it's been over two years
since i've uploaded a video to this
channel and there's a lot of reasons for
that let me start off by
giving you a synopsis in the time since
i released my last video
i've dealt with three lawsuits various
health issues the worst of which that i
broke my back losing my dog max
california fires where i was evacuated
from my house
my grandma died three friends of mine
committed suicide
ever encroaching youtube [ __ ]
i was hacked and my long-term girlfriend
broke up with me among a few other
things i've always tried to avoid
talking about personal things on this
channel
i'm sure most of you come to my channel
to be entertained not to hear about the
happenings and minutiae of my
personal life but given my long absence
i
feel it is warranted before i get into
all the details let's get into the
future
i figured i should talk about the future
first since i'm sure
some of you aren't really interested in
what's been going on
behind the scenes and just want to know
when i'm going to get back to
embarrassing myself in public i've added
chapters
to this video so if you want you can
skip ahead or there are time stamps in
the description
as of now due to reasons that have been
or will be
enumerated in this video i'm currently
unable to
productively go out and film hidden
camera comedy videos
i've been looking for the right person
to hire as a content director to handle
new production while i'm recovering from
my back injury
and i had a few prospects but i've not
had much
luck in securing anyone when i'm better
and
i'm working on getting better every day
i promise
i'll get back to making hidden camera
comedy videos
i don't know how long it's going to take
but i'll get there
and i have a lot of great ideas in the
interim
my new content plan is as follows
release never before seen footage either
individually
or in compilation videos film
new comedy content that i can more
easily produce
from home given my injury is
still healing and the coronavirus
pandemic
and in the future i would like to
introduce something new to the channel
to start a podcast the whatever podcast
where
i invite whoever definitely youtubers
but
i'd like to expand out and get a variety
of
guests with different backgrounds for
example jordan jordan peterson
i'd love to have him on i think long
term if i want to continue doing hidden
camera comedy
i will have to simultaneously introduce
new types of content in conjunction
to supplement my earnings youtube has
made it very clear
what their stance is on the kind of
content i've made thus far
from a monetization point of view it's
it's unfortunately
no longer sustainable to exclusively be
producing
hidden camera comedy if i can make
content that is more readily monetizable
that can
fund what i still want to do creatively
that unfortunately
can't fund itself that seems like a
pretty clear path
to continuing with hidden camera comedy
and that could look something like uh
instead of just doing one prank a week
it's one prank and one podcast a week
though i hope i'd have your my
audience's support in
introducing new formats on this channel
on the topic of coronavirus
i have concern as to what coronavirus
and this pandemic
means vis-a-vis hidden camera comedy
as i'm sure you're all aware a great
deal of the hidden camera genre
involves approaching and interacting
with individuals
even before this pandemic simply by
virtue of approaching a total stranger
there existed a certain level of social
impropriety not to mention doing
something
weird or embarrassing to add on top of
that but now
and up until there is a vaccine every
social interaction
to some degree may or will be cloaked
in a fearful hesitation or reluctance
that
did not previously exist so more so now
than ever
people will be thinking what utility
does this interaction serve
and what will come with that is a much
greater frequency of
unwillingness to engage or outright
negative responses talking to a stranger
puts one at risk of
contracting this illness so that's a bit
of a dilemma
or maybe i'm blowing it out of
proportion who knows notwithstanding
for anyone located in santa barbara
california
i'm always looking to connect with
content creators
talent videographers photographers
editors etc
even if you aren't in the area maybe we
can still
find a way to work together the best way
to reach me is to email me
brian whatever.com and let's talk
or you can dm me on instagram or twitter
at
whatever so finally as for the reasons
i've been gone this is all said as a
matter of fact
i just want to communicate what's been
going on
i'm not seeking pity and frankly i
suspect that
given the kinds of videos i make i
imagine i'm not likely the most
deserving recipient of your sympathy if
you're wondering why i may be
presenting some of this stuff in a very
non-emotional
dry sort of way that's just my real life
personality i'm not about putting on the
crocodile tears
i'm not gonna make a spectacle of the
collapse of my mental health
i keep that private i suppose i adhere
to a more
stoic philosophy you know i just these
things i just deal with
despite this outlook it still does have
an effect on me but
i'm not going to put on a show for you
and cry about it it is what it is
empty platitudes anyways let's get into
everything
my health issues started when i was very
young
i only bring some of these up because i
believe to some degree
they've had a long-term impact on my
health when i was
10 years old i developed a very rare
illness
called idiopathic thrombocytopenic
pipora
or itp i felt fine but at the time i
suppose the recommended treatment for
this was
immediate hospitalization and
administration
of a medication called winrow well
while the windrow cured the itp i had a
severe allergic reaction to it which
resulted in acute
kidney failure it was not pleasant i had
whole body convulsions i was pissing
blood
throwing up blood my stomach felt like
it was on fire
i couldn't eat i lost a bunch of weight
i was hospitalized for 10 days
i nearly died it took me months
to recover i probably shouldn't
even be alive it was definitely a
traumatic experience
i it was actually during that
hospitalization that i became an atheist
at 10 years old kind of [ __ ] up to add
insult to injury
more recent research would indicate that
in children
itp usually resolves on its own
without any intervention or treatment in
my case
waiting or alternative treatments were
never attempted i guess
back then doctors were more gung-ho i
don't know
but this was a long time ago treatments
change
it's just unfortunate i do wonder
sometimes if the consequences of
childhood acute kidney failure will
materialize at some point
in the future and to think it could have
all been avoided
on the bright side i did get to go to
michael jackson's neverland ranch
and no he didn't touch me i've had
numerous injuries over the years
in high school i competed in wrestling
and broke my wrist my thumb and my nose
this is the exact moment i had my nose
[Music]
broken
my wrist and thumb healed but i've had a
deviated septum ever since and never
bothered
to get it fixed i've tweaked just about
everything from
years of surfing i surfed for over 10
years
i tore my hip flexor twisted ankles
shoulder tendinitis
tons of other stuff since 2015 i've had
chronic neck and knee pain which
coincides with a content slowdown that
you can see on youtube
the neck and knee pain is likely from
wrestling in high school and 10 plus
years of surfing which
was a passion of a mind but i've very
unfortunately since
discontinued entirely at the
recommendation of my doctor though
i do hope to prove him wrong one day and
get back to surfing i am re-focusing on
my fitness and trying to lose some
weight
i've gained a couple pounds gone are the
days of
being 180 pounds of muscle steal and sex
appeal
i'm now 180 pounds of lard and aging
zealous dwindling internet celebrity
being a neckbeard and playing 10 hours
of hearthstone
and world of warcraft today will do that
to you about two years ago i injured my
back
x-rays and mris revealed i have a spinal
fracture
in my low back at l5 s1 which caused a
section of my spine to
slide out of place at its worst i was
unable to sit or stand for
longer than 10 to 15 minutes the pain
was so bad
i would be out of breath for months i
was in bed most of the day
i had general pain stiffness weakness
discomfort additionally i had a sciatica
pain down both my legs
into my feet as well as muscle spasms
it's been painful and has limited and
continues to limit my activity quite a
bit
it has been gradually improving but it's
very slow and i still have chronic pain
due to the pain
i had incredible difficulty sleeping and
i became dependent
on sleep medication for about six months
which i have since managed to entirely
discontinue
but it was not a pleasant experience
i've always had
anxiety issues but when i was 17 i
started having full-blown panic attacks
this was in high school
i mostly overcame the panic attacks but
during tumultuous periods of my life
they do tend to resurface
as some of you may know i got a golden
retriever about three years ago
his name is max i love that dog i would
have done anything for him
he was my best friend unfortunately due
to my afro-mentioned
back injury i could not adequately look
after him so i had a friend start
watching him
golden retrievers require a lot of
exercise and after months of my back not
improving much
i made the most difficult decision of my
life
to have that friend who had been
watching him
adopt him at the end of the day
i needed to do what was best for max
and also what was best for me probably
going to get flack
for adopting him to my friend i do think
about him every day and
i miss him a lot but it would have been
self-serving of me to keep him
and i really believe it would have been
to max's detriment
no matter how much it pains me to admit
that i do get updates
all the time on max i visit with him
he's doing really well getting a ton of
exercise he's really thriving
check out this little montage
[Music]
so scott thank you for everything
my grandma died last summer i was by her
bedside in hospice when she died
i saw it happen and death isn't like how
it's portrayed in movies where they
peacefully and quietly slip away
her breathing was extremely labored for
hours prior to her death she appeared to
be
grimacing in pain even with painkillers
i wasn't even sure if she was conscious
her eyes looked
glazed over it's a terrifying thing i
had spent a good deal of time with her
the few years leading to her death
[Laughter]
with my parents brought her
here to santa barbara from france she
was suffering from dementia
or alzheimer's
among numerous other health problems
including a
broken neck she suffered from a fall a
few months prior to her death but in
respect to her
alzheimer's and dementia i think the
saddest thing was when she asked me
what my dad's her son's name was
she forgot
she had forgotten who her own son was
and
and that was crushing to her credit
she was a tough old lady she had a
tough life
i hope to make a video about her someday
three friends of mine committed suicide
they were all
about my age i had been friends with
them for 10 years and
had met them during college really good
guys it's a bit of a
sensitive subject for me so i don't
really want to go
into much more detail
my long-term girlfriend of two years
that i
genuinely saw a future with broke up
with me
out of the blue in december of 2019 i've
had
several other long-term relationships
but this has been by far the most
difficult breakup i have ever been
through
it didn't help that without going into
too much detail
she moved on fairly quickly
and just as i was starting to date again
the coronavirus happened the way i
typically deal with the breakup
is to move on and meet new people
not really possible during a pandemic
shortly after my previous update video i
was really ramping up to start filming
again
and as i was about to get going the
thomas fire happened which at the time
was the largest fire california had ever
seen the fire started
in ventura which is about 45 minutes
south of santa barbara
the smoke was blowing north and every
day
the sky was scorched red smoke settled
over the city and then one morning i
woke up to police
knocking on my door they tell me we need
to evacuate immediately so i looked
outside
and the smoke was just billowing past it
looked
very close and once we left we couldn't
even go back
at first there were police barricades
and then they called in the military
you know mostly for public safety but
also to prevent
looting of the evacuated zones i was
evacuated from my house for
a total of a month and so that kind of
put a damper on things
ever encroaching youtube [ __ ]
demonetization
and political correctness youtube wants
to be disney
and as such it is not a hospitable place
for more risque content further
declining
ad revenue on youtube due to
demonetization age restriction
and new policies has been very impactful
for me
more than half of my videos have been
demonetized
and or age restricted and several have
been removed you've probably heard about
demonetization from
other youtubers so i won't rehash all
the details
but demonetization has hit me very very
hard
harder than other youtubers and i've
spoken with many
and compared earnings i have seen a 90
decrease in ad revenue just imagine for
yourself if you made
90 less than what you used to make i'll
say this
renting a camel isn't cheap a four-hour
camel rental is over a thousand dollars
it costs money you know to make these
videos i enjoy making videos it's fun
but
when you start taking a loss or making
less than minimum wage
it's not super motivating i'm also
troubled by youtube's
double standards and hypocrisy take for
example my
twerking in public video i did with lexi
pantera which is my third most viewed
video with over
50 million views that video was
demonetized and age restricted almost
immediately
so i earned practically nothing on that
video i've appealed the age restriction
multiple times
youtube shuts me down every single time
for those who don't know
when the video is age restricted you
must be logged into
a youtube account to view it and
you must be 18 and over it also further
restricts monetization
meanwhile uh take for example takashi
69's music video
gooba which has been viewed over 300
million times
features several women dancing just as
or more provocatively
and let's be honest more it's more
provocatively in far less clothing
that video isn't age restricted anyone
can watch it
it doesn't make any sense i was also
burned out from youtube
i never took a break i never went on
vacation
i worked every single day i worked over
a thousand days straight
youtube isn't a nine to five where you
leave your work at work
it consumed my life it's all i thought
about
there was no checking out even if you
love what you do
it's still work if you don't take breaks
relax
it's just a recipe for burnout i just
had tunnel vision
and didn't realize that it wasn't
healthy to work as much as i was
my youtube house project was a failure
big failure
it was a big financial loss as well a
lot of money spent
a lot of time spent a lot of stress all
for nothing
really not much to say on this one it
was a [ __ ] up
verizon got socially engineered and i
got sim swapped so
i lost my instagram handle at whatever
lost my followers
and permanently lost all my photos as
instagram was unable to restore them
luckily
i got my handle back after two months of
trying everything but all the photos are
gone
lots of the followers gone dealing with
that was
a massive headache it's nearly
impossible
to contact instagram luckily i had a
friend who had a connection in instagram
otherwise i would have likely never
gotten my handle back
so big thank you to keith who helped me
out
i developed a video game addiction it
was an escape a distraction from the
difficult things
i was going through i know when it comes
to
addictions it could be a lot worse
but addictions of any kind aren't good
with the exception of video games i
think i've managed to keep my head on
pretty straight you know i don't gamble
i rarely drink
and when i do it's one to two drinks i
don't do any drugs i smoked weed a few
times
when i was a teenager but i haven't
touched it in over a decade since it
gave me anxiety i am happy to report
though that i quit playing video games
entirely since
april in just a six month period during
2018
i was involved in three lawsuits i had
never been involved in
any lawsuits prior to that the first
lawsuit involved the injury of my dog
max
by lacumbre animal hospital a local
veterinarian office
max underwent a common procedure which
required him to
wear a cone afterwards the procedure
went fine
however lacumbre animal hospital
incorrectly
and negligently applied the cone the
type of cone they used
has rigid and sharp plastic securing
hooks
so to speak these were incorrectly
threaded inwards
towards his neck when they should have
been threaded outwards
the manufacturer of the very cone that
they sold me and that they applied to
max
has instructions on proper application
the improper application of the cone
resulted in significant
wounds to max's neck he's kind of zonked
out from
all the medication he's been on and they
sedated him
to be able to get in and do all this
yeah he's he's tired he just got back
from the vet i think it was
about three hours ago and that is from
an e-caller
really did a number on him they just put
it on wrong and
the little super hard plastic things
were basically poking his neck
you'll get better soon it'll get better
soon
i brought him back in to get treated i
otherwise had a good relationship with
my vet there and
yeah i chalked it up to an innocent
mistake and
max was going to be okay during the
follow-up visit i
politely pointed out that i think they
made a mistake
and i asked if they would be willing to
comp his treatment
related to his neck wounds seemed like a
reasonable request they ended up
agreeing to compass treatment and
any follow-up visits related to his neck
wounds however
the following morning i received a
voicemail from dr
eve cusis a veterinarian and
owner of lucumber animal hospital
requesting that i call her back
this is eve i'm one of the owners of
looking for animal hospital
um and i'd like to speak to you today i
assumed she was calling to
check in on max and maybe apologize
about what happened when i called her
back however
she went into an uninterrupted
five-minute belligerent
diatribe which culminated in her
dismissing me
and max from the practice despite max's
need
for further treatment if dr cusis
believed that this
single incident irreparably damaged
the relationship to the point that i
needed to be dismissed
i have great concern for any other pet
owners
who ever bring up legitimate grievances
or who have their pet harmed by lacumbre
animal hospital i
was astounded that dr kusus resorted to
dismissal when it was clearly evident
max would shortly need follow-up care
for his neck wounds
not to mention the significant benefit
of
continuity of care i had never had
any prior issues with lacumbre animal
hospital
i was always on time for my appointments
i never missed an appointment
i always paid my bill and i was treated
all staff with courtesy and respect the
following day
i sent an email to lecombre animal
hospital
letting them know that i'd be bringing
max somewhere else
and that i expected them to cover my
out-of-pocket expenses for follow-up
treatment
at this point lacumbre animal hospital
decided to
get their insurance involved after
numerous unnecessary delays
and getting the runaround from their
insurance
my patients had been exhausted and i
proceeded to file a lawsuit i was
seeking just
my out-of-pocket expenses to treat max
it wasn't a lot it was less than a
thousand dollars
at that point it wasn't even really
about the money
it was a matter of principle the whole
situation was just
egregious from what happened to max to
the dismissal
to just getting the runaround from their
insurance it was
a joke fast forward a few months and we
had a court date it was a bit
intimidating because i was there alone
and lacumbre animal hospital
brought two veterinarians the practice
manager
and an attorney our case got called last
the judge heard our respective arguments
and with very little deliberation she
ended up ruling in my favor
i was awarded a judgment against
lacumbre animal hospital
for the damages i requested in my filing
plus court costs
they told me they were going to do an
appeal but they ended up just
paying me the judgment and that was it
kind of
silly but whatever the second lawsuit
involved my ex-housemate
ex-friend ben we were renting out a
house together this was the house for my
youtube house project
and i certainly put some of the blame on
the failure of that on him he decided he
wanted to move
to los angeles so he bailed a few
months into our lease he stopped paying
rent
and did nothing to help me find a
replacement
so i had to cover his share of rent on
my own i was paying
5 000 a month in rent he ended up owing
me about ten thousand dollars i made
numerous attempts to settle with him
none of which were successful he refused
to pay
so i filed a lawsuit against him seeking
ten thousand dollars in damages
a few months later we had our court date
i
won the lawsuit and was awarded a ten
thousand dollar judgment against him
unfortunately
shortly thereafter he filed for
bankruptcy benjamin
case number two five please raise your
right hand you psalm is where the
testimony about to give will be the
truth the whole truth and nothing but
the true self of god
yes what is your name which he
ultimately was granted and had all his
debts
discharged including the ten thousand
dollars he owed me
so he effectively stole ten thousand
dollars from me
conveniently within three months of his
bankruptcy
he went to coachella went to las vegas
and went to miami
and the last lawsuit related to my now
defunct
xmcn defy media which owes me something
like
twenty thousand to thirty thousand
dollars in november of 2018
defy media abruptly without any warning
ceased
all operations and totally shut down and
it
wasn't just me that was affected a lot
of other big youtubers were part of the
defy
mcn they basically went bankrupt and
according to matpat
who was also with defy the total they
owe
is 1.7 million dollars that's money that
i
and other youtubers are never going to
see
there's really not much to say it's been
two years now
i haven't heard anything and i haven't
received anything
not a cent so that money as good as gone
defy has been totally dissolved
it's over needless to say
the past few years have not been easy
i've been meaning to make an update
video for a while
it's been a long time coming but it's
been hard with
everything that's been going on and
frankly i've been pretty down i've been
reading a lot though and and two books
in particular really helped me
meditations by marcus aurelius and
12 rules for life by jordan peterson
have been immeasurably helpful and
i would be in a much darker place if not
for their work
i do want to thank a few people first i
want to thank you
my audience many of you have reached out
to me privately
via instagram twitter and email sending
kind words
every day someone sends me a message
asking me
when i'll be back i read all your
messages
and try to respond when i can it's been
very good
to hear from all of you your words have
always lifted my spirits
i really do appreciate your patience
while i've
dealt with all this absences of this
kind are not well
appreciated by viewers understandably so
i've likely lost a great deal of my
audience which is
also understandable i suspect this video
will not receive
many views in part due to youtube's
algorithm
in de-prioritizing inactive channels
but but so for those of you still
watching whatever
thank you i also very much want to thank
my dad mom sister and my friend
scott and carmen for being incredibly
supportive
for those of you who want to keep tabs
on me and whatever
of course you know stay tuned here uh
you can also follow me on instagram and
twitter
at whatever thank you for watching thank
you for your patience
and i'll see you soon
wow