蓝光电影网 blu-raydisc.tv
我爱死你了 I love you so much.
我也爱你 I love you too.
我们买了 We'll take it.
一 二 三 One, two, three.
- 用力推 - 老爸 我喘不过气了 Push. But, dad, I'm out of breath.
都说了叫你别抽烟 Yeah, well, I told you not to smoke.
我还以为你指的是可卡因 I thought you just meant crack.
也包括香烟 No, I meant cigarettes too.
就你这个年纪 你应该只抽水烟 At your age, you should just be vaping.
- 快推 - 老妈哪去了 ? Push. Where's mum?
她还在家具店呢 She's still in the furniture store.
老爸 把床垫放这房间里 Hey, dad, let's put it in here.
不行 这是我弟弟的房间 No. That is me brother's room.
可是 他都失踪28年了 But, dad, he's been missing for 28 years.
我们需要这房间 你有9个小孩呢 We need the room. There's nine of us.
不行 得让这房间保持当年的模样 No. I'm keeping it the way he likes it.
不过当他回来之后 我得告诉他残酷的真相 Though when he comes back, I will have to break it to him
他以前崇拜的一些偶像 that some of his childhood heroes didn't love women
其实都不喜欢女人 as much as we thought they did.
而其中一人又喜欢得有点过头了 And one of them liked them a little too much.
老爸 你绝对找不到他了 Dad, you're never gonna find him.
还是放弃吧 You might as well just give up.
放弃 ? Give up?
我很清楚他就在某处 I know he's out there somewhere.
而某一天 And one day,
他会重回我们家庭的怀抱 he's gonna join our family again.
绿色地球 Green earth.
格雷夫特工 已为你同步资料 Agent graves, your feed is live.
目标是"大漩涡"的副指挥 The target is maelstrom's second in command.
他有着我们必须抢夺的信息 He has information we must extract.
擒获后拷问他 但别杀死他了 Capture and interrogate. Do not terminate.
开始拦截 九 八 Interception in nine, eight,
七 六 seven, six,
五 四 five, four,
三 二 一 three, two, one.
已找到目标 Eyes on the target.
注意别伤到目标 Easy. Eyes on the target.
请注意 东边有多名敌人 Be advised, multiple hostiles to the east.
目标正在移动 Target mobile.
目标正向北逃走 Target heading north.
计划有变 Alpha 1's now bravo 1.
- 他有机车 - 收到 He's mobile. Roger that.
快让路 闪开 Out of the way. Move, move, move.
我借用一下 谢谢 May I borrow this? Thank you.
已获取车辆 正追赶目标 Now complete on bravo 1, following bravo 1.
目标开始步行 正在追击 Alpha 1 now on foxtrot. I'm in pursuit.
南方有敌人 Hostiles to your south,
正赶往你的位置 advancing on your position.
目标已经上车 而且还有增援 立刻终止追捕 Bravo 1 is now mobile. He has backup. End pursuit now.
不了谢谢 I'd rather not.
我的枪 ! My gun!
指挥官 快回头 视频通讯信号 Commander, relay back. We are now nearing the limit
已经快到极限距离了 of live feed transmission.
你们好啊 Hello, chaps.
请求终止任务 指挥官 请回话 Permission to abort now. Commander, acknowledge.
再见 Goodbye.
系好安全带 ! Buckle up!
Lonomia毛毛虫的毒液 Lonomia caterpillar toxin's
已经进入了你的血管 贝德先生 entered your bloodstream, Mr. Beder.
你离心脏衰竭还有90秒 You have 90 seconds until heart failure.
不过我这里有解药 I do, however, have the antidote here.
告诉我你们"大漩涡"组织 Perhaps you'd like to tell me what your friends
高层的计划 at the maelstrom syndicate are planning.
60秒 Sixty seconds.
朗达·乔治 Rhonda George.
- 一场暗杀 - 朗达·乔治 ? An assassination. Rhonda George?
她是一名女演员和慈善家 She's the actress and philanthropist.
她两天后会主持一场"世界灵药"活动 She's hosting an event for worldcure in two days, sir.
给我解药 Give me the antidote.
恐怕已经晚了 It's too late, I'm afraid.
你得去参加这场活动 塞巴斯蒂安 I want you at this event, Sebastian.
明智的选择 莱福德指挥官 Very wise, commander ledford.
维尔贝克接球 鲁尼也在附近 Welbeck's touch. Rooney's there too.
传到卡里克脚上 导给了贝恩斯 Now carrick, here's baines.
无人防守 Oh, he's free.
英国要参加半决赛了 England are heading to the semis,
英国球迷们有好戏看了 ! to the delight of millions at home!
大伙们 Hey, everyone.
让我们像成年人一样庆祝吧 Let's celebrate responsibly.
噢 ! Oh!
不敢相信又发生这种事了 Can't believe it's happened again.
快拔出来 快拔出来 Get it out. Get it out.
快拔出来 Get it out. Get out.
- 他要爆炸了 ! - 快让路 婊砸们 He's gonna blow! Out the way, ladies.
- 我拿灭火器来了 - 感谢郭家 I've got the fire extinguisher. Thank the lord.
诺比在哪 诺比在哪 ? 诺比 ! Where's nobby? Where is he? Where's nobby? Nobby!
诺比 诺比 Nobby. Nobby, nobby.
你干嘛这么喘 ? Why are you so out of breath?
我从家里跑来的 I've run all the way from home.
可你家就在街对面 But you only live across the street.
你还记得我表帝格尔吗 ? Do you remember me cousin, digger?
- 那个毛贼 ? - 对 What, the thief? Yeah.
他有天晚上在一个聚会上扒窃 Well, he was nicking coats at a posh event the other night,
你绝对猜不到他看到谁了 and you'll never guess who he saw.
- 谁 ? - 我们终于找到他了 Who? We finally found him.
我们终于找到你弟弟了 We finally found your brother.
诺比·布彻 以及 塞巴斯蒂安·布彻 Nobby and Sebastian butcher.
我们是格林斯比的布彻兄弟 We're the butcher boys of grimsby.
他们永远别想拆散我们 They'll never split us up.
- 永远 ! - 永远 ! Forever! Forever!
你弟弟明天要去参加一场上流活动 Your brother is gonna be at a fancy party tomorrow.
可我怎么进去 ? But how will I get in?
我表弟给你偷了张门票 Me cousin's nicked you a ticket.
全球的领袖们 Leaders from around the world,
比如世界卫生组织的领头人 such as the head of the world health organization
哈维尔·阿尔瓦雷斯 以及包括丹尼尔·拉德克里夫在内的名人 Javier Alvarez and celebrities, including Daniel Radcliffe,
都前来参加了"世界灵药"活动 have gathered at this worldcure event,
主办人是 慈善家朗达·乔治 sponsored by philanthropist, Rhonda George.
绿色地球 Green earth.
格雷福斯特工 Agent graves,
已为你同步 your feed is live.
- 是谁在我耳朵里说话 ? - 是我 Who's this in my ear? It's me.
别调情了 这是公开频道 And stop flirting. We're on an open channel.
好吧 Right.
- 多少钱 ? - 免费的 先生 How much? Complimentary, sir.
你们好啊 How now?
嗨 Hi.
你有没有见到我弟弟 他叫塞巴斯蒂安 Have you seen me brother? He's called Sebastian.
这是他的照片 我几年前纹的 Here's a photo of him. It was taken a few years ago.
你就位了没 格雷夫特工 ? Are you in position yet, agent graves?
啊欧 Uh-oh.
别这样 卡住了 Come on. It's stuck.
快出来啊 Come on.
大家欢迎 朗达·乔治 Please welcome Rhonda George.
大家下午好 女士先生们 Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen.
谢谢大家 Thank you.
当我一开始发起"世界灵药"的时候 When I started worldcure,
很多人都经常对我说 people would constantly say to me:
"你无法治愈全世界的疾病" "You cannot rid the world of disease."
而我会直视他们的双眼 I would look them straight in the eye
并说 "我就是能" and say, "Yes, I can."
有没有发现敌人的马脚 格雷夫 ? Can you detect any imminent threat, graves?
我们将会想出办法 We are gonna figure this out.
而我们的第一步 就是这里 就是现在 And it all starts right here, right now,
从一个小孩开始 with one little boy.
他的名字叫洛莫·哈立迪 His name is schlomo khalidi.
女士先生们 我们将治愈全世界 Ladies and gentlemen, we will cure the world.
我妈妈是犹太人 Mummy was Jewish.
爸爸是巴勒斯坦人 Daddy was palestinian.
但他俩互相深爱着 But they both loved each other so very much.
我天生就有艾滋病 I was born with HIV.
现在我已经病入膏肓了 Now I am very sick with aids.
太棒了 ! Yes! Fantastic!
你就等死吧 ! You are not coming back from that!
嘘 ! Shh!
虽然这个疾病会杀死我... Though this disease may kill me...
- 袭击者... - ...为什么我们 The operator. ...Why can't we stop
在中东就不能停止互相杀戮 ? killing each other in the middle east?
袭击者在哪 ? Where's the operator?
摄影机其实是枪 The camera's a gun.
该死 摄影机其实是枪 ! Damn. The camera's a gun!
你是谁 ? Who are you?
我啊 It's me.
诺比 Nobby.
诺比 ? Nobby?
到底出了什么差错 ? What the hell just happened?
世界卫生组织的领头人中枪了 The head of the world health organization's been shot.
快找到枪手位置 ! 快找到枪手位置 ! Locate the shooter! Locate the shooter!
上面有枪手 ! There's the shooter!
虎尾小队 秘密行动 Tiger tail. Undercover.
我的子弹被人干扰了 My shot was compromised.
干掉他 ! Take him out!
长官 已经得到证实了 Sir, we have confirmation.
是格雷夫开的枪 Graves took the shot.
格雷夫 ? Graves?
嗷 ! Ow!
快住手 别打他 Cut it out. Leave him alone.
注意身后 ! Behind you!
- 我该怎么帮忙 ? - 离我远点 How can I help? You can stay away from me.
你需要我的帮助 You need me help.
混球 Fucking twat.
再见 诺比 Goodbye, nobby.
别担心 我不会离开你的 ! Don't worry. I won't leave you!
啊 ! Aah!
- 啊 ! 我的脚踝 ! - 我的酒瓶 Aah! My ankle! Me bottle.
快起身 ! Get off me!
脚踝骨折了 你得背我走 The ankle's shattered. You'll need to carry me.
来吧 趴我肩膀上去 Come on. Get over me shoulder.
- 抱歉 - 上车 Sorry. Get in.
喂 别当路 Hey! Move away from the car.
我得给你开罚单 Soon as I've printed your ticket.
快进去 Come on.
得由你开车 You'll have to drive.
快开 不是这里 ! Move. Not that one!
发生什么事了 ? What happened?
算了 直接开就是 Never mind. Just get going.
大伙 这样很危险的 ! Come on, it's dangerous!
立刻下车来 ! Get out of the car now!
别担心 这车是防弹的 Don't worry. It's bulletproof.
- 你们打不穿的 - 别 You can't hurt us. No.
这是防弹车窗 We've got bulletproof glass.
- 啊 - 快关窗 ! Aah! Roll it up!
快关窗 ! Roll it up!
还是直接开车吧 Just go. Now.
太棒了 逃跑途中还能看比赛 Oh, great. We can watch the match while escaping.
小心 ! Watch out!
啊 ! Aah!
他被判黄牌 He's gonna take the penalty.
- 吃黄牌了 - 诺比 别看足球了行么 There's a penalty. Nobby, forget the football.
- 你要淹死了 - 我等到 You're gonna drown. I'm getting out
- 他领了黄牌之后就下车 - 听我说 after he's taken penalty. Listen to me.
深呼吸 Take a breath.
而他... And he...
法克 ! Fuck!
世界卫生组织局长 Director general of the world health organization,
哈维尔·阿尔瓦雷斯博士 Dr. Javier Alvarez,
已死亡 is dead.
他被卷入了一起 He was caught in the crossfire
针对慈善家朗达·乔治 of an apparent assassination attempt
的暗杀行动中 on philanthropist Rhonda George.
当局已经派了多名警察 A huge manhunt is underway
追捕这名叛逃特工 to find a rogue secret agent
他首先开枪射杀了中东的和平象征 who first shot middle east peace symbol
洛莫·哈立迪 schlomo khalidi.
这名小孩被艾滋病感染的血液溅到了 The boy's aids-tainted blood then sprayed into the mouth
哈利·波特的扮演者 丹尼尔·拉德克利夫嘴里 of Harry Potter star Daniel Radcliffe.
线人报道称 Sources tell us that Radcliffe,
拉德克利夫的唾液 who had numerous open sores in his mouth,
已经检测出了艾滋病毒 has tested positive for HIV.
我们已经在审查他的背景了 长官 We're digging into his background now, sir.
希望能查明 "大漩涡"是怎么收买他的 Trying to work out how maelstrom could've got to him.
你希望我们怎么做 长官 ? What do you want us to do, sir?
激活奇尔科特 Activate chilcott.
我们当初开除奇尔科特是有原因的 长官 Chilcott was dismissed for good reason, sir.
激活奇尔科特 Activate chilcott.
生活真是奇特啊 Isn't life strange?
昨天我还在过正常日子 I mean, yesterday I'm having a normal day
在酒吧和朋友喝酒 屁股还被塞进了烟火 down the pub with me mates with a firework up me ass.
而今天就找到我弟弟了 And here we are now, with me brother,
又是奔跑又是游泳的 doing some running and swimming,
各种各样的有氧运动 all different types of cardio.
能问你个问题吗 ? Can I ask you a question?
你是不是凡·迪塞尔的替身演员 ? Are you a vin diesel impersonator?
还是说 你是专门瞄准染艾滋病小孩的杀手 ? Or are you a hit man who specializes in kids with aids?
啥 ? 我是一名秘密特工 我为军情六处的秘密小组工作 What? I'm a secret agent, I work for an offshoot of MI6.
那你怎么之前没告诉你哥哥我 ? How could you not tell your own brother what you do?
我刚不是才说了是"秘密"组织吗 ? Because within the title of my occupation is the word "Secret."
可如果你连家人都不能信任 那你还能信任谁 ? But if you can't trust family, who can you trust?
信任你 ? 信任你 ? 就是因为你 Trust you? Trust you? Because of you,
世界卫生组织的局长现在死了 the head of the world health organization is dead
而哈利·波特也染上了艾滋 and Harry Potter has aids.
你3秒内取得的成就 You managed to do in three seconds
伏地魔用了8部电影的时间都没做到 what Voldemort failed to do in eight movies.
别担心 艾滋是可以治愈的 Don't wet your knickers. It's treatable.
噢 海洛因 Ooh, heroin.
这玩意会上瘾的 That stuff's addictive. It's a gateway drug.
- 上什么瘾 ? - 海洛因瘾 To what? To more heroin.
这不是海洛因 这是骨骼急速修复剂 This is not heroin, this is rapid bone calcifier.
作用是修复我脚踝的受损处 It fills the fractures in my ankle,
填满碎裂的骨头 好让使用者能恢复走动 hardens the bone and muscle around it so that I can walk.
你脚踝出什么事了 ? Why, what happened to your ankle?
你压碎的 You fell on it.
你好 Hello.
不是我做的 I didn't do it.
我需要你的帮助 I need your help.
如果我帮你 我就会被逮捕 If I help you, I'll be arrested.
如果你不帮 那我很可能今晚就得死 If you don't, I could be dead by the end of the day.
好吧 听着 All right, listen.
莱福德激活了一名特工 叫奇尔什么什么的 Ledford activated someone called chil-something.
我只知道这些 That's all I know.
"奇尔科特" ? 老天啊 他真是疯了 Chilcott? Oh, Jesus, he's a psychopath.
- 这是追杀令 - 天啊 That's a kill order. Oh, god.
朱蒂 我需要你帮我做件事 Jodie, I need you to do something for me.
我需要你去找出杀害哈维尔·阿尔瓦雷斯 I need you to find out the identity of the man
的凶手 who killed Javier Alvarez.
如果我能找到他 我就能证明自己清白 If I can find him, it will clear my name.
你能做到吗 ? Can you do that?
我尽力 I'll try.
小赛 我能按这红按钮吗 ? Seb, can I press this red button?
- 啊 ! 操 - 怎么了 ? Aah! God's sake. What?
你射进我脖子里的东西是个追踪装置 ! You just implanted a tracking device in my neck!
至少这样你就不会再失踪28年了 At least I won't lose you for another 28 years.
我忘了说了 我给你准备了个礼物 I forgot to mention, I got you a present.
- 什么 ? 这两张门票 What? Two tickets for me and you
我们一起去智利看英国踢决赛 to go to Chile to see england play in the final.
你怎么知道英国能进决赛 ? How do you know if england are gonna be in the final?
他们最好进去 别枉费了我特地纹的纹身 Well, they'd better be because I just got this done.
英国 2016年 "世界冠军" England, world "Championes," 2016.
上面写的是200016 That says 200,016.
才没 是2016才对 No, it says 2016.
这年份还得过19万8000年才到 That's 198,000 years from now.
既然如此 那这两个"0"没收我钱 我赚大发了 In that case, I got two zeroes for free, so who's the idiot?
- 你干嘛呢 ? - 我得销声匿迹 What are you doing? I need to disappear.
外面有人在追捕我 There are people looking for me.
你不会再见到我了 You won't see me again.
祝你好运 诺比 Good luck, nobby.
嗯 Yeah.
好吧 你说得对 Okay. No, no, you're right.
我也该回家了 I should-- I should be heading back home anyway.
得去照顾家人 Got to see the family.
很高兴和你重逢 It's good to reconnect.
你多保重 Take care, eh?
保重 Take care.
等下 既然你是间谍 Wait. Since you're a spy,
那谁也不知道我是你哥哥 ? does that mean no one knows I'm your brother?
没错 Exactly.
这样的话 我给你准备了个完美的藏身地点 Well, then, I've got the perfect place for you to hide.
老天啊 Oh, no.
你能回来 Oh, it's so good
格林斯比真是太好了 to have you back in grimsby.
这里变化这么大 你肯定都认不出了 You probably don't recognize it since it were gentrified.
我又不是格林斯比长大的 I am not from grimsby.
嗨 Hiya.
我有个女朋友 虽然没有正式谈妥 I've got a girlfriend. It's nothing serious.
但她性感得不行 所以你最好收敛点 But she's fit as fuck, so hands to yourself.
来吧 把鞋脱了 Go on. Shoes off.
嗨 Hey.
- 我想你了 老爸 - 我也想你了 Missed you, dad. Missed you too.
我说的是"安全地点" 难道我没表达清楚 ? Was I not clear when I said I needed a secure location?
这里绝对安全 This place is totally secure.
不过我不知道她是谁 Although I don't know who she is.
开玩笑的 她是布兰妮 I'm just being hilarious. That's our Britney.
要喝茶吗 厨房还有烤肉串 You want a cup of tea? There's a kebab.
想吃什么自己拿 You can have anything you want there.
各种存货的厨房 It's a kitchen, fully stocked.
给我闭嘴 卡特曼 ! Shut your fucking mouth, cartman!
这是我小女儿 被解放的姜戈 And this is our new babby, django unchained.
嗨 老爸 Hey, dad.
他是谁 ? Who's that?
那是我大儿子 骷髅 That's me oldest son, skeletor.
- 嗨 - 嗨 ! Hiya. Hey!
这又是谁 又是你儿子 ? What's that, another son?
别开玩笑了 Don't be daft.
这是我孙子 江南Style That's our grandson, gangnam style.
你们好啊 Hiya.
嗨 老爸 Hi, dad.
这是卢克 And this here is Luke.
给他取这个名字是因为他得了白血病 We call him that because he's got leukemia.
真遗憾 I'm so sorry.
其实并没有 是我们给他剃的光头 He doesn't really. We just shave his head
好用他去领福利 so we can claim the welfare for it.
- 啥 ? - 给你说 What? You know what?
你这的秃头可是个摇钱树 You're looking at a gold mine up there.
每周可以领到65.4英镑的福利 This tragedy can turn into 65 pound 40 a week.
好了 化学课结束 All right, chemistry class is over.
该上生物课了 Time for biology.
在最大的时候 母象的子宫 At its maximum, the mother's uterus
能扩张到410立方厘米 expands to 25 cubic feet.
- 这是谁 ? - 他是谁 ? Who's this? Who's that?
- 就这个光头男 他是谁 ? - 杰森 The other bald man. Who's this? Jason.
- 他才是杰森 - 我是杰森 He's Jason. I'm Jason.
我有11个小孩 要记住全部人可不容易好吗 I've got 11 kids. Not easy to remember them all.
- 啊 ! - 他不叫塞巴斯蒂安 Aah! His name is not Sebastian,
你们只需要知道这点就够了 and that's all you need to know.
你上哪找到他的啊 老爸 ? 居然是科迪叔叔 What the fuck are you on about, dad? It's uncle coddy.
让我们抱抱 Give us a hug.
不敢相信真的是你 I can't believe it's you.
欢迎回到格林斯比 Welcome back to grimsby.
他们是你的家人 这些都是你的侄子和侄女 They're your family. Those are your nephews and nieces.
- 他们怎么知道我是谁 ? - 这几年来 How do they know who I am? I might've mentioned you
我提到过你几次 couple of times over the years.
"几次?" 给他看看你的纪念墙 老爸 "Couple of times"? I'll show him your wall, dad.
这是你小时候的照片 There's you as a kid.
- 快跑 ! - 你们这群小混球 Leg it! You little bastards.
把球还给我 ! Give me back me ball!
滚粗 Fuck off.
诺比 快把球传过来 Nobby. Pass us the ball. Come on.
- 快传球 - 他要进球了 Pass it. He's gonna score.
- 英国要赢决赛了 - 诺比 射门 ! England's gonna win the final. Nobby, shoot!
噢... Oh...
早安 警官 Morning, officer.
诺比·布彻 以及 塞巴斯蒂安·布彻 Nobby and Sebastian butcher.
我们正准备把球拿去 We were trying to return that beautiful ball
还给失主 to its rightful owner.
不是球的事 小伙子们 It's not about the ball, lads.
快看 小赛 那就是要领养我们的夫妻 Look, seb. That's the couple that's adopting us.
他们是从伦敦来的 They're from London.
你会和我一起去的 对吧 诺比 ? You're coming with me. Right, nobby?
当然 Of course.
我永远不会离开我弟弟 I'd never leave my little brother.
伤心很正常的 It's all right to be sad.
但绝对不能站在这里 But it's not all right to stand there and whinge
哭得没个人样 like a low mopey bastard.
我们是谁 ? 说出来 Who are we? Come on, say it.
我们是格林斯比的布彻兄弟 We're butcher boys of grimsby.
我没听见 大声点 I didn't hear you. Say it again.
我们是格林斯比的布彻兄弟 We're the fucking butcher boys of grimsby.
他们永远别想拆散我们 They'll never split us up.
- 永远 ! - 永远 ! Forever! Forever!
总之 你们叔叔肯定不想再看这些 Anyway, your uncle don't want to look at pictures
以前的老照片了 对吧 ? of me and him all day, do you?
- 是的 - 啥 ? No. What?
不想 No.
好吧 来吧 All right. Come on.
大家来看看我在伦敦旅游的照片 Let's take a look at me travel photos of London.
大家都来 都挤挤 都挤挤 Come on, everyone. Come on, squeeze up, squeeze up.
这是"七天酒店" 这是"如家酒店" This is the Norfolk arms. This is the dog and duck.
这是"汉庭酒店" This is the three crowns.
而这是查理十字警察局 And this is charing cross police station.
那群蠢猪 Fucking pigs.
这是我在喝冰镇酒 This is me with some free booze.
而这是我用手指插进了非洲小男孩的屁股 And this is me with me finger up an African boy's ass.
等下 倒退一下 给我看看 Wait a minute. Go back. Let me see.
他就是刺客 It's the assassin.
听着 伦敦是很好玩 但我很想你们 Listen, London were fab. But I missed you lot.
- 我们也想你了 - 我们也想你了 老爸 Missed you too. Missed you too, dad.
接吧 Answer it.
遵命 长官 Yes, sir.
你好 ? Hello?
莱福德在盯着你 对吧 ? Ledford's watching you, isn't he?
说"嗨 爸爸" Say, "Hi, daddy."
嗨 爸爸 Hi, daddy.
啊 Aww.
看看你的邮箱 Check your e-mail.
查出他是谁 Find out who that is.
你得进入全球面部识别数据库 You'll have to access the global facial recognition grid.
我怎么进 ? And how am I going to do that?
自己想 Figure it out.
- 嗨 - 不会是我的一生挚爱唐妮吧 ? Hiya. That the love of me life, dawny?
- 难道是我亲爱的诺比 ? - 我回来了 Is that my darling nobby? I'm back.
- 我想死你了 - 我也是 I missed you so much. Me too.
好了 孩子们快出去 All right, kids. Out. Now.
听妈妈的话 赶紧出去 Out. Listen to your mum. Out quick.
我有很重要的事要给爸爸说 I got something very important that I need to tell your dad.
什么事 ? What is it?
我内裤丢了 I lost me panties.
你确定不是被你屁股夹进去了 ? You sure your ass hasn't eaten them again?
不是 你个白痴 我是直接没穿 No, you daft twat. I didn't put any on.
我直接看硬了 Ooh, I'm getting stiffer than a pedophile at legoland.
快看 我完全 Oh, look. I'm exactly like
"第六感追缉令"里的莎伦·史泰龙一样 Sharon Stallone in basic instincts.
别担心 Don't worry.
不是从菊花里放出来的 That didn't come out me bum.
噢 Oh.
这个才是 That one did.
- 没问题 - 快过来 No problem. Get over here.
我知道你肯定想要了 I know you must be gagging for it.
- 好的 - 快来 诺比 All right. Come here, nobby.
- 嘿 - 怎么 ? Hey. What?
我想吃本市特色早餐 I'm hungry for a grimsby breakfast.
自己动手丰衣足食 Well, the buffet's open.
我预约一个人的位置 I'll need a table for one.
你就只能吃这么点 It's all-you-can-eat.
60分钟后见 See you in about 60 minutes.
快来吧 Get going.
- 咳 诺比 - 噢 Ahem, nobby. Oh.
这是我酒友 本·金斯利（英国男演员） That's me darts partner, um...Ben Kingsley.
诺比 你觉得我傻吗 ? Nobby, what do you take me for?
我知道他是谁 他是你弟弟 I know who that is. That's your brother.
这么多年你都跑哪去了 ? Where the fuck you been all these years?
我之前在忙 顺带一提 恭喜了 产期是什么时候 ? I've been busy. Congratulations, by the way. When are you due?
噢 我没怀孕 我只是胖而已 Oh, I'm not pregnant. I'm just fucking fat.
- 诺比 - 嗯 ? - Nobby. - What?
我的位置必须保密才行 It's imperative no one know that I'm here.
你需要一个周围没人的隔绝空间对吧 ? You need somewhere isolated where there's no one around?
- 完全没错 - 好吧 Exactly. All right.
我知道有个地方 I know just the place.
就这边 路过火车站 It's just this way, past the train station.
- 915车乘客请快上车 - 格林斯比到伦敦 - All aboard the 915, - grimsby to London.
进去吧 In you go.
你觉得新父母会让我们 Do you think our new parents will let us sleep
睡在同一间屋里吗 ? in the same room?
如果是双层床 我能睡上面吗 ? If we have bunk beds, can I have the top?
上面给你吧 小子 You can have the top, little man.
现在快去撒泡尿 免得被别人抢先了 Go and have a pee now before the other passengers do.
好的 哥哥 Okay, bruv.
- 额 塞巴斯蒂安... - 怎么了 ? And Sebastian... What is it?
没什么 Nothing.
诺比 ? Nobby?
诺比 ? 诺比 ? Nobby? Nobby?
诺比 ? 诺比 ? 你有没有见到我哥哥 ? Nobby? Nobby? Have you seen me brother, nobby?
诺比 你在哪 ? Nobby, where are you? Nobby!
不 ! 诺比 ! No! Nobby!
快回来 ! Come back!
快回来 诺比 ! Come back, nobby!
小赛 快走吧 Sebbo. Come on.
我知道 过去的美好历历在目 对吧 ? I know. It's great to be back, isn't it?
到了 就这里面 Here we go. Just in here.
你确定这个地方很安全 ? You sure this location is secure?
放松点 相信你哥哥 Relax. Trust your brother.
惊喜 ! Surprise!
快停下 小赛 ! No, no! Seb! Come on, no.
他们是我们朋友 No, they're our folk.
欢迎回家 Welcome home.
没人应该知道我在这里才对 Nobody's supposed to know I'm here.
确实没人知道啊 No one does know you're here.
可这伙人不就知道 These people know I'm here.
- 你们知道他在这里 ? - 不知道 ! - Do you know he's here? - No!
我们到了 We are here.
干得好 奇尔科特 Good work, chilcott.
你怎么找到他的 ? How did you find him?
就当是职业直觉吧 Let's just call it professional intuition.
什么味道 ? What's that smell?
是我 米尔基·皮姆斯 That's me. Milky pimms.
我在码头工作 Oh. I work our docks.
我们把"使命召唤"运往全世界 We transport COD all over the world.
引人入胜 Fascinating.
有什么事吗 ? Can I help you?
奇尔科特 让开 Chilcott. Move.
怎么了 ? What is it?
老天啊 我被围住了 Oh, god, I'm cornered.
我真不该独自前来的 I should never have come here alone.
你在格林斯比永远不孤独 老弟 You're never alone in grimsby, bruv.
伙计们 Lads. Lads.
看见外面那群蠢货了吗 ? See those blokes out there?
他们是曼彻斯特联队的球迷 Those are Manchester united supporters.
这些蠢货居然敢跑来这里嚣张 ? How dare those twats show up here?
拖住他们 我向你保证 我会一把火烧了你学校 Delay them. I promise I'll burn your school down.
不上学万岁 ! No school! Come on.
拿上桌球 ! Get the ball!
- 我们上 小子们 - 他们有枪 ! - Let's go, lads. - They've got guns!
打扰下 先生 你好像掉东西了 Excuse me, sir. I think you dropped something.
掉什么了 ? Dropped what?
这里可是格林斯比 渣渣 ! You're in grimsby now, you git!
你觉得我不敢杀你吗 ? 小混球 Do you think I'll hesitate to kill you? Little bastard.
就现在 ! Now!
桑杰夫 就现在 ! Sanjiv, now!
进鱼厂 这边 Fish factory, this way.
进鱼厂 快走 Come on, fish factory. Go there.
快进去 Quick. In there. Let's go.
啊 ! Aah!
小赛 Seb.
你干了什么好事 ? 你把他杀死了 What have you done? You've killed him.
诺比 你做什么呢 ? Nobby, what are you doing?
我让他死得体面些 I'm showing some respect for the dead.
给 伙计 There you go, mate.
- 诺比 - 什么 ? Nobby! What?
- 过来 - 怎么了 ? Get over here. What is it?
我需要你帮忙吸我肩上的伤口 I need you to suck this wound in my shoulder.
不不不 我可不舔男人的肩膀 No, no, no, I don't put my lips on another man's shoulder.
- 太基了 - 赶紧的 That's very gay. Do it now.
在格林斯比 人们只要 People have been chucked out of grimsby
敢点全素早餐 都会被赶出去 for ordering a vegetarian breakfast.
这颗子弹里含有lonomia毛毛虫的毒液 That pellet was filled with lonomia caterpillar toxin.
你不吸出来的话 我90秒内就会死 I'll be dead in 90 seconds if you don't suck it out.
好吧 好吧 Okay, okay.
用力点 Suck hard.
就这样 That's it.
别把毒液吞进去了 Don't swallow the poison.
赶紧吐出来 And now spit it out.
- 干得好 - 赞美太阳 Well done. Praise the lord.
我还以为我要失去你了 弟弟 I thought I'd lost you, brother.
- 我爱你 - 诺比 I love you so much. Nobby.
- 什么 ? - 我另一个部位也被击中了 What? I've been hit somewhere else.
哪 ? Where?
我才不吸那里 绝对不行 I'm not falling for that one. No way.
不行... 你干嘛 ? No, you don't-- what are you doing?
你干嘛脱裤子 ? No, why are you taking those off?
毒液是从左边睾丸叶进入的 The toxin's coursing through the left lobule of my teste.
经由精液和淋巴管通往我的肾脏 快吸 Up the spermatic plexus to my kidneys. Suck it.
呼 ! Whoo!
耶稣说过 As Jesus said,
"别给自己兄弟口交" "Thou shalt not suck off your own fucking brother."
快吸 要不然我60秒内就会死 Do it, or I'll be dead in 60 seconds.
我傻乎乎的找了你30年 I've been searching for you for almost 30 year.
其实上Grindr(同性恋交友网站)的话 2分钟就能找到了 I could've found you in two minutes on grindr.
选一个吧 要不吸我蛋蛋 要不看着我死 Choose. You can suck my scrotum or you can let me die.
好吧 Okay.
你想让我刻什么在你墓碑上 ? What would you like written on your gravestone?
快给我吸 ! Suck my balls!
喔 ! Whoa!
我只剩40秒了 I have less than 40 seconds.
好吧 All right.
这是为了老爸 This is for dad.
快吸 用力吸 Suck it. Suck harder.
吸出来吐掉 Suck and spit.
吸出来吐掉 吸出来吐掉 Suck and spit. Suck and spit.
毒液传播太快了 我得用上体位才行 It's traveling too fast. I need to be on top.
来这边 Over here.
啥 ? 不行 我才不玩Teabag(一种玩法) What? No. I draw the line at teabagging.
得赶紧摇出来 Must shake this out.
根本没起作用 It's not working.
科迪 Coddy.
科迪 别死啊 科迪 Coddy, don't go. Coddy.
我失去了你一次 I've lost you once.
我不能再次失去你 I refuse to lose you again.
噢 ! Oh!
好了 That's it.
- 我们做到了 - 你做到了 We did it. You did it.
我们做到... We did--
你居然射我脸 you just came on me face.
最多只是射精前的透明液体而已 It was a trickle of pre-ejaculate at most.
成熟点吧 Grow up.
我想象能有一天人们不用再活在困难当中 I envision a day when people won't have to live like this.
人们不再会被贫困压垮 A day when poverty will be eradicated.
我知道这一天是有可能实现的 And I know it's possible.
长官 我们有线索了 Sir, we've got something.
用力吸 吸出来吐掉 Suck harder. Suck and spit.
你找到什么新线索了 马巴尔 ? So, what's this new intelligence, marber?
我们查到了格雷夫的同伙 是他哥哥 We've identified the partner, sir. He's graves' brother.
- 哥哥 ? - 凯尔·阿伦·布彻尔 Brother? Kyle Alan butcher,
也被称作 诺比·布彻尔 a.K.A. Nobby butcher.
肯定是"大漩涡"的间谍吧 A maelstrom sleeper, no doubt.
只是个劳动阶级流氓而已 Just some working-class scum.
找出并杀了他们 Find them and kill them.
遵命 长官 Yes, sir.
我找到杀手了 I found the assassin.
他叫帕维尔·卢卡申科 他正前往南非途中 He's pavel lukashenko. He's on route to South Africa.
很好 Good.
还有 他们查到你哥哥了 Yeah. And they know about your brother.
没问题 我正准备甩开他 No problem. I'm about to ditch him.
听着 Listen.
如果他被抓到 他和他家人都会被杀 They'll kill him and his family too if they catch him.
你真希望害死你哥哥吗 ? Do you really want your brother to die?
快忘掉 Forget it.
听着 我得找你那朋友聊聊 Look, I need to talk to your friend.
叫啥来这 米尔基 ? Uh, what--? Milky?
那个运鱼的 ? The fish travel agent?
怎么 你想让他也给你吸吸 ? What, so you can gob-rape him too?
你个禽兽 You monster.
不是 No.
我们要去南非了 We're going to South Africa.
真的 ? Really?
我要和我弟弟去度假了 I'm going on holiday with me babby brother.
全球瞩目的半决赛正在上演 It's a semifinal that has become gripped by tension.
球权在英国脚上 正进行最后一次进攻 And england to have the ball. Time for one last attack, baby.
- 加油 斯特林 - 球传到了斯特林脚上 Come on, Sterling. The ball's broken for Sterling.
- 射门啊 - 拉西姆·斯特林穿过去了 Get in there. Raheem Sterling's through.
拉西姆·斯特林为英国射门得分 ! And raheem Sterling scores for england!
这一球奠定了英国 That surely puts england
前往智利参加决赛的资格 into the final in Chile.
加油 ! Here we go!
一口老痰吐你们脸上 ! We spit on your face!
加油 ! 加油 ! Here we go! Here we go!
诺比 他们在打齐克·斯丹顿 Nobby. They're beating up Zeke Stanton.
纳粹混蛋 ! Nazi bastard!
- 入侵足球场 ! - 入侵足球场 ! Pitch invasion! Pitch invasion!
- 纳粹混球 ! - 干死他们 ! - Nazi scum! - Let's get them!
- 快走 - 耶 ! - Come on. - Yeah!
比赛结束 英国将前往智利参加决赛 That's it. England are going to the final in Chile.
- 朱蒂 - 嗨 爸爸 Jodie. Hi, daddy.
别再这样叫了 感觉挺变态的 No, no, stop doing that now. It's weird.
我发现卢卡申科的位置了 I've discovered where lukashenko is.
我追踪到了他的位置 克鲁格公园的灌木旅社 I tracked him to the tshukaru bush lodge in kruger park.
他在跟一个叫约里斯·斯密特的化学家会面 He's meeting up with a biochemist called joris smit.
"大漩涡"很显然在买他的什么产品 Maelstrom are clearly buying something from him.
这人目前和他妻子 丽娜·斯密特 一起住在酒店里 He's currently in a hotel room with Lina smit, his wife,
他妻子以乱交闻名 famed for her promiscuity.
你得从她那下手 可能得献身勾引她才行 You need to find out from her. You may need to seduce her.
你也知道 为了英国 我在所不辞 Well, as you know, I'll do anything for england.
给我在旅社预定一个房间 Book me a room at the lodge.
已经定好了 你的化名叫谢尔顿先生 I have done. Your alias is Mr. Shelton.
- 嘿 英国佬 - 干嘛 ? Hey, English. What?
我有用来庆祝的好东西 I have something for you to celebrate:
全非洲最棒的海洛因 好好享受吧 The best heroin in Africa. Enjoy.
说出来很丢脸 我从没试过海洛因 I'm embarrassed to say I've never actually tried any before.
- 你绝对喜欢的 - 听着 You'll like it. Listen,
我很希望能和你保持联系 I'd love to stay in touch.
- 你有E-mail之类的吗 ? - Linkedin(商务社交网站) Are you on e-mail or...? Linkedin.
账号是 tabansinyaguraheroindealer15 It is tabansinyaguraheroindealer15.
什么 Yes.
你刚和谁说话呢 ? Who's that you were talking to?
我新朋友 塔班西 That is me new mate, tabansi.
他在南非搞运输 He flies to and from south America
在菊花里藏毒品乘飞机 with drugs rammed up his bottom.
不这么做就只能犯一辈子罪 It's either that or a life of crime.
诺比 Nobby.
我得出去几小时 I'll be gone for a couple of hours.
为啥 ? 你去做什么 ? Why? What are you up to?
我要去见个人 查清卢卡申科来这里的目的 I'm meeting someone to find out why lukashenko came here.
你就好好待在这里 懂没 ? You stay here, understood?
不 Oh, no.
我好像把我俩的针管搞混了 I think I might've mixed up our needles.
老天啊 Oh, my god.
你注射了海洛因可执行不了秘密任务 You can't do a secret mission on heroin.
别担心 Not to worry, all right?
把间谍任务交给你哥哥就行 Just leave the spying to your brother.
塞巴斯蒂安 ? Sebastian?
不是 他在沙发上躺着 No, he's currently on couch,
揉自己奶玩呢 smacked off his tits.
你是谁 ? Who is this?
我是他哥哥 诺比 I'm his brother, nobby.
我能帮什么忙吗 ? Can I help?
诺比 你得好好听着 Nobby, I need you to listen to me.
你得代替他执行任务 You are going to have to take his place.
你得前往梅特兰车站 You need to head to maitland station.
然后你会见到一个来自灌木旅社的司机 There, you'll meet a driver from tshukaru bush lodge.
见到他之后 你的化名叫谢尔顿先生 When you meet him, your alias is Mr. Shelton.
听懂了没 ? Did you get that?
我现在就传信息到你隐形眼镜上 I'll send the information to your lens.
糟了 快把门打开 ! Oh, no. Open the door!
把门打开 ! Open the door!
好的 你得进酒店去 找到丽娜·斯密特 然后勾引她 Okay, you need to head inside, find Lina smit and seduce her.
什么 背着唐妮偷情 ? 绝对不行 What, and cheat on dawny? Never.
你得勾引她 然后查出 You need to seduce her in order to find out
她丈夫卖了什么给卢卡申科 what lukashenko bought from her husband.
好吧 Okay.
你见到丽娜·斯密特没 ? Can you see Lina smit?
她很显眼的 She's easy to spot.
她穿着一条绿裙子 而且她是个大美人 She's wearing a green dress, and she's absolutely gorgeous.
噢 不 Oh, no.
她的确是个大美人 She is gorgeous.
找到了 ? Got her?
没错 Bingo.
我得挂了 记住 表现得深沉点 I've got to go. Remember, act sophisticated.
你好啊 小野猫 Hello, pussycat.
我叫... The name is...
谢尔顿 Shelton.
M.R 谢尔顿 M.R. Shelton.
我在到处找你 I've been looking for you.
你想让我清扫房间 ? You want room clean?
清扫房间 ? Room clean?
嗯 没错 "清扫房间" Yeah. Yes. "Room clean."
从上到下都清理干净 From top to bottom.
我住在23号 I'm in 23.
但是你和我一起的话 我们能玩到69号 But together, we could make it 69.
好吧 我一会就来 Okay. I come soon.
快啊 Come on.
啊 ! Ugh!
下午好 Good afternoon.
你好 我这里有紧急情况 褐色代码 Hello. There's an emergency. It's a code brown.
褐色代码 ? A code brown, sir?
我把厕所堵了 I've blocked the toiletry.
你能尽快派个人上来么 谢谢 Could you send somebody up as soon as you can, please?
好的 谢尔顿先生 Okay, Mr. Shelton.
我马上派人来 I will send you assistance.
塞巴斯蒂安到了 Sebastian graves is here.
去他的房间勾引他 Go to his room and seduce him.
我马上来 I'll be there soon.
太好了 维修工来了 Oh, good. Maintenance is here.
谢尔顿先生 Mr. Shelton.
你们这的员工真够快的 That is really fast service.
我才刚挂电话呢 I only just called down.
谢谢你这么快就来了 Thank you for coming so quickly.
希望我能满足你 I hope I can reciprocate.
好吧 Yeah.
总之 跟我来吧 Anyway, uh, follow me.
就这里面 开始工作吧 Uh, ahem, come on. In here. Let's do this.
你平时可不会选这里 Not your usual place to do it.
什么 ? 为啥 ? What? Why?
我平时会选哪 ? Where did you expect me to do it?
床上 In the bed.
床上 ? 我又不是动物 In the-- in the bed? I'm not an animal.
我都有5周没在床上拉过了 I haven't done one in a bed for over five weeks.
我们赶紧开工好吗 我直接指给你看吧 ? Let's be quick with this. Shall I show it to you?
我怎么知道 你给我看之后 How do I know that when I see it,
我不会疯狂的爱上你 ? I won't fall madly in love with you?
这可能性并不高 There's really not much danger of that.
很大坨的 It's enormous.
我喜欢那样的 All the better.
有多硬 ? How hard is it?
好吧 Well, okay.
让我想想 额... Let me try and remember. Um...
顶上十分硬 I mean, the top of it is, you know, very hard.
而且弄得我很痛 Actually, painfully so.
嗯 Mmm.
然后中间是半硬 Then kind of medium soft.
然后到了最后 又变得非常硬 And at the base of it, really hard again.
要不要我给你说说我准备怎么做 ? Now, should I tell you what I'm gonna do with it?
不了 No.
我会用手拿起来 I'm gonna take it in my hand.
- 全部拿起来 - 好吧 All of it. Right.
真是不寻常 That's very unusual.
是的 Yeah.
然后我拿嘴去亲 And then I'm gonna kiss it.
拿嘴去亲 ? Gonna kiss it?
然后就全放进嘴里去 And I'm gonna put all of it in my mouth.
简直比"两女一杯"还恶心(好孩子别去搜) This is worse than 2 girls and 1 cup.
我打赌肯定是草莓味的 I bet it tastes like strawberries.
我向你保证 绝对是清真烤肉串的味道 And I bet you that it tastes of kebab with extra curry sauce.
听着 你这人真够重口的 Listen. You're a total fucking weirdo, right?
呆在这里 绝对别出来 Just stay in here and do not come out.
好的 Okay.
又见面了 So we meet again.
请进吧 Please, come in.
好吧 Okay.
你干嘛呢 ? 叫个佣人擦桌子就行了 What are you doing? Let someone else do that.
请原谅我离开一下 Please excuse me for one moment.
你干嘛呢 ? What the hell are you doing?
我在给自己做准备 I'm getting myself ready.
嘘 ! 听着 我懂的 Shh! Listen, I get it.
你不想把褐色染料弄到衣服上去 You don't wanna get any brown shrapnel on your clothes.
褐色染料 ? Brown-- brown shrapnel?
就这个 This.
看到没 ? 硬 软 硬 You see? Hard, soft, hard.
祝你成功 May the best man win.
- 我要去修厕所了 - 别别别 - I go in there now. - No, no, no.
我们认识一下吧 Let's get acquainted.
有没有人告诉过你 Has anyone ever told you
你是个非常美丽的女人 ? that you're a very beautiful woman?
你是上帝在这"绿色地球"上 You are the most beautiful thing
创造出的最美的人 to ever walk the lord's green earth.
我们收到了格雷夫眼镜里传来的信号 长官 We're getting signal from graves' lens, sir.
放到屏幕上 Put it up.
是什么情况 ? So, what are we looking at?
老天啊 格雷夫 Good god, graves.
乌 ! Whoo!
卢卡申科为什么和你丈夫会面 ? Why did lukashenko meet your husband?
能放大那个招牌么 ? Can you zoom in on that stationery?
把坐标发给奇尔科特 Send the coordinates to chilcott.
你宁愿上女佣 也不上我 ? You'd rather make love to a maid than me?
女佣 ? Maid?
巴努 出去 ! Banu, out!
对不起 斯密特夫人 Sorry, Mrs. Smit.
斯密特夫人 ? Mrs. Smit?
出去 巴努 ! Get out, banu!
真对不起 I'm so sorry. Sorry.
现在 让我给你看看 我有多狂野 Now, let me show you how wild this animal can be.
你真以为我会让你睡我老婆吗 格雷夫先生 ? Did you really think I'd let you sleep with my wife, Mr. Graves?
没 不过话又说回来 我也没想到 No. But then again, I never thought
她会用衣架给我通大便 that she'd chop up me poo with a coat hanger.
再见了 塞巴斯蒂安·格雷夫 Goodbye, Sebastian graves.
他可不是我 That's not Sebastian graves.
- 你没事吧 ? - 嗯 You okay? Yeah.
海洛因效果如何 ? How was the heroin?
比想象中还爽 Better than expected.
卢卡申科找你丈夫做什么 ? Why did lukashenko meet your husband?
"大漩涡"在计划什么 ? What are maelstrom planning?
我不知道 I don't know.
小赛 别 Seb, don't.
别太往心里去了 美人 他见人就杀的 Don't take it personal, love. He kills everyone.
因为他小时候常尿床 It's because he used to wet the bed.
- 这事很重要 得告诉她才行 - 根本不重要 It's important she knows. It's not important.
对于那个常年睡在你下铺的小男孩很重要 Well, it was important to the boy on the bunk under you
我经常被上铺的尿滴到身上 who used to get dripped on at night.
赶紧办正事 Get on with it.
把你知道的事告诉我们 Just tell us what you know,
他就让你活命 and he'll let you live.
说吧 Come on.
卢卡申科从我丈夫那买了某种病毒 Lukashenko bought some kind of virus.
准备什么时候使用 ? When is he gonna use it?
明天 Tomorrow.
他们准备在哪释放病毒 ? Where are they gonna release the virus?
他们... They'll--
趴下 ! get down!
趴下 ! Stay down!
是奇尔科特 快跑 It's chilcott. Move!
快来 ! Come on!
快跑 Come on. Run.
根本无处可躲 There's nowhere to hide.
- 我有主意了 - 真不错 I got an idea. Oh, great.
到目前为止 你的主意 Because your ideas have netted nothing
全都是帮倒忙 but gold up to this point.
你得跟着我 You're gonna follow me
然后服从你老哥的命令 and do exactly what your big brother says.
- 赶紧的 ! - 走吧 Hurry! Come on.
他们去哪了 ? Where'd they go?
- 刚刚还在这的 - 散开 They were just here. Spread out.
找出他们 Find them.
老天啊 恶心死了 Oh, god, this is disgusting.
长官 快来看看 Sir, take a look at this!
- 看看他们走没 - 等我爬出去 - Check if they've gone. - I'm trying to.
看到什么了 ? 他们走没 ? What can you see? They've gone?
周边已安全 The coast is clear.
太好了 我们出去吧 Good. Let's get out of here.
不 Oh, no.
我操啊 ! Oh, fuck me!
做好准备 小赛 ! Brace yourself, seb!
快放开他 ! Get off him!
快抬开 啊 ! Get it off me. Aah!
公象性交能长达3小时 The male can fuck for up to three hours.
我们得给它撸出来 We have to make it come.
我在动物世界里看过 I saw it on the BBC.
你负责丁丁 我负责蛋蛋 You work the shaft, and I'll cradle the balls.
我脖子都要被顶断了 It's gonna break my neck.
我抓到了 I got them.
加油 小赛 你能行的 Come on, sebbo. You can do it.
我已经在撸了 ！ I'm doing it! I'm doing it!
- 用舌头舔它尿孔 - 别说蠢话 Put your tongue in the peehole. Don't be stupid.
好像起作用了 好像起作用了 I think we're in business. I think we're in business.
快射啊 Come on. Come on.
老天啊 Oh, god.
恶心死了 ! That is revolting!
哈库娜玛塔塔 Hakuna matata.
干得好 Well done.
我要吐了 I think I'm gonna be sick.
这最多只是射精前的透明液体而已 It's a trickle of pre-ejaculate at most.
成熟点吧 Grow up.
去看看周边安全没 See if the coast is clear.
- 不 - 怎么了 ? Oh, no. What? What is it?
这是大象群交 It's an elephant bukkake party.
快拔出去 Get it out.
我菊花要被顶破了 It's breaking me asshole.
要不了多久了 Not much longer now.
- 做好准备 ! 啊 ! - 不 ! Brace yourself! Aah! No!
好了 All right.
你还好吧 ? Are you okay?
我一点都不好 No, I'm not okay.
我刚拉的屎都是白色的 I just did an entirely white poo.
你得清洗干净 进来吧 You need to get cleaned up. Get in.
我菊花没事吧 ? Is me ass okay?
啊 ? Huh?
嗯 没什么事 一点都没事 Yeah, it's good. It's really good.
这是你蛋蛋 ? Are those your bollocks?
你右边蛋蛋被人亲出吻痕了 Someone's given you a hickey on your right nut.
是你弄的 That was you.
噢 Oh.
是朱蒂 It's Jodie.
把她娶了吧 She could be your missus.
不行 我受不了只有一个女人 No, I could never be with one woman.
那你就错过了生命中最棒的礼物 Well, you're missing out on the greatest gift in life:
家人 Family.
我家人给我的唯一礼物就是背叛 The only gift I ever got from my family was betrayal.
你当初为什么下车了 ? Why did you do it?
已经不重要了 It doesn't matter.
不重要 ? It doesn't matter?
我才6岁 你却把我抛弃了 You abandoned me when I was 6.
告诉我原因 Now, why?
我们已经做出决定了 We have made our decision.
我们决定领养其中一个孩子 罗斯利先生 We've decided we can take one of the brothers, Mr. Lowsley.
可格雷夫先生 格雷夫女士 他俩形影不离 But Mr. And Mrs. Graves, these boys are inseparable.
这样会伤碎他们心的 而且会有有非常不好的影响 It would break their hearts, and affect them both very badly.
我们已经做出决定了 This is the decision we have come to.
但这样的话 其中一人就只能 But that would leave one of the brothers
待在格林斯比的收养所了 in the foster system in grimsby.
那可不是小孩该待的地方 It's no place for a boy.
他在那里绝对没有未来 He'll have no future here.
快上车了 ! All aboard!
诺比 ! nobby!
有没有见到我哥哥诺比 ? Have you seen me brother nobby?
诺比 ! Nobby!
不 ! 诺比 ! No! Nobby!
快回来 诺比 ! Come back, nobby!
老天啊 Oh, my god.
所以当初我有可能会像你一样 ? So I could have had your life?
没错 That's right.
而我主动退出了 And you could have had mine.
诺比... Nobby...
我... I...
真对不起 I am so sorry.
等下 Wait.
我俩的丁丁好像撞上了 I think our penises just fist-bumped.
快分开 Disengage.
- 你得集中精力 对吧 ? - 对 You need to focus, right? Yeah.
你得查清楚"大漩涡"明天 You need to find out where maelstrom
准备在哪引爆炸弹 are planning to blow up tomorrow.
而我得找间酒馆看决赛 And I need to find a pub to watch the final in.
- 等下 没错 - 他们要炸掉太阳 Hold on. That's it. They're gonna blow up the sun.
不对 他们准备炸掉智利的决赛 No, they're planning to bomb the final in Chile.
- 啥 ? - 我们得怎么在 What? How are we supposed to get
12小时内飞大半个地球啊 ? halfway around the world in 12 hours
而且全球的情报机构都在追杀我 with the entire global intelligence community
我们绝对没机会的 trying to kill me? We'll never make it.
我找了你28年 I searched for you for 28 years.
我可不相信"绝对" I do not believe in never.
这就是Linkedin的魅力 That's the beauty of linkedin.
嘿 伙计 Hey, nobb-man.
就你哥哥这"卑鄙的我"的打扮 How is your brother going to blend in
是准备怎么混入 with those football hooligans
足球流氓团体里啊 ? looking like the guy from despicable me?
英国 ! England!
英国和德国粉丝们 English and German fans
过去几天来 都已经聚集到了 have been arriving here in Santiago
圣地亚哥(智利首都) throughout the last few days.
这里是一个特别适合 Looks like the perfect place
前来观看自己国家队比赛的地方 to come and watch your national team play
而且奖金已经打破了全世界足球 for what is ultimately the greatest prize
最高纪录 in world football.
不愧是世界级运动 This is a truly international occasion.
我们看到了唐纳德·特朗普(逗比美国总统竞选人) We've seen Donald trump.
荧幕巨星 丹尼尔·拉德克利夫也来了 Star of stage and screen, Daniel Radcliffe is here.
中东和平象征 洛莫·哈立迪也来了 Middle east peace symbol schlomo khalidi,
他看上去气色好多了 looking much better, is here too.
人们大喊着挥舞着国旗 So much color and noise.
而且比赛结束后还有更精彩的一幕 And there will be plenty of both at the end of the match,
最终的哨响将会点燃 because the final whistle will trigger
据说是运动史上最华丽的 what we are told will be the biggest firework display
烟火表演 ever seen at a sporting event.
我们还小的时候 When we was kids,
你有没有想过我们居然能一起来看世界杯决赛 ? did you ever think that we'd end up going to the final together?
我确实想过 哥哥 Yes, I did, brother.
诺比 ! Nobby!
- 不 - 惊喜 ! No. Surprise!
噢 ! Oh!
我想死你了 I missed you so much.
嘿 我们最喜欢的间谍 ! Hey. Our favorite spy!
他是军情六处的王牌 ! He's MI6's finest!
安静点 Keep quiet.
这里没什么好看的 ! Nothing to see!
街上有骚动 长官 There's a commotion, sir.
靠近点 Get in closer.
格雷夫 Graves.
- 诺比 - 喂 我马上回来 科迪 ! Nobby. Hey. I'll be back. Coddy!
等等 诺比 ! Wait. Nobby!
我们走 Let's go.
小赛 ? 小赛 ? Sebbo? Sebbo?
小赛 ! Sebbo!
喂 ! Oi!
小赛 ! Seb!
找到了 Got you.
这是什么地方啊 ? What is this place?
老天啊 Oh, my god.
"大漩涡"居然是卖淫集团 Maelstrom are sex traffickers.
听我说 你们快跑 Listen to me. You've gotta get out
要不然他们会把你们拿去拍卖掉 before they sell you to the highest bidder.
快跑 快跑啊 Get out. Get out now. Out.
快跑 安静点 你们不必过这种生活 Out. Shh! Quiet. You don't have to live like this.
快跑 快跑 Get out. Out. Get out.
重新拾起你们的自尊 Regain your dignity. Out.
小赛 Seb.
"强奸犯"(连读是理疗师) "The rapist."
喂 Hey.
没人能爆我弟弟菊花 Nobody buggers me brother.
男人的精液承受量是有限的 A man can only take so much jizz.
离他远点 ! Get off him!
啊 ! Aah!
等下 Wait.
你不是小赛 You're not seb.
你肯定冷死了 You must be freezing.
是你 You.
很高兴见到你 塞巴斯蒂安 Pleasure to meet you, Sebastian.
我能理解你为什么想杀 I could understand why you might want to kill
世界卫生组织的局长 the head of the world health organization.
但为什么要炸世界杯 ? Why bomb the final?
炸 ? Bomb?
根本没炸弹 There is no bomb.
是传播疾病 It's a disease.
一种名字叫RD-9的病毒 It's a virus called rd-9.
我比较喜欢称其为 "世界灵药" Or as I like to call it, worldcure.
比赛结束后 At the end of the game,
球场里的所有人都会被感染 everyone in the stadium will be infected.
病毒的潜伏期大概在 It should take two to three weeks
两到三周才会开始出现症状 for symptoms to start showing up.
到时候96000名足球粉 By which time, 96,000 fans
都已经散布到世界各地了 from almost every country in the world
都回到了自己家乡 开始传播病毒了 will be back home, spreading the disease.
你为什么做这种事 ? Why are you doing this?
想想看 Well, think about it.
我们现在人口有70亿 We have 7 billion people running around
而地球只能承受50亿 on a planet that can only hold 5.
我只是想改善下世界 I'm just trying to make the world
仅此而已 a better place, that's all.
把多余的东西删除掉 By deleting the surplus.
"治愈世界" "Cure the world."
那你准备删除哪些人 ? And whom, exactly, do you intend to delete?
垃圾们 The garbage.
那些酗酒的低能者 The imbeciles who lie around drunk,
像兔子一样到处繁殖 reproducing like rabbits.
衣来伸手饭来张口 And sitting there with their hand out,
靠着我们这些人养活他们 expecting the rest of us to pay.
直说吧 反正也不会有人会想念他们 And let's be frank, who's gonna miss them anyway?
杀了他 Kill him.
你是新入行的吧 You're new to this.
以前杀过人吗 ? You ever killed a man before?
你要拿枪射我么 ? Are you gonna shoot me?
不 No.
你们英国足球粉那句话是怎么说的来着 ? How is it you English football supporters say?
没错 Oh, yes.
准备受死吧 You're going to get your bloody head kicked in.
嗷 ! Ow!
你还是直接拿枪射我好了 Maybe just shoot me.
起来 Get up.
给你那瞎眼 Time to say goodbye to your
包猪婆说再见吧 hideous pig wife.
给你点建议 Let me give you some advice,
乌克兰版的本·阿弗莱克 Ukrainian Ben affleck.
千万不要黑格林斯比的姑娘 Never, ever slag off a grimsby lass.
你没这个胆 You don't have guts.
喔 Whoa.
没想到这么轻松 Well, that were easy.
嗨呀 Hiya.
太棒了 Amazing.
得给孩子们弄把回去 Gotta get one of these for the kids.
你有家人吗 ? You have a family?
我最近才和我家人重逢 I just reconnected with mine.
我现在准备回家 然后... I'm going to go home and--
你们这杀手行业真是不错 this killing business is a right laugh, isn't it?
我明白你们为什么这么爱枪了 I understand why you love guns so much.
用枪杀人的话 I mean, it completely detaches you
完全没有罪恶感 from the guilt of your actions.
嗒哒 ! Ta-da!
还能耍帅 Bonus point.
能别射了么 ? Will you stop shooting everything?
现在德国1分 英国1分 It's Germany 1, england 1,
情况随时可能改变 and it's anyone's final now.
- 赶紧调出图像 - 在努力了 Get that feed up. Come on. I'm trying.
没多少时间剩下了 So little time remaining.
离比赛结束还有4分钟 Four minutes to decide the final.
任务完成 Mission accomplished.
现在只要英格兰的一分 All we need is england to score.
我的人生就无悔了 This'll be the best day of my life.
啥 ? 这里的所有人都要死了 What? Every man, woman and child in this stadium is about to die.
放进耳朵里 Put this in your ear.
朱蒂 你得帮我查查任何 Jodie, I need you to check for anywhere
可能放置病毒的地方 that might contain the virus.
好的 我扫描下球场的化学物质 Okay, I will scan for the chemical signature.
我们没机会了 This is hopeless.
还有的 No, it's not.
看看是谁来了 Look who just sat down.
我们得赶在她释放病毒前阻止她 We need to stop her before she sets off the virus.
好吧 那我们从球场绕过去 All right, listen, let's go around the stadium.
时间不够的 We can't go around. There's not enough time.
我们得穿过赛场 We need to go across the pitch.
侵略赛场 Pitch invasion.
保全太多了 Too much security.
我们自己过不去的 We'll never make it alone.
自己 ? Alone?
我们并不孤单 We are not alone.
英国队目前 It's england who are looking
的进球几率比较高 the more likely to steal a late winner.
扩音器给我 Hey, give me that.
诺比 快坐下 ! Nobby! Sit down! Come on.
格林斯比的大伙们 听好了 Men and women of grimsby, listen up.
这事很重要 This is important.
看到那个姑娘没 ? You see that lass over there?
谁 ? 莎伦·奥斯本 ? What? Sharon Osbourne?
她准备释放一种致命病毒 No. She's gonna release this deadly virus,
这种病毒会杀光我们这样的穷人 and it's gonna kill poor people like us,
她觉得我们就是渣滓 because she thinks that we are scum.
没错啊 诺比 我们就是渣滓 Bloody hell, nobby, we are scum.
你的确是 皮特 Well-- well, you are, Pete.
你是被记录在案的性犯罪者 You're a registered sex offender.
我又不是在夸奖你 That's not a compliment.
我们就这样承认自己是渣滓 ? So we're scum, are we?
好吧 我给你们说说 Well, let me tell you something about scum:
建造医院的就是渣滓们 It's scum who built the hospitals
而现在却正被一家家关闭 that are now closing down.
没错 Yeah.
而发起战争的是那群混蛋 It's scum who die in the wars
捐躯的确是我们渣滓 started by the bastards in charge.
- 没错 ! - 都是因为我们渣滓 Yeah! It's scum that keep
才能让"速度与激情系列"重新开拍 the fast and furious franchise alive.
没错 ! Yeah!
我现在请求你们 加入我们 So I ask you to join with us now
- 帮我们穿过赛场... - 耶 ! and storm that pitch... Yeah!
...让世界见识下 渣滓们绝不会轻易投降 ...and show the world that scum cannot be washed away, ever.
耶 ! Yeah!
我们是渣滓 ! We are the scum!
耶 ! Yeah!
我们过早进场了 We started too early.
呼 ! Whoo!
是格雷夫 It's graves.
别让他靠近我 Keep him away from me.
目标正在移动 我同步到你眼镜上去 Okay, the target is on the move. I'll sync with your lens.
诺比 准备好大战没 ? Nobby, you ready for a fight?
我都等不及了 I thought you'd never ask.
绿色地球 Green earth.
目标正向南移动 Target heading southwest
正穿过德国球迷区域 through the German section.
快走 Come on.
看来球场秩序已经恢复 球员也回到了场上 Well, sanity has returned, and so have the players.
比赛继续 决赛重新开始 The show will go on. The final will be restarted.
朱蒂 病毒在哪 ? Jodie, where's the virus?
我还是没找到 I still can't find it.
诺比 来认识下 Nobby, meet the head
世界最大犯罪集团的老大 of the biggest crime syndicate in the world.
啥 她是FIFA老板 ? What, she runs fifa?
这蠢货又是谁 ? Who's this idiot?
他叫塞巴斯蒂安 His name's Sebastian.
小的们 ! Boys!
该死 Oh, bollocks.
上 ! Go!
快追 她要逃掉了 ! Quick! She's getting away!
又见面了 So we meet again.
找到了 I found it.
病毒在其中一个烟火里 The virus is in one of the fireworks.
赶在她释放病毒前射她 Shoot her before she gets to the detonator.
如果我射偏怎么办 ? But what if I miss?
我相信你 I trust you.
喂 ! Oi!
10秒 Ten seconds.
就只剩这点时间了 快看斯特林 ! That's all that's left. Oh, look at Sterling!
好机会 ! What a chance!
不 球要越过球门了 ! Oh, no! It's going over the bar!
噢 并没有 Oh, no, it's not.
等下 球是怎么搞的 ! But wait! What's happened to the ball?
弹进球门了 ! It's bounced in!
不 裁判要判此球无效 No, the referee's gonna disallow it.
- 进球有效 - Yes ! The goal stands. Yes!
英国赢了 ! England have won it!
诺比 Come on, nobby.
别乱开枪 集中注意力 Stop shooting everything and focus.
别担心 交给我吧 Don't worry. I've got this.
朱蒂 枪卡壳了 Jodie, me gun's jammed.
不 Oh, no.
打扰下 女士 Excuse me, miss.
什么 ? Yes?
滚你妹的 ! Go fuck yourself!
啊 ! Aah!
Yes! Yes!
Yes！我们成功了 小赛 ! Yes! We did it, seb!
耶 耶 ! Yeah! Yeah!
桑吉夫 就现在 ! Sanjiv, now!
- 收到 - 什么 ? 求你们了 别 ! Got it. What? Please, no! No!
永别了 塞巴斯蒂安 Goodbye, Sebastian.
不 ! No! No!
治愈世界 ! Cure the world!
不 ! No!
已经晚了 ! Too late!
烟花根本停不下来的 ! There's no way to stop the fireworks!
- 我跳上去盖住他们 - 没用的 I'll jump on them. It won't work.
病毒被密封在烟花的尖端 The virus is in the tip of the firework.
需要爆炸在 It would need to explode
一个密封的环境里 才可以阻止病毒传播 within a contained environment to stop it spreading.
你根本无能为力的 There's nothing you can do.
还有个方法 Yes, there is.
我是格林斯比人 I'm from grimsby.
朱蒂 病毒在哪个烟火里 ? Jodie, which firework is it in?
在中间左手的火箭里 It's in the central left-hand rocket.
- 你做什么 ? - 为社会主义做贡献 What are you doing? Contributing to society.
啊 ! Aah!
诺比 是你的左手方 不是我的左手方 Oh, nobby. It's the firework to your left, not my left.
我了个去 ! For fuck's sake!
告诉我的孩子们 老爸是英勇就义的 Tell my kids that daddy died with dignity.
诺比 能听见我么 ? 你身旁的那个火箭 Nobby, can you hear me? The firework next to you
一样有病毒 also has the virus.
什么 ? 不 What? No.
可我只有一个菊花 But I don't have another asshole.
我需要第二个菊花 I need another asshole.
交给我吧 You've got one.
我也是格林斯比人 I'm from grimsby too...
我再也不会让你离开我了 And I'm never gonna let you leave me again.
我的天啊 格雷夫 Oh, my god, graves.
格林斯比的布彻兄弟 兄弟齐心... Butcher boys of grimsby, together...
其利断金 Forever.
唐纳德·特朗普染上了艾滋 Donald trump has aids.
慈善家朗达·乔治被逮捕 Philanthropist Rhonda George has been arrested.
中东和平象征洛莫·哈立迪已被逮捕 Middle east peace symbol schlomo khalidi is in custody
罪名是谋杀军情六处特工 杰里米·奇尔科特 following the murder of MI6 agent Jeremy chilcott.
不是我杀的 这一周简直受不了了 I didn't do it. I've had the worst week ever.
滚你妹的以色列 滚你妹的巴勒斯坦 滚你们所有人 - Fuck Israel. - Fuck Palestine.Fuck all of you.
英国队粉丝们赛后情绪高涨 England fans in high spirits after cup final victory.
军情六处的叛逃特工 塞巴斯蒂安·格雷夫 Rogue MI6 operative Sebastian graves
以及他哥哥 诺比·布彻 and his brother nobby butcher
为了防止病毒扩散 died at the scene while preventing the release
死于世界杯 of a deadly toxin.
另一则消息 一位南非女佣 In other news, a south African hotel maid
起诉"绿洲乐队"主唱 连恩·盖勒格 has filed a suit alleging sexual assault
性侵她 by oasis frontman Liam Gallagher.
盖勒格同时在被通缉中 Gallagher is also being sought for abusing an elephant
疑和"速度与激情"影星 范·迪塞尔 一同虐待大象 in conjunction with fast and furious star vin diesel.
很明显 你们都需要新身份才行 Naturally, you'll both be needing new identities.
你们身体还好吧 ? How are you guys doing?
我屁股如何了 ? How does me ass look?
没什么 真的没什么 Good. Uh, really good.
这里好大烟味 能麻烦你把风扇打开吗 ? It's a bit smoky in here, Jodie. Can we have the fan on, please?
没问题 Uh, of course.
你们之所以没被感染 So you were saved from the virus
是因为大象精子里的抗体 by an antibody found in elephant semen,
也就是说... which lined, uh...
...你们体内的大象精子 ...your innards.
我俩的菊花正在奏乐呢 We're like a pair of pan pipes.
很好 Great.
我还以为你不会出轨的呢 塞巴斯蒂安 And I thought you were going to be faithful, Sebastian.
你填满了我生命里缺失的一部分 You know, you really filled a hole in my life.
嗨 ! Hiya!
- 诺比 - 老爸 - Nobby. - Dad.
天啊 Oh, my god.
真高兴你还活着 I'm so glad that you're alive.
知道吗 ? You know what?
家人 Family.
是生命里最棒的礼物 It's the greatest gift in life.
别丢硬币了 那里又不是许愿池 Stop throwing coins in there. It's not a brown wishing well.
图像正在传输中 You are now transmitting.
原地待命 盯住目标 Stand by. Stand by. Eyes on the target.
听着 我们正传送资料到你们的隐形眼镜上 Listen, we're sending information to your lens.
交给我吧 蓝色地球 I've got this. Blue earth.
嗨 老兄 Hiya, bruv.
- 很好 你提前到了 - 没错 Good, you're early. Yes, I am.
你和队友们见面没 ? Did you meet the team?
抱歉打扰下 足球场该怎么去 ? Excuse me. Which way to the stadium?
直走5千米 然后右转 Straight on for 5 kilometers, then to the right.
谢谢 Thank you.
不留目击证人 Leave no witnesses.
片名 : 王牌贱谍
指挥官塞巴斯蒂安·格雷夫 虎尾小队 军情六处
坎帕拉 乌干达
伦敦 英格兰
虎尾小队总部 军情六处黑色行动小组
旅者酒馆 格林斯比 英格兰
"世界灵药"慈善活动 伦敦 英格兰
欢迎回家 格林斯比的间谍 ! 嘘 !
开普敦 南非
哈拉雷乡 开普敦 南非
如果我喝躺了 请拨打07700 900489
哈拉雷乡 开普敦 南非
格拉西亚体育馆足球场 圣地亚哥 智利
"大漩涡"营地 圣地亚哥 智利
剧终
电影里的丹尼尔·拉德克利夫 并不是本人 而且他没有染上艾滋
电影里的唐纳德·特朗普 并不是本人
而且他没有染上艾滋(为什么两人这句话的风格不一样...)
八周后 雅加达 印度尼西亚
指挥官 诺比·布彻 虎尾小队
谢谢观看 CAST结束后还有彩蛋