各位,外面开始下雪了 All right! You guys,it's starting to snow.
快看啊,丑陋裸男在挂糖果藤 And look,Ugly Naked Guy is hanging candy canes.
哪里? Where?
哇. 不错 Oh. Well.
真有节日气氛 That's festive.
各位我想介绍一个人给大家认识 Guys,there's somebody I'd like you to meet.
等等…这是怎么回事? Wait,wait. What is that?
-他叫马修,想和他打声招呼吗? -不,我不要 -That's Marcel. Wanna say hi? -No,I don't.
-他好可爱,哪里得到他的? -我朋友贝瑟把他从实验室救出来的 -He's cute! Where'd you get him? -My friend Bethel saved him from a lab.
真残忍 That is so cruel.
为何有父母会将孩子取名为圣地(贝瑟)? Why would a parent name their child Bethel?
那猴子的屁股上长了个罗斯 That monkey's got a Ross on his ass.
罗斯,他要和你同住吗? Is he gonna live with you in your apartment?
对,卡萝离开后家里冷清清的 Yeah. It's been kind of quiet since Carol left.
为何不找个室友? Why not get a roommate?
人到一定的年纪后与室友同住是有点可悲(pathet)… You reach a certain age,having a roommate is just kind of pathet
抱歉,pathet 在梵语中代表很酷的生活方式 That's " pathet. " Sanskrit for " really cool way to live. "
六人行 第1季 第10集 猴子 The One With the Monkey
各位,我今天将唱全新的曲目 I' m doing new material tonight.
我写了12首关于我妈自杀的歌 及一首有关雪人的歌 I have 1 2 songs about my mother's suicide and one about a snowman.
你最好先唱雪人 You might wanna open with the snowman.
-乔伊 -老兄 -Hi,Joey. -Hey,buddy.
-如何? -我没得到那份工作 -So how'd it go? -I didn't get the job.
怎么可能?你去年就是圣诞老人啊 How could you not? You were Santa last year.
某个胖子和店经理上床了 Some fat guy's sleeping with the store manager.
他根本无法逗人开心,这就是政治 He's not even jolly. It's all political.
-那么你扮演什么? -当他的助手（小精灵） -What are you gonna be? -One of his helpers.
就像是脸上的一个巴掌(耻辱),你明白吗? It's just such a slap in the face,you know?
你们打算如何过新年? Do you know what you' re doing for New Year's?
怎么了?新年有什么不对劲吗? Hey,what? What is wrong with New Year's?
你有保罗.无须面对新年带来的压力 You have Paolo. You don't have to face the pressure...
无须急着寻找嘴唇以便在球落下那一刻去亲 ...of finding lips to kiss when the ball drops!
哦,我说得太大声了! Man,I'm talking loud!
保罗新年时会在罗马 Paolo's gonna be in Rome this New Year's.
-所以我将和各位一样可悲 -想得美 -I'll be just as pathetic as you. -Yeah,you wish.
我有个主意,聚餐 I've got an idea. Dinner.
不错,我们可以把他放在午饭和早饭之间 It's perfect. We'll put it between lunch and breakfast.
我不想再听到迪克拉克（新年庆典的主持人）的疲劳轰炸 I'm sick of being a victim of this Dick Clark holiday.
我说今年,我们约定.只有我们6个共进晚餐 I say this year,we make a pact. Just the six of us. Dinner.
-当然 -好 -Sure. -Fine.
我本来希望大家能更开心点的 I was hoping for more enthusiasm.
-菲比,该上台了 -哦,好的 -Phoebe,you' re on. -Oh,good.
各位,回应大家要求 Hi. Ladies and gentlemen,back by popular demand...
有请菲比布菲小姐 ... Miss Phoebe Buffay.
谢谢 Hi. Thanks. Hi.
首先的这首歌在这种时节令我感慨万分 I wanna start with a song that means a lot to me.
我做了一个人,眼睛是煤炭做的 I made a man with eyes of coal
他有谜样的微笑 And a smile so bewitching
我如何能承受 How was I supposed to know
母亲死在厨房的事实 That my mom was dead in the kitchen?
母亲的骨灰 My mother's ashes
甚至是她的睫毛 Even her eyelashes
都安放在一个黄色的小骨灰坛 Are resting in a little yellow jar
当有时天寒地冻 And sometimes when it's freezing
我感觉有点想打喷嚏 I feel a little sneezy
如今我…抱歉,吵闹的男人 And now I Excuse me? Excuse me? Yeah,noisy boys.
有什么想和大家分享的吗? Is it something you'd like to share with the group?
没.没,没事 No. No,that's okay.
如果有事如此重要 你们非在我唱歌时谈论 If it's important enough while I'm playing...
那就重要的足以与我们分享 ...it's important enough for everyone else.
那家伙会带着一本注意事项回家 That guy's going home with a note.
-我是告诉我朋友… -大声点行吗? -I was just saying -Speak up.
抱歉,我 Sorry,l
我告诉我朋友：你是我见过最漂亮的女孩 I was saying you were the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen.
他说…达丽尔·汉纳（影星）…达丽尔·汉纳 And he said that Daryl Hannah...
是他见过最美的女人 ...was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen.
我说我喜欢《美人鱼》中的她 但《华尔街》就没那么喜欢了 I said I liked her in Splash,but not Wall Street.
她没那种硬派气质 I thought she had a hard quality.
达丽尔·汉纳是传统的美 While Daryl is beautiful in a conventional way...
而你散发出高雅的气质 ...you are luminous with a kind of delicate grace.
然后你就叫我们了 Then that's when you started yelling.
休息片刻 We're gonna take a short break.
那小伙拿回家的远不止注意事项了啊 That guy's going home with more than a note.
过来,马修,坐这儿 Come here,Marcel. Sit here.
拜托,没想到他还没亲你 I can't believe he hasn't kissed you yet.
我第6次和保罗约会时 他就为我的胸部取了名字 By my sixth date with Paolo,he'd already named both my breasts.
我分享太多了吗? Did I just share too much?
一点点 Just a smidge.
大卫是个科学家,做事一丝不苟 David's,like,a scientist guy. He's very methodical.
-我认为这很浪漫 -我也这么想! -I think it's romantic. -Me too!
你们看过《军官与绅士》吗? Did you ever see An Officer and a Gentleman?
跟我一起去看这部片子的男友和他是一个类型 He's kind of like the guy I went to see that with.
除了他更聪明,温柔体贴之外 Except he's smarter and gentler and sweeter.
我只想整天和他厮守在一起 I just wanna be with him all the time.
不管是白天或夜晚,还是夜晚或白天 You know,day and night. And night and day.
还有特别的日子 And special occasions.
等等,我知道了 你邀他共渡新年,对不? I see. You're gonna ask him to New Year's.
-她想抛弃我们 -不!不,不 -She's gonna break the pact. -No! No,no.
不…对,我可以吗… No. Yeah,could I just?
-好吧,我已约了珍妮丝 -什么? -Yeah. I already asked Janice. -What?
这是一个约定!这是你们的约定! This was a pact! This was your pact!
我耐不住寂寞,我毁约了 I couldn't handle the pressure. I snapped!
可是珍妮丝…你们的分手不是糟透了? But that was the worst breakup in history!
我没说这是个好主意,我毁约了 I'm not saying it was a good idea. I snapped!
抱歉,我迟到了 Hi,sorry I'm late.
太滑稽了 Too many jokes.
快取笑乔伊 Must mock Joey.
鞋子正点吧 Nice shoes,huh?
我快笑死了 God,you're killing me!
罗斯,他又玩我的铲子 Ross,he's playing with my spatulas again!
-他又不会玩坏的 -你非得每次都带他来不可吗? -He's not gonna hurt them,right? -Do you always have to bring him?
我不想留下他一个人 我们早上才吵了一架 I didn't wanna leave him alone. We had our first fight this morning.
一定是我加班惹的祸 我说了不该说的话 It has to do with my working late. I said some things that I didn't mean.
他就朝我扔一坨屎 He threw some feces.
如果你必须加班,我可以替你照顾他 If you're working late,I can look in on him.
这太好了 That would be great!
如果你去照顾他,要装成一付去找他的样子 But make sure it seems like you're there to see him.
不能让他知道你是在帮我忙 You're not doing it for me.
好,但他如果问起 我可就要实话实说了 Okay. But if he asks,I'm not going to lie.
但我们仍无法测试这个理论 But you can't actually test this theory.
因为目前粒子加速的速度 T oday's particle accelerators aren't powerful enough...
-仍无法模拟出这样的情况 -好,我有个问题 -...to simulate these conditions. -I have a question then.
你打算亲我吗? -Yeah? -Do you plan on kissing me ever?
这是个正当而合理的问题 答案是… That's definitely a valid question,and the answer...
是的.对,我曾想过 ...would be yes. Yes,I was.
但我要让这非凡的吻… But I wanted it to be this phenomenal kiss...
发生在非凡的时刻,因为是你 ...at a phenomenal moment because it's you.
当然 Sure.
但等得越久亲吻就越非凡 The longer I waited,the more phenomenal the kiss had to be.
而在此时此地,我想… Now,it's just gotta be one of those things where l...
…扫去桌上的一切,将你丢在上面 ...sweep everything off the table.
但我不是会扫去一切,那种猴急的男人 And I'm not really a sweeping sort of fella.
大卫,我想你是 David,I think you are a sweeping sort of fella.
你是被困在物理学家体内的猛男 I mean,you're a sweeper trapped inside a physicist's body.
-真的? -没错,我确定 -Really? -I'm sure.
你应该解放出来,把我丢上去吧 You should just do it. Just throw me.
-现在? -对,现在 -Now? -Yeah,right now. Just....
好.好.好 Okay. Okay. Okay.
这东西很贵的 You know what? This is really expensive.
这个是人家送的 And this was a gift.
-你在清理场地 -好吧,管他的 -Now you' re just tidying up. -Okay.
-你想让我丢上去还是自己跳上去? -我自己跳好了 -You want me to throw you? -I can hop.
告诉我,“没有约会的约定”对你们有何意义? T ell me something,what does " no-date pact" mean to you?
钱德有对象,菲比也有对象 It's just that Chandler and Phoebe have somebody.
所以我约了搞笑巴比 I thought I'd ask Fun Bobby.
-搞笑巴比?你的前任男友搞笑巴比? -对 -Your ex-boyfriend? -Yeah.
-你还认识其他的搞笑巴比? -我的确认识一个 -You know more than one Fun Bobby? -I happen to know a Fun Bob.
-来了 -太满了,我没法加牛奶了 -Okay. Here we go. -There's no room for milk.
好了,这下可以了 There. Now there is.
所以在这个没有约会的晚上,三人另有节目 So on our no-date evening,three of you now have dates.
-四人 -五人 -Four. -Five.
抱歉,保罗提早搭飞机回来 Sorry. Paolo's catching an earlier flight.
而我在商场遇上—个火辣辣的单亲妈妈 And I met this really hot single mom at the store.
我这个小精灵怎能抗拒? What's an elf to do?
这么说球落下那一刻 我是唯一一个孤零零的家伙? So I'll be the only one alone when the ball drops?
我们将举行盛大的派对 而且没人知道到底知道谁和谁 We'll have a big party,and no one will know who's with who.
我知道,而且这不是我现在需要知道的 I'll know. This is so not what I needed right now.
-你怎么了? -都是马修 -What's the matter? -Oh,it's Marcel.
他生我的气了 我不知道为什么 他一直不让我进门 He's angry with me. I have no idea why. He keeps shutting me out.
他拖着双手不断绕圈子 He's walking around all the time,dragging his hands.
真是诡异 我前几天晚上还跟他相处愉快 That's weird. I had a blast with him.
-真的? -我们一起玩,看电视 -Really? -We played,watched TV.
杂耍真是太精彩了 That juggling thing is amazing.
什么杂耍? What juggling thing?
拿袜子,我以为是你教他的 With the socks? I figured you taught him that.
我没有 No.
这也不算什么,只是拿袜子罢了 还有一颗香瓜 It wasn't that big a deal. Just socks. And a melon.
-菲比 -麦克斯,认识大家吗? -Phoebe! -Max. Do you know everybody?
不认识,你看见大卫吗? No. Have you seen David?
没有,他没在这儿 He hasn't been around.
看见他时告诉他快打包,我们要去明斯克 If you see him,tell him to pack. We are going to Minsk.
-明斯克? -在俄罗斯 -Minsk? -Minsk. It's in Russia.
我知道明斯克在哪儿 I know where Minsk is.
我们已申请到奖助金 全额赞助我们三年 We got the grant. Three years,all expenses paid.
如果你们去明斯克就是这样去的 And if you're gonna do Minsk,that's the way to go.
-你们何时去明斯克 -1月1日 -So when do you leave? -January 1 st.
-有人吗? -Hello? -What? Hey. Hi.
-你来这儿干什么? -麦克斯告诉我明斯克的事了 -What are you doing here? -Max told me about Minsk.
恭喜了,真叫人兴奋 Congratulations! This is so exciting!
能去的话会更叫人兴奋 It'd be even more exciting if we were going.
你不去了?为什么? Oh,you're not going? Oh,why?
告诉她,“我不打算去…” T ell her. " I don't wanna go...
…和李本斯、亚马古基与法朗克共事 ...to work with Lipson,Yamaguchi and Flank.
我要留下来和我的女友培养感情 I wanna stay and make out with my girlfriend! "
够了,麦克斯,谢谢 Okay,thank you,Max. Thank you.
你真的不去? So you're really not going?
我也不知道,我只是… I don't know what I'm gonna do. I just....
我怎么能离开你?我才刚刚遇到你 How can I leave you? I just found you.
大卫.你决定怎么办? Oh,David. But what are you gonna do?
我不知道.你决定 I don't know. You decide.
-别这样 -我是在求你 -Don't do that. -But l' m asking you.
-我不能那么做 -好吧,留下来 -I can't make a decision. Just -Okay. Stay.
-留下来 -留下来 -Stay. -Stay.
你进步神速啊! Getting so good at that!
这是麦克斯的东西 It was Max's stuff.
我喜欢菊芋 I love this artichoke thing.
别告诉我里面是什么 我明天才开始节食 Don't tell me what's in it. The diet starts tomorrow.
记得珍妮丝吗? You remember Janice.
历历在目 Vividly.
-感觉怎么样? -我现在感觉… -How are you? -I am fantastic.
…太奇妙了！ Now.
真的很奇妙.我们又一起回到了… It's amazing. We've been back together for what...
-…就像还有十分钟 -就这些? -...Iike 1 0 minutes,and -ls that all?
就好像我俩从来没有分开过一样 It's like we were never apart.
当然,我们会,原谅并且忘记 Of course,we were,but Forgive and forget.
好的,忘记 Well,forget.
我是珊蒂 -Hi. -Hi,l' m Sandy.
珊蒂,请进 Sandy,hi. Come on in.
-你把孩子都带来了 -对,可以吗? -You brought your kids. -Yeah. That's okay,right?
-我来了! -这东西不可以进来 -Party! -That thing is not coming in here!
东西?你都这样招呼客人吗? This is how you greet guests?
我问你,如果我带着新女友来 你也不欢迎她进来? If I showed up with my new girlfriend,she wouldn't be welcome?
你的新女友不会尿在我的咖啡桌上 Your new girlfriend wouldn't urinate on my coffee table.
他已经够难为情了,行吗? He was more embarrassed about that than anyone.
他已鼓足勇气回到这里 And for him to have the courage to walk back in here...
就当一切都没发生过一样 ...Iike nothing happened
好,叫他离我远点就是了 All right. All right. Just keep him away from me.
谢谢.来,马修 Thank you. Come on,Marcel.
咱们去交际一下吧 What do you say you and I mingle?
好吧,待会儿见 All right,I'll catch up with you later.
天啊,瑞秋,你没事吧? Oh,my gosh! Rachel,honey,are you okay?
-保罗在哪儿? -罗马.那混蛋没赶上飞机 -Where's Paolo? -Rome. Jerk missed his flight.
然后你的脸就爆炸了? And then your face exploded?
不是 No.
我在机场要进入计程车时 Okay. I was at the airport getting into a cab...
一个带着一本书的金发女人 ...when this woman,this blond planet with a pocketbook...
开始对我大叫,说是她先拦到的 ...starts yelling. Something about how it was her cab first.
然后她就开始扯我的头发 The next thing,she just starts pulling me out by my hair!
我拿出口哨猛吹 And I was blowing my attack whistle thingy...
结果又来了三辆计程车 ...and three more cabs show up.
我要进入车时,她又展开攻击 So as I'm going to get into a cab,she tackles me!
结果我撞上了路沿 嘴唇被口中的哨子弄伤 And I hit my head on the curb and cut my lip on my whistle.
大家玩得还愉快吧? Everybody having fun at the party?
-有人吃我的调味汁吗 -有的 -Are people eating my dip? -Yes.
那里 There.
-这看起来还行,对不? -你唇膏涂的有点厚了 -That looks okay,right? -You went a bit wide on the lipstick.
-是吗? -有点 -Oh,I did? -Yeah.
我很难看清楚,我眼睛肿起来了 It's hard for me to tell. My eye's closing up.
我来给你画吧 Let me get it for you.
-喔! -好了 -Ow! -Okay.
你们觉得怎么样?看起来不错 You know what? It looks fine.
好吧,我们出去吧 Okay,here we go.
去他的保罗,去他的心理变态计程车女人 Screw Paolo,screw the psycho cab lady.
这是新年前夜,我们过得开心点 It's New Year's Eve. Let's have a good time.
我们走吧 -Okay,here we go. -Okay.
好吧,来,门在这边 All right,there you go. This way.
这边走 Here you go.
我上周在商场看见你时 When I saw you at the store last week...
那或许是我第一次想像裸体的小精灵 ...it was the first time I ever mentally undressed an elf.
-真淫荡 -是的 -Wow,that's dirty. -Yeah.
孩子 Hey,kids.
他不必整晚和我待在一起 He doesn't have to spend the whole evening with me...
但至少也得来问候一声 ... but at least check in.
原来你在这儿 There you are!
你从我身边逃跑了 You got away from me.
-但又被你逮到了 -罗斯,帮我们照一张 -But you found me. -Here,Ross,take our picture.
笑一个,你在珍妮丝的相机中了 Smile. You' re on Janice Camera.
杀了我吧,现在就杀了我 Kill me. Kill me now.
嗨,我叫瑞秋 Hi,l' m Rachel.
你是谁的朋友啊? So whose friend are you?
看看我,洒的到处都是 Look at me,spilling everywhere.
各位,搞笑巴比来了 Everybody,it's Fun Bobby!
抱歉,我迟到了.我祖父他 Hey,sorry I'm late. But my grandfather...
他在两小时前过世了 ...died about two hours ago.
明天才有飞机,所以我来了 But I couldn't get a flight out till tomorrow,so here I am.
搞笑巴比,近来可好?谁死了? Hey,Fun Bobby! How's it going,man? Whoa! Who died?
他棺材将暂时不盖上 It's gonna be an open casket,you know?
所以我至少可以再见他最后一面 So at least I'll get to see him again.
巴比?搞笑巴比? Bobby? Fun Bobby?
我们简单聊聊 Let me talk to you for just a sec.
我外婆最近也刚刚去世了… I recently lost a grandparent myself...
所以我很能体会你现在的感受 ...so I really know exactly how you feel.
但是你确实把聚会的气氛弄得很糟 But you' re really bringing the party down.
-对不起 -好吧 -l' m sorry. -Yeah,yeah,okay.
这就行了.这就行了 There you go. There you go.
我要在上面哈口气,然后写上“破镜重圆” I' m gonna blow this one up and write " Reunited " in glitter.
珍妮丝,够了 All right,Janice,that's it!
珍妮丝…珍妮丝… Janice. Janice.
珍妮丝,我邀你来并不代表我们… Hey,Janice,when I invited you,I didn't think it meant
哦，不… Oh,no!
抱歉,让你误会了 I' m sorry you misunderstood.
你听我说…你听我说… You listen to me! You listen to me!
这可能是你我最后一次共处了 One of these times,it's just gonna be your last chance with me!
那东西可以给我吗? Will you give me the thing?
-麦克斯 -洋子(小野洋子造成披头士成员不合) -Hi,Max. -Yoko.
我决定自己去明斯克了 I've decided to go to Minsk without you.
-喔 -少了你将不太一样… -Wow. -lt won't be the same...
…但明斯克还是明斯克 新年快乐 ... but it will still be Minsk. Happy New Year.
-你还好吧? -没事,我没事,我没事 -Are you all right? -Yeah,l' m fine. I' m fine.
来 Come on.
-你去明克斯吧 -不,我不去了 -You' re going to Minsk. -No,l' m not going to Minsk.
你一定要去明斯克 You are so going to Minsk.
你属于明斯克 你不能因为我而留下来 You belong in Minsk. You can't stay here just for me.
如果我走,就代表我必须与你分手 If I go,I have to break up with you.
-但我不能和你分手. -是的,你可以的 -And I can't break up with you. -Yes,you can.
你可以说,“菲比,我爱你,但是工作是我的生命” Just say," Phoebe,I love you,but my work is my life.
“这是我必须做的.” That's what I have to do. "
然后我说,“你的工作?你竟说出这种话?” And I say,"Your work? How can you say that? "
接着你说,“我没有选择. 难道你不了解吗?” Then you say," I have no choice. Can't you understand that? "
我说,“不!不!我不了解!” And I say," No! No! I can't understand that! "
-疼 -对不起 -Ow. -Sorry.
然后你抱住我… And then you put your arms around me.
-然后你抱住我… -哦,对不起 -Then you put your arms around me. -Oh,sorry.
然后你对我说你爱我 你永远不会忘记我 And then you tell me you love me and you'll never forget me.
我永远不会忘记你 I'll never forget you.
你又说现在已接近午夜,你必须走了 Then you say that you have to go...
你不想与我共渡新年 因为你实在狠不下心离开 ... because you don't wanna start the year with me if you can't finish it.
我会想你的,科学家 I' m gonna miss you,you scientist guy.
我是迪克拉克 在时代广场 Hi,Dick Clark in Times Square.
时代广场这儿的五彩纸片纷纷落下 We're in a virtual snowstorm of confetti here in Times Square.
一年比一年进步 It gets better every....
好好睡吧，孩子 Here you go,kids.
然后孔雀就咬了我 And then the peacock bit me.
请在午夜吻我 Please kiss me at midnight!
-看见珊蒂没? -我不知该如何告诉你 -You seen Sandy? -I don't know how to tell you this...
她和麦克斯在莫妮卡的房里 ... but she's in the bedroom getting it on with Max.
哦,我都不知道怎么对你说 Oh,I did know how to tell you.
-各位,大球要掉了 -什么? -Hey,everybody,the ball is dropping. -What?
大球要掉了 The ball is dropping!
再过20秒钟就是午夜 In 20 seconds,it'll be midnight.
兴奋的时刻即将到来 And the moment of joy is upon us.
看起来没有约会的约定奏效了啊 Looks like that no-date pact worked out.
大家好像都很开心,我不喜欢 Everybody looks so happy. I hate that!
不是所有人都开心,嘿,巴比 Not everybody is happy. Hey,Bobby!
4…3…2… four,three,two...
…1!新年快乐 ...one! Happy New Year!
我这么说好了,我不是数学大师 I thought I'd throw this out. I' m no math whiz...
但我相信这儿有3对男女 ... but I do believe there are three girls and three guys right here.
今晚我不想亲任何人 I don't feel like kissing anyone tonight.
-我无法亲任何人 -我要亲大家吗? -I can't kiss anyone. -So,I'm kissing everyone?
不,你不能亲罗斯,他是你哥 No,you can't kiss Ross. That's your brother.
太好了,大家都亲,除我之外 So now everybody's getting kissed but me.
谁来亲我… Somebody kiss me.
谁来亲我…现在是午夜… 谁来亲我… Somebody kiss me! It's midnight! Somebody kiss me!
好吧,来吧 All right! All right!
这里! There!
我真的希望这样能够奏效 I wanted this to work so much.
我还在那里 I'm still in there.
替他换尿布,替他抓跳蚤 Changing his diapers. Picking his fleas.
但他却视为理所当然 But he's just phoning it in.
深爱某人却得不到回报 真是令人难过 It's hard that something you love so much doesn't love you back.
我想那个贱人打断了我的牙齿 I think that bitch cracked my tooth.