d Time is such a funny thing
d You turn around and it's gone
Dirty Mary, Crazy Larry d So many things are meant to say
Dirty Mary, Crazy Larry d But the word are came out wrong
d Of all things with remerbering
d You're the best things in my mind
d I had a chance but I never had the time
d Time ~~
d Where did you run to?
d I always thought that we were friends
d Time ~~
d You know I trusted you
d You came so close but you slipped right through my hands
d News and you with something
d That just never close to my mind
d Can have the chance but I never had the time
Will the last person in Seattle please turn out the lights
Hey, Ace.
And I was wondering... What if we do the Matador instead of Chrysler,
What kind of bucks?
I thought we weren't gonna think about bucks any more.
Well, I'm not. I'm not. I'm just wondering.
Speed is expensive. how fase you wanna go?
Nice little town.
Any town is nice little town when you nail a broad.
Turned to get nervous, huh?
There she is.
Price of food's going up. You know what I mean, D?
Yeah, I know what you mean.
I figured you are.
We'll get back to the number 18 song in the chart...
Hey don't forget to stop by our KMFM broadcast news
Yours truely Hurricane Huff will be Mike Syde from 9 to noon taking your request
OK, the school barometer predicts a sunny day with highs in the mid 80s.
Hey, in your hurry to get to school, don't forget to take your lunch and your book...
We'll get right back to the number 18 song, I promise you, after a word from Sonny's Drive-In.
Hey! Asshole!
What did I tell you, Mrs. Stanton?
That if it was for you, they'd ask for the man of the house,
And if it was for me, to tell them I'd call them back.
I was washing my hair.
[phone ringing] Hello?
Yeah?
Everything under control?
Yeah. Merchandise on time?
It's been delivered and it's just waiting.
OK, Bunkie, I'll see you real soon.
All right, it's time. Call him.
I said, call him!
[ring tone] It's ringing.
[phone ringing]
Mr. Stanton, would you OK this check?
You don't have the lady's driver's license number.
Yeah, Would you like me to get that?
Oh, no, no, I've got that. You know her?
Oh, God, please answer.
Maybe you'd better dial again. The right number this time.
But I did. I did dial the right number.
[phone continues ringing] Stanton here.
George? Listen to me.
Evelyn.
There's a man here, and he wants the money.
I told you exactly what to say!
I know my husband better than you do.
Please.
George.
He says they'll kill us if you don't give him the money.
Let me talk to him.
[phone ringing] - Larry? - Yeah.
All set.
Ok.
Only, uh, there's something I think I oughta tell you.
I changed my mind.
You what?
You were right.
I mean, you take Moody Stocker.
If that 8-DL fuel cell's all it's cracked up to be,
How come Moody's still running a Firestone cell?
You son of a bitch.
Morning, Mr. Stanton.
It was supposed to be opened.
Mind if I use your phone?
It's a local call.
Lay down.
Oh, my God, no!
No!
Lady.
Lady, if I was attracted to rape, I would have waited till you finished your shower.
Now lay down and put your hands behind your back.
[phone ringing]
Whoever it is, get rid of them like I told you before.
Hello?
Uh, is the man of the house there?
Mm-hmm?
Yeah, howdy, partner.
We got a live one here who thinks maybe we're a couple of butterflies.
Yeah, he thinks a real stickup is something like a lot of hand grenades and guns or something.
You mind demonstrating that we mean what we say?
Yeah, that's right.
Oh, no! No, please.
George, you can't let him do this! Please!
No.
It's all right, Bunkie. I got it covered.
I'll see you soon.
[dial tone]
It'll be all right now, honey. It'll be all right.
Terrific.
Even brought my own bag.
Try not to squash the tomatoes.
Now, remember, we call you.
You try anything -anything- before you get that call,
And you cease to be a family man right then and there.
Hi, asshole.
What did you do with the keys?
Hey, you owe me 50 bucks.
What?
Well, listen. You gotta figure,
If you treat a decent girl like a whore, she should be paid like one, right?
If you don't give me those keys, I'm gonna pop you.
Ooh! You have something to eat.
I'm so hungry, I can't w...Oh-hoo-hoo-hoo!
Robbery's a dangerous business.
That's right, lady. Now, let's have the keys.
- I'll go. - The keys!
OK. Relax.
[turns engine] [engine starts]
Those were the keys to my grandfather's pickup.
The keys to your grandfather's pickup?
That's beautiful.
OK, Miss Mary, have it your way, but any time you want out, you just holler, hmm?
You just holler.
[truck horn honking]
Jesus Christ. what the f'ck he's doing, anyway?
Did you see that crazy son of bitch?
Average.
[coughing]
I told you if you struggled, you'll puke.
If you puke, you'll choke to death on it.
[grunts] [coughing]
- You promise you won't say anything? - Yes.
- You won't yell, you promise? - Uh-huh.
OK. I'm trusting you, now.
- Mr. Stanton? - What?
It's 10:15. I have to get the cash drawers ready.
Oh, uh... Yes, yes, in a few minutes.
Is something wrong?
No! Would you go back to your office now?
Mr. Stanton?
They... They've got Evelyn and Cindy.
What? Where?
- At home. - I'll call...
Don't.
All set?
You'd better check with the stewardess in tourist section.
Good morning. Sleep well?
What's she doing here?
I work better with an audience.
No chance.
Look, I had about as much time to argue with her then as I got with you now.
Get in.
Her share comes out of your half.
Hey, listen, who says I want anything? 'Cause I don't.
Now, how can you not like somebody as full of shit as that, huh?
Maybe he just told you to wait for his call
to give himself more time. Maybe he's already gone.
[dialing]
- Evelyn...- We told you not to call here.
We told you we'd call you. Don't try it again.
[dial tone]
Listen, whoever you are, please...
Damn you! He already hung up.
I told you not to touch that phone.
Honest, I was spouting off to a dial tone.
[dialing] Look, uh...God...
You're a neighbor, and, uh, you're calling to chat.
[phone ringing]
We told you not to call here.
We told you we'd call you. Now don't try it again.
- Oh, did I get a wrong... - [dial tone]
- That is a tape. - Are you sure?
Yes. You heard the dial tone right after click, didn't you?
Yes.
Well, it takes at least 30 seconds for my phone to disconnect after an incoming call.
I'm gonna call the police.
[dispatcher] Car 9, Car 9, a 901-T.
Collision on Highway 9 and Mount Road
Cattle truck overturned, code 2
Ambulance on way. Repeat: Ambulance on way.
Code 2.
Oh! Two-way, right?
- Yeah. - Far out.
Hey!
Did you really have Charlotte won over till your car went kaflooey?
That's what I said, ain't it?
But no more, Deke, huh?
No more stock rods, no more portin' and polishin'.
Trick heads now, mister.
We're into cubic money. We're gonna own NASCAR.
Oh, yeah, sure. I'll tell that to Sam Baker.
[mocking]I'll tell that to Sam Baker.
[dispatcher] Disturbance on the corner of 47 ..
How in the hell do you know Sam Baker?
'Cause I was his old lady.
Till I went for a ride in Lou Palmer's Learjet.
- Blue Palmer's Learjet. - That's what I said.
That's what I said.
- Wait a second. Wait a second, tone it down. - [dispatcher] All units
be on the lookout for a blue 1967 or a 1968 Chevy.
Repeat: A blue 1967 or 1968 chevy bearing two male Caucasians aged 26 to 33.
No positive identification or distinguishing features.
May be accompanied by a blond female Caucasian approximately 22 years old.
- Thes man.... - Had to pick up a flag, didn't you?
If a man was smart, do you know what he'd do right now?
What?
I don't know. I thought maybe you'd know.
Car 19, Car 19, pick up Captain Franklin at his home.
Repeat: Car 19. Pick up Captain...
Get a teletype out on this! Tell them to notify the sheriff.
You know, that bastard Franklin is gonna shit when he hears a blue '68 Chevy.
That's all I got for me to go on, is a blue '68 Chevy?
I could locate of 50 of 'em by the time it takes me to pick my nose.
All right, give me the rest of it.
Held the wife and kid hostage.
- Anybody hurt? - No, sir. No guns.
How long ago did it happen?
Well, it was 15 minutes before we even got the call.
15...Ho, ho, ho, ho. 15 minutes?
Well, they used a tape gimmick on the phone, kept the manager from calling us.
- Anything else? - Uh...
Oh, yeah. A truck got in the guy's way. So he pancaked off a dozer ramp.
Locals figure it's souped.
Souped?
That's the driver, not the car. Let's go.
[dispatcher] Car 9, Car 9, wait for ambulance...
By the way, where are we going?
South.
Hey, listen, do you always meet someone for the first time and take an instant disliking to 'em?
Mary...
stop trying to get me to make joyful noises.
Well, I'm not.
Then be glad you're here.
Oh, I'm glad. I'm glad!
Now, where are we going?
S-o-u-t-h.
Your friend's a real dazzler.
D-a-z-z-l-e-r.
K-i-s-s o-f-f.
Hey, you really want to know if I had Charlotte won?
Yeah. OK. Hang on.
[truck horns honking]
Who else do you know can do that, huh?
With or without losing an $80 windshield?
- Funny, huh? - Yeah.
- You got the $80? - Twice times.
Let's get six of them.
Investigate 8459 at warehouse..
What the hell is this? A crap table? Huh?
Sir, we've blocked off every road leading to the freeway,
And we have units coming into this area.
You just break up all them roadblocks.
You put troopers in the Ranger lookout stations.
You call in all off-duty cars.
You pair them off, you start yourself a sweep search.
A sweep search?
You got trouble hearing me?
A roadblock can't find them, and I ain't waiting for them to find it.
Don't ask me any more questions. You do it.
Yes, sir.
[dispatcher] Attention, all roadblock units.
Disperse roadblocks and begin sweep operation.
Begin sweep operation.
Car 24, cross over to secondary road, cover area eight.
Car 16 and 7...
You set up roadblocks, you're supposed to keep 'em.
And the tape was supposed to give us a 20-minute lead, only it didn't.
Yeah, yeah.
So we got off to a bad start.
Well, you know what it means when somebody like me gets off to a bad start?
Not a goddamn thing.
[bus horn honking]
Everett, what the hell are you doing, playing around with a sweep search?
Well, you know me, Carl. I'm just a country boy.
What do I know?
I just figure I gotta find 'em, stop 'em.
Well, I ain't talking philosophies. I'm talking cars
Cars that we are not going to get because the appropriations committee
will not understand you busting up roadblocks.
You've been holding those cars over my head a year now, and I'm getting tired of it.
You know, Ev, lot of times I actually enjoy your making things harder for me.
But this ain't in the same category as your refusing to wear a gun or a badge.
Oh, Carl, come on. Will you stop watching them Hollywood TV shows?
I mean, what the hell is the difference how I cut my hair
Or how I dress or if I wear a badge or a gun? Is that important?
Well, I'm not standing up in no more meetings and defending you.
Well, that's fine. Next time you get in front of that
appropriations committee, you know what you tell them?
You tell them that these suspects... they ain't gonna get away. That's for sure.
And I'm doing it for me, for my own personal reasons.
It's got nothing to do with you or you getting your new patrol cars.
Kiss my ass.
Ah, Carl.
That's not nice.
[dials] Sheriff's department, please, right away.
You keep this up, you're gonna haul in a cop.
Hey, sounds like Miss Mary's getting afraid.
Oh, no, it's not that.
It's just I'm a normal human being, and stupidity scares me.
Yeah, me too. So why don't you vacate, huh?
I second the motion.
Oh, sure, why not?
After all, I can always hitch a lift back to town, tell them you held me as hostage and, uh...
- Oh, there's bags of things... - Yeah, who you gonna tell that to, huh, Miss Mary? The cops?
Boys down at Ralston Purina? Huh?
Hey, Deke. Miss Mary ain't gonna do nothing or say nothing, except behave herself. Right?
Aah!
[horses neighing]
So help me, if you try another stunt like that again, I'm gonna braid your tits.
When you people are through impressing one another,
I'd like to get out and look at the car.
Oh, just beautiful.
Mister... we got us some problems.
- A biggie, huh? - Yeah.
Thanks.
Come on, let's get this turkey undercover.
Mount Russo lookout station reports a blue Chevy moving like a bat out of hell.
Too far for positive ID, but it sure sounds like it could be our suspects.
- Host aids Bucola PD. - Yes, sir.
But if they're going into those walnut groves, we'll lose them.
They'll go clean out of the state.
- Well, who the hell said that? - Well, you did.
Not about them, but that someday somebody was gonna be smart enough to...
Well, if I didn't say it about them, not much point in discussing it, is there?
No, sir.
- How many units you got outside? - Six.
- Well, you get 'em right quick out to Bucola Road. - Yes, sir.
"Yes, sir. Yes, sir."
Haul ass to Bucola!
Now, that was cute. That was real cute.
Move cars 9 and 12 off Route 4 over to Taylor Road.
And then you call Fish and Game, you tell them to send that helicopter over.
Yes, sir. Did you get that?
Well, come on. Come on, come on.
Headquarters to cars 9 and 12, Headquarters to cars 9 and 12.
This is a hell of a time for a pit stop.
Yeah.
Ah. Just like Europe...no toilet paper.
You hear that, Deke?
Dingleberry here knows something about Europe.
Well, I should do. I spent six months there.
Sure.
I did too. With Jamie Richardson.
With Jamie Richardson.
Hey, Deke, with Jamie Richardson, no less.
Oh, right. You don't even know who he is, dingbat.
If he ain't won Daytona twice, I don't give a shit who he is.
Well, for your information, he's the lead singer of the group Scorpion.
I can remember when he was lead singer for the group Scrap Iron.
Hey, Deke, are you gonna be a while?
Yeah.
Great.
I think I'm gonna screw Miss Mary. Do you mind, Deke?
I mind, yo-yo.
Well, you didn't mind last night.
As a matter of fact, you kept begging for more.
Oh. Well, maybe that gives you some idea of how little I was getting.
How about that, Deke?
Super-crotch here goes to the big city, and right away,
She gets glib. You know why? Because she's scared, huh?
She gets too scared, and she comes running home to Grandfather's pickup.
- And you know all it takes to scare you? - What?
Little old me.
Well, Mister, things felt a little too good for you last night, so you ran.
And I'll tell you something else.
You don't know how to say hello, and you don't know how to say goodbye.
All right, I didn't say goodbye.
I had a robbery to pull this morning, woman!
Well, all right. It's not actually the goodbyes.
What pisses me is you didn't even leave me a clean towel!
Oh, God, if it hadn't been the goodbyes,
if it hadn't been the towels, it would've been something else. You know why?
Because that's the kind of person you are. You know that?
You're the kind that's never satisfied.
You'd eat the last cookie in the jar!
And I'm telling you something...there's no more cookies in the jar, and there aren't.
But even if there was, you'd eat it!
And you'd go looking in my fridge for my pie stash!
That is totally untrue!
That is totally true.
You listen to me. You are crazy!
You are totally bananas.
Unload!
Oh, right. That is your total solution! Unload! Kiss off!
Well, you say that one more time, and I will!
Unload. Kiss off.
You mean that!
Unload! Kiss off!
Well, I goddamn will!
I won't come back! I swear to God I won't come back!
Is that a promise or a threat?
That's a promise! Well, hit it.
Goddamn you! Goodbye!
Hello.
Jeez.
Hey, Deke, come on, what are you trying to do? Establish squatter's rights?
I'm gonna need her at the wheel, and you underneath with me.
What?
I said, I'm gonna need her at the wheel and you underneath with me.
Terrific.
- Hey! - What?
You said I didn't know how to say goodbye.
Maybe I don't wanna say goodbye.
Oh, boy. I really wanna believe you...
but I'm having trouble.
Mary, I... I've busted my crank for the last five years,
Trying to win enough money to build some real speed.
I finally had to take it. I had to steal it.
You know, I can't get near Riverside or Charlotte or Daytona
unless I've got a machine, and now I...
I've got...
I need you...
to help us with the car.
Ok.
You got it.
I don't know why, but you got it.
This is Franklin. Are you the UPI reporter man?
Uh, you want a statement? OK, here it is.
Uh, quote: "I admire any man who tries to get anything he wants "any way he can as long as it's legal.
"I may be a little old-fashioned, "but I believe in law and order.
"So this poor son of a bitch better start thinking,
'cause this is my territory, and I'm gonna get him."
Uh... yeah, OK. Well, unquote it now.
And see if you get the word "son of a bitch" in print.
Shit!
Damn wire's wrapped in too tight for me to get a hold of it.
Terrific. This is what you're gonna do for me in Riverside?
Say "shit" and pull a fade?
Tell her to start moving the wheel.
Hey! Start moving the wheel!
Just a second.
Hey!
Oh! Oh, I guess I must've fallen asleep.
- You dumb broad. - Well, I was bored.
Well, pay attention.
Pay attention.
- She got bored. - Oh, great.
Turn it to the left!
Easy.
Easy!
Why didn't you say so?
- It's coming... - Yeah, work it some more!
All right, to the right now.
To the right! Are you stupid?
Larry?
Larry!
Uh...
[toilet flushing]
Ah, Captain, helicopter's not available. The governor's got it.
What's he doing with my helicopter?
Well, he's dedicating a new building at a women's college.
He'll be through in about 15 minutes. You still want it then?
What do you think I want to do, smell the seats?
- Damn right, I want it. - Yes, sir.
Hey, rover. Tuck it in.
Why?
'Cause we're stopping.
Go get something for Deke's hand?
So, what if somebody sees me?
Say hi. Tell them how you went to Europe with Jamie Richardson.
[tires screeching]
Mister, she's gonna talk.
So what?
Six or seven miles till we switch cars, and we sure as hell don't want her around then, huh?
Hey, check the map for that second turn.
Where'd you put it? Under the seat.
Have you gone crazy? It's not here.
Every bone in her crotch. That's what I'm going to break.
[honks]
- Hi. - Hi. Hand it over.
Oh, sure. Why not?
You go left on Fryman, right on James Street, then you bypass Bucola down to Jackson, and then you switch cars at Dunton Flats.
- Dunton Flats. Get in. - Then...
[siren blaring]
Car 10 to Headquarters. Car 10 to Headquarters. We got 'em.
Haul your ass! We got 'em now!
- Go on, step on it. - Step on it? I am on it!
Positive ID. A blue Chevy on Route 9.
Heading in Jackson direction. Car 10 in hot pursuit.
All right.
Pull call cars 14 and 15 to intercept at Molly River.
Have all other cars stop their sweep and move right into Jackson area.
It's about time. Get cars 14 and 15.
Headquarters to cars 14 and 15.
Proceed to Molly River and set up roadblock.
Repeat: Proceed to molly river and set up roadblock.
Sure this turkey can do what you told me it can do, Deke?
Why? Are you worried you can't out-drive them?
Hey, buddy, you watching the temperature gauge?
It don't mean a thing. She always overheats.
Come on, baby. Goddamn it, come on. Let's go!
Hold on, baby. This is a roller coaster ride. Whoo!
Keep going, you're gonna blow this engine sky high.
I ain't blowing nothin', partner.
Jesus. Man, he's really on our tail.
Whoo!
I guess that's not a rod I hear.
That's right. It ain't. It taps.
Tap...It's my ass.
Car 10 to Headquarters. Come in.
Headquarters to Car 10.
Car 10 to Headquarters. We're off the road.
Suspects are heading south on 9.
Are you hurt?
I wish I was. It would give me something to think about.
Now they're getting away.
This is Franklin. You get over to Steve's, pick up that interceptor.
I didn't think that unit was ready yet.
It's ready enough for the way you drive, and don't you wreck it.
Car 8 will be there in five minutes. The others will get there in ten.
You figured that out all by yourself?
Contact that helicopter. You tell them to meet me at Beacon's corner.
Marcus dispatch to helicopter. Marcus dispatch to helicopter.
Captain Franklin will meet you at Beacon's corner in eight minutes. Repeat: eight minutes.
I thought you said that thing was gonna be in use.
It was. We're just a hair off schedule.
Yeah. Well, we're gonna get right back on it.
[whirring]
Hey, wait a minute. Why aren't we slowing down?
She don't know me too well, does she, Deke?
Not likely she ever will. We have about one second to live.
Not too shabby.
Shabby? That wasn't even a squeeze.
No, I'll tell you what that was, mister.
That was a flash maneuver.
What the hell do you want me to do? Sit around for 15 minutes with a cop in a helicopter?
And we're not even in a second car yet?
Jeez.
Hey, Bunkie, that's the best time this turkey's ever done.
What the hell did you do to it?
Just hit it with a bigger hammer, that's all.
Where's Franklin?
He's gone to rendezvous with the helicopter, sir.
He what?
Get Franklin for me.
Headquarters calling Captain Franklin.
Headquarters to Captain Franklin. Come in.
Give me that thing.
Franklin, this is Donohue! Come in, please.
Everett, I want you to get back to Headquarters now.
Now, I know you're reading me.
Everett, aren't you taking this pursuit a little bit personal?
I sure am.
And you know something? It gets worse every time you mouth off to me.
What's that supposed to mean?
You and your empire-building.
You don't want me to catch them. You never did.
Fact is, you'd be better off if they got away. That'd cinch it.
Give you the excuse you're looking for to get all your shiny new cars.
That's all you gotin your brain, is having the biggest troop in this state.
Everett, I take it all back. I want you to catch them.
Why?
Because if you do it, you think you're gonna feel young again.
[chuckles] But all you're gonna feel is tired.
[chuckles] Hey, Carl?
What?
Kiss my ass!
You know where Fryman Road is?
Right. But I've only got 45 minutes' fuel.
Why the hell didn't you stop and fill it up?
Hey, I was given orders to hit it and get it, and I follow orders.
That's good, because I give a lot of them.
Let's go.
[honks]
[? honking "A Shave and a Haircut"]
There she is.
Hey, Deke, take the money and the radio first, huh?
Then we get the tools. Come on.
Wow. Will you look at this place?
- I'll be back in a minute. - Huh?
- I said, I'll be back in a minute. - Oh.
- She'll be back in a minute. - Good.
How much you asking for this thing?
- Three dollars even. - I'll take it.
Oh, could I see that... Oh, I'm terribly sorry.
Good God. I'm awfully sorry.
Why don't you watch what the hell you're doin'?
I guess we oughta check it out, huh?
Yeah, you're right. Uh...
- You take the left and I'll take the right, Ok? - Uh...huh.
Well, if it ain't Mary Coombs!
Hi, Mary.
Hey. Hey, guys, I, uh...
I really don't have time to talk right now.
Well, Mary's sure getting fancy, ain't she, Jake?
Would you let go of my arm?
Hey, what's the matter, Mary?
Ain't we good enough for you anymore?
Oh, choo-choo-choo.
[men laughing] Son of a bitch.
Same old technique. Phew.
[honks]
Hi.
Where the hell you been?
Look what I got ya.
[honk] [honks]
Hey, there's a blue Chevy.
Hey, I think we should go.
Well, come on, go!
[engine starts]
Must've been them. Get the license number?
No, sir. What the hell is going on around this place?
Car 20 to Headquarters.
[dispatcher] Headquarters to Captain Franklin. Chevy located at Dunton Flats.
They switched to a '69 Dodge Charger, no license yet.
Officer interviewing witnesses now.
I don't want to hear about any witnesses. Which way they headed?
Fryman Road area, south.
Car 13 oughta be there pretty quick.
You notify all the cars to make a sweep in that area.
I understand some of you have been having a tousle out here with a blond girl. Is that right?
Well, if somebody would up and talk, uh...
I might not be able to hear them pipes.
It was just little old Mary Coombs.
Did anybody see a license number?
Hey. Had a black racing stripe.
I love it, Deke. We think of everything.
Tape recorder, two-way radio, the other car.
Everything but her.
Will you get off my case?
That's another thing I love, Deke.
The way she says "I'm sorry." [chuckles] Mm!
[Larry]Well, well, well. Hi, guys.
[laughs] [siren]
This is Car 13 to Headquarters. This is Car 13 to Headquarters.
I'm in pursuit of a light-green Charger, westbound on Highway 27.
Here he comes.
We're about four miles south of Fryman Road.
Oh, shit. [honking] God...
Now, what did that billboard say?
Hey, stupid, when are you gonna do your seat belt?
There's nothing you could do that would give me any reason to.
Whoo!
Headquarters to Captain Franklin. Suspects traveling south on Highway 27.
Car 13 out of commission. Repeat: Car 13 out of commission.
You tell Donahue not to push for any new cars.
You tell him he's better off opening a junkyard.
All right. Franklin to all units, Franklin to all units.
Observe spotting procedure, call in estimated rate of speed and give partial pursuit.
Repeat: Give partial pursuit.
What's partial pursuit mean?
That means he's gonna set up roadblocks.
Franklin to units 4, 29, 37, 17, set up roadblocks at the old 99 junction.
This is Car 37 to Captain Franklin.
The fastest I can get there is about five minutes.
[Franklin] Well, now, don't panic, they won't hit there for another 15, give or take a minute.
So why don't you just start moving out, huh?
Roger. I'm on my way, sir.
Hey, where's a good place to kill some time?
How will that solve things?
Hey, Deke, Dingleberry here wants to know how that's gonna solve things.
Will you stop calling me Dingleberry? [laughs]
Hey, Stevie!
Stevie boy!
Where are ya?
Hey.
Where the hell's that car at?
She's in the garage.
But she ain't got any siren or lights yet.
Hey, look, all I care about is what you got under that hood.
All right, listen to this.
[engine roars]
So what's my top speed on this?
Unlimited.
This is Car 37 to Captain Franklin.
The road block at old 99 junction is now set up, sir.
Hey, what do you know?
A landing spot.
Hey, Bunkie, I'll spot you two balls. Oh?
All right, I'll spot you four balls.
Make it easy on yourself, my boy.
All right, I'll spot me four balls.
What'll you have, Bunkie?
I'll just have a Coke.
Beer and a Coke.
Oh, yeah. And I'll have a beer, too, please. With a shot of grenadine.
Aphrodisiac, huh?
With you around?
"No spitting, no swearing, no risque women."
Well, that just about covers your act, Mary.
Oh, it does, huh?
Well, the one in the window... that's just about where you live, too, mister.
Come on, Bunkie. I'm beginning to feel like Paul Newman.
Hey, that's $1.85.
$1.85.
I'm still waiting.
Where the hell's my report on Mary Coombs?
[dispatcher] So far, no outstanding warrants, but we're running her through the computer right now... sir.
Computer, shit.
I wouldn't try that shot, Bunkie, if I were you.
Lots of green between those balls, you know.
Not much choice.
This table's kind of screwy, too.
[whistles]
Hey, no fair! The guy's trying to make a shot!
You're not supposed to fool around!
Are you kidding? When Deke shoots pool, he's so loaded, he usually can't see the table.
Oh, hey, now, Bunkie. That ain't an excuse to go on a binge, you know.
Since when have I ever needed an excuse?
Ain't no drunk costing me another race.
You walk now, mister, and we're hanging it up for good.
I think maybe we ought to go.
Bunkie, Bunkie, I just don't want to blow it now.
Once we get to Sierra Walnut Patch, we're immune.
What is the Sierra Walnut Patch?
It's a grid of roads about 50 square miles, 60 exits.
Once we're in there, nobody can catch us or stop us.
[man over radio] This is car 37 to Captain Franklin. No sign of them yet, sir. Over.
How many minutes you got? Over.
18 minutes since your call. Over.
Maybe that clown got us wired.
Might as well gas up, huh?
Franklin to Charger. Franklin to Charger!
That's right, clown, I'm talking to you.
I know you got us monitored.
- Got us wired. - I told you he'd figure it out.
Hey, whoever's handling that car must have done some racin'.
And the way you're driving, I'd say you raced... roundy rounders.
Bumper cars... - Roundy rounders? Give me that thing.
You do that, and he'll know it's two-way. What do you think he's trying to find out?
Probably didn't race none at all. Maybe you just wished you did, huh?
- Huh? - Oh, yeah. Right on.
Give me a piece of paper.
- Hm? - Give me a piece of paper.
And a pencil.
He knows we're just waiting for him to break up that roadblock.
That's all right. Little Miss Mary's gonna do us a favor.
Why should I?
Well, because I'm asking you to.
OK. What is it?
Bucola PD to Captain Franklin.
Bucola PD to Captain Franklin. Come in, please.
Go ahead, Bucola.
Suspects apprehended, over.
Apprehended? Where?
Five miles outside Bush River. Over.
All right, I got it, Bucola. It's about time.
OK, let's gas up and get out of here.
Captain Franklin. This is Captain Franklin to Dispatch.
You notify all nearest units in the Bucola PD to move out and assist at Bush River.
Repeat, move out and assist at Bush River.
Dammit! That can't be.
That's just not fair.
This is Car 35 to Headquarters. Car 35 to Headquarters.
Car 12 and I are en route to Bucola PD.
Repeat, Car 12 and I are en route to Bucola PD.
Over and out.
Come on.
[engine starts] [siren blaring]
Hey, hold up!
[siren stops]
Car 8 to Control. Car 8 to Control.
Suspects in Charger are at large and headed west on Route 3.
We are unable to give pursuit. Repeat, unable to give pursuit.
Pursuit, crap.
All units resume sweep operations.
Return to sweep operations and this time surround the Pass.
Captain Franklin to all roadblock units.
[? funk & singing]
Cheer up, Deke.
Yes, cheer up, Deke!
Monkey, yeah, monkey! Cheer up!
All right. Get me to Walnut Grove.
[siren blaring]
What'd you slow down for?
He wants to play.
I think someone's knocking on the door.
Yeah, well, I'm gonna open it!
I hope he's a good sailor.
Give me that mic.
Clown to Franklin. Clown to Franklin!
Here we are, man.
50 square miles of nothing but road with 60 distinct and separate exits.
If you really get it on, you may be able to cover 15!
All I need to cover is one.
The one you're on.
Listen to him.
Franklin to Donohue. Franklin to Donohue.
Donohue. Go ahead.
Call in Troop B. I need all the units you can spare.
That's no good. They're monitoring us.
Now you do what I tell you.
That clown's mine, and I know it. It's just a matter of when. Now, get off that line.
They're down there someplace. Why don't they surface?
We haven't got much longer.
What do you mean?
What I've been trying to tell you ever since you got in this thing.
We haven't got any fuel left.
[screaming]
I'll kill him! I'll kill him!
You probably did.
Aw, jeez.
Let's go fix up that front end.
Hey, wait a minute. Fix up the front end?
People don't even rate a glance with you.
God, woman.
When you're racing, you don't stop and get out of the car and turn around to find out if the other guy made it through a spin all right.
Not if you want to keep on driving. Jesus.
Don't bring it on the road.
- Huh? - Just take it in.
Yeah.
Franklin to Mary Coombs. Franklin to Mary Coombs.
Mary, are you ready to go back to the joint?
'Cause that's what parole violators get.
I mean, some people shouldn't upgrade themselves, and you did.
I mean, the highest you ever got was shoplifting.
Now, I'll tell you what I'm gonna do. Mary, now, listen to me.
I'm ready and willing to make you a deal.
I've got a way maybe you save yourself, Mary.
Come in, Mary.
[switches radio off]Mary ghost?
Turns out dingleberry here is a joke after all.
- Oh, I am, am I? - Mm...hm.
Well, you know what you are?
A case of eye-and-hand coordination.
And you're not really very good at that, are you? I mean. Aah!
Don't you do that again, ever!
Well, if she has any sense about her, I won't need to.
What's the matter? You're so used to not being able to get up by yourself
You don't think anybody else can, huh?
Say it again.
Come on! Say it again!
Just fix the goddamn wheel.
Hey. Did a Dodge Charger do that?
Yeah. Or I think so.
All I saw was a yellow flash.
- Thataway? - Yeah.
Hey! Wait a minute!
Why?
I'm his mechanic.
So what? You don't have to be.
Well, I mean, you said half the money's yours, right?
You and I, we could...
Wait, I don't want you to think it's the money.
It's not that... not that at all.
And I know... you think I lie. Well, I do lie a little.
That's wrong, also. I lie all the time.
But the reason I lie...
The reason...
I know you, Miss Mary.
You do?
Wait.
Why don't you go back and work for Sam Baker? And take me with you.
I mean, you're good. Even I know that.
Why do you keep thinking being good is the whole story?
Anyway, I couldn't.
I... I drank myself right out of the entire circuit.
You don't have to be here, Miss Mary.
You really don't have to be here.
I don't have anything else to do.
You know, this whole thing's funny. I mean...
It's beginning to drift down that you don't think I'm gonna make it.
Yeah, but I always think that.
Now, let's get on with our business.
Huh?
Hank to Franklin. Hank to Franklin. I picked them up again at Bridge 69.
Coordinates: 38, Minus 3.
All right, now, you hold on to them, Hank.
Just hold on. I'll be right with you.
I'm gonna stick right up your ass this time, buddy.
Hang on. I think we've got a mover here.
I'm gonna eat your lunch, you long-haired faggot.
He's staying with you.
Yeah, you better get out. I'm gonna put you right up against a wall.
What's he got under that hood?
Driver's no slouch, either.
If he gets any closer, I'm gonna lynch him.
Well, come on, sic him!
Hey, Deke. You remember Robert Mitchum in Thunder Road?
Yeah!
I'm gonna powder his face.
You want to do a little dirt tracking, huh, hot rod?
It's gonna take more than that to cut me off, 'cause it's where I came from!
I'm gonna show you about driving this time, buddy.
Keep going, partner, 'cause my top end is unlimited.
Damn!
This is Hank to Headquarters. Hank to Headquarters. Come in, please.
[dispatcher] This is Headquarters. Go ahead, Car 10.
I almost had them.
But... I'm unable to continue hot pursuit because my brakes faded on me.
And, um...
And the steering was loose, anyway.
There. Over there. Get me over there.
Come on!
See it? That's our baby. Stay on it, now.
Franklin to Charger. You're minenow, clown.
I'm telling you, park it now and make it easy on yourself.
You're just wasting gas.
All right, it's up to you.
What is?
I want them stopped.
Stopped? How?
I don't know how. I wouldn't be asking you if I knew how to operate this machine, now, would I?
Now, you listen to me, flyboy. I want them stopped.
I don't give a good goddamn if you got to crash right into them. You hear me?
Because if you don't, you're gonna start screaming "Mayday," 'cause I'm gonna give it a try.
So, go on down there.
I said, go on down there!
Come on!
Bunky, I believe he wants us to pull over.
Let me talk to him.
Clown to Franklin. Clown to Franklin.
Come in, clown.
Get that thing out of here before I ram it straight up your ass.
This ain't no dirt track, roundy rounder.
Come on!
Watch out for that stick, mister!
He's crazy, Deke. He's crazier than I am.
I think you're right.
Let's get 'em.
Come on!
- Fuel! - Get 'em.
- We're out of fuel! - Goddamn!
Son of Bitch. Fuel! Go ahead, shut it off!
What'd I tell you?
All you gotta be is willing to take it to the max.
Franklin to Car 12. Franklin to Car 12.
Proceed on Walnut Grove Road. Coordinate: R-3.
Wait there for further instructions. What?
Get that police map out. Check on that.
Franklin to cars 7 and 15.
Use Highway 3 and proceed to coordinates T-5-6-8.
What? What's that?
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
Car 8, hold your present position. Oh.
Two up, and go left!
Those cars ain't within ten miles of where he's talking. What's he doin'?
And you go right!
You don't have the right road conditions for this kind of driving.
Ah! Hey, listen. Next corner. After that, you go right again.
Are you sure?
Of course I'm sure. I'm reading it!
Jesus.
Car 10 you go...observe spotting procedure north and east from that intersection.
Car 12, you start sweeping east from your coordinate, R-3 and Walnut.
Two up, and left again.
You bring those two freeway units west on Highway 99.
I'm closin' in on 'em.
There's only one thing it can be.
He's trying to make them out-drive themselves.
Car 7, proceed with J-4, 11-10.
Wait a minute. Did Hank say 11-10?
Yes! Where?
Well... God, I don't know!
One over, left!
Car 8, sweep west from I-4 and Highway 3.
Where? Three, up left. No, no, no. I mean right!
Make up your mind, dammit!
OK. Two up, left.
Car 18, run parallel to the main road, then left at T-1 and 5-9.
This is Car 18 to Franklin. Car 18 to Franklin. I'm nowhere near there, sir.
What do you want me to do? Over.
Now, hear this, Car 18.
When I'm talking, you shut up and you follow orders.
Cars 14 and 16, hold your position. I'm comin' right toward you.
Hey, Bunkie. He's stroking you.
He ain't gonna box me in.
You can wind it down!
Are you cracked? I'm busting out.
Busting out of what? You actually seen any of these units?
Car 15 to 10. Highway 99 and L-5, set up road block.
We made it.
We made it, Deke! [laughs] We're in the Daytona now, mister.
We're in the money, mister.
Whoo!
Hey! When we hit Frisco, I'd really like to call home.
Yeah?
Yeah.
But I'd like to call not collect.
Hey, Deke. Ask dingleberry there if she's going to spend the rest of the trip in the back seat, huh?
Hey, would you ask him to stop calling me dingleberry?
Oh, he doesn't mean anything by it. It's just another word.
You know what? I think I'm ready to unload.
Hey, mister, ain't nothing gonna stop us!
It sure looks that way!
[whistling]
[? Time ~ Is Such a Funny Thing]
d Time Where did you run to?
d I always thought that we were friends
d Time You know I trusted you
d You came so close but you slipped right through my hands