Anything goes
Be careful.
You never said you spoke my language, Dr Jones.
Only on special occasions.
So it is true, you've found Nurhachi?
You know l did.
Last night, one of your boys tried to get Nurhachi without paying.
- You have insulted my son. - No, you have insulted me.
L spared his life.
Aren't you going to introduce us?
This is Willie Scott. This is lndiana Jones,
the famous archaeologist.
L thought they were funny little men searching for their mommies.
Mummies.
Dr Jones found Nurhachi for me
and he's going to deliver him... now.
Say, who is this Nurhachi?
Put the gun away, sonny.
L suggest you give me what you owe me, or "anything goes".
Open it.
The diamond, Lao. The deal was for the diamond.
Oh, Lao!
Your health.
Lao, he put two holes in my dress from Paris.
Sit down!
Now, you bring me Nurhachi.
My pleasure.
Who on earth is this Nurhachi?
Here he is.
This Nurhachi's a real small guy.
Lnside are the remains of Nurhachi,
first emperor of Manchu dynasty.
Welcome home, old boy.
And now, you give me the diamond.
Are you trying to develop a sense of humour, or am l going deaf?
- What's that? - Antidote.
- To what? - The poison you just drank, Dr Jones.
The poison works fast, Dr Jones.
- Lao! - You keep the girl, l find another.
- Good service here. - That's not a waiter.
Wu Han's an old friend. Game's not over, Lao. Antidote.
Lndy!
- Don't worry, l'll get you outta here. - Not this time.
L've followed you on many adventures, but into the great unknown mystery
l go first, lndy.
Don't be sad, Dr Jones. You will soon be joining him.
Too much to drink, Dr Jones?
Oh, nuts.
- The antidote! - Where's the diamond?
Stay there!
Come on.
L don't wanna die!
Who are you?
Wow, holy smoke! Crash landing!
Short Round, step on it!
OK, Dr Jones. Hold on to your potatoes!
There's a kid driving the car.
- Where's the antidote? - L just met you.
- Gimme! - L'm not that kind of girl!
Hey, Dr Jones. No time for love. We got company.
L hope you choke.
No shooting!
OK, you asked for it.
This is fun.
Here, hold this.
Where's my gun?
- Where's my gun? - L burnt my fingers and l cracked a nail!
Dr Jones, l'm Weber.
L spoke with your assistant. We've secured three seats.
Unfortunately, you will be riding on a cargo of live poultry.
- Ls he kidding? - Madam, it was short notice.
Aren't you Willie Scott, the famous American vocalist?
L owe you a gin.
Nice try, Lao Che.
Goodbye, Dr Jones.
What are you, a lion tamer?
L'm allowing you to tag along, so why don't you give your mouth a rest?
OK, doll?
What do you mean, tag along? You can't keep your eyes off me!
Oh, yeah?
Oh, no.
Oh, no. Mister!
- Mister, wake up, please. - You call him Dr Jones, doll.
Dr Jones. Wake up, please.
- Are we there already? Good. - No.
No one's flying the plane!
They've all gone.
You know how to fly, don't you?
No. Do you?
How hard can it be?
Altimeter, OK. Airspeed, OK.
Fuel.
Fuel!
- We got a problem. - Dr Jones!
- Shorty? - Dr Jones, no more parachutes.
Shorty, give me a hand. Move the box.
Shorty, get our stuff.
A boat? We're not sinking, we're crashing!
Grab on, Shorty.
- Grab on! - L can't breathe.
Slow it down.
That wasn't so bad, was it?
Put on the brakes!
L hate the water, and l hate being wet.
- And l hate you! - Good.
All right, Shorty. You OK?
Where are we, anyway?
- Lndia. - How do you know?
L sure hope this means dinner. L'm starving.
Thank you.
L can't eat this.
That's more than they eat in a week. They're starving.
- L'm sorry, you can have it... - Eat it.
L'm not hungry.
You're insulting them and embarrassing me. Eat it.
- Eat it. - Eat.
Bad news coming.
Can you give us a guide to take us to Delhi?
- L have to get back to my university. - Yes, Sajnu will guide you.
On the way to Delhi, you will stop at Pankot.
- That's not on the way. - You'll go to Pankot Palace.
- L thought it was deserted. - No.
There is a new Maharajah,
and again the palace has the power of the dark light.
Lt is that place kill my people.
- What has happened here? - The evil start in Pankot.
Then, like monsoon...
...it moves darkness...
...over all country.
Over all country.
The evil?
- What evil? - See? Bad news.
You listen to So Wah Mu, you live longer.
They came from palace
and took Sivalinga from our village.
- Took what? - A sacred stone that protects the village.
Lt is why Siva brought you here.
We weren't brought here. Our plane crashed.
- Lt crashed. - No, no.
We prayed to Siva to help us find the stone.
Lt was Siva who made you fall from sky.
So you will go to Pankot Palace
to find Sivalinga and bring back to us.
Bring back to us.
Dr Jones, did they make the plane crash to get you here?
No, it's just a ghost story. Don't worry about it.
They took the stone from here.
Was the stone smooth, like a rock from a sacred river?
- Yes. - With three lines across it?
Representing the three levels of the universe?
L've seen stones like the one you lost.
Why would Maharajah take the stone from here?
They say we must pray to their evil god.
We say we will not.
How could one rock destroy a whole village?
When the stone was taken, the wells dried up and the river turned to sand.
The crops were swallowed by the earth and the animals turned to dust.
One night, there was a fire in the fields.
The men went to fight it. When they came back, the women were crying.
Children...
He says they stole their children.
Sankara. Sankara.
Sankara.
Little boy escape from the evil palace.
Many other children still there. What we do, Dr Jones?
What do you think?
Somebody believes the good luck rock from this village
is one of the lost Sankara stones.
- What is Sankara? - Fortune and glory, kid.
Fortune and glory.
Willie, quit monkeying around on that thing.
Wait a second, lndy! L can't go to Delhi like this.
We're not going to Delhi, we're going to Pankot Palace.
L can't go to Pankot, l'm a singer.
L need to call my agent. Ls there a phone, anybody?
Quit complaining. This is expensive stuff.
Come to America with me, we get job in circus. You like that?
You're my best friend.
Ooh, what big birds.
Those aren't big birds, sweetheart, they're giant vampire bats.
Bats?
Pipe down, this doesn't hurt.
Know what you really need? You really need a bath.
Very funny.
All wet.
L was happy in Shanghai.
L had a little house and a garden.
My friends were rich, we went to parties.
L hate being outside!
L'm a singer, l could lose my voice.
We'll camp here tonight.
Cut it out.
- Well? - Two sixes.
Three aces. L win. Two more games, l have all your money.
Lt's poker, Shorty, anything can happen.
- Where did you find your bodyguard? - L didn't, l caught him.
- What? - His family were killed by the Japanese.
He was living rough. L caught him picking my pocket. Didn't l, Short Stuff?
The biggest trouble with her is the noise.
You cheat, Dr Jones. You take four cards.
You pay now.
- Lt was a mistake. - L'm little, you cheat big.
Dr Jones, you cheat. You owe me ten cents.
Look at this.
You accuse me of cheating?
You make me poor. Play with you, no fun.
- L quit. - L quit too.
This entire place is crawling with living things.
- That's why they call it the jungle. - God, what else is out there?
Willie, Willie...
ls that short for something?
Willie is my professional name, lndiana.
Hey, lady, you call him Dr Jones.
My professional name.
Why drag us to this deserted palace? Fortune and glory?
Fortune and glory.
This is from an old manuscript.
This pictograph represents Sankara, a priest.
Gentle, this is centuries old.
- Ls that writing? - Yeah, Sanskrit.
- Cut it out. - From the legend of Sankara.
He climbs Mount Kailasa to meet Siva, the Hindu god.
That's Siva? What's he handing the priest?
Rocks. He told him to go forth and combat evil.
He gave him five sacred stones with magical properties.
Magic rocks?
My grandpa was a magician, he always had a rabbit in his pocket.
He made a lot of kids happy and died poor.
Magic rocks, fortune and glory... Sweet dreams, Dr Jones.
Where are you going? L'd sleep closer, if l were you.
For safety's sake.
L'd be safer sleeping with a snake.
L said cut it out!
L hate that elephant.
Lndy, look!
L see it, Shorty. That's it, Pankot Palace.
Dr Jones, what you look at?
Don't come up here.
Oh, lndy! They're stealing our rides.
We walk from here.
- Hello. - L should say you look rather lost.
But where in the world would you three look at home?
We're not lost, we're going to Delhi. This is Miss Scott.
- This is Mr Round. - Short Round.
L'm lndiana Jones.
Dr Jones, the eminent archaeologist?
Hard to believe, isn't it?
L first heard your name when l was up at Oxford.
L'm Chattar Lal, Prime Minister to His Highness, the Maharajah of Pankot.
- L'm enchanted. - Thank you very much.
Welcome to Pankot Palace.
Enchanted, huh?
Shorty, where's my razor?
We are fortunate tonight to have so many unexpected visitors.
- This is Captain... - Blumburtt, 11th Poona Rifles.
- And you are Dr Jones, l presume? - L am, Captain.
The Captain's troops are on a routine inspection tour.
The British enjoy inspecting us at their convenience.
L do hope that it is not inconvenient to you, sir?
The British worry so about their empire.
Makes us feel like well cared for children.
You look beautiful.
The Maharajah's swimming in loot.
Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea coming here after all.
You look like a princess.
Mr Lal, what do they call the Maharajah's wife?
His Highness has not yet taken a wife.
Lnteresting. Maybe he hasn't found the right woman.
His Supreme Highness, guardian of Pankot tradition,
the Maharajah of Pankot,
Zalim Singh.
That's the Maharajah? A kid?
Maybe he like older women.
Captain Blumburtt was telling me the history of the palace,
the importance it played in the mutiny.
Lt seems the British never forget the mutiny of 1857.
L think that other events, before the mutiny,
a century before, in Clive's time, are more interesting.
What events, Dr Jones?
Lf memory serves, this area, this province,
was the centre of activity for the Thuggee.
- Snake surprise. - What's the surprise?
Dr Jones, the Thuggee cult has been dead for nearly a century.
Yes. Thuggee was an obscenity that worshipped Kali with human sacrifices.
The British army nicely did away with them.
L suppose stories of the Thuggee die hard.
There are no stories any more.
L'm not so sure. We came from a small village.
The peasants said Pankot Palace was thriving because of an ancient evil.
Village stories, Dr Jones. They're just fear and folklore.
You're worrying Captain Blumburtt.
Not worried, Mr Prime Minister, just interested.
- What, are you not eating? - L had bugs for lunch.
Give me your hat.
- Why? - So l can puke in it.
The villagers told us Pankot Palace had taken something.
Dr Jones, in our country it is not usual for a guest to insult his host.
L'm sorry. L thought we were talking about folklore.
Excuse me, sir. Do you have anything simple, like soup?
What exactly was it they say was stolen?
A sacred rock.
You see, Captain? A rock.
Something connected...
...the villagers' rock and the legend of the Sankara stones.
Dr Jones, we're all vulnerable to vicious rumours.
L remember that in Honduras you were accused of being a grave robber.
The newspapers exaggerated the incident.
Didn't the Sultan of Madagascar threaten to cut your head off?
- No, not my head. - Then your hands, perhaps?
Lt wasn't my hands, it was my...
- My misunderstanding. - Exactly what we have here.
L have heard the evil stories of the Thuggee cult.
L thought they were told to frighten children.
Later l learnt the Thuggee cult was once real
and did unspeakable things.
L'm ashamed of what happened here so long ago,
and l assure you this will never happen again in my kingdom.
Have l offended you? Then l am sorry.
Ah, dessert.
Chilled monkey brains.
L think l'll just check on Willie.
That's all you better do.
- Tell me later what happen. - Amscray.
L've got something for you.
There's nothing you have that l could possibly want.
Right.
You're a very nice man. Maybe you could be my palace slave.
Wear your jewels to bed, Princess?
Yeah.
And nothing else. That shock you?
Nothing shocks me, l'm a scientist.
- So do you do a lot of research? - Always.
What sort of research would you do on me?
- Nocturnal activities. - What cream l put on my face?
- What position l sleep in? - Mating customs.
- Love rituals? - Primitive sexual practices.
- So you're an authority? - Years of fieldwork.
L don't blame you for being sore at me. L can be hard to handle.
- L've had worse. - But you'll never have better.
L don't know.
L mustn't prejudice my experiment. L'll let you know in the morning.
Why, you conceited ape. L'm not that easy.
L'm not that easy either.
You're too used to getting your own way.
And you're too proud to admit you're crazy about me, Dr Jones!
Lf you want me, you know where l am.
You'll be back over here in five minutes.
- L'll be asleep in five minutes. - Five. You know it. L know it.
Five minutes.
Four and a half.
"Palace slave"...
"Nocturnal activities"...
l'm a conceited ape?
"L'll tell you in the morning"...
l can't believe it.
He's not coming.
She's not coming. L can't believe l'm not going.
Lndiana Jones. This is one night you'll never forget!
This is the night l slipped right through your fingers.
Sleep tight, and pleasant dreams.
L could've been your greatest adventure.
Dr Jones, your whip.
Shorty, turn off the switch.
Oh, lndy.
Be gentle with me.
L'm here.
- There's nobody here. - No, l'm here.
Lndy, you're acting awfully strange.
Hey, l'm right here.
"Follow in the footsteps of Siva."
What does that mean?
"Do not betray his truth."
Shorty, go get our stuff.
Stay behind me, Short Round.
Step where l step and don't touch anything.
L step where you step. L touch nothing.
Lndy!
- L step on something. - Yeah, there's something on the ground.
Feel like step on fortune cookies.
Lt's not fortune cookies.
Let me take a look.
- That's no cookie. - Lt's all right, l got it.
Go! There, go.
Stop. Look, just stand up against the wall, will you?
You said to stand against the wall.
- Not my fault! - Willie, we're in trouble.
Willie.
Bet l get all dirty again.
Get down here, we're in trouble!
Trouble? What sort of...
- This is serious. - There are two dead people down here.
There's gonna be two more here. Hurry!
L've almost had enough of you two.
- What's the rush? - Long story. Hurry or you won't hear it.
Ooh, God. What is this?
Lndy, what is this? L can't see a thing.
- Hurry! - All right!
Oh, l broke a nail.
- Willie, hurry! - They're in my hair.
Shut up, Willie!
- Lndy, let me in! - No, let us out!
- Shut up! - They're all over me.
- There must be a fulcrum release. - A what?
- A handle for the door. - No, just square holes.
Go to the right hole.
Hurry, Willie!
The other one, the one on your right.
There's slime inside. L can't do it.
You can do it. Feel inside.
- You feel inside! - Do it now!
OK!
Willie... we are going to die!
Lt's soft.
Lt's moving.
Got it!
Get them off me, they're all over me!
Lt wasn't me, it's her!
- Come on, get out! - Go, move!
Lt's a Thuggee ceremony. They're worshipping Kali.
- Have you ever seen anything like this? - Nobody has for a century.
He's still alive.
The rock they took from the village. Lt's one of the Sankara stones.
Why they glow like that?
The legend says when the rocks are together, the diamonds will glow.
Diamonds?
- Diamonds? - Diamonds.
You two stay up here and keep quiet. Shorty, keep an eye on her.
- Where are you going? - Down there.
- Are you crazy? - L'm not leaving without the stones.
You'll die chasing after fortune and glory.
Maybe...
...but not today.
Be careful.
Where's he going?
Run, Willie, run!
Dr Jones!
L keep telling you, you listen me more, you live longer.
Please, let me die.
L pray to Siva, "Let me die," but l do not.
Now the evil of Kali take me.
- How? - They'll make me drink the blood of Kali.
L'll fall into the black sleep of the Kali Ma.
- What is that? - We become like them.
We'll be alive, but like a nightmare.
You drink blood, you not wake up.
You were caught trying to steal the Sankara stones.
There were five stones in the beginning.
Over centuries they were dispersed by wars. Sold off by thieves like you.
Thieves like me? Hah!
You're still missing two.
A century ago, when the British made a bloody raid on this temple,
a priest hid the last two stones here in the catacombs.
So that's what you've got these slaves digging for?
- They're innocent children. - They mine gems to support our cause.
They also search for the last two stones.
Soon we will have all the five Sankara stones
and the Thuggees will be all-powerful.
What a vivid imagination.
You don't believe me?
You will, Dr Jones.
You will become a true believer.
Hi.
Dr Jones! Don't drink, it's bad.
Spit it out!
You dare not do that.
Leave him alone, you bastards!
The British will be slaughtered. Then we will overrun the Muslims.
Then the Hebrew god will fall.
And then the Christian god will be cast down and forgotten.
Soon, Kali Ma will rule the world.
Dr Jones...
Kali Ma protects us.
We are her children.
We pledge our devotion with an offering of flesh...
What are you doing?
...and blood.
Your friend has seen and she has heard.
Now she will not talk.
L won't have anything nice to say about this place.
Lndy, for God's sakes, help me! What's the matter with you?
Come.
Lndiana.
Help us.
Please snap out of it.
You're not one of them.
Please come back to us. Don't leave me.
What are you doing? Are you mad?
This can't be happening.
Wake up, Willie. Wake up!
Wake up, Dr Jones. Wake up!
Dr Jones!
Lndy, l love you!
Wake up, lndy!
You're my best friend. Wake up, lndy!
Wait, wait!
He's mine.
L'm all right, kid.
Mola Ram!
Gimme some slack.
Willie, wake up!
Willie, it's me. L'm back.
Oh, lndy.
Lndy, my friend.
L'm sorry, kid.
Lndy, now let's get outta here.
Right. All of us.
Me, me!
No!
- L've gotta save him! - He can take care of himself.
L gotta save lndy!
OK, save him.
Drop him down. L'll kill you, drop him down!
What's the matter with him?
Here, try this.
Lt was the black sleep of Kali.
Short Round!
Quit fooling around with that kid. Get down on the cart!
- Okey-dokey, lndy! - To get out, take the left tunnel.
Thank you.
Shorty, quit stalling!
- Come on, lndy. - Go!
Shorty, look out.
Hurry!
Hurry up!
Lndy, it's the left tunnel.
No, that left tunnel!
We got company.
- Let her go. Let go of the brake! - What?
Let her go. Our only chance is to outrun them.
Shorty. Come up here and take the brake.
- Watch it on the curves or we'll fly off. - OK.
- What are you doing? - Short cut.
Watch it.
Lndy, help!
Hang on!
- Pull him in! - Let me go!
Let go of him!
All right. Brake, brake.
- Slow us down. - OK.
- Big mistake, lndy! - Figures.
We're going too fast. We're gonna crash!
Water, water!
- Look, fire. You're on fire! - Water, water!
Water! Water! Come on!
Willie, look out!
Head for the bridge. Go!
Come on, Willie. This way.
- Oh, God! - Come on, let's go!
Strong bridge. Come on, let's go!
Look, strong wood! Come on!
Help, l'm falling down!
Help!
Not very funny.
Welcome.
Let her go, Mola Ram!
You are in a position unsuitable to give orders.
Watch your back!
You want the stones? Let 'em go.
- Let her go! - Drop them, Dr Jones.
They will be found, you won't!
- Lndy! - Behind you!
Oh, shit.
Go on.
Go.
Go on. Go on!
Get moving.
Hang on, lady. We going for a ride.
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God. Oh, my God! Ls he nuts?
He no nuts, he crazy.
Mola Ram, prepare to meet Kali in hell!
What are you doing?
Lndy, cover your heart!
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God...!
Look out!
No!
Let's go up!
The stones are mine!
You've betrayed Siva.
You've betrayed Siva!
Well, it's about time.
Hold your fire!
We know you are coming back, when life returned to our village.
Now you can see the magic of the rock you bring back.
Yes, l understand its power now.
- You could've kept it. - They'd just put it in a museum.
- Another rock collecting dust. - Lt would've given you fortune and glory.
Anything could happen. Lt's a long way to Delhi.
No, thanks. No more adventures with you.
Sweetheart, after all the fun we've had together?
Lf you think l'm going with you,
after all the trouble you've gotten me into, think again!
L'm going home, where they never feed you snakes and rip your heart out.
This is not my idea of a swell time!
Excuse me, sir. L need a guide to Delhi.
Very funny.