你觉得这套怎么样？ 过于可爱？
What do you think of this? Too cute?
一点也没有
Oh. not at all.
但我担心那些 被你偷去衣服的法国海盗们……
I just-- I worry that the ragtag group of French pirates you stole it from...
……会把咱们家炮轰成筛子
are gonna riddle our home with cannon fire.
Will 你知道那句老话吗？ 不要五十步笑百
Will. don't you know the old adage? Guys who wore jellies shouldn't throw stones.
（直译：自己都胖到不行就别落井下石别人了）
命中要害
Touche
- 你跟谁出去逛？ - 就一个男的
- So who are you goin' out with? - Uh. just a guy.
谁？
Who?
别过来 我要换衣服了
Stay there. I want to change my shirt.
嗨 Will 我是Jack 听着 两件事 很重要 我……
Hi. Will. it's Jack. Listen. two things. very important. I got--
嗨 又是我 我……
Hi. it's me again. I--
还有一件事 你绝对不敢信谁给我……
And one more thing. you're never gonna believe who gave me--
Grace 嘿 我是 Danny 就确认一下今晚的行程 没有变数的话 我就8点来接你
Grace. hey. it's Danny. Just confirming tonight. If I don't hear from you. I'll pick you up at 8:00.
好了 这件最好行得通 因为除了这件我只剩一件桃色伴娘连衣裙了
Okay. this better work. 'cause it's either this or the peach bridesmaid's dress.
所以你不打算告诉我 这男的是谁喽？
So you're not gonna tell me who this guy is?
- 是谁不重要啊 - 拜托了 我只是好奇 是相亲对象？
- It's really no big deal. - No. come on.I'm just curious. I mean. is it a blind date.
或者是一个新客户 或者是……
or a new client or...
你浪费了两年光阴在一起的 直到你终于清醒 并半路逃婚的前夫？
your ex-fianc? who you wasted two years of your life with until you finally came to your senses and left him at the altar.
还是其他人？
or what?
Grace 你为什么要这样？
Grace. why are you doing this?
为什么我们不来点新花样？ 为什么我们不试着让我主宰一次我自己的人生？
Why don't we try something new? Why don't we experiment with letting me run my life?
你什么意思？
What is that supposed to mean?
就是之前有时候 最近更加频繁 你有种倾向、习惯、冲动去掌控我的生活
Oh. it's just that sometimes. Iately. all the time. you have a tendency. habit. compulsion to run my life.
那请原谅我的一片好心 因为我总是擦屁股的那个人
Well. excuse me for caring.It's just that I'm the one who always has to clean up the mess.
我就像马戏团里那个跟在大象屁股后面 拎着桶捡粑粑的小男人
I'm like the little guy in the circus who has to follow the elephant around with the bucket.
- 这是个什么破比喻啊 - 你知道我的意思
- That is a horrible analogy. - You know what I'm saying.
没人请帮忙 Will
Nobody asked for your help. Will.
是啊 大中午的 把我拉回公寓 只为帮你挑件衣服的女人有资格说这话？
Yeah. said the girl who dragged me home for clothing advice-- at noon!
- 要是我就不会搭配这个围巾 - 你是对的
- No. I wouldn't go with that scarf. - Oh. you're right.
- 别管闲事！ - 行 行 如你所愿 单飞吧
- So just stay out of this! - Fine. fine.All you had to do was ask. Fly solo!
- 我谢谢你了 如我所愿 单飞了！ - 很好
- Thank you. that's what I prefer. to fly solo! - Good!
- 但在此之前 不如换条裤子吧 - 我听到了
- Before you do. I would rethink those pants.- I heard that.
翻译：艾姆·希尔瑞思 微博 & B站：艾姆-希尔瑞思 字幕制作日期：2021年9月
今晚要共进晚餐吗？
So you want to have dinner tonight?
等一下 发生了什么？
Wait a minute. what-- what's going on here?
我喜欢你
I like you.
什么时候的事？
Since when?
一直以来啊
Always.
我不知道你在耍什么把戏
I don't like where this is going.
怎么了？ 我只希望你陪陪我
What? I want your company.
好吧 Grace 约会去了
Okay. Grace has a date.
跟 Danny 约会 你敢信吗
With Danny. if you can believe that.
我天 跟‘鹧鸪家族’里的 Danny Bonaduce？
Oh my God. Danny Bonaduce of the Partridge family?
不是 不过你真会猜啊
Uh. no. Good guess. though.
等一下 Danny Danny Danny Danny
Wait a minute. Danny. Danny. Danny. Danny?
前夫 Danny?
As in ex-Danny?
所以你忍了多久 才告诉她这是个坏主意？
So how long did you wait before you told her it was a bad idea?
你把她的头咬掉 然后吸她的骨髓了吗？
Did you bite her head off and get to the creamy center? Rrrrr
说出我的观点有什么错呢
There is nothing wrong with sharing an opinion.
Will 你做的那事 叫‘多管闲事’
There is when you do it. Will. It's called meddling.
- 而且我们几个都快受不了了 - 你……
- And some of us are sick of it. - What are you--
- 大家都嚼什么舌根？ 我没多管闲事 - 是吗？
- What is everybody talking about? I don't meddle. - Oh. no?
让我们用‘多管闲事探测器’ 给 Will 测一测好吗？
Let's put Will through the meddle detector. shall we?
‘Jack 他已经有对象了’ ‘Jack 他是个牧师’
"Jack. he's already in a relationship." "Jack. he's a member of the clergy."
‘Jack 你确定你想跟渣男约会吗？’
"Jack. are you sure you want to date someone with three strikes?"
渣男也是需要爱的 你懂我的意思吗？
Naughty boys need love. too. You know what I'm sayin'?
- Will Karen 和 Rosario 来了 - 让她们进来吧
- Will. Karen and Rosario are here. - Send them in.
她带着她的女仆来了？ Jack 很好奇
She's here with her maid? Jack's intrigued.
Jack 该走了 再见
Jack's leaving. Buh-bye.
拜托 让我留下吧 我和 Karen 是一对
Oh. come on. Iet me stay. Karen and I are lovers.
- Karen 进来吧 - 嗨 小奶狗 - 再见 小奶狗
- Karen. come on in. - Oh. hi. poodle. - Bye. poodle.
- 拿去 自己买点午餐吃吧 - 好的 保持联系 我想知道……
- Here. go buy yourself some lunch. - Okay. keep me posted. I want to know if Ros--
- Will 这位是 Rosario - 很高兴见到你
- Will. this is Rosario. - It's nice to meet you.
来吧
Okay. come on. honey.
坐——下 （模仿西语口音）
Sit-o down-o.
尽量别说话
Try not to talk-o.
你看到她是怎么跟我说话的吗？
You hear how she talks to me?
我会说英语 好吗！
I speak English. okay?
是啊 一到工作时间就不会了
Oh. yeah. Except when it's time to work.
你就说‘不会英语’
Then it's all. "No hablo ingles."
我像狗一样地工作 你和 Stan 先生脏得跟猪一样我也没办法
I work like a dog.It's not my fault that you and Mr. Stan are pigs.
他们是脏猪
They're pigs.
- 汪！汪！汪！ - 汪！汪！汪！
……
我好担心啊 Will 我不能失去 Rosario
I'm nervous. Will. I can't live without Rosario.
拜托 帮帮我吧
Please. you've got to help me out.
- 或许离开她对你来说是好事 - 你怎么敢说这种话 她可是……
- Maybe you're better off without her. - How can you say that. honey?She's been with me for...
我是在跟 Rosario 说这话呢
I'm talking to Rosario.
你怎么能这么说 Karen 夫人呢？ 我爱 Karen 夫人
Why do you say that about Miss Karen? I love Miss Karen.
我以为我跟你说过 别穿这套了
I thought we talked about that suit.
- 汪！汪！汪！ - 汪！汪！汪！
……
今夜上演 ‘肤浅的贵妇们和虐她们的女仆们’
Tonight on Springer."Shallow Societies and The Maids Who Abuse Them."
听着 我们可以申请美国公民身份
Look. um. we can apply for citizenship
或者申请一个短期的工作签证
or get a temporary work visa.
但你也知道的 这些手续都要花些时间的
but. you know. these things take time.
除了跟美国人结婚 我认为没有其他更快的方法了
Short of marrying someone. I don't see any quick solution.
那么该如何做才能实现呢？
Well. how would that work? I mean. just for argument's sake.
她需要结婚 但是她的丈夫必须是未婚的美国公民
Well. she would get married.But. her groom to be would have to be a US citizen with no ties.
他需要有大把的闲时间 且不会假戏真做的那种
Someone who's available. but. you know. not looking for a romantic entanglement.
嘿 小伙伴们 看呀
Hey. guys. Iook.
我是 Will 之前的男朋友
I'm Will's last boyfriend.
（指第20集的Nate）
...
怎么了？
What?
难道你不想知道昨晚 我和 Danny 约会都发生了什么吗？
Don't you want to hear about my date last night with Danny?
关我屁事 吃奶油芝士吗？
None of my business. Schmear?
- 一会吃 - 随你便
- Schmaybe later. - Schmoot yourself.
总之 可真是太有意思了
Anyway. it was-- it was really interesting.
真是士别三日 当刮目相待啊
What a change since the last time I saw him.
他看起来很棒 他更乐观了 他更专注了……
He looks great. he's happier. he's more focused--
他就在这儿 惊喜吧 嗨 Danny
And he's here! How about that? Hi. Danny.
（该演员 Tom Verica 之后出演了大热剧‘逍遥法外’里女主的丈夫 Sam Keating）
早安
'Morning.
嘿 兄弟
Hey. dude.
嘿 Danny 最近怎么样啊？
Hey. Danny. How you doin'?
不错 我很好 那你呢？ 你还是喜欢男人吗？
All right. I'm all right. How about you? You uh. you know. you still into guys and all that?
是啊 恐怕是这样的 看来那些抗生素没起什么效
Yeah. I'm afraid so.The antibiotics just didn't seem to work.
在你开口之前 先听我跟你说说 Danny 好吗？
Before you say anything. Iet me just tell you something about Danny. okay?
他真的是脱胎换骨了 人是会变的 Will 而且 Danny 已经焕然一新了
He's completely different. People do change. Will. and Danny has changed.
事实上 他现在就焕然‘衣’新呢
In fact. he's changing right now.
谢谢捧场 我这一周都在
Thank you. I'll be here all week.
讲真的 Will 他真的成长了
No. seriously. Will. he really has grown.
好吧
Okay.
好吧？
Okay?
好吧
Okay.
好吧 好吧
Okay. Okay.
你不如直接给 我肚子来上一拳算了？
Why don't you just punch me in the stomach?
你就是控制不住你自己 对不对？ ‘好吧’
Wow. you can't hold back. can you? "Okay."
Grace 我说的‘好吧’ 表示你觉得怎么好就怎么来吧
Grace. I mean okay. You know. whatever you think best.
那你可真是冷漠啊
Now you're just being cruel.
我知道你是怎么想的
I know what you're thinking.
你在想我会像傻逼一样 再续不会有结果的前缘
You're thinking that I'm an idiot for going back into a relationship that didn't work.
首先 你凭什么骂我‘傻逼’？
Well. first of all. how dare you call me an idiot?!
其次 你有没有想过借此机会我们分居
And second of all. did it ever occur to you that maybe we needed this time apart
去搞清楚我们是否珍重彼此？ 你有没有想过这种事？
to figure out how important we were to each other? Did that ever cross your mind. huh?
好吧 行吧 你说的有理
Okay. fine. You raise a valid point.
人们真的会脱胎换骨吗？
Do people really change
或者他们还是像 从前那样地痴迷足球
or are they the same football-watching.
送牛排刀当礼物
steak-knife-giving.
像兄弟会成员那样 说‘我得闪人了’
I-gotta-blow-outta-here frat boy they always were?
Grace 我只是说了句‘啊’
Grace. I just said. "Ah."
但很明显 你的那声‘啊’表示的是‘好吧’ 我想我们都心知肚明那是什么意思
Yeah. but clearly. by. "Ah." you meant. "Okay." And I think we all know now what that means.
什么意思啊？！
What does it mean?!
- 告诉我 - Grace 你干嘛
- Tell me. - Grace-- excuse me.
昨天你亲口告诉我 让我别多管闲事
But yesterday you told me that-- that you wanted me to mind my own business.
那为什么你还想知道 我是怎么想的？
Why do you now want to know what I think?
因为…… 我在考验你
Because... I was testing you.
但很幸运 你通过考验了
And luckily. you passed.
因为要是你真的对这纠结的事发表看法 我肯定会生气 因为我不需要你的看法
Because if you had given me your opinion on this very confusing issue. I really would have been mad.because I don't need it.
我可以自我做决断 好吗
I can make my own decisions for myself. okay?
我得闪人了
You know what? I gotta blow outta here.
不如我送你出门吧？
Why don't I walk you to the door?
好啊 Will 你介意我拿一块贝果面包吗？
Yeah. Will. you mind if I grab a bagel? Just--
- 你自便 - 你可真行啊
- Whatever you think is best. - Oh. you're good.
听着 Gracie 这真是……
So. Iisten. Gracie. it was uh...
很开心能再次见到你
it was great seeing you again.
不如这周末再约一次吧？
What about maybe going away this weekend?
你知道吗？ 算了吧 算了吧
You know what? Never mind. Never mind.
我都忘了跟 Grace 谈恋爱 就是同时跟 Will 和 Grace 谈恋爱
I forgot that to have a relationship with Grace is to have a relationship with Will and Grace.
永远都是三人行 还是很糟的那一种
It was always a threesome-- and not the good kind.
再联系吧
I'll talk to you later.
说来也好笑 我曾总是幻想自己是‘十二月新娘’
You know. it's funny. I always imagined myself a December bride.
（十二月新娘 在俚语里还表示‘被男人射了一身的女人’）
但是为了一千美元而临时 跟一个非法移民结婚 也别有一番乐趣
But there is something about a last-minute marriage to an illegal alien for $1000 that has a romance all its own.
Karen 夫人 我需要一套新婚纱
Miss Karen. I need a new dress.
我穿这个都不能呼吸了
I can't breathe in this.
亲爱的 明明昨天还合身
Honey. it fit yesterday.
直到冻火鸡神秘消失之前
before the frozen turkey mysteriously disappeared.
- 汪！汪！汪！ - 汪！汪！汪！
……
Jack 宝贝 照顾好我的天使
Jack. honey. take good care of my angel.
度蜜月的时候 我觉得我会带上 Dan 而不带 Doug
For the honeymoon. I think I'm gonna bring Dan instead of Doug.
Rosario 你会带上谁？
Rosario. who are you gonna bring?
噢 Jack 看看你啊
Oh. Jack. Look at you.
你还是我亲手带大的小女孩吗？
Is this the little girl I carried?
好了 我带来了一些文件 你们俩需要 在去见移民官之前熟悉一下
Okay. I've drawn up your papers.I need you both to review them before your meeting with the immigration people.
说到了这儿了 突击提问 Jack Rosario 睡的床有多大？
Speaking of which. pop quiz: Jack. what side of the bed does Rosario sleep on?
她睡在菜棚的吊床上 我他妈怎么会知道？
She sleeps in a hammock on the sun porch. How the hell should I know?
因为你要是不知道的话 她就会被驱逐
Because if you don't know. she's gonna be deported.
- Rosario Jack 在什么地方工作？ - 他是‘指路明灯’的演员
- Rosario. where does Jack work? - He's on "The Guiding Light."
嘿 我给他们寄了‘Jack 独秀’的录像带了 被录用是早晚的事
Hey. I sent them a tape of "Just Jack." It's just a matter of time.
‘Jack 独秀’ （她在说西语）
"Solamente Jack."
- 谢谢 - 好了 Jack
- Gracias. - Okay. Jack.
严肃点好吗？
this is serious. okay?
这次不像上次你为了拿到犹太教教士的电话号码 而假装你是犹太人那么简单
This is not like the time you pretended to be Jewish so you could get that rabbi's phone number.
多么糟糕的选择啊 那个男的周五晚上都不能出门
Aw. what a mistake.A guy who can't go out on a Friday night.
（犹太教有安息日 从周五日落到周六日落不能乱走）
宝贝 拿着我的信用卡
Honey. here's my credit card.
带着你的新娘去吃午餐吧 顺便熟悉下日常细节
Take your bride to lunch and pump her for some intimate details.
好了 走吧 老婆
Okay. come on. wifey.
我们去‘男孩酒吧’ 嗨一下 要是有人问起的话
It's happy hour at Boybar. and if anybody asks.
你就说你是变装皇后
you're a drag queen.
只要能有鸡翅吃 我就没所谓了
As long as they have chicken wings. I'm fine.
Grace 去哪了？ 我快一周没见到她了
So. where's Grace? I haven't seen her all week.
我也不清楚 做些工作相关的事吧
Mmm. I don't know. Somethin' about work.
我试图让自己置身事外
I try not to get involved.
宝贝 干什么呢？ 发生了什么？ 怎么回事?
Honey. what's this? What's happening? What's going on?
没什么
Nothing.
你在闻她的铅笔呢
You're smelling her pencils.
我就是想确认这些铅笔还没变质
I just wanted to make sure they're fresh.
行了 你留着笑话发网上吧 我很忙的
All right. save it for the laugh shack. honey. I'm busy.
Jack 希望搞一只猴子来做递戒指的人
Jack wants a monkey as the ring bearer.
再见……
See you at--
不行 我很抱歉 整个……
no. I'm sorry. it's this whole--
整个 Grace 和 Danny 复合的事 明眼人都能看出来是个‘巨大的错误’
it's this whole Grace and Danny thing. Does this not have "gigantic mistake" written all over it?
- 我不想多管闲事的…… - 宝贝 宝贝 宝贝
- I don't want to be a meddler-- - Honey. honey. honey...
我感觉到你能哔哔好长一段时间 所以我直接把各种废话总结成两个关键点 好吗？
I sense this is gonna go on for quite a while. so let me just boil all this hoo-ha down to two important points. okay?
第一点 灰棕色不流行了
One. brown is over.
第二点 你该为自己活了
And two. you need to get a life.
- 你不懂…… - 为自己活
- You don't understand-- - Get a life.
- 但是我是 Grace 的…… - 活着！
- But I'm Grace's-- - Life!
好了 你的事解决 真棒
All right. honey. You're done. That's good.
噢 我没看见你 这可真有趣啊
Oh. I don't see you. This is so fun.
这太蠢了
This is so stupid.
我看起来像个 pinata
I look like a pinata.
（pinata 用彩纸做成的小马 里面装满糖果 大家蒙上眼睛 试图用棒子打碎它 被打碎的pinata 会散落一地的糖 我一直以为这东西是墨西哥人发明的 结果这东西起源于中国）
是啊 要是我拿着棒子打你话 我就能看到我钱散落一地
Yeah. and if I beat you with a stick. I could watch all my money fall out.
你最好对我 有点感激之情好吗？
Now. how about a little appreciation for all of this?
我只想要一个绿卡罢了 而不是一个结束后我还需要打扫的派对
All I want is my green card. not a party I have to clean up after.
要不是我为你做了这一切 你就该坐着鸡飞狗跳的'鳄梨酱航班' 飞回你老家去了
If it wasn't for this. you'd be flying back to Cucaracha on "Air Guacamole" with live chickens runnin' up and down the aisle!
听着 夫人 我能像折树枝一样折断你 然后把你丢到灌木丛里去
Listen. Iady. I'm gonna snap you like a twig and throw you in a bush.
好啊 我倒想看看你有什么本事
Yeah. I'd like to see you try.
- 汪！汪！汪！ - 汪！汪！汪！
……
我天 我家小闺女要结婚了
Oh my God. my little girl is getting married.
嗨 很高兴见到你 感谢到来
Hi. so nice to see you. Thanks for coming.
噢 你剪头发了 看起来很棒
Oh. you cut your hair. It looks great.
你家孩子怎么样啊？
Hi. how's the baby?
噢 看来某人该少吃点意大利面了 哈？
Oh. somebody better lighten up on the fusilli there. huh?
这儿的人我一个都不认识 看不出来吧？
I don't know a person here. How about that?
- 有什么东西裂开了 - 是啊 我
- Oh. something's ripped. - Yeah. me.
你喜欢我的新手链吗？ Danny 送我的
You like my new bracelet? Danny gave it to me.
不错
It's nice.
感谢你们的到来
Thank you all for coming.
我知道我的丈夫 Stan 肯定也想来
I know my husband Stan would have loved to have been here tonight.
但可惜他不能来
but regrettably could not attend
他在家看尼克斯队的比赛呢
as he is at home watching the Knicks game.
然而 我知道我们俩会心意相通地说
However. I know that he would echo my sentiments in saying.
Rosario 你嫁给 Jack 后 我们并不是失去了一个女仆 我们……
Rosario. by marrying Jack. we are not losing a maid.we are...
是留住了个女仆
keeping a maid.
他是在昨晚晚餐时给我的
He gave it to me over dinner last night.
他下厨的
He cooked.
你敢信 Danny 会做菜了？
Can you believe Danny cooks now?
他真牛啊
He's the bomb.
欢迎到来 我们今天齐聚一堂来见证这个男人 John Phillip McFarland 和这个女人……
Welcome. We are gathered here today to join this man. John Phillip McFarland. and this woman...
Rosario Ynez Consuelo Yolanda Salazar 喜结连理
...Rosario Ynez Consuelo Yolanda Salazar. in the bond of holy matrimony.
从今天起 Rosario 和 Jack 将正式步入婚姻之旅
And today. Rosario and Jack take their first step on the road to true intimacy.
别闹 你们这帮骚受！
Shut up. you guys!
Danny 还是想带我去乡下过周末
Danny still wants to take me to the country for the weekend.
- 你怎么想的呢？ - 这要看去什么地方了
- What do you think? - Depends which country.
车臣 就算了
Chechnya. no.
（车臣 是俄罗斯里的自治共和国 就在莫斯科旁边 1994-1996年 第一次车臣战争 1999-2000年 第二次战争 虽然战争时间短 但异常惨烈 目前平息是因为搞不起内乱了 车臣目前也是对同性恋迫害最严重的地区 感兴趣的可以看纪实电影‘欢迎来到车臣’）
- 我还在想我要跟他复合 - 干得漂亮
- I also think I'm falling back in love with him. - Oh. that is beautiful.
你失心疯了吗？ 你就这么想毁了你的生活吗？
Are you out of your mind?Are you so intent on ruining your life?
Pamela Anderson 做的选择都比你正确
Pamela Anderson makes better choices than you.
（Pamela Anderson 著名女星 她跟歌手男友Tommy Lee闪婚 后因性爱录像泄露而选择自杀 被救后意外发现怀孕 之后接连产下三子 后因其男友嫉妒心极强 遭到家暴 之后打官司离婚 离婚后她还想跟前夫复合……但未果）
装不下去了吧！ （直译：为你们）
Gotcha!
举杯庆祝
A toaster.
为你们举杯庆祝
Gotcha a toaster.
你们现在是合法夫妻了 对吧？
You're registered for that. right?
我就知道
I knew it.
我就知道你觉得这是个坏主意
I knew that you thought it was a bad idea.
这就是为什么我昨天跟 Danny 分手了
That's why I broke up with Danny yesterday.
你……
You wh--
那刚刚的10分钟里 你为什么还折磨我？
why have you been baiting me for the last 10 minutes?
因为我需要确定 你认为 跟 Danny 复合是个错误
Because I needed to make sure that you thought Danny was still a mistake.
我当然觉得跟 Danny 复合是个错误
Of course I thought Danny was a mistake.
那你怎么不早跟我说 以便帮我从错误抉择的痛苦中解脱出来
Well. why couldn't you have expressed that earlier and saved me the agony of having to make my own decision?
信我 Grace 我也不希望 你以后再自己做决定了
Believe me. Grace. I don't want you making your own decisions any more than you do.
但你的确告诉过我别管闲事
but you did tell me to butt out.
别跟我玩这一套 你明知道‘别管闲事’意思是
Oh. don't play that game with me. You know damn well that butt out means
暂时放任自由 等时机成熟 再插手干预
back off temporarily until the right moment presents itself to butt back in again.
原谅我 我把‘Grace 暗语词典’落在家里了
Forgive me. I left my Grace-to-English dictionary at home.
下一次
Next time. just. you know.
你就直接告诉我什么时候该插手 什么时候该退出 什么时候玩帽子戏法 还有什么时候让我改变主意！
just tell me when to butt in and when to butt out and when to do the hokey-pokey and when to turn myself around!
别试图让我看起来 像是那个病态的疯子
Don't make me seem like the unhealthy crazy one
当你才是那个不告诉我 我该怎么做的人的时候
when you're the one who wouldn't tell me what to do.
你俩结婚多久了？ 或许到了该离的时候了
How long have you two been married? 'Cause maybe it's been long enough.
- 我们没结婚 - 我是同性恋
- We're not married. - I'm gay.
既没有结婚 你又是个同性恋 那你俩这是在演哪出啊？
Well. if you're not married and you're gay. what the hell's all this about?
Jack 娶了 Karen 的女仆
Jack just married Karen's maid.
- 难以置信 - 我懂
- Unbelievable. - I know.
继Richard Gere和Jodi Foster在‘似是故人来’里接吻之后 我就没见过令人如此不舒服的接吻画面了呢
I haven't seen a kiss that uncomfortable since Richard Gere and Jodi Foster in "Sommersby."
（Jodi Foster 朱迪·福斯特 主演了‘沉默的羔羊’等诸多热门电影和剧集 2013年公开出柜 这个剧也算是神预言了 要么就是编剧早就知道娱乐圈私生活了）
我为什么那么在乎你的看法呢？
Why do I care so much about your opinion?
或许是因为你不信任你自己
Maybe because you don't trust yourself.
问题在于我为什么那么在乎 你是否能掌控你的感情生活呢？
Big question is. why do I care so much about how you conduct your love life?
或许是因为你自己的感情生活一片空白
Maybe because you've got nothing going on in your own.
扎心
Ouch.
此话不假 但扎心
Not untrue. but ouch.
我想结婚 Will
I want to get married. Will.
- 你怎么记不住呢 我是…… - 不是跟你结婚 神经病
- Well. maybe you didn't get the memo. but l-- - Not to you. nervous.
我想在这样的礼堂下 亲吻我的男人
I want to kiss a guy under one of these things.
俺也一样
Me. too.
所以……
So...
你想试试看在这样的礼堂下 亲吻男人是种什么感觉吗？
want to see how it feels to kiss a guy under one of these things?
我觉得我们不该 再继续住在一起了
I don't think we should live together anymore.
刚刚那一吻不至于这么糟吧 Will
The kiss wasn't that bad. Will.
我也觉得我们不该 再继续住在一起了
I don't think we should live together anymore. either.
- 本来你搬进来 是为了互相疗愈 然后开始新生活 - 我知道
- It's just when you moved in. it was so we could heal and then move on.- I know.
我没感觉我开始了新生活 你呢？
And I don't feel like I've moved on.Have you?
我站在这儿 跟一个女的搂搂抱抱 这绝对是国际认证的停滞不前啊
I'm standing here making out with a girl. That's the international symbol for not moving on.
Jack！你给我滚回来 然后搞定你的‘炸卷饼’ 你可是当家的！
Jack!Get your ass back out there and finish your chimichanga!You're the host!
（chimichanga 墨西哥炸卷饼 这里指 Rosario）
我不要！
I don't want to!
Rosario 有点喝多了 然后她就变得有点毛手毛脚的了
Rosario's been doing tequila shooters and she's gettin' real handsy.
结婚太糟心了
marriage sucks.
你俩是唯一早就洞悉此事的人了
You guys are the only ones who have it figured out.
得了吧 ‘Yack’ 咱们赶紧回去把 你还需要跟 Rosario 的妈妈跳餐巾舞呢
Come on. "Yack." We're going back out there. You've still gotta do the napkin dance with Rosario's mother.
（karen 是在模仿 Rosario 口音叫 Jack）
嘿 我要锁门了 你俩可以换个地儿吗？
Hey. I've gotta lock up.You think you two can move on?
（move on 既表‘换个地儿’又表‘送往迎来，开始新生活’）
可以
Yeah.
译者片尾注： 饰演 Rosario 的女演员Shelley Morrison 于2019年12月病逝 2019年也刚好是W&G 正式完结的一年