啊哈，H&K公司的 G-36突击枪 Ah, the Heckler & Koch G-36.
在合适的人手里非常致命 Quite deadly in the right hands.
啊，一号特工 Ah, Agent One.
我一直期待这一刻 I have been so looking forward to this moment.
这样啊，我尽量不让你失望 Well, in that case, I'll try not to disappoint.
你高估了你自己的力量，你比女人强不了多少，英格力先生 You overestimate your power over women, Mr English.
我得说，那实际上不可能 I'd say that would be virtually impossible.
长官？长官？ Sir?Sir?
长官，找到了吗？ Sir! Have you got them?
嗯？ 任务档案，一号特工今晚要出发 Hmm? The mission documents. Agent One's flying tonight.
是的，任务档案应该在这里 找到了 Yes, the mission documents. They're here somewhere. Ah, here we are.
一号特工 Agent One.
先生们 Gentlemen.
我是来拿档案的 I'm here for my documents.
大宝，一号特工的档案请拿给他 Bough, Agent One's documents, please.
谢谢 Thank you.
您的任务档案，一号特工 Your mission documents, Agent One.
包括潜水艇舱门的密码，我已经亲自试过了 Including the codes for the submarine hatch, which I've checked myself.
谢谢 Thank you.
那么，今夜就只到法国 So, is it just France tonight,
还是要一直穿过比利牛斯山？ or will you be slipping over the Pyrenees as well?
如果我告诉你，就不得不杀你灭口了 If I told you that, I'm afraid I'd have to kill you.
哦 Oh.
哦，好的，好的，我希望你能够 Oh, yes, yes. Well, I expect you would.
加油啊，一号特工 Cheerio, Agent One.
祝你好运，再见 Bonne chance. Arrivederci.
真经典，真与众不同 Such class. Such distinction.
所有MI7部门注意了 紧急情况
一号特工在比亚丽兹执行任务时遇害
潜水艇舱门没能打开
英国有史以来最伟大的特工转眼间就毙命了 The greatest secret agent England's ever had snuffed out in an instant.
太可怕了 Terrible.
你知道为什么全世界都嫉妒我们吗，大宝？ Do you know what makes us envied the world over, Bough?
我们总是有后备特工随时接替 绝对正确，长官 That there's always another agent waiting to step in. Absolutely, sir.
他们现在都聚集在墓地周围 And every last one of them is gathered around that grave.
在他们如此悲痛的时候，保护他们是我们莫大的荣幸 It is our honour andprivilege to guard them while they grieve.
他们的性命就掌握在我们手里了，大宝 Their lives are in our hands, Bough.
一切正常吗，英格力？ Everything in order, English?
长官，你会发现一切比正常还正常 I think you'll find it's rather more than just in order, sir.
你现在进入的是全英国最安全的地方 You're now entering the most secure location in the whole of England.
柏伽索斯，我们正面临一场国家危机 Pegasus, we face a national crisis.
很明显一号特工发现了一些线索 Agent One was clearly onto something,
我们必须找出来是什么 and we have to find out what.
我需要再派一名特工，现在还有谁？ I need another agent on this. Who else is there?
一个都没了，首相，他们在爆炸中都遇害了 No one, Prime Minister. They all died in the explosion.
全部？ All of them?
呃，幸运的是，还有一名幸存者 Well, luckily there is one who survived.
谁？ Who?
∮ 一只眼看着阴影处 ∮ ∮ One eye on the shadows ∮
∮ 保护着他的同事 ∮ ∮ Protecting his fellows ∮
∮ 从日出到月光照在他的背上 ∮ ∮ From sunup till the moon on his back ∮
∮ 送坏蛋们进地狱，让女士门动心 ∮ ∮ Sendin' villains to Hades,A hit with the ladies ∮
∮ 口袋里的种马 ∮ ∮ A stallion in the sack ∮
∮ 当右跟着左时，你不能要回你的命，杰克 ∮ ∮ You can't get your life back, when right follows left, Jack ∮
∮ 你看的越多知道的就越少 ∮ ∮ The more you see the lessyou know ∮
（王牌间谍指南）
∮ 当别人要泄露时，他的工作是秘密的. ∮ ∮ When others would leak it, His service is secret ∮
∮ 当是你的时候时，上帝也帮忙 ∮ ∮ Plays God when it'syour time to go ∮
∮ 嗨，伙计门，不要嫉妒 ∮ ∮ Hey, fellas. Don't bejealous ∮
∮ 当他们制作他时弄坏了模子 ∮ ∮ When they made him they broke the mould ∮
∮ 有自发的超凡魅力 ∮ ∮ So charismatic with an automatic ∮
∮ 从来没有太早地开火 ∮ ∮ Neverprematurely shooting his load ∮
∮ 女王和国家安全而强健 ∮ ∮ Queen and country safe and sound ∮
∮ 坏蛋们在地底下六英尺 ∮ ∮ With villains six feet underground ∮
∮ 而且没有人知道，因为没有人发现任何蛛丝马迹 ∮ ∮ And no one knows 'cause no one's found any trace ∮
∮ 一个男人的四季行踪 ∮ ∮ Of a man for all seasons ∮
∮ 爱他们，让他们在单独呆着 ∮ ∮ L oves 'em and leaves 'em alone ∮
∮ 孤胆英雄 ∮ ∮ So alone ∮
∮ 你和我都没法知道谁会干什么，为什么，什么时候，以及对谁 ∮ ∮ And you and I wouldn't have a clue who's doin' what, why, when and who ∮
∮ 在小溪里没有独木舟，要小心 ∮ ∮ Up a creek with no canoe, Watch out ∮
∮ 那个男人，四季如此 ∮ ∮ For the man for all seasons ∮
∮ 爱他们，让他们在单独呆着 ∮ ∮ L oves 'em and leaves 'em alone ∮
∮ 孤胆英雄 ∮ ∮ So alone ∮
∮ 只是在家很安全 ∮ ∮ 只是在家很安全 ∮ ∮ But safe at home ∮ ∮ But safe at home ∮
∮ 噢，是的，是的 ∮ ∮ 只是在家很安全 ∮ ∮ Oh, yeah, yeah ∮ ∮ But safe at home ∮
∮ 只是在家很安全，只是在家很安全 ∮ ∮ But safe at home, But safe at home ∮
∮ 你和我都没法知道谁会干什么，为什么，什么时候，以及对谁 ∮ ∮ Then you and I wouldn't have a clue who's doin' what, why, when and who ∮
∮ 在小溪里没有独木舟，要小心 ∮ ∮ Up a creek with no canoe, Watch out ∮
∮ 那个男人，四季如此 ∮ ∮ For the man for all seasons ∮
∮ 爱他们，让他们在单独呆着，独自呆着 ∮ ∮ L oves 'em and leaves 'em alone, so alone ∮
∮ 只是在家很安全 ∮ ∮ But safe at home ∮
（潘格斯）
是的 Right.
强尼·英格力 我是来见柏伽索斯的 Johnny English. I'm here to see Pegasus.
别着急 Still, no sense rushing things.
见面前，你还得签收一些东西 There are some items you need to sign before your briefing.
这是你新的视网膜身份识别卡 This is your new retinal I.D. card,
这是你的第九级通行证 and this is your level nine security clearance.
请签上名字和日期 Sign and date, please.
啊 Ah.
哦，让我想起了老式的耐用圆珠笔 Oh, reminds me of the old service issue ballpoint.
我记得每个特工都会带一只这样的笔 I remember every agent would carry a pen that looked just like this.
没经过训练的人一点也看不出异样，但按两下这里… Completely innocent to the untrained eye, but click it twice...
啊，英格力，你来了 Ah, English, there you are.
见到我的秘书了吗？ Have you seen my secretary?
嗯，她出去了 Um... she went out.
嗯，我们是不是该…？ Um... shall we?
一号特工相信有人阴谋盗取王室珠宝 Now, Agent One believed that there was a plot to steal the Crown Jewels.
刚刚有人赞助了几百万英镑 They've recently been through a multimillion pound restoration,
对他们进行了修复 Iargely paid for by a corporate sponsor.
今晚将在伦敦塔展示给世人 They're d ue to be unveiled toni ght at the T ower of London.
女王坚持按计划举行典礼，所以我们要你… The queen is insisting that the ceremony goes ahead, so what we want you to...
哈！ 谁… 谁… Hah! Who Who...
谁是赞助人？ Who is the sponsor, sir?
派斯卡·苏瓦吉 Pascal Sauvage.
什么，那个装模作样的拥有几间监狱的法国佬？ What, that flouncy Frenchman who owns a couple of prisons?
苏瓦吉拥有70亿英镑的帝国，英格力 Sauvage's ￡7 billion empire, English,
在60个国家开了400多间监狱 operates over 400 prisons in 60 countries.
他在这里建了25间 是的，长官 He's built 25 of them here. Right, sir.
天哪，他还和王室有关系 The man's related to the royal family, for goodness'sake.
依照首相的看法而言 As far as the prime minister's concerned,
他是英格兰最好的朋友之一 he's one of the greatest friends England's got.
现在，英格力，我要你今晚到伦敦塔，去监视揭幕仪式 Now, English, I want you at the Tower tonight, monitoring this unveiling.
保安措施上的任何缺口 Any chink in security, any weakness,
不管多细微，都必须立刻堵上 however slight, must be plugged immediately.
明白我的意思了吗？ Do we understand each other?
十分清楚，长官 很好 Perfectly, sir. Good.
哦，好的 呃，英格力… Oh, yes. And, uh, English...
再也不能出什么篓子了，特别是今晚 we can't afford any mistakes... not tonight.
我的字典里没有“篓子”这个词 The word "mistake, " sir, is not one that appears in my dictionary.
（伦敦塔）
车子很棒，先生！ Fantastic car, sir!
英格力先生，上校安东尼·切文尼克斯爵士，皇家安全主管 Mr English, Colonel Sir Anthony Chevenix, head of Royal Security.
晚上好，上校 Ah, Colonel, good evening.
按照我的要求在屋顶上布置狙击手了吗？ 布置了13个 Snipers posted on the roof as per my request? Thirteen of them.
窗子呢？ 都换成防弹不破碎的玻璃了 Windows? Refitted with bullet and shatter proof glass.
我现在要混到客人中去，不让人注意到 I shall now mingle inconspicuously with the guests.
女王陛下驾到请通知我 很好 Let me know when Her Majesty arrives. Very good.
我该和你在一起吗，长官？ Shall I mingle with you, sir?
哦，是的， 大宝 你先检查屋顶 Oh, yes, Bough. Once you've checked the roof.
救命！救命！ Help! Help!
你好 Well, hello.
你也好 Hello yourself.
强尼·英格力 Johnny English.
萝娜·坎贝尔 Lorna Campbell.
一杯血腥玛丽 ，但别太辣 A Bloody Mary, please, not too spicy.
你来这里是因为工作上的需要吗？ So, are you here in some professional capacity?
我是珠宝修复人员 I worked on the restoration of the jewels.
很有趣 你呢？ Intriguing. And yourself?
如果我告诉你，我就得杀你灭口了 If I told you that, I'm afraid I'd have to kill you.
那你试试看啊 I'd like to see you try.
苏瓦吉先生，我谨代表女王陛下 Monsieur Sauvage, on behalf of Her Majesty,
欢迎您光临 may I welcome you to the Tower.
谢谢，先生 Merci, monsieur.
你是一个人来的 英格力先生？ So, are you here alone, Mr English?
我只能选择孤身一人，坎贝尔小姐 That's how I choose to live my life, Miss Campbell.
女人需要安全，有保障，而我只能带来危险 Women want safety, security. I can offer them nothing but danger.
有些女人觉得危险很有吸引力 Some women find danger very attractive.
像你这样的女人吗，坎贝尔？ Women like you, Miss Campbell?
我这样的女人就期待你这样的男人… Women like me expect men like you...
自己找出答案 to find that out for yourself.
嗯 Hmm.
夫人 Madame.
哦，是给我的 你能帮我弄些奶酪玉米粒吗？ Oh, it's for me, actually. Could your rustle up some of those cheesy niblets?
我们说到哪儿了？ Now, where were we?
很显然，你还没见过我们的主人苏瓦吉先生 You obviously haven't met our host, Monsieur Sauvage.
不，感谢上帝 No, thank God.
我宁愿坐在仙人掌上，… You know, I think I'd rather have my bottom impaled on a giant cactus...
也不愿和那个法国暴发户说笑话 than exchange pleasantries with that jumped up Frenchman.
据我所知，法国人唯一该招待的就是入侵者 As far as I'm concerned, the only thing the French should host is an invasion.
需要帮忙吗？ Sorry, can I help?
派斯卡·苏瓦吉，法国暴发户 Pascal Sauvage, jumped up Frenchman.
萝娜·坎贝尔 我非常期待见到你 Lorna Campbell. I've been so looking forward to meeting you.
Enchante（法语幸会）
哦！ 你是强尼·英格力 久仰，久仰 But of course! You're Johnny English. I've heard all about you.
私下说说，我自己也不喜欢法国人 And between you and me, I'm not so keen on the French myself.
别告诉别人 But please don't tell them that.
我来帮你去找奶酪玉米粒 Let me go and search for your nibbly cheese bits.
不，不，不，我… 让我去吧 No, no, no. I... I insist.
法国人都是天生的侍者 The French are, after all, fantastic waiters.
世界上最好的 嗯，但 … The best in the world. Well But But...
在这儿等着，让我来招待你 不，实际上… Wait here, and I will wait on you. No, really. There's no...
不，请你！ No. Please, please, please!
这些法国人 Hmm. Les Francais.
真是非常…呃… 是不是？ Ils sont very... n'est ce pas?
女士们先生们，女士们先生们（法语） Ladies and gentlemen, mesdames est messieurs,
欢迎，欢迎光临今晚这个重要的场合 bienvenus, welcome tonight to this wonderful occasion.
我们所在的伦敦塔 As we stand here in the Tower of London,
是世界上最著名的监狱 the most famous prison in the world,
这些奇妙的珠宝 where these wonderful jewels will rest safely...
被安全得锁在这里 under lock and key,
我要感谢你们… I want to thank you...
给我这次美妙的机会… for giving me this wonderful experience...
为修复这些珠宝捐款 to contribute to the restoration of these jewels.
就像我们法国人说的，“好上加好” It was, as we say in France, le top, le best of.
多美妙的－－ And what a beautiful
是切文尼克斯上校！ 他受伤了，谁伤了他？ It's Colonel Chevenix! He's got a nasty wound, sir. Who hit him?
刺客跑到里面去了 The assailant. He ran in here.
大宝，你守住门口 Bough, you guard the door.
啊哈 Aha!
天哪，大宝，别进来，那家伙是疯子 For God's sake, Bough, don't come in. The man's a maniac!
你吓不了我 You don't frighten me!
没打到！ Missed!
我已经制服刺客了 I've managed to subdue the assailant.
恐慌过去了，一切都在控制中 The panic's over. Everything's under control.
谢谢，女士们先生们 Thank you. And now, ladies and gentlemen,
我们该镇定下来，等待女王陛下的光临… we should compose ourselves for the arrival of Her Majesty...
现在回到我们伟大国家… and return to the site of our great nation's...
无与伦比的王室珠宝这里来，它们刚刚被修复 magnificently restored Crown Jewels.
我知道，我也有这样的感觉 I know. I feel it too.
我们这个岛国的象征 The very symbols of our island nation,
离我们如此近，伸手可及… so close we could almost reach out and
女王陛下驾到，肃静 Pray silence for Her Majesty the Queen.
哦，珠宝在哪儿？ Oh, where are thejewels?
真是彻头彻尾的灾难，英格力 It's an unmitigated disaster, English.
完全同意，长官 I could n't agree more, sir.
我们得夺回珠宝，英格力，越快越好 Well, we need to get these jewels back, English, and fast.
告诉我刺客的事情 Tell me about this assailant.
在他们搜查房间时 When they searched the room,
没有找到他 there was no sign of him.
那家伙明显是个职业杀手 Well, the man was clearly a professional.
他一定是在女王来的时候溜走了 He must have escaped while the queen was being sedated.
但他是唯一的线索，我们必须找到他 But he's the only lead we've got. We have to find him.
进来，这是… 这是数据部门的罗杰 Come in. This is... This is Roger from Data Support.
请坐，他将根据你的描述画一张模拟图 Please sit down. He'll produce a likeness based on your description.
告诉我们那人长什么样？ So tell us, what did this man look like?
嗯，唔… Um... well...
他… 个头大 he was... big.
头发的颜色？ 嗯…桔色 Hair colour? Um... orange.
桔色？ 嗯，卷发 Orange? Mmm. And curly.
嗯，实际上是紧紧卷曲的的那种 Well, friZZy, actually. FriZZy sort of thing.
卷得很紧 有个眼罩 Frizzy. An eyepatch.
鼻子断了，牙齿不多 Broken nose. Very few teeth.
最多两颗 Two, I would say, at the most.
面颊上有道伤疤… And a scar on his cheek...
香蕉形状 in the shape... of a banana.
哪一边？ 两边都有 Which cheek? Both cheeks.
几乎在中间连到了一起 They sort of met in the middle.
你确信吗，英格力？ Are you sure about this, English?
哦，是的，就是这样，太像了 Oh, yes, that's him. An uncanny resemblance.
为什么，就像他就在这屋里一样 Why, it's just as if he's in the room with us.
哇，看啊，长官，全套的铃声和汽笛 Wow! Look at this, sir. Got all the bells and whistles.
别关心这些小玩意儿，把注意力放到案子上来 Never mind about the gad gets. Just focus on the case.
（请勿停车，违规者强行拖吊）
早上好，先生们，多谢等我 Good morning, gentlemen. Thank you very much for waiting.
今早我们面临的只有一个简单的问题 Now, the question that faces us this morning is a simple one.
就是，盗贼是如何进入如此高度保安的地方… Namely, how did the thieves gain access to this highly secure environment...
然后又带着珠宝逃跑的？ and then escape with thejewels afterwards?
问题很简单，我相信答案却很复杂 A simple question, but one which I believe has a complex answer.
实际上，长官… 大宝 我在思考 Actually, sir... Uh, please, Bough. My mind is at work.
你们必须知道，先生们，在一个高明的罪犯眼里… Now, what you must grasp, gentlemen, is that the master criminal...
看到的不是一间房间，而是一连串的机会 sees not a room but a series of opportunities.
我该从窗子进去吗？ Should I go in through the window?
也许 Possibly.
我该从天花板落下来吗？ 实际上，长官… Should I drop down from the ceiling? Actually, sir...
只有一件事情可以确信 There's one thing I think we can be fairly confident about,
他们不是从地板下进来的… that is that they didn't come up through the floor...
我扶住你了，长官 I've got you, sir.
没关系，朝我这边来，大宝 That's all right. Just come my way, Bough.
那我就要跨过地洞了，长官 没必要恐慌 That'll bring me right over the hole, sir. There's no need to panic.
见到底了吗，大宝？ Can you see the bottom yet, Bough?
还没有，下面越来越窄 Not yet, sir. The shaft appears to be narrowing.
我有点担心会被卡住 I'm just a little bit worried I might get stuck.
相信我，大宝 不会的，继续下 Trust me, Bough. You won't get stuck if you just keep moving.
是，长官 Yes, sir.
我没事，长官 I'm okay, sir.
到底了吗，大宝？ Are you at the bottom now, Bough?
没，我实际上被卡住了 No, I am in fact stuck now, sir.
哦，上帝，大宝 别动，我下来了 Oh, for God's sake, Bough. Stay there! I'm coming down.
我觉得这不是个好主意，长官 Uh, I'm not especially sure that's a good idea, sir.
别担心 Don't worry.
小心，长官！ Be careful, sir!
慢慢地 Gently does it.
长官？ Sir?
你没事吧，长官？ 是的，我脚下某个柔软的东西 Are you all right, sir? Yes. I landed on something quite soft.
你脚下是我，长官 哦，很好 That was me, sir. Oh, good.
现在干什么？ What now?
只能肯定的是，会不去了 There's no way back up there, that's for sure.
但这一定通向某处 But this must lead somewhere.
我在黑的地方有点不舒服，长官 I'm slightly uncomfortable in the dark, sir.
没什么可担心的，大宝 There's nothing to worry about, Bough.
也许一片漆黑 It may be pitch black,
但我们还是能看见 but we can still see.
能吗，长官？ 怎么看？ Can we, sir? How?
阿尔马格来伯山上的贝多因僧人… The Bedouin monks of the Al Maghreb mountains...
发明了一种声波圣歌 developed a system of sonic chanting.
我明白了，长官 他们的歌声… I see, sir. The sound of their chanting...
遇到障碍物会反弹 would bounce back off any obstacles,
用他们高度音准的耳朵… and using their highly tuned ears...
他们能在脑子里面形成前面道路的图像 they could paint a mental picture of the path ahead.
太棒了，长官 但，你的歌声必须保持降E调 Brilliant, sir. However, you must always sing in E flat.
∮ E音调，E音调，E音调 ∮ ∮ E flat, E flat, E flat ∮
∮ 感谢你，这音乐，也感谢我所吟唱的歌. ∮ ∮ Thank you for the music, The songs I'm singing ∮
有效吗，长官？ 很好，谢谢你，大宝 Is it working, sir? Extremely well, thank you, Bough.
∮ 感谢所有的欢乐，因为… ∮ ∮ Thanks for all the joy that... ∮
你没事吗，长官？ 我想我看见了，长官 You all right, sir? I think I can see something, sir.
哦，好啊，继续 Oh, yeah. Come on.
这是个长的 Here is the long one.
长的 It is a long one.
小心 Careful.
我知道 我们要叫支援吗，长官？ I knew it. Shall we call for backup, sir?
什么？ 看着那些胖警察来代替我们逮捕他们？ What? And watch some fat bottomed bobby make our arrest for us?
我可不这么想 I don't think so.
早上好， MI7 为您服务 Good morning, gentlemen. MI7 at your service.
看看，大宝，这些迟钝无能的家伙， Observe, Bough, the dull incompetence of the criminal mind.
他们的脑子永远达不到我们这种专家级的水准 It can never hope to match our level of technical expertise.
好了 我们现在怎么办，长官？ You've got it. What do we do now, sir?
好好学着点，大宝 Watch and learn, Bough.
他们在我们前面太远了 They're too far ahead of us.
有点信心，大宝 他们往南去了 Have faith, Bough. They're heading south.
他们在那儿，长官！ 不出所料 There they are, sir! Just as I thought.
抓好了 Hang on tight, Bough.
开这车永远赶不上他们 We're never gonna catch them in this.
你来开，大宝 我到后面去拿车 长官？ Take the wheel, Bough. I'm getting in the Aston. Sir?
换位置，大宝 我走另一边出去 Change places, Bough. I'm getting out the other side.
长官？ Sir?
停，大宝 把我调起来 Set, Bough. Take me up.
甩出去，大宝！ Swing me out, Bough!
啊 下 Whoa. Down.
上！ 上！ Up! Up!
抱歉！ Sorry!
大宝，靠边停 Bough, pull out!
那些白痴就在我们后面，再开快点！ Those idiots are right behind us. Faster!
（时速:63英哩）
啊，哈 Uh huh.
把我放在这里，大宝！ Drop me here, Bough!
哦 Ow! Oh.
不，不！ No! No! No!
哦，不，不，不，不，不 Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
他们转向公墓去了 They're turning into the Brompton Cemetery.
快赶去那儿，我先进去了 Get here as soon as you can. I'm going in.
尽管坐在轮椅上 杰弗里克服了残迹带来的种种不便… In a wheelchair. But Geoffrey overcame these terrible disabilities...
保持着乐观愉快的心情… with that simple resilience and sunny optimism...
温暖着我们每个认识他的人 that so warmed all of us who knew him,
他把余生贡献给了… spending the rest of his life in the service...
这个教区的穷人和残疾人 of the poor and disabled of this parish.
很好，真是太棒了 It's very good. Really very good.
不，不，请继续，抱歉打断 It's very entertaining. Who's that?
很有意思 他是谁？ It's very entertaining. Who's that?
你扮牧师的表演会让牢里其他犯人乐上几个小时的 That priest act of yours should keep the other prisoners entertained for hours.
哦，抱歉，我的礼貌哪里去了？强尼·英格力 Oh, I'm so sorry. Where are my manners? Johnny English,
英国秘密特工，你们都被捕了 British Secret Service, and you are all under arrest.
我得说，你的表演很棒 I must say you've done this whole thing very well.
对细节的留意很出色 The attention to detail is excellent.
你，伤心的老奶奶，很有说服力 You, the grieving granny, you're very convincing.
哦，看啊，真的眼泪 你会得到额外奖励吗？ Oh, look. Real tears. Do you get paid extra for that?
这就是我们都要的东西 Ahh, what we're all here for.
我知道！ 为什么不看看里面？ I know! Why don't we take a look inside?
哦，你们已经上了钉子了 Oh, you've nailed it down!
为什么这么做？ Why would you do that?
我知道你们会过两个星期再来把它挖出来 I know you're gonna come back in two weeks and dig it up again.
你在这个欺骗和邪恶编织的小插曲里扮演什么角色？ Now, what are you playing in this little vignette of deceit and villainy?
我是灵车司机 I'm the hearse driver.
你是灵车司机？ 是的，长官 You're the hearse driver? Yes, sir.
啊哈！ Ah!Aha!
你在这里… 贡特 There you are... Gunther.
呃，我很希望他没有惹你们讨厌 Uh, I do hope he hasn't made a nuisance of himself.
我是大宝医生… I'm Doctor, um...Bough,
精神病院的 of the Lunatic Response Unit.
恐怕贡特 要等到2028年才能被放出来 I'm afraid Gunther here wasn't supposed to be released until 2028.
是不是啊，贡特？ Isn't that right, Gunther?
是的，是的，真是非常糟糕 Yes, yes, there's been the most monumental cock up.
呃，请原谅，谨表示深深的敬意 Um, if you'll excuse me, with the deepest respect,
我无限同情 utmost sympathy.
呃，他没有向你们撒尿吧？ Uh, he hasn't urinated on anyone, has he?
不 不，没有 No. No, no.
这是葬礼祝词 把枪给我好吗？ That's a blessing. Are you gonna give me the gun, Gunther?
不是很难，是不是？ There. That wasn't too difficult, was it?
你现在回家吗？ Are you going to come home now?
哦… 面包车！我们去上面包车 Oh... in the van! Yes, we are going in the van.
好的，好的 卟咙，卟咙 Yes, yes. Vroom, vroom.
卟咙，卟咙 卟咙，卟咙 好的，好的 Vroom, vroom. Vroom, vroom. Yes. Yeah.
他在挥手道别，再见了 Yes. He's waving good bye. Good bye, everyone.
再见 再见，贡特 Good bye. Good bye, Gunther.
继续你们的葬礼 我们走 Mind the nice dead people. There we go.
走这边的路，那边，一个大台阶 Oh, we'lljust go to the path here. There. Big step.
这是墓地 人们到这里来… It's a graveyard. It's where they bring people...
好了，现在可以不装了 Yes, all right. You can stop now.
表面上，我还抓着你的胳膊 一直走 For appearances, I'll just hold your arm. Just keep walking.
跑，跑，跑！ In fact, run, run, run!
不敢相信我成功了 I can't believe I've done this.
不敢相信真的成功了！ I mean, I really cannot believe I've done this!
你们看，200 年前 You see, 200 years ago,
我的家族应该继承英格兰的王位 my family should have inherited the throne of England,
但他们被抛弃了 but they were cast aside.
再过几天 Well, in a few very short days,
他就要物归原主了 it will be back where it belongs.
（派斯卡爱德华苏瓦吉）
也就是我 With me.
我是不是该试试，是还是不是？也许？ Shall I try it on? Yes? No? Maybe?
你的加冕必须由坎特伯雷大主教主持 To make you king, we need the archbishop of Canterbury to do that.
坎特伯雷大主教 The archbishop of Canterbury...
在我们说话的时候，已经搞定了 目标锁定 is being taken care of even as we speak. TARGET ACQUIRED
（目标锁定）
（面部立体扫描完成）
还有一件事，长官 我们怎么处置英格力？ There's only one thing, sir. What are we going to do about English?
如果我是你，我就不会担心他英格力 If I were you, I wouldn't worry too much about English.
他对我们不是危险 He is no threat to us. I had his flat bugged.
很明显，这个叫英格力是个傻瓜 Clearly, the aptly named English is a fool.
他也许是傻瓜，但他总是出现 He might be a fool, but he's a fool who keeps showing up.
那么，下次他出现的时候 Well, the next time he shows up,
灭了他 eliminate him.
谢谢 Thank you.
迪特克·克来恩和克劳斯·范德塔，长官 Dieter Klein and Klaus Vendetta, sir.
6个月前刚被释放，他们一共有327项罪名 Released from prison six months ago. 327 convictions between them.
持械抢劫，严重身体伤害… Armed robbery, grievous bodily harm...
还有400张违章停车罚单… and combined parking fines of more than 400...
好的，谢谢，大宝 我想我们已经明白了 Uh, yes, all right. Thank you, Bough. I think we get the picture.
问题是，长官，范德塔和克来恩… The point is, sir, that Vendetta and Klein...
都是苏瓦吉的雇员 are both in the employ of Monsieur Sauvage.
派斯卡·苏瓦吉？ 正是，长官 Pascal Sauvage? Precisely, sir.
你意思是苏瓦吉牵扯在内？ But you're not suggesting Sauvage is involved?
我想不仅仅是牵扯的问题，长官 I think he's more than just involved, sir.
我确信他是主谋 I'm convinced he's up to his French neck in it.
别蠢了 苏瓦吉雇佣了几千员工 Don't be absurd. Sauvage employs thousands of people.
其中两个员工是恶棍，并不表示他也是恶棍 Just because two of them are villains doesn't mean that he is.
我希望立刻停止调查他 I want him discounted from this investigation immediately.
是的，长官 Yes, sir.
今晚，我要参加苏瓦吉招待新任法国大使的晚会 All right. Tonight I shall be at Sauvage's reception forthe new French ambassador.
有什么发现，可以到那里找我 Any developments, you can reach me there.
除了这以外，我不希望你靠近他方圆100英里以内 Apart from that, I don't want you within a hundred miles of the man.
一定，长官 Absolutely, sir.
征用命令… 立刻向MI7军需官要求供应 Requisition order.. MI7 quartermasters for immediate supply.,
一架军用运输机，加满燃料 one military transport plane, fully fueled,
还要夜间城市上空飞行的许可证 with permission for nighttime city over flight;
两个夜间伪装降落伞，加上储备 two night camouflage parachutes, plus reserves,
还有橡胶紧身衣两件，黑色的 plus neoprene bodysuits, twice, in black.
我不喜欢海军兰的 I've never liked the navy blue.
一件40英寸的防弹衣，因为我要那种袖长 And a 40 inch chest for me 'cause I need the sleeve length.
早上好，菲尔齐 早上好 Morning, Felch. Morning.
哦，两个特种部队的印章指环 Oh, and two Special Forces signet rings,
有底色的而且使用色标的 primed and colour coded.
这些干什么用的？ 今晚的行动用 What's all this for? For tonight's operation.
我们要打入苏瓦吉的总部 We're going to break into Sauvage's headquarters.
但柏伽索斯说… 我来对付柏伽索斯 But Pegasus said... Let me worry about Pegasus.
我知道苏瓦吉是幕后的黑手 I know that Sauvage is behind all this,
今晚我们就是要拿证据 and tonight we're going to get the evidence.
有什么问题吗，长官？ 刚才那声音是菲尔齐的吗？ Is something wrong, sir? Did that sound like Felch to you?
大宝… Bough
你到楼上去 You, upstairs.
哦 Ow.
能看见他吗，大宝？ He's on the upper level, sir.
他在上面一层，长官 He's on the upper level, sir.
他跑不了了 Got him.
像盘曲的毒蛇… 出击 And like a coiled viper... he strikes.
你怎么认为，长官，一定有两个人？ So what you're saying, sir, is there must have been two of them?
起码两个，大宝 也许4个 Oh, at least, Bough. Possibly four.
真奇怪，我怎么没看见 I wonder why I didn't see them.
你不该停留在你的失误上 You mustn't dwell on your mistakes.
你必须从中吸取教训，向前进 是的，长官 You must learn from them, then move on. Yes, sir.
你当时在哪里，长官？ 别谈这个了，大宝！ So where were you, sir? Just drop it, Bough!
啊！ 那是什么，长官？ 那摩托 Aah! What is it, sir? That bike.
你把今晚要的东西准备好 You get things sorted out for tonight.
啊，我们又见面了 Well, well, we meet again.
英格力先生 真是个惊喜 Mr English. What a pleasant surprise.
我正想你什么时候出现呢 I wondered when you might show up again.
正相反，坎贝尔小姐 不是我，是你不停出现 On the contrary, Miss Campbell. It is not I who keeps showing up. It's you.
你喜欢寿司吗？ Do you like sushi?
恩？ Hmm?
哦，寿司，我几乎以此为生 Oh, sushi! I practically live off the stuff.
你可以说东方的神秘事物对我一点都不神秘 You might say the mysteries of the Orient are no mystery to me.
清酒？ 啊，清酒 Sake? Ah. Sake.
干杯 Cheers.
祝你女儿都长三个屁股 May all your daughters be born with three bottoms.
现在，也许你可以解释一下… Now then, perhaps you can explain how it is...
为什么两次在犯罪现场都遇到你… that I run into you at two crime scenes...
而且在任何一个政府的计算机上都找不到你的记录 and then can't find any record of you on a single government computer.
你为什么不去问政府？ Shouldn't you ask the government that?
我就是政府的人，我在问你 I am the government and I'm asking you.
我来帮你 Let me.
恩，你很勇敢 Mmm. You're brave.
他们说海胆是终结美味 They say that sea urchin's the ultimate acquired taste.
嗯，那是我的个人最爱 Hmm. It's a personal favourite of mine.
我想人们因为它从肛门进食所以觉得它恶心 I think people are put off by how it feeds through its bottom.
失陪一下 Would you excuse me for a moment?
抱歉，我是MI7部门的 抱歉，我是秘密特工 Excuse me. Sorry. I'm from MI7. Sorry. I'm a secret agent.
一切就绪了，大宝？ 快了，长官 Everything set, Bough? Just about, sir.
长官，你介意我再温习一下计划吗？ Actually, sir, do you mind if I run through the plan one more time?
不，不 那里有两栋建筑 No, no. These are the two buildings here.
这就是我们的目标，苏瓦吉的总部，在市医院旁边 This one is ourtarget, Sauvage's headquarters, next to City Hospital.
我先跳，降落在屋顶的南边 I jump first and land on the south side of the roof,
用绳子降落14层楼，从这个窗子进去 abseil down 14 floors and cut through this window here.
我降落在东边，用绳子降12层楼 I then land on the east side and abseil down 12 floors.
你就在那儿等我排除警报系统以后给你信号 Where you wait for my signal that I've disabled the alarm system.
是的 你从这个窗子进去 Yes. You them break i nto this window here,
沿着安全走廊走，进入苏瓦吉的办公室 work your way along the secure corridor and penetrate Sauvage's office.
是的，是的 那样能行吗，长官？ Yes, yes. Is that okay, sir?
从我想到这个主意起就没有问题，大宝 It's been okay ever since I thought up the idea, Bough.
哦，我差点忘记了，长官 你的激光信号器 Oh, I nearly forgot, sir. Your laser beacon.
什么？ 你的激光信号器！ My what? Your laser beacon!
它可以引导你降落到苏瓦吉屋子 It'll guide you onto Sauvage's building.
你对硬件的依赖让我好笑，大宝 Your dependence on hardware really does amuse me, Bough.
我曾经降落在格拉哈里沙漠… I've been dropped into the Kalahari Desert...
什么也没有带，除了一把牙刷和一包柠檬果子露 carrying nothing more than a toothbrush and a packet of sherbet lemons,
但我仍然在斋月前到达了布拉瓦约 and I still found my way to Bulawayo before Ramadan.
所以，谢谢你，大宝，但也没什么好谢的 So thank you, Bough, but no thank you.
大宝，走！ Bough, go!
杰利连摩！ Geronimo!
方丹果！ Fandango!
啊！ Ai yi yi.
好了 Right.
警报解除，长官 Alarm's disabled, sir.
收到，大宝 Roger that, Bough.
（实验室）
（脑神经科）
比我想的要糟，大宝 This is worse than I thought, Bough.
苏瓦吉在这里搞了格实验室 Sauvage has got some kind of laboratory set up here.
鬼知道他们在这里干什么 God knows what kind of sick operation he's running.
上帝，他们把你怎么了？ My God, what have they done to you?
取了点血 They've taken some of my blood.
杂种！ 这是为了做试验 Bastards! It's only for tests.
当然是，跟我来，朋友 Of course it is. Come on, my friend.
在他们取掉你身上其他东西前逃出去 Let's get you out of here before they take anything else.
晚上好，弗兰肯斯坦博士（形容一位科学家在合成人兽合成体） Good evening, Dr Frankenstein.
请这边走 Come on This way, please.
来啊，夜还长着呢 Come on. I haven't got all night.
还有你们，死亡天使 And you, you angels of death.
转身，走 About turn. Come on, let's go.
快点，快点，继续走 Come on, come on. Keep moving.
到那边去，我知道你们在这里干什么 还有你 Come on. Over there. I know what you're doing here. And you.
快点，快啊，到那边去 Come on. Quicker. Quicker. Over there.
现在 Now then,
也许你也要带我去见你们的魔鬼老板 perhaps you could direct me to your evil paymaster.
你在说什么？ What are you talking about?
你知道得很清楚我说什么 You know exactly what I'm talking about.
派斯卡·苏瓦吉的办公室在哪儿？ Where is the office of Pascal Sauvage?
你马上就到了吗，长官？ Are you coming over here in a minute, sir?
我是MI7的 I'm from MI7.
这是在测试你们的紧急发应系统 This has been a test of your emergency response systems,
我得说，你们干得很好 and I have to say you've all done extremely well.
好吧，那就丢给你们自己管了 Right. Well, I'll leave you to it.
啊，早日康复 And, uh, get well soon.
哦，上帝！ Oh, God!
长官 长官 Sir. Sir.
你降错地方了？ Did you just land on the wrong building?
我对附近的环境做了一个预防性的检查 I did a precautionary sweep of the immediate environment.
是的 Right.
一切顺利 很好 And everything was fine. Good.
好的，我们走 Okay, let's go.
我到楼下的招待会去… I will be downstairs at the reception
你们走得太远了 晚上好 That's far enough. Well, good evening.
也许你也喜欢这个 是什么？ Perhaps you'd like this as well. What is it?
我来给你看 啊！ Let me show you. Aah!
很有效，大宝，但完全多余 Well executed, Bough, but completely redundant.
什么意思，先生？ 超级力量的肌肉松弛剂 How do you mean, sir? Super strength muscle relaxant.
即便他醒来也是手无缚鸡之力 When he wakes up, he'll be as floppy as a damp old sock.
是什么？ What's this?
那是坎特伯雷大主教的脸 That's the face of the archbishop of Canterbury.
他们在干什么？ What are they doing?
这跟王室珠宝有何关联？ What's this got to do with the Crown Jewels?
（天国已近，赶快加油）
大宝 Bough.
英格力 English.
有一个人，他的帝国曾… A people whose empire once covered...
覆盖地球的四分之一面积 one quarter of the surface of the earth.
可以，已不再是了 Alas, no longer.
我的朋友们问我，"派斯卡，你怎么对追溯… My friends ask me, "Pascal, how can you be so interested...
过去的小王国那么有兴趣？" in such a backward, grotty little country?"
我的回答很简单… 女王 My answer is simple.. the queen.
我们的女王比全世界上… The queen has more power in hertiny white gloves...
任何一个国家的元首都富有权利 than any other head of state in the entire world.
她可以宣战或选择和平， She can declare war or make peace,
最具魅力的是… and most intriguingly...
她只要愿意就能将她的土地拆分 she can seiZe any piece of land which takes her fancy.
当然了，女王从不用… Ofcourse, the queen never uses...
这巨大的力量来自己获利 the enormous power afforded to her.
但设想下有人用了那力量 But imagine someone who would use that power.
设想一下，说，我 Imagine, say, me.
他怎么做到的，先生？他怎么弄得自己像个国王？ But how could he do that, sir? How could he make himself king?
大主教 The archbishop.
哦 Ow.
举起手来 那样很好 Hands up. There's a good fellow.
于夜晚重装身处办公室 Heavily armed for a late night at the office.
你个笨蛋，英格力 你绝对无法活着离开这儿 You fool, English. You'll never get out of the building alive.
你省省口舌，还是回答我的问题吧 I'd save your breath for my questioning.
我不会跟是说任何事情 I'm not telling you anything.
不对 Incorrect.
钠喷妥撒 Sodium pentothal.
我不骗你 这可是会让人讲真话的麻药 I won't lie to you. It's a truth serum.
那么，为什么苏瓦吉想要加冕他自己？ Now then, why does Sauvage want to have himself crowned?
对于这儿的进程你一无所知，对吗？ You have no idea what's going on here, do you?
如果那不是那么的"pablibblit"，那定会蛮有趣的 It would be funny if it wasn't so "pablibblit."
什么？ What?
他开始胡言乱语了，先生 我听到了 He's talking gibberish, sir. I can hear that.
他倒在我身上了，先生 我看到了 He's collapsed onto me, sir. I can see that.
你确定你没有把注射管子搞错？ 什么？ You don't think you could've got the syringes mixed up? What?
给外头的门卫注射能说真话的麻药，给克来恩注射松弛剂？ Given the guard outside truth serum and given Klein the muscle relaxant?
啊！ Aah!
别开玩笑了，大宝 我想我左右手还是会分的 Don't be ridiculous, Bough. I think I know my right from my left.
长官？ 哦，他妈的 Sir? Oh, bugger it.
大宝，去拿"flodd" Bough, take "flodd."
拿什么啊，长官？ "Flodd" "Schlage" Take what, sir? Flodd. "Schlage."
我没听清第二个词是什么，长官 "Schlaaaagh！" I'm not quite getting that second word, sir. Schlaaaagh!
写下来，长官 "Schlaaaagh！" Write it down, sir. Schlaaaagh!
没错！ Yes!
"C" C A… 啊… C. C A Uh...
车子！坐车！我们是做飞机来的 Car! Take the car! We came by plane.
走开！ Bugger off!
在那儿别动 Hold it right there.
他们怎么啦？ 我不会跟你们说的 What's wrong with them? I'm not telling you.
错误回答 Wrong answer.
你们俩在搞什么？ What is it with you two?
啊？ Huh?
我们快离开这儿 Let's get outta here.
不好意思，但你是谁呢？ Sorry, but who are you, exactly?
特工坎贝尔 我隶属于巴黎的国际刑警组织 Special Agent Campbell. I'm attached to Interpol in Paris.
我们监视苏瓦吉好几个月了 We've been watching Sauvage for months.
为什么？ Why?
因为大多数在这六个月内从苏瓦吉的监狱里… Because every major convict released from a Sauvage prison in six months...
释放的犯人已被其的一间公司雇用 has been employed by one of his companies.
我们认为他重新召集那帮人是为了个重大的犯罪事件 We believe he's recruiting them for a major criminal conspiracy.
我们就只是不明白要干什么 We just don't know what yet.
他说什么？ 柏伽索斯！ What did he say? Pegasus!
我们必须向柏伽索斯报告！ We have to report to Pegasus!
哦，不，先生 不，不，不 Oh, no, sir. No, no, no.
我们怎么从这儿出去？ 嘿，你们两个！ How do we get out of here? Hey, you two!
你对我所做的真的有伤害 How do we get out of here? Hey, you two!
是的 不好意思，我们如何才能不被发现的离开这儿？ Yeah. Sorry about that. How do we get out of here without being seen?
好的 Okay.
沿着喷泉的左侧走 Left by the fountain,
再顺着防火出口右边走 right by the fire exit,
一直走到电梯尽头 to the elevator at the end.
谢谢 哦，我的天哪 Thank you. Oh, my God.
干得好，大宝 Nice job, Bough.
左边，长官，左边！ Left, sir. Left!
长官，你不能就这样去苏瓦吉的招待会 Sir, you can't go to Sauvage's reception in this state.
药物的作用即将用尽 The effect of the drug has practically worn off.
我很好… I'm "fline"
真的很好… 啊，非常好… schline... uh, "gline"...
先生 谢谢 Monsieur. Ah. Thank you.
再来一杯吗？ 好的 Would you like another? Please.
谢谢 Thank you.
你搞什么啊… What in God's name...
啊，外交大臣 Ah, Foreign "Sebretarary."
嗯… Um
啊！ Aah!
我们跳舞吧？ hall we dance?
打搅了，先生 很抱歉打扰了您… Excuse me, sir. I'm very sorry to interrupt...
派斯卡，见到你真是太高兴了 Pascal, how nice to see you again.
玩得开心吗？ 哦，开心得不得了 Enjoying the party? Oh, splendid affair.
我是来通知你，你的人英格力… I was until I was informed that your man English...
和他那古怪的朋友一整夜的功夫… and his curious boyfriend here have spent the evening...
闯进我的办公室，打伤我的人 breaking into my office and assaulting my staff.
这是真的吗，大宝？ 嗯，我们… Is this true, Bough? Well, we we...
你认为你做了些什么？ What do you think you're up to?
长官，如果我能提供… 回家去，大宝！ Sir, if I could just offe Go home, Bough!
现在！ Now!
我早就命令过你不要惊动苏瓦吉 I gave you direct orders not to meddle with Sauvage.
那你干了些什么？ What do you do?
闯进他的办公室 Break into his office
打伤他的两个手下 and assault two of his staff.
然后你来到了这儿 Then you march in here,
不知道哪根筋不对 loaded with God knows what,
冒犯了外交大臣 and insult the foreign secretary.
30年里我在政府里从没见过如此的举动 I haven't encountered such behaviour in Whitehall in 30 years.
但是… 没有但是，英格力 But There are no "buts, " English.
你不用再跟这案子了 你的安全通行就此终结 You're off the case. Your security clearance is hereby cancelled.
3个月的休假之后，你将返回原级 After a three month leave of absence, you will return at your old grade.
我希望再也见不到你 And I hope never to hear your name again.
英格力知道得太多了 English has seen too much.
执行B计划 We go to plan "B."
揭穿这假的大主教… Get rid of the fake archbishop...
绿灯访问女王陛下 and green light the visit to Her Majesty.
然后这可怜的国家将会因官方上给我加冕… Then this pathetic country can humiliate itself...
而自我羞辱 by crowning me officially.
（女王在桑德灵厄姆的住处）
这是封让位证明… That's a letter of abdication...
关于断绝你与王位关系… renouncing your claims to the throne...
以及你整个家族关系的证明 and the claims of your entire family.
签字 Sign it.
（逊位书）
决不 Never.
喂？ Yes?
总理先生，抱歉那么晚打电话给你 Prime Minister, sorry to call so late,
但我担心女王就要让位了 but I'm afraid the queen is abdicating.
什么？ What?
让位？但那是不可能的 Abdicated? But that's not possible.
我只希望那是真的 I only wish that were true.
让我跟她说 也许她只是… 派斯卡，她已经走了 Let me talk to her. Maybe she just... Pascal, she's gone.
我的人已经花了10个小时… My people have spent the last 10 hours...
来确认王位的合法继承人… trying to track down the rightful heir to the throne...
他们提出个人的名字，这是他们双手赞同的 and they've come up with a name, which they've double checked.
是谁？ Who is it?
是你 不 It's you. No!
清晨王室珠宝返还到… In the wake of the return of the Crown Jewels...
伦敦北部的一警察局 to a police station in North London,
派斯卡·苏瓦吉的加冕仪式… Pascal Sauvage has requested that his coronation...
将于本周四举行 take place this Thursday.
在议院，总理说他期盼着这场盛典… In the House, the prime minister said he was looking forward to the ceremony...
他相信苏瓦吉绅士将会是个好国王… and he believed that Monsieur Sauvage will make a fine king...
他会给我们旧有的制度带来最好的现代欧洲的制度 and will bring all that is best about modern Europe to our ancient institutions.
带上你的车钥匙我们有活要干了 Get your car keys. We've got work to do.
坎贝尔小姐 苏瓦吉正以首脑的姿态回法国去 Miss Campbell. Sauvage is heading back to France.
他邀请了世界上最富有的13个犯罪策划到那儿见他 He's invited 13 of the richest criminal masterminds in the world to meet him there.
对不起，坎贝尔小姐 我不再跟这个案子了 I'm sorry, Miss Campbell. I'm off the case.
案子被重新分配了 It's been reassigned.
我知道 重新分配给了我 I know. Reassigned to me.
我想要你跟我一块儿 就让我一个人待着吧 I want you with me. Just leave me alone.
你是愿意坐在这令人不爽的公寓里自怨自艾呢？ Are you gonna sit here in this grotty flat feeling sorry foryourself?
还是愿意出去拯救你的国家呢？ Or are you gonna get out there and save your country?
我要待在这公寓里 I'm gonna sit in the flat.
强尼，这太可笑了 我是个废人 Johnny, this is ridiculous. I'm a spent force.
废啊，笨蛋 Spent, my ass.
哦 Ow.
请…你… 住…手？ Will... you... please... stop?
我要迟一会儿 I'll just be a minute.
（新王派斯卡苏瓦吉登基典礼）
（法国北部）
一个小时候就是黄昏 接着我们就能朝城堡进发了 It'll be nightfall in an hour. Then we can strike out for the chateau.
可问题是，那一时刻苏瓦吉把王冠戴在头上 The fact is, the moment Sauvage gets that crown on his head,
他就能对我所爱的国家为所欲为了 he'll be able to do whatever he likes with the country that I love,
那就是为何你我要来阻止他的原因 and that is why you and I have got to stop him.
考虑那个想法？ 差不多 Relishing the thought? Something like that.
我猜你跟很多女人做过爱，不是吗，强尼？ I suppose you've made love to lots of women, haven't you, Johnny?
啊，嗯，你知道啦， Uh Uh, well, you know,
某人未必尽其全力 one does one's best.
就只是… It's just...
嗯，我未婚夫离开我已经三年了 Well, it's been three years since my fiance left me,
从那之后我就没跟任何人做过爱 and since then I haven't made love to anyone.
但我遇到你后… But then I met you...
我感觉到了… 这种冲动… and I felt this... hunger...
在蠢蠢欲动 deep down inside.
我想要跟你说些事情，我想跟你做些什么事… I wanted to say things to you, I wanted to do things to you...
那种事我已经很久很久没想要做过了 that I haven't wanted to do in a very, very, very long time.
啊… What, uh...
我们在谈些什么事情啊？ What sort of things are we talking about?
关于在你脸上拍击的事 Things like punching you in the face,
关于在你后面华而不实的偷袭你的事 kicking you in the backside for being such a pompous, know nothing asshole.
但然后我开始看到脱俗的事物 But then I started to see beyond the idiot that everybody else saw.
我开始看到里面有个人… I started to see the man on the inside...
他坚守他的职责 who was determined to do his duty,
无论遇到什么困难 no matter what or who lay in his way.
接着我开始感觉到了些其它的东西 And I began to feel other things for him,
我想为他做些其它的事 to want to do other things for him.
事情… Things...
包括塑胶玩具和软干酪？ involving plastic toys and soft cheese?
什么？ 什么？什么？ What? What? What?
你在戏耍我 你正在叫我不要这么温柔的对你 You're toying with me. You're telling me to stop in the gentlest way you know how.
不是的… No. N N No...
你是个特殊的人… You're such a special person...
当我易受攻击时不利用我 not to take advantage of me while I'm vulnerable.
不，可是… 谢谢你… N No... Well So thank you...
是如此的有绅士风度 for being such a gentleman.
那没什么 Not at all.
我知道你在想什么，坎贝尔小姐 I know what you're thinking, Miss Campbell.
如果我们不阻止这一切，天知道英国会发生什么 If we don't pull this off, God knows what might happen to England.
实际上，我在想那肯定有比那管子更好的途径 Actually, I was thinking there must be a betterway in than that pipe.
可是没有 Well, there isn't.
我已经从各个方面分析过了，这是最好的选择 I've analysed it from every angle, and this is the best option.
我先上，如果路线很明确，我就联络你 I'll go in first, and if it's a clear way through, I'll call down.
强尼 Johnny.
小心点 我一直很小心 Be careful. I'm always careful.
哦 Ohh.
先生们 Gentlemen.
再过几小时时间… In a few hours time...
我将成为下任英国国王 I will become the next king of England.
哦，不 Oh, no.
你怎么进来这儿的？ 爬梯子 How did you get here? Up the ladder.
这没什么，就是有一点臭罢了 Pull yourself together. It's only a bit of poo.
哦！好冷啊！好冷啊！ Oh! Oh, it's cold! It's cold!
世上从没见过用尽的… What is the one commodity...
货品是什么？ the world never seems to run out of?
是罪犯，先生们 Criminals, gentlemen.
犯法着 Lawbreakers.
世界上每个国家为解决这个问题… Every nation in the world struggles...
而建造监狱 with the issue of overcrowded prisons.
那么，我们与所有这些坏人做什么呢？ So, what do we do with all these villains?
找到解决那个问题的方法… Find the solution to that problem...
世界上的政府们将会永远酬谢你们 and the governments of the world would pay you through their nose.
很幸运，我找到了个解决的办法 Fortunately, I have found a solution.
我们清空这个星球上所有的监狱 We empty every prison on the entire planet,
我们把这群人类的渣滓… we take the resulting tidal wave of human scum...
汇总到这儿来 and we put it here.
此刻我加冕为国王 The moment I am crowned king,
我将把英国变成世界历史上… I will turn England into the largest prison...
最大的监狱 in the history of the world.
21万平方英里… 210, 000 square miles...
作为最初的地产… of prime real estate...
方便的从人类真实文明中分开… conveniently separated from true civilization...
用20英里的海洋… by 20 miles of ocean...
不久全世界就有可能… 走吧 and soon to be available... Come on.
把他们的犯人关到这里来 for the entire world to dump its human waste in.
根据潮流的设计， According to current projections,
我们可以使用该监狱至少500年 we will not run out of prison space for the next 500 years.
所以今晚，你们当中将仅有一个人… So, toni ght one, and only one, of you...
可以赢得49%的机会… So, tonight one, and only one, of you...
离开这儿 of this venture.
所以那就是他的小把戏 我们必须得到那DVD So that's his little game. We must get hold of that DVD.
但怎么做呢，强尼？我们就只有两个人 But how, Johnny? There's only two of us.
你还年轻，坎贝尔小姐，而且没有经验 You're young, Miss Campbell, and inexperienced.
你看起来忘记了… What you seem to have forgotten is that...
没人知道我们在这儿 nobody knows we are here.
我们该作出至关重要的决定 At our disposal we have the vital element of surprise.
现今，我的计划简单但有效 Now, my plan is simple but effective.
我将在房间尽头的走廊降落 I shall drop from the gallery at this end of the room
然后逮住苏瓦吉 and take Sauvage prisoner.
你接着从远门端进来 You will then enter from the far door,
切断任何逃跑路线 cutting off any means of escape.
然后，将苏瓦吉作为人质 Then, using Sauvage as a hostage,
我们就能离开这鬼地方 明白了吗？ we'll get the hell out of here. Clear?
举起手来，你个法国男妓 Get 'em up, you French ponce.
不过，英格力先生，我真得很吃惊！ But, Mr English, I'm gobsmacked!
真是意想不到的吃惊！ What an unexpected surprise.
惊奇非常是我的专业，苏瓦吉 Surprises are very much my speciality, Sauvage.
我想这我们已经看够了 I think we've seen enough of this.
我很清楚地明白你们的计划，我来这就是为了阻止它 I know exactly what you're planning, and I'm here to put a stop to it.
我的屁股也会在你之前成为英国国王的 My bottom will be king of England before you are.
又错了 Wrong again.
或许你介意看看你身后 Perhaps you'd care to look behind you.
哦，请了 Oh, please.
萝娜！ Lorna!
对不起，强尼 I'm sorry, Johnny.
好吧，我很遗憾今晚我们不得不… Well, I'm afraid that we'll have to...
结束夜总会的节目表演了 conclude the floor show for tonight.
没那么容易，苏瓦吉 Not so fast, Sauvage.
你可以抓住我，但你永远控制不了英国 You may have taken me, but you'll never take England.
不只是我还能呼吸… Not as long as I have breath in my body...
还有我枪中有子弹 or a bullet in my gun.
你知道吗，英格力先生，我真的会想你的 You know, Mr English, I'm going to miss you. Really.
你真得很搞笑，我谢谢你 You're very entertaining. I thank you.
带他们走 Take them away.
大家早上好啊 Good morning, everybody,
欢迎收听早餐秀 and welcome to the breakfast show.
人群在这儿集结就是为了我们首位法国国王的加冕… As the crowds are gathering here for the crowning of our first French king...
自从1066年以来 since the year 1066,
这是伦敦调频，我们将通过热线电话述说我们最爱法国的10件事 call here at London FM with the top ten things you most love about the French.
我们目前还没接到任何热线 We haven 't had any calls yet, uh, at all,
但线路依然开通着，我将再播报一次热线号码… but the lines are still open and I'll give you that number again...
０－２－０－７… Zero, deux, Zero, sept...
这不对，强尼 This is not good, Johnny.
我们该好好想想 We've got to think of something.
等等，我有主意了 Wait a minute. I've got an idea.
跳！ 跳！ Hop! Hop!
再跳！ 再跳！停！ And hop! And hop! And stop!
现在，你对危地马拉三角洲的… Now, are you familiar...
萨满教道士用喉咙发颤音熟悉吗？ with the shaman throat warblers of the Guatemalan delta?
什么？ What?
他们很久以来信奉… It has long been their belief...
口哨的发音频率会引起金属锁的共鸣… that a whistle pitched at the precise resonant frequency of a metal lock...
共鸣所产生的震动将会使门很轻松的打开 will vibrate the levers in such a way that the door will simply swing open.
难以置信 Unbelievable.
跪下 And kneel.
好的 开始了 Right. Here goes.
我听不到任何声音了 我在发出超声波 I can't hear anything. I'm into ultrasonic.
强尼，你能不那么干而面对现实吗？ Will you just stop all this and face facts?
我们失败了 能救我们的唯一希望就是奇迹 We've failed. The only thing that can save us now is a miracle.
有效果了！ It worked!
哦！ 长官？ Ohh! Sir?
我不知道你为什么要从那该死的排粪管进来，大宝 I don't know why you hauled yourself up that dreadful poo tube, Bough,
在那旁边有个很棒的梯子 when there was a perfectly good ladder right beside it.
现在，苏瓦吉可能已经愚弄了这个国家… Now, Sauvage may have fooled the country...
靠他的假大主教，和他的秘密议程， with his fake archbishop and his secret agenda,
但他没法愚弄我 but he hasn't fooled me.
那么，计划是这样的 So, here's the plan.
∮ 让所有善良的人民来欢庆 ∮ ∮ Let all good people rejoice ∮
∮ 欢庆 ∮ ∮ Rejoice ∮
∮ 让所有善良的人民来欢庆 ∮ ∮ Let all good people rejoice ∮
∮ 欢庆 ∮ ∮ Rejoice ∮
∮ 并高歌 ∮∮ ∮ And sing ∮
阁下，你将神圣的被涂油证明为… Sirs, you are hereby called to witness the anointing...
一个真正的君主，未来的派斯卡国王 of your one true lord and future king Pascal.
派斯卡，你愿意宣誓吗？ Pascal, are you willing to take the oath?
我愿意 I am willing.
那么你将被涂上… Then be thou anointed...
这圣油 with this holy oil.
你所选定的，英格兰、苏格兰和威尔士的主教， And do you, the chosen bishops of England, Scotland and Wales,
愿意涂上圣油吗？ ascent to this anointing?
为了苏格兰，我愿意 For Scotland, I do.
为了威尔士，我愿意 For Wales, I do.
为了英格兰，我不愿意！ For England, I do not!
英格力！ English!?
那家伙不能被加冕为国王，因为他是… That man must not be crowned king because he is...
一个骗子，一个吹牛者，还是一个贼 a fraudster, a charlatan and a thief.
没事，让他说下去 No, please. Let him speak.
这家伙，派斯卡·苏瓦吉 It is this man, Pascal Sauvage,
他偷了王室珠宝 who stole the Crown Jewels,
他强迫女王让位… who forced the queen to abdicate...
他会杀死所有挡他路的人 and who would kill anyone who got in his way.
结束了，英格力先生 It is the end, Herr English.
他已经欺骗并操纵… He has cheated, conned and manipulated...
这伟大的国家为他自己的目的所用 this great country for his own ends.
他愚弄了你们全部所有人！ He's fooled you all!
更有甚者，这整个典礼都是假的… What's more, this whole ceremony is a sham...
因为那个站在你们面前的人… because that man standing in front of you...
不是坎特伯雷大主教 is not the archbishop of Canterbury.
英格力，给你个忠告：别到那儿去 English, a word of advice: Don't go there.
闭嘴，法国佬，我愿意到哪儿就去哪儿 Shut it, Frenchy. I'll go wherever I damn well please.
现在把面具摘下来 什么？ Now take it off. What?
你的面具是塑胶造的 Your face is made of plastic.
立即摘掉 Remove it at once.
我不明白你在说些什么 I have no idea what you're talking about.
好吧 我自己动手摘掉它 Right. I'll just have to remove it myself.
赶快啊！ Come on!
或许要从前面来弄掉 Maybe it pulls up from the front.
快啊！ Come on, you!
啊！ 非常感谢 Aaah! Thank you very much.
某处定有连接的地方 Must be a join here somewhere.
总是神神道道，英格力先生 Fascinating performance as always, Monsieur English,
但我想我们必须继续 but I'm afraid we must move on.
没人可以离开，直到我最终揭穿这一切 Nobody's moving anywhere until I'm finished with this piece of low life.
你是否在你的… Do you or do you you not...
屁股上纹有如下文字 have tattooed on your bottom the words,
“天国已近，赶快加油？” "Jesus is coming... look busy?"
你是不是有神经病啊？ Are you insane?
好吧，让我们找出来看看，好吗？ Well, let's find out, shall we?
我们来看看 Go on, over. Let's have a look.
棒极了！ Excellent!
好吧，对于大主教的屁股我是搞错了 All right, so I was wrong about the archbishop's bottom.
但是还有 但是我恐怕今天没有了 But there's more. But not, I'm afraid, today.
警卫，把这家伙带走 Sergeant, please take this man away.
但对他要斯文点 你认为就那样了吗？ But be gentle with him. Do you think that's it?
你认为我就没有更多的证据了？ You think I don't have more evidence?
我最忠诚的属下争看着部DVD… My loyal subordinate is standing by with a DVD...
那里面有苏瓦吉对这个国家的丑恶计划 which shows Sauvage's hideous plans forthis country.
把他拖出去！把他拖出去！ Get him out! Get him out of here!
方啊，大宝！ 快播放那光盘！ 放啊！就现在！ Play it, Bough! Play the disk! Play it! Now!
∮ 你多么热辣戏弄我 ∮ ∮ You're so hot teasing me ∮
∮ 你正忧郁，但我不能趁机占你这样年轻女孩的便宜 ∮ ∮ So you're blue, but I can't take a chance on a chick like you ∮
∮ 这是我不会做的事 ∮ ∮ It's somethin' I couldn't do ∮
∮ 噢，我可以和你跳舞，宝贝如果你觉得这样有趣的话 ∮ ∮ Well, I can dance with you, honey if you think it's funny ∮
∮ 你妈妈知道你出来了吗？ ∮ ∮ Doesyour mother know that you're out ∮
∮ 我会对你叫嚣，宝贝，或许你可以风骚一些 ∮ ∮ And I could shout with you, baby Flirt a little, maybe ∮
∮ 你妈妈知道你出来了吗？ ∮ ∮ Doesyour mother know that you're out ∮
∮ 不要紧张 ∮ ∮ 不要紧张 ∮ ∮ Take it easy ∮ ∮ Take it easy ∮
∮ 最好慢一些，女孩，你无路可走 ∮ ∮ Better slow down, girl That's no way to go ∮
∮ 你妈妈知道你出来了吗？ ∮ ∮ Doesyour mother know ∮
诶！ 嘿！ Oi! Hey!
那么，我们继续吧？ Well, shall we?
那么正如所罗门王… Then as Solomon was anointed king...
让匝多克牧师和内森先知涂圣油为王 by Zadok the priest and Nathan the prophet,
所以你被涂以圣油… so be thou anointed...
尊崇为王… and consecrated king...
统治所有上帝… over all the peoples... whom the Lord thy God...
所分派与你的… hath given thee to govern...
人民… and of all your possessions,
及他们所在的 wherever they may be.
土地
那么，以天父之名… And so, in the name of the Father...
以圣子之名… and of the Son...
及圣灵之名 and of the Holy Ghost,
我为您加冕… I crown you
见鬼！ Damn it!
还给我！ 不！ Give it back! No!
那是我的王冠！ 决不给你！ That is my crown! Never!
还给我！ 数百万年都绝不给你，苏瓦吉！ Give it back! Never in a million years, Sauvage!
给我！ 下来 Give it to me! Get off.
见鬼！ Merde!
还给我！ Give it back!
停！ 闭嘴！ Stop! Shut up!
所有这些小国家要做的就是站成一条线… All this stupid little country have to do is stand in line...
干那些受难日该干的事！ and do what it's told for one miserable day!
但做不到呢？ But can it do that?
我的法国香屁股可以！ My fragrant French ass, it can!
见鬼！ Merde!
啊！ Aah!
给我加冕！快加冕！ Give it! The crown, eh? The crown! Go!
那么，以天父之名… And so, in the name of the Father...
以圣子之名，还有圣灵之名， and of the Son and of the Holy Ghost,
我加冕您为… I crown you...
国王 king.
什么… What
逮捕那家伙… Arrest that man...
把他锁起来抓走 and lock him away.
∮ 上帝救了国王，使国王长存 ∮ ∮ God save the king, Long live the king ∮
∮ 上帝救了国王 ∮ ∮ God save the king ∮
∮ 阿们，阿们，阿们，阿们，阿们，阿们 ∮ ∮ Amen, amen, amen, amen, Amen, amen ∮
∮ 啊，阿们，阿们，阿们，哈里路亚 ∮ ∮ Ahh, amen, amen, Amen, hallelujah ∮
∮ 阿们 ∮ ∮ Amen ∮
∮ 上帝救了国王 ∮ ∮ God save the king ∮
言语已不能表达我们对你们所做一切的由衷敬意 Words can hardly expressjust how much we appreciate everything you've done.
那都是我应该做的，夫人 Nothing more than my duty, ma'am.
作为回报，你的女王跟国家能为你做些什么呢？ And in return, is there anything that your queen and country can do for you?
嗯 Well,
因为有人要求，夫人… since one is asking, ma'am
在庆祝回归王位的庆典上， In celebration of her return to the throne,
女王宣布8月5日为国定假日… the queen has declaredAugust 5 a national holiday...
并授予无名的MI7探员骑士身份… and has conferred a knighthood on the unnamed MI7 agent...
以表彰他粉碎法国商人派斯卡·苏瓦吉的阴谋 responsible for foiling the plot of French businessman Pascal Sauvage.
苏瓦吉正等待着以叛国罪的审判 Mr Sauvage is now awaiting trial for high treason,
这是会处以极刑的罪名 a crime which still carries the death penalty.
如果发现有罪，他会被要求捐赠大脑来做医学研究… If found guilty, he's asked that his brain be donated to medical science...
来进一步探究狂躁精神病 to further research into the causes ofhyper manic schizophrenia.
期间，无名的英格力探员已经离开了这国家… Meanwhile, the unnamed English agent has left the country...
踏上了他下一个新的任务的征途 and has already embarked on his next challenging mission.
（法国南部某处）
强尼·英格力长官 Sir Johnny English.
女王看起来很感激的样子 Her Majesty did seem very grateful.
她不是唯一 She's not the only one.
嗯 你充满惊奇 Mmm. You are full of surprises.
啊！ Aaaah!
强尼！ 哦… Johnny! Oh, f...
∮ 一只眼看着阴影处 ∮ ∮ One eye on the shadows ∮
∮ 保护着他的同事 ∮ ∮ Protecting his fellows ∮
∮ 从日出到月光照在他背上 ∮ ∮ From sunup to the moon on his back∮
∮ 送坏蛋门进地狱，让女士门动心 ∮ ∮ Sendin' villains to Hades, A hit with the ladies ∮
∮ 布袋里的种马 ∮ ∮ A stallion in the sack ∮
∮ 当右跟着左时，你不能要回你的命，杰克 ∮ ∮ You can 't get your life back when right follows left, jack ∮
∮ 你看到的越多，明白越少 ∮ ∮ The more you see the less you know ∮
∮ 当别人泄露时，他的使命是秘密的 ∮ ∮ When others would leak it his service is secret ∮
∮ 当是你的时候时，上帝也帮忙 ∮ ∮ Plays God when it's your time to go ∮
∮ 嗨，伙计门，不要嫉妒 ∮ ∮ Hey, fellas Don 't be jealous ∮
（功臣英格力授勋为爵士）
∮ 当他们造他的时候弄坏了模子 ∮ ∮ When they made him they broke the mould ∮
∮ 有自发的超凡魅力 ∮ ∮ So charismatic with an automatic ∮
∮ 从来没有太早地开火，哈 ∮ ∮ Never prematurely shooting his load, ha ∮
∮ 女王和国家安全而强健 ∮ ∮ Queen and country safe and sound ∮
∮ 坏蛋们在地底下六英尺 ∮ ∮ With villains six feet underground ∮
∮ 而且没有人知道，因为没有人发现任何蛛丝马迹 ∮ ∮ And no one knows 'cause no one's found any trace ∮
∮ 一个男人的四季行踪 ∮ ∮ Of a man for all seasons ∮
∮ 爱他们，让他们在单独呆着 ∮ ∮ L oves 'em and leaves 'em alone ∮
∮ 独自呆着 ∮ ∮ So alone ∮
∮ 而我和你都没法知道 ∮ ∮ Andyou and I wouldn't have a clue ∮
∮ 谁会干什么，为什么，什么时候，以及对谁 ∮ ∮ Who's doin' what, why when and who ∮
∮ 在小溪里没有独木舟 ∮ ∮ Up a creek with no canoe ∮
∮ 一年四季要小心着那个人 ∮ ∮ Watch out for the man for all seasons ∮
∮ 爱他们，让他们在单独呆着 ∮ ∮ L oves 'em and leaves 'em alone ∮
∮ 多么孤单，只是在家很安全 ∮ ∮ So alone But safe at home ∮
∮ 只是在家很安全，只是在家很安全 ∮ ∮ But safe at home But safe at home ∮
∮ 女王和国家安全而强健 ∮ ∮ Queen and country safe and sound ∮
∮ 坏蛋们在地底下六英尺 ∮ ∮ With villains six feet underground ∮
∮ 而且没有人知道，因为没有人发现任何蛛丝马迹 ∮ ∮ And no one knows 'cause no one's found any trace ∮
∮ 一个男人的四季行踪 ∮ ∮ Of a man for all seasons ∮
∮ 爱他们，让他们在单独呆着 ∮ ∮ L oves 'em and leaves 'em alone ∮
∮ 独自呆着 ∮ ∮ So alone ∮
∮ 而我和你都没法知道 ∮ ∮ And you and I wouldn't have a clue ∮
∮ 谁会干什么，为什么，什么时候，以及对谁 ∮ ∮ Who's doin' what, why when and who ∮
∮ 在小溪里没有独木舟 ∮ ∮ Up a creek with no canoe ∮
∮ 一年四季要小心着那个人 ∮ ∮ Watch out for the man for all seasons ∮
∮ 爱他们，让他们在单独呆着 ∮ ∮ L oves 'em and leaves 'em alone ∮
∮ 独自呆着，只是在家很安全 ∮ ∮ So alone But safe at home ∮
∮ 女王和国家安全而强健 ∮ ∮ Queen and country Safe and sound ∮
∮ 坏蛋们在地底下六英尺 ∮ ∮ With villains six feet underground ∮
∮ 而且没有人知道，因为没有人发现任何蛛丝马迹 ∮ ∮ And no one knows 'cause no one's found any trace ∮
∮ 一个男人的四季行踪 ∮ ∮ Of a man for all seasons ∮
∮ 爱他们，让他们在单独呆着 ∮ ∮ L oves 'em and leaves 'em alone ∮
∮ 独自一人 ∮ ∮ So alone ∮
∮ 而我和你都没法知道 ∮ ∮ And you and I wouldn't have a clue ∮
∮ 谁会干什么，为什么，什么时候，以及对谁 ∮ ∮ Who's doin' what, why when and who ∮
∮ 在小溪里没有独木舟 ∮ ∮ Up a creek with no canoe ∮
∮ 一年四季要小心着那个人 ∮ ∮ Watch out for the man for all seasons ∮
∮ 爱他们，让他们在单独呆着 ∮ ∮ L oves 'em and leaves 'em alone ∮
∮ 独自呆着 ∮ ∮ So alone ∮
∮ 只是在家很安全 ∮ ∮ But safe at home ∮
∮ 噢 噢 噢，吔 ∮∮ ∮ Oh Oh Ohh, yeah ∮∮