了说话再来泡妞吧 That is, if we are going to converse on this wireless. Bless your heart.
谢谢，干杯 Cheers. Down the hatch.
你想干什么？ What do you think you're doing?
只有一个厕所，我先用 You can't come in here. You're a man.
- 先生，想加些什么油呢？ - 两个一起开吧 - 7-Eleven. How can I help you? - Pumps one and two... hit 'em.
你开玩笑吧，一个是电油 一个是油渣 What are you, some kind of nut? You got one unleaded and one premium.
你尽管放心 She goes both ways.
管它是什么渣， 算是猪油渣我也不怕 The round orange moon pie with the white hat on... he'll pay for it.
我是医生，女人这东西我见得多了 何必那么紧张？ I'm a doctor, and if I may be permitted the indelicacy... you seen one, you've seen 'em all.
你已经去过厕所了 Come on. A thousand miles on one wheel?
为什么还是那么重？ 我撑不住了 We're trying to win a race, not set a record.
我回来了，东西买齐了 - Victor, what do you got? - A lot of goodies for you guys...
真巧，原来这里也有养阴丸卖的 and a Big Gulp Dr Pepper for me.
细细粒，容易吃 像太阳那么温暖 I'm a pepper, you're a pepper He's a pepper, she's a pepper
- 小胖，上车 - 好的 - Wouldn't you like to be a pepper too Will you get in here. - Okay. Here you go.
警察先生 Officer!
你们这里是不是公正廉明的？ Do you take your law and order in this town seriously?
那当然了 Are you kidding?
这样我可放心了 Excuse me for asking.
彪叔 Greek! But...
我的赔率不知现在有没有变？ Would you shut up a minute and listen to me?
好吧，现在让我拐个弯给你看看 -你拐你的弯
彪叔，是我 Oh, by the way, Greek.
要是有人投注在 日本人身上的话，我全部椄受 What's the odds on the japanese team not finishing?
我的病人就是给后面 红色跑车的那两个人吓坏了 There's gonna be a red Ferrari come flying through here in a few seconds...
他们真是过分 这回这病人真是死定了 and the two men driving are responsible for the victim... lying back here in this ambulance.
为什么？ Victim?
他们是露体狂 还有一样令人讨厌的 - A flasher victim. - You want to know the worst part?
- 他们化妆成神父的样子 - 是吗？ - What's that? - They're dressed as priests.
是，真的，他们化妆成神父 到处骗人 I guess they think it's a little kinkier, you know, dressed as priests.
这还了得，让我去摆平他们 Goddamn, that's sick. I'll handle this.
还有，他们有枪的 Oh... one more thing. I think they're armed.
那就好啦，杀了他我就当自卫 Damn, I hope so. It'll give me an excuse.
弄好了，再见 Flashers! bye!
- JJ，你个狗娘养的 - 你们两个快点下来，快点 - J. J., you son of a... - Out of the car, both of you. Now!
把手放好-放…放吧 All right, hit it.
再动我可要开枪了 Hit it? Freeze, or name your beneficiary.
- 警官，你别冲动 - 对了，警官，你一定是弄错了 - Beneficiary? - Officer, I sincerely hope... you're not a Catholic.
我们是好人来的 他闯进了修道院6年 Pay no attention to him. He's been locked up for six years in that monastery...
迷迷糊糊 不知道自己在干什么 and he don't know what he's doing.
何止6年，这次要关你们8年呢 Six years is gonna seem like a summer vacation... when the state of Missouri gets through with you.
黑炭头，首饰藏在哪里？ You, shorty. Where'd you get all that jewelry?
他叫我什么？ Why'd he call me shorty?
叫你黑炭头，小小一块的那些 'Cause you're small. Small.
就是你 S-M-ALL.
我看我们还是绕路走吧 这路上会有很多路障捉拿车手 I suggest you take another route, good buddy. The smokies are getting traffic all tied up on 40...Looking for them Cannonballers.
- 干什么？ - JJ 那些警察这次出尽全力的，怕不 - Yeah? - Hey,j.j. There's a lot of talk on the CB about the roadblock ahead.
你有没有看过古龙的小说？ What do you think? I think we're in deep you- know-what.
即使路上有障碍 The transmission is slipping.
只要心中没障碍，就没有了 And we lost a lot of time because of your two phony priests.
- 这样吗？- 就是 Oh. I'm sorry.
要是照你这样说，心中没监狱 那就不怕坐牢了，是不是？ Listen, if the transmission does hold together... you think we're gonna be able to bluff our way through the roadblock ahead?
我不知道 I don't know.
你自己猜吧， 这事情让我再想一想 Give me a minute to gather my thoughts.
我又有办法了，拖车大哥 看看倒后镜 I gathered my thoughts. Hey, Lowboy! Look in your rearview mirror.
还认得老朋友吗？ You see this ambulance back here?
骑牛行不行呢？ We need a piggyback ride.
这辆没事了，看看这辆 This one can go by. There's no problem here.
这辆车，我先看看车牌号码 Let's just have this one and... that one.
好了，没事，让他走吧 Yeah, that one's okay. Let it go.
很面熟，在那儿见过你呢？ Excuse me, but you look very familiar. Do I know you?
哪有可能？朋友，我们在渡蜜月 Yes, that's quite possible. Is this going to take long?
很心急，我们不能等的 You see, we're on our honeymoon, and she can't wait.
保重身体，算了 Oh, thank God. Normal people!
看你一表斯文，没什么事了，开车走 No, you see, we were just looking for Cannon... It's not important. Just move along, if you would.
- 谢谢你 - 我很通情达理的 - What is this, anyway? - It's a stakeout.
什么时候轮到你 Oh. Bon appetit.
我看快了吧 English humor.
走走，跟上 Come on, guys, keep moving, will you, please?
这么吵干吗？小心露出马脚 Quiet, Victor. You're gonna blow our cover.
JJ，你别再罗索 你这么了得你来干 J. J., this is not a nine-to-five job. I wish him were here.
- 你很累吧？ - 不是，心里有点不舒服 - You look tired. - More frustrated than tired.
你担心赢不到是不是？ Think you're gonna win this crazy race?
我赢定了 Damn right I am.
我坐在这里和绑架我的人聊天 I'm sitting here having a conversation with somebody who kidnapped me.
绑架你的心的人吧？ Who can blame anybody for kidnapping you?
- 原来你是炮弹飞车手来的 - 这些英雄表现不算是罪过吧？ - You gave me laughing gas. - Well, you have an awful beautiful laugh.
现在我连内衣裤也没带来更换 You made me forget my favorite skirt back at the motel.
这是小事来的 买些新的给你 Doesn't matter. You look terrific without it.
你穿什么尺码？ What'd you expect, anyway?
- 这是女人的秘密 - 你不说？ - A gang bang or something like that. - A gang bang?
那我很难猜到 We're racers, not rapists.
- 为什么？ - 什么为什么？ - Why? - Why what?
我是说我很有兴趣想知道 Why all this speed and trouble and risk and...
- 为什么你喜欢赛车 - 够刺激 - I mean, what for? - For the hell of it.
- 你不喜欢刺激的吗？ - 看看是什么玩意 - Didn't you ever do anything just for the hell of it? - I guess so.
我觉得做人不必太认真 My father used to work in the coal mines.
人生就像赌博，输赢无时定 Forty- three years.
有时你骗我，有时我骗你 He was gonna retire.
只要开心就够了 Buy a houseboat.
我喜欢这样 Move down to Florida.
我赞成今朝有酒今朝醉 Fish on the back of the boat and tell my mom lies.
- 你是醉翁之意 - 是的 - He died two days before he was gonna retire. - Yeah.
也许你可以这么说 I guess you just never know.
不过我是真心的 做人最重要的是诚恳 I made up my mind right then.
我是诚心诚意去爱 I was gonna go for it...
虽然将来怎么样没有人知道 I mean, everything I wanted... I was gonna go for it right then...
不过起码这一分钟我是真心的 because you never know when something's gonna happen to you.
你真美 Like talking to you, you know?
你应该明白我的意思了 I mean, it's really nice.
- 对不起，你们想到那儿去呢？ - 我们？我们刚刚烟瘾起，想去买烟 - Excuse me. Where are you guys going? - We're just out looking for a pack of cigarettes.
这么大烟瘾 竟然穿过几个州来买烟 With North Carolina plates... you're driving to Missouri for cigarettes?
- 喝一瓶啤酒吧 - 你们两个可真胆大 - How about a beer? - How about the fact that your paint job is coming off?
兄弟，把他们拉回去 You want to take these guys away? The good guys strike back!
是54365，好了，没事了，走吧 What is that? Five, eight, three... Five, eight, three, six...Hold on. Hold on. Let it go. Come on.
快点，别挡着后面的车 Come on, guys, keep moving, will you please?
先生，究竟有什么不对？ Howdy, sir. What seems to be the problem?
你别装蒜 我决定要把你们全抓回去 You guys didn't really think you'd get away with this, did you?
我看很难，现在全世界的车手 都知道你在这儿设了路障 We're gonna get the whole lot of you now. Not here, you won't. The word is out about your little roadblock.
这么容易抓到我们的吗？ They're talking about it all up and down the "superslab."
别说那么多了 你们两个快点下车吧 Get these traitors out of here, will you?
中看不中用 Think you're so big.
你们快点过来帮忙把车推到一边 Do some of you people want to come over and push this thing out of the way?
我先把车熄火 Come on. I'll put it in neutral.
糟了，停住它 Who did that? Make it stop!
麻烦你了，一路顺风 Thanks a lot! Keep on truckin'!
老兄 我这机器已经弄了30多年了 Hey, George, you remember the good old days before they got radar in?
那些洋鬼子做梦也想不到 我们有这么厉害的武器 We used to chase speeders? Yeah. This is really boring.
想当年没有雷达的时候可真惨
想抓快车也很难 -对，现在可舒服了
他们这次没我们办法的了 是吗？
我30多年的功夫你可不要小看
<前方有雷达>
警察在前面…
管他什么警察 -我现在见到他们
他们见不到我
我拍你们的照还差不多 再见
- 什么东西？ - 250里的时速，不知道是什么 - What the hell was that? - I don't know...
- 这班呆子 - 笨得要命
我们这次真是厉害 but whatever the hell it was, it was doing 125.
我第一次送外卖的 也算给足面子了 That's the first time we took an order by phone.
没办法了，我要保持225里的时速 所以要用电召方式了 It was hard to understand you. When I called you, I was doing 140 miles an hour.
我们驾驶长途车 最重要的就是吃东西 That was six lamb burgers, four shish kebabs... a side order of couscous...
和喝奶 and two milk.
- 多少钱？ - 6.75美圆 - No! How much? - Six seventy five.
好吧，你拿去用吧，不用找了 Here, my desert blossom.
你这么漂亮要 送外卖真是太可惜了 Keep the change. Have you ever considered joining a harem?
我很喜欢你 我封你做太子妃 I shall return for you after the race.
这是聘金，我赛完车 以后回来一定找你，就这样吧 Get a physical. I shall return, my little fig. I love you!
小胖，我很想问你一个问题 I don't know how to ask you this, but...
是不是肥胖的人，真的很笨重？ 一点冲劲也没有？ isn't it a little strange having that guy... running around inside your head?
据我调查所得 像我这样肥胖的人满街都是 He's not in here. He's out there somewhere, helping people.
像我这样厉害的，就只有我一个 He's always helping people. He'd help you.
真的？ He would?
不骗你 He likes you.
你真的很厉害 你有什么方法证明呢？ How did he find you? I mean, how did you two get together?
很多朋友都这么说 要是你不相信的话，可以问… Well, when I was real young... I didn't have any friends like I do now.
JJ的，你问问他 Like j.j.
我们以前常常在学校门口搭妞的 One day I was in the schoolyard... and nine guys were beating me up pretty good.
他可斗不过我，真过瘾 There he was.
- 他真的斗不过你？ - 真的，屡试不爽 - Captain Chaos? - Yeah. Out of the blue!
- 我很威风，又厉害，又够劲 - 真是威风八面 - I sure was grateful. - That's great!
是，桃花运到想推都推不走 Nobody bothered me at school after that.
那你现在有没有走桃花运呢？ I wish I had a friend like that.
你认为我有的话，我就有 Well, first you need a mask and a cape.
- 这些事大家心照吧 - 不过我嫌你不够胆色 - I think I'd like mine to be pink. - Almost everything I wear is pink.
- 你就是说我可以… - 你真的不明白？ - Everything? - Even...
不明白 I don't wear any.
小胖，我想成为你的朋友 挺喜欢你的 I'd like to be your friend... 'cause I like you.
- 我也喜欢你 - 谢谢 - I like you too, Beauty. - Thank you.
我把电脑开动 就可以知道我们在哪儿了
那当然了，你的电脑了不起嘛
你先看看吧，这是新墨西哥州 New Mexico.
- 墨西哥？ - 是 - Texas? - Stupid!
让我来应付吧 I'll take care of this one.
怎么样，婊子？ Hello, hot pants.
- 老实说，你是不是要和我比身材？ - 当然不是了 - I don't suppose you have a driver's license... tucked down in there somewhere, do you? - Yes, Officer.
- 那警察追着我们想叫我们停车 - 不问都知道他是嫌我开车太快 - That policeman seems to want us to stop, darling. - Yes. He must be rather upset with our rapid rate.
他完全不懂得欣赏英雄作风 Funny. They don't have any sense of humor about that sort of thing.
- 那你还不快点停车？ - 我不停 - Aren't you going to pull over? - I'd rather not.
你替我把右边第二个钮按一下 ，等一会就有戏看了 Can be such a bore, talking to those chaps. Tell you what. We'll just slip away. Hit that button, will you?
像占士邦一样 Like in your movies!
让他们尝尝汽油的滋味 And now a little oil, right, darling?
- 真行，占士邦就是占士邦 - 小菜一碟 - Well, well. We are full of tricks, aren't we? - It's all part of my business, really.
对了，我记得从前有一部电影. I've been meaning to ask you, darling. What movie... Wait a minute.
- 糟了， 你看不看得到路？ - 没问题 - Can you see where you're going? - Perfectly.
你搞什么鬼？ This is ridiculous.
这么刺激，好玩吗？ It's good sport, isn't it?
把窗放下来吧 我们快要变成烟枪鱼了 Would you mind rolling your window down, old girl? We're getting done up like a couple of kippers here.
- 早知道我就戴起防毒面具了 - 有烟才有艺术感 - Next time, I bring my mask. - A foggy day in London town.
当一个女人被骗去一切 You are about to witness the ravishment... of a woman who has been abducted.
失去了贞操和廉耻 A woman whose initial fear has mellowed into curious expectation.
这个时候她心中就只有恨 In the morning, she will be set free, unaware of anything...
她会为了报复而不顾一切 不顾贞操，不顾廉耻 except that she has been loved as never before.
看黄色电影？
你看前面的路
整天开车很闷的 看一下不是罪过吧？
你这样失去了冠军怎么办？
我没见过劳斯莱斯会开这么快的 是不是装了火箭筒？ I've never seen a damn Rolls Royce that'd do 140 miles an hour.
- 没有 - 签个名吧 What do you fellas got in that thing?
我来美国是投资地产的，要是看中了 - Stock. - Sign here.
我可以整个 加州的地皮也买下来 I guess you must have misconstrued my remark... about my mother planning to purchase Southern California...
现在我的律师等着我去签字 as an attempt to influence your giving me a ticket, Officer.
今天这么有缘分 在这儿见到你 I am sure that she will still consider keeping you all on...
我会记得你的号码 改天见到你上司 as a member of the Highway Patrol, regardless...
我会叫他连升你两级的 of how shabbily you treated her son.
你留着话跟法官说吧 You might want to tell that to the judge, sir.
我的传票不要了，还给你 This is for you and the judge!
岂有此理，追他 Goddamn camel jockey.
真气人，全都像鬼一样缠着我 Oh, shit. We got a smokey on our tail.
让我想办法把他们摆平 Watch this. Officer.
- 为什么开那么快？ - 我的刹车坏了，警察先生，我没办 - Pull it over. - We got no brakes! No brakes!
有时候老套办法也有效的 Damn "no brake" gag works every time.
糟了，我们的刹车真的坏了 Oh, no! We really don't have any brakes!
不要开玩笑，坐好 Quit kidding, will you? Hang on!
真不简单 Evel Knievel...
就算占士邦也跟你差不多 you've got yourself some competition.
一直向前开，别拐弯 电脑也是这么说的，别反对它
电脑也会坏的 -我们人脑怎么会胜过电脑？
你照箭头的方向就没错了
你别吵，等下拐弯吧 拐到那边去
不转了…
为什么美国的路这么落后的？
都是你了，现在还加什么油门
想不到美国的公路会这样差
我们不用比赛了 车子又动不了
你镇定点，有我在
我有个秘密武器在这儿 Secret weapon.
只要我开动了， 就“呼”一声上去了
看着吧
- 挺好 - 开动全部才行
第二步就来了，1，2，去
行不行的？
镇定一点，一定行的 镇定一点
预备，开火 Ready, fire!
我早说过，有我在 什么都行的
还要等多久？ How long we been here?
我们等了20分钟了 要不是修路，我们早就到了 Twenty minutes. We could have been there by now.
再过5分钟就通车了，谢谢你 We're gonna be open in five minutes, Father.
老头儿 Father Putz.
干什么，臭小子 Albert Schweitzer!
大家都是来 参加炮弹飞车的嘛 I want to thank you for being so sweet and so nice...
现在怎么算？ and telling those people all about us back in Missouri...
大家比赛又不是斗嘴 that we were both flashers and sex maniacs.
有种的就在通车以后再比赛 Well, I just wanted to return the favor...
要是够胆的 咱们就比一比，怎么样？ that you and the chocolate monk did for us back in Ohio.
有没有说错？ "The chocolate monk"?
不用理他，让他说吧 He could say that.
现在做千王最吃香 他看不过眼而已 He could say it 'cause he's riding around with the Goodyear blimp.
- 你害羞不害羞？ - 他们是这样的了，由他们吧 - "The Goodyear blimp"? He can say that. - Yeah, I can say that.
有些人以为自己很聪明 Because if I had the time...
常常古老当时新 其实笨得像头猪 I would take those rosary beads and stuff'em up your nose.
- 你是在侮辱他？ - 是 又怎么样？ - 小心他在上面听到-我可不怕 - These rosary beads? - Yeah. My rosary beads? You're gonna shove 'em up this nose? - Up that nose, yeah.
- 天主会惩罚他的 - 一定会的 - He can do that. - He can do that.
- Y让我告诉你一件事情 - 什么事？ - You take a little advice? - Sure.
你小心报应 Bring friends.
他们才遭报应，小胖？ A lot of them.
早说过你的电脑 是不中用的了 He wants me to bring... Blimp?
还说研究30年，现在车里全是沙 你说有什么用？
沙，沙什么？你自己也有份的 现在全怪我，现在怎么办？
你有没有问电脑 有没有第二条线路？
我问了7次，老兄
这两个也是飞车手 Ah. The bride and groom Cannonballer.
我早说过我的办法行得通的 好啦，现在轮到你显威风了 I told you this honeymoon scheme would work.
热浪似火 - 我们做电影这一行的热惯了的 - Good. Now you wear the wig, sweetheart. - It's hot.
你知道吗？排戏的时候 几十万瓦特的灯照过来 Oh, I don't know. When I was in Egypt making The Fly Who Bugged Me...
连衣服也烧着了 没地方躲的 it was at least 180 in the shade... not that there was much shade.
刚才要是有星探见到我们 一定会请我们去拍戏的 If CBS would have had their cameras there... we'd have made Sports Spectacular for sure.
- 我们刚才简直比占士邦还厉害 - 你是不是想再试一遍？ - We just zoomed right out over that train. - What, do you want to try it again?
有没有搞错 男人大丈夫扮成这样子 Don't you look precious, all dressed up like that.
你看多老土 And wearing a wig too. Ain't he cute?
全是流氓，吓死我了 Those guys scare me.
这里有我在，就算是教父来到也不怕 You just stay close to Moore. There won't be any trouble.
你以为自己像白马王子一般潇洒？ He looks like Gregory Peck in that blue flannel suit.
这位朋友是我的搭档 This is my friend Shakey. Allow me to present myself.
我本人是华尔街经纪 有什么生意的话，好好关照一下 I'm on Wall Street. Maybe we can have lunch sometime.
是不是人肉经纪？ We don't ride on Wall Street.
人黑就没有得医了 Nah, we don't ride on Wall Street.
- 我们过去帮帮忙好吗？ - 我们去帮手？ - Why don't we go over and help 'em out? - What do you mean "we"?
不行，我们去了，要是这条路通行的话 If we do, then that road opens up and you're long gone.
这样吧，你去吧 Now, why don't you?
你最喜欢管闲事的了 You're the Good Samaritan.
不怕对你说 我们真是没有钱的了 Besides, I'm wearing these.
没钱？你骗我的 Maybe you would like to complete your ensemble.
是吗？我有骗过你吗？ Oh, no. There's something else of yours that I want. Oh, really? What's that?
出来 Your ass!
过去看看吧 看情形我要出马了 Well, shall we join the fracas?
你站在一旁吧 给点面子，我是占士邦 Step back, my dear. I must warn you, I'm Roger Moore.
- 你是谁？- 占士邦 - Who? - Roger Moore.
去你的
让我过去把他们打得七零八落 统统摆平 We'll run in there. Knock 'em flat out.
- 然后我们就一起走 你在这里等我，怎么样？- 好 - Then we go. We could still win it. We can do that. - Yeah.
你可真厉害 You're so macho.
谁不怕死的？ Need some help, Father?
有没有弄错？不会吧，彪叔… Give me somebody!
怎么会无缘 无故的改了赔率的？ What, are you crazy, Greek?
等一会，你真差劲 看我怎么打法 How could you possibly change odds in the middle of things?
这不就摆平他了吗？ Hold it. You wouldn't last five minutes in the New York subway.
- 你的针真行 - 这是特效药来的 - That's the way it's done. - Is that good to drink? I don't know. I never tried it.
- 慢着，这边也打一下吧 - 好的 - Hold it, hold it. You wanna try this side? - Yeah.
要帮忙吗？ Need some help?
走开 Will you get out of here?
谢谢你 Thanks, Shakey. Excuse me.
干掉后面那个 Get this guy, Shakey!
- 对不起，神父 -现在这条路已经通了 - 谢谢 - Excuse me, Father, but the road's open. - Oh, thanks.
黑炭头，路已经通了 The road's open!
开车吧 Let's go! Hit it!
- 大家都上车了，我们不去怎么行？ - 我们还要打架嘛
你慢慢打吧
小胖，快点加油啊，快点 - Come on, come on! Faster, faster! - I'm trying.
- 你不是说过你很厉害的吗？ -有时候是的 - Come on, faster! - Drive it like Captain Chaos would.
你是不是吃猪油太多了？ What'd you take off that goddamn mask for?
- 有那么快就开那么快吧 - 你少担心 - I'll try. - I didn't take off the mask. He took off the mask.
我们要赢的 We need him, Victor!
其实跟他打支兴奋针 就什么都行的 I don't know where he is. Very interesting fellow. I'd like to probe his case.
有没有搞错 I don't believe this shit. We don't want him around, he's around.
这么慢，我去喝杯啤酒吧 When we want him, he's not around. I'm gonna get a beer.
到直路再发力也不迟 It's only ten blocks to the finish.
我稍微多加油门 就什么车都超过了 I feel very confident that we will be triumphant.
- 那是什么车？那么厉害？ - 那是“林宝坚尼” - What the hell was that? - A Lamborghini.
- 那不是要输给他了？ - 加油追吧 - She in the race? - Catch it!
再开快点行不行？加油… Will you go faster! Come on!
凡是你有份演出的电影 我起码都看10多20次的 I've seen every single one of your movies at least three or four times. Four times?
我们这次赢定了 排队收钱吧 I think we've got it goin', baby.
一点也不错，这次彪叔一定会输光 Yeah, we're looking good. Greek's gonna pay us money!
我会和我的朋友 说我和左治米顿一起飞过车 Gosh! Wait'll I tell my friends... I was sitting next to George Hamilton!
左治米顿？ George Hamilton?
- 不行了 - 坐好吧 - We got 'em! - We got 'em!
最后冲刺
小心点 Look out!
我去打卡， 打你的头 It's a foot race!
快点，小胖，快点 - I've got the card... - No, give me that, Doc.
有没有人要看医生？有没有？ Come on! It's a foot race! Have no fear! Chaos is here!
小胖，快点 Take it and win, Captain!
有没有人要看医生？有没有？ Anyone need medical attention?
小胖，快点 Go! Go, Chaos!
- 我们赢了 - 他真胆大，居然用诡计，我控告他 - We're gonna win! - It's not a sporting way to win. What do you say, Father?
我一定要抗议 No, it's not a sporting way, it's a shitty way to win.
我们赢了 We won! We're gonna win!
救命，我的咪咪掉下水了 快点救它 Help! Help! Somebody save my baby! He's drowning!
小胖，别理她 No problem, fair lady.
我来了 英雄是要救美的，你不要怕 I will save your baby. Have no fear!
咪咪 你没事吧，真是很感谢你 Oh, my baby, my baby. Thank you. You're such a brave man.
咪咪是我的心肝来的 真被你吓死了 You don't know what this means to me.
J，我已经把小狗救上来了 J. J., I saved that woman's dog.
小胖，你在终点前停步 Victor, we could have won that race.
怎么赢的都变输了 你真没用 You understand what I'm telling you? We could have won!
你以为你这样做很英雄吗？ You understand that? You had to go pull that stupid stunt.
小胖，他说的对 He's right, Victor.
真是傻瓜来的 We are sick of Captain Chaos.
这次我真给你气死了 We are so sick of Captain Chaos we could throw up.
本来跑的这么快 怎么会输的？ So you know what, Victor?
整天扮超人，这次全输了 There's not gonna be any more Captain Chaos.
你没用的，我打死你，打死你 No more! You see what I'm telling you? No more Captain Chaos!
我不理那么多了，总之 Now, what do you think of that? I don't care, because...
只要我可以装模作样的话 我就浑身很舒服的 I've always wanted to be... Captain USA!
这是个苦差事 但总该有人做的，是吧？ It's a dirty job, but somebody's got to do it.
怎么样，谁赢了？ Who won the race?
谁赢了？ What do you get for last?
你们这帮人，搞乱了美国的交通 现在很开心吗？ How do you all feel, now that you have raped the American highways?
- 够刺激 - 真是一流 - Beautiful. Wonderful. - Great.
大叔，你这样气愤对身体不太好的 还是抽根香烟吧 Old chap, I suggest you get a grip on yourself... or better, on one of these.
你以为我不敢要？ I'll take anything.
在我的车里头 有个最新式的打火机 And feel free to use the lighter in my car, Mr... Foyt.
大家准备看好戏了 You wait till he touches that lighter.
怎么没东西看的？ Ain't nothin' happening.
没理由的，借过 That's funny. Excuse me.
莫先生，你用什么点火的？ Mr. Foyt, how did you light that?
就是用这个打火机 Well, with the lighter, of course.
奇怪了 That's odd.
要不是我碰巧要排戏 明年还要参加 I've got a feeling next year we'll do this again.
喝杯酒吧，大家干杯 J. J., didn't we do good?
谢谢观赏