(gentle music)
(thunder cracks)
- [Billy] Mistake on the lake.
- [Man] You say somethin'?
- That's what they call this place, isn't it?
Mistake on the lake?
- [Man] Hell no, they called it
the best location in the nation.
- They're lyin'.
(neon signs buzz)
Hey hey, what do you say.
Watch your ass, I'm coming your way.
Screw it.
(people chattering)
(cars honking)
Good mornin', darlin'.
Ain't you just as sweet as a Georgia peach.
I'm here to see Cecil Simms.
- Do you have an appointment with Mr. Simms?
- You got a pair of titties in there
or are you just playin' dress up?
- Mr. Simms?
- Hey there, Cecil.
You look good.
- You look like shit, Dwayne.
(Billy laughs)
What happened to Baltimore?
- My ratings were good.
- Your ratings were always good.
- Well, you know I did a record hop with Little Richard.
- Little Richard got you canned?
- Well, it's a real white town, it was a real black show.
You know I like that sweaty collar
and dirty fingernail music, Cecil.
- Are you telling me you got fired
just because you like race music?
- You gonna make me ask you, man?
Jesus Christ, Cecil, I mean I tried everywhere else.
Des Moines, I even tried goddamn Des Moines.
I even tried Kalamazoo.
Don't make me go through this, man.
- Seven to 12, two to five.
I'll pay you what you got in Baltimore.
Weekends.
- Thank you, Cecil.
- Don't thank me.
Just don't try to cheat me.
- I ain't gonna cheat you, man.
I know the rules.
- Good.
What's your hep cat name gonna be?
Billy Starlight?
Billy Thunder?
Billy Magic.
- I ain't been Billy Magic since Fort Worth.
- Clean yourself up.
Get yourself a decent haircut, will ya?
Buy a new suit for Christ sake.
Get a tan, you gotta have a tan.
- It's winter, Cecil.
- Buy a lamp.
- Hey, what about a kid?
- Hire one, just make sure he's the right kid.
- The Billy Magic WHK High School
Hall of Fame presents, ta-da.
- Duh.
Duh, duh!
Why can't I say it?
Rock and roll is the goal designed to give you soul.
- [Billy] This is WHK Cleveland.
Are you ready for your Billy Magic WHK
High School Hall of Fame winner for the day?
To elect someone to the Billy Magic WHK
High School Hall of Fame send us a postcard
with the name of your favorite high school student.
You cannot vote for yourself.
All entries must be signed.
All signatures will be authenticated by--
♪ WHK caller radio ♪
- [Billy] In the Billy Magic WHK
High School Hall of Fame today
from Cleveland Latin High School, Kevin Boyle.
♪ My heart is crying, crying ♪
♪ Lonely teardrops ♪
(Karchy speaking in foreign language)
- English.
Please, teach the English.
- What are you doin', Pop?
- I study test.
- You should be asleep.
- I know.
I got to be American citizen.
We together.
You study for test.
You gonna be American citizen, too.
- Don't worry about it, Pop.
- Don't worry, worry.
I worry!
Want a pork chop, Karchy?
- [Karchy] For breakfast?
I already got an RC Cola.
- RC Cola, for breakfast?
We have been in this country seven years.
I no understand that thing.
Your tie, let me fix it.
- [Billy] That takes care of everybody.
Everybody walking, riding, sitting down, talking--
- See ya, Pop.
- See ya, see ya.
Take a easy.
- [Karchy] Take it easy, Pop.
- Take a easy, see ya.
- [Karchy] Bye, Papa.
♪ Boppin' at the high school hop ♪
♪ Shakin' at the high school hop ♪
♪ Movin' at the high school hop ♪
♪ Rockin' at the high school hop ♪
♪ Well, everybody hoppin' ♪
♪ Everybody boppin' ♪
♪ Boppin' at the high school hop ♪
♪ Come on little baby, let's rock a little bit tonight ♪
♪ Let's get with it, sugar, let's shake it up tonight ♪
♪ Well my heart's a beatin' rhythm ♪
♪ And my feet are moving smooth and light ♪
♪ Boppin' at the high school hop ♪
- Hey.
Hang loose, mother goose, your ride's drippin' tomato juice.
What, it's funny.
- You're a dipshit, Croak.
- It's funny.
(students chattering)
He got into the hall of fame.
- I heard.
See ya.
- Hey, Karch Ass. (laughs)
(bell rings)
- [Father Norton] Will you turn that thing off?
I want to speak with you, Mr. Jonas.
You got a C in history.
A D in sociology.
A D in physics.
- I got a B in English.
- [Father Norton] What will you do
when you graduate, Mr. Jonas?
- [Karchy] I don't know.
- [Father Norton] Your father has sacrificed
so much to send you here, and all for what?
You think you'll be able to get
a scholarship to go to college?
- [Karchy] I don't know.
- Well, I do.
The answer is no.
Do you think you can even get into college
with your grades, Mr. Jonas?
- I can get into Cleveland State.
Anybody can get into Cleveland State.
- You know your father doesn't have
the money to send you to Cleveland State.
So if you can't get into college on your own
and you can't get a scholarship,
what will you do with yourself, Mr. Jonas?
- Maybe I'll join the priesthood, Father.
- Congratulations. - Just get her number.
- Nice job, Kevin. - Hey, Kevin.
- It's not a big deal. - Kev, good job.
- [Boy] Hey guys, how's it going?
- [Amos] He's got this band gig.
Blood Smith and the Tenderloins.
- Man. - Working up his tunes.
- [Croak] Blood Smith and the Tenderloins?
- What's wrong with that?
- Sounds good to me, Amos.
- Well, who's Blood Smith?
- Well, that's me.
- You heard that new Pat Boone song, it's neat.
- Pat Boone, neat?
Oh Jesus, Stephen.
- [Croak] At least it ain't no shine music.
- Look man, I love you from the heart of my bottom.
- [Croak] So, what's the matter with you?
- Father Norton wants me to join the priesthood.
- [Croak] Huh?
- He thinks I can be Bishop.
- A bishop?
- What about Pope?
Don't you want to be Pope, too?
- I don't think so.
(crickets chirping) (car honks)
- [Henry] Hey, please be careful with the eggs.
For Christ's sakes we got a lot of broken eggs here.
- I'm not breakin' the eggs, Henry.
- Alls I'm sayin' is be careful
while you're bringing 'em in.
- [Karchy] Oh, please take it easy, Henry.
- Henry, why don't you give the kid a break?
- Yeah, I'm just kinda trying to run a business here, so.
- [Man] We need a hand.
- Hey, Diney. - Mm-hmm.
- You ever read Huckleberry Finn?
It's great, I read it about six times.
Everything's in there.
Life and stuff. - Mm.
- You didn't read it?
- It's for little kids.
- No, it isn't.
I'll bring it for you.
It's a fun book.
- What is this, a social hour?
Jonas, you're taking all night.
Come on, unload the truck, it's out there.
- Hey Karchy, I'll help ya.
- [Karchy] I got this scholarship, didn't I tell ya?
Princeton, you've heard of it, right?
- [Diney] Let's just get the damn eggs.
- I think I want to be a writer.
I haven't written nothing yet.
One of these days I'm going to start.
- [Diney] Mm-hmm.
- [Karchy] I'm gonna be in the Billy Magic
WHK High School Hall of Fame, too.
- [Diney] Mm-hmm.
- [Karchy] And now, in the Billy Magic
WHK High School Hall of Fame,
from Cleveland Latin High School, Karchy Jonas.
So when you gonna go out with me, Diney?
How many times I gotta ask? - Hey, watch the eggs.
For Christ sakes, will you please just watch the eggs?
- [Announcer] The shipment from Toledo is in.
- You wanna go out with me?
I'll go out with you.
- He's a baby, Diney.
What do you want to go out with him for?
- You will? - Yeah.
- [Karchy] When?
- When you get into the hall of fame, that's when.
- Hall of fame.
Hall of fame?
Diney, the kid don't even play ball.
♪ Willie and Millie got married last fall ♪
♪ They had a little Willie Junior and that ain't all ♪
♪ Well, the baby got famous in his crib, you see ♪
♪ By doing the hand jive on TV ♪
♪ Hand jive, hand jive, hand jive ♪
♪ Doing that crazy hand jive ♪
(crowd cheers)
- All right, Cleveland Latin High School.
Hey, hey, what do you say?
Billy Boy's comin' your way.
Rock and roll, this is gold.
Designed to give you soul, baby.
Now this next tune is gonna put shivereens down your spine.
From the Billy Magic hop shop,
here comes Little Anthony and the Imperials
doin' Shimmy Shimmy Ko-Ko Bop.
♪ Oh, oh ♪
♪ Shimmy shimmy ko-ko bop ♪
♪ Shimmy shimmy bop ♪
♪ Shimmy shimmy ko-ko bop ♪
♪ Shimmy shimmy bop ♪
♪ Sittin' in a native hut ♪
♪ All alone and blue ♪
♪ Sittin' in a native hut ♪
♪ Wonderin' what to do ♪
♪ Along came a native girl ♪
♪ Did a native dance ♪
- Hey. - Hey.
♪ Like in paradise ♪
♪ Put me in a trance, going ♪
♪ Shimmy shimmy ko-ko bop ♪
- What are you going to do,
stand around all night watching him?
Come on, let's go get something to eat.
(wistful music)
Look at that Caddy.
Man, driving that thing would be more fun than doing it.
- That's him.
I bet he doesn't take shit from no one.
I'm going to drive one of them some day.
- In your dreams.
- I'm going to be him someday.
No shit from no one.
Duh.
Shit.
Duh, duh.
Double shit.
That's duh truth.
Duh, truth, duh.
Duh, duh.
That's duh truth.
- [Billy] Hey there, chappie,
hello, chicks, it's a gone deal,
but I'm on a reel so stand by me the patches go,
but first here's the word from this rockin' bird.
The winner of the WHK High School Hall of Fame
today from Cleveland Latin High, Karchy Jonas.
- [Karchy] That's me, that's me!
- Jeez, they even pronounced your name right.
- Sure they did, why wouldn't they?
- Everybody's talking about you.
- Well, what are they saying?
- They're just jealous.
- Sure they are.
- There's a telephone call for you in the office, Mr. Jonas.
- There is?
- [Croak] Billy Magic called you here?
Can I come down there with you?
- Nah, he said he wanted to talk to me alone.
Maybe we all can go get a hamburger some time.
- Maybe we can ride in his Cadillac.
- [Karchy] Sure.
- Oh, God.
- Hey, let me see your radio, Jon-ass.
- Get in there, man. - Get it.
- Let me see it, asshole. (radio clatters)
(boys snickering) - What are you gonna do now?
- [Kevin] Come on, punk.
(boys yelling)
- Rip his head off, Kevin! - Get him!
- Come on!
- Oh-ho! - Yeah, boy.
- Jerk.
- White trash. - Loser.
- [Croak] You okay?
(gentle music)
- Last name, uh-huh. - And the winner of
the WHK High School
Hall of Fame is-- - That's me.
- Karchy Jonas from-- - Hold on, can I help you?
- I'm Karchy Jonas, I'm here to see Billy Magic.
- He's on the air.
- I know, I never miss his show.
- Well, why don't you sit over there until he's finished.
- Okay, thanks. - Sure.
Yeah, okay.
Uh-huh, what was your first name?
Okay, 5 p.m., uh-huh.
And what's that number?
You can go back now.
Right around the corner.
("Love You So" by Ron Holden)
♪ My darling, I love you so ♪
♪ More than you'll ever know ♪
♪ Each night I kneel and say a prayer ♪
♪ Hoping when I wake you'll still be there ♪
♪ I need your love with all my heart ♪
♪ Promise me we'll never part ♪
♪ We have a love that's sure to be ♪
♪ True love for all eternity ♪
- Caught you.
Come on in.
♪ No matter what I may do ♪
♪ Remember my love is true ♪
♪ We have a love that's sure to be ♪
- [Billy] Jesus, what happened to you?
- I fell off the bus.
- Yeah, it must have been speedin'.
Sit down, kid.
All right, that's Ron Holden with I Love You So.
And you know I do, baby.
WHK Fender Bender Chrome Bumper Thumper time is 3:55,
and it's time for Dave Buckel and the Action Central News,
brought to you by Gruen watches.
Gruen watches can be found at Higbee's Department Store.
Gruen watches, terrific time pieces for him or for her.
Gruen watches make the perfect gift.
Your girlfriend mad at you, why not give her a good Gruen?
So what the hell kind of name is Karchy?
- Hungarian.
It's Charles, I hate Charles.
- How about Chucky?
- [Karchy] I like Karchy better.
- [Billy] What about your parents?
- My mom, she died in the camps.
- Camp? - Refugee camps.
We were in refugee camps before we come over here.
- What's your daddy do?
- He's a doctor.
- Yeah, right.
Here's your certificate, kid.
Tell me somethin', kid.
These postcards, you sent them in yourself, didn't you?
- What?
- They're all signed the same way.
- No, they're not. - Yes, they are.
What'd you do, forge these kids' signatures?
- What are you, a handwriting expert?
- (laughs) What if I was to go down to this school,
talk to the kids whose names are on these cards,
what do you think they'd say?
- Go talk to 'em.
- You lie good, kid.
Stick around.
Hey, hey, what do you say, Billy Boy's comin' your way.
Where we goin'?
Someplace we can talk.
You just goin' to stand there or are you gonna get in?
(car honks)
How's the eye?
- It's fine.
- Yeah, it looks real good.
So, you ever ridden in a Cadillac car before?
- Sure, lots of times.
- You want to drive? - What?
- Know how to drive, don't you?
- I don't have a license.
- Yeah but you've driven before, haven't you?
- Sure, lots of times.
- Where we goin'?
- [Billy] Ho Jo's on Carnegie.
We're gonna get us some filet mignon.
You like filet mignon, don't you?
- Sure, it's one of my favorites.
- Yeah, you're a real killer stud, aren't you, Chucky?
(soft classical music)
How's your filet?
- It's great.
- I think I'm gonna go down
to Cleveland Latin High School
and tell the principal about these postcards.
- I got nothin' to hide.
- I think you're slicker than two snakes
screwing in a barrel of snot, that's what I think.
You want a job, Slick?
- [Karchy] I got a job.
I work at the West Side Market every night.
- Oh, okay, never mind.
- What kind of job?
- Help me out down at the station.
Afternoons after school.
Record hops on weekends.
$100 a week, more sometimes.
- $100 a week?
- More sometimes.
- Why do you want me to do it?
- I don't know.
I feel bad about the way I gave you a hard time before.
I didn't mean to.
- It's okay.
When would I start?
- Tomorrow afternoon.
It's just one thing though.
- What?
- You got to tell me man to man,
you sent those postcards in yourself.
You forged those kids signatures, didn't you?
- No, that's the truth.
- (laughs) Screw it.
You got yourself a job, Slick.
- Look, it's the certificate.
Don't believe me?
Billy Magic, WHK High School Hall of Fame.
Karchy Jonas.
- You really did it.
- That's the truth.
So how about it?
- You ever been out on a date before?
- Sure, lots of times.
- Okay.
- Okay?
Okay.
Hi.
- Hi, Chuck, right?
Billy's told me all about you.
He's waiting for you.
- And that was Mule Skinner Blues by the Fendermen.
Those boys who play down south,
you know what they call those boys,
the band goes with music 'cause they got no ear.
Great train on the rail!
You and me, we gonna wail.
It's 80 WHK degrees outside.
Looks like we got ourselves another burner
but Magic's gonna cool you down right now,
baby, with some ear conditioning.
Here comes Ike and Tina Turner.
♪ Darling ♪
♪ Yes, Tina ♪
♪ It's time to get next to me ♪
♪ Honey, that was my plan from the very beginning ♪
- Come on in, Chucky.
Lesson number one, something's playing
on this turntable you cue one up on this one.
Just drop the needle down.
Give me about two inches before the start of the song.
(phone rings) Get that.
Say, the Magic Man.
Get it, will ya?
- Hello, the Magic Man.
Catherine.
- Call her back.
- He'll call you back.
Thanks, bye.
- All right, first thing Monday morning
you call the record stores,
you get the list of their top 40.
You write the list down.
You give the list to me.
You can call from my office.
(phone rings) Get the phone,
say the Magic Man.
- The Magic Man.
- Rosemary. - Rosemary, ooh.
I woke up that morning, I had to take a piss.
I look down, all I see was teeth marks.
Call her back.
- He'll call you back.
Thanks, bye.
- Talk to them nice man, call 'em
sweetie or honey or something.
I might want her to chew me up again.
Here you go, here's your first week's pay.
Try that jacket on there, see if it fits.
Oh, liquid courage.
Hey, looks good, man.
Now you got yourself a lucky suit.
- [Istvan] How come he pick you?
- [Karchy] He didn't pick me, Papa.
I was in the High School Hall of Fame.
The school votes.
- [Istvan] School pick you?
- Yeah.
- And why this Magic give you job?
- I don't know, I guess he likes me.
- How much time you work?
- Two, three hours after school.
Weekends sometimes.
- How much he pay?
Oh, this is big money.
How are you gonna study?
- I can still study, Pop.
We need the money.
- Seem too easy.
- This is America, Papa.
Hey, hey, what do you say?
Karchy Jonas is comin' your way.
How are you, darlin'?
How you doin', darlin'?
- Hey, what's up? - Hey.
- [Croak] I got some stuff for ya.
Jeez, where did you get that?
- [Karchy] Billy gave it to me.
- [Croak] What's that stuff you're puttin' in your hair?
- [Karchy] It's the same stuff Billy uses.
- [Croak] Look, penicillin, you take two now, get laid.
You ain't gonna get no diseases.
Take it.
- [Karchy] French ticklers.
I know all about that stuff.
- Yeah, well you don't know about this.
- What is it? - Spanish fly.
You put in her drink and she'll be ready
to do the door knobs.
- Door knobs?
- Just put it in your pocket.
(car honking)
(Karchy knocks)
- [Diney] Coming.
- How are you, darling?
- I am not your darling.
I hate red.
What did you do to your hair?
- I, uh, I combed it back.
- [Diney] I liked it better the other way.
- So I figured we'd go down to Howard Johnson's on Carnegie.
- I'm not going to no motel.
- They have a restaurant there.
A mean filet mignon.
You want to catch a cab?
- No, no, I want to take a bus.
And I think we should go someplace close,
'cause I don't want to stay out too late, okay?
- Sure.
So, I don't know what I'm going to do.
I mean, I could go to Princeton with a scholarship
or I could stay at WHK and become
a disc jockey in a couple of years.
- You could never be a disc jockey.
- Sure I could, what do you mean?
- Say the.
- What?
- Say the.
- Duh.
I can learn to say it, I practice.
Steak's really good, huh?
I love filet mignon, don't you?
I have it all the time.
- Why do you gotta blow smoke all the time?
- Where you going? - To the bathroom.
♪ You got the magic touch ♪
♪ It makes me glow so much ♪
- How do you feel?
- What do you mean how do I feel?
- How was your dinner?
- I feel like I got to throw up.
- What?
- I feel sick.
- Maybe it was the milk shake.
- It didn't taste sour.
- Are you going to be okay?
I'll come in with you.
- [Diney] No, no, it's all right.
- Come on, I just wanna make sure you're gonna be okay.
(Diney coughs) Are you okay?
♪ You got the magic touch, ooh ♪
- Diney. ♪ It makes me glow so much ♪
♪ It cast a spell, it rings a bell ♪
♪ The magic touch ♪
♪ Oh when I feel your charm ♪
- Croak.
♪ It's like a four alarm ♪
♪ You make me thrill so much ♪
- [Croak] Here, here, let me feel her pulse.
- Who's he?
- It's okay, he's a doctor.
- [Diney] Oh, shut up, Karchy.
- She's not gonna die, is she?
- No, no, I've seen that color before they die.
- I'm not gonna die.
- Isn't there an antidote?
- What antidote?
- I didn't say anything about an antidote.
- For what?
What did you give me?
What did you give me, Karchy, tell me!
- [Karchy] Spanish fly.
- You--
- It was guaranteed, this wasn't supposed to happen.
- Get out of here.
Get out of here.
Get out of here!
Get out! (sobs)
♪ And now I've learned, I can return ♪
♪ The magic touch ♪
♪ Here I go reeling ♪
- Come on, she's gonna be okay.
- I really like her, Croak.
Why did I do such a stupid thing?
- You coming?
♪ I didn't know too much ♪
♪ And then I felt your touch ♪
♪ And now I've learned, I can return ♪
♪ The magic touch ♪
♪ Do, do, do, do, do, do ♪
(water splashes)
- Diney, I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to hurt you.
Diney.
(students chattering)
Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.
It's been about a month since my last confession.
- Continue.
- I lied a couple of times and stuff.
But what I want to talk about.
- Continue.
- This girl, I went out with her.
- And?
- And I put a Spanish fly in her milkshake.
- You did what, Mr. Jonas?
- I did, Father.
But I like her.
- Do you have any idea what you've done, Mr. Jonas?
- Yes, Father, and I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to hurt her.
- What happened to her?
You're worthless, Mr. Jonas.
- I'm not.
- You're worthless.
You're worthless.
What happened to her?
- Well, I don't remember much, Father.
But when I got up the next morning to take a piss,
I looked down and all I could see was teeth marks.
She nearly chewed it half off.
♪ Ran in the water, heart full of fear ♪
♪ There in the breakers I saw her near ♪
♪ Reach for me, darling, held her to me ♪
♪ Stole her away from the angry sea ♪
♪ I looked at the sea and it seemed to say ♪
♪ I took your baby, from you away ♪
♪ My heart cried out, she's mine to keep ♪
♪ I saved my baby from an endless sleep ♪
♪ Endless sleep, endless sleep ♪
- So what do you think, Billy?
- I don't know, maybe, who knows.
This here is Chucky Jones.
Chucky, Danny Hogan, Timmy Morelli.
- How you doin', Chucky?
- [Billy] Chucky's my man.
- I'll play it again for ya.
- That's all right, Danny, I heard it four times.
- Hey, Billy, look.
We're breakin' out in Pittsburgh.
We're top 40 in Philly.
We break it here, we get a shot at Cashbox.
- Well, I'll give another listen, see if it goes down on me.
Anything top 40, it's gotta go down on me.
(Danny chuckles)
Boys, I gotta get back in my cage.
Tell you what, why don't you talk
to Chucky about it and see what he thinks.
- You want to hear it, kid?
- Sure.
("Endless Sleep")
- Here.
Make sure you give it to Billy.
Go on, take it.
- What is it?
- It's a birthday present.
It was nice meeting you, kid.
(harmonica music)
- [Billy] You're looking mighty slick, Slick.
- I didn't know it was your birthday.
- What? - Happy birthday.
Too bad no one else got you anything.
I'll give you my gift tomorrow, I didn't know.
- Yeah, that's okay, Chucky.
You can buy me a beer after work.
You drink beer, don't you?
- Sure, lots of times.
- Listen to this, man, now this is music.
♪ Please tell me you love me ♪
- Yes, sir.
Smirnoff vodkas for me and a beer for my man.
Oh lord, the things they can do with the potato.
You got that Mary Lou's phone number, man, let me have it.
I wanna give her a call later on.
You want to come along and get sloppy seconds be my guest.
You got a girlfriend?
- [Karchy] Mm-hmm.
- You done the nasty yet?
Made a love connection?
- Sure, lots-- - Lots of times. (laughs)
That's my Chucky, man.
Hey listen, we got that Hop at the armory coming up.
I want you to get over there
and make sure the floor is cleared
because I'm not going to be folding no chairs.
Here, let me give you a bonus.
Here's a dead president for ya.
Save up for that Cadillac car.
- You must be a millionaire being a disc jockey.
- You want to be a disc jockey, man?
- No, I can't.
- Why not? - I can't talk English.
- You talk English all right.
- No, it's the Hungarian.
I can't say duh.
My tongue, I can't get it right.
- Try puttin' a rubber band on it.
- I never thought of that.
- Listen, Slick, you know you can do
anything you put your mind to.
I mean you got into the High School
Hall of Fame, didn't you?
- Hello, Karchy.
Out so late again?
- Hiya, Pop.
I was just with Billy.
- [Istvan] I'm Karchy's father.
- Doctor Istvan Jonas.
- Right.
- How you doin'?
The name's Billy Magic.
You got a good kid here in Slick.
- Who is Slick?
- That's me, Pop.
- What it mean, Slick?
- [Billy] Oh, it just means he's cool.
- Cool?
He cold?
He no cold.
- Jesus Christ, Pop, you know that's not what it means.
- [Billy] No, no, it just means I like him, that's all.
- Oh good, good.
- Hey, they must work you pretty hard
at the hospital there, Doc.
- Hospital?
Who's sick?
- Nobody's sick, Pop.
Come on, it's getting late, Billy's got to go.
- See ya, see ya.
- Yeah, you take it easy there, Doctor.
- Happy birthday, Billy.
- Hey, don't forget about the rubber band.
- All right, I'll remember that.
Hey, Pop, I got 50 bucks today.
Hey, Pop, I'm going to be a disc jockey in a couple years.
I'm gonna be just like Billy Magic, Pop.
Duh.
Asshole.
- [Istvan] Asshole.
- Yeah, that's the truth.
- Good night, Slick, I love you.
- I love you too, Papa.
- Hey, big shot.
I hear we ain't good enough for you no more.
- Hey, Diney, I bought you Huckleberry Finn.
- [Henry] Ha, told you he was a baby.
- How are you? - Fine.
- You don't want to get an ice cream cone, do you?
- [Henry] An ice cream cone.
- Henry's driving me home, Karchy.
- You still owe me for those eggs you broke.
- I didn't break no eggs.
- You cracked them.
- And now for all you sweet young things out there.
You're all so sweet and some young things.
Let me give you a little Billy Magic piece of advice.
No matter what they say, you're never too sweet
or too young to be in love.
So go ahead, ladies, just grab that special guy
'cause this next dance is gonna be chicks' choice.
Now let me introduce you to my next guest.
You know, when they talk about talent
and they talk about a voice,
this is the man that they mention.
They say he's gonna be bigger than Bobby Rydell.
Let me tell you somethin', ladies,
from what I heard he already is.
Here he is right now from South Philadelphia,
Pennsylvania, the Billy Magic
Pick to Click, Mr. Timmy Morelli.
♪ The night was black, rain falling down ♪
♪ Look for my baby, she's nowhere around ♪
♪ Traced her footsteps down to the shore ♪
♪ 'Fraid she's gone forever more ♪
♪ I looked at the sea and it seemed to say ♪
♪ I took your baby from you away ♪
♪ I heard a voice cryin' in the deep ♪
♪ Come join me, baby, in my endless sleep ♪
- Looks like Billy liked the song.
- All you got to do is get his attention.
- You get him another happy birthday card?
- What are you, a wise guy, kid?
- No.
♪ That's why her footsteps ran to the sea ♪
♪ That's why my baby has gone from me ♪
♪ I looked at the sea and it seemed to say ♪
♪ I took your baby from you away ♪
- As soon as my man Chucky loads that car we hit the road.
You see the blond back there with the headlights?
- Yeah. - She wants your steak.
- What?
- She's so hot you gonna have to hose her down.
You got something for me?
- Oh, yeah, I almost forgot.
- First she thought you were a little green,
then I told her what a killer stud you were.
Let's get downtown.
("Down in Mexico" by The Coasters)
♪ Down in the Mexicali ♪
♪ There's a crazy little place that I know ♪
♪ Where the drinks are hard ♪
- How are you, darlin'?
♪ And the boss is a cat named Joe ♪
♪ He wears a red bandana, plays a blues piano ♪
♪ In a honky-tonk, down in Mexico ♪
- Help yourself to my liquor, but don't scratch my records.
♪ And a black mustache ♪
♪ In a honky-tonk, down in Mexico ♪
♪ Well, the first time that I saw him ♪
♪ He was sittin' on a piano stool ♪
♪ I said, tell me dad, when does the fun begin ♪
♪ He just winked his eye and said, man, be cool ♪
- [Woman] How old are you?
- Seventeen.
♪ He wears a purple sash, and a black mustache ♪
♪ In a honky-tonk, down in Mexico ♪
(woman giggling)
- Don't be scared.
- [Karchy] I'm not.
♪ Around her waist she wore three fishnets ♪
♪ She started dancing with the castanets ♪
♪ I didn't know just what to expect ♪
- [Woman] Oh!
♪ She threw her arms around my neck ♪
♪ We started dancing all around the floor ♪
♪ And then she did a dance I never saw before ♪
♪ So if you're south of the border ♪
♪ I mean down in Mexico ♪
♪ And you want to get straight ♪
♪ Man, don't hesitate ♪
♪ Just look up a cat named Joe ♪
- [Woman] Unzip me.
♪ In a honky-tonk, down in Mexico ♪
♪ He wears a purple sash, and a black mustache ♪
♪ In a honky-tonk, down in Mexico ♪
♪ Come with me to the border, south of the border, that is ♪
♪ In Mexico, yeah, that's right, Mexico ♪
♪ You can get your kicks in Mexico ♪
♪ Come with me baby, come with me ♪
- [Woman] You're very gentle.
- Is that wrong?
- [Woman] No, no, that's good.
- He's gonna fall in love with you, darlin'.
- Night.
- Where's she going?
- I'll see you in the morning, kid.
Take my car, pick me up.
- Thanks.
- Don't mention it.
(upbeat music)
(car honks)
- I did it!
- Have you gone screwy, what's the matter with you?
Holy Jesus, look at that car.
- I got laid.
- Would you be quiet?
Wait, where you going?
- Oh, I'm all burned out.
Come on, let's get goin', we got 20 minutes to air.
So how'd you like her?
Ha ha ha, he liked her.
The kid liked her.
Yeah, you better have liked her.
She cost me a dick and a leg.
- What?
- Paid her, man.
She's a vice doll.
Oh grow up, Chucky.
It don't matter how you get it as long as you get it.
But you know that already don't you, Slick?
- [Croak] So how was it?
I gotta know.
I want to know what I'm in for.
- She said I was very gentle.
- Gentle?
You're not supposed to be gentle, I read about that.
- Oh, Jesus.
I got to stop and talk to her.
- What do you want to talk to her for?
Come on, let's get out of here.
- [Karchy] Just wait right here.
Hey, Diney!
- [Croak] Karch, where you going?
- [Karchy] Diney.
Hey, Diney, where you going?
- [Diney] To the laundromat.
- [Karchy] I can drive you.
- [Diney] I can walk.
- I'm not going to hurt you or nothing.
You want to go get an ice cream cone?
He's got a guilty conscience.
- How come you don't?
- I do.
- I don't want nothing to drink.
- [Karchy] Are you done?
- [Diney] Mm-hmm.
("Lonely Teardrops" by Jackie Wilson)
- [Karchy] So, you read that book I gave you?
- [Diney] Mm-hmm.
- You read Huckleberry Finn?
- Mm-hmm, I liked it.
You really want to be a writer?
- I want to be something, that's the truth.
- They can probably teach you to be one at Princeton.
- I'm not really going to Princeton.
- You're not?
- I make things up sometimes.
Listen, will you drive somewhere with me?
- What for?
- I want to show the car off.
I want to show you off.
- Why do you gotta show off so much?
- 'Cause I ain't got that much to show.
♪ Just give me another chance ♪
♪ For our romance ♪
- Let's go.
- [Karchy] Can you move closer to me?
- [Diney] What for?
- [Karchy] It looks better that way.
♪ That you've been gone away ♪
♪ You know my heart does nothing but burn ♪
(car honks)
- [Karchy] Hey, Kevin!
♪ My pillow's never dry of lonely teardrops ♪
- [Blind Kid] Wish I could see it.
- [Amos] There you go again.
- I do, it feels real nice.
- Collection time, ladies and gentles.
- Hey, we finished that tune, you want to come check it out?
- Sure, when?
- Can you bring Mr. Magic?
- I don't know, I'll talk to him.
- I mean, you're such good friends with him and all.
- You better watch your fancy coat.
- I'm sorry, Karch Ass.
- Man, hit him.
- You want to hit me, Karch Ass?
Come on, hit me.
- [Father Norton] What's going on here?
- It was an accident.
He bumped into me, Father.
- Bullshit!
- Please don't act as if you were
in your own home, Mr. Smith.
- I'll pay for the dry cleaning, Father.
- Send your bill to Mr. Boyle, Mr. Jonas.
- [Karchy] He said the garage.
- [Billy] This sure is the dark side of town.
This kid better be a real good friend of yours.
♪ She comes walkin' down the street ♪
♪ Lookin' good enough to eat ♪
♪ Big brown eyes and wavy hair ♪
♪ That's my baby, medium rare ♪
♪ Medium rare ♪
♪ Come around 'bout supper time ♪
♪ I think I'm gonna get me a jug of wine ♪
♪ My mama's callin' but I don't care ♪
♪ I'm-a go see medium rare ♪
♪ When she wears that little skirt ♪
♪ All the fellas start to flirt ♪
♪ They say, hey, what's under there ♪
♪ Under there ♪
♪ If you're in my neighborhood ♪
♪ Lookin' around for somethin' good ♪
♪ If you see her, stop and stare ♪
♪ But don't you dare touch medium rare ♪
♪ Medium rare ♪
♪ No don't you dare ♪
♪ She's my baby, medium rare ♪
What do you think?
- I think you could have it out in a week.
Another three weeks you'd be top 10.
I can get you a record deal.
You'll need some clothes, though.
I'll give you the money.
- What?
Why are you doing this for us?
- I like your music, man.
It's hungry, full of spit.
Partners?
- Partners.
- [Billy] All right, Chucky man, I'll see you tomorrow.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do.
- [Karchy] See ya, Billy.
- [Henry] We're closed.
- I thought maybe I could walk you home.
- Yeah, well, I'm actually driving her home.
- I kind of feel like walking, Henry.
- Suit yourself.
(gentle music)
- [Karchy] He's gonna get him a record deal.
Thinks he can be top 10.
- [Diney] You're not blowing smoke again, are you?
- [Karchy] I'm serious, it's a great song.
You'll hear it on the radio.
Really, stuff like that can happen.
- [Diney] In books.
- In real life.
All you got to do is believe.
- All I gotta do is stay on my feet
and not piss Henry off too much.
- Screw Henry, he's a nook.
- Don't talk to me like that.
- I'm sorry.
- And he is not.
- He is, too.
You don't really like him do you?
- [Diney] He wants me to marry him.
- [Karchy] He wants you to marry him?
He's a dip.
- [Diney] He's not such a dip.
- [Karchy] You're not going to do it, are you?
- [Diney] I don't think so.
- [Karchy] Good.
- [Diney] My feet hurt.
- [Karchy] You want some ice for them?
- [Diney] (laughs) No.
I gotta feed my goldfish.
- [Karchy] I'll see you later, Diney.
- [Diney] Night, Karchy.
- [Karchy] Good night.
(students chattering)
(moves into uplifting music)
- Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.
It's been three days since my last confession.
The reason I'm here again, Father,
you know what it is.
I just can't stop doing it.
I get these thoughts and I can't keep my hands off it.
Father, are you there, Father?
- [Karchy] Mm-hmm.
- I know you said I was gonna go blind, Father.
I don't want to go blind.
Last night I did it three times.
I'm doin' it so much it hurts when I touch it.
And I want to kill my dad again.
I can't take it anymore.
I hate him.
I hate him, Father.
I just can't stand watching him hit my mom.
- [Father Norton] Mr. Jonas, get out of there!
Take that off.
How dare you!
Out, just get out.
You've gone too far this time, too far.
What he did was a sacrilege, Mr. Jonas.
- His name is Dr. Jonas.
- Karchy, please.
- I'm suspending him from school
for the 10 days that are left, Dr. Jonas.
What I really should do is not let him graduate.
- No, no, please, please.
- We'll give him his diploma.
But he can't come to the graduation ceremonies.
- [Istvan] Thank you.
- We'll mail the diploma here.
- [Istvan] How kind of you, thank you.
- I never want to see you again.
- [Istvan] Why do you do such trouble?
Now I cannot go to see you graduate.
I come to America for this.
- [Karchy] I don't care, I hate the place, Pop.
- [Karchy] This is good school.
Rich sons go to this school.
- [Karchy] I'm not a rich son.
- [Istvan] I pay lots of money.
I work at the mill, so what?
You learn same things like rich sons.
- This place is different, Pop.
This ain't like the old country.
- How different?
- This place ain't fair.
- What do you mean?
You will be citizen soon.
Maybe you will be okay, you pass test.
You'll work hard.
You'll study hard.
You will pass test.
You cannot fail.
You will be citizen.
You got to be citizen.
I help.
You make me hurt.
♪ That's my baby, medium rare ♪
♪ Medium rare, medium rare ♪
- Hey, demo sounds good, doesn't it?
'Course I'll make sure it gets plenty of air time.
That way the record company
won't take it out back and burn it.
What's the matter with you?
- I got thrown out of school.
(Billy laughs)
- What difference does it make, man,
they're still gonna let you graduate, right?
Still gonna give you your diploma.
- Right.
- So what you going to do next year, go to college?
- I don't know.
- Why don't you go to broadcasting school?
- Duh.
- Aw, when I first started out
I came from this little town called Del Rio, Texas.
Talked like my mouth was full of cow chips
and cream gravy, sayin' howdy all the time.
They fixed me up in broadcasting school.
I developed my own slanguage.
- I don't have the money for broadcasting school.
- Well, I can talk to some guys, I'll get you in.
Hey, did you try that rubber band on the tongue?
What happened?
- It hurt, that's what happened.
(Billy laughs)
♪ If you're in my neighborhood ♪
♪ Lookin' around for somethin' good ♪
♪ If you see her, stop and stare ♪
♪ But don't you dare touch medium rare ♪
♪ Medium rare ♪
♪ No, don't you dare touch medium rare ♪
♪ Don't you dare touch medium rare ♪
(crowd applauds) (crowd cheers)
- All right, let's hear it
for Blood Smith and the Tenderloins.
I love that song.
- Amos!
Almost missed you, man.
He's gonna make it his pick to click.
You're gonna be a millionaire.
- He's going to be a millionaire, not me.
- What do you mean?
Come on, Amos, you're my friend, tell me.
- You think we friends?
Just 'cause we sit at the same table?
Just 'cause nobody else want nothing to do with us.
You're a chump, and I'm one too.
- What are you talking about?
- It's Mr. Magic, he's taking 70%.
- [Karchy] What?
- It's in the record contract, man.
He's gettin' 70%.
- For what?
- For writing it with me.
- He didn't write it with you.
- I guess 30% is better than nothing.
- Where's Billy?
- You can't go in there, he's got people with him.
- I need to talk to you.
- Well, come on in, Charles.
- You're Mr. Jonas, aren't you?
- These boys are from the police.
They gonna ask us a few questions.
Fire away, gentlemen.
We've got nothing to hide.
- So, Dwayne.
Have you ever taken any money
for playing a record on the air?
- Hell no.
- Have you ever accepted any favors
for playing a record on the air?
- Hell no.
- [Detective] Never?
- Now, what is this?
You boys got something to say, say it.
If you're going on a fishin' expedition,
don't use my pecker.
- Has anybody ever given you anything to give to Mr. Magic?
- What do you mean?
- Has anybody ever given you any money
to give to Mr. Magic for playing a record?
- No.
- Kid, you ever hear the word payola?
These disc jockeys making illegal deals
with the record companies to play their songs on the radio.
Only they don't report that money.
They're stealing that money from Uncle Sam.
Millions of dollars.
Your Mr. Magic here is on the receiving end of that.
- Oh, what is it with you guys?
You're shouting down the wrong hole.
You can't do nothing to him, he's 17.
He's a juvenile.
- I heard you gentlemen were here.
Is there some sort of problem?
- No Cecil, I don't have a problem, unless maybe they do.
Goddamn demons.
Came down on me when I was in Savannah, too.
They couldn't find nothing there and they went away.
Oh, hey.
I forgot to give you your bonus, Slick.
- I don't want it.
- What's the matter, man?
Don't you want to be a millionaire?
- I don't want it.
- Suit yourself.
- Amos told me.
- What did Amos tell you?
- About the record contract.
- Yeah, it's a good deal.
Takes more than divine intervention to make a hit record.
- It isn't fair.
- Now, you think that boy could have
got himself a contract without me?
Let me tell you something,
sepia music ain't nothing without me.
You don't like it, don't let the door
hit you in the ass on your way out.
- What about the envelopes Hogan had me give you?
- I don't remember no envelopes.
Come on, man, I told you, ain't got nothing to worry about.
You're underage, they can't do nothing to you.
You never gave me no envelopes, you understand?
- What did you do it for?
You got a lot of money.
You got everything.
- Who, me?
I ain't got nothing, man.
I got two ex-wives and four kids.
I got a leased Cadillac and a rented apartment.
Everything you see is paid for by the record promoters.
I've been in four cities in five years,
I'm gonna be in a whole lot more.
I ain't got a tin can to shit in.
- [Istvan] Hello, Karchy, someone here to see you.
- Hello, Mr. Jonas.
Why don't you take a seat?
We're here to tell you about your Mr. Magic.
We checked him out, it seems every place he works
he picks some boy about your age to take his money for him.
That way no one can ever testify that they gave him money.
You see, they gave his kid money.
It's real cute.
He always picks a kid real carefully, too.
He always makes sure he picks
some kid he knows will lie for him.
- And the kids think he's the greatest
thing since sliced bread anyway.
And he makes sure he pays them good.
- How did you meet him, anyhow?
- He get diploma.
- [Detective] What diploma was that?
- There.
- [Detective] Oh, where'd you get this?
- Billy Magic Hall of Fame.
The students vote for him and send
postcards, sign names, very popular.
- [Detective] Cleveland Latin,
that's a rich kid's school, isn't it?
- Very expensive, lots of money.
- [Detective] How'd you get to be so popular?
Bunch of rich kids, kid like you.
- You sent those postcards in yourself, didn't you, son.
You forged the kids' names.
- Magic knew it.
He figured you'd be perfect for him.
- That's why he gave you the job.
- No, he's my friend, he helped me.
- [Detective] Help with what?
- With all kinds of stuff.
- [Detective With Mustache] He used you.
- [Detective] He used you, son.
- No, he didn't.
- [Detective] You took money for him, didn't you, kid?
- No.
- Your father tells us you're taking
your naturalization test soon, isn't that right, Mr. Jonas?
- Yes, we will be American citizen.
- [Detective With Mustache] I hope you pass.
- What do you mean?
- [Detective With Mustache] It's up to the judge.
What if he rejects you?
(flames whooshing)
(Karchy knocking)
- Listen, can I come in?
- [Diney] Karchy, it's late.
- I know.
I just want to talk to you, please.
- [Diney] Okay.
- I'm all screwed up, Diney.
- What's the matter?
- I got thrown out of school.
- What for?
- It doesn't matter.
The hell with that.
It's just everything.
I need you to be my friend, Diney.
I need a friend.
- You ever had a girl for a friend before?
- I don't know any other girls except you.
I'm sorry.
- It's okay.
(gentle music)
- [Karchy] I didn't think this would ever happen.
I mean that's not, I'm sorry.
God, I keep saying that to you.
- It's okay.
- [Karchy] I love you.
- It's okay.
It really is.
- I mean, I like you very much.
More than I've ever liked anyone before.
- I know.
Someday you're going to make a terrific man, Karchy Jonas.
Delayed reaction.
- What?
- That darn Spanish fly.
Me and Henry got engaged.
(egg trays crashing)
- And so as we say goodbye to each other,
to old friends, and set forth to greet new ones,
may we never forget the lessons
we have all pledged to live by.
The power of will, compassion, and truth.
The brothers of Cleveland Latin High have shown us
not only how to survive in the outside world,
but how to survive--
(music drowns out speech)
I'll never forget this place.
- Karchy?
You got some mail over there.
What is it?
- There's a hearing in front of the grand jury tomorrow.
- What you gonna tell, hmm?
Karchy.
I want to be American citizen.
Don't destroy everything, hmm?
(pounding)
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, hold on.
- You son of a bitch!
- (chuckles) Damn, where'd you learn how to fight?
You want a beer?
- I don't want a goddamn beer.
- Suit yourself, I'm gonna have one.
- You're gonna do the right thing
and tear it up, that's what you're gonna do.
- No, I'm not.
I'm gonna drink my beer.
- The contract, Amos contract.
You're gonna tear it up.
You're not getting any percent.
- You want to bet?
- [Karchy] It's a subpoena.
- Oh yeah, I got one just like it.
- I meant nothing to you, did I?
You don't give a shit, do you?
- Hell no.
- I'm through lying.
(gentle music)
Diney.
- [Diney] Just give me a minute.
- I had to see you.
Jesus, Diney.
I loved that guy, Billy Magic.
He made me feel worth something.
Nobody told me it was gonna be this hard.
I mean, ever since you're little,
they tell you all kinds of stuff.
Why don't they tell you that?
- I don't know.
They don't want to scare you.
I better go, Henry's waiting for me.
You were the one who broke the eggs last night.
- I still love you, you know.
- [Diney] Goodbye.
- See ya.
(car honks)
- [Amos] Man, I knew I'd find you here.
Come on, let's get out of this funky neighborhood.
- I have to be somewhere.
- The courthouse.
I know all about it, Mr. Magic told me, man.
Hey, man, we're doin' a gig in Detroit.
We're going to be on the charts, man.
- That's great.
- We got a new contract.
Magic don't get nothing.
We got a hundred percent.
He says to give that to you.
He said it's a gift from your friend.
- It's too late, Amos.
I don't care, he's not my friend.
- [Man] Mr. Jonas?
- [Lawyer] What were your duties at WHK?
- [Karchy] I helped Billy
at the station and at the record hops.
- Mr. Jonas, during your employment at WHK
did you ever see anyone give Mr. Magic sums of money?
Did anyone ever give you any money to give to Mr. Magic?
- No, but.
- But what, Mr. Jonas?
- But I got some envelopes to give to Billy.
- And who gave you those envelopes to give to Mr. Magic?
Who gave you those envelopes to give to Mr. Magic?
Mr. Jonas, who gave you those
envelopes to give to Mr. Magic?
Mr. Jonas, you took an oath here
to tell the truth and nothing but the truth.
- I know it.
- You have your naturalization hearing coming up, don't you?
Do you understand me?
Who gave you those envelopes to give to Mr. Magic?
- The...
Holy shit, I said it.
- What?
- The, I said the.
- Who gave you those envelopes to give to Mr. Magic?
- The mailman.
The mailman gave me the envelopes.
Every afternoon the mailman will bring the mail
and I would take the mail from the mailman
and give the envelopes to Billy.
The mailman, that's the truth.
How you doin', Billy?
- What'd you tell them?
- The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
So help me God.
- Say it again.
- The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
- Jesus Christ, you said it! (laughs)
- Nothing happened, that's what I told them.
Amos told me about the contract.
- Get in, I'll buy you a beer.
- [Karchy] No thanks, man.
- Get in, will ya?
Come on, I'll let you drive.
- I'm gonna take the bus.
- What the hell do you want to take a bus for
when you can ride in a Cadillac car?
- Because I don't have a license.
- I don't care.
- I do.
- Hey, I talked to some guys,
I can get you into broadcasting school,
it's not gonna cost you nothing.
- I don't want to go to broadcasting school.
- What the hell are you going to do?
- I'm gonna get a job, save up some money.
Maybe go to school.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do.
I'm going to do something.
- You're a real killer stud, Slick.
That's what you are.
- Thanks, Billy.
Hey, you take care of yourself.
- [Karchy] When was the Declaration of Independence signed?
- 1776.
The Habsburg still got Hungary.
- Who were the Pilgrims?
- Refugees, like you and me.
- Who was Benedict Arnold?
- Spy, traitor, goddamn Russian.
(Karchy laughs)
What's the matter, I know answer.
You tell jury everything?
What gonna happen Magic?
- I don't know.
I think they're gonna execute him.
- Shoot? - Sure.
Isn't that what they did in the old country?
- (chuckles) You are American already.
You really tell them everything, Karchy?
(detectives whispering)
What they want?
- Alright, alright.
Mr. Jonas?
- Yeah?
- [Judge] Who are you?
- He's Dr. Jonas.
He's a PhD in law from Pazmany Peter University, Budapest.
He's my father.
- I'd like to see your son in chambers, Dr. Jonas.
- We're together, Karchy, go.
- Okay, Papa.
- [Istvan] Go.
- You passed the written test, Mr. Jonas.
But there are some people who don't want you
and your father to become citizens.
So I have to make a very hard decision.
I am going to give you a very special
naturalization test, Mr. Jonas.
Tell me the story about George Washington
and the cherry tree.
You do know the story, don't you, Mr. Jonas?
- George Washington. - Yes?
- He cut down this tree.
- Yes?
- They asked him if he did it.
And he said, yes, I cut the tree.
I cannot tell a lie.
- Do know the story about George Washington
and the Rappahannock River?
George Washington threw a stone all the way
across the Rappahannock River.
That's a distance of 2 3/4 miles.
Do you believe that, Mr. Jonas?
- No. - You don't.
You believe he owned up to cutting the cherry tree?
- No.
- You don't believe it?
- No, that's the truth.
- You're damn right, I don't either.
- [Crowd] I pledge allegiance to the flag
of the United States of America
and to the republic for which it stands
one nation, under God, indivisible,
with liberty and justice for all.
(crowd applauds)
- [Billy] Freight train on rail, baby.
Billy Lightning is gonna wail.
Just between me and you and the big city of Kalamazoo.
(upbeat music)