1
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2
00:02:01,288 --> 00:02:03,199
我叫陈伟文，是一个作家

3
00:02:03,498 --> 00:02:05,489
“隋处摸”是我的笔名

4
00:02:05,667 --> 00:02:06,372
没错

5
00:02:06,543 --> 00:02:09,831
其实我只是在报纸的风月版写情色小说

6
00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:11,540
但我经常都安慰自己

7
00:02:11,715 --> 00:02:13,626
其实我的小说一点都不容易写

8
00:02:13,842 --> 00:02:15,548
譬如说，明明是女人的乳房

9
00:02:15,719 --> 00:02:17,129
就要写作“水蜜桃”

10
00:02:17,346 --> 00:02:20,213
女人的性器官，就写作“水帘洞”

11
00:02:24,061 --> 00:02:26,302
她是我女朋友，她也是一个作家

12
00:02:26,688 --> 00:02:27,928
不过她就是大名鼎鼎

13
00:02:28,106 --> 00:02:31,598
畅销文艺爱情小说家席梦丝

14
00:02:32,402 --> 00:02:35,269
几年前她那本肉麻当纯情的小说…

15
00:02:35,447 --> 00:02:38,564
《想着你抱着他爱着谁》卖到翻印十几版

16
00:02:38,784 --> 00:02:40,365
比得上香港地图

17
00:02:40,535 --> 00:02:42,400
之后她现在一行字的稿费

18
00:02:42,579 --> 00:02:44,194
比我写足一晚还多

19
00:02:44,831 --> 00:02:47,823
你看看她，多优雅，多端庄

20
00:02:48,043 --> 00:02:51,001
其实她私底下，有不为人知的一面…

21
00:02:54,216 --> 00:02:55,331
大力点

22
00:02:55,842 --> 00:02:57,378
大力点

23
00:02:58,387 --> 00:03:01,379
大力点…

24
00:03:02,099 --> 00:03:02,884
左转呀

25
00:03:03,058 --> 00:03:04,889
等一下，怎么左转呀？

26
00:03:05,060 --> 00:03:05,719
就像开车那样呀？

27
00:03:05,894 --> 00:03:06,883
怎么你这么笨！

28
00:03:07,062 --> 00:03:08,643
每次都要我提你！这样呀！

29
00:03:08,814 --> 00:03:12,102
你记得吗？我教了你很多次，是这样呀！

30
00:03:12,526 --> 00:03:13,641
好痛呀！

31
00:03:13,819 --> 00:03:15,355
我正不正？

32
00:03:15,737 --> 00:03:16,442
正！

33
00:03:16,613 --> 00:03:17,693
看着我

34
00:03:17,989 --> 00:03:19,445
看着我

35
00:03:21,076 --> 00:03:22,782
干嘛这么大力呀？

36
00:03:25,580 --> 00:03:26,865
进去点

37
00:03:29,626 --> 00:03:31,287
进这么深干嘛？

38
00:03:32,713 --> 00:03:34,795
我快要到了，我们一起吧！

39
00:03:35,674 --> 00:03:36,629
来了

40
00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:37,915
到了

41
00:03:38,260 --> 00:03:39,875
已经到了

42
00:03:45,767 --> 00:03:49,635
你刚刚射的时候，好像没叫？

43
00:03:49,896 --> 00:03:51,011
有，怎会没有？

44
00:03:51,189 --> 00:03:53,771
我在叫，哗，到了，这样呀

45
00:03:54,359 --> 00:03:55,940
都没看到你反白眼的？

46
00:03:56,111 --> 00:03:58,227
有反，全反了

47
00:03:58,447 --> 00:03:59,903
全白了

48
00:04:00,323 --> 00:04:01,108
瞎子一样

49
00:04:01,283 --> 00:04:01,897
真的？

50
00:04:02,075 --> 00:04:03,281
真！

51
00:04:03,493 --> 00:04:04,778
再来一炮，马上！

52
00:04:04,953 --> 00:04:05,942
又来？

53
00:04:06,121 --> 00:04:07,031
就是这样

54
00:04:07,205 --> 00:04:10,948
我对做爱就产生了莫名奇妙的恐惧

55
00:04:15,130 --> 00:04:16,620
梁景，别催啦

56
00:04:16,798 --> 00:04:18,834
就差结尾，很快，结尾了…

57
00:04:21,511 --> 00:04:23,126
以后不用写？

58
00:04:23,513 --> 00:04:25,424
风月版怎可以说停就停？

59
00:04:25,599 --> 00:04:27,055
你知不知道全香港每天有多少男人

60
00:04:27,225 --> 00:04:29,341
都靠我那几百字来做下体运动呀？

61
00:04:29,978 --> 00:04:32,139
其实有没有想过把我转到体育版去呢？

62
00:04:33,106 --> 00:04:34,471
我推荐你…

63
00:04:34,733 --> 00:04:36,974
现在上网什么都有得看

64
00:04:37,319 --> 00:04:39,651
风月版没得做啦，我给转到宗教版去

65
00:04:39,821 --> 00:04:42,608
昨天才说完马太福音，今天要说阿弥陀佛

66
00:04:42,783 --> 00:04:44,319
阿弥陀佛好呀！

67
00:04:44,493 --> 00:04:46,449
老袁，我们好惨啊…

68
00:04:46,620 --> 00:04:49,032
知道了，风月版给裁了嘛

69
00:04:49,247 --> 00:04:50,703
我这里也撑不了多久了

70
00:04:50,874 --> 00:04:52,410
唉，简直是世风日下！

71
00:04:52,584 --> 00:04:55,496
万料不到，色情事业都有衰落的一天呀

72
00:04:55,712 --> 00:04:56,622
就说你吧

73
00:04:56,797 --> 00:04:58,503
在这儿卖盗版，就是贼嘛

74
00:04:58,673 --> 00:04:59,833
现在贼都没得做

75
00:05:00,008 --> 00:05:03,171
你说香港还不死吗？这城市正垂死中！

76
00:05:03,428 --> 00:05:04,508
你错了

77
00:05:04,679 --> 00:05:06,169
这城市已经死了

78
00:05:06,515 --> 00:05:10,303
不过我觉得呢，色情事业是永垂不朽的

79
00:05:10,727 --> 00:05:13,514
你想想，人类的来源是什么？

80
00:05:13,688 --> 00:05:14,848
就是好色嘛！

81
00:05:15,023 --> 00:05:17,230
如果人不好色，哪还有人类？

82
00:05:17,484 --> 00:05:18,394
一定有得做的！

83
00:05:18,568 --> 00:05:21,605
对…可是现在上网免费任看

84
00:05:21,780 --> 00:05:23,395
哪有人买呀？

85
00:05:23,949 --> 00:05:26,031
免费也要有内容呀

86
00:05:26,284 --> 00:05:28,650
明不明白？内容呀！

87
00:05:29,371 --> 00:05:30,861
不明白

88
00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:35,373
香港，胜在有“居者有其屋”

89
00:05:35,710 --> 00:05:37,041
色片

90
00:05:37,212 --> 00:05:39,874
没理由色者没其片的！

91
00:05:40,882 --> 00:05:43,498
我们叫团友每人投几万

92
00:05:43,677 --> 00:05:45,167
集资去投资拍AV

93
00:05:45,345 --> 00:05:46,050
那当上投资者

94
00:05:46,221 --> 00:05:48,257
那我们想拍啥，就拍啥罗！

95
00:05:48,431 --> 00:05:51,343
那些团友又可以去看AV的拍摄过程

96
00:05:51,518 --> 00:05:53,679
我们三个拿着版权

97
00:05:53,854 --> 00:05:55,970
能卖多少钱，我们三个分了它

98
00:05:56,273 --> 00:05:58,229
可是拍AV好像不便宜吧？

99
00:05:58,400 --> 00:05:59,389
那可不是呀！

100
00:05:59,568 --> 00:06:01,354
我问过了，拍一部AV…，拍一部AV…

101
00:06:01,528 --> 00:06:03,484
几万可以，几十万也可以

102
00:06:03,697 --> 00:06:04,482
丰俭由人呀

103
00:06:04,656 --> 00:06:06,772
不就是吗！拍戏的事很灵活的嘛

104
00:06:06,950 --> 00:06:07,564
你想想

105
00:06:07,742 --> 00:06:11,075
参加那些蔡澜美食团也要几万块呀

106
00:06:11,246 --> 00:06:13,157
说不定他还把东西全吃光呢！

107
00:06:13,331 --> 00:06:15,071
一定很多人参加的！

108
00:06:15,667 --> 00:06:16,622
真的可以考虑

109
00:06:16,793 --> 00:06:19,500
我有个朋友，在日本专门寄AV给我盗版

110
00:06:19,671 --> 00:06:20,751
找她安排

111
00:06:20,922 --> 00:06:23,254
拍完以后再卖给日本人也行

112
00:06:23,425 --> 00:06:26,087
那就行了，她要一半，我们三个要一半

113
00:06:26,261 --> 00:06:27,797
说着说着好像真的成事了！

114
00:06:27,971 --> 00:06:30,132
有噱头，我也有兴趣呀

115
00:06:30,348 --> 00:06:31,133
你是谁呀？

116
00:06:31,308 --> 00:06:32,297
我来买A片的

117
00:06:32,475 --> 00:06:33,590
几万块去见识见识

118
00:06:33,768 --> 00:06:35,099
我想我很多朋友也有兴趣

119
00:06:35,270 --> 00:06:37,306
听到没有，马上有第一个客人了！

120
00:06:37,480 --> 00:06:40,096
如果我们这次做得好的话，长做长有呀！

121
00:06:40,275 --> 00:06:42,732
那马上去搞啦！已经未出发先兴奋了

122
00:06:42,903 --> 00:06:44,268
我说起来都有一点硬了

123
00:06:46,031 --> 00:06:46,816
这张好呀！

124
00:06:46,990 --> 00:06:49,606
那张《淫荡人妻》，给我一张嘛

125
00:06:49,784 --> 00:06:52,070
妈的！买你妹呀！上网下载啦！

126
00:07:15,810 --> 00:07:16,925
相声呀！

127
00:07:17,646 --> 00:07:19,477
相声？　　　他写着赵本山

128
00:07:19,648 --> 00:07:21,354
那些内地人真红　　　这边…

129
00:07:21,524 --> 00:07:22,809
对了，帮我们安排

130
00:07:22,984 --> 00:07:24,394
拍AV那女的是什么人？

131
00:07:24,569 --> 00:07:26,981
本身是香港人，但是在日本住了很久了

132
00:07:27,155 --> 00:07:29,487
她一直帮我买些日本新出的A片

133
00:07:29,658 --> 00:07:30,989
寄回香港给我盗版

134
00:07:31,409 --> 00:07:33,024
这回她出了不力的

135
00:07:33,453 --> 00:07:35,785
前面蹲着的那个就是她

136
00:07:41,628 --> 00:07:43,960
鸠山！

137
00:07:54,391 --> 00:07:55,631
到了…

138
00:07:55,850 --> 00:07:58,557
旺中带静呢，上了这条楼梯…

139
00:07:59,688 --> 00:08:01,804
这里也蛮神秘的嘛

140
00:08:02,107 --> 00:08:03,893
那和我们来的目的一样

141
00:08:04,109 --> 00:08:06,441
我有一种不祥的预感

142
00:08:08,488 --> 00:08:09,523
你的

143
00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:10,903
你的

144
00:08:11,658 --> 00:08:12,363
你的

145
00:08:12,534 --> 00:08:13,694
你的

146
00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:15,866
你的…

147
00:08:16,538 --> 00:08:18,699
这些是…你们的

148
00:08:20,709 --> 00:08:23,325
我待会就带你们去看看充满特色的房间

149
00:08:23,545 --> 00:08:26,537
包管你们会有“哗”一声的感觉

150
00:08:33,096 --> 00:08:35,553
哗…

151
00:08:36,808 --> 00:08:38,344
是不是真妈的“哗”呢？

152
00:08:38,601 --> 00:08:41,889
这里最特别是可以横着进横着出

153
00:08:42,147 --> 00:08:44,229
他妈的特别呢

154
00:08:45,442 --> 00:08:48,400
这里跟殓房没差多少呀！

155
00:08:48,695 --> 00:08:49,730
那可不一样！

156
00:08:49,904 --> 00:08:53,442
殓房要人拉你出来，这里不用唷

157
00:08:54,492 --> 00:08:55,607
我终于知道这个世上

158
00:08:55,785 --> 00:08:57,321
有地方比住地下房更惨！

159
00:08:57,579 --> 00:08:59,570
房间那么小，怎么住呀？

160
00:08:59,748 --> 00:09:01,204
你把它当储物柜…

161
00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:03,327
那就他妈的大呢！

162
00:09:04,836 --> 00:09:05,621
什么鸠？

163
00:09:05,795 --> 00:09:06,875
鸠山初代子

164
00:09:07,047 --> 00:09:08,753
代子小姐是吧？

165
00:09:09,257 --> 00:09:11,043
你也有你的道理

166
00:09:11,426 --> 00:09:13,667
我们应该凡事向好的方向看

167
00:09:13,845 --> 00:09:15,710
难道我们专程过来是住五星级酒店吗？

168
00:09:15,930 --> 00:09:16,635
没错！

169
00:09:16,806 --> 00:09:19,047
我们的钱，应该花在值得花的地方

170
00:09:19,225 --> 00:09:20,010
说得对

171
00:09:20,185 --> 00:09:22,597
我们的精力，都应该出在最应该出的地方

172
00:09:23,938 --> 00:09:25,849
真麻烦你呀，鸠小姐！

173
00:09:26,191 --> 00:09:27,146
不用客气！

174
00:09:27,317 --> 00:09:29,273
初代是…你名字？

175
00:09:29,986 --> 00:09:30,975
还是兴趣呢？

176
00:09:31,196 --> 00:09:32,231
是我妈妈改的！

177
00:09:32,405 --> 00:09:35,693
你老妈喜欢初代…　　　是呀！

178
00:09:36,785 --> 00:09:38,741
靠，我们会不会被骗了？

179
00:09:38,912 --> 00:09:39,947
靠！我现在啥都不怕

180
00:09:40,121 --> 00:09:43,113
我最怕那个初代子，兼任AV女主角而已

181
00:09:43,333 --> 00:09:44,573
那我真的好怕喔

182
00:09:44,751 --> 00:09:46,787
不会那么无良的，我跟她说明…

183
00:09:46,961 --> 00:09:50,044
要大胸，又出名的AV女优的

184
00:09:50,799 --> 00:09:53,131
其实，你们会不会太悲观呢？

185
00:09:53,468 --> 00:09:55,174
整天觉得人家要骗我们似的

186
00:09:55,470 --> 00:09:56,630
那应该怎么样？

187
00:09:56,930 --> 00:10:00,548
你想想，我们看了几十年AV

188
00:10:00,767 --> 00:10:04,134
做了几十年男人，打了几千次飞机

189
00:10:04,312 --> 00:10:04,801
可是明天

190
00:10:04,979 --> 00:10:08,722
是真真正正第一次接触到真正的AV女优

191
00:10:09,150 --> 00:10:11,186
拍属于自己的AV

192
00:10:12,487 --> 00:10:14,148
为了迎接这个神圣的一刻

193
00:10:14,322 --> 00:10:17,234
我们是不是应该一起斋戒沐浴呢？

194
00:10:17,700 --> 00:10:19,656
斋戒沐浴？

195
00:10:48,356 --> 00:10:50,517
其实，下雨也不错呀！

196
00:10:50,733 --> 00:10:52,598
明天更大乳呀…

197
00:10:52,777 --> 00:10:53,892
你又知道？

198
00:10:54,070 --> 00:10:57,312
那些女优好大乳的嘛…

199
00:10:57,699 --> 00:10:59,690
希望在明天嘛

200
00:11:23,975 --> 00:11:24,760
各位团友

201
00:11:24,934 --> 00:11:27,220
这里就是无数AV的胜地

202
00:11:27,812 --> 00:11:29,552
这里是一个复合片场

203
00:11:29,731 --> 00:11:32,598
看，那边就有一个诊所

204
00:11:32,775 --> 00:11:34,811
整天在拍《淫贱女护士》的

205
00:11:35,111 --> 00:11:36,226
这边就是课室

206
00:11:36,404 --> 00:11:37,985
拍《纯情学生妹》

207
00:11:38,239 --> 00:11:39,319
是不是他妈的“哗”呢？

208
00:11:39,490 --> 00:11:41,902
哗…

209
00:11:42,076 --> 00:11:42,735
喂喂！

210
00:11:42,911 --> 00:11:44,822
这张床呀，不就是经常拍AV那张？

211
00:11:45,038 --> 00:11:46,244
帮我拍照…

212
00:11:46,414 --> 00:11:47,779
我操你…

213
00:11:47,957 --> 00:11:49,322
我操你…

214
00:11:49,542 --> 00:11:51,828
别去呀！

215
00:11:53,546 --> 00:11:55,036
你真是有眼光呢

216
00:11:55,215 --> 00:11:57,957
这里是不少AV男优出精的地方

217
00:11:58,134 --> 00:11:58,919
出在哪里呢？

218
00:11:59,093 --> 00:12:00,549
通常出在那里！

219
00:12:00,845 --> 00:12:02,836
如果用紫外光灯一照

220
00:12:03,097 --> 00:12:04,428
整张床会发光的呢！

221
00:12:04,599 --> 00:12:05,759
听见没有

222
00:12:05,934 --> 00:12:08,971
早晨，大家好！

223
00:12:09,145 --> 00:12:10,931
这位是导演，不用理他的

224
00:12:11,105 --> 00:12:14,017
那…就随便扫墓那样鞠个躬就走啦

225
00:12:15,109 --> 00:12:16,724
请多多指教！

226
00:12:18,988 --> 00:12:20,603
大家好

227
00:12:20,949 --> 00:12:22,780
这是辰巳唯小姐

228
00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:32,957
大家好，我是辰巳唯

229
00:12:33,127 --> 00:12:34,287
请多多指教

230
00:12:35,171 --> 00:12:37,958
辰巳唯，F Cup，前赛车女郎

231
00:12:38,132 --> 00:12:39,872
绰号赛车皇后！

232
00:12:40,093 --> 00:12:41,458
开心是好的

233
00:12:41,636 --> 00:12:43,467
但是大家还傻逼的不开始

234
00:12:43,638 --> 00:12:45,128
就拍不完了

235
00:12:51,229 --> 00:12:52,639
原来也蛮闷的喔

236
00:12:52,814 --> 00:12:54,805
对呀，还不是那几招

237
00:12:55,191 --> 00:12:56,180
停！

238
00:12:56,359 --> 00:12:57,769
鸠山，帮我翻译

239
00:12:57,944 --> 00:12:58,182
是

240
00:12:58,361 --> 00:12:59,146
我就这么觉得呀

241
00:12:59,320 --> 00:13:01,151
这位男优刚做的都太一般了

242
00:13:01,447 --> 00:13:03,688
完全能猜到男主角怎么做

243
00:13:03,866 --> 00:13:05,072
现在我们作主嘛

244
00:13:05,243 --> 00:13:08,201
我认为呢，一来就进主题，出绝招吧！

245
00:13:08,371 --> 00:13:09,486
好呀！　　　绝招？啥绝招呀？

246
00:13:09,664 --> 00:13:11,825
试试人肉…

247
00:13:12,083 --> 00:13:13,072
直升机！

248
00:13:13,835 --> 00:13:15,041
不好意思

249
00:13:15,211 --> 00:13:18,374
直升机…

250
00:13:19,173 --> 00:13:22,131
不懂这招？没关系啦，那试试那个…

251
00:13:22,302 --> 00:13:23,257
铁鸡斗蜈蚣！

252
00:13:23,428 --> 00:13:24,668
这招好呀！

253
00:13:27,890 --> 00:13:29,676
说什么也好，都不可以

254
00:13:29,851 --> 00:13:32,263
又不懂？这么逊！

255
00:13:32,437 --> 00:13:34,894
那简单一点，人肉打桩机！

256
00:13:35,356 --> 00:13:37,517
等等，发生什么事？

257
00:13:38,192 --> 00:13:39,932
怎么样，这样就做不下去了

258
00:13:40,111 --> 00:13:42,818
我都明白　　　那就继续吧

259
00:13:43,281 --> 00:13:45,943
他们是投资者，照你意思做吧

260
00:13:46,743 --> 00:13:48,950
他们说做爱要循序渐进呢

261
00:13:49,162 --> 00:13:51,699
不是吧！还要循序渐进？

262
00:13:51,873 --> 00:13:53,363
看了几十年都是这样子

263
00:13:53,541 --> 00:13:55,748
你们AV界要突破呀，对不对？

264
00:13:55,918 --> 00:13:58,625
依我说呢，我们应该这样做，对不对？

265
00:13:58,796 --> 00:14:00,707
他说…

266
00:14:01,215 --> 00:14:02,921
你看不起我呀

267
00:14:03,092 --> 00:14:04,832
你们根本不懂AV，不闭嘴就给我滚

268
00:14:05,011 --> 00:14:07,627
什么不懂AV呀？我们全都是专业观众！

269
00:14:07,805 --> 00:14:09,545
神经病，看了几十年盗版AV

270
00:14:09,724 --> 00:14:11,885
我们不专业？你拍了多少年AV?

271
00:14:12,060 --> 00:14:13,095
你闭嘴！　　　我好怕喔我

272
00:14:13,269 --> 00:14:14,634
你不停在这里说三道四，有种跟我说日语

273
00:14:14,812 --> 00:14:15,597
你有没有专业道德呀？

274
00:14:15,772 --> 00:14:18,855
你们自己拍下去，我不拍了！

275
00:14:19,025 --> 00:14:21,266
神经病，这就跑了那么不专业

276
00:14:21,444 --> 00:14:22,058
还有道德吗？

277
00:14:22,236 --> 00:14:23,225
那怎么办？

278
00:14:23,988 --> 00:14:25,068
跑掉了呢！

279
00:14:25,239 --> 00:14:26,319
换另一个男优罗

280
00:14:26,491 --> 00:14:28,072
我跟你们说

281
00:14:28,242 --> 00:14:29,732
我只是中间人

282
00:14:30,161 --> 00:14:32,447
这片子的版权已经卖了

283
00:14:32,622 --> 00:14:35,079
如果交不出片子，你们要赔钱给我的

284
00:14:35,249 --> 00:14:36,705
什么？这么严重？

285
00:14:37,251 --> 00:14:38,832
你不做汉奸真浪费了你

286
00:14:39,170 --> 00:14:40,410
你怎知她不是？

287
00:14:40,588 --> 00:14:43,455
不如你们其中一个拍吧

288
00:14:43,758 --> 00:14:46,795
她问你们可不可以派个人出来代拍？

289
00:14:47,261 --> 00:14:49,798
这次真便宜了你们

290
00:14:49,972 --> 00:14:51,678
有得看，有得干

291
00:14:51,891 --> 00:14:52,971
爽死你们唷！

292
00:14:53,142 --> 00:14:54,552
神经！

293
00:14:54,894 --> 00:14:57,226
你去拍吧！神经病！

294
00:14:57,772 --> 00:15:00,309
你去吧！直升机呀你！

295
00:15:00,483 --> 00:15:02,769
别闹了，快找人来呀

296
00:15:04,112 --> 00:15:05,943
梁景，我真是很替你高兴

297
00:15:06,114 --> 00:15:07,103
我也想不到自己…

298
00:15:07,281 --> 00:15:09,488
带你来日本，还关照你这么好的差事

299
00:15:09,659 --> 00:15:11,991
事不宜迟，我马上去替你买红牛和安全套

300
00:15:12,161 --> 00:15:13,276
慢着…

301
00:15:13,621 --> 00:15:15,202
其实我真他妈的不行呀

302
00:15:15,456 --> 00:15:16,320
操你妈呀！

303
00:15:16,499 --> 00:15:18,831
刚才又说这又说那的，又什么直升机

304
00:15:19,001 --> 00:15:20,332
我也很想干呀

305
00:15:20,503 --> 00:15:22,118
但无奈我大腿内侧有块胎记

306
00:15:22,296 --> 00:15:23,126
很容易被认出的！

307
00:15:23,297 --> 00:15:24,912
靠，胎记这东西都长差不多形状啦

308
00:15:25,091 --> 00:15:25,329
不就是！

309
00:15:25,508 --> 00:15:28,090
真的很奇怪的，长的跟米老鼠一样的

310
00:15:28,302 --> 00:15:29,963
一进镜头，给人家告我侵权不就更糟？

311
00:15:30,138 --> 00:15:30,968
你还真多藉口的

312
00:15:31,139 --> 00:15:32,049
不…

313
00:15:32,223 --> 00:15:33,963
他不就行了
！你啊！

314
00:15:34,475 --> 00:15:35,430
你怎么看？

315
00:15:35,852 --> 00:15:36,967
我不行呀

316
00:15:37,186 --> 00:15:38,426
为什么不行

317
00:15:38,980 --> 00:15:40,311
我内弯

318
00:15:41,607 --> 00:15:42,847
啥米内弯？

319
00:15:44,944 --> 00:15:45,603
有没有见过

320
00:15:45,778 --> 00:15:46,858
开运竹？

321
00:15:52,493 --> 00:15:53,403
喂！阿达！

322
00:15:53,578 --> 00:15:55,489
你平常那么好色，你来吧！

323
00:15:55,663 --> 00:15:58,029
对不起，我今天真的要跟大家坦白

324
00:15:58,207 --> 00:15:59,868
其实我是一个拉子

325
00:16:00,042 --> 00:16:02,283
所以那天洗澡，我没脱内裤

326
00:16:02,462 --> 00:16:04,248
去你妈的，不是吧？!

327
00:16:04,422 --> 00:16:06,208
难怪你有胸！

328
00:16:06,382 --> 00:16:08,498
你们再不找人搞定他，找人砍死你们呀！

329
00:16:08,676 --> 00:16:09,586
操你妈的！

330
00:16:09,760 --> 00:16:11,216
喂！不要呀！

331
00:16:11,637 --> 00:16:13,502
日本的黑社会很凶的

332
00:16:13,681 --> 00:16:15,888
我认识一个人呀，买错了香烟而已…

333
00:16:16,058 --> 00:16:17,093
给人砍了左手尾指呀！

334
00:16:17,268 --> 00:16:18,849
那现在怎么办呀？

335
00:16:20,688 --> 00:16:22,178
你们听我说一句

336
00:16:23,357 --> 00:16:25,018
我们身为一个中国人

337
00:16:25,693 --> 00:16:27,354
难得有机会来到日本

338
00:16:27,653 --> 00:16:30,019
可以合情合理的

339
00:16:30,198 --> 00:16:32,530
用身体来惩罚一个日本妹

340
00:16:32,742 --> 00:16:35,279
你不要问国家为你们做了些什么

341
00:16:35,703 --> 00:16:36,863
我们问自己

342
00:16:37,079 --> 00:16:40,537
曾几何时为国家付出一分力！

343
00:16:41,501 --> 00:16:42,536
没错！

344
00:16:43,461 --> 00:16:44,997
我们要证明给日本妹知道

345
00:16:45,338 --> 00:16:47,169
我们中国人不是东亚病夫！

346
00:16:47,340 --> 00:16:49,797
钓鱼台是我们的！　　　钓鱼台是我们的！

347
00:16:49,967 --> 00:16:51,753
没错！辰巳唯也是我们的！

348
00:16:51,928 --> 00:16:56,922
我们的…

349
00:16:57,099 --> 00:16:58,179
好！

350
00:16:59,310 --> 00:17:00,766
我很开心

351
00:17:01,062 --> 00:17:02,643
看来大家都已经有答案了

352
00:17:03,064 --> 00:17:05,851
那请问，哪位想成为今晚的幸运儿呢？

353
00:17:06,192 --> 00:17:07,272
你！

354
00:17:08,110 --> 00:17:10,021
靠，傻猪呀！

355
00:17:14,825 --> 00:17:15,905
你好

356
00:17:16,911 --> 00:17:17,570
你好

357
00:17:17,745 --> 00:17:18,530
是

358
00:17:23,751 --> 00:17:24,365
谢谢

359
00:17:24,544 --> 00:17:25,579
是

360
00:17:28,130 --> 00:17:29,745
快脱她衣服呀，你妈的！

361
00:17:30,383 --> 00:17:31,748
脱啦，现在不就脱啦！

362
00:17:44,689 --> 00:17:45,929
快点啦，熬汤呀？

363
00:17:46,107 --> 00:17:47,438
你来呀！

364
00:17:50,278 --> 00:17:51,609
不好意思

365
00:18:01,455 --> 00:18:03,946
不要呀！不要呀！
不要…

366
00:18:04,125 --> 00:18:05,331
没关系

367
00:18:09,755 --> 00:18:11,040
不要呀！

368
00:18:17,305 --> 00:18:18,340
不要呀！

369
00:18:18,514 --> 00:18:19,629
不要呀！

370
00:18:19,807 --> 00:18:21,217
你放我走吧好不好

371
00:18:21,392 --> 00:18:22,552
我赔钱给你吧！

372
00:18:24,562 --> 00:18:29,147
脱衣服…

373
00:18:29,317 --> 00:18:31,433
脱裤子…

374
00:18:31,611 --> 00:18:32,896
不要呀…

375
00:18:33,070 --> 00:18:34,310
不要呀…

376
00:18:35,865 --> 00:18:36,945
不要呀…

377
00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:49,458
进去了！

378
00:19:03,267 --> 00:19:05,007
又进去了！

379
00:19:07,688 --> 00:19:08,598
啥东西？

380
00:19:08,773 --> 00:19:09,728
潮吹唷！

381
00:19:54,443 --> 00:19:56,399
你们很坏的

382
00:19:56,612 --> 00:19:59,228
要人家拍这些东西

383
00:20:02,326 --> 00:20:08,572
他好可爱，好搞笑呢

384
00:20:11,377 --> 00:20:13,459
未遇上小泽之前

385
00:20:14,547 --> 00:20:18,756
我从来都不知道女人可以做主动

386
00:20:21,345 --> 00:20:27,807
非常开心，但是又有点激动

387
00:20:36,193 --> 00:20:37,854
我觉得你在这戏里面

388
00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:39,230
真是好惨呀

389
00:20:39,447 --> 00:20:41,358
我看得泪汪汪呢

390
00:20:43,492 --> 00:20:46,074
你觉得可不可以多打点马赛克？

391
00:20:46,245 --> 00:20:46,950
不好意思

392
00:20:47,121 --> 00:20:48,110
是！

393
00:20:48,289 --> 00:20:50,951
那个…打马赛克，可以吗？

394
00:20:51,584 --> 00:20:52,289
好的好的，可以

395
00:20:52,460 --> 00:20:53,950
谢谢你

396
00:20:56,964 --> 00:20:58,374
喂！老兄呀！

397
00:20:58,632 --> 00:21:00,122
你不是这样吧，那马赛克…

398
00:21:00,301 --> 00:21:02,838
比牛油纸还薄呢，打厚一点行不行？

399
00:21:03,012 --> 00:21:05,253
还有你不要只打在我那话儿

400
00:21:05,473 --> 00:21:07,054
脸孔也要打，打在脸上

401
00:21:07,224 --> 00:21:08,304
不对…

402
00:21:08,476 --> 00:21:10,216
整张脸…整个人全打了

403
00:21:10,394 --> 00:21:12,476
这样…好的，好的

404
00:21:13,439 --> 00:21:15,805
也不对，整个画面全打了

405
00:21:23,115 --> 00:21:24,821
你真妈的不用担心

406
00:21:24,992 --> 00:21:26,152
你摘下眼镜

407
00:21:26,327 --> 00:21:27,783
没人认得你的

408
00:21:28,162 --> 00:21:29,652
你试试摘下眼镜

409
00:21:32,166 --> 00:21:33,372
你是谁呀？

410
00:21:33,542 --> 00:21:36,579
你别这样啦，你真的以为我是低能呀？

411
00:21:39,673 --> 00:21:41,038
我最初以为…

412
00:21:41,675 --> 00:21:44,508
女人脱衣服真的很大压力

413
00:21:45,304 --> 00:21:48,296
但是原来男人脱衣服更大压力

414
00:21:50,100 --> 00:21:51,806
算了，别说我了

415
00:21:52,186 --> 00:21:53,346
对了，老袁说你呢

416
00:21:53,521 --> 00:21:54,852
是香港过来的

417
00:21:55,898 --> 00:21:57,354
你没理由没中文名字吧

418
00:21:57,525 --> 00:21:59,061
难道你真的姓鸠？

419
00:22:00,778 --> 00:22:02,063
这么久了

420
00:22:02,279 --> 00:22:03,860
他妈的忘记了

421
00:22:06,700 --> 00:22:07,860
就是说…

422
00:22:08,118 --> 00:22:09,858
有不可告人的秘密了

423
00:22:11,956 --> 00:22:13,617
其实我留在日本

424
00:22:13,791 --> 00:22:17,079
是有一个他妈浪漫的原因呢

425
00:22:17,711 --> 00:22:19,201
我在等一个人

426
00:22:20,464 --> 00:22:21,704
你不问我在等谁？

427
00:22:21,882 --> 00:22:22,587
没有，我就不问

428
00:22:22,758 --> 00:22:24,214
让你无法说下去嘛

429
00:22:44,738 --> 00:22:46,820
我觉得好像发了一场梦一样

430
00:22:47,199 --> 00:22:50,066
我以为我的人生从此就跟AV画上句号

431
00:22:50,452 --> 00:22:51,532
殊不知

432
00:22:51,829 --> 00:22:54,070
原来只是刚刚开始

433
00:23:21,108 --> 00:23:23,269
“Sex Pistols”吧

434
00:23:29,700 --> 00:23:30,155
怎样啦，阿铭？

435
00:23:30,326 --> 00:23:32,282
陈伟文，你太牛逼啦！

436
00:23:32,453 --> 00:23:34,944
论坛上那条片，全世界都点赞喔！

437
00:23:35,122 --> 00:23:35,952
啥片呀？

438
00:23:36,123 --> 00:23:37,283
还装蒜？

439
00:23:37,458 --> 00:23:38,243
不是吧？

440
00:23:38,417 --> 00:23:39,372
那条AV片，“无垢男”呀！

441
00:23:39,543 --> 00:23:42,455
现在连结也打不开，大家都在疯狂转发？

442
00:23:42,630 --> 00:23:44,461
那女的叫什么？

443
00:23:44,632 --> 00:23:46,839
辰巳唯？哗，也蛮正的！

444
00:23:47,009 --> 00:23:48,294
去日本…

445
00:23:49,803 --> 00:23:51,293
亲子皇国也有？

446
00:23:51,805 --> 00:23:53,921
那么多网站都有？

447
00:23:55,643 --> 00:23:57,599
阿姐，那个不是我！

448
00:23:57,853 --> 00:23:59,343
不是喇！

449
00:23:59,521 --> 00:24:01,978
妈，那人不是我呀，妈！

450
00:24:09,698 --> 00:24:10,483
怎么啦，丝？

451
00:24:10,658 --> 00:24:13,365
陈伟文，你马上给我打开电视新闻台

452
00:24:13,702 --> 00:24:15,192
为什么呢？

453
00:24:30,636 --> 00:24:32,627
最近网上流传一条AV影片

454
00:24:32,805 --> 00:24:34,841
据说男主角，是一个香港人

455
00:24:35,015 --> 00:24:36,346
而影片流出之后

456
00:24:36,517 --> 00:24:38,348
香港网上一天的点击率

457
00:24:38,519 --> 00:24:39,725
已经破了纪录

458
00:24:39,895 --> 00:24:42,307
听说台湾和东南亚都一样

459
00:24:42,481 --> 00:24:43,846
而最令人意外的是

460
00:24:44,024 --> 00:24:45,013
这段影片

461
00:24:45,192 --> 00:24:47,308
在日本竟然掀起了热潮

462
00:24:47,486 --> 00:24:49,147
现在让我们驻日本的记者

463
00:24:49,321 --> 00:24:51,152
文嘉仪为大家报导

464
00:24:53,450 --> 00:24:55,361
自从影片在互联网传出

465
00:24:55,536 --> 00:24:57,527
后刮起了一阵旋风

466
00:24:57,705 --> 00:24:59,411
最近日本人气女性杂志

467
00:24:59,581 --> 00:25:01,697
读者票选出最想一夜情的男人

468
00:25:01,875 --> 00:25:05,083
这名香港男子更首度击败日本人气偶像

469
00:25:05,254 --> 00:25:06,494
成为第一名

470
00:25:06,714 --> 00:25:08,830
自从看了这条片之后

471
00:25:09,049 --> 00:25:11,711
我每晚都会梦见他

472
00:25:11,927 --> 00:25:15,886
我老公已经吃我不消了

473
00:25:16,140 --> 00:25:18,051
我觉得他好可爱

474
00:25:18,225 --> 00:25:20,386
以前的AV都是男人粗暴地征服女人

475
00:25:20,561 --> 00:25:22,142
现在角色调转

476
00:25:22,312 --> 00:25:26,646
我看得很过瘾

477
00:25:26,900 --> 00:25:29,937
是因为他将传统AV的男女角色互换了

478
00:25:30,112 --> 00:25:32,353
令一直觉得被AV轻视的女性

479
00:25:33,073 --> 00:25:37,567
内心的压抑突然被释放

480
00:25:37,745 --> 00:25:39,235
据说日本的成人电影公司

481
00:25:39,413 --> 00:25:40,653
最近收到很多电话

482
00:25:40,831 --> 00:25:42,913
大家都很想知道这名男子的真正身份

483
00:25:43,083 --> 00:25:44,994
而网上也有人发起搜索行动

484
00:25:45,169 --> 00:25:47,535
相信这名男子的身份很快会曝光

485
00:25:47,713 --> 00:25:49,874
无视新闻，文嘉仪在东京的报道

486
00:25:56,472 --> 00:25:58,303
对不起，这次真的是意外呀

487
00:25:58,474 --> 00:25:59,589
我以后不敢了

488
00:25:59,767 --> 00:26:02,679
我不是故意的，我是被迫的！

489
00:26:12,196 --> 00:26:13,231
阿丝，你别走呀！

490
00:26:13,405 --> 00:26:15,566
你走，我就死给你看！

491
00:26:36,303 --> 00:26:37,543
等等！

492
00:26:37,721 --> 00:26:39,131
等等！

493
00:26:40,390 --> 00:26:41,379
你认不认得我呀？

494
00:26:41,558 --> 00:26:43,139
我怎么会不认得你

495
00:26:43,894 --> 00:26:45,304
你就是日本那个鸠山呀

496
00:26:45,479 --> 00:26:48,471
对呀！为啥你要自杀那么傻逼呢？

497
00:26:49,066 --> 00:26:50,146
对了

498
00:26:50,442 --> 00:26:52,353
为啥我要自杀那么傻逼呢？

499
00:26:52,736 --> 00:26:54,317
如果我要死…

500
00:26:54,863 --> 00:26:55,727
我都先杀了你呀！

501
00:26:55,906 --> 00:26:56,520
你这混蛋！

502
00:26:56,698 --> 00:26:58,484
那些马赛克呀，害死我呀！

503
00:26:58,659 --> 00:27:00,320
我现在家破人亡了！

504
00:27:00,494 --> 00:27:02,405
你应该感谢那些马赛克才对

505
00:27:02,579 --> 00:27:04,115
你现在真火了

506
00:27:04,289 --> 00:27:07,122
全日本的AV公司都在找你呀

507
00:27:07,292 --> 00:27:08,202
他们说你是…

508
00:27:08,377 --> 00:27:10,038
“现象派男优”

509
00:27:10,337 --> 00:27:11,998
是女人看到你都兴奋呢

510
00:27:12,506 --> 00:27:13,336
真的？

511
00:27:13,507 --> 00:27:16,544
真的！有没有说你好像梁朝伟？

512
00:27:19,972 --> 00:27:20,757
其实呢

513
00:27:20,931 --> 00:27:23,388
你在香港，不死也没啥用了

514
00:27:23,600 --> 00:27:26,012
不如你跟我去日本，赚日圆

515
00:27:26,395 --> 00:27:29,637
全日本的女人都等着看你的身体呢

516
00:27:29,940 --> 00:27:33,182
人总有一死，不如把钱赚了才死呀

517
00:27:34,653 --> 00:27:36,860
真的那么多人想看我的身体？

518
00:27:37,364 --> 00:27:38,353
是呀

519
00:27:38,740 --> 00:27:40,401
我现在就想看了

520
00:27:42,369 --> 00:27:42,824
可是…

521
00:27:42,995 --> 00:27:43,780
我保证

522
00:27:43,954 --> 00:27:46,661
你会成为全日本系最红的AV男优

523
00:27:47,207 --> 00:27:49,539
请你接受我的邀请，和我合作

524
00:27:49,710 --> 00:27:51,371
让我做你经纪人吧！

525
00:27:57,676 --> 00:27:58,256
传说中香港男子

526
00:27:58,427 --> 00:27:59,542
正式以艺名“小泽马利奥”…

527
00:27:59,720 --> 00:28:01,836
进军日本！

528
00:28:02,014 --> 00:28:03,879
马利奥…

529
00:28:22,910 --> 00:28:25,868
以后在东京呢，你就住这里了

530
00:28:26,121 --> 00:28:28,032
不是东京的房子很小吗？

531
00:28:28,207 --> 00:28:29,162
这里这么大呀？

532
00:28:29,333 --> 00:28:31,198
你那话儿大嘛

533
00:28:31,793 --> 00:28:32,953
也对喔！

534
00:28:37,591 --> 00:28:38,421
不用收拾啦

535
00:28:38,592 --> 00:28:40,048
我不打飞机的

536
00:28:40,385 --> 00:28:42,091
这些是你的功课

537
00:28:42,387 --> 00:28:44,252
就是说多看多吸收，就做得好点吗？

538
00:28:44,473 --> 00:28:46,088
对呀！　　　不过也对啊

539
00:28:46,391 --> 00:28:49,428
我想我上次是被迫才做得到

540
00:28:49,978 --> 00:28:51,934
可是呢，那么多人在现场

541
00:28:52,105 --> 00:28:54,437
自愿我真怕自己做不来呀！

542
00:28:54,691 --> 00:28:55,350
不用怕

543
00:28:55,525 --> 00:28:57,891
到时候有很多大师傅在场

544
00:28:59,196 --> 00:29:00,436
不会是你吧？

545
00:29:00,781 --> 00:29:02,271
我不教人的

546
00:29:03,242 --> 00:29:06,279
用力点，就是“摸多”～

547
00:29:06,453 --> 00:29:07,863
“摸多”～

548
00:29:08,038 --> 00:29:10,700
一起来吧，就是“易咕”～

549
00:29:10,874 --> 00:29:12,489
“易咕”～

550
00:29:12,668 --> 00:29:16,001
好舒服呢，就是“奇摸鸡”～

551
00:29:16,171 --> 00:29:17,456
“奇摸鸡”～

552
00:29:17,631 --> 00:29:18,495
对

553
00:29:19,049 --> 00:29:20,459
可是你三个反应都一样的？

554
00:29:20,634 --> 00:29:21,999
它们是完全不同的

555
00:29:22,177 --> 00:29:23,633
是吗？

556
00:29:23,929 --> 00:29:25,794
那你要不要教我一点日文呢？

557
00:29:25,973 --> 00:29:27,964
日本呢，最重要呢

558
00:29:28,141 --> 00:29:29,631
就是“嗨渣拿”

559
00:29:30,143 --> 00:29:31,098
“超那妈”

560
00:29:31,270 --> 00:29:32,100
和“猪-嗨”

561
00:29:32,312 --> 00:29:34,428
“嗨渣拿”就是烟灰盅啦

562
00:29:34,773 --> 00:29:35,808
但“超那妈”是…

563
00:29:35,983 --> 00:29:37,598
“超那妈”是啤酒罗

564
00:29:38,402 --> 00:29:39,266
那谁是“猪-嗨”呀？

565
00:29:39,444 --> 00:29:42,311
“猪-嗨”是烧酒加滚水

566
00:29:43,073 --> 00:29:44,904
“猪-嗨”也有人喝呀？

567
00:29:45,325 --> 00:29:46,815
很受欢迎呢！

568
00:29:47,536 --> 00:29:49,026
在你正式拍AV之前

569
00:29:49,204 --> 00:29:52,321
我安排了你拜一位高人为师，向他学习

570
00:29:52,499 --> 00:29:54,410
增强床上的战斗力

571
00:29:58,797 --> 00:30:00,662
加藤鹰神之手？

572
00:30:03,468 --> 00:30:04,503
加藤先生

573
00:30:04,678 --> 00:30:06,214
请你收我为徒

574
00:30:07,723 --> 00:30:09,429
传授我绝世神功呀！

575
00:30:29,745 --> 00:30:31,531
发生了什么事呀？

576
00:30:33,665 --> 00:30:34,996
你看看

577
00:30:35,625 --> 00:30:37,616
地上有只苍蝇…

578
00:30:37,961 --> 00:30:40,043
刚被我搞到潮吹而死

579
00:30:40,380 --> 00:30:42,666
不是吧！

580
00:30:52,601 --> 00:30:54,387
你安息吧！

581
00:31:11,745 --> 00:31:13,656
师傅，你在干吗？

582
00:31:17,918 --> 00:31:21,911
离这里西南偏西20公里的大海已经潮吹

583
00:31:22,214 --> 00:31:23,750
波涛汹涌

584
00:31:24,257 --> 00:31:25,588
真的？

585
00:31:43,485 --> 00:31:43,940
用力点！

586
00:31:44,111 --> 00:31:45,146
是！

587
00:31:54,413 --> 00:31:55,573
快点！

588
00:31:56,081 --> 00:31:57,196
是！

589
00:31:57,666 --> 00:32:00,282
黄昏前挖不到蕃薯，今晚没饭吃！

590
00:32:00,502 --> 00:32:01,742
是！

591
00:32:02,462 --> 00:32:04,874
趁新鲜喝了它

592
00:32:05,048 --> 00:32:06,288
是

593
00:32:12,639 --> 00:32:14,254
其实我们中国人的传统

594
00:32:14,433 --> 00:32:16,674
最好的东西都是留给师傅的

595
00:32:19,980 --> 00:32:21,971
很好的传统

596
00:32:42,252 --> 00:32:43,492
去吧！

597
00:32:44,171 --> 00:32:45,661
小泽马利奥！

598
00:32:46,339 --> 00:32:48,421
你一定会成功！

599
00:32:49,593 --> 00:32:53,427
为AV开创新的天地啦！

600
00:32:55,932 --> 00:32:57,843
去吧！

601
00:33:12,032 --> 00:33:15,024
这些家伙奇形怪状的

602
00:33:15,202 --> 00:33:16,317
也是男优呀？

603
00:33:16,495 --> 00:33:18,577
他们叫做“汁男”

604
00:33:18,747 --> 00:33:20,487
专门替那些男优射精

605
00:33:20,707 --> 00:33:23,824
有时那些男优射不出来，或者早泄

606
00:33:24,002 --> 00:33:25,367
就得靠他们了

607
00:33:25,545 --> 00:33:28,127
拍AV的时候，拍射精近镜

608
00:33:28,298 --> 00:33:30,880
其实不是那些男优，是他们来的

609
00:33:31,218 --> 00:33:32,082
是这样喔！

610
00:33:32,260 --> 00:33:35,752
就好像那些武打巨星摔地的镜头就找替身

611
00:33:38,141 --> 00:33:40,507
他们射一次，就收一次钱

612
00:33:40,727 --> 00:33:42,433
所以不能软下来呀

613
00:33:43,313 --> 00:33:45,895
那怎么知道射了多少次？

614
00:33:46,358 --> 00:33:47,268
他们射一次

615
00:33:47,442 --> 00:33:49,228
手就圈一条橡皮筋

616
00:33:49,402 --> 00:33:50,562
所以他现在也未射

617
00:33:50,737 --> 00:33:51,943
就没有橡皮筋了

618
00:33:54,199 --> 00:33:55,860
不好意思，不好意思！

619
00:33:59,454 --> 00:34:02,412
兄弟，你想怎样呀？

620
00:34:02,582 --> 00:34:04,072
不好意思！

621
00:34:05,585 --> 00:34:07,621
这个学名叫“早泄”

622
00:34:12,759 --> 00:34:13,794
在调什么饮料呀？

623
00:34:13,969 --> 00:34:15,254
让我们要来补身的？

624
00:34:15,428 --> 00:34:17,168
这些是假精液

625
00:34:17,514 --> 00:34:19,379
他用一点香蕉汁

626
00:34:19,599 --> 00:34:22,432
然后加回练乳，再加三滴咖啡

627
00:34:22,936 --> 00:34:23,766
真他妈的像

628
00:34:23,937 --> 00:34:24,972
要不要试喝一点？

629
00:34:25,146 --> 00:34:26,932
也真的蛮像的，喝就不要了

630
00:34:27,107 --> 00:34:28,688
可是，为啥有汁男

631
00:34:28,858 --> 00:34:30,394
又用假精液呢？

632
00:34:30,610 --> 00:34:33,477
因为有时候要拍AV男优射精

633
00:34:33,655 --> 00:34:36,067
他射不出来，那我们呢…

634
00:34:37,993 --> 00:34:39,108
拿着…

635
00:34:39,411 --> 00:34:41,117
我们就装一条喉管

636
00:34:41,871 --> 00:34:43,281
就是放在那话儿下面？

637
00:34:43,540 --> 00:34:43,778
对呀！

638
00:34:43,957 --> 00:34:44,616
那怎么射呢？

639
00:34:44,791 --> 00:34:47,203
有个泵呀，一压

640
00:34:47,377 --> 00:34:48,287
会射好远的呢

641
00:34:48,461 --> 00:34:49,746
也真聪明！

642
00:34:49,921 --> 00:34:51,502
难怪我看那些AV女优

643
00:34:51,673 --> 00:34:54,289
有时候口爆、颜射那些

644
00:34:54,467 --> 00:34:55,547
吞得那么过瘾啦

645
00:34:55,719 --> 00:34:57,129
原来有香蕉汁

646
00:34:58,346 --> 00:34:59,802
那个不是麻生希吗？

647
00:35:00,140 --> 00:35:01,801
是呀，今天你和她拍呀

648
00:35:02,058 --> 00:35:02,843
不是吧？

649
00:35:03,018 --> 00:35:04,349
好大压力喔！

650
00:35:06,146 --> 00:35:07,306
麻生希小姐

651
00:35:07,522 --> 00:35:10,764
小泽马利奥今天第一次正式拍AV

652
00:35:10,942 --> 00:35:11,681
请麻生小姐指教指教

653
00:35:11,860 --> 00:35:13,066
请多多指教

654
00:35:13,236 --> 00:35:14,521
不用客气

655
00:35:14,696 --> 00:35:16,732
之前已经看过小泽先生的作品

656
00:35:17,365 --> 00:35:19,651
觉得你真的好可爱

657
00:35:20,785 --> 00:35:22,025
不知道小泽先生身体

658
00:35:22,203 --> 00:35:23,864
最敏感的部位是哪里呢？

659
00:35:24,164 --> 00:35:26,155
她问你最敏感是哪里呢？

660
00:35:26,499 --> 00:35:27,659
全身嘛！

661
00:35:28,168 --> 00:35:29,499
全身！

662
00:35:31,004 --> 00:35:32,835
小泽先生真的好风趣

663
00:35:33,006 --> 00:35:34,962
我最喜欢风趣的男人了

664
00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:41,795
耳朵

665
00:35:47,020 --> 00:35:48,430
乳头

666
00:35:50,482 --> 00:35:51,517
不要…

667
00:35:51,691 --> 00:35:52,271
不要…

668
00:35:52,442 --> 00:35:53,557
老师…

669
00:35:53,735 --> 00:35:55,020
老师不要…

670
00:35:56,446 --> 00:35:57,356
不要…

671
00:35:57,530 --> 00:35:58,360
老师…

672
00:35:58,531 --> 00:36:00,021
不要…

673
00:36:01,868 --> 00:36:04,780
记住，挣扎一会儿就要放弃

674
00:36:05,413 --> 00:36:07,495
因为你已经开始想要

675
00:36:07,874 --> 00:36:10,365
挣扎太久观众会不耐烦

676
00:36:10,669 --> 00:36:11,658
总之奥义就是…

677
00:36:11,836 --> 00:36:14,703
“三下反抗，一下迎合”

678
00:36:14,964 --> 00:36:16,374
明白吗？

679
00:36:17,050 --> 00:36:18,711
有一点不能忘记

680
00:36:19,386 --> 00:36:22,753
两人之间绝对没有“不可能”

681
00:36:23,056 --> 00:36:24,717
是这样的

682
00:36:25,016 --> 00:36:26,506
谢谢您！

683
00:36:48,498 --> 00:36:51,365
我一定要跟他来一炮

684
00:37:03,263 --> 00:37:04,924
读几年级呀？

685
00:37:05,473 --> 00:37:06,428
中一

686
00:37:08,309 --> 00:37:10,265
这把年纪不就是留了很多年级！

687
00:37:10,437 --> 00:37:11,927
一定是他妈的蠢货！

688
00:37:12,230 --> 00:37:13,470
小泽同学

689
00:37:13,648 --> 00:37:14,808
是！

690
00:37:24,951 --> 00:37:26,407
小泽同学

691
00:37:28,246 --> 00:37:29,782
到你检查身体

692
00:37:30,999 --> 00:37:32,739
医生你好！

693
00:37:35,128 --> 00:37:36,834
今年几岁？

694
00:37:37,297 --> 00:37:38,628
十三

695
00:37:40,884 --> 00:37:42,545
上床，脱衣服

696
00:37:43,178 --> 00:37:44,213
是

697
00:38:03,823 --> 00:38:06,235
老师，你做什么？

698
00:38:09,662 --> 00:38:12,495
我在替你检查乳头的反应

699
00:38:13,333 --> 00:38:14,869
是正常的

700
00:38:15,251 --> 00:38:19,665
我还要看看你小弟弟是偏左，还是偏右

701
00:38:38,441 --> 00:38:40,773
你现在看到我做什么？

702
00:38:41,069 --> 00:38:42,650
脱衣服

703
00:38:43,571 --> 00:38:48,190
你眼睛有问题

704
00:38:49,494 --> 00:38:51,485
出现幻觉

705
00:38:55,834 --> 00:38:58,325
老师，你干嘛呀？

706
00:38:58,878 --> 00:39:01,494
我好怕怕呀！

707
00:39:04,467 --> 00:39:05,798
不要…

708
00:39:06,928 --> 00:39:09,214
不要…

709
00:39:10,682 --> 00:39:12,593
不要…

710
00:39:13,184 --> 00:39:14,390
不要…

711
00:39:20,149 --> 00:39:21,810
发育得相当完整

712
00:39:21,985 --> 00:39:24,021
比间尺还长

713
00:39:27,282 --> 00:39:28,397
不要…

714
00:39:28,616 --> 00:39:30,322
老师不要…

715
00:39:30,827 --> 00:39:32,442
小泽同学

716
00:39:32,745 --> 00:39:35,487
以下你看到的，和你做的

717
00:39:35,665 --> 00:39:37,826
全部都是幻觉

718
00:39:46,801 --> 00:39:49,167
老师，舒服…

719
00:39:52,098 --> 00:39:53,884
要来了…

720
00:39:55,059 --> 00:39:56,469
一起来吧

721
00:40:06,613 --> 00:40:09,150
谢谢老师！

722
00:40:09,324 --> 00:40:10,655
停！

723
00:40:10,825 --> 00:40:12,281
好！做得好！

724
00:40:15,955 --> 00:40:18,037
谢谢你

725
00:40:18,249 --> 00:40:19,238
是不是很开心？

726
00:40:19,417 --> 00:40:19,872
很开心

727
00:40:20,043 --> 00:40:21,954
介不介意替我拿张卫生纸？流出来了！

728
00:40:22,170 --> 00:40:24,035
卫生纸！

729
00:40:26,966 --> 00:40:29,173
马利奥…

730
00:40:37,936 --> 00:40:39,346
你好！

731
00:40:39,812 --> 00:40:41,018
你好！

732
00:40:45,777 --> 00:40:47,017
马利奥？

733
00:40:47,779 --> 00:40:50,111
不是，我很明显是张家辉啦！

734
00:40:50,865 --> 00:40:52,480
真是马利奥！

735
00:40:53,451 --> 00:40:54,566
我爱你！

736
00:40:54,744 --> 00:40:56,325
不要！

737
00:40:59,666 --> 00:41:04,581
和马利奥合作的女优由我挑选

738
00:41:04,796 --> 00:41:06,457
是的，当然是

739
00:41:15,431 --> 00:41:16,887
社长，电话

740
00:41:17,934 --> 00:41:19,299
这个…

741
00:41:20,687 --> 00:41:21,847
喂？

742
00:43:27,980 --> 00:43:29,265
等等…

743
00:43:29,732 --> 00:43:30,892
那个…

744
00:43:31,067 --> 00:43:32,932
是多大个cup呢？

745
00:43:33,861 --> 00:43:34,976
L-cup !

746
00:43:35,196 --> 00:43:36,311
L-cup ?

747
00:43:36,489 --> 00:43:38,605
A、B、C、D、E、F、G

748
00:43:38,783 --> 00:43:40,489
H、I、J、K、L

749
00:43:40,660 --> 00:43:43,026
操你妈的，真他妈的巨大！

750
00:43:57,343 --> 00:43:59,959
不要…

751
00:44:02,265 --> 00:44:03,846
不要…

752
00:44:04,475 --> 00:44:05,931
救命呀！

753
00:44:06,936 --> 00:44:08,346
救命呀！

754
00:44:15,862 --> 00:44:17,818
你逃不掉了

755
00:44:18,781 --> 00:44:21,693
还是乖乖就范吧

756
00:44:22,410 --> 00:44:26,403
给我玩完，再满足这里所有女人

757
00:44:27,206 --> 00:44:29,162
不要…

758
00:44:30,376 --> 00:44:31,957
不要…

759
00:44:32,253 --> 00:44:35,541
不要…

760
00:44:44,974 --> 00:44:48,262
救命，救我呀

761
00:44:48,936 --> 00:44:50,927
我不可以就这样死在这里的

762
00:44:51,272 --> 00:44:52,512
我要想办法

763
00:44:52,773 --> 00:44:54,980
我要用幻想对抗你的呢！

764
00:45:45,952 --> 00:45:47,408
好！停机！

765
00:45:50,373 --> 00:45:55,367
辛苦了！　　　辛苦了！

766
00:46:01,968 --> 00:46:04,880
阿丝，我以为你不再听我电话了

767
00:46:05,137 --> 00:46:06,627
你有没有收到我送给你的包包？

768
00:46:06,806 --> 00:46:08,137
收到啦

769
00:46:09,600 --> 00:46:10,965
我以为你会生我气

770
00:46:11,143 --> 00:46:13,759
其实呢，我也接受现实了

771
00:46:13,938 --> 00:46:17,101
现在这个世界也是笑贫不笑娼

772
00:46:17,275 --> 00:46:19,357
你也不用太介怀人家怎么看你的

773
00:46:19,527 --> 00:46:20,687
我没有呀

774
00:46:20,987 --> 00:46:22,443
我只介意你怎么看我

775
00:46:22,613 --> 00:46:24,604
人家都说不介意了

776
00:46:24,865 --> 00:46:26,196
我不说了，要把头发吹干

777
00:46:26,367 --> 00:46:28,198
再跟你说吧，拜拜

778
00:46:50,099 --> 00:46:51,339
我操你呀！

779
00:46:51,517 --> 00:46:52,757
你死去哪里啦？

780
00:46:52,935 --> 00:46:54,266
他妈的把我的钱都拿了

781
00:46:54,437 --> 00:46:56,268
还留下一笔高利贷给我！

782
00:46:56,439 --> 00:46:57,474
是我混蛋

783
00:46:58,858 --> 00:47:00,018
你打死我吧！

784
00:47:00,192 --> 00:47:02,683
操你…

785
00:47:05,489 --> 00:47:07,445
你现在那么有钱

786
00:47:08,075 --> 00:47:10,862
捧红了那个小泽马利奥

787
00:47:11,704 --> 00:47:14,195
又不见你捧我？

788
00:47:18,044 --> 00:47:21,582
你已经不爱我了

789
00:47:23,341 --> 00:47:26,424
我不可以忍受你和别的女人上床的

790
00:47:26,761 --> 00:47:30,253
无论你怎样，我都那么爱你的

791
00:47:31,640 --> 00:47:33,471
那你证明呀

792
00:47:43,027 --> 00:47:44,892
我不客气了

793
00:48:40,126 --> 00:48:42,492
对不起…不好意思…

794
00:48:43,963 --> 00:48:44,622
谢谢！

795
00:48:44,797 --> 00:48:47,129
不好意思…对不起…

796
00:48:48,759 --> 00:48:50,545
有钱人喔！

797
00:48:56,350 --> 00:48:57,681
替我捉住那混蛋

798
00:48:57,893 --> 00:48:58,757
妈的别给他走！

799
00:48:58,936 --> 00:49:00,426
哪个混蛋？

800
00:49:00,646 --> 00:49:02,352
我不就是混蛋罗！

801
00:49:03,149 --> 00:49:03,683
这个？

802
00:49:03,858 --> 00:49:05,974
对呀，你旁边那个呀！

803
00:49:16,495 --> 00:49:18,611
我真他妈的傻逼蠢货！

804
00:49:19,039 --> 00:49:20,495
我明知道哥儿是骗我的

805
00:49:20,666 --> 00:49:23,123
我都给他再来一炮

806
00:49:23,377 --> 00:49:25,584
你知不知道他刺得我最痛的是哪里？

807
00:49:26,255 --> 00:49:27,836
是心呀！

808
00:49:28,591 --> 00:49:31,378
我以前给日本仔骗我来日本

809
00:49:31,677 --> 00:49:34,635
在歌舞伎町呀，做风俗娘呢！

810
00:49:34,847 --> 00:49:35,882
你做风俗娘？

811
00:49:36,056 --> 00:49:39,514
帮人家马杀鸡，推油呀、出火呀

812
00:49:39,685 --> 00:49:40,925
我很厉害耶

813
00:49:41,103 --> 00:49:43,310
九十分钟赚三万日圆？

814
00:50:05,794 --> 00:50:08,331
后来广也哥儿爱上了我

815
00:50:08,547 --> 00:50:09,787
我不就给他放题罗

816
00:50:10,049 --> 00:50:13,041
他是我的客人嘛，又那么爱我

817
00:50:13,260 --> 00:50:14,340
我就不收他钱罗

818
00:50:14,512 --> 00:50:16,218
他妈的把我的钱都骗光了

819
00:50:16,388 --> 00:50:18,049
还丢下一笔高利贷给我

820
00:50:18,224 --> 00:50:20,385
所有男人都是这样骗女人的

821
00:50:20,559 --> 00:50:23,016
总之一个男人一看见你，就说很喜欢你

822
00:50:23,187 --> 00:50:24,347
他就是他妈的在骗你

823
00:50:24,522 --> 00:50:26,058
我反过来想的

824
00:50:26,315 --> 00:50:29,352
我以为你说不喜欢我，是喜欢我呢

825
00:50:29,944 --> 00:50:30,933
那你喜不喜欢我？

826
00:50:31,111 --> 00:50:32,692
我从来不骗人的

827
00:50:34,782 --> 00:50:38,115
爱情真是他妈的累人

828
00:50:40,120 --> 00:50:43,658
哥儿哥儿哥儿哥…

829
00:50:46,085 --> 00:50:47,416
你怎么了？

830
00:50:48,337 --> 00:50:49,998
你不是那么笨吧？

831
00:50:50,297 --> 00:50:51,412
唉，糟了！

832
00:50:53,133 --> 00:50:54,964
为什么我的脚不用走

833
00:50:55,135 --> 00:50:56,545
它也走着呢？

834
00:50:56,804 --> 00:50:59,386
你刚才喝的啤酒，是新发明

835
00:50:59,557 --> 00:51:00,672
喝了会飞的

836
00:51:01,600 --> 00:51:04,216
你当我傻逼！

837
00:51:04,603 --> 00:51:06,514
你在背着我嘛！

838
00:51:07,273 --> 00:51:08,729
谢谢你

839
00:51:10,359 --> 00:51:12,896
又会这么蠢也这么重的

840
00:51:17,116 --> 00:51:18,777
对，可以了

841
00:51:18,993 --> 00:51:20,108
谢谢你

842
00:51:20,452 --> 00:51:21,612
是！

843
00:51:21,954 --> 00:51:23,319
哗！很帅呀！

844
00:51:23,497 --> 00:51:24,657
有多帅呢？

845
00:51:25,082 --> 00:51:26,618
你侧面的分界真是一绝呀

846
00:51:26,792 --> 00:51:27,747
是吗？

847
00:51:27,918 --> 00:51:28,532
那我想问问你

848
00:51:28,711 --> 00:51:30,952
这一身造型是拍什么戏呢？

849
00:51:31,130 --> 00:51:33,291
今天是拍你做宇宙大王　　　这样…

850
00:51:33,465 --> 00:51:35,706
给美少女战士捉走了　　　是这样的…

851
00:51:35,884 --> 00:51:36,839
先奸后杀　　　是

852
00:51:37,011 --> 00:51:37,921
杀完再奸

853
00:51:38,095 --> 00:51:40,086
死了也继续奸，好点子

854
00:51:40,389 --> 00:51:41,925
那谁做美少女呀？

855
00:51:42,099 --> 00:51:43,964
淮山杞子呀，新人来的

856
00:51:44,310 --> 00:51:45,550
那她经纪人会不会叫…

857
00:51:45,728 --> 00:51:46,763
“根本刁斯”呢？

858
00:51:48,397 --> 00:51:49,432
你好！

859
00:51:49,607 --> 00:51:50,767
你好…

860
00:51:50,941 --> 00:51:52,647
杞子她是第一次拍AV

861
00:51:52,818 --> 00:51:55,400
请小泽先生多多指教

862
00:51:55,571 --> 00:51:56,981
来吧，杞子！

863
00:51:57,406 --> 00:51:58,691
你好，多多指教

864
00:51:58,907 --> 00:52:00,317
请多多指教

865
00:52:00,492 --> 00:52:01,732
经纪人相当屌丝

866
00:52:01,910 --> 00:52:03,571
好像我那么屌丝呀！

867
00:52:04,955 --> 00:52:06,946
她很可爱呢！

868
00:52:10,002 --> 00:52:11,708
不要…

869
00:52:12,004 --> 00:52:13,710
不要…

870
00:52:16,592 --> 00:52:16,876
大…

871
00:52:17,051 --> 00:52:18,291
大魔王…

872
00:52:20,220 --> 00:52:24,338
你滥杀无辜，罪恶满刑…

873
00:52:27,936 --> 00:52:29,346
受死啦…

874
00:52:29,688 --> 00:52:31,178
对！

875
00:52:32,483 --> 00:52:34,519
你不要奸我

876
00:52:34,693 --> 00:52:35,899
你可以杀我

877
00:52:36,111 --> 00:52:37,851
可是你千万别搞我的小弟弟

878
00:52:38,030 --> 00:52:39,986
这是我的死穴

879
00:52:40,157 --> 00:52:41,363
不过你捉了我…

880
00:52:41,533 --> 00:52:44,275
我任你处置吧，来吧！

881
00:52:51,543 --> 00:52:53,955
我要你…死前…

882
00:52:56,048 --> 00:52:58,289
受尽屈辱

883
00:53:22,324 --> 00:53:25,441
不要…

884
00:54:11,248 --> 00:54:12,579
淮山，你不可以这样的！

885
00:54:12,750 --> 00:54:15,833
没关系　　　淮山，等等…

886
00:54:16,003 --> 00:54:17,288
我去搞定她

887
00:54:17,463 --> 00:54:20,580
很抱歉，真的非常抱歉！

888
00:54:28,640 --> 00:54:30,255
我没有恶意的

889
00:56:44,484 --> 00:56:46,600
AV有多大压力

890
00:56:46,904 --> 00:56:48,269
我很清楚

891
00:56:49,072 --> 00:56:51,233
我都不太喜欢拍AV的

892
00:56:52,284 --> 00:56:54,115
不过看来也不适合你

893
00:56:54,912 --> 00:56:56,448
你走吧！

894
00:56:58,874 --> 00:57:00,956
是不是我的日文太烂呀？

895
00:57:01,126 --> 00:57:02,241
明白吗？

896
00:57:02,419 --> 00:57:04,785
可是我和经纪人签了合约

897
00:57:05,005 --> 00:57:07,496
毁约要赔很多钱的

898
00:57:07,758 --> 00:57:08,793
没问题

899
00:57:08,967 --> 00:57:10,832
我有钱

900
00:57:11,345 --> 00:57:12,460
行了！

901
00:57:15,307 --> 00:57:16,513
再见…

902
00:57:19,353 --> 00:57:20,718
再见…

903
00:57:22,481 --> 00:57:23,846
走吧！

904
00:57:33,325 --> 00:57:34,735
小泽先生

905
00:57:35,661 --> 00:57:37,151
我觉得跟你拍，我可以的

906
00:57:38,163 --> 00:57:40,370
不过小泽先生可不可以帮我一个忙？

907
00:57:41,833 --> 00:57:43,039
什么忙？

908
00:57:43,543 --> 00:57:45,158
就是拍AV之前

909
00:57:45,420 --> 00:57:47,160
请小泽先生和我拍拖

910
00:57:47,673 --> 00:57:49,504
给我一些恋爱的感觉

911
00:57:49,675 --> 00:57:51,666
那样我一定会拍很好的

912
00:58:04,648 --> 00:58:05,854
鲔鱼腩寿司？

913
00:58:08,902 --> 00:58:09,482
鲔鱼腩，可以吗？

914
00:58:09,653 --> 00:58:11,189
很喜欢

915
00:58:16,576 --> 00:58:17,691
晚饭可以吗？

916
00:58:17,869 --> 00:58:18,858
可以呀

917
00:58:19,204 --> 00:58:21,320
但是下次先换衣服

918
00:58:21,498 --> 00:58:24,035
我们这身打扮比较怪

919
00:58:24,209 --> 00:58:26,666
我也这样觉得

920
00:59:41,912 --> 00:59:45,075
一定是鸠山把衣服拿回来

921
01:00:18,323 --> 01:00:19,529
那…

922
01:00:20,158 --> 01:00:22,490
就是说我们穿得那么光鲜

923
01:00:23,495 --> 01:00:25,326
而且又那么整齐

924
01:00:26,331 --> 01:00:27,741
就是没事啦！

925
01:00:28,291 --> 01:00:30,031
我有说你有做过吗？

926
01:00:30,377 --> 01:00:31,787
心虚啊？

927
01:00:33,421 --> 01:00:35,207
也不是心虚

928
01:00:35,382 --> 01:00:37,168
只是三个字…

929
01:00:37,634 --> 01:00:38,999
措手不及

930
01:00:43,014 --> 01:00:44,550
香港女朋友

931
01:00:47,060 --> 01:00:49,142
那我先走了

932
01:00:49,396 --> 01:00:51,352
明天见

933
01:00:53,567 --> 01:00:56,104
我们刚刚收工嘛

934
01:00:56,444 --> 01:00:58,400
然后她…

935
01:01:29,895 --> 01:01:30,680
操我呀！

936
01:01:30,854 --> 01:01:33,015
我要你像在AV？操那些女人一样的操我！

937
01:01:33,231 --> 01:01:33,936
不要呀！

938
01:01:34,107 --> 01:01:36,268
我今天拍了四场戏，我做不到了

939
01:01:36,443 --> 01:01:37,933
不许不要！

940
01:02:31,539 --> 01:02:33,450
宇宙大魔王，我不会放过你

941
01:02:33,625 --> 01:02:35,286
别走！

942
01:02:37,337 --> 01:02:38,827
别走！

943
01:02:39,214 --> 01:02:40,454
等等…

944
01:02:57,482 --> 01:02:58,813
等等…

945
01:03:13,790 --> 01:03:15,997
就算只得一天

946
01:03:16,960 --> 01:03:19,793
我也要完全拥有你

947
01:03:56,458 --> 01:03:57,789
这一刻

948
01:03:58,126 --> 01:04:00,538
我深深体会到原来妒忌心

949
01:04:01,046 --> 01:04:02,911
可以将一个女人改变

950
01:04:03,631 --> 01:04:05,462
将一个女人推得那么尽

951
01:04:09,012 --> 01:04:11,924
这一次，是我拍AV以来

952
01:04:12,724 --> 01:04:14,965
第一次有爱情的感觉

953
01:04:33,787 --> 01:04:34,867
喂？

954
01:04:35,080 --> 01:04:37,241
席梦丝，你现在在哪？

955
01:04:37,415 --> 01:04:40,407
我在日本旅行呀，刚刚去了血拚呀

956
01:04:41,127 --> 01:04:41,991
血拚？

957
01:04:42,170 --> 01:04:44,081
你男友是小泽马利奥的事被爆料了

958
01:04:44,255 --> 01:04:46,462
现在大陆出版社说你形象有问题

959
01:04:46,674 --> 01:04:47,413
暂停出版你的书

960
01:04:47,592 --> 01:04:50,004
还喊停了你进入大陆市场的计划

961
01:04:56,559 --> 01:04:58,766
欢迎大家收看“理有理讲”

962
01:04:58,937 --> 01:05:01,019
这集我们请来两位嘉宾

963
01:05:01,189 --> 01:05:03,601
讨论一个非常热门的话题

964
01:05:03,775 --> 01:05:05,936
首先，在我身旁的是…

965
01:05:06,236 --> 01:05:11,776
道德调整…道德调理整…理会会长

966
01:05:11,950 --> 01:05:14,737
兼资深AV人

967
01:05:14,911 --> 01:05:19,826
兼香港精神分裂协会荣誉会长

968
01:05:19,999 --> 01:05:22,285
人称“玉面飞龙”的…

969
01:05:22,460 --> 01:05:23,825
毛胶卫先生

970
01:05:24,129 --> 01:05:25,494
是毛高卫！

971
01:05:25,672 --> 01:05:27,333
不好意思，毛胶卫先生

972
01:05:29,092 --> 01:05:31,799
另外一位就是我们的纯爱小说女王

973
01:05:31,970 --> 01:05:33,210
席梦丝小姐

974
01:05:33,388 --> 01:05:36,380
和我们讨论一下一个热门话题

975
01:05:36,641 --> 01:05:39,178
就是有一位香港男人

976
01:05:39,352 --> 01:05:42,059
无缘无故的走去日本当AV男优

977
01:05:42,230 --> 01:05:45,848
被女人淫辱而走红的奇怪现象

978
01:05:46,067 --> 01:05:47,557
毛先生，你怎么看？

979
01:05:47,777 --> 01:05:49,187
我必须大力谴责

980
01:05:49,362 --> 01:05:51,899
这个化名为小泽马利奥的男人

981
01:05:52,115 --> 01:05:54,822
他简直丧尽天良，丢尽香港男人的脸子

982
01:05:54,993 --> 01:05:55,778
你们知道吗？

983
01:05:55,952 --> 01:05:57,317
看了他AV的男人

984
01:05:57,495 --> 01:05:59,156
起码有四成是从此不举的

985
01:05:59,330 --> 01:06:01,742
有三成就是举了起来，软不下来

986
01:06:01,916 --> 01:06:04,328
有两成就是鬼鬼祟祟地举

987
01:06:04,502 --> 01:06:06,367
鬼鬼祟祟地软下来

988
01:06:06,754 --> 01:06:07,869
还有一些特例

989
01:06:08,047 --> 01:06:10,254
有少数分子看了AV之后

990
01:06:10,425 --> 01:06:11,210
居然吐奶！

991
01:06:11,384 --> 01:06:13,500
这可真是好危险喔！　　　当然啦！

992
01:06:13,761 --> 01:06:15,877
那席梦丝小姐，你有怎么看呢？

993
01:06:16,055 --> 01:06:18,341
最近有一本周刊爆料

994
01:06:18,516 --> 01:06:21,508
说你和这个小泽马利奥是闺密喔！

995
01:06:24,105 --> 01:06:25,845
我要发出严正声明

996
01:06:26,024 --> 01:06:29,107
我和这个小泽马利奥已经没有任何关系

997
01:06:29,569 --> 01:06:31,025
我之所以和他划清界线

998
01:06:31,196 --> 01:06:32,185
是因为他的所作所为

999
01:06:32,363 --> 01:06:34,775
令我极度讨厌、非常羞耻！

1000
01:06:35,033 --> 01:06:39,197
好，现在有家庭观众打电话来表达意见

1001
01:06:39,871 --> 01:06:42,203
是，电话已经接通了，请说

1002
01:06:42,582 --> 01:06:45,540
杜小姐，麻烦你，和席梦丝说

1003
01:06:45,877 --> 01:06:48,710
这里在座的每个人都可以说我…

1004
01:06:49,130 --> 01:06:50,040
是

1005
01:06:51,841 --> 01:06:53,547
就你不可以！

1006
01:06:55,178 --> 01:06:57,169
小泽马利奥呀！

1007
01:06:57,388 --> 01:06:59,629
各位家庭观众、现场观众…

1008
01:07:00,225 --> 01:07:03,467
小泽马利奥呀！来了我们的节目呀！

1009
01:07:03,645 --> 01:07:05,636
我有一点点想吐奶呀！

1010
01:07:08,316 --> 01:07:11,399
我求求你了！你不要再伤害我了！

1011
01:07:11,653 --> 01:07:12,859
对呀，伤害都轻力点…

1012
01:07:13,029 --> 01:07:14,235
是谁说的…

1013
01:07:15,323 --> 01:07:17,234
是谁说的做什么也不要紧

1014
01:07:17,408 --> 01:07:18,864
笑贪不笑娼

1015
01:07:19,035 --> 01:07:20,900
最要紧是赚到钱呀？

1016
01:07:25,750 --> 01:07:28,241
那你知不知道你现在害我大陆不可以出书

1017
01:07:28,419 --> 01:07:30,250
我没了十几亿的市场呀？

1018
01:07:30,505 --> 01:07:32,871
这就是我们分手的原因是吧？

1019
01:07:33,424 --> 01:07:35,961
谢谢你，我明白了…

1020
01:07:36,761 --> 01:07:38,922
我也没有大陆市场，我也没饿死

1021
01:07:39,138 --> 01:07:40,753
你别走

1022
01:07:47,772 --> 01:07:49,353
你去死吧！

1023
01:07:59,284 --> 01:08:00,774
哗，好精彩呀！

1024
01:08:00,952 --> 01:08:03,409
刚才公说公有理，婆说婆有理

1025
01:08:03,580 --> 01:08:05,912
毛先生，你见证了这个历史时刻

1026
01:08:06,082 --> 01:08:07,868
你会站在哪一边呢？

1027
01:08:08,084 --> 01:08:09,449
我有少少伤感

1028
01:08:09,794 --> 01:08:11,125
村上春树说过

1029
01:08:11,296 --> 01:08:13,457
如果一面高墙和一只鸡蛋中间

1030
01:08:13,631 --> 01:08:15,292
他一定站在鸡蛋那边

1031
01:08:15,466 --> 01:08:17,002
作为一个男人

1032
01:08:17,385 --> 01:08:18,795
在女人的高跟鞋

1033
01:08:18,970 --> 01:08:20,255
和蛋蛋中间

1034
01:08:20,471 --> 01:08:22,336
我一定站在蛋蛋那边

1035
01:08:23,141 --> 01:08:23,971
可惜呀

1036
01:08:24,142 --> 01:08:27,225
他的蛋蛋似乎已经给人踢爆了

1037
01:08:27,562 --> 01:08:28,768
可怜…

1038
01:08:28,938 --> 01:08:29,973
阿丝这一脚

1039
01:08:30,148 --> 01:08:31,684
我住了几天医院

1040
01:08:32,358 --> 01:08:34,474
虽然医生说我小弟弟没什么事

1041
01:08:35,111 --> 01:08:36,521
可是我都决定了…

1042
01:08:36,988 --> 01:08:38,524
退出AV界

1043
01:08:48,541 --> 01:08:49,951
我想说…

1044
01:08:50,168 --> 01:08:51,829
我不想再做小泽马利奥了

1045
01:08:52,003 --> 01:08:53,584
小泽是时候退休

1046
01:08:53,880 --> 01:08:55,370
去一个完全没人认识的地方！

1047
01:08:57,300 --> 01:08:59,632
他妈的哪有没人认识你的地方呢？

1048
01:09:00,178 --> 01:09:03,591
我刚刚把你的AV卖去了南美和东欧

1049
01:09:03,806 --> 01:09:05,387
除非你去非洲吧

1050
01:09:06,351 --> 01:09:07,841
你不要这样好不好？

1051
01:09:08,061 --> 01:09:10,894
你已经在我身上赚了很多钱，对不对？

1052
01:09:11,356 --> 01:09:12,846
总之我这阵子赚的钱

1053
01:09:13,024 --> 01:09:14,059
你抽了佣金后还给我

1054
01:09:14,233 --> 01:09:15,848
我要走了

1055
01:09:19,530 --> 01:09:21,270
你他妈的有没有想过你走了我怎么办？

1056
01:09:21,491 --> 01:09:22,901
合约我都签了

1057
01:09:23,409 --> 01:09:24,194
赔死我呀

1058
01:09:24,369 --> 01:09:26,655
那陈静不也一样？怎样了？

1059
01:09:27,413 --> 01:09:29,745
你还不还给我也好，你怎样算都好

1060
01:09:29,916 --> 01:09:32,032
我决定要走了，好不好？

1061
01:09:36,756 --> 01:09:38,087
再见

1062
01:10:21,092 --> 01:10:22,753
小泽马利奥！

1063
01:10:23,845 --> 01:10:25,085
全都是你的！

1064
01:10:25,346 --> 01:10:26,426
妈的别再回来

1065
01:10:26,597 --> 01:10:27,928
好好的过生活

1066
01:10:30,601 --> 01:10:31,636
那你有什么打算？

1067
01:10:31,811 --> 01:10:32,766
我想过了

1068
01:10:32,937 --> 01:10:34,928
我不想你不开心的做下去

1069
01:10:35,148 --> 01:10:36,479
你走吧

1070
01:11:02,467 --> 01:11:04,207
你好呀，鸠山小姐

1071
01:11:04,469 --> 01:11:07,802
你这两期的贷款还未还呢

1072
01:11:08,639 --> 01:11:10,470
我不知道你说什么

1073
01:11:13,895 --> 01:11:16,432
两天后不还钱

1074
01:11:16,814 --> 01:11:18,805
打断你的脚！

1075
01:11:19,150 --> 01:11:20,390
走吧

1076
01:11:20,693 --> 01:11:22,058
走吧

1077
01:11:35,249 --> 01:11:36,159
没事吧？

1078
01:11:36,334 --> 01:11:37,323
我没事呀！

1079
01:11:37,502 --> 01:11:38,867
你看我像有事吗？

1080
01:11:39,253 --> 01:11:40,618
你走啦

1081
01:11:40,880 --> 01:11:42,495
再见！

1082
01:11:45,510 --> 01:11:46,750
你他妈的又想怎样呀？

1083
01:11:46,928 --> 01:11:48,134
想和你去医院

1084
01:11:48,304 --> 01:11:50,340
然后还钱给人家，好不好？

1085
01:11:55,353 --> 01:11:57,264
小泽马利奥要复出了！

1086
01:12:04,946 --> 01:12:06,061
死了没有？

1087
01:12:06,364 --> 01:12:07,149
还未…

1088
01:12:07,323 --> 01:12:08,688
最近的医院在哪里？

1089
01:12:09,367 --> 01:12:10,197
送你去玛嘉烈医院吧

1090
01:12:10,368 --> 01:12:11,357
好呀…

1091
01:12:13,204 --> 01:12:18,699
不要喔…

1092
01:12:20,002 --> 01:12:21,663
等等

1093
01:12:23,047 --> 01:12:25,003
你身体是不是有问题呀？

1094
01:12:25,174 --> 01:12:26,505
口音好古怪

1095
01:12:26,676 --> 01:12:27,882
莫非你是同乡？

1096
01:12:29,053 --> 01:12:29,792
是

1097
01:12:29,971 --> 01:12:31,256
我是福建混大阪

1098
01:12:31,430 --> 01:12:32,636
再混俄罗斯

1099
01:12:32,807 --> 01:12:33,762
哦，就是大陆妹啦！

1100
01:12:33,933 --> 01:12:35,013
是

1101
01:12:35,476 --> 01:12:36,886
就是…

1102
01:12:37,270 --> 01:12:39,511
我吹得嘴巴也僵硬了

1103
01:12:39,730 --> 01:12:41,470
怎么它还那么软的？

1104
01:12:44,360 --> 01:12:46,601
马利奥已经不行了

1105
01:12:49,156 --> 01:12:51,112
快叫汁男随时准备

1106
01:12:51,701 --> 01:12:55,114
马利奥已经不行，大家随时准备

1107
01:12:57,582 --> 01:12:58,867
喂！大陆妹

1108
01:12:59,083 --> 01:13:00,038
你别乱说！

1109
01:13:00,209 --> 01:13:02,074
我小泽马利奥在这一行堪称出了名的…

1110
01:13:02,253 --> 01:13:03,663
口软茎硬

1111
01:13:03,921 --> 01:13:05,377
会不会是你有问题？

1112
01:13:05,590 --> 01:13:08,127
我？我有什么问题？

1113
01:13:08,885 --> 01:13:11,501
会不会是你身材有问题呀？

1114
01:13:11,721 --> 01:13:13,803
我身材有什么问题？

1115
01:13:14,473 --> 01:13:17,135
如果我身材有问题

1116
01:13:17,476 --> 01:13:19,762
我作为一个福建人

1117
01:13:19,979 --> 01:13:23,312
怎样在这个日本AV界立足？

1118
01:13:23,566 --> 01:13:24,931
说呀？你穿得像粽子一样…

1119
01:13:25,109 --> 01:13:27,851
我想你不就是胸部跟背部一样平！

1120
01:13:28,070 --> 01:13:30,527
我奶奶是俄罗斯人

1121
01:13:30,740 --> 01:13:33,823
我的身材是鬼妹的身材！

1122
01:13:33,993 --> 01:13:35,529
三岁鬼妹呀？

1123
01:13:36,621 --> 01:13:38,452
我看你…

1124
01:13:38,623 --> 01:13:42,411
也是不见身材不流眼泪的了

1125
01:13:42,835 --> 01:13:44,996
让我秀一些本钱给你看！

1126
01:13:51,135 --> 01:13:52,625
真他妈的大波！

1127
01:13:52,803 --> 01:13:54,043
怎样？

1128
01:13:54,305 --> 01:13:56,387
究竟是我的问题

1129
01:13:56,557 --> 01:13:59,299
还是你的问题呀？

1130
01:14:00,770 --> 01:14:02,806
那很明显是我有问题了

1131
01:14:03,481 --> 01:14:04,687
我对不起你

1132
01:14:04,982 --> 01:14:06,313
对不起！

1133
01:14:07,818 --> 01:14:10,230
没关系…

1134
01:14:11,322 --> 01:14:13,483
人生，总是会有…

1135
01:14:13,658 --> 01:14:16,195
高潮和低潮的

1136
01:14:16,535 --> 01:14:19,493
我之前有好几年拍AV

1137
01:14:19,705 --> 01:14:21,036
都没有高潮

1138
01:14:21,290 --> 01:14:25,249
不也是干巴巴的熬过去了

1139
01:14:25,920 --> 01:14:28,161
所以呢，不用怕

1140
01:14:28,381 --> 01:14:30,463
希望在明天嘛！

1141
01:14:31,133 --> 01:14:32,589
谢谢你！

1142
01:14:32,843 --> 01:14:33,457
加油！

1143
01:14:33,636 --> 01:14:34,625
是！

1144
01:14:35,805 --> 01:14:37,887
替身呀！开工呀！

1145
01:14:38,057 --> 01:14:39,797
这个性无能的

1146
01:14:39,976 --> 01:14:41,512
浪费我的时间！

1147
01:14:43,521 --> 01:14:44,852
真的不行呀？

1148
01:14:45,690 --> 01:14:46,554
放心

1149
01:14:46,732 --> 01:14:48,188
问题不大的

1150
01:14:48,484 --> 01:14:50,020
只是麻烦很大而已

1151
01:14:55,116 --> 01:14:57,152
今天AV头条！

1152
01:14:57,535 --> 01:14:58,775
知情人士爆料

1153
01:14:58,953 --> 01:15:02,866
小泽马利奥自被香港女朋友袭击下体之后

1154
01:15:03,374 --> 01:15:04,705
虽然生理上已经康复

1155
01:15:04,875 --> 01:15:06,831
但患上了精神不举

1156
01:15:07,086 --> 01:15:09,668
连拍AV也得用替身

1157
01:15:10,131 --> 01:15:11,621
如果传闻是真的

1158
01:15:11,882 --> 01:15:13,338
真的叫人太担心了

1159
01:15:13,551 --> 01:15:15,917
不过小泽马利奥最近也真的很麻烦

1160
01:15:16,262 --> 01:15:17,422
因为近期AV界的超新星出道

1161
01:15:17,596 --> 01:15:19,211
他就是被誉为小泽马利奥劲敌

1162
01:15:19,473 --> 01:15:25,719
治愈系AV美男-长崎直树

1163
01:15:26,355 --> 01:15:31,395
我们现在先去看看他的访问…

1164
01:15:35,740 --> 01:15:37,776
各位，你们好

1165
01:15:37,950 --> 01:15:39,440
我是长崎直树

1166
01:15:39,618 --> 01:15:41,574
能够令女性观众开心

1167
01:15:41,746 --> 01:15:44,078
是我最大的幸福呢

1168
01:15:45,082 --> 01:15:50,372
有评论说你模仿小泽马利奥

1169
01:15:50,671 --> 01:15:52,457
你怎么看？

1170
01:15:52,631 --> 01:15:53,996
小泽马利奥

1171
01:15:54,425 --> 01:15:55,505
这个…

1172
01:15:55,760 --> 01:15:57,591
既然大家都是香港人

1173
01:15:58,471 --> 01:16:00,257
你敢不敢接受挑战？

1174
01:16:00,931 --> 01:16:04,515
我们就用下一部AV的销量来决一胜负

1175
01:16:05,478 --> 01:16:06,809
如果输掉的话…

1176
01:16:07,104 --> 01:16:08,594
必须承认对方

1177
01:16:08,773 --> 01:16:10,513
就是“男优之王”！

1178
01:16:11,442 --> 01:16:12,852
你敢不敢接受？

1179
01:16:15,071 --> 01:16:18,234
长崎直树真的好有型呀！

1180
01:16:19,158 --> 01:16:20,113
厉害！

1181
01:16:20,326 --> 01:16:21,941
长崎直树真是厉害！

1182
01:16:22,161 --> 01:16:24,117
最新AV《乱奸·未亡人》销量数字

1183
01:16:24,288 --> 01:16:26,654
已经超过了马利奥！

1184
01:16:27,124 --> 01:16:27,954
我们现在就为大家送上

1185
01:16:28,125 --> 01:16:29,456
这部AV的精彩片段

1186
01:16:40,721 --> 01:16:41,927
春子…

1187
01:16:44,350 --> 01:16:45,681
就是…

1188
01:16:46,435 --> 01:16:48,096
我们曾经说过

1189
01:16:48,562 --> 01:16:50,302
永远在一起

1190
01:16:51,148 --> 01:16:52,433
但为什么你那么忍心

1191
01:16:52,608 --> 01:16:54,599
就这样丢下我？

1192
01:16:55,402 --> 01:16:56,733
没了你以后…

1193
01:16:58,072 --> 01:16:59,232
就是…

1194
01:16:59,907 --> 01:17:02,148
我根本没办法去相信爱

1195
01:17:03,619 --> 01:17:05,860
也不可以再去爱了

1196
01:17:07,748 --> 01:17:09,739
“奇摸鸡”！

1197
01:17:21,929 --> 01:17:22,884
是…

1198
01:17:23,222 --> 01:17:24,712
你们有心了

1199
01:17:28,894 --> 01:17:30,475
春子的死是一个意外

1200
01:17:30,688 --> 01:17:32,519
你不要怪责自己了

1201
01:17:34,024 --> 01:17:35,230
就是…

1202
01:17:36,152 --> 01:17:37,642
如果不是我带他去撒尿

1203
01:17:37,820 --> 01:17:38,980
只顾着抽烟

1204
01:17:39,196 --> 01:17:40,527
拉他不住…

1205
01:17:42,158 --> 01:17:44,695
他绝对不会给那货车辗死！

1206
01:17:45,327 --> 01:17:47,238
那轮胎还他妈的那么大！

1207
01:17:47,538 --> 01:17:49,904
我最喜欢就是多情的男人

1208
01:17:50,624 --> 01:17:52,660
他的眼泪已经将我溶化

1209
01:18:04,638 --> 01:18:06,048
直树…

1210
01:18:06,473 --> 01:18:08,088
你靠在我个肩膀尽情哭吧　　　不要…

1211
01:18:08,642 --> 01:18:10,678
不要…

1212
01:18:11,312 --> 01:18:12,893
不要…

1213
01:18:13,522 --> 01:18:14,978
不要…

1214
01:18:20,571 --> 01:18:21,686
不要…

1215
01:18:25,910 --> 01:18:28,697
不要…

1216
01:18:29,371 --> 01:18:30,861
站住！

1217
01:18:34,668 --> 01:18:36,124
如果你走出这个门口

1218
01:18:36,295 --> 01:18:38,251
春子就会永远消失！

1219
01:18:40,633 --> 01:18:42,089
想拿回春子

1220
01:18:42,301 --> 01:18:43,916
你自己脱衣服吧！

1221
01:18:44,220 --> 01:18:46,051
快点脱衣服！

1222
01:18:50,100 --> 01:18:51,636
快点！

1223
01:18:52,144 --> 01:18:54,100
由上至下脱光！

1224
01:18:54,271 --> 01:18:55,681
脱掉裤子！

1225
01:18:55,940 --> 01:18:57,271
脱掉内裤！

1226
01:18:57,441 --> 01:18:58,180
脱掉袜子！

1227
01:18:58,359 --> 01:18:59,769
干嘛这样子？

1228
01:18:59,944 --> 01:19:01,900
给我看你的乳头！

1229
01:19:02,112 --> 01:19:03,227
跪下！

1230
01:19:04,365 --> 01:19:05,775
要笑！

1231
01:19:06,951 --> 01:19:08,111
跳舞！

1232
01:19:23,384 --> 01:19:26,342
我宁愿给那么大的轮胎辗死的是我

1233
01:19:27,388 --> 01:19:30,972
给那三个女人淫辱的是你呀，春子

1234
01:19:35,020 --> 01:19:39,013
（我的生命，犹如狂风中的花瓣）

1235
01:19:39,191 --> 01:19:40,055
（柔弱、飘零…）

1236
01:19:40,234 --> 01:19:40,723
（长崎直树）

1237
01:19:40,901 --> 01:19:42,983
好！替我答应他！

1238
01:19:43,988 --> 01:19:44,977
他妈的不行

1239
01:19:45,155 --> 01:19:46,645
你真的他妈的不行嘛！

1240
01:19:46,991 --> 01:19:48,276
不行也得行

1241
01:19:48,993 --> 01:19:49,823
我要做一件

1242
01:19:49,994 --> 01:19:51,780
我一辈子都会记得的事

1243
01:19:52,037 --> 01:19:53,698
那你不去操门外的护卫员？

1244
01:19:57,167 --> 01:19:58,782
我突然间想起一个人

1245
01:19:59,044 --> 01:20:00,159
找到她

1246
01:20:00,337 --> 01:20:01,076
那就行了！

1247
01:20:01,255 --> 01:20:02,040
好！

1248
01:20:02,214 --> 01:20:04,000
我无论如何都帮你找她回来！

1249
01:20:05,050 --> 01:20:06,665
不会真的是门外那护卫员吧？

1250
01:20:07,511 --> 01:20:10,218
这个女人，是我青春期AV的女神

1251
01:20:10,389 --> 01:20:12,846
少年的我，为她打落了无数架飞机

1252
01:20:13,017 --> 01:20:14,302
成为空战英雄

1253
01:20:14,518 --> 01:20:17,134
她简直是我对性爱的启蒙老师

1254
01:20:17,354 --> 01:20:20,812
也是好多香港空战英雄的偶像

1255
01:20:21,567 --> 01:20:22,556
各位观众…

1256
01:20:22,735 --> 01:20:24,066
夕树舞子

1257
01:20:37,041 --> 01:20:39,202
小泽先生的情况，我明白了

1258
01:20:39,877 --> 01:20:41,913
那你需要多少时间呢？

1259
01:20:43,213 --> 01:20:45,704
给我一杯茶的时间

1260
01:20:50,554 --> 01:20:53,045
男人的性兴奋

1261
01:20:53,223 --> 01:20:54,884
是源自大脑

1262
01:20:55,476 --> 01:20:58,058
不是源自下半身

1263
01:20:58,896 --> 01:21:00,261
如果出现问题

1264
01:21:00,481 --> 01:21:02,392
最佳解决方法

1265
01:21:02,900 --> 01:21:04,185
是追本逆源

1266
01:21:04,360 --> 01:21:07,102
找回他成长期令他兴奋的目标

1267
01:21:07,446 --> 01:21:08,982
令他重新起动

1268
01:22:06,380 --> 01:22:07,916
好辛苦！

1269
01:22:11,468 --> 01:22:12,799
没事吗？

1270
01:22:13,470 --> 01:22:14,459
小泽先生

1271
01:22:14,638 --> 01:22:17,880
你要坚持，医生很快就来了

1272
01:22:18,684 --> 01:22:20,094
好辛苦！

1273
01:22:30,487 --> 01:22:31,476
怎么了？

1274
01:22:31,989 --> 01:22:33,980
小泽先生，你的心跳好奇怪

1275
01:23:01,643 --> 01:23:02,758
好辛苦！

1276
01:23:02,936 --> 01:23:04,426
没事吗？

1277
01:23:05,314 --> 01:23:06,850
发生了什么事？

1278
01:23:07,024 --> 01:23:08,059
怎么了？

1279
01:23:08,233 --> 01:23:09,439
什么？

1280
01:23:09,860 --> 01:23:11,350
你没事吗？

1281
01:23:12,112 --> 01:23:14,444
我的胸口好痛喔

1282
01:23:15,199 --> 01:23:16,985
你替我擦点油吧

1283
01:23:17,159 --> 01:23:18,023
擦点油麻烦你

1284
01:23:18,202 --> 01:23:20,363
擦在乳头上就最好了

1285
01:23:20,871 --> 01:23:24,363
对不起，如果是这样擦油也没用

1286
01:23:27,461 --> 01:23:28,576
这个

1287
01:23:29,046 --> 01:23:30,536
振作呀！

1288
01:23:30,964 --> 01:23:32,704
振作呀！

1289
01:23:33,217 --> 01:23:35,253
振作呀！

1290
01:23:35,511 --> 01:23:37,297
振作呀！

1291
01:23:41,308 --> 01:23:43,845
我虽然令他起死回生

1292
01:23:44,436 --> 01:23:46,927
但是要他变回生龙活虎，比以前还厉害

1293
01:23:47,856 --> 01:23:50,518
还是需要更加厉害的高人帮他

1294
01:23:58,367 --> 01:23:59,857
喂，你在哪儿？

1295
01:24:00,285 --> 01:24:02,571
忽然叫我来这个货仓做什么呀？

1296
01:24:02,746 --> 01:24:05,078
我觉得你在港女手上跌倒

1297
01:24:05,249 --> 01:24:07,706
就应该从港女手上站起来！

1298
01:24:08,043 --> 01:24:09,999
所以我专诚为你速递了

1299
01:24:10,212 --> 01:24:12,077
香港首屈一指的本地鸡来日本呢

1300
01:24:37,614 --> 01:24:40,356
金鸡也有外送服务到日本？

1301
01:24:40,742 --> 01:24:43,779
老板，我不就是阿金罗

1302
01:24:43,954 --> 01:24:46,036
我一直想打开国际市场

1303
01:24:46,206 --> 01:24:47,992
今天终于可以实现到了

1304
01:24:48,166 --> 01:24:50,748
谢谢你，请多多指教！

1305
01:24:51,003 --> 01:24:52,789
鸠山小姐已经全告诉我了

1306
01:24:52,963 --> 01:24:54,624
你放心吧，我绝不失手

1307
01:24:54,798 --> 01:24:58,290
香港人对我特别有亲切感的

1308
01:24:58,802 --> 01:25:00,588
我包你可以…

1309
01:25:03,140 --> 01:25:04,801
射爆大气层

1310
01:25:05,684 --> 01:25:08,050
我好开心呀，第一次出来公干！

1311
01:25:08,228 --> 01:25:10,014
我真的好开心呀！

1312
01:25:12,482 --> 01:25:14,268
是，谢谢

1313
01:25:14,651 --> 01:25:15,640
那我开始了，老板

1314
01:25:15,819 --> 01:25:16,399
好啊…

1315
01:25:16,570 --> 01:25:17,355
要不要女朋友感觉？

1316
01:25:17,529 --> 01:25:18,314
千万不要

1317
01:25:18,488 --> 01:25:20,649
我女朋友害成我这样，我好恨她

1318
01:25:20,824 --> 01:25:21,813
好

1319
01:25:26,705 --> 01:25:28,946
我一看就知他有一段伤心的往事

1320
01:25:29,124 --> 01:25:29,658
非常伤心！

1321
01:25:29,833 --> 01:25:31,414
我先跟他聊聊天

1322
01:25:44,181 --> 01:25:45,887
看来我也要用冰火了！

1323
01:25:46,141 --> 01:25:49,850
不用出动那么大杀伤力武器对付我吧？

1324
01:25:50,103 --> 01:25:51,684
非常时期用非常方法嘛

1325
01:25:51,855 --> 01:25:52,844
刘德华教的

1326
01:25:53,023 --> 01:25:55,765
那混蛋刘德华，这次给他害惨了

1327
01:26:17,631 --> 01:26:18,620
热死人了

1328
01:26:18,799 --> 01:26:21,040
怎么你那么固执，这样都不射？

1329
01:26:21,551 --> 01:26:22,131
不行了

1330
01:26:22,302 --> 01:26:25,009
我要出涡轮增压，爆旋陀螺！

1331
01:26:58,880 --> 01:27:01,462
金鸡果然名不虚传！

1332
01:27:01,633 --> 01:27:04,420
看来，你已经射出了银河系

1333
01:27:04,928 --> 01:27:06,589
依你现在的功力

1334
01:27:06,805 --> 01:27:08,591
可以接受任何挑战

1335
01:27:09,850 --> 01:27:11,010
你要记住

1336
01:27:11,184 --> 01:27:12,640
你是香港人

1337
01:27:13,019 --> 01:27:15,601
香港人的核心价值就是…

1338
01:27:16,231 --> 01:27:19,268
遇到任何挫折，都一定要…

1339
01:27:20,318 --> 01:27:21,433
硬！

1340
01:27:27,117 --> 01:27:29,529
当今两大最受迎的AV男优

1341
01:27:30,120 --> 01:27:32,702
小泽马利奥和长崎直树的…

1342
01:27:32,998 --> 01:27:36,331
“男优王者大对决”直播

1343
01:27:36,877 --> 01:27:38,037
现在正式开始！

1344
01:27:43,341 --> 01:27:44,421
小泽马利奥

1345
01:27:44,593 --> 01:27:46,629
我今天就要在全世界面前打败你！

1346
01:27:47,471 --> 01:27:48,460
如果你输了

1347
01:27:48,638 --> 01:27:49,753
你要在电视机面前

1348
01:27:49,931 --> 01:27:51,262
向所有观众下跪

1349
01:27:51,433 --> 01:27:53,924
承认我，才是真正的“男优之王”

1350
01:27:54,811 --> 01:27:57,097
你这个江门古天乐，我跟你说呀

1351
01:27:57,314 --> 01:28:00,306
你抄袭我卖点这件事我都还未跟你算帐

1352
01:28:00,484 --> 01:28:01,064
好！

1353
01:28:01,234 --> 01:28:03,520
今天我就让全日本人知道

1354
01:28:03,695 --> 01:28:06,528
谁才是最可爱的！

1355
01:28:07,240 --> 01:28:08,821
今天这场AV男优对决

1356
01:28:09,576 --> 01:28:11,191
将会以两位男优最新推出

1357
01:28:11,369 --> 01:28:13,610
在今天开卖的AV新作销量决胜负

1358
01:28:13,830 --> 01:28:17,163
而为了增加专业认受性

1359
01:28:17,334 --> 01:28:19,495
当然要请来他们的师傅

1360
01:28:19,920 --> 01:28:22,457
殿堂级AV男优

1361
01:28:22,631 --> 01:28:26,874
加藤鹰先生作专业评判

1362
01:28:31,765 --> 01:28:33,596
加藤鹰先生

1363
01:28:34,184 --> 01:28:38,348
你怎么看这次两位徒弟的对决呢？

1364
01:28:38,605 --> 01:28:41,688
他们俩都是我爱徒

1365
01:28:42,526 --> 01:28:45,233
真的左手手指又是肉

1366
01:28:45,445 --> 01:28:47,686
右手手指也是肉

1367
01:28:48,573 --> 01:28:52,612
我觉得是自己的左手和右手的决战

1368
01:28:53,453 --> 01:28:57,241
两位男优又有话要发表

1369
01:28:57,541 --> 01:28:58,656
真看不过眼你那么帅

1370
01:28:58,834 --> 01:29:00,370
好，就跟你拚了

1371
01:29:00,544 --> 01:29:03,035
如果今天谁输了，就要含我们师傅…

1372
01:29:03,213 --> 01:29:04,828
加藤鹰“神之手”

1373
01:29:05,006 --> 01:29:05,870
的手指！

1374
01:29:06,049 --> 01:29:06,663
靠！

1375
01:29:06,842 --> 01:29:07,877
你这个翻版张家辉

1376
01:29:08,051 --> 01:29:08,961
含而已，谁怕谁

1377
01:29:09,135 --> 01:29:11,126
那你就错了

1378
01:29:11,304 --> 01:29:14,171
一块砧板，就算切了三十年刺身

1379
01:29:14,349 --> 01:29:16,715
都会有点腥味吧？更何况…

1380
01:29:17,561 --> 01:29:19,392
加藤鹰的手指唷！

1381
01:29:20,939 --> 01:29:22,645
你等着含吧！

1382
01:29:23,400 --> 01:29:27,359
我手上已经有小泽和长崎的新作

1383
01:29:28,029 --> 01:29:29,144
去吧！

1384
01:30:20,206 --> 01:30:21,446
丑成这样！

1385
01:30:37,474 --> 01:30:38,884
好可爱呢！

1386
01:30:41,978 --> 01:30:44,390
先生，我们几姊妹希望…

1387
01:30:44,689 --> 01:30:47,726
吸收先生身体的精华

1388
01:30:47,901 --> 01:30:51,359
帮我们的灵魂补湿

1389
01:30:51,571 --> 01:30:53,812
让我们得以超渡

1390
01:30:54,532 --> 01:30:56,147
等等，你走光喔！

1391
01:30:56,326 --> 01:30:57,566
没关系！

1392
01:31:20,225 --> 01:31:21,214
临

1393
01:31:21,893 --> 01:31:23,178
兵

1394
01:31:23,728 --> 01:31:24,843
斗

1395
01:31:25,522 --> 01:31:26,557
者

1396
01:31:26,856 --> 01:31:27,390
皆

1397
01:31:27,565 --> 01:31:28,304
阵

1398
01:31:28,483 --> 01:31:29,188
裂

1399
01:31:29,359 --> 01:31:30,565
在

1400
01:31:32,696 --> 01:31:33,731
前

1401
01:31:41,037 --> 01:31:43,119
我们来生再见

1402
01:31:52,298 --> 01:31:55,005
真的没想到，太有惊喜了

1403
01:31:56,261 --> 01:32:00,550
长崎竟然想到以男女阴阳调和

1404
01:32:01,141 --> 01:32:04,178
破了人类和幽灵的界限

1405
01:32:04,853 --> 01:32:07,845
将AV提升到一个哲学的层次

1406
01:32:09,524 --> 01:32:10,809
谢谢！

1407
01:32:11,901 --> 01:32:13,186
谢谢！

1408
01:32:15,405 --> 01:32:17,396
我们长崎一定会赢

1409
01:32:17,782 --> 01:32:19,397
你们不如早点认输吧

1410
01:32:21,786 --> 01:32:25,244
我现在真的好担心呀，可是…

1411
01:32:26,124 --> 01:32:27,364
操你呀！

1412
01:32:28,418 --> 01:32:31,956
刚刚加藤先生的评语一出

1413
01:32:32,172 --> 01:32:33,582
长崎直树的新作

1414
01:32:33,798 --> 01:32:35,538
《超渡淫灵》的销量直线上升

1415
01:32:41,347 --> 01:32:42,507
我现在已经幻想到

1416
01:32:42,682 --> 01:32:45,845
一会儿你捉住加藤鹰双手，含着的样子

1417
01:32:46,144 --> 01:32:48,180
真的很可爱呢！

1418
01:32:48,646 --> 01:32:49,601
靠！

1419
01:32:53,443 --> 01:32:56,651
不知小泽又会以什么题材迎战

1420
01:32:56,821 --> 01:33:00,109
又可不可以胜过长崎呢？

1421
01:33:00,283 --> 01:33:01,523
加藤先生

1422
01:33:01,743 --> 01:33:04,325
我们还是快点看看小泽的新作吧！

1423
01:33:05,080 --> 01:33:05,910
去吧！

1424
01:33:12,128 --> 01:33:15,916
地球在宇宙中就好像一个无辜少女

1425
01:33:16,132 --> 01:33:18,589
经常给来自外星的怪兽蹂躏

1426
01:33:18,802 --> 01:33:20,758
通常呢，就一星期一次

1427
01:33:20,929 --> 01:33:23,636
因为超人片集就是一星期播一次的

1428
01:33:23,932 --> 01:33:25,468
这一次就最离谱了

1429
01:33:25,642 --> 01:33:27,303
因为怪兽好多

1430
01:33:27,477 --> 01:33:28,512
好多只

1431
01:34:12,689 --> 01:34:13,804
“?咩爹”！

1432
01:34:13,982 --> 01:34:15,188
“?咩爹”！

1433
01:34:21,948 --> 01:34:23,188
这个时候…

1434
01:34:23,408 --> 01:34:24,193
真他妈的没用

1435
01:34:24,367 --> 01:34:27,655
没一次够怪兽打的地球保卫队出动了！

1436
01:34:27,829 --> 01:34:30,070
这个…那些怪兽都他妈的疯了

1437
01:34:37,130 --> 01:34:38,461
看看看

1438
01:34:38,673 --> 01:34:41,710
这些白痴每次都只会激怒怪兽

1439
01:34:41,885 --> 01:34:43,625
简直是操他都嫌费事

1440
01:34:44,429 --> 01:34:45,544
刚刚收到消息

1441
01:34:45,722 --> 01:34:47,804
我们的部队都给怪兽击落了！

1442
01:34:47,974 --> 01:34:49,510
我们支持不下去了…

1443
01:34:49,684 --> 01:34:52,300
地球的和平还是要靠你了，小泽超人！

1444
01:34:52,604 --> 01:34:53,434
其实有哪一个礼拜不是这样？

1445
01:34:53,605 --> 01:34:54,685
你说来干吗？

1446
01:34:57,901 --> 01:34:58,731
你们这些王八蛋

1447
01:34:58,902 --> 01:34:59,891
他妈的来地球做什么？

1448
01:35:01,571 --> 01:35:02,811
那还用问？

1449
01:35:03,072 --> 01:35:04,027
来毁灭地球

1450
01:35:04,199 --> 01:35:05,905
他妈的不用血拚呀？

1451
01:35:07,410 --> 01:35:08,775
好，先杀你这个王八蛋！

1452
01:35:13,708 --> 01:35:15,323
来日本不血拚还干吗？

1453
01:35:15,793 --> 01:35:16,498
那么凶啊

1454
01:35:16,669 --> 01:35:18,079
让我把你的耳朵扭下来

1455
01:35:20,965 --> 01:35:22,125
怎么会是你呀？

1456
01:35:22,383 --> 01:35:24,044
我特地出镜支持你的！

1457
01:35:25,678 --> 01:35:27,418
平常为什么戴假发呀？

1458
01:35:28,264 --> 01:35:29,344
其实我是戴假发的

1459
01:35:29,515 --> 01:35:30,800
你这混蛋，骗我？

1460
01:35:31,100 --> 01:35:31,964
走呀！

1461
01:35:32,143 --> 01:35:33,178
小泽超人一出手

1462
01:35:33,353 --> 01:35:35,969
就把鸠山怪兽扔到很远…

1463
01:35:37,065 --> 01:35:40,182
你又不是地球人，为什么不让我们破坏？

1464
01:35:48,701 --> 01:35:49,941
这群怪兽一涌而上

1465
01:35:50,119 --> 01:35:51,108
人多欺负人少

1466
01:35:51,287 --> 01:35:52,402
围殴小泽超人

1467
01:35:52,580 --> 01:35:54,070
原来不是

1468
01:35:54,249 --> 01:35:56,285
是围着非礼小泽超人才对

1469
01:35:56,459 --> 01:35:57,790
这些怪兽，非常好色

1470
01:35:57,961 --> 01:35:59,792
对小泽超人上下其手

1471
01:35:59,963 --> 01:36:04,252
他们调戏小泽超人两颗乳头

1472
01:36:04,425 --> 01:36:06,290
还猴子偷桃！

1473
01:36:07,387 --> 01:36:08,797
操你妈的，全都歪掉了

1474
01:36:08,972 --> 01:36:09,836
还是那招…

1475
01:36:10,014 --> 01:36:13,973
招、招、招…

1476
01:36:15,019 --> 01:36:16,350
小泽超人，我问你…

1477
01:36:16,604 --> 01:36:19,346
到底地球有啥好，值得你去保护？

1478
01:36:19,524 --> 01:36:20,309
我他妈的怎会知道

1479
01:36:20,483 --> 01:36:22,223
我是超人，就要保护地球啦！

1480
01:36:22,694 --> 01:36:25,151
别跟他啰唆，先消灭他！

1481
01:36:25,321 --> 01:36:26,151
靠！

1482
01:36:26,322 --> 01:36:28,813
小泽超人，地球这趟给你害死了

1483
01:36:28,992 --> 01:36:29,981
你这混蛋，我真的忍你好久了

1484
01:36:30,159 --> 01:36:32,741
你整天在指指点点，你下来打呀！

1485
01:36:33,121 --> 01:36:35,407
操你妈的，整天只在上而坐着！

1486
01:36:35,665 --> 01:36:36,950
王八蛋，操你呀！

1487
01:36:37,125 --> 01:36:38,331
你说这些？

1488
01:36:38,501 --> 01:36:39,911
等等，操你是行得通的

1489
01:38:35,451 --> 01:38:38,033
原来令女人最受用的秘技

1490
01:38:38,204 --> 01:38:40,160
是男人的浪漫和细心

1491
01:38:40,456 --> 01:38:42,367
最令女人融化的G点

1492
01:38:42,542 --> 01:38:43,748
是在心里

1493
01:38:43,918 --> 01:38:45,658
而不在那某处

1494
01:38:45,920 --> 01:38:48,787
小泽超人，我真他妈的佩服你！

1495
01:39:43,102 --> 01:39:46,594
小泽的AV不只冲出了地球

1496
01:39:46,814 --> 01:39:48,679
有去到宇宙的胸襟

1497
01:39:49,275 --> 01:39:52,859
表达了人类渴望和外星人和平相处

1498
01:39:53,696 --> 01:39:57,234
甚至合体的愿望

1499
01:39:57,742 --> 01:40:02,111
比长崎的又再推上一个层次

1500
01:40:02,747 --> 01:40:05,534
人类以后不会再怕怪兽

1501
01:40:05,708 --> 01:40:08,700
真是来一只，操一只

1502
01:40:09,795 --> 01:40:11,660
小泽的AV

1503
01:40:12,381 --> 01:40:15,873
完全驱除了多年来我们对怪兽的恐惧

1504
01:40:16,552 --> 01:40:20,136
最新消息，有正式销量宣布

1505
01:40:20,306 --> 01:40:23,048
小泽的AV荣登销量第一

1506
01:40:24,727 --> 01:40:26,718
彻底击败长崎！

1507
01:40:36,739 --> 01:40:38,195
不可能的！

1508
01:40:40,159 --> 01:40:41,569
不可能的！

1509
01:40:42,203 --> 01:40:43,739
我现在正式宣布…

1510
01:40:44,580 --> 01:40:48,994
这次的AV男优王者大对决，胜出的是…

1511
01:40:49,544 --> 01:40:52,001
小泽马利奥！

1512
01:41:01,097 --> 01:41:04,430
够了，快点下来跪下吧

1513
01:41:23,786 --> 01:41:26,198
请你下跪吧！

1514
01:41:34,547 --> 01:41:36,959
跪呀！

1515
01:41:48,352 --> 01:41:51,185
含呀！

1516
01:42:24,639 --> 01:42:25,879
不是吧兄弟？

1517
01:42:26,140 --> 01:42:27,630
这样就想过关？

1518
01:42:29,310 --> 01:42:30,516
干嘛啦？

1519
01:42:30,686 --> 01:42:31,892
拍电视节目而已

1520
01:42:32,063 --> 01:42:33,178
用不着那么认真吧

1521
01:42:33,356 --> 01:42:34,721
真傻逼！

1522
01:42:35,316 --> 01:42:36,772
你这混蛋！

1523
01:42:40,696 --> 01:42:43,859
我今日所受的屈辱，将来…

1524
01:42:45,409 --> 01:42:47,525
一定要你百倍奉还

1525
01:42:52,541 --> 01:42:53,621
赢了啦！

1526
01:42:53,793 --> 01:42:54,248
当然啦

1527
01:42:54,418 --> 01:42:55,908
赢了啦！

1528
01:42:56,879 --> 01:42:57,914
很开心吧？

1529
01:42:58,631 --> 01:42:59,711
说点正经的…

1530
01:43:00,049 --> 01:43:02,040
你有没有试过看我的AV打飞机呢？

1531
01:43:02,843 --> 01:43:05,050
没有，当然没有啦！

1532
01:43:05,554 --> 01:43:06,885
答得那么害羞？

1533
01:43:07,348 --> 01:43:09,134
他妈的神经病，当然没有！

1534
01:43:10,059 --> 01:43:11,549
你是不是女人来的？

1535
01:43:20,903 --> 01:43:21,892
你好！

1536
01:43:22,113 --> 01:43:25,571
小泽马利奥！

1537
01:43:27,743 --> 01:43:29,358
别废话，一人一只呀！

1538
01:43:29,537 --> 01:43:30,322
都签名了！

1539
01:43:30,496 --> 01:43:31,326
谢谢！

1540
01:43:31,497 --> 01:43:32,532
从今天开始

1541
01:43:32,707 --> 01:43:34,698
我们这里只卖正版DVD !

1542
01:43:36,752 --> 01:43:38,959
真走运，我这里本来也关门了

1543
01:43:39,171 --> 01:43:41,002
但他真屌丝，接手了

1544
01:43:41,340 --> 01:43:42,750
屌丝是好的

1545
01:43:43,175 --> 01:43:44,381
曾经有人跟我说过

1546
01:43:44,552 --> 01:43:45,917
我们是香港人…

1547
01:43:46,095 --> 01:43:47,756
无论遇到什么挫折也好

1548
01:43:47,930 --> 01:43:49,295
一定要硬！

1549
01:43:49,473 --> 01:43:50,929
要硬！

1550
01:43:51,100 --> 01:43:52,431
只要我们够硬…

1551
01:43:52,935 --> 01:43:54,926
就没人可以动我们了！

1552
01:44:00,276 --> 01:44:04,565
哥儿哥儿哥儿哥儿哥～～

1553
01:44:07,283 --> 01:44:08,443
哥～～～

1554
01:44:08,617 --> 01:44:11,233
你现在是“现象级男优”呀

1555
01:44:12,246 --> 01:44:13,452
手真多…

1556
01:44:13,789 --> 01:44:14,744
你双手在干什么？

1557
01:44:14,915 --> 01:44:16,780
忍不住…忍不住…

1558
01:44:16,959 --> 01:44:19,666
Chotto Ma Te Yo爱心…

1559
01:44:31,182 --> 01:44:32,513
如果他射了

1560
01:44:32,725 --> 01:44:34,966
就可以圈一根橡皮筋在手上

1561
01:44:35,269 --> 01:44:37,760
现在他还没射，所以没有橡皮筋

1562
01:44:42,568 --> 01:44:46,402
你好，我是中国来的神算

1563
01:44:46,572 --> 01:44:48,563
绰号“人算不如天算”

1564
01:44:48,741 --> 01:44:51,483
真名是陈可辛，你可以叫我Peter

1565
01:44:52,036 --> 01:44:53,196
Peter老师

1566
01:44:53,454 --> 01:44:54,660
是不是很帅？

1567
01:44:54,872 --> 01:44:58,160
小泽老师，请你体罚我吧！

1568
01:45:00,669 --> 01:45:01,533
哗！

1569
01:45:02,713 --> 01:45:04,203
搞什么？!

1570
01:45:04,882 --> 01:45:05,837
发生什么事？

1571
01:45:06,008 --> 01:45:07,168
你女儿真混蛋

1572
01:45:07,343 --> 01:45:09,504
抓我的手，捏她的胸，成何体统！

1573
01:45:11,388 --> 01:45:13,925
她那么过份？有没有我这么过份呀？

1574
01:45:14,099 --> 01:45:16,340
哗！你想怎样呀？哗！

1575
01:45:25,736 --> 01:45:27,476
谢谢

1576
01:45:36,205 --> 01:45:38,821
谢谢大家！

1577
01:45:41,710 --> 01:45:43,291
谢谢

1578
01:45:43,504 --> 01:45:46,587
哗，好厚哦


