## [Man Singing: Alternative Folk] [Moans]
Oh. I'm so hungover, my hair hurts.
Mmm. Good morning, starshine.
What are you doing here?
We didn't. Did we?
The answer to most of those questions is "tequila."
Oh, my God. All right, you better tell me what happened.
You mean you don't remember? Tequila's like amnesia in a bottle for me.
I really don't remember. Well, it all started yesterday morning.
I remember yesterday morning. Fast-forward to last night.
Whoa, whoa, whoa. It's my story, and I want it to start yesterday morning.
We just took down Jimmy Ning.
Nice. [People Cheering]
Can I buy you a drink?
Raw vegetable juice? No. Seven days is long enough.
I was thinking of something a little stronger.
So, you agree to meet me for a drink.
All I gotta do is give a statement to Las Vegas Metro before I head back to Boston.
Which I do quick fast. Then I jam back to the Montecito to come meet you.
Wow. [Chuckles]
[Voice Mail] This is Sam. You've almost reached me.
Leave a message, and I'll get right back to you.
Uh, hey, Sam. It's Woody, again-
leaving, like, the second, third, 10th message on your voice mail.
Uh, I got your drink here waiting in the casino.
Um, anyhoo, you know what?
You probably can't get through to me 'cause I only got, like, one bar down here.
So it's probably going straight to voice mail. And, uh, I'm pretty sure you got my number.
So, um, yeah.
Woody. Casino. Waiting.
[Dealer] Your bet, sir. Okay.
Yeah, toodles.
Uh, that was my casino host.
Battery on her cell is probably dead.
Whoa. Hold those cards. Hold those cards.
One, two, three, four, five.
Money plays.
Money plays. Five dollars.
Can we get a cocktail around here? I thought they were free in these parts.
Cocktail.
[Woody] You had no intention of calling me back. [Sam] None whatsoever.
How was Boston? Hot.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Jordan?
I invited her back for the weekend. Get out.
[Murmurs] Ah, the doc came back with you.
No, no. I said I invited her back. I didn't say she was coming.
Oh, I see how you're playin' it. I think she's-
I see how you're playin' it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know that's a wig.
Yeah, I know. You just take away the hair and the glasses.
[Ed] Mmm. Wow. Now, you see.
This man over here, unlike you, goes- goes the extra mile. Yeah.
And that's why he's so well liked. Mm-hmm.
- I'm worried about you. - I knew he had a wig on. - Then we run facial.
Hey, that's Gabe. That's Nice Guy Gabe.
Listen, this is the only card counter that I 86'ed-
He tipped the dealer, and he said "Thank you" when I threw him out.
- Nice guy. - Yep. "Gabe Labrador."
Forty-seven. A.K.A. Nice Guy Gabe. A.K.A. Gabe the Gent.
- Card counter. - Now you know why I'm down here.
Because I miss all the fun, 'cause I'm upstairs.
You would've figured it out. Of course.
So, I'll call down and have them show him the door.
No, no, no. No, no. I'll go retrieve the Labrador.
"Retrieve the Labrador." That's really good there. Yeah, I heard.
The wig isn't fooling anybody.
Time to go. I need to play some more, so get lost.
- It's not a request, Gabe. Come on. - You do not understand.
You don't understand then.
- How much did he buy in for? - He bought in for a thousand.
- Give him the thousand back. Come on. - What about the money I won?
What about it? You're black-booked, Gabe.
You're not entitled to your winnings. Now, come on. Get up.
You- Let go of me. Look, I need that money.
All right, come on.
[People Exclaim] [Yelps]
[Grunts] Son of a bitch.
- I wanna see Ed Deline. - I'm callin' Metro.
I'm gonna recommend they officially take "Nice Guy" out of your alias.
Ah. I'm sorry. Look, no B.S.
This is a matter of life and death. I gotta see Ed Deline.
Ed, thank God. I got a call. She's not in school. I checked.
Gabe, you gotta slow down.
Why? Why did you hit Danny?
I heard her voice. They've got Millie.
- I gotta win that money. - Who's "they"?
I don't know. They kidnapped my daughter.
She's only 16.
- [Knocks] Metro's here. - They said no cops.
They put her on the phone, Ed. She's scared.
They gave me eight hours to win a million dollars.
- Or what? - Or they're gonna kill my daughter.
# Boy, you feelin' lucky tonight #
# Roll the dice again and let it ride #
# Let it ride Let it ride #
# You gonna do this one more time #
# Hit me again and let it ride #
# Let it ride Let it ride #
# Are you gonna play tonight #
# 'Cause Lady Luck is right by your side #
# By your side By your side #
# Gonna do this one more time #
# Hit me again and let it ride #
# Let it ride, let it ride Let it ride, let it ride ##
I'm up a little, I'm down a little- waitin' for you to call me back.
Which I had no intention of doing. We've already established that.
When a familiar face appears.
Woody. Hey, Mike.
Hey. Hey, big props on Jimmy Ning.
Yeah. Have you seen Sam anywhere? Yeah. She's around here somewhere.
Just call her. She's never without her cellphone.
You got her number? Yeah, I got it. Thank you.
Seriously, it's, like, surgically attached.
She always picks up after one ring. Watch. Call her. Thank you. I understand.
I gotta take care of somethin', but track me down before you go. Okay.
You should call her. Yeah. I-
Chicks, man. [Scoffs] Tell me about it.
You find yourself doin' things you swore you never would.
I tell you what mine's gonna do. Mine's gonna kill me.
Why? What'd you do?
I lost my ass at the tables.
I'm maxed out on my credit card.
I'm supposed to take my wife to dinner tonight. It's our anniversary.
The A.T.M. won't spit 20s until midnight.
[Dealer] Twenty-one. Sorry.
Look. I know this sounds-
If you could loan me the hundred. Oh.
I'd pay you back in a few hours.
I can't.
You could even hold my wedding ring as collateral.
I'll hit the A.T.M. at midnight.
I'll meet you at the Opus Bar at 12:15.
All right. Uh, here.
There you go.
Thanks, bro. See ya at 12:15.
Thanks.
Happy anniversary.
[Sam] Sucker.
I told you. They said no cops.
You gotta let me outta here. I've been off the floor too long.
Gabe. I, uh- I called your daughter's cell.
It picked up after one ring.
- Southern Nevada Wireless said it's been turned off. - So, they turned it off.
We also ran a dump on your cell, Gabe.
No calls to or from any numbers you hadn't previously called.
Don't you see? They are using her phone to call me.
In 1980, you faked your death to collect on an insurance policy.
- You did seven years. - That was a long time ago.
Look, I know this looks bad. But I'm telling you-
If you're trying to dodge some Gaming Control beef by making up a kidnapping story,
I'm telling you right now it's not gonna play.
Ed. Ed.
[Door Opens, Closes]
Let me call a car for transport. We'll take him for the assault.
What assault?
I thought he hit Danny. He did.
Well, you call it assault. We call it a misunderstanding. We'll take it from here. Thanks.
[Jernigan] Don't tell me you believe this kidnapping garbage?
What, you got a soft spot for this guy?
I'm really sorry we made you come out here for nothin'.
[Sighs] You did a great job with the place, Ed. Even better than Wynn.
What are you doing?
Look. Labrador- He's pulled a- a lifetime of schemes. He's never hurt a fly.
But today he decides to jump up and hit a guy, 6 foot 4, in the mouth.
So you do believe him. I mean, look at him.
He's all fidgety, like he's gotta get the hell outta there.
That's because he knows we're watching him. He's not that good an actor.
Okay, I do believe him. I do.
Ed. Ben Carlson's waiting for you at the sports book.
- Who? - Ben Carlson.
- Who the hell's Ben Carlson? - The guy who won the 600K.
Okay. Look, Danny.
Just meet me up on that second-floor overlook in about 20 minutes, all right?
[People Cheering]
[Slurping]
- Mr. Carlson. - Hmm?
Hi. I'm Ed Deline. I'm president and chief operating officer here. Hi. I'm Ben Carlson.
How ya doin', Ben? Good.
Great. Listen, I understand you've had quite a run of luck.
There's approximately $600,000 in this bag. Mm-hmm?
I wanna give it back. You wanna give it, uh, back to who?
I wanna give it back to you.
I'm sorry?
I have a fundamental objection to gambling, Mr. Deline.
I don't want this money. I see.
I don't get to hear that a lot. As a matter of fact, this-This is a first.
Mm-hmm. I didn't ask to meet you to set some sort of precedent.
I merely wanted to return these ill-gotten gains.
You won it. Um, maybe-
Maybe you could just give it away.
Dirty money does not become unsullied through acts of benevolence.
I really... do... insist that you take it back.
You see, legally, we can't do that.
I mean, you won it, and it's yours.
Oh. This is not gonna do.
This is just not gonna do. I don't want this money!
I don't want that!
[Gasping] I feel so sick.
- Hmm? - I feel so nauseous.
- [Moans] - I'll tell you what.
The Montecito can hold this money for you in an escrow-type of way.
And if you should change your mind, it'll be there, you know?
[Giggling] Thank you.
Okay. All right.
But, you know, rest assured, my convictions are steadfast.
Right. And unwavering.
Right. It's good to see you.
Very, very nice to see you. Yeah.
So let's just recap here. I'm now down six bills.
I've lent another hundred to a complete and total stranger.
And I've called you, like, 12 times.
Seventeen. Caller I.D.
Oh, man. I don't even have a nationwide calling plan.
By any accounts, not what one would call a lucky day.
But all that was about to change.
[People Cheering]
[Sam] Mr. Silani, is everything okay?
Besides the fact that I'm down 400,000?
That's my daughter- with the dog.
[Chattering]
Marjhan. She thinks she's the Persian Paris Hilton.
She does appear to be very popular.
She wants to go to all the best nightclubs.
- She even made me a list. - Oh. A list.
"Tangerine, Rain, Pure, Light." No problem. She's in.
I want her protected full-time.
Yes. Consider it done. We have fantastic security.
No rent-a-cops.
Well, Metro's not allowed to moonlight as bodyguards, but I-
Are you telling me no, Sam? Well-
I'll understand if you are.
But I'm sure you'll understand when I take my business to Bellagio.
[Woman] It is a winner. [People Cheering]
[Clears Throat] Actually-
There is one guy.
[Woody] If Mr. Silani didn't have that scratchy five-o'clock shadow,
I would've kissed him right then and there.
Excuse me. I'm looking for Danny McCoy.
Aren't we all?
[Danny] What did the kidnapper say exactly?
He said he knows I'm a counter. He said I need to win a million dollars.
He said that he would call me back and tell me where to bring the money.
What did he sound like? Was he young? Old?
Did he have an accent or something? He just sounded like a guy.
A guy. Are they gonna be able to see us up here?
They said no cops. We're not cops.
- I need to get back to the tables. - We can't do that.
- Let me go to another casino. We're running out of time. - Do me a favor. Take it easy.
If we catch a card counter, we have to notify Gaming Control.
Then every casino in Nevada will be on the lookout for you. You see?
- We're okay? - Yeah.
Here. Let's put this in your ear.
See, now you can hear us, and, better,
we can hear you no matter where you go.
Just head down to the floor and case the tables...
like you're lookin' for just the right situation.
And we'll be watching you.
Whoa. Now, if you should decide to head for an exit,
don't bother comin' back, because, uh, you'll be on your own.
Okay.
I gotta take care of somethin'. See you guys in a bit.
Think he'll bail? Well, if he does, his story will be crap, right?
And if he stays? Well, then it would be quite the opposite.
And maybe we'll catch us a bad guy, right?
[Danny] Penny Posin. You're right on time.
I know it's a little premature, but I got a little excited,
so I went by the house again yesterday and I took some pictures.
Look, Penny, I'm not even sure I'm ready to sell.
These are pretty nice.
We can do a virtual tour on the Internet- 360 view of every room.
How much is this gonna cost? It's included in the listing.
I'm full-service.
Okay. Well, uh, let's say that I am ready. Then what?
You're gonna want to know what you can expect.
Uh, in the current market, the best strategy...
is to price low enough to draw multiple bids,
and then you counter above asking to maximize the price.
Well, how low is low? I'm thinking 1 .9. Maybe two.
Two? As in million?
That's just to draw immediate interest. Really, it'll go much higher.
- You gotta be kidding me. - Is that not okay?
Nah. No, it's way- way better than okay.
Great. Now we just gotta find someplace to put that money.
Uh, another house?
Vegas is growing up, not out.
I'm talkin' high-rise, Danny.
Walls of glass. "Master of the universe" views.
I can't afford that, can I? Yeah, you can.
Okay, well, I guess there's no harm in looking.
Great. I'll set it up for tonight. Okay.
[People Cheering]
Thanks. You're welcome.
You Deline?
Yeah. Yeah.
Um, feeling better, Mr. Carlson?
Who's Carlson? I'm Tad Waters.
Who's Tad Waters? You're Carlson.
- What, do you have a twin? - No. But you got my 600K.
And the cage says they can't release it until you put your signature on it.
So why don't you just get on that, chop-chop?
I'm Tad Waters.
Just a little while ago, you didn't want it. You just chucked it over here.
You're tryin' to welsh on me, aren't you, son?
If you want to, we can settle this thing outside right now.
But you probably got an army of goons...
who'd jump all over me before I broke off my first roundhouse.
So why don't you just forget about outside?
I want my money, "Devine."
You got an hour,
bitch.
[Phone Beeping]
- [Ed] Hey, Mike. - Hmm?
Listen to this. That guy Carlson who won the money? Yeah.
Now he wants it. I thought he said it made him sick.
I know. Now he comes up to me demanding the cash.
Check him out. Maybe he's got a twin or somethin'.
What's goin' on with Gabe? [Danny] Nothin'.
It doesn't look like anyone's watching him either. [Mike] Gabe, any contact?
[Gabe] Contact negative. I repeat-negative.
This guy's scammin' us.
[Cellphone Rings]
[Girl On Cellphone] Daddy? Millie?
- Oh, my God. Millie? Oh, my God! - Help me.
[Whispering] It was her. It was her.
Calm down, Gabe. Sit down at an empty blackjack table.
We'll send someone to get you.
[Footsteps Approaching] [Monica] Poor bastard.
- Monica, can I help you? - Give him the money.
I don't know. He still may be griftin' us.
- How old is the daughter? - Sixteen.
- Why didn't you tell me about this? - Well, truthfully, my dear-
If I thought you had the heart, I would have.
Let's have him sign this before you give him the money.
If the daughter lives, I want the movie rights.
[Laughing] The movie rights.
She's serious.
Jordan Cavanaugh. I'm checking in.
Yes, ma'am. I'll take care of that for you.
I guess you found one of those flying rooms after all, huh?
Hey, how are you? Great.
You look beautiful. Thank you.
I should've known you'd surprise me before I could find you.
Is this a good time? We are kind of in the middle of something right now.
I'm sorry. Spontaneity- I should've called. No, no.
I'm glad you're here. It shouldn't take more than a few hours.
You're probably exhausted from the flight. I'm gonna call downstairs, set you up at the spa.
- You can relax, take it easy. I'll call you when I'm done. - Okay. Hey.
The thing you're in the middle of- What is it? [Quietly] Uh, kidnapping.
Really?
[Woody] So, I'm still in the casino waiting for your call.
- [Beeping] - Hey. Woody.
I've been looking for you everywhere.
The old "don't call back so you make it look like the other guy's fault" trick.
Yeah. That's my specialty.
You're so funny. Hey, listen, I need a little favor.
You hurt my feelings. No.
I have a client who wants a cop to bodyguard for his beautiful daughter.
No. It pays 2,000 a night.
No. I'll come with and pretend like I'm madly in love with you.
Okay. Folded like a cheap lawn chair.
Hey, I just gotta make sure that I'm back here by midnight.
[Woody] And so we begin Phase 1 of my master plan.
You're gonna give me a million dollars?
- [Cellphone Ringing] - What do I do?
Give me your phone.
Hello. [Man] You're not playing blackjack, Gabe.
I had to- I had to stop for a while. I didn't want the eye in the sky to get suspicious.
Where's Millie? Actually, I don't give two craps how you get the money.
Gamble, borrow, beg, steal it if you have to. Just get it.
- Let me talk to Millie. - Timetable's moved up.
Get the money in three hours, or Millie's dead.
Trace isn't working. It's being call-forwarded through a pay phone.
You hear me, Gabe?
I have the money. Good.
Now go to the Montecito gift shop and buy a magazine and a ChapStick.
- Tell them you want a bag. - What magazine?
It doesn't matter what magazine.
Take it out of the bag and throw it into the trash can outside the gift shop door.
Put the money in the bag. What about the ChapStick?
Use it. Your lips look terrible.
[Dial Tone]
Then we finally arrive at number three on the Persian Paris Hilton's crackin' club list-
Pure.
## [Woman Singing: Funk]
## [Continues]
[Sighs] I'm bored.
We just got here.
Where's the waitress? I'm getting another lemon drop.
Hey.
Hey. What's up with you?
[Sighs] Nothing.
No guys are hitting on me.
Well, that's 'cause you're trying too hard to be cool.
But I'm cute. Right?
Are you kidding? You're a tomato.
[Laughs]
You like her, huh? Is it that obvious?
Mmm.
Well, you're not doing anything about it.
You know what? You're right.
You want something bad enough, you can't be afraid to make a statement.
Hey, you. Hey.
The place is amazing. It's doing better than ever, huh?
Revenue's up 30%. I'm exhausted.
You miss Mystique a little bit.
I have total freedom here, Sam.
I don't have to tell you working for my father's not always a picnic. Mmm.
Wait. Is that Boston Woody?
The cop? Yeah.
So? He's kinda cute.
Whatever.
[Sam] Wait. How do you know what me and Delinda were talking about?
You weren't even there. It's my story. I'll tell it my way.
# You think he's hot You think he's hot #
# Mm-mmm, mm-mmm #
Okay, bro? Thank you. Thank you. [Needle Scratches Record]
[Deejay] This one goes out to Marjhan. ## [Up Tempo]
Marjhan. Marjhan. You ready for this?
Wait. You ready? Just follow. Ready? Here we go. Here we go.
## [Woman Singing: Afro Pop] Out. In. Mmm.
Out. In. Hop, hop.
Work it! Mmm!
Yeah! Uh! Here! Uh! Mmm!
Work it out. Work it in. Gimme some of that.
[Laughing]
It's kinda dorky, but kinda cool.
Oh-ho! Oh, yeah!
- I'm jumpin' in. - [Sighs]
Out. Work it in. Gimme some of that.
Work that! Mmm! Oh, yeah!
Ah, yes!
Work it!
Work it out. Work it in.
Work it! Mmm! Mmm!
You know you got it goin'. Uh!
## [Continues]
Get down. Mmm!
That's what I'm talkin' about. That's what I'm talkin' about.
- Woo-Woody. - Hey, hey.
Woody. Come on, come on. What's goin' on here?
- Piss off, partner! - Woody.
[Groaning]
- Woody, are you okay? - You're breakin' my arm!
Shut up! I'm fine.
It's almost midnight.
## [Fades Out]
[Woody] Phase 1: Boy impresses girl. Check.
[Mike] There is no Ben Carlson.
There are 272 Ben or Benjamin Carlsons in the U.S.
None of them is our guy. Our Ben Carlson doesn't exist.
I don't wanna hear it. What about Tad Waters?
There's a porn star named Tad Waters, but he's definitely not our guy.
Are you sure? I got pictures if you wanna see 'em.
No thanks. I'll pass. I figured as much. And about three dozen others.
Maybe they're twins. One guy's a gambler, and the other one is, like, a nerdy guy.
That's a good call, but wouldn't they both have the same last name? Right.
Let me tell you somethin', Mike.
Ambiguous situations like this- Well, they make me agitated.
And agitated is about an inch and a half from angry. And I'm talkin' really angry.
I'll find out who he is- they are.
Right.
Hey. Hey, you.
How's it goin' over there? Slow.
Your dad saved a lotta stuff.
Oh, my God. You gotta be kidding me.
My Joe Charboneau rookie card. [Chuckles]
This guy could open a beer bottle with his eye socket. No wonder you liked him so much.
Where did you find this? In a box marked "Danny's Favorites."
Your dad saved everything from your baby shoes to your high school diploma.
I gotta go. I'm late for lunch with Jake.
Thank you, Mary. I mean it, for everything.
Eh, don't mention it, McCoy.
You were my rookie of the year too.
So you used to date Danny too?
Yeah, for, like, a second and a half.
What's that they say about not pooping where you eat?
[Chuckles] I don't buy that at all.
I think it's totally natural to go out with people you work with.
So, what about you and Woody?
Oh, well, that's a whole nother can of worms right there.
The least Danny could've done is taken the day off for you.
He said that he and your dad were working on a, uh, kidnapping.
Oh, those two are always up to something. Kidnapping, "schmidnapping."
I wanted to help out, but I didn't want to look like I was interfering.
And Danny told me to come down to the spa and just chill out.
Girl, you're a medical examiner with the city of Boston.
You should do whatever you wanna do.
You know what? You're right.
Chill out, my ass. Yeah. Exactly.
Thanks a- [Grunts]
Um, Delinda, could you give me a hand here? Oh, yeah. Just-
I'm over here, on your left. Okay.
Both Ben Carlson and Tad Waters are registered at the hotel. Okay?
Okay. Here's Ben's room.
- Now... Tad's. - You ever see these guys together?
- No. - Because they're the same guy.
- I got a theory. - Yeah?
- Multiple personalities. - Like what- Sybil?
You said it yourself. This is the same guy. And yet we've never seen 'em together.
Of course we never saw 'em together! Because it's the same guy, you moron!
But we're still holding the money. Just let me do a little bit more research.
- Multiple personalities. - Yes.
I'm gonna tell you what, Mike. If some kid in a trucker hat...
jumps out at me and says "You've been punked,"
I'm kickin' him and you right in the pills, okay?
It's time.
So, it's midnight, and we're back at the Montecito.
Feed me that? No.
Thank you, Woody. Mmm!
Thank you, Sam, for everything. Good night.
Good night.
Yes, I know. You did a good thing.
Where's your "wedding ring" guy?
Looks like he flaked on me. Hmm. What's this?
[Bartender] Tequila. From Miss Mancuso.
�Salud!
Ah! Mr. Silani called.
- You checkin' up on me? - Apparently, he's thrilled.
His daughter said she had the time of her life.
Told me to give you a raise. Thank Woody.
I'm Monica Mancuso.
Hi. I'm Woody Hoyt.
What do you do, Woody? I'm a detective with the Boston Police Department.
- Impressive. - And you, Monica? What do you do?
- Well, this nice place- I own it. - Ah. That's, uh, even more impressive.
Let me ask you something, Woody. Do you think it's appropriate for a Boston police officer...
to have his hand on the thigh of the owner of a billion-dollar hotel and casino?
Uh, you tell me.
No.
Maybe you could do me a little favor here.
Maybe you could whisper something in my ear...
and make it look like my hand on your thigh is extremely appropriate.
[Whispering] You're pretty. I just hope everything works out.
If it doesn't, don't you worry about a thing.
[Woody] Phase 2: Boy uses Girl "B" to make Girl "A" jealous.
Jordan? Mike! Hey!
Where's Danny? How long you here for?
That's kind of up in the air. I really wanna see- Wait, wait. You're an M.D., right?
Yeah, but I'm- Any psychology training?
Oh, actually, that was my subspecialty.
Have you ever encountered a subject with multiple personality disorder?
There was a case back in Newton a few years ago.
Do you mind looking at something for me? It's from a doctor who's treating one of our guests.
Look, I'm no psychiatrist, but- [Sighs]
[Exhales] But, uh-
Well.
This does appear to be a classic case of dissociative identity disorder. I knew it.
So Tad and Ben are for real.
Yeah, well, they're apparently two distinct personalities inhabiting the same bodily shell.
Tad- Ben's real name is, uh, Marlon Delaplane.
He's a janitor at a high school In Orlando.
I take it you haven't met Carlos. Who's-
There's a third personality?
Well, if Ben is the teetotaler and Tad is the hedonist, Carlos is the mediator.
I guess Delaplane developed him to referee disputes between the other personalities.
Only Carlos can decide.
Great, but how do we meet Carlos?
Well, apparently, Carlos can only be brought out...
by the presence of a beautiful woman.
Well, great. You got a minute? Yeah. Where's Danny?
He's in the corner opposite the sports book, but-
Jordan, I was- [Sighs]
You marked the bag?
It'll glow under infrared, so we can follow it.
[Man On Cellphone] Take 50,000 from the bag and put it in your pocket.
Take the bag with the rest of the million...
and slide it under the roulette table next to the Jester's Court sign and wait.
Go up the stairs.
- Hey, Doc. What's up? - Ed, good to see you.
I figured you could use a little help with this kidnapping.
Really? That's nice. So, uh, you flew all the way from Boston for this.
No. Actually, I came here to see Danny.
- Nice. - I thought that you were at the spa.
I was. How come you didn't ask me to help?
- Nobody's dead yet. - I'm helping you guys.
[Man] Target is on the second-floor overlook. [Danny] Okay. There's Gabe.
Okay. Take the money from your pocket.
- What about Millie? - Your daughter will be released in an hour.
Throw the money over the side. What?
Throw the money over the side. That's the misdirect.
[Shouting, Chattering]
[Crowd] Money! Money! Money! Money!
Keep your eyes on the bag. Forget the crowd. Forget the crowd.
Keep your eyes on the bag. [Chattering]
There's the real misdirect. Let's go.
[Chattering, Shouting]
Danny. Danny, stop them all at the door, will ya?
[Danny] Uh, make sure that you stop all these kids at the door.
Stop them all at the door.
Excuse me. Uh, what are we lookin' at?
[Woody] Four tequila shots later,
and you and I are stumbling through the casino.
Yes, I danced a little in college. I've been known to cut a rug. [Laughing]
I took a lot of, uh, modern dance. Oh, look out.
Mmm! Work it! Work it!
- [No Audible Dialogue] - That-That's the "wedding ring" guy.
That's the "wedding ring" guy. Oh, it's the "wedding ring" guy.
When my A.T.M. card works again, I'll give you your 200 back. Hey! Hey!
Give him his money back.
Bro, I was just gonna come lookin' for you. Yeah, right.
What are you doing? Save it.
Who are you? You didn't just cheat me.
[Jangling] You cheated romance.
Game over, bro. [Sighs]
[People Shouting, Cheering]
[Woody] Boy further impresses girl with incredible crime-fighting skills.
Phase 3 complete.
[Stickman] Hold your bets. Come on, five. Five!
[Stickman] Hard 10.
- That's not the only hard 10 at this table. - [Scoffs]
Woman. Ladies and gentlemen, the point is still five.
Delinda. Hi, sweetie.
You got a meeting with your dad? Lunch with Mom.
You got a second to meet with someone? Is he cute?
Uh- Mmm. Tad.
Come on, two-three. Two-three! A little Michael Jordan for me, baby!
Hey, Tad.
If you're not a drink or a supermodel,
someone's fittin' to catch a bitch slap.
Tad, I'd like you to meet Delinda.
Mucho gusto.
[Spanish Accent] I am Carlos.
Then why is he calling you Tad?
Never mind. Thank you, Delinda.
No problemo.
A security guard found this bag stuffed behind this bank of slots.
We marked it to show up with the infrared. Why didn't it?
Because there were two bags. Whoever grabbed the money put the marked bag inside another one.
The magician uses blue bags in his show. Why are they red today?
They happen to be the same color as the ones in the gift shop. Maybe they switched them.
Look how small and close together the creases are where the bag was gripped.
- What does that indicate? It's a small hand? A woman's hand? - Or maybe even smaller.
- Hmm. - Kids.
What are you doin'? We have no fingerprints for kids on file.
No, but, uh- [Sniffs]
I think there's nicotine here. The kid smokes?
Okay, I've located the bank of slots where he stashed the bag.
- Follow him. - He's goin' out the door.
[Typing]
Push in.
What, are you kiddin' me?
I'm gonna pull up footage from outside the magician's dressing room.
This might help us figure out how those kids got the red bags.
There they are being delivered.
Do we know that guy?
[Computer Beeping] No matches.
Could you go back 10 frames?
There. You see the light glint off his hair?
Human hair doesn't reflect light like that.
Whoa, whoa. That looks just like the wig that I pulled off of Labrador.
- What do you say? You think you might know him? - He looks familiar, but I'm not sure.
It's been over an hour. Maybe we should call the police again.
- How about the hair? - What? It looks like a wig.
- How do you know? - I got one just like it.
Has anyone been in your apartment, Gabe?
No, nobody. Just me and my daughter.
Sometimes her boyfriend. What's his name?
Jason. Jason Kordakis.
[Typing]
Oh, very nice. A 16-year-old kidnapper.
That's him. That's my daughter's boyfriend.
And guess who just checked into Room 4723 with a fake I.D.?
Thanks.
[Both Laughing]
[Ed, Chuckling] Oh, wow. Ice cream.
- Truant officers. - It was his idea.
[Whimpers]
Well, you gotta love a happy ending.
Count the money.
You know, when you think you got things all figured out-
It never turns out the way you figured. I know.
That doesn't mean you gotta turn around and go home. You could at least stay the night.
I don't know what I thought was gonna happen here.
Oh, maybe I had an idea, but just because something can happen-
Why don't you just come out and say it? I wanted to be ready, okay?
I really, really wanted to be ready.
I thought I was. Otherwise, I wouldn't have just jumped on that plane.
But?
But I think all I'm really ready for right now is cheap, meaningless sex.
And I wouldn't want to drop you down to my level.
Then I'd have to call you the next morning. You wouldn't have to call me.
Look, timing is everything, and you're right.
Maybe right now isn't the best time.
So this is it then? Yeah.
Have a safe flight back.
Thanks. Okay.
[Sighs]
You know, a medical examiner always reserves the right to change her mind.
[Laughs]
Could you pass me my soda?
Yeah, okay, you tricked me with the three-step plan. Hand me my damn soda.
Why do I get the feeling that you've never been tricked before, Samantha Jane?
How'd you know my whole name? I'm a cop.
Hmm. Really?
Well, answer the question, Officer.
You mean, did we or didn't we? Mm-hmm.
Oh. Look at the time. I got a plane to catch.
[Grunts] Tell me.
Come on, Samantha. You really don't remember?
Mm-mmm. I guess it must not have been that good.
[Laughing]
You wanna do it again?
Carlos. Yes.
I understand you've come to some compromise.
A compromise so airtight in its fairness...
that you will see neither Ben nor "Tod" ever again.
Ah, good, good. I was counting on that.
You must divide the money equally between the two men.
Ben's half goes to a deserving charity.
Tad's half, of course, goes to Tad.
- The bastard. - Right. Of course.
- And then they will both, you know- They'll leave immediately? - Oh, I guarantee it.
Well, then consider it done. And thank you.
Such a complex agreement will require some time to reach fruition.
And in the interim, I am going to need the accommodations...
befitting a man of my social strata... and breeding.
Again, of course.
Seven days in a suite...
with full, how do you say, R.F.B.
You want a suite for a week with... food and beverage comped?
- Yes. - Are you nuts?
"Nuts" is such a harsh colloquialism.
Don't you think? It can be.
Fine.
Okay. Now, one more thing, Senor Deline. Yes, sir.
I met the most enchanting creature at the Montecito.
Can you tell me how can I find this...
Delinda?
Delinda? Did I say Delinda? I mean Delonda.
- That's my daughter. - Oh.
Then, out of respect, I will wait until the second date.
Get out!
Okay. Open.
The master of all you survey. [Exhales]
## [Woman Singing: Ballad]
What's the matter, Danny?
Uh, I just- I guess I never thought I could ever have anything like this.
You can have whatever you want.
Mmm. ## [Continues]
Ow.