我是Gary Beadle so I'm Gary Beadle
今天的醉酒史讲的是 and I are being brought here to drunk history to tell you
弗莱明的故事 the story about Fleming
伊恩·弗莱明 Ian Fleming
CAO Fucking hell
伊恩·弗莱明 Ian Fleming
就是那个写书创作了詹姆斯邦德的人 who wrote a book James Bond in case they know
他很时髦 he's posh
眼前有着大好光景 and a very easy life ahead of him
没错，他去的是高等学府 he went to the posh school. there is, right
却因为遛鸟而被退学 but he gets kicked out that school for banging birds
之后他又去读了军校 so then he goes to Military Academy
又双因为嫖妓退学（传播性病） and gets kicked out for banging a prostitute
他在俱乐部里寻欢作乐 he gets the club bit happiness
这可不好办 It's a tricky situation
更糟的是 and to make things worse
他TMD飞去日内瓦学外语 he fucking flies to Geneva to learn languages
就是为了泡更多的妞 just so he can bang more birds
看到了吗？这就是奉献精神 right? that is dedication
奉献给泡妞事业 dedication to banging
1937年，他29岁 1937 he was 29 years old
这时的他吃喝嫖赌抽 he was gambling, pissed, smoking, girls
逍遥自在 just a whole, lot lifestyle
典型的弗莱明式生活 Flemming style
然后，每个单身汉都会碰到一件事 and then, the thing that happens to every single lot in the country
你遇到了一个女孩 you meet one girl
你和她紧密相连，你无法拒绝她 that you can't say no to who you've got a connection with
你摆脱不了这些 and you just can't get away with them
我相信这一点 like I can believe that
对我来说，那个人曾是夏洛特 for me, that was Charlotte
但对伊恩·弗莱明来说，那个人就是安 but I think for Ian that was Ann
他俩在派对上一拍即合 the match of that bigger fucking party whatever
我猜想他们用对了暗号 I think they play a proper symbol
说真的，你想来一杯吗？ literally, do you want to drink?
而她则会说 she would be like
"我想来一杯这个，掺奎宁水" " I want this actually,and tonic "
“你想要什么？” what do you want?
“我要来一杯马丁尼酒，不要搅拌，用摇的” I want a martini, shaken not stirred..
之后俩人都喝了点，但不多 then everybody went in a little bit deal not too much deal
他肯定不会讲自己得性病的事 he's not gonna tell us when you got the clap
更不会讲自己被退学 you got fucking kicked on the issue
所以对话内容大概会是 so I think it really like
“我离开学校后，去参军了” "I left school, I went to the military"
紧接着说 then ahead
“我来日内瓦是为了——做生意” “I went to Geneva for...business”
对安来说 to her
这些事都让她兴奋不已 that was something quite exciting
一句话里只要有这几个词： you just drop fucking Eton、
伊顿公学、军事学校、日内瓦 military school and Geneva in the same sentence
那个女孩就明白了你的出身显贵 that girl knows your born
然后她就上钩了 and that's what got hooked
她欲火中烧 she was very horny
这次没那么简单 it wasn't just like
他们并没有草草了事 trying to come back trying to come back my mind
这次可不得了 that's happen quite a possible sex
就像“把我绑起来” it was fucking tie me up
“上我” and fuck this honer
“这里那里”"这样那样" do this, do that
弗莱明心想 he thought
“嚯，看来我遇到对手了” "whooo, I've got a challenger."
就在此刻，他意识到 this is the moment he knew
他是真的喜欢她 that he really liked her
先告诉你们，他犯了个错误 this is telling you ready, he made the mistake
他告诉安自己想写书 of telling her about a book he want to write
怎么会有人在泡妞时告诉对方自己想写书？ what would you ever tell a bird you like writing book?
这恐怕是你能见过最极客的事情了 it's supposed the geekiest thing you never seen in life
她很支持，脑海里有了想法 she got a plan in her head and she was supportive
他一边嘿咻，然后她就说：“写本书吧！” he would chug, then she would like "write a book!"
嘿咻——“写本书吧！” chug, "write a book!"
嘿咻——“写本书吧！” chug, "write the book!"
这就是一切的开端 this is when it really first started
没错，圣诞节里，她把给他上了 yes yeah Christmas, yes, she was fucking the boy
而他曾经可是阅人无数的风流子弟 and this is a dude that fucking banged thorny birds
而现在，当他俩在一起时 but, now he's actually made a connection with the bird
弗莱明明显开始慌了 he's obviously gonna start on a panic
他想 he was thingking
“我喜欢她，我喜欢她的气息” "I like her, i like the breath of little fucking birds. "
或许你俩确实很般配 you may just fucking fit
但是，天涯何处无芳草？ but like, the world has got so many girls
我是说 i mean...
即使安真的很性感 Ann, cap she's fucking hot right?
但这情况很诡异对吧？ but bear with me, cause she is getting confusing, right?
安当时有一个男朋友 Ann, she's got a boyfriend
埃斯蒙德·哈姆斯沃思 Esmond Harmsworth
她甚至已经嫁给了一个老实人，奥尼尔男爵 and she's got a fucking husband, slug Baron O'Neill
（奥尼尔第三男爵） the 3rd Baron O'Neill
没有什么比这更糟了： there's nothing worse than getting introduced to
把偷情对象介绍给现任 the bird you're banging's a lot
她大概是这样介绍他的： she would introduced him as:
“这是伊恩” “this is fucking Ian”
“我们俩从小一起长大” “we grew up together”
“很聪明的男人” “very intelligent man”
弗莱明则会说 Fleming's like
“很高兴认识你。。。奥尼尔男爵？” “hello there,nice to meet you, the Baron of fucking... Co. Antrim?”
“你老婆真棒” “your wife, she's fantastic”
“她——很漂亮” “she's ... so pretty”
我想奥尼尔男爵还蒙在鼓里 I think Baron O'Neill had no idea