[eerie music]
[shoes clicking]
[dramatic music]
- Hello, I'm famished.
I haven't had supper for two weeks.
- Well, I'll be glad to give you some money for food.
- Can't keep food down, never could.
- I'll do anything I can to help you.
[tense music]
- Anything?
Oh, thank you.
[dramatic music]
[tense music]
May I be permitted to introduce myself?
My name is Eramus.
I am a vampire.
Oh, but of course, you know that.
- I say, what happened your fangs.
- Oh they're retractable when not in use.
- Oh, it's all right, I didn't bite deep.
You won't become one of us.
It was the best blood I have ever tasted.
Mm, and from such a noble source.
You are the great R. Chetwynd-Hayes,
the writer of those magnificent horror stories.
You are my favorite author.
- I wouldn't have thought you needed to read horror stories.
- Oh, my dear sir, you do yourself an injustice.
Everybody likes to read about themselves
and their own kind.
- Yes, well I'm glad to have been of help to you.
I'm glad you like my blood, uh, my books,
but I must be on my way.
- Oh no, I can't hear of such a thing.
- You want more of my blood?
- No, no, no, you misunderstand me.
I owe you something.
I want to help you, to repay you.
- No, it's quite all right thank you very much.
I'm glad to have been of service.
- Well, I can get you material for your next book.
- Material, what sort of material?
- I will take you to a place where my friends forgather.
There are vampires, werewolves, ghouls,
every kind of monster you could ever imagine
and some far beyond the imagining of mere mortals.
There you will find stories of such blood-curdling terror
that it will make your toes curl
and your hair reach up towards the sky.
- Where is this place?
- It's just a short distance.
It's called the Monster Club.
["Monsters Rule O.K." by the Viewers]
♪ Every night on the streets ♪
♪ When all the people are fast asleep ♪
♪ From every corner creeps ♪
♪ The shape of something you wouldn't like to meet ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Another sinister night ♪
♪ Another vampire girl to give me hot love bites ♪
♪ Down at the Monster Club ♪
♪ A zombie and a ghoul can do the monster dub ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
- Wolfgang, my table, please.
Wolfgang.
I'll have the usual.
- I'm afraid, type B is off, sir.
- Then I'll have to make do with common type O.
- Mm.
If I may suggest, sir, tomato juice.
It will look less conspicuous.
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ I'm Dr. Frankenstein's creation ♪
♪ I good-lookin' in the monster nation ♪
♪ Mr. Werewolf wants to meet you ♪
♪ He's waiting for the moon to greet you ♪
♪ Sister Snake with a poison touch ♪
♪ Wants to catch you in a midnight crush ♪
♪ Got a friend you know you can trust ♪
♪ He's a fiend and he's one of us ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
[monsters cheering]
[mellow music]
- Thank you, Wolfgang.
Now, this is pleasant enough, but it doesn't sustain us.
To get real nourishment,
we have to take our food directly from the source,
and it becomes more difficult constantly.
People are so well-educated these days.
It's all those horror films and television.
Everybody knows about garlic and stakes through the heart.
- Yes, we all have our cross to bear.
- I'd rather you didn't use that word.
- What's this?
- Oh, that's a monster's genealogical chart.
You see, first we have the primate monsters,
vampires, werewolves, and ghouls.
Now, a vampire and a werewolf would produce a werevamp,
but a werewolf and a ghoul would produce a weregoo,
but a vampire and a ghoul would produce a vamgoo.
A weregoo and a werevamp would produce a shaddy.
Now, a weregoo and a vamgoo would produce a maddy,
but a werevamp and a vamgoo would produce a raddy.
Now, if shaddy were to mate with a raddy or a maddy,
the result would be a mock.
- A mock?
- Frankly, that's just the polite name for a mongrel.
You know, it's, it's quite simple really.
All you have to do
is remember the basic rules of monsterdom.
Vampires suck, werewolves hunt, ghouls tear,
shaddies lick, maddies yawn, mocks blow,
but shadmocks only whistle.
- Shadmocks?
- If a mock were to mate with any of the other hybrids,
their offsprings would be called shadmocks.
- And they only whistle.
- Well, they don't do it very often.
- [R] Doesn't sound too terrifying.
- Oh, but you should see
the results of a shadmock's whistling.
Shadmocks are the lowest in the monster hierarchy,
yet they have this power.
- What happens when a shadmock whistles?
- I heard of a man once
who saw the results of a shadmock's whistle.
That's all he saw, and yet,
and yet.
[eerie music]
- He's been like that for the past six months.
If we only knew what was going on behind those staring eyes,
we might be able to help him.
He was found extraordinary and inexplicable circumstances.
[upbeat music]
♪ Ah ♪
- [Angela] Anything?
- Nothing of use to us.
[Angela sighs]
- Maybe we ought to look for proper jobs.
- And be slaves all our lives?
No, what we need's the big one, one big break,
someone we can take for all he's worth.
With enough money, we might even get married.
Oh now, here's something.
♪ I felt a vampire's ♪
- Antiquary requires secretary
to help catalog collection and prepare new book.
Some of those old fools
have got stuff that's worth thousands,
gold, melt it down, untraceable.
- Not very likely.
- He's offering enough money.
Hmm?
Umbrick House.
[gentle music]
[birds chirping]
[bells jingling]
[tense music]
[shoes clicking]
[bells jingling]
Mr. Raven?
I'm Angela, Angela Jones.
I wrote to you about your advertisement.
- Yes, of course, please do, do come in.
My study is this way.
[clock chiming]
- So many things.
- They all have to be cataloged.
Before we begin, there's something I must tell you.
Some people find me difficult,
um, impossible to work for.
- Why, do you beat up your secretaries?
- No, nothing like that.
I, I pride myself on being a very easy taskmaster.
It's just.
[suspenseful music]
- I'm sorry.
[tense music]
I can't do it.
- [George] Why, did he turn you down?
- He wanted me, all right,
and the house is full of good stuff, but the way he looked,
there was something terrifying about him.
- Full of good stuff?
- I'm not going back.
[tense music] [bells jingling]
- You came back.
- Ooh, why don't you get someone to clean this place.
- I can't.
I, I can't ask people to come here.
You have no idea how hard it was for me to,
to advertise for you.
- Why?
- Well, I must never go near people.
I can never go outside these grounds.
- Aren't you ever lonely?
[Raven chuckles]
- If only you knew the agony of my loneliness.
Uh, some of my relation will visit me from time to time,
but they're different.
- But why can't you go out?
- Well, there's all the noise, the traffic,
I might--
- Might what?
[tense music]
[sullen music]
[tense music]
- I didn't mean to frighten them.
- They're my only friends.
Soon, they'll, they'll learn to get to know you.
Soon, they'll accept you as a friend.
- Well, I must get to work.
- I've always been fascinated by the things of the dead.
[sullen music]
It's probably something to do with my ancestry.
And the living have always.
[peaceful music]
I used to wear a mask once,
but it was no use.
It just made people curious.
They had to see what was underneath, and then,
much better to get over the shock right at the beginning.
Then they might even grow accustomed.
You should always have flowers, masses of flowers.
You should always be surrounded with flowers.
- The birds will expect their breakfast.
- Oh yes, yes, you're right.
I mustn't neglect my other friends.
You have no idea what meeting you has meant to me.
- What are you playing at?
What's going on?
- Let's forget it, chuck the whole thing in.
- Are you afraid of him?
You said yourself he was a weakling, what can he do?
- I don't know.
- Look, at least get hold of something,
so I can see what sort of stuff he's go, get it valued.
- I don't like it!
- You in love with him or something?
- No.
He terrifies me.
And yet.
[peaceful music]
[tense music]
- No!
[Raven whistling]
[Angela screams]
[tense music]
[Raven panting]
[Raven whimpering]
- This sort of stuff's almost impossible to fence.
It's too specialized,
and we'd need a ton of it for the meltdown value
to be worth anything at all.
- So, we give up?
- No.
We've invested too much to chuck it in now.
- But it is no use.
- He almost certainly pays for that stuff in cash.
He must have a safe somewhere to keep it handy.
Probably keeps some of the small
really valuable articles in there too.
Has he come out of his room yet?
- I haven't seen him for days.
- Good, then you'll have plenty of opportunity
to look for the safe.
[gentle music]
[birds chirping]
[gentle music]
- Angela, look.
It used to belong to Princess Sahuya.
She was said to be the most beautiful woman of her day.
That was some 3,000 years ago.
Sahuya must have had your coloring.
It matches your eyes, your skin, beautiful.
[lock clicking]
- You should keep all those things in the bank.
- Oh.
I don't like banks.
You have to see people.
No, my things are much better
here with me.
Angela, will you marry me?
Well, I realize my appearance and everything,
but you could still love me.
- But we've got it all planned.
[Angela sobbing]
- I can't do it to him.
- Oh, don't worry, everything will be all right.
Just remember the plan.
Play along with him.
Get him to give you the ring as an engagement present,
and then remember the combination when he opens the safe.
- Oh, you've made me so very, very happy.
Of course, you may have the ring.
It's only fitting it should adorn
a living hand after so many centuries.
And such a beautiful hand.
[Raven panting]
I, I have something of a confession I must make to you.
I am a, a shadmock.
I don't suppose you know what that is.
If I ever whistle,
well, I must never whistle,
no matter what happens.
Oh, you must meet some of my relations.
They can explain the situation to you
much better than I ever can.
We could have a party, an engagement party.
It can be in fancy dress.
Everyone can wear masks.
My relations are a bit much to take all at once.
That way, you can have a chance
to get used to them gradually.
- I like dressing up.
- Well, in spite of my relations, in spite of everything,
you could still love me.
[peaceful music]
It is a crime to hide such beauty,
but here we must all be masked.
My love, may I present my Great Uncle Uriah.
Great Uncle, may I present
my bride to be, Miss Angela Jones.
[dramatic music]
[peaceful music]
[light orchestral music]
[Angela screams]
The money and the other things, they don't matter to me.
Take them.
Do what you want with them.
Give them to whomsoever you please.
But you could still love me.
- No, no, no.
Don't touch me.
That's all I've wanted from you.
- Don't say that.
You mustn't say that.
- I could never love you.
[Angela panting]
You're horrible.
- No.
- Horrible.
[Angela screams]
I could never love you, never, you're horrible!
[Raven whistles]
[tense music]
[heels clicking]
[lock clicking]
- Well, did you get it?
[music intensifies]
- You could still love me.
You could still love me.
[dramatic music]
Love
me.
[sullen music]
[Raven sobbing]
["Sucker For Your Love" by B. A. Robertson]
- There is nothing sadder the agonized grief
of a tenderhearted monster.
[singer slurping]
They're playing my song.
[singer slurping]
- Hey, fix me a drink and make it a Bloody Mary.
Don't forget to spike it.
Play my favorite record, You're So Vain.
You come from Pennsylvania, I'm from Transylvania,
and I'm a pain in the neck.
♪ She's the kind of girl ♪
♪ To drive a man insane ♪
♪ I think I love her so ♪
♪ And I give her pain ♪
♪ Good golly, I'm fate ♪
♪ But she's the one I rate ♪
♪ She's just the kind of girl ♪
♪ I love to punctuate ♪
♪ When I kiss and I fondle her ♪
♪ I'm makin' love to a colander ♪
♪ I said, I'm just a sucker for your love ♪
♪ I'm just a sucker for your love ♪
♪ Ah ah ah for your love ♪
♪ When I take her out ♪
♪ Just to have a drink ♪
♪ Baby, there's no doubt ♪
♪ That you tend to sprinkle ♪
♪ Almost on the bar ♪
♪ People near or far ♪
♪ They can borrow you ♪
♪ When they wash their cars ♪
♪ Just hang me in the garden, man ♪
♪ I said, well, you could use her as a watering can ♪
♪ Ah ah, I'm just a sucker for your love ♪
♪ I'm just a sucker for your love ♪
♪ Ah ah ah ah for your love ♪
♪ I'm just a sucker for [slurping] ♪
♪ I'm just a sucker for your love ♪
♪ Love ♪
♪ For your love ♪
♪ I'm just a sucker for your love ♪
♪ Ah ah ah ah for your love ♪
[monsters cheering and applauding]
[monsters yelling]
- [Monster] Boo!
Boo!
- The club secretary.
[monsters yelling]
- Hello monsters!
Please, silence, for tonight's guest of honor,
the great vampire film producer,
Lintom Busotsky.
[monsters cheering]
- A vampire film producer?
- Well, aren't they all?
- It's a great honor for me to be invited here tonight
to show you an excerpt from my latest film.
It is, I assure you, a picture very close to my heart,
for it's based on my own childhood, but in a modern setting.
- Lower budget.
- I was born and brought up here in London.
I can't say I, um, ever felt the urge
to follow in my father's profession.
You see, he was a night worker.
He spent the daylight hours asleep.
He needed peace and quiet.
But as a naturally shy child,
I too was glad we lived in a secluded house
and avoided our neighbors.
But even the shyest children must go to school.
My mother, may the earth lay lightly on her bones,
was always determined that I should look my best.
[sullen music]
- Now, remember what I've told you.
Never speak to strangers.
- I'll remember.
[sullen music]
[children chattering]
[haunting music]
- Ah yes, ah, ah, watch this.
[Manford chuckles]
- Now Manford, you must hurry,
or you'll miss the 5:30 from Oxford Circus.
- Oh, all right, yes, you're quite right, my dear.
- Your business is so messy.
I shouldn't like to think of you
being mistaken for a butcher.
[light violin music]
- Daddy, I wish you could play with me during the day.
- You know, I work during the night.
I must get my sleep.
- Are you a waiter?
- Oh, [chuckles] no, my son, I am not a waiter,
but I suppose I do have something to do with the food trade.
- What do you do?
- I lighten the burden of those who have too much
and receive certain nutritional benefits in return,
a nip and a suck [chuckles] and they never feel a thing.
Feed without greed, that has always been my slogan.
The rush hour trains and the after theater crowds
provide a rich harvest for someone who knows his business.
But I must always be on the lookout for the bleaney.
[mother gasps]
The beast squad.
Beware of men carrying violin cases.
- I do not think, dear,
there's any need to reveal the problems of your profession.
- You're right dear.
- A gentleman does not mix his business and home life.
Sufficient for Lintom to know that he has an unusual father.
- Who loves his family very much. [laughs]
Home at seven, hmm.
[sullen music]
[children cheering]
- What have we got here?
- [Tall Student] This shrimp.
- [Student With Long Hair] The thing.
- The weird.
- Bet you can't do that.
- Of course, he can't.
- Coward.
- Weird.
- Isn't he pale?
- Sickening.
You daren't do that.
- Cry baby.
- Weird.
[children laughing]
[tense music]
[whistle blows]
- Now, you mustn't worry
about those horrid children teasing you.
See, you must remember that you are better than they are.
Back in the old country, where we came from,
your father was a nobleman.
He's a count, which means, of course, that I am a countess.
Well then, you must be a viscount.
[children chattering]
- I don't care, I'm better than all of you!
I'm a viscount!
- What did you say?
- I said, I'm a viscount.
- My lord.
- [Tall Student] Your grace.
- You thing.
- Weird.
- Children, what's going on here?
Oh oh, come on, I'll uh, I'll walk home with you
and see that they don't harm you.
Merciful heavens, why not?
- My mother told me never to speak to strangers.
- But I'm not a stranger, I'm a clergyman.
Would you like a caramel?
- No, thank you.
I can't let anyone come to my home.
- Why not?
- I don't know.
- There must be a reason.
- I think my father escaped from somewhere
in the middle of Europe.
Perhaps, he's hiding.
- Why were those limbs of Satan so angry with you?
- I said I was a viscount.
- Mm, is your father a nobleman?
- I hardly see my father.
He sleeps all day and goes out at night.
- Where does he sleep?
- Downstairs, I've never been there.
- Why don't you go down there one day?
He might wake up early and play with you.
Wait till your mother goes out, then she needn't know.
[Pickering chuckles]
[tense music]
- I'm just going to the shops, Lintom.
Now, you remember not to let anyone in while I'm away.
- I'll remember.
[door clicks]
[suspenseful music]
[light string music]
[tense music]
[Lintom gasps]
- Take us to your father.
- Leave me alone.
- Where is your father?
Come on!
- Who are you, what do you want?
- We are the beast squad, sonny, the bleaney,
special branch concerned with blood crimes.
We have sworn to eradicate
the curse of vampirism from this land.
- Sir.
[tense music]
It is getting dark.
- The boy said his father slept downstairs.
Look for a cellar.
Your father has been the most difficult case of my career.
I've hunted him for months.
He's been clever, very clever, but now, I've got him.
- Sir!
- No, you can't go down there, you can't!
- Take him down.
He should witness the end.
[tense music]
[music intensifies]
[mother screams]
[Manford screams]
[Manford groaning]
[Pickering screams]
[tense music] [Pickering groaning]
[peaceful string music]
What?
Don't just stand there, get an ambulance.
[mother laughing]
- You need more than an ambulance.
My husband didn't just take trickle or refreshment.
He bit deep.
Do you know what that means?
You are one of his kind now.
You will have to be staked by your own men.
- She's right, sir.
The virus is in you.
Come moonlight, you'll be on the rampage.
[head clops]
We'll have to do our duty, sir.
- You can't mean that, Sergeant.
You are talking to Pickering,
a departmental agent, head of the bleaney.
Why, I've staked over 2,000 vamps.
You can't mean to.
Oh, oh.
- Sir?
You wouldn't want us chasing you
through the underground, sir.
Wouldn't be respectful, sir.
Now then, if you could just see your way
to layin' out nice and flat like,
we'll have the old doings to your ticker in a jiffy.
Where would you be most comfortable, sir?
- No!
[suspenseful music]
[Pickering groans]
[Pickering screams]
[Pickering groaning]
- Watson.
The stretcher.
["Funeral March" by Frederic Chopin]
[wood cracks]
[sullen music]
[dramatic music]
[Manford groaning]
[Manford laughing]
- It's a good thing I always were this stake-proof vest.
[Manford laughing]
It's filled with tomato ketchup. [laughing]
[cheerful music]
Come!
The one thing you must learn in life, my darlings,
is you cannot be too careful, hmm?
Ah, such happy family.
[monsters applauding]
["The Stripper" by Night]
- Well, thank you for a very pleasant evening,
but I really must go.
- The entertainment is about to commence.
♪ Take a look around you ♪
♪ Someone might recognize you ♪
♪ It's not the type of place ♪
♪ You wanna bump into friends ♪
♪ I know what you came for ♪
♪ To watch me on the dance floor ♪
♪ May get what you paid for ♪
♪ A part of your dreams ♪
♪ But it's all right ♪
♪ Come on and see me every Saturday night ♪
♪ But it's all, all right ♪
♪ Don't know you ♪
♪ My hands along my thighs ♪
♪ You can't believe your eyes ♪
♪ My body hypnotizes ♪
♪ I'm a stripper ♪
♪ So, let the show begin ♪
♪ I'll show you everything ♪
♪ Oh, undo my safety pin ♪
♪ There's nothing you say ♪
♪ To take my pride away ♪
♪ I can be a lady and a stripper ♪
♪ I got abilities ♪
♪ Don't you look down on me ♪
♪ I can live without your dirty minds ♪
♪ Can you ♪
♪ Ha ♪
♪ Now, let me tell you why ♪
♪ You kissed your wife goodbye ♪
♪ You take a swig of brandy ♪
♪ And come here to me ♪
♪ Gettin' satisfaction ♪
♪ No negative reaction ♪
♪ I'm playing with body ♪
♪ That's what you wanna see ♪
♪ But it's all right ♪
♪ Come on and see me every Saturday night ♪
♪ But it's all, all right ♪
♪ Oh, don't you know ♪
♪ You men are all the same ♪
♪ Don't wanna know your name ♪
♪ Just come back again ♪
♪ And pay the stripper ♪
♪ So, let the show begin ♪
♪ I'll show you everything ♪
♪ Pullin' off the safety pin ♪
♪ I got abilities ♪
♪ Don't you look down on me ♪
♪ I only want your money ♪
♪ I'm a stripper ♪
♪ Don't try to understand ♪
♪ It's just that you're a man ♪
♪ And I'm a stripper ♪
- Beautiful bones, don't you think?
- Magnificent.
♪ But it's all right ♪
♪ Come on and see me every Saturday night ♪
♪ But it's all, all right ♪
♪ Oh, don't you know ♪
♪ My hands along my thighs ♪
♪ You can't believe your eyes ♪
♪ My body hypnotizes ♪
♪ I'm a stripper ♪
♪ So, let the show begin ♪
♪ I'll show you everything ♪
♪ Oh, undo my safety pin ♪
♪ There's nothing you can say ♪
♪ To take my pride away ♪
♪ I can be a lady and a stripper ♪
♪ I got abilities ♪
♪ Don't you look down on me ♪
♪ I can live without your dirty mind ♪
♪ But it's all right ♪
♪ Come on and see me every Saturday night ♪
♪ But it's all, all right ♪
♪ Whoa, I'm a stripper ♪
[monsters applauding]
- Eramus?
- Yes?
- That girl there at the bottom of the chart,
surely, she's not a monster.
- Well, no, that's a humgoo,
a cross between a ghoul and a human being.
As well as mating with each other,
monsters can also mate with humans beings.
The results are nearly always disastrous,
but they will do it.
- What do they do?
- Do?
- Well, do they whistle or anything like that?
- Humgoos?
Evil, hell no.
A part from an unfortunate appetite for carrion,
which they get from the ghoul side of the family,
they don't do anything interesting.
- Huh, I'm relieved to hear it.
- Oh, but their relations do have some fascinating habits.
One of them told me an intriguing story once.
It started with, you shall see,
you shall see.
[jazzy music]
[tense music]
[fire crackling]
[woman screams]
- Cut.
- Do you wanna go again?
- Oh, no, no, no, no, no, it's a wrap.
- Right, it's a wrap everyone, house lights!
- I want you to print three, 11, and 13.
I suppose I'll have to sort
the whole mess out in the cutting room, as usual.
- Ah, Sam, can you have a look at these
pictures of the new locations that we've found?
- Ah.
Where have you looked?
- Here, here, and here.
- Well, what's wrong with this area?
It looks far more remote, far more promising.
I wanna strange, eerie, lonely half-deserted village
in which to make an atmospheric horror film.
Now, do you really expect
to find such a place surrounded by a motorway,
a power station, and a group of five-star hotels?
I'll go out this weekend and I'll find the place myself.
[crew chattering]
[eerie music]
[tense music]
[wind howling]
[Sam knocking]
Yo!
Anyone here?
Innkeeper!
Ah.
I'd like to use your telephone.
- No telephone here.
- Well, perhaps you can help me.
You see, I'd like to use this village for a film.
A film for the cinema.
Well, whose permission do I need?
Who runs things around here?
- Run things?
The elders.
- Well, how do I contact them?
- They'll be here soon.
- Don't worry about it.
You see, I'll have my production office sort it all out.
I'll talk to my art director
when I get back to London tonight.
- You'll not get there tonight.
Too far, not safe go at night.
You stay here.
[tense music]
- Oh, this evil day.
[engine stuttering]
Who did this?
- Be them vermin, all right, be them vermin.
Real monsters, they are, nothing be safe.
- Can someone direct me to the nearest garage?
- Garage?
No garage.
- Well surely, you can suggest something.
- It soon be dark.
'Tain't safe in dark.
Stay here in Plath.
[music intensifies]
[Sam groaning]
[Sam sighs]
[tense music]
[eerie music]
- Dada say you eat this.
- What is it?
- Rabbit stew.
I cook.
- What's your name?
- Name?
You mean, how am I called?
- Yeah.
- Luna.
Dada is keeper of inn.
[Sam sighs]
Do all people on the outside wear clothes like yours?
- Outside?
We're only a couple of miles from the main highway.
An hour in my car would take you to a big city.
- These only clothes we have.
Only clothes in boxes.
No clothes like yours.
- Boxes?
- All come from boxes.
Dicken, who work with hands, make that from boxes.
- Well, where do you people get these boxes?
- In ground.
On gathering night, all come from boxes.
Clothes, wood, food, all from boxes.
No more boxes left now.
All gone.
I not like others.
I humgoo.
My mother, from outside.
When I born, she be put into box,
then dug up for great eating.
Dada say she caught in mist, like you and motorcar.
- Luna.
What are they gonna do with me?
You're gonna tell me, Luna.
You tell me what
they're gonna do me. - Luna no tell.
Dada beat me if I tell.
- Tell me, I'm not gonna let you go until you do.
- We must have our food.
[tense music]
- Luna, I need your help.
I've gotta get outta here.
- Hide there.
They not go in there.
Fall down if go in there.
- Can you go in there?
- I not like them, I humgoo.
Can go in.
I come when I can, help you.
- Thank you.
[dramatic music]
[eerie music]
[haunting vocalizing]
[tense music]
[eerie music]
[haunting vocalizing]
[eerie music]
- [Man] Almighty God, hear the prayer
of your miserable servant and grant me the power
to set down the unthinkable evil I have witnessed.
We should have destroyed the first one,
crushed it underfoot, burnt its foul carcass,
and tossed the ashes to the winds
as it squatted behind a tombstone and did jibber upon us.
But I, may I be forgiven,
did implore mercy for the creature.
I took it into my house and washed away the filth,
filth, the like of which
I had never before in my life beheld.
I clad it in clean raiment and laid it on soft bed.
Where did I sin, merciful God?
For should we not succor the afflicted, give good for evil?
Then one night when the moon was full, I saw it.
Cursed be the eyes that see, the ears that hear,
feeding in the churchyard, mud on the hands,
sitting on a pile of earth and gnawing, gnawing.
We chased it away, but for the one we drove away,
12 did return, and they danced around the village bounds
to mark the place for their own.
[haunting music]
Even as I write, I can hear the howls.
[tense music]
- [Innkeeper] Luna.
Luna.
- No.
No.
No, no!
[ghouls hissing]
[eerie music]
Dada beat me because I help you.
I not go back.
If you go, Luna be left here.
- That's nonsense.
When I escape, I want you to go with me
and live the life a pretty girl should.
- You take me outside?
I wear clothes like yours?
You really take me outside and ride on underground?
- Underground?
What do you know about the underground?
- Elders say there is much good eating underground.
[glass breaking]
[dramatic music]
Stone kill if hit head.
They caught many animals that way.
[ghouls hissing]
[eerie music]
- What will their next trick be?
- Nothing more.
They wait for elders to come for great eating.
Elders not like us.
Have much wisdom.
No escape when elders are here.
- When will they come?
- This night.
[suspenseful music]
- Run when I run and stay beside me.
[ghouls hissing]
[tense music]
- Follow, follow.
And stop them.
[suspenseful music]
[ghouls yelling]
- Mist, elders make, look.
[ghouls yelling]
[Luna screams]
[ghouls screaming]
[gentle music]
I hurt bad.
[Luna panting]
Back broke.
Like when Dada hit rabbit.
Rabbit die soon when back broke.
I die soon.
Never see outside.
Never wear pretty clothes.
- I'll go and get some help.
You'll be all right.
[traffic rumbling]
[Sam whistles]
There's a village, there's a village up there, a village of.
Well look, if you'll take me to the police station.
[tires screeching]
[tense music]
Where are you going?
This is the way to the.
Stop!
- Don't worry, sir, we saw.
The supply wagon will take care of it.
- Supply wagon?
- It's just behind that car.
[dramatic music]
You see, we always give the elders
a police escort when they return to Loughville.
[eerie music]
[dramatic music]
[ghouls grumbling]
[Sam screams]
[mellow music]
- A village of monsters?
- Well, it would make a good story, wouldn't it?
I mean, it's so moral.
No nudity, no sex,
a little violence perhaps, but [chuckles].
- Now really, I must go.
- Oh no, no, I've taken a liking to you.
- But you promised.
- Oh, no, no, no, I'm going to put you up for membership.
- But I'm not a monster.
- Nonsense, you're the greatest monster of them all.
[secretary grumbling]
Oh, Mr. Club Secretary, I want to propose my friend here
as a member of this august assembly.
- But he's a, he's, he's a hume!
- Yes, but can we truly call this a Monster Club
if we do not boast amongst our membership
a single member of the human race?
- [Monster] Nonsense!
[monsters yelling]
- [Monster In Green Dress] What can he do?
- What can he do?
In the past 60 years,
humes have exterminated over 150 million of their own kind.
No effort has been spared to reach this astronomical figure,
and the methods that they have used
must demand our unstinted admiration.
You know, humes began
with certain very serious disadvantages,
but these they overcame with wonderful ingenuity.
Not having a fang or a claw,
oh, or even a whistle worth talking about,
they invented guns and tanks and bombs and airplanes
and extermination camps and poison gas and daggers
and swords and bayonets and booby traps
and atomic bombs and flying missiles,
submarines, warships, aircraft carriers, and motorcars.
They have even perfected a process
whereby they can spread a lethal disease
on any part of this planet,
not to say anything about nuclear power. [laughs]
Oh, during their short history, you know,
humes have subjected other humes to death
by burning, hanging, decapitation, strangulation,
electrocution, shooting, drowning, crushing,
racking, disemboweling, hmm,
and other methods far, far too revolting
for the delicate stomachs of this august assembly.
- I never realized he was so talented.
- We don't like to boast.
- I second the proposal.
A member of such a talented race
can only be a credit to any Monster Club.
- [Monster] Ah, bravo, bravo!
[monsters cheering]
- Maestro, to celebrate the installation of a new member,
may we hear our song?
["The Monster Club" by the Pretty Things]
[monsters chattering]
♪ You read in books ♪
♪ About the things that chill the human heart ♪
♪ I was necking with my ghoulfriend ♪
♪ When she just snapped out the light ♪
♪ Saying, fangs for the memory ♪
♪ As she took a bigger bite ♪
[singer crunches]
♪ Then there's the blood ♪
♪ Blood ♪
♪ Welcome to the Monster Club ♪
♪ The Monster Club ♪
♪ You hear those hefty footsteps ♪
♪ Follow you down the hall ♪
♪ As you open door to your late night visitor ♪
♪ You really lose your cool ♪
♪ Whoa oh ♪
♪ When he borrows a spanner ♪
♪ To tighten his bolts ♪
♪ You feel such a fool ♪
♪ Then there's the blood ♪
♪ Blood ♪
♪ Welcome to the Monster Club ♪
♪ Oh yeah ♪
♪ Welcome to Monster Club ♪
♪ The Monster Club ♪
♪ Ow ♪
♪ There's a face at my window ♪
♪ As the darkness closes in ♪
♪ The door starts to creak ♪
♪ And scream for the night ♪
♪ There's a figure of the phantom ♪
♪ With a strange, twisted smile ♪
♪ Given these circumstances ♪
♪ You'd run a mile ♪
♪ Or two ♪
♪ Or three, ow ♪
♪ You feel so proud of being ♪
♪ Part of the human race ♪
♪ There's just a little sadness ♪
♪ Not much grief upon your face ♪
♪ Oh oh oh ♪
♪ You look into the mirror ♪
♪ There's a stake driven right through your heart ♪
♪ Then there's the blood ♪
♪ Blood ♪
♪ Welcome to the Monster Club ♪
♪ Oh yeah ♪
♪ Welcome to the Monster Club ♪
♪ Monster Club ♪
♪ Ow ♪
♪ Welcome to the Monster Club ♪
♪ The Monster Club, babe ♪
♪ Take a seat ♪
♪ Welcome to the Monster Club ♪
♪ The club ♪
♪ Welcome to the Monster Club ♪
["Monsters Rule O.K." by the Viewers]
♪ Every night on the streets ♪
♪ When all the people are fast asleep ♪
♪ From every corner creeps ♪
♪ The shape of something you wouldn't like to meet ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Another sinister night ♪
♪ Another vampire girl to give me hot love bites ♪
♪ Down at the Monster Club ♪
♪ A zombie and a ghoul can do the monster dub ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Monsters rule okay ♪
[peaceful music]