[knocking on door]
Good, you're here. You can settle this.
- Breanna thinks that... - No, no, no. Let me talk.
Arnaz called and my dad took the message, but he forgot to give it to me.
And we both know what that really means.
Yeah, it means I was shocked the boy could remember seven digits.
Oh, hi, guys, come on in. No, I'm fine, thanks.
- Nice to see you, too. - [chuckles] I'm sorry, baby.
Hugs and kisses. [smooches]
Look, we need your advice. Can you fix her?
Um. I'm not your therapist anymore, Flex.
Don't you remember? That's why you fired me, so, we could...
Get busy. Yeah, that's right. You can say it.
I was going to say have a meaningful relationship.
- Oh. - Yeah, Breanna. Grow up. [Scoffs]
- We still gonna get busy later, right? - Okay.
Well, since she's not going to help us, I just want you to understand
that Arnaz's phone calls are important to me.
[phone ringing]
Not right now, Arnaz. I'm busy.
Now, I'm meeting Spirit at the mall so, we can shop for Grad Night.
So, bye. I'm so glad we worked this out. [chuckles]
You know, I have to admit,
as excited as I am for our first date tonight, I, uh...
- I miss therapy. - Really?
No, 'cause anybody can see you once a week.
I want to see you once you're naked.
[both chuckle]
♪ Sometimes in this life ♪
- ♪ You can feel all by yourself ♪ - ♪ Check one, two ♪
♪ But I have a partner When I can't trust no one else ♪
♪ So, don't isolate yourself ♪
- ♪ When there's nobody around ♪ - ♪ Uh-huh, oh, yeah ♪
♪ I'll be there through thick and thin What a true love we have found ♪
♪ Me and you against the world Living one on one ♪
♪ One on one ♪
♪ Can't nobody break this bond Living one on one ♪
- ♪ Life has just begun. - Now, we're having fun ♪
♪ Living one on one ♪
- ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. ♪ - ♪ One on one ♪
- [upbeat music playing] - [knocking on door, door opens]
Ah-ah-ah, Flex!
I wanted to remind you about our meeting with the accountant tonight.
Payroll taxes are tonight?
[stammers] I... I thought that was next week.
No, you can't blow this off.
I mean, they put people away for not paying their taxes.
And we both know that I'm not pretty enough
to survive in jail like you.
All right, I'll be there. But he better not take too long.
I have a date tonight with Danielle at the Planetarium.
See, I rented it out after hours for a private show. [Laughs]
Man, a Planetarium, huh? [chuckles sarcastically]
Man, who wants to look at fish at night?
No, D, it's... it's a place
where you go to look at the galaxies, and the constellations. It...
Yeah, you're right. She's a really big fan of fish.
But, the point is, it's an important date.
See, I've never had a woman come into my life
and just make everything better.
Yeah, man... [chuckles] it's kind of like me and Candy.
Which is why tonight I'm popping the big question.
Oh, you're going to ask her to stop wearing heels?
No, man, the other big question.
- I'm officially proposing. Uh? - Oh, finally.
I mean, congratulations, bro. [laughs] Yeah.
Yeah, then after that, I'm going to talk to her about the heels thing.
Yeah, yeah.
- I mean, the woman's a tree. [Chuckles] - Oh, yeah.
Although, I don't mind climbing.
[both laugh]
Oh, God. Candy, you have to help me.
This is my first date since my ex-husband.
God, I'm so nervous.
You know, I might just be in my bra and panties
when Flex comes to pick me up.
Well, that'll take care of the small talk.
No. You know, I must admit,
I never really got the whole "Flex" thing.
No. Even when we were kids all the girls liked him.
And all I saw was a skinny kid
who collected farts into a tennis ball can.
He plays tennis, too?
Oh, my God, I love him.
Well, obviously love is blind and has no sense of smell.
[exhales sharply]
So, sit down, girl. Where's he taking you?
I don't know. It's a surprise. All he said was be ready at 9:00.
Mm. That's strange.
Duane has a surprise for me, too.
Wait, you've been dating Duane for a while.
I figured you'd be used to strange.
Girl, don't knock it.
The little mechanic knows his way around this luxury car.
[Arnaz] Bre, I cannot believe this.
Five luxury buses with TV's and reclining seats,
and we get stuck on the short bus because of Spirit.
We're late because of A-Train.
It's not her fault her boyfriend's a flake.
Oh, and don't worry, we won't tell anyone
this isn't your first time on the short bus.
Thanks, baby. Hey, Greg.
Look, no helmet. [Laughs]
Thanks a lot for ruining my Grad Night, A-Train.
It's not like I haven't been looking forward to this for months.
I don't see how this night could get much worse.
Yeah, thanks for showing me.
All right, listen up. Hands where I can see them.
And lips.
Thank you.
Now, I'm going to be on the other bus,
because, well, because I can be. [chuckles]
Brad, as class president,
I know I can count on you to keep this bus in line.
That's right, Miss Laurel.
I brought flash cards and juice boxes.
Greg here is going to be my eyes and ears. So, behave.
She's gone. Let's get this party crackin'.
[raps] ♪ Ain't no party, oh, oh! Like a short bus party, oh, oh! ♪
♪ 'Cause a short bus party, oh-oh Don't stop ♪
Boo-ya! Who's up for a juice box, baby?
I can't believe we're stuck here with a bunch of nerds.
This is supposed to be one of our last great nights
before we graduate.
Before we end up going our separate ways.
Why wait? There's an empty seat back there.
Spirit, don't go.
Tsk. I'll see you guys at Busch Gardens.
Hey, you're Spirit, right?
Cheer up, girl. You're on the party bus.
There's no room for depression. That's what our 30s are for.
I must be growing old prematurely.
You look young and hot to me.
Hey.
Here.
[coughs] What the heck is that?
Uh. Just a little bourbon and Mango Madness.
A little something I like to call the "McKinley Feel Good."
Well, good is something I need to feel right now,
thanks to my so-called boyfriend.
- Here's to my crappy life. - To Spirit's crappy life.
[upbeat music playing]
D, where is that accountant, man?
I'm going to be late for my date with Danielle.
Now, he's got ten minutes, and then I gots to go.
Oh, me, too. But I can't wait that long.
What... Man, there's something's wrong with this sandwich.
This mortadella is morta-deadly.
Oh. I'll be in my other office.
[Flex] Oh, finally, man. You're late.
We got to hurry up. I have another appointment.
Believe you me.
I'm going to make this as quick as I can.
Ah. I see we take casual Fridays very seriously. [Chuckles]
- I take this very seriously, too. - Hey! [Stammers]
False alarm. [Chuckles]
Hey, man, weren't you in here last week looking for a job?
Uh. Did I tell you... Uh. You're hired? [chuckles]
- Hey, you got... you got the job. - Yeah. You're welcome.
[stammers] Is it two bunny ears through the rabbit hole?
Or is it a rabbit hole through the bunny ears?
[stammers] Come on, man.
Look, the night deposit is on the desk in an envelope.
Just-just take it and go. I got a big date tonight.
Oh, a big date.
I guess it's easy when you got money,
a car, and a job.
Uh. Don't forget good looks.
- We can change that. - Oh, oh, oh.
Hey, look, if you want me to hook you up with somebody,
I... I can do that, but you're going to have to go home
and change your clothes first.
Hey, you never hooked me up with anybody.
Because you never held up a gun to my head.
Oh, now you tell me. Just as I'm about to get married.
- You don't even know him! - Man, the two of you shut up!
- All right, all right, all right. - I'm not settling for the night deposit.
This place is high end. You got MHT wheels,
Asanti, Bose sound systems, Alpine,
and you deal a lot in cash, so, I know you got a safe.
- Oh, do you now? Huh? - No, no, no.
But did you know that the safe is behind the Leather Shine display?
Did you know that?
Huh. Change the subject.
Welcome to D's Dubs and Subs. How may I help you? [Chuckles]
♪ I will survive ♪
♪ As long as I know how to love ♪
♪ I know I'll stay alive ♪
Spirit is having way too good a time. What do you think is going on?
I can tell you what's not going on, us. This is our Grad Night.
You should be thinking about me. Because I'm thinking about...
Never mind, you don't want to know what I'm thinking about.
I'm sorry, baby. You're right.
Tonight is about us and the end of our high school years.
♪ Hey, hey ♪
That was a musical interlude, everyone. [chuckles]
Wait, I'm just going to go remind Spirit of how important tonight is.
Hey, girl.
Hey... hey... hey, Spirit, what's up?
Not much.
'Sup wit'choo?
Ew, girl, how many of these have you had?
"McKinley Feels Good"?
Let's just say I feels McKinley great.
Girl, you better cool it before the driver tells Miss Laurel that you're drunk.
No, no, it's not a problem. I'm helping Greg get his GED.
Mum's the word. Right, Greg?
You know drinking is not going to solve anything.
That's easy for you to say. Your boyfriend's always here.
Do you know how many times I've watched you guys make out?
It's like Cinemax.
Not that I don't love you. 'Cause I do.
I love you so much.
And you are so drunk.
Is this how you want to remember your Grad Night?
[whispers] Shh, let me tell you a secret. Come here, come here.
Do you want to know
the real reason A-Train didn't come tonight?
I wouldn't put out!
The trash. [Laughs awkwardly] She wouldn't put it out.
Girl, how many boyfriends have you lost because of this?
Spirit, I put out.
Oh. Fine, you know, I'll give your number to A-Train.
He's looking for a party girl.
[upbeat music playing]
Flex, it's now 9:30 and you're late.
And if this was a video phone, you would see how angry I am,
- and how hot I look. - [knock on door]
Oh, man, are you lucky.
You were this close to never seeing me naked.
Girl, I saw you naked at the spa.
You... you're a'iight.
Candy, what are you doing here? Why aren't you with Duane?
Because he's not home.
He told me to meet him at his place at 9:00.
And I got there right on time. 9:15.
Now, it's 9:30 and I haven't seen or heard from him.
- I haven't heard from Flex, either. - You know, Duane told me they had
a meeting with their accountant after work.
Wait. What kind of accountant meets after regular business hours?
The kind who deducts a night at Hooters as a business expense.
Why would they do that when they have dates with us?
They're men and they think they can have it all.
Oh, they'll get all worked up on tight tank tops and hot wings,
then come back up in here without even a phone call
- or a damn doggy bag. - [exhales]
- Men suck. - Mm-hmm.
And you know what goes good with man hating? Wine.
[exhales sharply] How could they be so mean and inconsiderate?
No, not that kind of wine.
I'm talking about the kind you drink.
- Red or white? - Whichever box is open.
We're here.
Chug 'em if you got 'em!
- Come on, Spirit, get up. - I can't.
My up is down.
All right, everybody off.
Are you all right, Spirit?
Uh. Yeah, it's just a little motion sickness.
I'm going to stay here with her.
All right, well, I'll check on you later.
Check on them later.
There's no reason for her to ruin both our nights, is there?
But, Arnaz, Spirit needs us.
What? No one told her to get drunk.
Just prop her up. Greg will watch her.
[giggles] I am so drunk.
Good times!
I don't feel good, Breanna.
[retches]
[Brad] Hey, who's throwing the pizza?
[upbeat music playing]
Come on. C... can I call up Danielle?
Please, man, this is our first date.
Man, you can call her when the safe is open.
Okay, okay. Uh. Eighteen, 25.
- Man, I'm... I'm too nervous to remember. - Does this help, punk?
Uh. You know what? I want to open up this thing as much as you do.
I have a diamond engagement ring in there.
[both] Oh.
Are you going to want that, too? [chuckles]
Stop messing around and open it.
All right, all right, man. That's not helping, all right?
All right, I know it's 18 to the left
because that's how old I was when I left my virginity. [Chuckles]
And 25 to the right,
because that's how old I was the next time I had sex.
And that's just not right.
Man, you weren't 18, you were 22. I remember because I paid.
- Has he always been this dumb? - I don't know.
We only been friends since he was five.
Well, here's another dumb thing.
He about to put this Viper on these 22s.
They look all right, but 18s will hug the road better.
Man, you gonna ruin this car just to make a dollar? Shame on you.
All right, man. Says the guy holding the gun.
Oh, just kidding, man.
Man, how come you didn't tell me you knew this much about cars
- when you came in for a job? - You ain't give me a chance.
That's because you came in here dressed like a thug,
and oh, what do you know, you're a thug.
Well, when I came in, you was dressed like a idiot,
and oh, what do you know, you're a idiot.
Man, you got one more minute to open that safe.
Uh-oh.
You been punk'd.
I'm just gonna go outside and get Ashton.
You ain't going nowhere...
Sit down. Sit down.
Give me that. That's a fake gun.
- I thought you were tied up. - And you made a slip knot, Duane.
Man, no wonder my shoes keep falling off.
Man, I wasn't going to hurt nobody.
Just trying to get a little money.
Well, that's not the way you go about it, little brother.
Easy for you to say, Mr. Fla-dapp Man.
Oh, snap, you watch my show?
Look, man, it's not like I haven't been trying to do the right thing.
You don't know what kind of pressure I'm under.
I got a kid on the way. You don't know my life.
Man, I don't want to hear none of that.
You don't know what I know, man.
What what if we give you a job?
What? Man, you're offering him a job? Flex, he pulled a gun on us.
Man, what would you have done if he'd shot me, adopted him?
- "Come on, little thug." - Come here, man.
Look, D, this kid could have been us
if we didn't get the breaks that we did.
That was a fake gun.
Now, if we turn him in, what... what good is that going to do?
Next time, it's gonna be a real gun.
I say we give the kid a chance.
I don't know.
Oh. Oh, hey! Hey, where you going, man?
We're talking about giving you a job, and you're trying to sneak off?
Oh, and you were serious?
What kind of fool gives somebody a job that was going to rob them?
You obviously don't know what kind of fool you're dealing with.
Come here, man, just come here.
[sighs]
You know what? I'll take another look at your application, all right?
Why don't you come back here tomorrow, and we'll talk about it?
- All right. - All right.
- Okay. - Now, get out of here.
And wear a tie.
- Uh. What if this doesn't work out? - Good luck.
After all, it's not like I'm here every day. Let's roll.
[both singing] ♪ R-E-S-P-E-C-T ♪
♪ Find out what it means to me ♪
- ♪ R-E-S-P-E-C-T ♪ - Oh.
[both singing] ♪ Take care of T-C-B ♪
♪ I said, sock it to me, sock it to me Sock it to me, sock it to me ♪
♪ Sock it to me sock it to me... ♪
I'd like to sock it to Duane.
- [gasps] I know what this is. - Mm.
This is the therapy gods punishing me for falling in love with my client.
- [door opens] - Baby, I am so sorry we're late.
You'll never guess what happened to us.
Baby, we were robbed. At fake gunpoint.
Yeah, yeah, but we didn't know it was fake.
Well, Duane never does.
Uh. Baby, there's a difference between knowing and caring.
Flex, give me a break. I know you were at Hooters.
You know, you don't show me any R-E-S-P-C-T...
- Tell him, girl. - Uh... Danielle...
look into my eyes, okay? I would never lie to you.
What I told you was true.
I wish it weren't, 'cause I went through a lot of trouble to...
give you a big surprise tonight.
Yeah, Candy, and I...
- I had a big surprise for you too... - Mm-hmm.
But I guess it's going to have to wait
because I couldn't get the ring out of the safe.
Uh? "Ring"? W... wh... what kind of ring?
Engagement ring.
Candace Taylor... will you be my wife?
- Yes! - Oh, yeah! [Laughs]
Now, get on up, so, we can go get that ring.
All right.
Oh. My head is killing me.
This is worse than when my weave is too tight.
Look, I know you're upset about A-Train,
but if you had slept with him and then found out he was a jerk,
im... imagine how much worse you would feel.
But I finally had a boyfriend.
I went into high school a loser, and I was coming out a winner.
Now I'm just a loser again.
Having a man does not make you a winner.
Having friends makes you a winner.
But all I have is you and Arnaz.
I didn't say how many friends.
Now, just sit back and relax your weave.
[knock on door]
- What are you doing here? - I felt bad about Spirit.
And you got my wallet in your purse.
But mostly, I felt bad about Spirit.
Are you still mad at me, Arnaz?
I'm not mad, I'm disappointed. It was Grad Night.
It was supposed to be the three of us, and you missed it 'cause you were drunk.
Arnaz, it was one time. It's not like I have a problem.
That's what my mom used to say.
Oh, your mom.
- I'm so sorry, Arnaz. I'm such an idiot. - Yeah, you are.
But you're our idiot.
Oh, I love you guys. Group hug.
- [whispers] Oh, you guys are the greatest. - Yeah, say it down there.
Your breath is kicking like karate.
[upbeat music playing]
- Look at it, baby. - [both laugh]
Hey... hey, where are you guys?
- I want to show Danielle Candy's ring. - Mm-hmm.
Oh, Duane, baby, it is their first date. Maybe they want to be alone.
You remember our first date?
- [both] Mmm. - [both laugh]
You think they're playing Scattergories with my mama?
After the Scattergories, Duane.
- Oh. Oh! - [both giggle]
- You know, we should probably go, huh? - [both laugh]
[continue laughing]
- I wanted tonight to be special. - Oh, I'm just glad you're all right.
Well, it wasn't completely shot.
If you look off into the distance right there,
you'll see a little star that the universe will forever call,
"Danielle four-five-K- nine-seven-Q-R-one."
[chuckles softly] Oh. You had a star named after me?
Oh, there were flowers and chocolates and a string quartet involved too, but...
This was the most amazing first date.
- "Was"? I ain't finished. - There's more?
- Yes. You've seen the star. - [chuckles]
Now, I'm gonna take you inside and, uh, fly you to the moon.
[both chuckle]
- ♪ One on one ♪ - ♪ Yeah ♪
- ♪ One on one ♪
♪ One on one ♪
- ♪ One on one ♪ - ♪ Uh-huh, yeah ♪
♪ One on one ♪
- Love you, Daddy. - Love you, too, Nellie.