能再给我们上一轮酒吗 Hey, could we get one more round, ease?
算达头蒂的 It's on a tab--Bighetti.
-没问题 马上来 -谢谢 -Sure. Coming up. -Cool. Thanks.
看看哪位大人物来了 Well, well, look who's the big shot.
大酒桶[shot也有一杯酒的意思] Yeah, big shot.
你们最近怎么样 How are you guys?
'纽核力'一切顺利吗 everything good over at nucleus?
'纽核力'就是扯淡 你是怎么做到的 Nucleus is dog shit. How do you do it, man?
你曾经是整个'纽核力'组里 You used to be the most useless guy
最没用的一个 in the entire nucleus team,
但现在你一个人负责一整个部门 but now you run an entire division.
你扪心自问过这是为什么吗 Did you ever ask yourself why?
没有 我从来没想过 No. No, I never have.
你到底有什么技能 Do you have any skill at all
除了总能戏剧化地搞砸之外 other than magically failing your way to the top?
我有艘船 I have a boat.
不过这大概不能算是一项技能 I guess that's not really a skill.
去他妈的大头 Fucking Big Head, man.
去他妈的大头 Fucking Big Head.
保重 Take care.
你忘拿手机了 Hey, you forgot your phone.
至少我觉得这是你的 At least I think this is your--
卧槽 Holy shit.
是吧 Right?
这就是'纽核力' This is nucleus?
没错 Yep.
这是他们整个移动平台的测试版本 That is a beta of their entire mobile platform,
烂透了 And it sucks.
这用户体验简直就是苏联时代的 Yeah. I mean, the ux is, like, Soviet-era.
实际上它保存的图片甚至会变大 When it stores photos, they actually get larger.
他们根本没搞明白发散法 They never cracked middle-out.
其实我有点希望你没给我看这个 I actually kind of wish you didn't show me this,
因为现在我知道我们肯定能打败他们 because now I know we totally would have beaten them.
但如今 我们没有拿到投资 As it is now, I mean, we can't get funded.
所有新程序员都退出了 all of our new coders quit.
你可以想象一下 I mean, can you even imagine what would happen
如果一个技术博客拿到了这破玩意儿会怎么样 if, like, a tech blog got their hands on that piece of shit?
他们会把它完全公布出去 They'd tear it apart.
这可以彻底毁掉'纽核力'的发布 I mean, it could actually totally destroy nucleus' release.
我敢打赌盖文会倾尽全力 I bet Gavin would do, shit, anything
防止这种事情发生 对吗 to prevent that from happening, right?
当然 Yeah, totally.
理查德 你竟然还没想到我要说什么吗 Jesus, Richard, am I actually ahead of you on this?
拿着手机吧 老兄 Take the phone, man.
是你的了 拿着吧 It's yours. Take it.
你是认真的吗 Are--are you serious?
当然 老兄 我欠你的 Yeah, dude. Come on, I owe you.
我本来都要离开'互利'打道回府了 I mean, I was about to quit hooli and move home.
然后盖文提拔了我 就为了报复你 And then Gavin promoted me just to spite you.
现在他不停提拔我 And now he keeps promoting me
也不知道因为什么 for some inexplicable reason.
我一无是处 理查德 I mean, I haven't done anything, Richard--
甚至还更糟 I mean, less than nothing.
也没错 Well, yeah.
但看看现在的我 But look at me now.
我们正坐在我的船上 理查德 We're sitting on my boat, Richard,
全都是因为你 And that's because of you.
很快我们能开着它去夏威夷 Soon we can sail it to fucking Hawaii
或者索萨利托[加州城市] or Sausalito.
再上三节课 我就能拿到驾船执照 Three more classes, and I get my boat license.
真的吗 总共要上几节课 Oh, really? How many classes does it take?
三节 总共三节 Three. It's three classes.
听说可以花钱请人代考 I heard you can pay somebody to take the test for you,
但我还没抽出时间来搞定这件事 but I just haven't got around to it yet.
第
二
季
第
九
集
硅
谷
别再惺惺作态了行吗 理查德 Enough with your coy bullshit, Richard, okay?
我知道你他妈有我的测试机 I know you have my goddamn phone.
我他妈到底怎样才能拿回来 What the fuck do I have to do to get it back?
我在考虑 Well, I was thinking
用你的帮助来交换 你 that in exchange for my help, you--
抱歉 等一下 I'm sorry, hold on.
你不能用"交换"这个词 You can't use the term "in exchange."
这意味着有因果关系 基本等同于勒索 It implies causality. That's basically extortion.
他的所作所为必须不是被强迫的 Any actions he takes must be un-coerced
必须出于自愿 and of his own volition.
继续 Go.
盖文·贝尔森
喂 又是我 Hello. It's me again.
我在想 如果你找到了你的手机 I was thinking that if you found your phone,
你也许就会心情大好 you might be so happy
就会因此愿意对我们撤诉 that you would be inclined to drop the lawsuit.
我为什么要这么做 Why would I do that?
如果你找到了你的手机 Because if you found your phone,
就意味着不会有技术博主 that would mean that no tech bloggers
或者记者找到 or journalists did,
他们就不会根据你手机里的东西 And they couldn't write a scathing review
写篇贬损的评测 因为你的测试版烂透了 based on what was on it, as it sucks.
谁知道呢 说不定'互利'股票会因此大跌 Who knows? It might even cause Hooli stock to crash
某人的事业也会因此玩完 or certain careers to be ruined.
理查德 你是在威胁我吗 Richard, are you threatening me?
我是在威胁你吗 Am I threatening you?
这问题提得不错 That's a good question.
不是 Um, no.
如果你他妈不把我的手机还回来 If you don't give me my fucking phone back,
我会找到你 把你强按到桌子上 I'm gonna find you, bend you over your desk
然后猛操你 直到你的门牙 and fuck you so hard, your front teeth--
等下 Hold on.
你不能威胁他 特别是威胁要鸡奸他 You can't threaten him, especially not sexually.
这个小杂种会捅出大篓子的 This little shit could cause major damage here.
我到底能说什么 What am I allowed to say?
理查德 又是我 Richard, it's me again.
我在 Yes.
我的想法如下 Here's my concern.
如果我的手机到了某位记者的手里 If my phone ends up in the hands of a journalist,
帕罗奥图的警察局长艾德·加斯金斯 Palo Alto Chief of Police Ed Gaskins,
顺便说一句 跟此事无关 who, apropos of nothing,
他跟我的私交很好 happens to be a close personal friend of mine,
他会出面找此人问清楚 would have to go and ask this person
他们怎样拿到我的手机的 where they got my phone.
记住 他们可不算真正的记者 理查德 Keep in mind, these aren't real journalists, Richard.
他们是科技记者 They're tech journalists.
你认为他们会为了保护消息来源而入狱吗 Do you think they'd go to prison to protect their source?
我也不这么认为 I don't either.
而且因为这手机是被偷走的原型机 And since this phone's os is a stolen prototype
价值四千到六千万 worth $40 to $60 million,
你这可是犯了盗窃重罪呢 理查德 You're looking at felony grand theft, Richard.
可以判你个四十年 You can go to jail for 40 years.
不过嘛 像你这样的人 Then again, you'd probably be fine
在狱中蹲满刑期兴许是小菜一碟 in a full-blown hard time penitentiary.
你想想 他们会给你的菊花褪毛 I mean, after they waxed your rectum
再敲掉你的门牙 and knocked out all your front teeth
好让你更容易适应环境 just to make things easier.
盖文 你要是不需要我的帮助 You know, Gavin, if you don't want my help,
盖文·贝尔森
那就只好走着瞧了 then I guess we'll just see what happens.
好啊 理查德 All right, Richard.
那我们该怎么做 So what do we do here?
我不知道 I don't know.
你说该怎么做 What do we do here?
保罗 你在吗 Paul, are you there?
罗恩 Ron?
好啊哥们 山姆和梅琳达也都在呢吧 Hey, buddy. Sam and Melinda there, too?
在呢 打个招呼 They are. They say hi.
你好啊 罗恩 Hey, Ron.
你们好啊 小子们 What up, kids?
我十分钟后再跟你们联系 Let me hit you back in 10
咱们那时再细谈吧 and we'll sidebar this.
具约束力的仲裁 那是什么 Binding arbitration? What's that?
和开庭差不多 但是速度快多了 Well, it's like a trial but massively accelerated.
下周我们会在一位退休法官主持下 Next week we're gonna go in front of a retired judge
在两天之内把我们的案子 and argue our whole lawsuit
理清楚 然后就没事了 in just two days, and then we're done.
也就是说下周就都解决了 So this will all be resolved next week?
我早就想参加具约束力的仲裁了 I've always wanted to go to binding arbitration.
你早就想做的事还真是奇怪啊 A weird thing to have always wanted to do.
每一个告过我的人 Everybody who's ever sued me
都庭外和解了 没种的软蛋 has settled out of court. Pussies.
这回我终于能够英勇出战 Now finally I'll be able to take the stand,
唱他一出好戏了 be a part of the big show.
没什么好戏 这可是严肃的 No show. This is a serious
法律仲裁程序 明白吗 legal proceeding, okay?
说到这个 And speaking to that,
罗恩·拉弗兰梅给我们新请了位诉讼律师 Ron Laflamme has got us a new litigator
我们一小时后见他 and we are meeting him in an hour.
我们哪来的钱请他呢 Um, how are we gonna pay this person?
这位律师在我们的案子解决之前 Our guy has agreed to wave his entire fee
分文不取 until our case is resolved.
完了 是个 Oh, it's some wet behind
刚从法学院毕业的小菜鸟 the ears noob straight out of law school.
不是 据说他经验非常丰富 No, he is said to be very experienced,
是律师圈里的顶尖高手之一 one of the best in the biz.
那他怎么会冒险接我们这个案子 Then why the fuck would he take our case on spec?
我被捕时是否持有可卡因 安非他明 Was I in possession of cocaine, amphetamines,
硝酸戊酯也称作松菊剂等药物 amyl nitrate, also known as poppers, at the time of my arrest?
确实如此且数量甚巨 In large quantities.
我是否曾和两名未成年女性 Did I have consensual intercourse
进行过双方自愿的性行为 with two women under the age of 18?
不止一次 这我承认 Repeatedly. I admit this.
我是否违反曼恩法案[禁止贩卖妇女卖淫] Did I violate the Mann Act and transport them
跨州运送她们以满足我的性需求呢 across state lines for sexual purposes?
虽有指控 却从未证实 Alleged but not proven.
费了他们老大的劲也没成功 And, boy, they tried. They tried.
因此我被判监禁并吊销律师资格 Therefore, I was incarcerated and I was disbarred.
慢着 你被吊销资格了 Wait, hold on. You were disbarred?
也就是说你不能上庭 So you can't practice law?
在加州境内不能参与正式诉讼 Not in open court in the state of California.
这一点没错 但这次只是仲裁 That's correct. But this is arbitration.
我非常感激你们给我这次机会 I'm really grateful for the opportunity.
我改过自新了 I'm turning my life around.
我也付出代价坐了牢 I've served my time.
有疑问吗 Questions?
我有一个问题 I guess I have one at least.
硝酸戊酯是干什么用的 Um, what does amyl nitrate do?
帮助扩张肛周肌肉的 Oh, it dilates the anus.
说得很对 That is accurate.
同时也会产生快感 Also produces euphoria.
谢谢彼得和贾里德的深入教导 Okay, thank you, Pete and Jared.
-客气 -扩肛的事先放一边 -Sure. -Anal dilation aside,
你对我们的案子怎么看 what do you think of our case?
你觉得我们能把那些个'互利'的垃圾 You think we're gonna go in there and just dick-slap
打得落花流水吗 those Hooli pieces of shit?
你们的案子我看过了 I have reviewed your case
对你们非常有利 and it is extremely strong.
感谢上帝 Thank God.
同感谢 我每天怀着感恩的心 I do, every day of my life.
蒙上帝的恩典 我才得以 It's only by his grace that I was able to survive
走出人生峡谷 that plunge into the ravine
挺过11个月的铁窗生涯 and 11 months in the state penitentiary.
不好意思 你是指比喻意义上的峡谷 I'm sorry, were you in an emotional ravine
还是你真的去过峡谷 or did you actually go into a ravine?
都有 Both.
如果各位没问题的话 Now, with your approval,
我就要进行下一步工作了 I would like to move forward.
我现在没有办公室 I currently am not in possession of an office
眼下正住在教习所里 and I'm residing in a halfway house,
所以我想把你们的地址发给'互利'律师团 so I would like to give Hooli legal your home address.
为什么 Why?
他们需要把披露文件送到你们手上 They need to send over their discovery documents,
全部都送来 all of them.
全部 All of them?
这简直疯了 This is craziness.
就不能通过电子邮件发过来吗 Couldn't they have just emailed all this?
绝大多数都是电邮印到纸上而已 I mean, it's mostly just printed-out emails anyway.
是啊 他们当然可以那么做 Yeah, of course they could have.
不过那样一来就可以进行数据检索了 And it would have been digitally searchable,
关键就在这里 and that is the point.
就是要拿文件淹死你 It's a classic document dump.
不过他们没想到的是 But what they didn't take into account is
我们大家有力量 the power of us.
所以赶紧搬一箱吧 两位 So grab a box, guys.
把你们认为有关的内容都挑出来 Start pulling anything you think is relevant.
也许是有很多工作要做 And you may have to work pretty hard,
不过至少我们就此自由不用审判了 but it will free us from this lawsuit.
你刚才是说"劳动带来自由"吗 Are you saying, "Work will set you free"?
正是 他们有人力 Yes. They have the manpower.
我们有毅力 这就是意志的胜利 We have the perseverance. Triumph of the will.
在所有引用希特勒话的人中 He's the most cheerful person
他是我见过最开心的一个 I've ever heard quote Hitler.
'互利'的整个知识产权诉讼 So Hooli's entire intellectual property claim
可以归结到三个问题上 boils down to three simple questions.
你开发'魔笛手'的时间是否和 Did your work on Pied Piper at any time overlap
在'互利'的工作时间重叠过 with your scope of work or Hooli business?
没有 Uh, no.
你在'互利'工作时间内开发过'魔笛手'吗 Did you ever do work on pied piper on Hooli time?
没有 Uh, no.
你是不是也没有用过任何'互利'的设备 And at no time did you ever use Hooli equipment
开发过'魔笛手' to develop Pied Piper in any way?
没 绝没有 No, never.
那我们就没问题 你如实在庭上讲就行了 We're on our way then. You just tell that honestly to the court,
然后我们就万事大吉 and we're home free.
好吧 Okay.
除非 你曾经 Unless, of course, you've offered
向别人提供过上述答案的不同版本 a conflicting version of that to anyone--
朋友啊 父母啊 a friend, your parents,
或者女朋友 a girlfriend.
没有 没有 不可能 No, no, and not possible.
我都三年没交过女朋友了 I haven't had a girlfriend in, like, three years.
男朋友 A boyfriend?
我不是同性恋 只是很忙 No. I'm not gay, just busy.
我们这次诉讼跟你的性向无关 We're not litigating your sexuality.
那就好 That's good, yeah.
那也是件好事 因为如果有关的话 It's a good thing, too, because if we were,
我们就都要进监狱了 是吧 we'd all end up in prison. Am I right?
无意冒犯 No offense.
给 我弄了个初稿 你们看看吧 Here, I did a first pass. Let me know what you think.
只是一些我作证时你需要问我的问题 Just a few questions for you to ask me while I'm on the stand.
这只是初稿 我们随时可以修改 It's rough clay. We can shape it as we go.
你知道我并没有打算让你出庭作证吧 You realize I have no intention of ever putting you on the stand?
什么 为什么 What? Why not?
我只是认为你对这个案件没有帮助 Well, I just don't think you have anything to offer the case.
他们想要试图证明'魔笛手'创始于'互利' They're trying to say that Pied Piper was created at Hooli,
但我就是最好的证据 whereas I'm living proof
能证明这个软件创建于我的孵化器 that it was created here in my incubator.
是我把理查德一手培养起来的 I nurtured Richard like a little baby.
我是他的赞助人 就像波吉亚家族和达芬奇 I was his patron, like the Borgias with Da Vinci.
事实上达芬奇的赞助人是美第奇家族 Actually, the Medici were Da Vinci's patrons.
波吉亚家族只会给人下毒 The Borgias poisoned people.
-再说一次美第奇 -美第奇 -Say Medici again. -Medici.
-闭嘴 -就是这么发音的 -Shut the fuck up. -That's how you pronounce it.
我们要先讲清楚 Let's be clear, okay?
举证的责任在'互利'身上 The burden of proof falls on Hooli here.
但他们什么证据也没有 And they have none.
你有一把巴雷特50口径步枪任你支配 You have a Barrett 50-caliber rifle at your disposal
你可以用它直接爆了盖文·贝尔森的头 that you can use to shoot Gavin Belson in the goddamn face.
但你却不用 And you're not gonna use it?
你这个上庭律师是怎么当的 What kind of fucking attorney are you?
事实上在重新拿到执照 Well, technically, I can't refer to myself as an attorney
并赔偿我的受害人家属前 until I'm reinstated
我不能说自己是上庭律师 and make restitution to my victims' families.
我是律师 而且我很棒 I'm a lawyer. And I'm a good one.
如果你真的了解巴雷特50口径 And if you know one end of a Barrett 50-cal from the other,
我就吃翔一碗 I'll eat a bowl of shit.
你是不是尝过未排出前第一手的味道 Did you get a taste for that on the inside, hmm?
伙计们 母秃鹫已经两周 Hey, guys, it's been almost two weeks
没有去过巢穴了 since the mother condor has been to the nest.
你们认为有没有可能是蛋出了什么问题 Do you think something may be wrong with the egg?
是有问题 问题就是我们的网站在直播它 Something is. It's on our website.
不 说真的 No, really. I mean,
我想也许我该给博物馆打个电话问问情况 I think maybe I should call the museum, see if this is normal.
贾里德 你希望那枚蛋活着是吧 Jared, you want that egg to be alive, right?
-当然 -那么现在来看 -Of course. -Well, right now,
因为你不知道它到底是不是活的 because you don't know whether it is or not,
所以两种情况都有可能 it exists in both states,
就像薛定谔的猫一样 like Schrodinger's cat.
像什么 Like what?
那是一个量子力学思想实验 It's a quantum mechanics thought experiment
由一位奥地利物理学家提出 that an Austrian physicist came up with
用于帮助人们理解量子态的概念 to help understand quantum states.
他假设将一只猫 So he imagined putting a cat
放进一个装了有毒食物的盒子 into a box with poisoned food.
猫吃了有毒食物或没吃的概率各一半 There's a 50/50 chance the cat eats it.
这倒确实像奥地利人会干的事 That does sound rather Austrian.
根据薛定谔的理论 如果你打开盒子 So according to Schrodinger if you open the box,
确认猫已经死了 and confirm that the cat is dead,
那么某种意义来讲 就是你杀了那只猫 then in a sense, you've killed the cat.
所以如果你打电话给博物馆询问 Or if you call the museum and get the information
那你就杀害了那只蛋 then you've killed the egg.
不会的 这太可笑了 No, that's silly.
是吗 Is it?
好吧 Okay.
我要再考虑一下 I'm just gonna think about it for a minute.
理查德 Richard.
什么事 Yeah?
-我们有个问题 -怎么了 -We have a problem. -What's up?
明天我们就要去仲裁了 You and I are going into arbitration tomorrow.
我需要你看着我的眼睛 I need you to look me right in the eye
告诉我你为什么要骗我 and tell me why you've been lying to me.
我没有骗你 I haven't been lying to you.
你告诉我你三年没交过女朋友了 You told me you haven't had a girlfriend for three years.
我发现了至少15封你在去年 I have found at least 15 emails to Nelson Bighetti
发给尼尔森·达头蒂的邮件中都提到了女朋友 in the last year where you reference a girlfriend.
今天和女友在床上躺了一天 "Spent the day in bed with my girlfriend."
咖啡店里的流浪汉 "A homeless guy in the coffee shop
差点偷了我的女朋友 almost stole my girlfriend."
那是个玩笑 大头和我 It's a joke. Big head and I--
我们管自己的笔记本电脑叫女朋友 we call my laptop my girlfriend
因为那是近段时期 because it's the only warm thing
唯一会碰到我们裆部的发热的东西 that's touched my crotch in a little while.
所以当你在说 So when you said, quote,
我女朋友昨晚把床上搞得一团糟 "My girlfriend shit the bed last night,"
-那也是说你的笔记本 -是的 -that was your laptop? -Laptop, yeah.
那就太好了 Well, that's good to hear.
等等 Oh, wait a minute.
等等 等等 Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
听这个 Now listen to this.
4月10日 晚11点14分 April 10th, 11:14 p.m.
带我的女朋友去苹果店 "Taking my girlfriend to the Apple Store."
4月12日 下午3点42分 April 12th, 3:42 p.m.
去商场接我的女朋友 "Picking my girlfriend up at the mall."
所以呢 Yeah, so?
所以你的电脑被送去店里三天 对吗 So your laptop was in the shop for three days, right?
从10号到12号 对吗 The 10th through the 12th, right?
是啊 怎么了 Yeah, and?
4月11日 下午2点48分 April 11th, 2:48 p.m.
在午饭期间测试感知编码器 "Ran a test of the perceptual modeler during lunch,
做了几处细微调整 made a few tweaks and,
软件性能简直有了飞跃 wow, it's working on a whole new level."
这只意味着一切顺利 Yeah, that just means that it's going great,
软件开发步入正轨 that it's working really well.
理查德 理查德 Richard, Richard,
你没带自己的笔记本电脑去'互利' You didn't have your laptop with you at Hooli.
那你当时是用哪一台电脑 What computer did you use
做测试的 to run that test that day?
该死 Oh, shit.
理查德 你没用'互利'的电脑吧 Richard, you didn't use a Hooli computer?
告诉我你没有用该死的'互利'电脑 Tell me that you didn't use a Hooli fucking computer.
我 我不知道 好吧 I--I don't know. Yeah, yeah, okay.
好吧 我好像用了 Yes, I--I think I did.
操 我只用了一次而已 对吧 Fuck, I mean, I just used it once though, right?
应该不是什么大问题吧 I mean, that's not--that's not a big deal.
问题大了 我们完了 就是这样 It's a huge deal. We're done. That's it.
-就怎样了 -该死 -What's it? -God damn it.
根据法律 '互利'有权利获得 Well, under the law, Hooli can lay claim
'魔笛手'公司拥有的知识产权 to the underlying intellectual property that makes up Pied Piper.
所以我们完蛋了 对吧 我们死定了 So we're fucked now, is that it? We're totally fucked?
这都取决于'互利'的律师 Well, I mean, it all depends on whether or not
是否能发现 the attorneys at Hooli figure out
你的女朋友就是你的笔记本电脑 that your girlfriend is your laptop.
你是说这整个案子的关键在于 Are you just telling us this entire case just
人们是否相信理查德有女朋友 hinges on people believing that Richard had a girlfriend?
我们完蛋了 We are fucked.
这两天将会十分漫长 All right, this is gonna be a long two days,
所以请大家尽量长话短说 so let's try to keep things brief.
法官大人 我应该能帮忙加快进度 Your Honor, I think I can help speed things along.
我们愿意承认 We are willing to concede
除了知识产权所有权这一项外 to all the numerous counts brought by Mr. Belson,
贝尔森先生提出的所有指控 except the ones regarding the ownership of intellectual property.
是吗 Is that right?
我的当事人愿意承认 On the non-solicit violation,
他违背了非竞争性合约 my client is willing to concede
对唐纳德·邓恩进行了不当聘用 that Donald Dunn was improperly hired.
而关于不当得利的罪名 And on the unjust enrichment charge,
理查德愿意付给'互利' Richard will agree to repay Hooli
39美元99美分 39 dollars and 99 cents
以赔付他带回家的 for the phone charger
手机充电器 以及其他指控 that he took home, and so on.
多谢你 莫纳汉先生 Thank you, Mr. Monahan,
帮助加快仲裁进度 for accelerating the process.
我们开始吧 原告 Okay, let's start this. Plaintiff?
好了 理查德 开始了 Okay, Richard, here it goes.
他们要是先传你作证 我们就完了 They call you first, we're toast.
我有点想吐 I think I'm gonna puke.
法官大人 我方想请出第一位证人 Your honor, we'd like to call our first witness.
我们想传唤 We would like to call
尼尔森·达头蒂 也就是大头 Nelson Bighetti, A.K.A. Big head.
等等 你确定吗 这里写着禁止进入 Wait, are you sure? 'cause it says "No admittan--"
好吧 Okay.
你说的没错 就是这里 Yeah, you were right. It's this one.
到我了吗 Is that me?
抱歉 理查德 I'm sorry, Richard.
首先 先生 我真是三生有幸 Firstly, sir, let me say it is a privilege
能与像您一般功成名就的人交谈 to be speaking to someone as accomplished as you.
好吧 Okay.
你曾是'魔笛手'最早的成员之一 You were one of the earliest members of the Pied Piper team,
是吗 were you not?
自你离开之后 And since your departure,
你简直是平步青云 your rise has been meteoric.
你是否在一个月内被'互利'提拔了三次 Haven't you received three Hooli promotions in a month?
是的 是这样没错 Uh, yeah. Yeah, I guess that is right.
似乎所有事只要经你之手 It seems like everything you touch
都化腐朽为神奇 达头蒂先生 is made dramatically better, Mr. Bighetti.
你对所负责的一切都做出了 You make a meaningful and crucial contribution
意义重大且至关重要的贡献 不是吗 to everything you do, do you not?
等等 Wa--wait.
抱歉 什么我不是吗 I'm--I'm sorry. Do I not?
你是要问我确实做了 Are you asking if I do do that
还是没有做 or if I don't do that?
太棒了 他们什么证据都没有 This is amazing. They have nothing.
这是孤注一掷 It's a desperate play.
他们想要塑造他的形象 They're trying to build him up,
让别人看来他在'魔笛手'不可或缺 make it seem like he was a crucial part of Pied Piper.
真是老天保佑 他们什么证据都没有 It's a Hail Mary. They have nothing.
因为如果我并没有没有做 Because if I don't not do that,
那不就意味着我 isn't that the same as--
我们继续好吗 Let's move on. Okay.
《连线》是否曾 Is it not true that Wired--
我重新组织一下语言 I'll rephrase.
《连线》杂志曾为你做了一期封面采访吗 Did Wired magazine run a cover story on you?
是还是不是 Yes or no?
是的 Oh, yes.
确实有这回事 That did happen, yes.
我可能犯了个错误 I think I just made a mistake.
是博物馆那边 That was the museum.
我给博物馆打电话想了解兀鹫的情况 I decided to call and check on the condor,
他们说有很大可能 and they said that it's very unlikely
兀鹫蛋已经没有生命了 that the condor egg is still alive.
可是我的电话 But my phone call itself
让他们意识到浏览人数很低 drew their attention to their low viewing numbers
于是决定今天把摄像头取下来 and they've decided to take down the cameras today.
所以因为你打那通电话 So by making the phone call,
你很可能杀死了那枚兀鹫蛋 you've most likely killed the condor egg.
得了吧 我是说 Oh, come on, I mean,
薛定谔的猫都是理论而已 that schrodinger stuff's all just theoretical.
在这里不适用 It doesn't apply here.
是吗 你看看理查德 Doesn't it? I mean, look at Rchard.
他在莫纳汉打开邮件盒子之前 He didn't know that he had tested on a Hooli computer
不知道自己是否用'互利'的电脑做过测试 until Monahan opened that box of emails, right?
所以理查德即可能无辜 也可能有罪 So Richard was both innocent and guilty,
但只要莫纳汉一打开盒子 but as soon as Monahan opened that box,
他就确定理查德有罪了 it made Richard guilty.
可按照这个逻辑 But, I mean, by that logic,
所有去了开馆葬礼的人都是凶手 nyone who goes to an open-casket funeral is a murderer.
你这个丧心病狂的混蛋 贾里德 You are one dark motherfucker, Jared.
所以 达头蒂先生 你刚说 So, Mr. Bighetti, you have stated
你对'魔笛手' that you didn't have
毫无贡献 anything to do with Pied Piper.
是的 No.
那你应该也会说 I suppose you'd also say
自己对'互利'未知数部门毫无贡献了 that you had nothing to do with Hooli XYZ either.
对 没有关系 No, not really.
以及你作为主席的 And what about the Hooli AIDS and cancer societies
'互利'艾滋病及癌症学会 of which you were president?
你和那些有关系吗 Did you have anything to do with those?
其实没什么关系 我还记得 Honestly, not really. I actually remember
他们告诉艾滋病那事的时候 when they told me I got the AIDS thing,
有一瞬间我还以为他们是说我得了艾滋 for just a second I thought they were telling me that I had AIDS.
但后来我意识到 我没病 我只是 But then I realized, no, I was just
成为了那个艾滋什么的主席 the president of the AIDS thingy.
但那个瞬间还是挺吓人的 But for a second it was pretty scary there.
如你所闻 法官大人 尼尔森·达头蒂 You see, Your Honor, Nelson Bighetti
谦虚得有些病态 is pathologically modest.
虽然他谦虚地否认这些功劳 但记录显示 While he humbly denies credit, the record shows
他与这些成就密不可分 that he had everything to do with all of these achievements.
也许尼尔森也是真的相信 It may be possible that Nelson actually believes
他与'魔笛手'的创立 he didn't have that much
没什么关系 to do with the founding of Pied Piper either.
因为... 'Cause...
但异常明显的是 But it is painfully obvious
他与之大有关系 that he had a huge hand in it.
法官大人 我问完了 No further questions, Your Honor.
我得说 达头蒂先生 终于遇到一位 May I say, Mr. Bighetti, how refreshing it is
搞科技却并不做作自大的人 to finally encounter someone in the tech community
真是让我耳目一新 who is so free of pretension and ego?
有麻烦了 Well, that was troubling.
对啊 刚到底怎么回事 Yeah, what was that?
他刚刚赢得了法官的好感 It's just that he scored big points with the Judge in there.
我们怎么办 我们要去 So what's our plan? Do we go in there
损得他体无完肤吗 and cross the shit out of him?
给他捅出个新屁眼 Tear him a new hole in his butt?
我们可别忘了 Let's just remind ourselves here
是他把手机拿给我 让这一切化为可能 that he gave me the phone and made this whole thing possible.
别对他下手太狠 So let's take it easy on him.
我也觉得让他身败名裂不是好主意 Yeah, I don't think shredding him is the right way to go either.
-谢谢 -可能会事与愿违 -Thank you. -It could backfire,
让法官讨厌我们 turn the judge against us.
我另有主意 I have something else in mind.
巴赫曼先生 你还能作证吗 Mr. Bachmann, are you still prepared to testify?
我他妈当然能了 Fuck yes, I am.
巴赫曼先生 Mr. Bachmann.
我是 先生 Yes, sir?
你是亨德里克斯和达头蒂先生 You are the owner and sole proprietor
居住的位于帕罗奥多 of the Palo Alto-based hacker hostel
黑客宿舍的房主 in which Mr. Hendricks and Mr. Bighetti
及唯一的业主 对吗 both resided. Is that correct?
是的 没错 Yes, sir. That is, in fact, correct.
那里一直被称为 It has been called
科技界的伊甸园 the garden of tech Eden.
而且你作为一名商人的所有直觉 Is it also fair to say that every instinct you have
都是完全错误的 as a businessman
我这么说不为过吧 has been completely and totally wrong?
你说什么 Sorry, what?
你听力不好吗 巴赫曼先生 You hard of hearing, Mr. Bachmann?
不 我都听到了 No, I've heard everything...
周围的人都觉得你是全市的笑柄吧 Aren't you considered a joke in this town?
我不知道你这是想干什么 I don't quite know where you're going with this.
我也不知道 你能告诉我们 Nor do I. Can you tell us
你到底想证明什么吗 莫纳汉先生 where you're headed here, Mr. Monahan?
法官大人 如果你同意 Your Honor, if you are to accept
'互利'对达头蒂先生的重视 Hooli's reverence for Mr. Bighetti
可以作为他是天才的证据 as proof that he's a genius,
那你也必须同意 then you must also accept
巴赫曼先生对达头蒂先生的重视 Mr. Bachmann's reverence for Mr. Bighetti
可以作为他是个蠢货的证据 as proof that he's a moron.
我只是想证明 I'm simply establishing
这种逻辑 法官大人 两者都说得通 this type of logic, Your Honor, cuts both ways.
我懂了 请继续 I see. I'll allow it.
不是吧 我可不... Really? Because I don't--
巴赫曼先生 你开办孵化器 Mr. Bachmann, you have incubated
资助了一系列 a seemingly endless string
被公认为很失败的软件 对吗 of patently unsuccessful apps, haven't you?
不 不对 No. No, that is not correct.
'魔笛手'是我孵化的 我看到了它的价值 I incubated Pied Piper. I saw the value in that.
是吗 在亨德里克斯先生 Oh, did you? Isn't it true
成为竞价对象前 that you were about to evict Mr. Hendricks
你不是正要驱逐他吗 until he became the subject of a bidding war?
你不喜欢'魔笛手' You disliked Pied Piper...
这个在你的宿舍里唯一有前景的软件 the one app in your hostel that showed promise.
这话有点刻薄了 驱逐什么的... Well, I think that's a bit harsh. I mean, ev--
你还曾鼓励亨德里克斯先生 In fact, you tried to encourage Mr. Hendricks
将他的软件变成 to change his app to be more like
达头蒂先生开发的那种 Mr. Bighetti's horrendous app
名为'乳报'的骇人软件 对吗 called Nip Alert. Isn't that true?
是的 我认为'乳报'很有潜力 Well, yes, I thought Nip Alert showed great promise.
它根本没展示出任何潜力 It did not show great promise.
它只展示出了 What it showed was the location
附近激凸女人的具体方位 of nearby women possessing erect nipples.
正因如此 达头蒂先生的怪诞产物 And as such, Mr. Bighetti's grotesque creation
没有获得市里除你以外 was passed over by every investor
任何一名投资者的青睐 in this town except you,
因为那软件很变态 because it was perverted.
我承认 眼下 Well, I'll admit that--I'll concede
那种文化潮流 that the cultural moment
已经过去了 但在当时... may have passed, but at the time--
那软件当时也和现在一样歧视女性 No, at the time, it was as misogynistic as it is now,
不是吗 巴赫曼先生 wasn't it, Mr. Bachmann?
没错 它是有几个重大问题 It--yes, it had some major problems--
几个重大问题 巴赫曼先生 几分钟前 Some major problems? Mr. Bachmann, a few moments ago
你还说它有潜力呢 you said that it showed great promise.
你确实说过 我可以让法庭书记员 You said that. I can have the court reporter
读给你听 巴赫曼先生 read it back to you, Mr. Bachmann.
不用她念给我听 我记得... I don't need her to read it back to me. I can remember--
'乳报'的构架很差 Nip alert was poorly conceived
而且程序满是问题 不是吗 and riddled with bugs, wasn't it?
所有软件在开始时... Well, all apps in the beginning--
巴赫曼先生 回答问题 Mr. Bachmann, answer the question.
你喜欢'乳报' 而它很烂 You liked Nip Alert, and it was terrible.
-不 我... -是不是 -No, I--I---Didn't you?
-喜欢它... -巴赫曼先生 -Liking it---Mr. Bachmann,
你喜欢它 对不对 you liked it, didn't you?
对 没错 我喜欢 Okay, yes, yes! Fine! Yes, I liked it,
即使它是个烂软件 毫无市场价值 Even though it was a terrible app and it had no market potential.
他拿给我看的时候我嗑嗨了 I was high when he pitched it
而且我喜欢乳头 and I like nipples--
谢谢 巴赫曼先生 Thank you, Mr. Bachmann.
它就是个傻子设计出来的问题百出 It was a buggy, rapey piece of shit
诱人强奸的烂货 designed by an idiot.
-巴赫曼先生 非常感谢 -它烂到 -Mr. Bachmann, thank you very much. -It was so bad
理查德第一次 that the first time that
在他的电脑运行这个软件时 Richard tried to boot it up on his system,
他的笔记本就当机了 拿去店里修了三天 it crashed his laptop. It was in the shop for three days.
那应用就是一坨屎 'Cause it was a piece of shit!
那个 That...
综合其他原因考虑 I mean, among other things
刚才那个并不算 that weren't that
就能说明那应用有多烂 were reasons why it was bad.
我没有问题了 法官大人 No more questions, Your Honor.
这他妈到底怎么回事 What the fuck is going on here?
我不知道刚怎么回事 他让我大脑一片空白 I don't know what happened. He got in my head.
这个失误真的很不应该 It's a very uncharacteristic error.
他们下一个要传唤你 理查德 They're calling you next, Richard.
他们让你十分钟后去作证 They want you on the stand in 10 minutes.
好极了 看来他们发现了 Great. So they figured it out.
我们全搞砸了 对吧 We're fucked, aren't we?
看来如此 It looks that way.
该死 他们会问我有没有在'互利'电脑上 Damn it, they're gonna ask me if I ran a test of Pied Piper
测试过'魔笛手' 而我只能承认 on a hooli computer, and I'm gonna have to say yes.
如果你说没测试过呢 What if you said no?
你在说什么 What are you talking about?
你是说我应该在作证时说谎吗 Are you saying I should lie on the stand or something?
先生们 这事我知道的越少越好 Gentlemen, the less I know about this, the better.
看来我们还真是找了位好帮手 Well, then it appears we're in good hands,
因为感觉你屁都不懂 because you don't seem to know shit.
你就是位刻薄又无能的上庭律师 You're a mean and terrible attorney.
我不是上庭律师 I'm not an attorney.
理查德 他们只知道 Richard, all they know
在你做那个测试时 is that you didn't have your laptop
你没法使用你的笔记本 when you ran that test,
那就告诉他们 你是借用了我的笔记本 so just tell them that you borrowed my laptop
或者你趁吃中饭时回家用了我的电脑 or you came home for lunch and used my computer.
不论你怎么说 Whatever you say,
我都会再去作证 证实你的说法 I'll get back on the stand and then back you up.
那是做伪证 That would be committing perjury.
在宣誓之后撒谎 That would be lying under oath.
如果你不撒谎 理查德 If you don't lie, Richard,
这官司你输定了 you lose.
我们会失去一切 We lose everything...
失去公司 the company,
一个有可能资产上亿公司的90%份额 90% of what could potentially be a billion dollars--
我是说 因为有10%是我的 I mean, you know, because I have 10%.
我知道 该死我当然清楚 I know. God damn it, I know.
理查德 做你该做的事 Richard, do the right thing here.
在作证时撒谎 Lie on the stand.
亨德里克斯先生 Mr. Hendricks,
你是异性恋 对吧 you are heterosexual, yes?
对 Uh, yes.
现在距你上一次与女人谈恋爱 How long has it been since you were in a relationship
有多久了 亨德里克斯先生 with a woman, Mr. Hendricks?
两年 或者三年 Two years? Three?
对 差不多有那么久 Uh, yeah, that sounds about right, I guess.
记住你发过誓 You're under oath.
比那还久 Um, longer.
所以过去三年里 So you've definitely had no girlfriend
你根本没交过女朋友 in the past three years?
不用这样揭人伤疤吧 我们都看得出来 This seems needlessly cruel. We all get it.
亨德里克斯先生 Mr. Hendricks,
在与达头蒂先生所发的邮件里 when you refer to a girlfriend
你提到的女朋友 in these emails to Mr. Bighetti,
到底是指什么 to what are you referring?
我的笔记本电脑 My laptop computer.
据刚刚巴赫曼先生所言 The same laptop
在去年4月10日到12日 that Mr. Bachman just told us
送到店里修理了三天的 was in a shop for three days
是否是同一台电脑 from April 10th to the 12th of last year?
是 我们能直入主题吗 Yes. Can we get to the point, please?
亨德里克斯先生 你是否曾经 Mr. Hendricks, did you at any time
用'互利'的电脑测试并且/或者修改过 use a Hooli computer to test and/or alter
你的'魔笛手'算法 your Pied Piper algorithm?
记住你发过誓 You're under oath.
我只是 I just--
我只是想与众不同 I just wanted to be different.
我希望'魔笛手'能与众不同 I wanted Pied Piper to be different.
但如果这公司只有通过撒谎才能存活 But if this company is built on lies,
那我们跟'互利'就没什么两样 then we're really not much different than Hooli.
根据法律规定 The law says
我会失去一切 that I lose everything--
我的整个公司 我一直为之打拼的一切 my whole company, everything that I worked for--
就因为我用了'互利'的电脑 because I used one Hooli computer
测试并修改了一个模块 to test and modify one block.
我说的对吗 Is that right?
我是说 这公平吗 I mean, is that--is that fair?
对我而言 如果整个行业认为这公平 To me, if the system says that's fair,
那我可能根本就不该入这行 then I guess I'm probably not meant to be a part of it.
亨德里克斯先生 请回答问题 Mr. Hendricks, please answer the question.
你有没有使用过'互利'的电脑 Did you at any time use a Hooli computer...
用过 对 我用过 Yes. Yeah, I did.
我犯了错 我确实用过 I made a mistake and I did.
我用'互利'的电脑 I used a Hooli computer
开发过我的算法 就那么一次 to work on my algorithm one time.
你们都听到了 And so here you go.
没事的 理查德 你不用再保护我了 It's okay, Richard. You don't have to protect me anymore.
我就是他的女朋友 I'm his girlfriend.
坐下 巴赫曼先生 Sit down, Mr. Bachman.
法官大人 我发对 我就是那个 Judge, objection! I was the one
在那三天不得不进店修理的女友 that was in the shop for those three days
因为他实在太大力了 我得去看医生 'cause he had hit it so hard, I needed a doctor.
坐下 巴赫曼先生 Sit down, Mr. Bachman.
理查德那边有消息了吗 Hey, has anyone heard from Richard?
我应该发短信问问他仲裁怎么样了吗 Should I text him to see how the Arbitration' going?
你可以问 Hey, you can.
但现在即可能进展顺利 也可能一切搞砸 But right now it's going both well and poorly.
如果你得到确切消息说他们搞砸了 And if you get definitive information back and it's bad,
我可以辩称正是因为你 I could argue that you have
导致我们输掉了仲裁 effectively caused us to lose the arbitration.
他要拆摄像头了 Oh, he's taking it down.
好了 我没装安全绳 All right, I am unclipped.
如果你在看 我很抱歉 If you're watching, I'm sorry.
我会把蛋留在这里 I'm gonna go ahead and leave this egg here.
这个摄像头必须要拆掉 This camera does need to come down.
太好了 他会把蛋留下 That's good. He's leaving the egg.
这些螺栓都生锈了 The bolts are all rusted out here.
你不该给博物馆打电话的 贾里德 You should have never called that museum, Jared.
都锈得死死的 They're on there pretty good.
我操 Holy shit.
贾里德 你刚害死了那家伙 Jared, you just killed that guy.
我刚收到了理查德的短信 I just got a text from Richard.
我不会看的 I'm not going to read it.