医学中心
这是我见过最好的甲床吗 Are these my favorite nail beds I've ever seen?
不是 但它们还算健康 No, but they're fine.
好吧 我其实没打算来这里 Okay. You know, I--I wasn't actually gonna come here.
但接着我突然想到 But then, I thought, "You know what?
我想散散步 I could--I could use a walk."
我一直忙于这个 And, um, well, I've just been working on
点对点网络的点子 this peer-to-peer Internet thing,
我散步的时候思路更清晰 and well, I--I think better when I walk.
如果我一边散步一边思考 If I'm gonna be thinking and walking,
也许我会走到某个特定的地方 I might as well walk somewhere specific.
你上次睡觉是什么时候 Hey, when was the last time you slept?
我不知道 Um... I don't know.
我昨晚本来想睡的 Well, I know I--I was gonna sleep last night,
我以为我找到了 but, uh... I thought I had this solve
我一直在研究的计算信任问题的解决办法 for this computational trust issue I've been working on,
但事实上 我并没找到 but it turns out, I didn't have a solve.
但已经太晚了 我已经喝了一壶咖啡 But it was too late. I had already drank the whole pot of coffee.
好吧 我很忙 我还有其他病人 Okay. Well, I'm busy. I've got to see patients all the time.
-你在干吗 -对不起 不想打断你 -What are you doing? -Sorry. I don't want to interrupt you.
对不起 马上就好 只是突然有个想法 Sorry, just--just one second. I just had a quick thought.
你为什么要写在这上面 Why are you writing it on there?
反正每个病人来之前你都要换的不是吗 Well, I mean, you change these between every patient, right?
现在看来是得换了 I guess I'm going to have to now.
房子里的所有人 You know, all the guys at the house,
都觉得我疯了 但我没有 they think I'm nuts, but I'm not nuts.
你知道吗 听说 Hey, you know, they say that
阿兰·图灵被化学阉割后 after Alan Turing was chemically castrated,
他就不那么烦人了 he got a lot less annoying.
你说什么 What was that?
没什么 只是可以考虑一下 Nothing. Just--that's just something to think about.
好吧 当然 Okay. Sure, yeah.
请把笔给我 Pen, please.
哦 好 Right, yeah.
往前走 钱付给门外的女士 Go ahead and pay the lady out front.
最好是现金 Cash is always appreciated.
这玩意到底是怎么换的 Hmm. How the hell does this thing work?
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请听题 Question for you.
有什么比章鱼菜谱更好 What's better than octopus recipe?
答案是 Answer for you.
八种章鱼菜谱 Eight recipes for octopus.
我祖母惨死之前 My grandmother gave me a family recipe
给了我一份祖传秘方 before she died in a horrible way.
等等 你说什么 Wait. What?
抱歉 我们知道杨建的应用是关于食物的 Sorry. We knew Jian-Yang's app was in the food space,
但我们以为它是基于摄像头的 but we assumed that it was camera-based.
比如给食物拍张照 Like, you take a photo of food,
应用就会给出营养信息或者做法 the app returns nutritional information, or recipes,
或者原材料是哪里来的 or how it was sourced.
就像食物届的沙赞[听声识歌] Yeah, like Shazam for food.
没错 但这个 Exactly. But this, I mean, this is--
食物届的...沙赞[音乐识别应用] Shazam... for food.
沙赞[音乐识别应用]不是我的想法 No, Shazam's not my vision.
他们当然知道你不是在展示沙赞 Of course they know that you're not pitching Shazam.
这产品已经存在了 That already exists.
这是食物届的沙赞[音乐识别应用] This would be a Shazam... for food.
-不是 -不好意思 语言障碍 -No. -Sorry. Language barrier.
有人会说普通话吗 有吗 Do you speak Mandarin? Anybody? No?
他说的不是中文
沙赞[音乐识别应用]也识不出来
-你说的不是中文 -他口音比较难懂 -That's not Mandarin. -He's a stickler for the accent.
我的应用是海鲜 就是吃的 No, my app is seafood, like food...
-在海里的 -你能看见的 -in the sea. -That you can see.
看见的食物 看 见 的食物 Oh, "see food." S-E-E food. Oh.
-看见的食物 -这个我们喜欢 -SeeFood. -Now, that we like.
海鲜 就像海里的食物 Seafood. It's like food in the sea.
妈的 Fuck.
盖文 盖文 Oh, Gavin. Gavin.
我听说了"魔笛聊"的事 I heard about your PiperChat issue.
《儿童网路隐私保护法》的罚款可不是小事 Those COPPA fines are no joke,
可能会上十亿 could be billions.
这我知道 杰克 I'm acutely aware, Jack.
听着 你为我做了这么多事 Listen, after all you've done for me--
让我参与互利沙盒 让我在这里玩... bringing me into the Hooli sandbox, letting me play here--
要是 我做个假设 what if, hypothetically,
我有办法删除掉造成问题的 I had a way to delete the underage accounts
未成年人账号和聊天记录 and the chat data in question?
我做个假设 我可以是说'尾帧' Hypothetically, I could blame it on a malfunction
或是盒子服务器的故障 of my Endframe/Box servers.
董事会不会怪罪你 The board would have nothing to blame you for.
杰克 我不知道该说什么了 Jack, I'm speechless.
我真不好意思说 I'm embarrassed to say it,
可我都开始怀疑你的忠诚度了 but I was beginning to question your loyalty.
你确实该如此 我说了只是假设 Well, you should've. I said it was hypothetical.
没说我会这么做 Didn't say I'd do it.
进去坐下吧 盖文 Why don't you go ahead and take a seat, Gavin?
各位 盖文·贝尔森被炒了 Uh, you guys? Gavin Belson just got fired!
-理查德 -等等 什么 -Richard. -Wait. What?
天啊 这可是大事 Shit, that's huge.
"据小道消息称 "There are unconfirmed reports
贝尔森违反互利规定 that Belson violated Hooli protocol
收购拥有不良资产的企业" in the acquisition of a company that contained toxic assets."
-是我们 -天啊 盖文被炒了 -Oh, that's us! -Oh, my God. Gavin's been fired?
你是掉进泳池了吗 Did you fall in the pool?
没有 我没有 Oh, no. No, I didn't.
我只是把脚放了进去 I was, um... I was dangling my feet in,
因为水很凉 可以帮助我思考 'cause it was cool and refreshing and just helping me think,
然后 反正我身上已经湿了 and then, since I was wet anyway,
我就故意在泳池里划了会儿水 I purposefully started to wade around in the pool.
不过不用担心 我没有掉进去 Uh... But don't worry. No, I didn't fall in.
我...我不是个笨蛋 I, uh... I am not a spaz.
"贝尔森的工作将被'行动者'杰克·巴克接替 "Belson will be succeeded by 'Action' Jack Barker.
他是一位经验丰富的科技公司总裁 巴克说 "A veteran tech CEO, Barker commented,
我们互利保证将 "'We at Hooli pledge to work
与联邦商务委员会携手 "with the Federal Trade Commission
解决这个问题 并将坚决致力于 "to resolve this matter and commit ourselves
重获公众信任" to earning back the public trust.'"
迪尼希 你还真是把他害惨了 Wow, Dinesh, you really stuck it to him.
现在他们把一切都怪到了盖文头上 Now they're pinning it all on Gavin.
-天啊 -哥们 你身上真的很湿 -Holy shit. -Dude, you're moist.
抱歉 我去拿条毛巾 Oh, I'm sorry. Yeah, I'll go and get a towel.
迪尼希 你就是个巨人杀手 I mean, Dinesh, you're a... A giant slayer.
只要他是那个为未成年用户背黑锅的人就行 As long as he's the one taking the fall for these underage users.
我还以为我要向国会什么的做汇报呢 I thought I'd have to, like, answer to Congress or something.
挺有道理的 你担心愚蠢自大的 Yeah, that makes sense. You were worried sick about the wrath
政府机构的愤怒 of a bloated and inept bureaucracy,
却毫不在乎惹怒 but feel totally comfortable having crossed
一个心狠手辣妄自尊大手里有的是钱的人 a spiteful and vindictive megalomaniac with unlimited funds.
闭嘴吧你 盖文不会找我的事的 Shut up. Gavin wouldn't come after me personally.
你应该会是美国境内第一个 I think you might be the first Pakistani man
被无人机杀死的巴基斯坦人 to be killed by a drone inside the United States.
人们是不会在硅谷杀人的 People don't have people killed in the Valley.
即使是盖文·贝尔森 Not even Gavin Belson. Okay?
对吧 贾里德 Right, Jared?
我之前见他在展示会之后 I--I once saw him throw a sloth
把一只树懒扔下了楼梯 down a flight of stairs after a presentation,
他说那只是意外 不过他当时的眼神 and he said it was an accident, but he had this look in his eyes.
我不能排除这种可能性 I--I can't rule it out.
"远去的传奇 "A legacy lost.
首席执行官兼主要创始人盖文·贝尔森 CEO and chief innovator Gavin Belson
离开互利" exits Hooli."
盖文·贝尔森时代的结束 The end of the Gavin Belson era.
如果一切顺利的话 And if all goes well,
这是埃利希·巴赫曼时代的开始 it is the beginning of the era of Erlich Bachman
还有他的亚洲小放克建 and his funky Asian dude friend Jian...
建 杨建 Jian? Jian-Yang!
科曼-布莱尔合资公司刚刚为我们 Coleman Blair and Associates just offered us
提供了20万美元的种子投资 a seed investment of $200,000
用于开发食物界的沙赞[音乐识别应用] for the Shazam of food.
我们只要在周一用展示程序亮瞎他们 All we have to do is dazzle them with a demo on Monday,
然后 支票就会... and, uh, the check will--
他妈的什么情况 What the fuck? Huh?
那是我的复古科罗娜俱乐部沙滩浴巾吗 Is that my vintage Corona Club beach towel?
是的 我刚在泳池里 但是我出来了 Yes. I was in the pool, but I got out.
那是沙滩浴巾 不是在泳池用的 That's a beach towel, not a pool--
你去哪里了 我刚说你是我的亚洲小放克 Where were you? I was referring to you as my funky Asian friend.
副驾车门什么他妈玩意 The passenger door's all fucked up!
我告诉过你 没有展示程序 I told you, there's no demo.
我要做我的菜谱应用 I'm making my recipe app.
你要放弃20万美元吗 You're gonna walk away from $200,000?
你知道谁会放弃这么一大笔钱吗 杨建 You know who walks away from that kind of money, Jian-Yang?
理查德 一个疯子 Richard, a crazy person.
疯子 不 正相反 Crazy? No. Opposite.
他放弃了一千万美元 看他现在的样子 He walked away from $10 million. Now look at him--
湿的裤子 偷的浴巾 wet pants, stealing towels,
对他解决不了的技术难题喋喋不休 babbling about technical issues that he can't solve.
我离解决它就差一个计算信任问题了 I am one computational trust issue away from solving this thing.
你想最终变成这个样子吗 Is this how you wanna end up?
不 他是个警世录 No. He's a cautionary tale.
不是 不对 我不是警世录 Nope, not true. Not a cautionary tale.
有不少工作要做 我要回泳池 我没疯 Got a lot of work to do. I'll be in the pool. Not crazy.
-我是说 就像... -理查德 -I mean, it's like, wow. -Richard...
埃利希 顺便说一句 Hey, Erlich. Just FYI.
我其实在'乳报'中用了些图像识别的技术 I actually did some image recognition stuff on Nip Alert,
所以也许你可以雇我来做展示程序 so maybe you could hire me to help on the demo,
因为我爸爸最近一直催我 'cause my dad's been, like, kinda on me lately
找个工作 或者去上学 因为... to, like, get a job or go to school 'cause...
因为他对我在'魔笛聊'上丢掉那么多钱很生气 'cause he's upset that I lost all that money on--on PiperChat.
还有 在'巴赫头'上丢掉两千万也跟你有关 And then also, you helped me lose that 20 million on Bachmanity.
大头 Big Head, um...
杨建的文化 Jian-Yang's culture--
他是...中国人 he's... Chinese--
不允许他接受外界的帮助 won't allow him to accept outside help.
对啊 因为他是中国人 Oh, right, 'cause of Chinese.
好吧 有道理 Okay, well, that makes sense.
如果你们两个有谁可以 If either of you could aid
帮我开发这个图像识别软件 in the construction of this image recognition software,
我不会亏待你的 I can pay you handsomely.
在亚利桑那州立大学五年 然后退学了 Five years at ASU, then you dropped out?
没学位 No degree?
所有计算机课成绩都是C Pretty solid "C's" in all of your CS classes.
是的 Right.
但是未完成的课还是最多 But really more incompletes than anything.
是啊 好多课都在早上11点 所以 Yeah, a lot of those classes were at 11:00 A.M., so...
我很抱歉 但是我不认为 I'm sorry, but I--I don't think
你适合斯坦福计算机系 达头蒂先生 you're Stanford CS material, Mr. Bighetti.
是啊 很合理 多谢 Yeah, that's totally fair. Thanks so much.
祝你一天愉快 Have a nice day.
这张照片是你在恶魔岛的聚会上拍的吗 Oh, hey, did you get this at a party on Alcatraz?
-是的 -真棒 我也参加过一个 -Yes. -Oh, cool. I got one there, too.
我是说 严格来讲 其实是我买下来的 Or, I mean, I guess, technically, I bought one there.
都是我买的 I bought everything there.
你说什么 Excuse me?
巴赫头是我的风投基金 Oh, Bachmanity was my VC fund.
什么 What?
-风险投资的简称 -我知道 -It stands for Venture Capital. -I know. Umm...
什... Wh--
等一下 尼尔森·达头蒂 Wait. Nelson Bighetti.
你登上过《连线》杂志封面吗 Were you on the cover of WIRED magazine?
是的 还有内页 Yeah, and actually inside, too.
请问你要喝咖啡吗 Can I get you some coffee?
过去的一天太痛苦了 The last 24 hours have been very painful.
但是在未来的日子里 But in the days to come,
我想到最多的会是你们 what I will be thinking of most is all of you,
'互利'的人才 还有我们一起创造的一切 the good people of Hooli, and what we've built together.
我们创造了伟大的产品 非常伟大 And, yes, we built great products here. Great products.
但是我认为我们创造了更为伟大的纽带 But I like to think we built an even greater connection.
本着这种纽带精神 So, in the spirit of that connection,
如果你们有什么想和我说的 if any of you would like to say something to me--
无论好坏 现在是时候了 positive or negative--this is the time.
我希望大家能完全开诚布公 I encourage you to be completely honest.
别不好意思 Don't be shy.
这可能是我们最后谈话的机会了 This is most likely the last chance we have to talk.
什么都可以 Anything at all.
有人站出来了 Ah. Here we go.
陶德 我们的高级系统工程师 Todd, our senior systems engineer.
抱歉 这是我的职责所在 I'm sorry, but it's my official duty
要陪你走出公司 to... escort you off the property...
我明白 I understand.
感谢你为公司做出的贡献 Thank you for your dedication--
并收回你的胸牌 ...and relieve you of your badge.
好的 Yes.
那就这样吧 I guess this is it then.
再见 胡佛 Goodbye, Hoover.
还有你的停车牌 Your parking hang tag.
你觉得我追求这个很疯狂吗 I mean, do you think I'm crazy for chasing this thing?
别问我 我无权评判 Don't ask me. I'm hardly in a position to judge.
你能意识到我可能是 I mean, you do realize I'm
这家店里唯一一个 literally the only person in this entire grocery store
真正给自己买东西的人吧 who's actually buying stuff for myself.
我不知道 或许他们是对的 I don't know. Maybe these people are right.
或许我应该放下这个 继续前进 Maybe I just drop this one, move on,
然后去当个破跑腿骑士吗 and become some pathetic fucking TaskRabbit, you know?
我是有家室的人 混蛋 Hey, I have a family, asshole.
抱歉 不是说你 我是说其他人 Oh. Sorry. Not you, the other ones.
你想不出来也没什么好羞愧的 Look, if you can't crack this idea, there's no shame.
很多非常聪明的人都困在其中 I mean, a lot of really smart people have gotten stuck on it.
拜托 比如呢 Please. Like who?
比如彼得·格里高利 Peter Gregory for one.
彼得想构建一个完全去中心式的网络 Peter was thinking about a fully decentralized Internet?
你为什么不告诉我 Why wouldn't you mention this to me?
因为他放弃了这个想法 Well, because he walked away from it,
而你对此很感兴趣 and you seemed so excited about it,
我还以为你有了新的切入角度 I thought you had a new angle.
我不想打击你 I didn't want to discourage you.
你觉得我就这么弱不禁风吗 Oh, what, 'cause I'm some delicate little flower?
我接受不了吗 I couldn't handle it?
彼得一向很坚持 The thing is, Peter tended to cling to things,
但他放弃了这个 肯定有他的原因 and he gave up on this. I mean, he must've had a reason.
彼得有记笔记强迫症 对吧 Wait. Peter was a compulsive note-taker. Right?
他的笔记呢 你们还留着吗 What about his journals? I mean, do you guys still have them?
理查德 我在'拉维加'已经如履薄冰了 Richard, I am on thin ice as it is at Raviga.
不 莫妮卡 听着 我好几天没睡了 No. Monica, listen to me, okay? I haven't slept in days.
我穿着衣服走进泳池 I'm walking into pools fully clothed.
我现在满脑子都是这件事 拜托你了 This is all I think about. Please.
好吧 但就这一次 Fine, but just this once.
好 谢谢你 Yes. Thank you.
-操 是埃利希 他... -怎么了 -Fuck. It's Erlich. He... -What?
他想让我帮忙创建杨建那个 He wants me to help spin up this demo
扯淡的食品届的沙赞的展示程序 for Jian-Yang's bullshit Shazam-for-food app.
等等 是科曼-布莱尔刚买下的那个 Wait, the thing that Coleman Blair just bought?
那是他们的程序 That was them?
对 但交易还没完成 Yeah, but they haven't bought it yet.
他们周一才签约 I mean, they sign the deal on Monday,
但除非他们能提供可运行的展示程序 but it's all contingent on a working demo,
而他们现在拿不出 将来也不可能 which they do not and will not have.
有意思 Interesting.
跟你说 你的工作很了不起 Oh, you're doing great work by the way.
-操你妈 -绝对的 谢谢你 -Fuck you. -Definitely. Thank you.
十一点前我会把表格交给你 I'll have those forms to you by 11.
对 那应用叫嗨鲜食谱 Yeah, so it's called SeeFood,
但写成口字旁的嗨 嗨鲜食谱 懂了吗 but it's S-E-E Food, get it?
对 埃利希·巴赫曼给我看了展示程序 Yes, Erlich Bachman showed me a demo,
那程序真是不可思议 and this thing is incredible.
对 而且科曼-布莱尔 Yeah, and Coleman Blair
只开价二十万就谈成签约了 is gonna get the whole deal for only 200K.
但问题是 他们周一才最终签约 But here's the thing, they don't close until Monday.
要是我能跟劳里说上话 我就告诉她 I mean, if I had Laurie's ear, I would tell her
我们今天就该跟他们签约以绝后患 that we should pay them today and close the deal,
而巴赫曼肯定立马答应 and Bachman would jump on it in a second.
等着吃不了兜着走吧 兄弟 Go choke on that, broham.
非常有趣 Very funny.
什么有趣 What's funny?
这条消息 "你好 我很喜欢 This message. "Hey, I'm a big fan
你们对盖文·贝尔森所做的事 "of what you did to Gavin Belson.
我看了你的照片 觉得你真帅 "I've seen your photo and think you're cute.
想见个面吗 米娅" Would love to meet up. Mia."
-操你妈 -不是我发的 -Fuck you. -I didn't send that.
-你没有吗 -对撒旦发誓 -Oh, you didn't? -My hand to Satan.
但在你陷得更深 But before you go ahead
裤子里的棕色小弟弟撑起小帐篷之前 and get a little brown boner in your pants,
你也许该想到那可能不是个女人 you might wanna consider that it's not a woman.
我打赌是盖文穿个马甲在骗你 I bet you're being catfished by Gavin himself.
操 Oh, fuck.
-但是... -但是什么 -But... -But what?
万一这真是个女人 On the off chance that this is an actual real woman,
虽有被杀的可能但我也要赌一把 getting murdered seems like an acceptable risk.
问你们个事 你觉得穿着 Let me ask you something. Do you think wearing
印有大学名字的衣服去那个大学上课 the name of the college you're going to to class
跟穿着有乐队名字的衣服去那乐队的演唱会 is like the same thing as wearing the name of the band
这算一码事吗 you're going to to a concert?
-什么 -你被斯坦福大学录取了吗 -What? -Did you get into Stanford?
对 这肯定能让我爸别再烦我 Yeah, and this is totally going to get my dad off my back,
而且斯坦福的人说喜欢我的事迹 and they said they liked my story,
我要在斯坦福上计算机科学的课 so I'm gonna take a CS class there.
而且他们特别好说话 And they're so nice.
我问我上这门课能不能不打分只算通过与否 I was asking if it was gonna be pass/fail,
他们就说 "你自己决定" and they were like, "It's up to you."
然后我又问 "会有作业吗" And then I said, "Is there gonna be homework?"
他们答 "如果你想要作业的话" And they were like, "Only if you want it."
然后 我猜我还得决定要不要有作业 And so then, I guess I have to decide if I want it,
这事就已经有点像作业了 which kinda already feels like homework,
但你们觉得我 but do you think I...
我操 Holy shit.
我们就好像走进了彼得·格里高利的脑子 It's like we just walked right into Peter Gregory's brain.
其实 彼得的大脑应该是 Actually, I think Peter's brain
被冰冻保存在门洛帕克的某个地方 is in a cryo-locker in Menlo Park.
我记得彼得办公室里摆过这照片 I remember this photo from Peter's office.
我还是觉得好奇怪 It's still so weird to me
他以前跟盖文·贝尔森居然是朋友 that he and Gavin Belson were ever friends.
选择目的地 Select destination.
不 不用 谢了 No. No, no. No, thank you.
正在优化前往艾尔隆的路线 Optimizing route to Arallon.
等下 Hold on.
这些都是彼得·格里高利的笔记吗 Wait. Are all these Peter Gregory's notebooks?
是吗 是在这盒子里面吗 Are they? Are they in this box?
理查德 别忘了 你答应 Richard. Remember, you promised
今晚你会睡一下的 you were gonna get some sleep tonight.
我会的 Yeah, I will.
那这里就交给你们了 All right, I'm, uh... I'm gonna leave you guys to it.
埃利希今天接到过爱德·陈的电话吗 Oh, Erlich didn't get a call from Ed Chen today, did he?
我从免提听到他们了 Yeah. I heard them on speakerphone,
因为埃利希正在洗鼻子 'cause Erlich was neti-potting.
我想他们今晚要会面 I think, uh... I think they're meeting tonight.
那样的话就太好了 Good to know.
-那是什么 -芝麻种子 -What? -Sesame seeds.
-敬嗨鲜食谱 -敬嗨鲜食谱 -To SeeFood. -To SeeFood
也敬拉维加请的这顿饭 and to a full-expensed meal on Raviga's tab,
也敬你 爱德·陈 and to you, Ed Chen,
在劳里·布里姆眼皮底下暗度陈仓 who pulled the wool over Laurie Bream's eyes
给了我们20万 and got us two-hundo-thou sight unseen.
她比较担心 Well, she had some concerns
再次和你一起做生意 about getting into business with you again,
但那女人对我几乎是言听计从 but I can pretty much talk that broad into anything.
为那个喝一杯 Cheers to that.
你和埃利希一样是个骗子 You're a con man, like Erlich!
这是什么意思 What does that mean?
这是在我们家表示亲近的方式 It--it's a little term of endearment we have around the house.
指自信的人 Uh, a confident man.
他认为我这个人很自信 所以很崇拜我 He sees me as a confident man, and he looks up to me.
你得对他很耐心 You know, you have to be patient with him,
因为他有些白痴 'cause he's a bit of a moron.
-白痴 -不 不 -Moron? -No, no, no.
我是指他有点技术白痴 I mean, he's--Not in tech.
你觉得这草棚怎么样 像是在海岛上一样 And how about this palapa? Are we in the islands or what?
抱歉 Sorry. I--
这款应用不会很烂 是吗 This app isn't gonna suck, right?
如果很烂 这就是我的责任 If it sucks, it's my ass.
你们有可以运行的展示程序对吧 You guys have a working demo... right?
我们得缓缓 Uh, we're gonna slow down
别给这个小家伙喝太多了 on the, uh... the-the--the servings for the little one.
他来自中国的小镇 So, he's from China, a small town,
不是很适应我们城里人喝的东西 别喝了 not used to our big city liquor, and--No, no, no, no, no.
杨建 Jian-Yang.
这个非常重要
你一定要给我们一个有利可图的应用
没有 根本没有做过展示程序
没有 为什么
兄弟们 说英语 这是规矩 Boys, boys. Let's speak in English. It's the law.
我想做的是一个章鱼食谱
章鱼食谱
我听到他在叫
我是个大胖混蛋 "I'm a big fat fucking asshole."
停下 那是我 Okay, now. That's--that's me.
我为什么要叫我自己大胖混蛋 Why would I call myself a big fat asshole?
小伙子喝上头了 The liquor's gotten to the little fellow,
他说什么我都不会信的 and I wouldn't listen to a word he has to say.
吉尔弗约尔 这是米娅 Gilfoyle. This is Mia.
你是来杀迪尼希的吗 Are you gonna murder Dinesh?
-不是 -没劲 -No. -Bummer.
等下 你叫吉尔弗约尔 Wait. Gilfoyle?
死牛崇拜[黑客组织]的吉尔弗约尔吗 Are you the Gilfoyle from Bovine Dawn?
也许 Maybe.
我是MI4 I'm MI4.
不是吧 No shit.
我一直以为你是个又胖又秃的猥琐男 I always thought you were a fat, bald weirdo.
她不是 她很苗条 体毛也正常 Well, she's not. She's a thin, hairy regular.
你知道 你绝对不应该完全放弃了 You know, you were totally wrong about the dump
黑客组所有的漏洞攻击程序 of all the hacking team's best exploits.
不 如果你看看方程式组[黑客组织]的做法 No, if you look at what happened with the Equation Group,
跟我的行动基本是一致的 it was basically the same thing.
她说得对 你错了 She's right, you're wrong.
我们出发吧 Um, shall we head out?
不用熬夜等我 Don't wait up.
天啊 Oh, my God.
-我的天啊 -理查德 怎么了 -Oh, my fucking God! -Richard, what is it?
贾里德 看 都在这里 Jared, look. It's all here.
彼得·格里高知道 Peter Gregory knew the value
完全去中心化互联网的价值 of a completely decentralized Internet.
快看 "我们值得拥有的互联网" I mean, look, look. "The Internet we deserve."
你看 在那么久之前 I mean, look, even back then,
彼得就担心互联网会变为 Peter was worried that the Internet would become
由公司操控的恶心网络 this shitty corporate-controlled thing
今天互利和所有别的公司都是操纵者 that--that Hooli and all these other companies manipulate today.
但这个想法是可行的 But the idea is real.
彼得认为除非压缩率超过了 It's just that Peter didn't think it was feasible
理论极限维斯曼评分2.9 unless compression surpassed the theoretical limit
这个理念才是可行的 of a 2.9 Weissman Score.
我们在'科技博客'创业展冲破了理论极限 We shattered that limit at TechCrunch Disrupt.
是的 宝贝 没错 Yeah, baby. Exactly.
该死 我就知道 I mean, Goddammit. I always knew
我的算法会有个完美的应用前景 there was a perfect application for my algorithm.
这些笔记 可以省我几个月的时间 These notes, all this--this is going to save me months.
就是这个 我一直的是对的 我是对的 This is it. I mean, I was right all along. I was right!
我能... 我能试着做件事吗 Can I just... Can I try something?
当然 Yeah.
-好的 -我说不清 -Okay. -I don't know.
-抱歉 -没事 -Sorry. -That's okay.
你喜欢电影吗 So... do you like movies?
看是什么电影 Depends on the movie.
我也是这样的 I'm the exact same way.
它是电影 并不意味着我就喜欢它 It being a movie doesn't mean I'm gonna like it.
你们今晚想点红酒或鸡尾酒吗 Would you care for some wine or a cocktail tonight?
请给我水就好 Uh, just water, please.
请给我水就好 Just water, please.
我爱水 I love water.
我真的爱 海洋 河流 I do. Oceans, rivers...
湖水 lakes.
什么时候水塘会变成湖 When does a pond become a lake?
我猜有可能是根据深度 I wonder if it's depth.
我们的水怎么还没上 Where are those waters?
感觉我们点水是好久之前的事了 Felt like we ordered waters a while ago.
还有 什么 And--What?
真他妈混蛋 Fucking prick.
-什么 -没事 -What? -Oh, nothing.
是吉尔弗的短信 It was just a text from Gilfoyle.
-吉尔弗不是混蛋 -是的 对不起 -Gilfoyle isn't a prick. -Yeah, I'm sorry.
他是个该死的混蛋 He's a motherfucking prick.
-什么 -那个人很恶心 -What? -That guy sucks.
留言板上的所有人都讨厌他 Everyone hates him on the message boards.
等我看到他的脸我就终于明白了 You know, putting a face to the name made so much sense.
-对 因为他的脸也很恶心 -没错 -Right, 'cause his face sucks, too. -Totally!
-是的 -我得给你看他的一个帖子 -Yeah. -I have to find this one post of his.
简直有病 It was insane.
他都没有朋友 You know, he has no friends.
他假装他好像看破红尘无所牵挂 He pretends like he's all dry and witty,
但他只是个无聊乏味的烂人 but he's just a monotone piece of shit.
是撒旦崇拜者意味着人很丑陋 And being a Satanist just means you're ugly,
而且必是丑人中的翘楚 and you're leaning into it.
没错 That's right.
这样吧 可以给我杯马尔贝克红酒吗 You know what? Can I get a glass of Malbec?
或者 如果你想点一瓶的话 Unless... do you want to get a bottle?
好 来一瓶马尔贝克红酒吧 Yeah. Let's get a bottle of Malbec.
-去他妈的吉尔弗约尔 -对吧 -Fucking Gilfoyle. -Right?
达头蒂先生 Mr. Bighetti.
-您随时可以开始 -开始什么 -When you're ready. -Uh, ready for what?
这么快就成全班搞笑能手了 I'm like the class clown already.
我的名字为什么在黑板上 Why is my name on the board?
斯坦福 计算机科学 欢迎客座教授 小尼尔森·达头蒂
不是吧 Oh, no.
劳里 你要见我 Laurie, you wanted to see me?
是 莫妮卡 坐 Oh. Yes, Monica, sit.
你怀孕了吗 Are you pregnant?
-是 -恭喜啊 -Yes. -Congratulations.
-恭喜什么 -恭喜你怀孕了 -On? -On being pregnant.
也是 Oh. Yes.
周五下午 爱德·陈说服了我 Friday afternoon, Ed Chen convinced me
和科曼-布莱尔合资公司竞价 to bid against Coleman Blair
投资一个叫嗨鲜食谱的应用 on an app entitled SeeFood.
运营者是巴赫曼和在办公室里吸烟的那个 It's run by Bachman and the one who smoked in the offices.
爱德的确很会说话 Well, I--Ed is very persuasive.
今早 他提出 This morning, he made the case that
考虑到你和巴赫曼有合作历史 since you have a long-standing relationship with Bachman,
该多给你这种有才华的风投人一次机会 and since you are a talented VC who deserves a second chance--
该你来负责这个项目 他的原话 his words--you should take lead.
什么 What?
你们看这个图 I mean, look at this drawing.
我在我医生的垫屁股纸上画了一样的 I drew the exact same thing on my doctor's butt paper.
彼得有过完全一样的想法 I mean, Peter had the exact same idea.
他只是在等压缩算法的技术成熟 He was just waiting for compression to catch up,
而多亏了我 现在已经赶上来了 which it did, thanks to me.
高兴点 理查德 Cheer up, Richard.
谢谢 但下面才是最重要的部分 Yes, but here's the best part, okay?
彼得从没预见到 联网的 Peter never foresaw the ubiquity
计算设备会像现在这样普遍 of Internet connected computing devices. Right?
相机 冰箱 电视 婴儿监护仪 Camera, refrigerators, TVs, baby monitors,
更不要说遍布全球 数十亿计的 not to mention the billions-plus smartphones
智能手机了 that are floating around the world.
你就说这里都谁有智能手机吧 I mean, who here has a smartphone, right?
你 你 我 杨建 迪尼希 莫妮卡 You, you, me, Jian-Yang, Dinesh, Monica...
理查德 你不用把认识的人都数一遍 Richard, you don't have to name everyone you know.
问题是 我穿着衣服 Point is... you all thought I was crazy
走进泳池的时候 你们都觉得我疯了 when I walked into the swimming pool with my clothes on,
但其实 我全说中了 but it turns out I was fucking right.
我才没疯 正相反 你们这群蠢货 Okay. So, not crazy. Opposite. You poor idiots.
学上得怎么样 提米 How was school, Timmy?
不怎么样 他们逼我教课 Oh, not great. They made me teach.
-教什么 -斯坦福 -Teach what? -Stanford.
大头 你现在是斯坦福的教授了吗 You're a professor at Stanford now, Big Head?
不 那也太可怕了 我是客座教授 No, that would be crazy. I'm a guest lecturer.
你这是干什么 What are you doing?
门没锁 再说你有钥匙 It was open, and you have the keys.
奇怪 你们换锁芯了吗 Strange. Did you change the locks?
昨晚我出门约会的时候 钥匙还能使 'Cause the keys were working last night when I went for my date.
而那之后我都没回家 所以 'Cause I haven't come back to the house since my date, so...
我跟她上床了 I did sex on her.
-不错 -挺好 -Good. -Cool.
是不错 Yeah, that's great.
不错啊哥们 她是谁啊 Nice, man. Who is she?
她叫米娅 她棒极啦 Her name is Mia, and she is a-Mia-zing.
她差不多和我一样讨厌吉尔弗约尔 She hates Gilfoyle almost as much as I do, so...
如此草率地和MI4坠入爱河 Huh! Jumping headlong into a sexual relationship with MI4.
有胆量 但我确定你一定考虑好后果了 Ballsy. But I'm sure you've thought through the consequences.
约会又不是去忙着动脑子的 Well, we weren't really doing a lot of thinking.
懂我的意思吧 You know what I mean?
-哇 -米娅是个实打实的黑客 -Oh, wow. -Mia is a legit hacker.
据说她被雇来攻击中国政府 People say that she's taken on the Chinese government,
而你 就吃了一顿饭 and here you are, after one meal,
就和她进展到如此亲密 in an intimate relationship.
所以呢 So?
所以你觉得如果你要甩了她 她会怎么做 So what do you think she'll do if you try to break up with her?
或者说不同意她 或者说让她失望了 Or disagree with her? Or disappoint her in any way,
比如承认你能击垮盖文·贝尔森 like by confessing that your badass takedown of Gavin Belson
其实纯属意外 was a total accident?
还是说 你已经告诉他了 Unless, you've already told her.
我没找到机会说 It didn't come up.
我肯定等到她发现 Well, I'm sure that when she finds out
你们的爱情是建立在一长串谎言之上 that your entire relationship is based on a lie of omission,
她一定会理解你的 she'll be very understanding.
那又怎样 我们不会分手的 So what? We just won't breakup.
一辈子吗 Ever?
一辈子 Ever.
埃利希 Erlich.
你知道爱德·陈在劳里面前 Do you know how badly Ed Chen just
他妈的怎么对我的吗 fucked me with Laurie?
这么跟你说吧 Let me tell you something.
3P永远都是糟糕的 尤其是对新手来说 A threesome is always awkward, especially the first one.
劳里老了点... Laurie being a little bit older--
我说的是嗨鲜食谱 I'm talking about SeeFood.
你和杨建到底弄出了什么 What do you and Jian-Yang have?
屁都没有 A whole lot of nothing.
你... 不不不不不 Are you--no. No, no, no, no, no.
嗨鲜食谱必须得牛逼 SeeFood has to be great.
我的工作就指望它了 My job depends on it.
爱德·陈撤手了 把这烂摊子丢给了我 Ed Chen bailed and dumped the whole thing on me.
理查德 来下厨房 我有事找你谈 Richard, can I speak with you in the kitchen for a moment?
好的 Yup. Sure.
什么事 So, what's up?
听我说 Well, here's the thing.
当时你不是对这儿写的电话号码好奇吗 Remember that phone number you were curious about in here?
这不是电话号码 是专利号 Well, it's not a phone number. It's a patent number.
互联网专利 跟你想搭建的互联网完全一样 A patent for exactly what you were planning to build.
彼得申过专利了 So Peter patented it.
不 我... No, I, um...
-我问了布莱恩·方 -谁 -I spoke to Brian Fong. -Who?
布莱恩·方 Brian Fong.
他说彼得对这一设想非常兴奋 And he told me that Peter was very excited about the idea,
可是有人对他不满意 but there was some resentment
因为他并没专注在整个团队的工作上 that he wasn't focused more on what the team was working on,
所以团队中有人申了专利 so one of them went out and got a patent on it.
那他为什么不继续做 Why didn't this guy pursue it?
这项专利只是为了让彼得能够 Well, the patent was just a roadblock to keep
更加专注于他们的创业公司而设置的路障 Peter focused on the company they were starting...
而这家公司正是'互利'的前身 a company that went on to be known as Hooli.
等等 等等 Wait, wait. Wait, wait, wait. Sst!
你的意思是说 So you're telling me that
我的算法最完美的用途 the perfect application of my algorithm
竟然他妈的属于盖文·贝尔森 belongs to Gavin fucking Belson?
恐怕是这样 I'm afraid so.
理查德 你没事吧 Richard, are... you okay?
没事 就是清掉点东西 Uh, yes. Just putting something away.
没错 绝对没疯 Yep. Not crazy.
正相反 Opposite.
理查德 让我进来 你的鞋在我这 Richard, you gotta let me in. I have your shoe.
抱歉就这么闯进来 All right, I'm--I'm sorry to barge in here,
可你得吃点东西 不然... but you have to eat something or you'll...
哪位 Hello?
我是理查德 It's Richard...
亨德里克斯 理查德·亨德里克斯 Hendricks. Richard Hendricks.
我找盖文·贝尔森 有要事和他谈 I'm here for Gavin Belson, and we really need to talk.