In Iran, sex outside marriage is illegal,
but half the population under 35 aren't married and the government's
worried they're not playing by the rules.
So they're doing something about it.
This is the Tebyan office - a government-run,
online Islamic dating institute.
Apparently, Iran is facing a marriage crisis, so the authorities
have decided to step in and play Cupid.
Joining me is Ali Jafari,
our official translator approved by the Ministry of Culture.
Is this the type of place, Mr Jafari, you'd come to find a wife?
Definitely, and I have plenty of reasons for it.
Apparently, this government website's set up
250 marriages this year.
The youth who come here can really take this advice and really make
a bright future instead of making the wrong choice
and end up wasting their life.
Salam.
'Waiting to say hello is Mohamadreza Soltani, the website's PR man,
'and Zohre Hosseini, the chief matchmaker.'
I quickly realised this is a dating website with a difference.
For a start, pictures are banned.
They expect parents to be
present on first dates but they say that's no barrier to success.
They introduced me to one of their clients.
The young man, who is looking for love.
Oh, really? You're the young man looking for love?
Wow, fantastic!
'It turns out Reza Tagizadeh is a success story.
'Thanks to the team here, he's engaged to be married.
'He's having free sessions with the website psychologist
'to prepare him for marriage.'
'Dr Mohammed Kamand warns him that education and family background
'matter much more than love.'
Mr Jafari translates the key message.
Loving at first look or sight is again, I emphasise, very dangerous.
I met my partner, love at first sight, I'd say it was,
and we're together ten years.
So is it really that dangerous, do you think?
I must be the minority, so!
The singles who click on the website can't choose their potential
partners. It's done for them by traditional matchmakers.
There we go.
'I want to meet them.'
Oh, wow!
It's an army of women in here!
Salam. Salam, salam.
Are you all matchmakers?
Yes. Really?
You are surprised? Yes, I'm very surprised!
'They don't just take clients from the government.
'Anyone can approach them.
'This agency is run by Malakeh Mogadam -
'Tehran's most famous matchmaker.'
So, Miss Mogadam, is everybody here working for you?
PHONE RINGS
It's not just in this room.
It's packed in the next room as well - full of matchmakers.
'They work for free.
'Matchmaking is an age-old tradition in Iran.
'It's seen as a religious good deed.'
'Miss Mogadam shows me what she calls her dowry room.'
This, essentially, is a room full of donations from very nice people to
couples who are starting off, who are starting off on married life,
who might need a sewing machine or shoes.
'The pile of presents is getting bigger
'but no-one's taking them away.'
The matchmakers get plenty of calls
but the clients are getting more demanding.
28-year-old Saba Lofti has come here with her mother, Manzar.
She's studying accountancy.
So far, she's not met men who added up to much.
The next questions are about Islamic values,
like listening to music the religious censors haven't cleared.
It's a tough question.
SHE LAUGHS
'That evening, I visit Saba at home.'
What would be the ideal husband for Saba, in your opinion?
What your mum just described - does that sound good to you?
'Saba's brother seems uncomfortable.'
'Saba has told us about one of her university classes -
'a compulsory course on marriage.
'The group is led by Ali Sabor, a professor of Islamic Education,
'also a matchmaker.'
Mr Jafari steps in.
He lived in the USA for years and has views on the situation there.
In Tehran,
more young people now live together without being married -
something that shocks Saba.
One of her fellow students says he can't get married,
even though he wants to.
In Iran, the tradition of getting parental permission
for marriage remains strong.
'So if you don't have a good job or get on with the family, you're in
'trouble, even if you're deeply in love.'
Zara? Zara.
And Zohre?
So, Ali, Zohre is your future wife-to-be, is that right?
And Zara is very evidently Zohre's identical twin.
I have to ask you, Zohre, was it love at first sight?
'Ali's 28, Zohre and Zara are 25.
'He's a film-maker, Zohre is an illustrator.
'They met at work four months ago.
'They want to get married as soon as possible,
'but first, their parents need to agree financial terms.'
There's a very beautiful and respectful dynamic
between Ali and Zohre, and even though they have chosen
not to be intimate before marriage,
it's so obvious that they're head over heels
and deeply in love with each other.
My scarf was a little bit too forward.
We're going into quite a religious ceremony, so need to cover up.
'Tonight, Zohre will meet up with Ali at the house of a family friend.
'It's the date when she and Muslims remember the death of Fatimah,
'the daughter of the Prophet Mohammed.'
THEY SING
You can really see it's such an emotional thing.
People are in tears out there and it's so interesting to see Zara,
Zohre and Ali and their dedication to their religion.
Cooking a big pot of soup where, apparently, you can make a wish
as you stir the soup.
'Zohre and Ali are also praying for their own future together.
'Their families are meeting up in three days' time and they're hoping
'they'll be given permission to marry.'
What are you wishing for?
Do you think this will work?
Zohre and Ali are following tradition
but other people their age are pushing the envelope.
Apparently, we've just walked in on a full-blown
Iranian-style photoshoot, and according to these guys,
these photos are just to upload on Instagram.
'This group of friends are studying psychology.
'They tell me they're all single but go out on group dates.'
Is this you? Yeah. Oh, wow.
Stunning. I never get that many!
This is serious dedication for social media.
I'm very, very impressed.
Before I came to Iran, I was led to believe that boys and girls were
not allowed to hang out together.
That's obviously not true.
Mr Jafari, what do you make of this conversation here?
There is so much misconceptions about Iran, and so, it should be
very interesting to observe it from close, from up close that, you know,
there is so much freedom here.
'Of course, I'd conducted this conversation carefully,
'avoiding sensitive topics like banned dating websites,
'parties with alcohol or sex before marriage.'
This is not correct? Not quite, no. All of our hair should be like this.
Oh.
The social scene here is amazingly complex
and it seems to be both subtle and quite restrictive at the same time.
And because of that, some young Iranians feel trapped.
Some are between Islamic culture and Western culture
and they're not quite sure where their identity lies.
'I'm rejoining Saba,
'who's waiting to hear news from the dating agency.'
Saba's taking me on a spot of shopping
before she gets the call from Miss Mogadam.
So, it's 3.30 and I know Miss Mogadam has promised to call,
so we shall wait and see.
I'm nervous for you, Saba.
'She tells me she's a romantic at heart.'
Do you believe in love at first sight?
PHONE RINGS
'For accountancy student Saba,
'Miss Mogadam's found a fellow accountant.'
'In an ideal world,
'she says she wouldn't use a matchmaker at all.
'The matches seem a bit predictable.'
Oh, yes!
'Saba's a conservative girl.
'She won't go on casual dates or break the rules
'but she wants romance and that's difficult.
'She didn't meet up with either of the matchmaker's men.'
We've joined Ali on the drive to Zohre's home.
Their families are meeting to negotiate the terms of the marriage,
a process known as Baleh Boran.
Do Zohre's family think you're the right match for their daughter?
We can really relate to you, Ali!
None of us have sense, either!
Do you feel like the love between you and Zohre
can survive obstacles like this?
TRANSLATION:
'Zohre's parents like Ali
'but her mum says she and her family have concerns.'
Are you all a bit nervous?
Ali's father is a cleric,
Zohre's dad is a retired teacher.
Her parents want to make sure she's provided for.
There's a number of things to discuss today.
The trickiest is a monetary guarantee
that Ali must pay to Zohre if she ever demands it.
It's paid in gold coins
and is essentially an insurance policy for wives.
It's called a Mehrieh.
Zohre and Ali try to talk alone upstairs
but they're joined by her dad.
Her parents want her to get 114 gold coins. That's £23,000.
Ali thinks it's too much and he can't afford it.
Ali offers 14 gold coins - about £3,000.
Ali's parents side with him, her parents aren't budging.
Things are getting tense and they ask us to stop filming.
That was nearly four hours of negotiations, and on two occasions,
Ali and Zohre had to leave the room.
How are you guys after that?
'The decision is now out of their hands.'
'We leave without knowing the final outcome.'
The young Iranians I've met want to marry someone they love.
They also want to obey the rules of their faith and their parents.
But it's hard to reconcile these different aims.
No wonder so many find it easier to stay single.
After we left Iran, we got a message.
They got married a week later.
Subtitles by Ericsson