How about we skip appetizers?
With a cocktail buffet, we don't need appetizers too.
- Just an idea. - To bring costs down.
Only two courses. We're already top of the price range.
No! I wouldn't say you're top of the range.
As ranges go, you're...
standard.
If you want, let's reconsider appetizers.
Let's do something
lighter.
And cheaper.
Lighter.
For the photographer you suggested...
We thought, if we remove the white borders around the photos,
does that lower the price?
- Remove the borders? - Yes.
I'll find out.
I'm not convinced it will, but I'll ask.
Excuse me.
Yes, Adèle?
Quick, I'm with clients.
They're complicated.
You're unloading already?
The tableware's late?
Where's Nabil?
- Talk to him! - Sure.
I won't be long, Adèle. Ciao.
Sorry about that.
Next, the floral arrangements.
We thought, pricewise, maybe orchids are too much.
Look, we've reduced the budget several times.
I'm happy to review it, no problem.
That's the idea, to be honest.
I got that, to be honest.
As I tell all my clients, you have a magnificent venue.
Downtown Paris, luxury hotel.
200 guests.
It's a big deal. A wedding, not a block party.
It has to aim for a certain status.
Which comes with a price.
We can't lower it indefinitely.
Frankly,
we're not sure you want to find solutions.
Aren't you now?
I had a sense of being there, addressing your concerns.
Actually, we think
you're not very inventive.
Yes, that's right. Not very inventive.
Inventive?
I see.
Something springs to mind that's pretty inventive.
No appetizers, you're right.
- Great. - Absolutely. It's a good idea.
But we also skip the main course.
Now we get inventive.
You ask people to bring Tupperware boxes
with coleslaw, boiled eggs. Some bring a homemade salad.
Ask somebody to bring beer
and somebody else brings lemonade to make shandies.
Look...
Hold on, for the decoration,
I'm feeling inventive.
My little niece makes crepe streamers, orange and green.
Stuck to the tables or chairs with bits of tape, very pretty.
Don't take offense, we're only...
Sorry, I'm not done. For dessert...
Let's dispense with the mini-delights.
Forget them too, in favor of fruit purée!
High-end! Apple & pear, apple & strawberry.
Apple & banana!
Served in plastic cups with...
What are those little...
- Shortbread! - That's right.
Self-service purée!
Self-service! Inventive enough for you?
If you want, I'll come up with other ideas
to guarantee you're bottom of the range.
Subterranean.
Alright.
We'll think it over.
Sorry, I got a little carried away.
We'll be in touch.
I'll get back to you on the price.
Yes.
And the white borders.
- Thanks. - Goodbye.
There's no other solution.
I had to leave the truck on the shoulder
and wait for Seb.
I told Adèle all that.
Talk to each other, people.
Grégoire, I got your message about the buyout.
An offer from Valerie Laprade.
She can come by tonight, no problem.
Don't worry, my wife'll sign.
We're just taking a kind of break.
Yeah, Nicole, it's me.
Several things you should know.
I just spoke with Grégoire
and the buyout is firming up.
There's a woman who'll drop by the venue.
I'll be there later. Or sooner.
Nabil, the cop took my driver's license.
Seb's gonna get the truck.
I'll get my brother-in-law. See you there.
Go on, get past.
You call this a car?
I lost my license.
I was waiting there an hour.
You came in pajamas?
You're taking it up a level.
You don't even dress for work?
They're not pajamas, they're...
hybrid.
For around the house and...
They're totally pajamas!
Jesus!
Gimme a break.
You moron!
A wedding without music? Who's the moron?
- It's our turn! - Bullshit!
We gotta unload the champagne!
It's common sense!
You wouldn't know common sense if it hit you.
Just get outta my face!
- What's up? - One more word and I'll brain her.
I'd like to see you try!
Adèle!
"I'll brain her!"
She's lost it.
She gives me shit every time!
They're hogging the elevator. What about us?
Who says they have priority?
We break our backs lugging shit!
- This is your fault! - You're full of crap!
No, you're full of crap, craphead.
I'm a craphead?
Cut it out!
I am not a craphead!
Nobody is a craphead.
Get organized and get to work.
We all have work to do.
Sure, but how?
Frankie, grab the elevator.
- Grab it! - I'll elevate you!
Go crying to mommy!
Keep my mom out of this.
Screw you, asswipe!
I can't accept behavior like that from my team, Adèle.
It's not possible.
You know it. How many times have I told you?
You're no help, picking fights with everyone.
You can't talk to people like that. You know that too.
There's always a problem with the band.
It's like they're topping the bill at the Olympia.
They work weddings like us. We're not their slaves.
It sticks in my throat.
There's a real issue,
a problem with regard to respect, to honor.
Knock it off with respect and honor.
DJ Fab was lined up for the gig.
He's sick.
James is standing in for him.
We know he's temperamental.
So what do we do? We...
We adapt.
We keep calm and we adapt.
Think of the example you set to others.
You're supposed to represent me when I'm not around.
You wanted more autonomy.
You wanted to run the show on your own.
You think I'm gonna say yes, when I turn up
and I hear you talking crazy like that.
"Screw you, asswipe!"
That's how you represent me?
- Are you listening? - Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah!
To move up, it's important you change.
Yup, vulgarity doesn't suit you.
Blow me!
Much better.
An immediate improvement. You're on the right path.
Believe me, film is irreplaceable.
The texture, the grain, the depth of field.
Sure, digital is faster, but it has pros and cons.
It's you tonight?
No, I'm here with a view to buying the chateau.
That's funny.
Isn't that funny?
- We gotta run. - Wait! This is Bastien.
My 9th grade job shadow.
He's with me for a week to learn the trade.
They're waiters.
Maitre D, please.
Right.
- This is Seb and Henri. - Morning.
- Hi.
- I forgot, he's a pain. - I never forget long.
In our business, conviviality is key.
It's why people like me.
By the way,
when you say hello, throw in the person's name.
It puts a smile on faces.
- Four on the buffet. - Seb tending bar.
Mustache can't work today.
Really? So Henri and Nico inside.
Roshan and backup doing dishes.
And Patrice? I haven't seen him.
- Me neither. - Not sure he's here.
He always says stuff we know.
It's plate service, so we'll put Julien with Patrice.
What about Mirko?
I never know with him. Is Mirko here?
I saw him!
He came but he left. Adèle sent him home.
Nabil, find Adèle, will you?
So you thought, I'll holler in his ear?
Blasted my ear.
Everything okay?
Yes, fine.
Is he for real?
The dishwashers are great guys. I'll introduce you.
Here we have Roshan.
Morning, Roshan.
Sorry, I don't remember your name.
Kathirkamanathan Pillai.
In that case, hello will do.
Morning, Kathirkamanathan Pillai.
We've got to go set up.
Nice,
but I'm hearing "borning" not morning.
No, I said morning.
- Let's hear you say muffin. - Buffin.
The photographer is the boss's buddy. He's a bit odd.
And the other guy with the plumage? Who's he?
His son maybe.
Yes?
- You sent Mirko home? - Yeah.
You texted me, "Let go Mirko."
Not at all. I know exactly what I said.
I wrote, "Let's get Mirko."
I sent him home when I received "Let go Mirko."
- I know what... - Look if you want.
Why did it write that?
That's not what I meant. I don't get it.
It ended up as "Let go Mirko."
I got that.
This thing corrects words every time.
We all have problems with your texts.
Like, "Thanks Seb for your sweet massage."
See, it's the damn autocorrect.
And the punctuation always turns into
dumb gremlins sticking their tongues out...
- Wearing sunglasses. - Smileys!
That's right. That.
Mirko's a flake.
He never replies, he rocks up last-minute...
So now we're one waiter down.
That's what I thought.
It's like you said, about initiative.
Yes.
- Autonomy. - Right.
I called a replacement.
Excellent.
Let me see him when he arrives.
He wants paying on the books.
Just kidding.
The look on your face!
Yes, really funny.
Josiane, the look on his face!
She pulls that every...
Josiane.
What's going on?
We had a date last night.
I didn't feel like it.
- Not anymore. - You're joking?
I look like I'm joking?
What's up?
I've told you a hundred times.
I'm sick of it.
I think I need some space.
But you know my feelings for you. I'm doing my best.
You do nothing.
It's not about doing your best. Do it or don't.
I need to find the right time to talk to her.
Lucky you, one day with her, one day with me.
What about me?
If you find the right time, get back to me.
Text me maybe.
Sounds like you nail them.
So we prepare the hall. Tables, linen, buffet and everything.
The party starts, and what do we see?
- Blow. - I'm telling a story.
What do we see?
- Whose birthday is it? - I don't know.
This dog's.
- That should be 'a' dog's. - Yeah, this dog's.
No, you wish 'a' dog happy birthday.
Henri, "this dog" is incorrect.
- Understand? - So there we were...
No way. Costumes?
Wigs and everything. That sucks.
Screw Max, I'm not wearing a wig.
Calm down.
When he arrives, I'll tell him straight.
Yeah, talk to him because that's...
Henri, we're relying on you, okay?
- Tell him straight. - I will.
For my next trick, I'll make a monster appear.
It's not a farm animal but it stinks of bacon.
Ready? 3, 2, 1...
Copzilla!
Guys, where are we at?
- How come you're always late? - I just got off duty.
The drive here, striking farmers building barricades...
Bumper-to-bumper on the A15 near Franconville,
headed for the Montigny interchange.
So you thought you'd give us a traffic flash?
Max, Nico wanted a word.
Yes, Nico?
It was Henri.
Okay, Henri, make it quick.
- Hi, Max. - Hello.
- Go on. - It's just...
Well, we were thinking...
- Not planning. - Talking.
- And we all kind of agreed. - I see.
With regard to, y'know...
How we're going to be...
- Go on, Henri. - Hold on.
Just with regard to...
I mean, basically, you know,
everything's just fine.
- Sure. - But...
But?
But nothing.
- No, nothing. - Prepare sentences maybe.
I'd appreciate that.
We're late, nothing's ready.
Let's go!
If it comes back to you...
You told him straight!
He sure got the message.
Wrong time. I know Max. Wrong time.
We'll talk when the time's right. It was wrong.
- Careful, repetition. - Butt out, butthead!
Butt out, butthead! That's repetition!
Follow the wall. Can you see water?
There's nothing but water.
Here I am.
Seriously?
Shaved, I said.
No problem, you said. That's not shaved.
I had no razors, so I picked up my uncle's.
I've got everything. Even the suit.
Samy, you piss me off.
I lose a guy to get you the gig.
Make an effort. The bare minimum.
I'm here now.
Give me a heads-up.
What's the pay?
Tonight, you're special.
- Thanks a lot. - You dummy.
- "Special" means irregular staff. - Okay, I see.
- I thought you... - Shut up and listen.
If you nail it tonight,
there's a path from special to captain.
Captain?
I had another question. What's the pay?
First six months, you work free.
The look on your face!
€100 a night.
Cool!
Go shave someplace.
- Thanks, Adèle. - Move it!
Yeah, Nicole, me again.
Call me if you can. It's important.
[ Phone announces: ] Voicemail full.
- We have a major problem. - As in?
The layout. The table names are all wrong.
- That's a major problem? - You bet.
They're named for novels by Romain Gary or Emile Ajar except table 12...
- Future Times Three. - So what?
That's not by Romain Gary. It's by Barjavel.
Julien, who gives a shit? Gary, Ajar, Barjavel, 3 novelists!
That's not 3. Ajar was Gary's pseudonym.
I know, thank you. I'm not a complete idiot.
Okay, so it needs changing.
Let's see.
- The door's here. - It's the kids table!
It's a detail. Nobody gives a damn.
I give a damn, sorry.
It's not very coherent.
Go and cohere it if it bothers you so much.
- And move on. - Okay.
That's my suggestion.
- Okay by you? - Okay.
Looks like we solved a major problem.
I think so.
Awesome.
It's just that Ajar and...
That's why I...
Never ceases to amaze me.
Of course, every wedding is different.
So every venue is different.
The important thing is finding the right position.
That doesn't happen by magic, of course.
It requires experience.
A nose for things.
Is that you stinking the place out?
- It stinks of caramel. - It's candy apple flavor.
Say hello to Max.
Morning, Max.
See what you see there. And come back.
Okay.
- My 9th grade job shadow. - Good of you.
He's funny.
Say, Max, we need to talk.
Things are tight these days.
- These days? - Yes.
If you can swing me some work...
What am I doing tonight?
I know, thanks. Only you still hire me.
- I won't always be here. - How come?
- No reason. - Not no reason.
How's your mother?
In a bad way. She lives with me now.
I'd no idea.
Lost the use of her legs.
Shoot.
Know what she said the other day?
Who's Max?
- The memory's going. - That too?
How old is she now?
96.
A life well lived.
What makes you say that? You think she should die?
Not at all.
Guy, I don't have all day.
Worse than a freaking train station! Take the stairs!
Don't care, not my problem.
Bernard, what's with the strawberry cake?
- It's not on the menu. - A strawberry cake?
No, I have to stop you right away.
Birthdays, blowing out candles. It's not for me.
Sweet of you but I'd rather not.
No, that's my apprentice practicing.
Sure.
I'd no idea it's your birthday.
Happy birthday.
No kisses!
Why give me a kiss? People'll wonder what the kiss is about.
Sorry, if I'd known, I wouldn't...
- Happy birthday anyway. - Stop saying that word, dammit.
What the hell!
It's my waiter look.
Come on, follow me. Move it!
I copied it from the steakhouse.
- The crumpled shirt's a no-no. - Quit stressing me out!
So what's he going to ask?
Nothing much, just a few questions.
Keep cool. I told him you had experience.
If you don't know, act like you do. Wing it.
- Quiet, that's him. - Didn't say a word.
I can't hire more staff.
Get yourself an intern.
Let me introduce Samy.
Replacing Mirko.
Mr. Angeli, aka Max.
Adèle tells me you have experience.
Yes, briefly.
Meaning?
- It was fast. - Fast food experience?
Yes, exactly.
Any particular outfit?
Restaurant uniform, mostly.
Uniform?
You know how to cut a sole or a perch?
A perch?
Bass?
I played a bit, the basics...
Anyway, it's meat tonight.
That's lucky. Tell Patrice to look after him.
- Lose the whiskers. - Really?
- And don't sleep in your shirt. - I told him.
Told you.
Josiane says the client will be here in 5.
So soon?
Roshan, come with me.
Don't you know anything? Bass is a fish.
Alright! I wondered how that was relevant.
Like a sole and perch, it's a fish!
A perch is a fish?
I'm going to meet the client. Come get me in five minutes.
- Okay? - What do I say?
Whatever. Make something up, find a pretext.
As a general rule, whenever you see me...
When you see me with him, interrupt. Or else I'm stuck.
- He's kind of... - Alright.
- Five minutes. - Got it.
Afternoon, Pierre. Congratulations!
Today of all days, they kick up shit!
Kick up shit?
What time is it?
5 pm, but it's all under control.
Can you be quiet? I'm on the phone.
Keep me posted, we'll talk later.
Is there a problem?
My in-laws are in a tailback because of the farmers.
Yes, bumper-to-bumper on the A15,
near the Herblay exit but it's fluid by the interchange.
Thanks, I don't need a traffic flash.
These are the floral decorations?
That's right.
It's not what I expected.
- Really? - It's not how I imagined them.
I followed the instructions in your letter.
I wrote you a letter?
When you insisted on the importance of the timing.
Not a letter, an email.
No, I mean, sure...
- Electronic mail. - Not a letter.
Moving on, I think we can expect
my speech to overrun, so adjust the schedule.
That's your speech?
Sure it's not your memoirs?
- We need to adjust the schedule. - Yes, we'll...
We'll fit it in. I'll let the band know
and we'll try to slot it in.
Even if the timing
is tricky, as you stipulated in your
letter
or electronic mail.
Email!
So you're not listening? Great.
I'm so glad you're working tonight. It's cool.
You're a cutie.
What's that?
- Is that Fab? - Yes.
No, not exactly.
There was a minor change of plan.
In fact, it's James...
Fab had a hitch, so James is the entertainment.
James?
Is this a joke? You recommended Fab.
I called him and chose the option Fab Live Band DJ+4.
It's exactly the same.
They offer the same deal, they work together.
He's the James Five Star Band 4.
I can't hear me.
I can't fucking hear me!
He's scary.
I told you, sober, chic and elegant.
Absolutely.
Sober is James's middle name.
You know how long I've planned this wedding?
Let's be clear, I don't want The Gipsy Kings.
No garter, no chicken dance.
- No twirling napkins. - Twirling napkins?
That's not at all, at all...
This is very annoying.
Why wasn't I informed?
Mr. Max?
- Can't you see I'm busy? - I can't find pretext.
You can't?
Excuse me.
You kept me waiting an hour!
I said 5 minutes. What were you doing?
- I looked all over, no pretext. - I noticed.
Calm down. Quit bawling!
Not bawling, warming up.
Your voice is so warm, you'll fry it.
For your information, tonight's sober, chic and...
agreeable.
- Agreeable? - Right!
[ Table name card: ] Future Times Three
Excuse me...
Incredible.
It's been so long.
I don't know. Two years.
In March.
March 17th, it'll be two years.
You're surely...
You're not related to Pierre?
Sure I am. Kind of.
Crazy.
You vanished without trace.
One fine day, no news of you.
It was just after our school trip to...
- Edinburgh. - Edinburgh, that's right.
I remember trying to contact you and...
- You tried to contact me? - Yes.
Then there were all those rumors.
You remember Blasco, the math teacher?
She claimed to have run into you
in a shopping mall
in pajamas.
Me, in pajamas? No way!
Some people!
No, that wasn't me.
I changed school, different district.
So it wasn't me.
Julien?
- Julien. - Yes, alright.
Can you help with the letter?
Wait for me over there, by the door.
The guy's from Pakistan...
You're not changed yet? The photos are soon.
Julien, related to Pierre.
What the hell is this?
- Hurry up now, darling. - Yes.
Julien?
- She tried to contact me. - Really?
Two minutes, please.
We need a quick chat.
You're kidding me!
Honestly, nothing leaps out at you?
It's easy, dead easy.
There's one missing?
Isn't regular spacing prettier? Harmonious?
Sure.
There you go. Regular spacing, nothing complicated.
Told you so.
Keep it zipped.
It's a trick question, nothing leaping out at you?
It's a trick.
Okay, tip top. Perfect balance.
Sorry, warming up my voice. Takes time.
Hello there.
Yes, hello. Was that Italian?
- Yeah. - Really? Sure?
Nonsense. I speak fluent Italian.
It's a kind of blend of dialects.
Some southern Abruzzo...
- The mountains. - It wasn't Italian.
No.
I'm very upset about this change of plan.
And I don't see the big screen.
- Where is it? - Good point. The screen...
Hold on, the big screen...
No, it's not here.
That's normal. It's not in the option.
Odd. I opted for Fab Live Band DJ+4.
Screen included.
It's on option. We have it as well, James Live Band DJ+4.
The deal you want in fact is...
So it's my fault?
I didn't say that.
Brief parenthesis...
Tonight will be sober, chic and elegant.
And agreeable. I got the message.
Parenthesis over?
I don't know. I do music, not parentheses.
I emphasize, tonight is my wedding.
So no idiotic games.
No musical chairs.
Above all, no twirling napkins.
- Not our style. We don't do that. - Perfect.
By the way, I found these on the tables.
- You like my flyers? - Yuck.
If you could remove the rest...
It's a bit...
Kind of me, me, me. It's inappropriate.
- Follow me? - Sure.
- Is that clear? - Crystal.
Great. You'll rig up the screen?
- You're the boss. - And no junk!
- It's not junk. - It is.
Thanks a lot.
- What's up, Patrice? - I'm checking the torches.
He's checking the torches.
- We're good to go. - Okay, Bernard.
Roll out the steamers.
Chilled, Nabil?
The steamers, let's roll!
Roshan, the action's back there.
Move it, the steamers are rolling!
What kind of lamebrain are you?
Not here! You're in the way.
You never learn!
Calm down. I'm here till I find the right spot.
Can't you see you're in the way?
Move your fat ass!
I mean, really.
Seeing is not believing.
That's the effect I have on her.
I don't believe in believing.
It's not my philosophy.
What did you hear, for example?
Can't you see you're in the way?
Move your fat ass!
Sucking on your scummy vaporizer!
Dumbass photographer,
use that birdbrain of yours!
She didn't say all that.
Sure, maybe I was a little approximative.
It was instinct talking, whatever came into my head.
But it's the basic idea.
Basically, yes. Anyway...
I'll take this.
You take all the rest.
Bernard, racks in the cold store.
What the hell's going on? Frankie!
What's that now?
Circuit overload. The band are to blame.
Band is singular.
Patrice, let's go check the meter.
No, Patrice, stay here.
We need somebody to...
To look after...
Josiane, I'll go with you.
The fuses have blown.
Thanks, Nabil.
To avoid tripping the electricity, we need a system.
When we turn on the steamers,
I signal you to send the dancers to their tables.
Super. I like your thinking.
Excellent. We coordinate.
That's the idea.
But I prefer the other way around.
I signal you and send people to their tables.
I respect an arc in my sequences. Nothing happens at random.
Get it into your head, the kitchen follows a protocol.
We don't spin records. When it's ready, it goes out.
Get it into your head, with your limited resources,
that entertainment is hard science, see?
Entertainment is hard science?
Entertainment's a science now?
It's hot air!
You make it sound like astrophysics.
Making people dance doesn't save lives, right?
I cannot interrupt a cycle at random.
Screw your stupid cycles!
If the steamers are on, cue up a slow number
send folks to their tables, and cut the crap!
I cannot!
What's gotten into everybody?
Etienne!
- What? - A lady to see you.
Never rains but it pours.
Say, don't call me Etienne in public. It's James.
I prefer James.
- Good afternoon! - Afternoon.
- Are you DJ Fab? - As good as.
The groom's mother.
Super! What can I do for you?
Did my son give you my list of songs?
Not so far, but rest assured, we have it covered.
I forgot to include Maurice Chevalier.
- Maurice Chevalier? - Yes.
Let me see that list.
Leonard Cohen rings a bell.
For later, when the party's swinging.
First, Don Sablon and Félix Mayol, you know?
- Félix Mayol, you have? - Maybe not him specifically.
- We have a pre-war crooner file. - So that's a no?
No. We'll dig them up, roll them out.
Just in case, I brought a recording.
You have auto-reverse?
Did we bring the auto-reverse?
- We did. - I'll leave it with you.
Thank you so much, DJ Fab.
James, but that's okay.
Punk is not dead!
For the cocktails. Upstairs.
Let me see.
Not bad.
Samy, is it?
Samy?
Yes?
Grab some flutes.
Flutes?
What the heck!
The guy's a total wacko.
What's he doing?
Playing a bird?
- What are you doing? - Grabbing some flutes.
This way.
What's going on with Patrice? What's your game?
That's what you call, needing space?
- Are you enjoying this? - I am, thanks.
Are you doing this to punish me?
That's just great.
No!
Nobody in the shot! There's an old biddy!
That's my mother.
- Mommy, move, will you? - Yes, mommy, move.
Let's go.
Yes, bravo, that's nice.
Great! That's...
No, we're not going to get along.
- I'm the groom's mother. - Lucky you.
You stick to being mother, I take the photos.
You get them all later in various formats.
Fridge magnets, even.
Ma'am, I asked nicely. Back up now!
C'mon, I'm confiscating it!
Bad Josiane! Nasty girl!
- It stinks of cotton candy! - Hands off!
Before servers ate what the guests ate.
The good old days.
When I'm working, I hate people and their damn phones.
Do I give them shit when they're working?
What did you do before coming to France? That's the issue.
- You had a job? - Yes.
Musician, in a band in Sri Lanka.
All the dishwashers. We had our own band.
Say, what's all this?
- Your meals. - So I see.
- Where's Adèle? - I don't know.
Don't touch that. Don't eat it.
She's getting on my nerves.
Screw people who take photos on smartphones!
Got it, Bastien?
That's quite a lot of people.
I don't care.
Don't give a damn.
You've heard of the French spelling reforms?
Killing off an accent, the little hat.
Tragedy for Jerômes everywhere!
Whatever you say.
He's got a screw loose.
- You've eaten? - Yes.
[ Answering machine: ] You have reached the voice-mail of
[ Answering machine: ] Nicole.
Yes, Nicole...
I assume you didn't get my message.
There was a...
A problem.
Where was I? Why don't you answer?
I'll think you see my number and don't pick up.
I'd consider hiding my number but I don't know how.
We need to talk.
Yes, Roshan?
I just wanted to say I know your...
Spit it out, I'm...
Happy birthday.
No, it's tomorrow.
- What's up? - I'm moving Tuesday.
Can I use the truck for furniture?
The truck, sure, no problem.
[ Phone announces: ] Your message could not be recorded.
[ Phone announces: ] Message deleted.
There's something else.
You're still young.
How old tomorrow? 40-45?
Of course. Just tell me what you want.
Can I take Tuesday off for my move?
Take Tuesday off? Yes, logical.
I'm moving...
I got that.
Cut that out.
Alright.
It's not how it works. It's written in black and white.
We eat same as the guests.
If you hadn't flunked 3rd grade, you'd be able to read.
Cool it. Adèle, come with me.
They eat same as the guests.
It's in the contract. He's right.
It's a gray area so l...
Get off his back.
That's enough.
There you go.
Don't forget the drinks.
Remember, once and for all,
the chateau is 17th century.
So we're limited in terms of electricity.
The builders didn't plan for spotlights and sound systems.
So we don't all crank it up at once.
We alternate,
we coordinate, we talk,
we share, so it doesn't blow again.
And finally, I'd like us
to avoid tensions.
To keep calm.
And as I tell you every time,
your conduct and manners are our shop window.
We have 200 guests tonight, 200 judges.
And an important client,
who has entrusted to us his whole wedding planning.
Let's show him he chose right.
I'm relying on you to make sure tonight
is a beautiful event.
Questions?
Go on, Henri.
No, it's not...
The time is right.
Henri, go ahead.
Speak up.
Great question. Another?
Max, we have to wear these costumes?
We're all wondering.
The problem's the wigs. They're weird.
They're unhygienic, not up to code.
And really itchy.
We can't spend all night with those on our heads.
Hold on, I said all along,
the valet's costume includes the wig, at least until dessert.
It comes with a bonus of €47.
It's not about a bonus, they just stink.
It's not easy, serving in these ridiculous costumes.
They're boiling hot, we sweat like pigs.
My point exactly.
- He's right. - Last time was bad enough.
For €47, I'll wear a wig.
I'm not sure how to phrase this
so it's clear, concise and precise.
If anybody doesn't want to wear the costume, no problem.
None.
Go to the lockers, grab your belongings and take a hike.
Everybody else, ready to welcome clients in 5 minutes.
Wigs on heads.
Let's go!
Henri, how about that!
The wig looks great.
- It was a good idea, in fact. - You see?
Sing it with me.
Topping up.
Naturally, what else?
I shuffle the deck, fan out the cards and...
Your name, sir?
- Benjamin. - What a memory!
Pick a card, any card.
No, Benjamin...
- Will he leave any for my guests? - Pardon me?
The best!
I hope you laid in supplies.
- You need to come about something. - Of course.
- Excuse me. I'm on it. - I'd appreciate it.
Was that good?
- Perfect. - But still no pretext.
You'll find one eventually.
Go ask about the foie gras.
Guy, you've got nothing better to do than nix the buffet?
Stuffing your face!
I hardly touched it.
Do me a favor, get back on your stand.
There's nowhere for the photocall.
So you scarf the petits fours? Logical.
I took one.
Activate your boosters and get to work.
And put a jacket on, make yourself presentable.
It turns out the foie gras isn't sauteed...
I didn't ask you to ask.
- It's mi-cuit. - I didn't ask him to ask.
Amazing! He's going too far now.
- You asked me to ask. - Of course, I did.
So, about the foie gras?
- It's mi-cuit. - Gorgeous!
Let's go.
Take my tray while I run to the kitchen.
Sorry?
Pardon me!
Petit four?
With pleasure.
- Spoilt for choice. - Absolutely.
What's the red one?
Take your time, I'll be right back.
Pierre!
Helena!
- You can explain, I suppose? - Yes, it's...
An everyday accident.
I bump into man. Man drops phone.
Ask the kid.
Go on, tell him.
I'll go see what I see. And come back.
What do I tell the client? You thought of that?
Ask about the magnets.
If we don't order before 10 tonight, they won't ship.
Guy, we...
We go way back.
Yeah.
- We're friends. - Sure, we are.
You remember what you told me?
"Only you still hire me."
- Remember? - It's true.
You get the concept?
"Only you."
- I get the concept. - Good. Now get a grip.
Talk to people politely, explain.
And take photos, that's your job.
And no more about you tonight.
I beg you.
Be so kind.
And change the jacket. It's a terrible idea.
- It was your idea. - I was wrong.
All wrong. I had something else in mind.
That's lucky, it's...
So I see. It's your shadow's?
Give it back.
♪ From her bro Toto I bought an auto
♪ I paid a sum considerable To Mr. Hannibal
♪ Who sells second-hand... ♪
I don't know it.
Yes, rings a bell! I have the single, I'll play it.
Excuse me, do you have any Gaston Ouvrard?
Yes, fantastic. Just after Maurice Chevalier, marvelous!
- Come here. - Right away.
Excuse me.
I forgot an important issue. The thank-yous.
- I'm all ears. - Great.
Before the main course, on my signal, you announce,
"I'd like to thank someone whose contribution was crucial tonight,
"without whom nothing would have been possible."
- Get the picture? - Absolutely.
Improvise, but not too much.
House lights down, upbeat music, guests on their feet...
Napkins twirling!
Just kidding.
Let's recap.
You're with me? You say, "It's all thanks to Pierre."
Thanks to Pierre. Fine.
Who's Pierre?
I am.
He made it!
Do you have "Zozo's Sombrero"?
No "Zozo". I'll be right back.
Hello, I'm related to Pierre.
You've said hello?
On a count of three.
One, two...
Three. Awesome!
I know what you're going to say.
You don't have a clue!
Just let me explain.
She's an ex-coworker, a history teacher.
What's your definition of work?
I bumped into her again today,
when I was setting tables.
I got a huge shock, palpitations even.
Quick question. Did you notice her white dress?
Yes.
Julien, hearing you talk like that,
despite my affection for you,
I wonder why I'm the dumb fool reaching out to you.
- You can't say that. - Pardon me?
It's redundant.
"Dumb fool" is redundant. It's a pleonasm.
It's like saying, "starting from now on."
Really? Let's see...
"Starting from now on," here's the deal,
you have two options.
Either you jump into your valet costume,
complete with wig, and get back to work.
Or you put your saggy pajamas back on
and watch cable news in your tiny, little flat.
Another pleonasm! Tiny little!
- Yes, pleonasm. - Tiny little flat.
Two options. Shoot.
Can you repeat the choices?
There you are!
- What's up? - We have trouble.
- What kind? - The now kind!
Max, after weighing the pros and cons, I take option two. Leaving.
Excellent! That way.
You're gonna be able to play?
No?
Max, it's a nightmare. I'm at my wits' end.
Look at poor Titi.
I've never seen him like this.
Titi, tell me how you feel exactly.
Like I have a steel rod in my gut.
You think you can get a sound out?
Musically, I mean.
Lying down, I'm fine. Standing up, the rod's there.
- Lying down's fine. - He can't play lying down.
The balloon guys, fireworks guys and magician,
anyone who ate lamb is kaputt.
Staff meals were fine.
It's beyond doubt.
It's a disaster. I have a singer who eats organic and my veggie bassist.
I can't go all night with a bass.
Play records and tell the guys to mime.
We adapt!
On-site investigations reveal
the refrigerated trailer was unplugged.
For sure, the meat's gone off.
Holy shit!
We're in it deep.
At the scene,
the unplugging appeared premeditated.
I found an electric shaver.
Without jumping to conclusions,
it looks like sabotage.
The lamb laid them low.
I checked the meat. It's past its best.
We must remain vigilant.
Speaking hypothetically, it looks like food poisoning.
Max, what do we serve them now?
There you are!
Everything okay?
Impeccable.
- So we can seat the guests? - Super!
Perfect. Let's go!
Puff pastries!
Puff pastries?
Bring out the big guns.
Pastries buy us time to find a solution.
We adapt.
C'mon, let's go. Pastries!
Pastries! Trash the rest!
Thanks, Antoine, but I'll get by.
Exactly.
See you, Antoine.
We're good. Hubert at Parc Royal can bail us out.
Amazing. I'll dash there and back.
Adèle, I need a word.
Roshan, come on.
20 years in the job, first time for pastries.
I've heard about it, never saw it happen.
I don't get it. What are we doing?
Anchovy pastries, it's an age-old tactic.
If the kitchen has a disaster, pastries really line the stomach.
And super salty anchovies make you thirsty,
so you guzzle fizzy water and swell like popcorn.
What's the point?
They kill people's appetites and buy you time.
Keep going, I'll explain tomorrow.
Put salt on them.
Alright, let's roll!
Good service, apply yourselves.
Don't forget, one pastry,
one glass of fizzy water!
More of the same!
Quality presentation!
James, nobody should notice a thing.
Line up the groom's speech.
In 30-45 minutes I'll be back.
Copy that.
Adèle, you're in charge. Keep the pastries coming, play for time.
Keep it moving till I get back.
Got it.
We synchronize watches?
What a dork!
- What now? - Synchronize watches!
- What's your problem? - My problem is you talking shit!
- It's a good idea! - Stop!
I'm calling a timeout!
I've had it.
You're gonna shake hands.
That's right, you're gonna shake hands now.
I'm waiting.
- I don't have all night! - No.
Shake hands, dammit.
Go ahead.
Come on.
I'm not buying it.
- Come off it. - We shook, that's good enough.
- Come back here. - No!
Dammit!
Instead of making a scene,
come back here.
Give each other a...
What's it called? A hug!
You bet! We're a team, James!
C'mon, Adèle!
- That's good but could be better. - Happy now?
Almost a team.
I'm kind of buying it.
I'm buying it now.
That's what I call a team.
Much better, I'm really feeling the respect.
Yes, I'm liking the respect.
That's fine.
Guys, ready when you are.
Enough.
Nobody?
Pastries, that's a state of emergency.
Forget our divergences. I messed up,
but if you need me, well...
I can drive for you.
I appreciate it, but you're ready for bed.
As usual, I'll take care of it.
Has something upset him?
Roshan!
- Can you drive? - No license.
You two made up?
We made up, thanks.
Don't be like this...
I'm not ready for bed. They're hybrid.
What's gotten into you?
No, nothing.
You okay?
- You know Roshan? - Sure.
- Julien, my brother-in-law. - Evening!
Hubert, you're a lifesaver.
We gotta stick together. You'd do the same.
I prepped all I have left over
and defrosted some pastries, just in case.
Pastries, we've got covered.
No worries, it's all in the cold store.
Siva, get the stuff we put to one side.
This way.
Tonight's a shitstorm.
He's freaking me out with his pretext thing.
That old trick? I never find one either.
Very musical, your language.
Ladies and gentlemen, your attention for a second, please.
I'd like to call on someone, not just anyone.
Someone quite exceptional, quite unique...
Someone who is quite generous and very agreeable.
Someone without whom we wouldn't be here tonight,
who prepared every moment of this wonderful evening.
He personifies kindness and humility.
On your feet, everybody!
Give it up, a big round of applause, for Pierre!
No, I can't possibly, not me.
Come on, Pierrot!
Stop!
On stage, we're waiting! Let's hear it!
Should I, shouldn't I?
Don't try to get out of it. We want you!
What an asshole!
Pastry?
No way, not now.
C'mon, or napkins will twirl.
Let's go, Pierre!
We have a lot to get through.
Here he comes! Big up for the man...
Pierrot!
Come up on stage, come on.
Let's hear it!
Pierrot! Give it up for him!
Stop that now. Don't call me Pierrot.
Okay, that's great.
Thanks a lot.
Thank you so much!
This is the last thing I expected. Please, sit.
I should point out,
I'm no great orator,
but I'll try to say a few words.
Pierre has always loved speeches.
- Since he was a boy. - Really?
Helena and I decided that I would speak,
all alone, but on behalf of both of us.
- Isn't that so, my love? - Yes.
Love you.
Yes, it is my duty...
I don't remember who said you were hanging up your boots.
It's bullshit, right?
- I'm considering it. - For real?
I couldn't do it.
Retirement. The word depresses me.
- Wouldn't you miss it all? - I don't think so.
If you can recommend any of your guys...
Yes, maybe I can.
Tonight, though, they drove me crazy.
A revolution 'cause they're above wearing costumes.
Gave me a load of crap about the wigs.
Sure, the client wanted all the servers dressed as valets.
I see their point.
- All the servers? - Yes.
Come with me.
Help yourself.
Here, it's all the servers...
And all the guests!
Mazel tov!
All around Kevin
for his Bar Mitzvah!
Quite a sight, right?
The Apache rabbi is perfect!
Siva, I'll look over your letter and return it via Roshan.
Okay, thanks.
He's good, a former teacher.
He can help out with letters.
He had a nervous breakdown.
Are you saying bad things about me or...
No, I said you're a great teacher.
That's kind of you.
- Is that why he's in pajamas? - He claims they're hybrid.
That was about me. I have no Tamil, but "hybrid" and "pajamas"!
Naturally, if by any chance I forget anyone,
don't go thinking there's a hierarchy,
a competition.
Tonight, if I am overcome by emotion,
and those who know me well...
I see you smiling. They know it's hard for me to control.
I feel compelled to tell you,
why not,
I love you!
Sorry.
Getting a grip on ourselves,
I like you all equally.
What a night, my friends!
Have you heard from your sister?
She hasn't...
You haven't talked?
About what?
I leave messages, she doesn't reply. It's not like her.
Make the most of this break to...
To refresh...
To look around and meet new people.
Why do you say that?
I don't know why.
Honestly, I don't know why you two are still together.
I don't know what you're clinging to.
Clinging to?
We're together, we're a couple. That's what I cling to.
Right.
A couple, are you?
Powerful.
The force of your arguments has overwhelmed me.
- Let me tell you something. - Please don't.
It's your marriage that's gone off.
You guys stink of boredom.
I don't know, your relationship's...
To my mind, it's pathetic. I'm groping for the word.
I get your drift, Julien.
You know me.
Malignant, that's the word I was...
Eyes on the road.
Groping for. Your relationship is malignant.
That's really uplifting. I feel so much better for talking to you.
You're welcome.
I feel better too.
Wonderful.
- You feel better too? - Yes.
- The hat suits you. - Cowboy hat.
I'd like to thank all those who traveled from far and wide...
From Compiègne, from Marton...
From Fontainebleau,
from Porchefontaine, from Boislieu,
from Goualières, my cousin from Buc...
They're wolfing them down. Next batch coming up!
You're all alone? I was looking for you.
I'm getting some air. Damn groom and his speech.
He's been going years, right?
Some folks were kids when they arrived.
He's painful.
- I got a text to say they're coming. - Me too.
Say, here's what I suggest.
I'll get them dancing.
Give me the signal, and I'll send them to sit down.
Ladies and gents, dinner is served. My signature style.
- We'll fit in with you, no sweat. - It's no sweat.
If we take too long and you're mid-cycle,
do your thing.
We adapt, we go with the flow.
You tell me when.
You have priority.
I know how the kitchen works. A pretty signal from you...
- And I jump. - There's no rush.
It's an elegant gesture. I appreciate it.
That's just it, let me be elegant.
- No, you guys first. - You guys first.
You guys first...
No, you guys first...
I said I don't give a fuck!
If I may quote Racine...
"Burrus does not believe a word he speaks.
"Shrewd virtue... takes his credit to new peaks."
There's always a tipping point when I get bored shitless.
Tonight, it's right now.
At times like this, I have a foolproof trick.
You're not asking what?
No.
Ask what my trick is.
What's your trick?
Curious, aren't you?
I look at a woman and ask myself questions about her.
Is she...
Is she married?
Is she happy?
Does she want me to make a move?
Questions without answers.
There's a way to find out.
Find out what?
If any women here are signed up and geolocated.
Who's married, who's single, who's available?
How the heck would you know?
An app collates online dating sites with a geolocation function.
- You know what geolocation is? - Yes.
Remind me.
And what's an app?
An application.
Alright.
By a satellite positioning system, you know in real time
if a woman interested in your profile is close by.
Here, for example.
How do you know if she's here?
That's geolocation.
- That's a thing? - Sure.
The app gives your distance from the girl.
If you like her profile, you send a heart.
If she likes you, she sends one back. Then you have a chance to chat,
do stuff, take it up a level.
Do stuff? I wanna do stuff.
I want to, you hear? I want to.
Why don't I have the application?
Let me see your phone.
Careful, it's the latest iPhone.
Not quite the latest.
Go on, send hearts.
- Create a profile first. - I know.
Send hearts. We'll do the profile later.
- I'll go change then. - You do that.
- Well? - All under control. We're good.
Good news, bad news?
Good news. The pastries worked a treat.
Great.
The groom's speech has KO'd them.
Max, it's gonna be a squeak.
Serve half portions.
Even so.
Serve thirds, sauce, vegetables. What's the choice?
Precisely. We adapt.
- Bad news? - An old guy choked on a pastry.
Shit!
He croaked, he's in the cold store.
The look on your face.
Knock it off!
It's no time for jokes!
Josiane and Patrice are looking after him.
There's the look, but it wasn't a joke.
There was no look!
I'll have a word with the groom.
I'd like to conclude this speech
with the words of Pierre Augustin Caron de Beaumarchais,
who in 1775 or thereabouts,
wrote this line in The Barber of Sevilles,
"I am quick to laugh at everything,
"for fear of it making me cry."
With that, my friends, let's go on with the party!
Thank you, everybody.
That was magnificent.
- Sure? - Yes!
- Thanks, but stop the pastries. - They're a surprise, on the house.
Why don't you serve the main course?
In a few minutes.
We didn't want to interrupt the speech. It was so powerful.
It was.
- Not too long? - No. For me, it flew by.
And your favorite bit?
It's hard to pick one but...
- The end... - Beaumarchais?
That packs a punch.
"I quickly cry so I have time to..."
Corinne, I missed you!
I'll hit him.
I forgot to mention, a tiny concern.
That guy, he's been here half an hour.
Watching, prowling, snapping photos, asking to see you.
It won't work every time, the look on your face!
I'm serious, it's no joke.
Him, over there!
Who the hell is that?
I don't know, but he's weird.
Why the attaché case?
- Shit! - What?
You've got a match.
She just replied.
30 meters away.
What's she like? There's a photo?
The profile's hidden.
Send hearts.
With a hidden profile, it's not advisable, not a good sign.
Send hearts anyway.
Henri, tell Max what you told me earlier.
It's not exactly...
Go on, tell him.
Come on, speak up!
Sabbatini, the Italian caterer. A friend works for him.
He got inspected like that, at a function, by Social Security.
He had to pay a fine,
around €40,000, something like that.
He paid folks off the books.
There are rumors that inspectors are cracking down.
Surprise audits.
He looks the part.
- Water! - Give him air!
Lay him in the recovery position.
- Give him sugar! - Air!
- Great time to speak up. - What did I say?
Okay?
Feel better?
Stop the whatever...
Working a reception on an empty stomach...
With the stress and tension, something had to give.
Especially at your age.
You just felt a bit woozy. Don't beat yourself up.
- Another? - It's so salty! I'd forgotten.
Why's everybody stressed out? Maybe he's a guest who arrived late.
A guest? At a wedding with an attaché case?
Yes, the attaché case could be considered evidence of...
Yeah, precisely.
Josiane?
Tonight, who's off the books?
Us, I guess. An affair off the books.
Come on, stop it.
Three or four, tops.
Guys, who's working off the books?
Not so high, just like this.
No more than that.
If you're off the books, pull on a jacket,
mingle with the guests,
and be discreet. Discreetly.
Move it, let's go!
I'll go change again.
Looks to me like you fainted.
Can't rule it out.
- Good evening, children! - Hello!
- A pastry? - No, I'm fine.
They're too salty.
I know.
I've been looking for you.
We should take a photo at each table with me.
Yeah. I mean, of course.
Later, sure.
If you don't mind, I'd prefer now.
Actually, I do mind a little.
But let's do it.
- Thank you. - After you.
- Let's start here. Come with me. - I'm coming.
All together!
Good to see you.
That's right.
- With or without glasses? - I'd say either or both.
- Cheese! - Cheese everybody.
Beautiful, happy people.
Vibrating. I've got hearts.
I've got hearts.
Excuse me!
Can we get some more wine?
Of course. Coffee and the check?
Nothing. Thank you, young man.
Young man?
Let me introduce Julien, a former coworker and old friend,
who turns out to be related to Pierre.
Distantly related.
I'd say, starting from now on, we're a big family.
No, you can't say starting from now on...
Pardon me?
Cheers, everyone.
- What the heck! - What?
On the books, slurping champagne? You're nuts!
Everybody's drinking. It's not my fault I'm on the books.
Get back out there.
Fast!
It's a torrid night tonight!
Let's see you on the dance floor!
Don't let me see anyone sitting down!
On your feet, or I'll ask Pierre for a speech.
Pierre and Helena!
For better or worse!
For us tonight! For you!
All together! Joined in love and dance!
Get on the dance floor for them!
Hands in the air, everyone!
Hey there!
Hey, how you doing?
Another fabulous evening with the James Live Band!
Was that you sending me...
My mistake, have fun.
I wanna feel your skin on my skin.
Let's go everyone!
And now...
Twirl those napkins!
The helicopter of love!
Let's drop the act. It's me you're looking for.
- Pardon me? - First, let me say my piece.
We're a small company, but we always need extra staff.
I'd love to put everyone on payroll, but it's tricky.
Know why?
- Why? - €100 in wages costs me 200.
Not surprising extra staff is off the books!
If nobody helps the little guys, folks are gonna cheat.
To top it all, we're audited, we're hassled.
What happened to the exoneration on payroll taxes for first-time hires?
Everybody whines about youth unemployment, internships,
but nobody tackles the problem.
Go ahead! Search, inspect, audit all you like!
Sink my firm, see if I care!
Take it all! The shirt off my back? Take it!
Slow down.
Keep your clothes on.
My name's Valery Laprade.
We talked by text.
I'm here about my buyout offer.
Laprade!
Valery!
You're Laprade?
That's why I was confused.
That stuff about taxes, youth unemployment...
I got a real fright.
I was wondering what was going on.
Fooled you!
You had me fooled.
What's with the attaché case, Valery? That is the question.
I work for Social Security.
Joke!
Cut it out now because...
False alert.
Sorry if I seemed ridiculous, I was expecting a Valerie.
Your first name is very
unusual.
I suppose this isn't your first misunderstanding.
- Don't worry. - By the way, I'd appreciate discretion.
It's still confidential, the selling up idea.
I understand.
But what a fabulous profession.
It's magic to rub shoulders with happiness.
Yes, it's magic.
Can we talk honestly?
Naturally.
Cash must be a major proportion of your turnover.
Now that's...
You are Laprade?
I don't discuss this with Social Security.
I'd no idea I looked like an inspector.
You look very...
- Yes? - Just fine.
You're
just fine.
I must return the compliment. You're not bad yourself.
Thanks, Valery.
You received my text?
And I replied.
Yes, I guess.
You wrote...
"On arrival, ask for me
"and I'll come lick you up."
No?
It's catastrophic, my autocorrect.
I don't check.
I should, I know.
I thought, we hardly know each other.
No, we hardly know each other.
Here, this is my signed offer.
Thanks.
Let's meet to discuss practicalities.
- Let's keep in touch. - Sure.
We can talk by text.
With or without autocorrect.
- Exactly. - See you soon.
See you.
I hope so. Goodbye.
Valery?
Valery? Come on!
Let's make it a great finale.
Samy, you're sure about the fireworks?
I handled Bastille Day for years when I was at city hall.
The guy's prepped everything. It's a piece of cake.
Seb, you go with him.
We coordinate.
When the groom's surprise is over,
the music fades out.
On my signal, and only on my signal, you launch.
Keep an eye on your phone.
I'll call you with the go.
- Clear? - Or just a text.
Too risky.
Of course, I knew it.
I'll call to say go.
What about the helium girl? She's feeling better?
More or less.
She needs hands on ropes while she supervises.
Adèle and Julien, you stand by to help her.
I'll go check up on dessert.
I'll go with, keep her company.
No, go to the chateau entrance
and keep an eye on the gate to be sure it's solid.
In case it moves.
- I watch the gate? - Yes, watch the gate.
Are you gonna argue with every order?
Alright.
Here we go.
- Here I go. - Exactly.
It's an aerial show, so you wear a parrot costume with orange plumage.
What?
What the heck? That's insane.
The look on your face!
See, I can do it too.
It's in costume again?
Don't worry, not at all.
Coffees, pack up and bed. Hopefully.
Are you ready? We're short on time.
No, we've lost my mother.
I can't start without her.
I'd go find her, but I can't ruin the surprise.
I understand,
but the authorities stipulated half past midnight latest.
It's gonna be tight.
No, not now.
I can't perform without her. It's impossible!
We're on it, we'll find your mother.
Leave it to us.
Yes, Roshan?
- Too bad. - What?
I found a good pretext.
Excellent, keep hold of it. You never know with him.
Evening.
What brings you here?
Guy told me to watch the gate.
I've no idea why. Part of being a job shadow.
Mommy! Where did you get to?
I just needed some air.
- We were frantic, looking for you. - You were?
What's that scent?
A weird smell.
Smell that? Like a funfair?
You stink of churros!
We need to start. Sorry.
Mommy, take your seat.
His nose is so sensitive.
- Really? - Ever since he was a boy.
Ladies and gentlemen, your attention, please.
Yes, me again, sorry.
Please stand and...
Where were you? We looked all over.
- I went for a walk. - Really?
Come.
It's a surprise.
I had no idea.
No, that's why it's a surprise.
Naturally, you had no idea.
What have you been plotting?
We're talking poetry, beauty and love tonight with Helena and Pierre.
Again and again.
It's candy apple flavor.
You didn't! Please tell me you didn't.
She geolocates, c'mon!
It's revolutionary stuff! Geolocation.
- It's an app. I'll explain. - You're a maniac!
What the hell's going on?
The fool!
No way! What are you doing?
Quit jerking it, you idiot!
Julien!
He's wrecking my show!
What the hell!
No way!
You're kidding me.
They really are something else, the French.
You gotta admit.
No kidding, they're so inventive.
They know how to put on a party.
King of clubs?
No.
Of spades?
No.
Queen of hearts?
No. You have no idea, in fact.
They're releasing balloons.
I let one off?
He said he'd call. Has he called?
No.
Let a few go, to see.
I'm confused. Where's my son?
Actually, I think he kind of...
Fresh air will do him good. Come on.
We have a problem.
What's he doing?
I didn't say go.
Motherfucker!
You didn't say go?
No, I didn't say go.
What did I tell you?
It's unbelievable!
I said, we coordinate.
Did I say it or didn't I?
Nobody listens to anybody in this team.
I clear up your blunders all day long.
I drive kilometers to rescue the party.
We struggle, we battle.
But we get there.
And in one minute, you guys fuck it all up!
Know what?
I've had it up to here with every last one of you!
You there, always looking for trouble!
100 times I talked to you.
100 times I asked you to set an example.
You dare talk to me about respect and honor?
Where's your respect for me, Adèle?
Where's your respect, all of you?
Sure, asking me for a truck, a day off, money,
a cousin who needs a job, good old Max!
Thanks, Max! Max saves the day!
What do you guys do for me?
What did I do to deserve you guys my whole life?
No, it's a summer camp for you here!
You, there!
Stuffing your face at the buffet!
Insulting the clients!
Is that how you show your gratitude?
You want the truth, Guy?
Nobody in France wants to work with a nutbar like you!
And that jackass!
Hitting on the bride!
Are you out of your mind?
You're a bunch of deadbeats and losers!
Nobody understands, my life is at stake!
Every function, my life's at stake!
You don't give a shit!
Nobody here gives a shit about me!
Screw the bosses, is that it?
You're sick of the sight of me? I have good news for you.
We're through.
You'll never see me again.
It's over!
He landed in a field 500 meters down the road.
Good news is, he's safe and sound, unhurt.
Sorry again about this.
Bad news is, we're in the dark for an hour.
- What do we do? - Whatever, not my problem.
Deal with it!
Looks like Max is pissed off.
He is, right?
Sure.
Nicole.
No, not a bad time. I'm enjoying a moment.
Peace and quiet.
Like I said, I wanted to talk to you.
How can I say this?
No, go ahead. You called me, go ahead.
Yes, you wanted some perspective.
That's how I interpreted it.
I see, that kind of perspective.
How long?
Alright, that long!
Yeah, sure, of course.
So who's your perspective?
I know him?
No?
Alright.
Look, I've got to get back to the...
Everything's going great, just great.
See you.
Of course!
Blow.
Happy birthday.
You know, Max, I have a theory.
When I'm rock bottom, with the world against me,
I say to myself, it's all relative, I'm imagining things.
You don't know it, but maybe you're in super shape.
Good theory.
Damn good.
Know why it's good? Because it's positive.
I understand you freaking out, but we all make mistakes.
Me too. Even I make mistakes.
Sure, I promise you.
My whole career was based on a mistake.
I was destined to be a photojournalist.
I had no idea.
Tell you about it?
No, I'll pass.
You know, Guy...
We're so...
close, you and me.
I'll be straight with you.
Like I said earlier, when I was a bit...
When I wasn't myself.
The thing is...
It's a battle to get you hired.
Clients...
They don't want a photographer. A cousin or nephew will do.
They refuse a photographer.
I try.
Yes, I see.
I think they need you.
No, I'm going home. I'm beat.
What's going on?
Know what I was thinking up there?
I can imagine.
"If I get down, I'll kill that jackass."
I thought as much.
Just two ropes to hold onto.
If they can't do that...
Where do you find them?
It could've been extremely serious.
It's marvelous.
What a magnificent moment!
Such grace, such harmony...
Seriously, your team is...
quite simply exceptional.
No, really, we're all enchanted.
Exactly what Pierre was saying, in his own way.
More or less?
You saw your mother? She's a new woman, she's radiant.
Yes, she looked pleased.
Happy even.
Thank you.
- From the bottom of my heart. - You're too kind.
We have to say goodbye to the Lemants.
I'll be right there.
Thanks, I guess.
I spoke with Nicole.
We cleared the air.
- No more hiding? - Yes.
And no more kissing Patrice?
Yes. No more.
So? How did she react?
Nicole has a lot of perspective.
That's great with her.
My friends!
Can we talk a minute?
Please.
Don't worry, it's not another long speech.
I just wanted to say...
Thanks for last night.
Seriously...
I was very...
Very touched.
Yeah, very touched.
Starting from now,
whenever you have an issue,
a problem or question,
talk to Adèle.
She'll be the one with all the information.
Over to you.
So, see you Tuesday at The Queen's Salon in Boulogne.
2 pm sharp.
1:30 for heads of department. Briefing and so on.
There you go.
See you Tuesday!
Thank you.
Bye, honey.
See you Tuesday.
Etienne!
Come on, I'll drive you.
If you behave, you'll get a jacket.
You know, Max? I've had it with weddings.
Really?
I'll pick up my career in reportage.
Flirting with danger, in the war zone.
Tricky finding a buffet out there.
I want action on the ground.
It's your call, no problem.
Just kidding, see you Tuesday.
See you Tuesday.
The age gap was too big.
You're right, she's a free spirit.
The uniform's a no-no.
Max and Josiane are together?
Of course, but everybody pretends not to know.
Unbelievable. How come?
That's France. About time you integrated!
Leave you at the corner, like last time?
If folks sees me with you, know what I mean?
Sure, at the corner.
What now? There's nobody to take me home?
Sure, there is.
I will.
That's great, I appreciate it.
- Where are you parked? - I'm on foot.
- You're taking me home on foot? - Right.
Me, personally, I'm happy walking.
"Me, personally" is incorrect. It's faulty syntax.