uh 呃
congratulations on the promotion 祝贺你升职
eric 艾瑞克
you've really earned it after all the hard work you've been doing with the company over the last few years 在过去的几年里，你在公司里辛辛苦苦地工作，这是你应得的
thank you so much 非常感谢
sir 先生
it's really an honor 我真的很荣幸
you've got to be kidding me after all the overtime i've been putting in 你一定是在跟我开玩笑吧，我已经加班了
this is how you reward me 这就是你回报我的方式
i'm the one who did all the leg work on that hughes pc deal 我就是那个为休斯个人电脑交易做足功夫的人
i'm sorry 对不起
marcus was a tough decision between you two 马库斯是你们两个之间的艰难抉择
i've been here since before the i 我从我来之前就在这里了
p P
o O
do you know how long i've been waiting for this 你知道我等这一天等了多久吗
to be honest 老实说
i decided in favor of eric because you have a history of outbursts and a short temper 我决定支持埃里克，因为你有暴躁和暴躁的历史
i trust eric to keep his cool 我相信埃里克会保持冷静的
intense situations 紧张的情况
whereas i can't say the same about you 但我不能对你说同样的话
he's got a point 他说得有道理
maybe you should take a breath before you say something you'll regret like you did in that conference call last month 也许你应该先喘口气，然后再说一些你会后悔的话，就像上个月在电话会议上所做的那样
this can't be happening sort of a fucking bitch 这不可能发生在他妈的婊子身上
i can't believe this horse shit 我真不敢相信这马屎
anyway 不管怎样，
congrats again 再次祝贺你
eric 艾瑞克
that new corner office is all yours and you'll have your own secretary come monday morning 那间新的角落办公室是你的了，你自己的秘书会在星期一早上来
this is an amazing opportunity 这是一个绝佳的机会
sir 先生
i'll be working harder than ever to prove that i'm the right man for the job 我将比以往任何时候都更加努力地工作，以证明我是这份工作的合适人选
i've never had a personal secretary before 我以前从来没有过私人秘书
do you know who shall be that'll be up to h 你知道将由谁来决定吗？
r R
to work out in the meantime you go relax and enjoy your long weekend 在锻炼的同时，你去放松，享受你的长周末
hopefully you'll be nice and refreshed on monday morning when you start your new position 希望你在周一早上开始你的新工作时会表现得很好，精神焕发
oh 噢
i will 这就做
sir 先生
i'll be taking my wife out to the best restaurant in the city to celebrate 我要带我的妻子去城里最好的餐厅庆祝
thank you so much 非常感谢
where the hell is she we agree to meet at six p 我们约好晚上6点见面，她去哪儿了？
m sharp M夏普
sop your remark 别说你的话了
right 正确的
there you are 原来你在这儿啊
and i thought we agreed not to use any names you never know who could be listening 我以为我们说好了不用任何名字，你永远不知道谁会监听
oh 噢
don't be so uptight 别那么紧张
there isn't a soul within thirty 三十岁以内没有一个人
so did you bring what i requested 你带来我要的东西了吗？
of course 当然了
however 然而，
i told you the rules online money first 我跟你说过了，先在网上赚钱
then you get the goods 然后你就能拿到货
count it every last dollars there 在那里清点每一块钱
no 不是
naturally i already read your mind 当然，我已经读懂了你的心思
so i know you weren't lying here is your freshly crafted trinket 所以我知道你没有撒谎，这是你刚做好的小玩意儿
it's better be worth it 最好是值得的
i had to take out a second mortgage on my house to afford this deal 为了买得起这笔交易，我不得不为我的房子申请第二笔抵押贷款。
how am i supposed to be sure this little thing is going to work 我怎么能确定这个小玩意儿会成功呢？
i followed all of your very specific instructions down to the letter 我严格遵守了你所有的具体指示
trust me 请相信我
you will get everything you wished for out of the spell and then some 你会从咒语中得到你想要的一切，然后
remember 记住
your target will need direct skin contact with the trinket in order for the spell to activate 你的目标需要与饰品直接接触皮肤才能激活咒语。
and don't touch it yourself unless you want your own wish to backfire on you 不要自己碰它，除非你想让自己的愿望适得其反
huh 哈
oh 噢
i can't wait to see what happens to eric on monday 我迫不及待地想看看埃里克周一会发生什么
wow 哇
this office is perfect 这间办公室太完美了
oh 噢
it's even better than the pictures 它甚至比照片还要好
healthy rays 健康射线
stock options 股票期权
a huge pension 一大笔退休金
my own secretary and beautiful corner office 我自己的秘书和漂亮的角落办公室
life is good 生活是美好的
all that hard work is finally paid off 所有的辛勤工作终于得到了回报
someone get me a present 谁给我买个礼物
mark got me a gift 马克给我买了一件礼物
i expected he'd sooner spit in my coffee than be a gracious sore loser for once 我以为他宁可往我的咖啡里吐口水，也不愿意当一次大方的失败者
what is this thing 这是什么东西？
some sort of carving out 某种形式的开拓
is that me 那是我吗？
the hell was that how did that thing 见鬼了，那玩意儿怎么会
shock me 吓我一跳
is that is it electrified 是不是带电了？
wait 等
why does the room suddenly seem so much bigger 为什么房间突然变得这么大？
oh 噢
oh my god 我的天啊
am i growing breasts 我是在长乳房吗
i'm turning into a woman 我正在变成一个女人
oh god 哦，天哪
please make this stop who or what is doing this to me 请阻止是谁或什么东西对我做了这些
look at my reflection 看着我的倒影
i'm a blonde now 我现在是金发女郎了
help 帮助
cute looking one at that 看起来像个可爱的人
the 这个
oh 噢
my breasts are growing even bigger 我的胸部变得更大了
is it not enough for me to turn into a woman 我变成一个女人还不够吗？
why do i have to have the body of a slutty porn star too 为什么我也要有淫荡的色情明星的身体
oh 噢
i can feel my tank top and underwear changing too 我也能感觉到我的背心和内裤在变
wait 等
my clothes can transform as well 我的衣服也可以变形
yeah 嗯
no 不是
not that anything but that stop it 不是说什么，而是阻止它
yeah 嗯
the 这个
that's it 就这样
i've got to get help 我得去找人帮忙
i need someone to 我需要有人帮我
what the hell my shoes suddenly turn in the heels 见鬼我的鞋子突然在鞋跟里翻了个底朝天
a little statue i touched it must be what's doing this to me 我摸到的一座小雕像肯定就是它对我造成的影响
but why would 但为什么会
mark senate 马克·参议院
is he responsible for this 他对此负有责任吗？
ah good morning 啊，早上好。
you must be my new secretary 你一定是我的新秘书吧
mark 马克
you son of a bitch 你这个狗娘养的东西
is something wrong 出什么事了吗？
my dear 亲爱的
you look like you're having a rough 你看起来好像过得很艰难
more 更多
you're the one who did this to me 你就是那个把我弄成这样的人
aren't you 不是你吗
i opened your gift and then this happened to me 我打开了你的礼物，然后这一切发生在我身上
i'd watch your tone if i were you 如果我是你，我会注意你的语气
that's no way to treat your new book 这不是对待你的新书的方式
boss 老板
you're not my boss and i'm not your secretary 你不是我的老板，我也不是你的秘书
are you so sure enough 你就这么确定吗？
that trinket not only transformed your appearance 那个小玩意儿不仅改变了你的外表
it changed your entire 它改变了你的整个
the eric you were no longer exists 你曾经的埃里克已经不存在了
now there's only eric 现在只剩下埃里克了
that's bullshit and totally impossible 那是胡扯，完全不可能
oh 噢
and you turning into a woman is perfectly reasonable 你变成一个女人是完全合理的
you have a point 你说得有道理
what about my family and friends 那我的家人和朋友呢？
they should know who i am 他们应该知道我是谁
your parents will see you as their daughter 你的父母会把你当成他们的女儿
your wife 你的妻子
i suppose is your new bff 我想这是你的新男友吧
however 然而，
as far as the company is concerned 就公司而言，
i'm the only one who received a promotion last week 我是上周唯一一个升职的人
this is now my office 这现在是我的办公室
and you are nothing but my secretary 你不过是我的秘书
that's my life 这就是我的生活
you son of a bitch 你这个狗娘养的东西
change me back right now or i'll tell everyone what you did to me 马上把我变回来，否则我会告诉所有人你对我做了什么
and how do you think that will go 你认为这将如何进行？
everyone now knows u 现在每个人都知道你了
s %s
erica 埃里卡
the woman 那个女人
if you go spouting nonsense like that 如果你像那样胡说八道
people will think you crazy 人们会认为你疯了
if you ever want an opportunity to change back to normal 如果你想要一个恢复正常的机会
you'll keep that pretty now that you shut 既然你闭上了嘴，你就能保持漂亮了
and you'll do everything i tell you 我让你做什么你就做什么
mark 马克
there you are 原来你在这儿啊
i hope you're enjoying your new corner office 我希望你喜欢你的新角落办公室
it's absolutely marvellous 这真是太棒了
sir 先生
i couldn't be happier about my promotion 我对自己的升职感到非常高兴
you must be the new hire that'll work for mark 你一定是会为马克工作的新员工
i believe your name is erica 我相信你的名字是艾丽卡
is that correct 对吗？
yes 是
sir 先生
i'm mark's new secretary 我是马克的新秘书
oh 噢
i'm sure you'll love working with them 我相信你会喜欢和他们一起工作的
such a great name 这么伟大的名字
oh 噢
and remember 记住
mark 马克
we've got a brunch with the board of directors of nine thirty champ 我们要和九点半冠军的董事会共进早午餐
yes 是
sir 先生
i'll see you there 我会在那里等你
yeah 嗯
oh 噢
yeah 嗯
there's still one more part of my wish that this trinket has to fulfill 我的愿望还有一个部分，那就是这个小玩意儿要实现
oh my god 我的天啊
how long do i have to live like this before you'll change me back 我要这样活多久你才能把我变回来
oh 噢
i was thinking several years at minimum 我想至少要几年
maybe longer with bad behavior 如果有不良行为，时间可能会更长
however 然而，
i could be 我可能是
persuaded to change you back soon as you go beyond the call of duty 被说服在你超出职责范围后尽快把你变回来
what do you mean 你什么意思
i didn't give you a figure like that just for eye candy 我给你这样的数字不是为了吸引眼球
if you ever want to be eric 如果你想成为埃里克
you'll be putting that body to 你会把那具身体
use as my new source of office stressful 用作我新的办公室压力源