--25.000
--Just back from the hunt ? - Just bringing home the bacon.
--The boars don't stand a chance with him on the job !
--By the way, we were ambushed by a platoon of Romans.
--Those Romans are crazy !
--Hail Centurion ! The platoon has returned to report to you, sir.
--Mamma mia !
--What is a going on here ?
--We were ambushed by two Gauls. - But they also had a very vicious dog.
--One dog and two Gauls.
--They seemed like two hundred, and they surprised us.
--These Gauls are making us the laughing stock of all of Rome.
--It's their secret vitamin potion that is making them so strong.
--There must be a way to get rid of the potion !
--What ? - We could just get rid of their wizard !
--That's it ! We get rid of the wizard and no more vitamin potion !
--Capture the wizard ! Dead or alive. Don't just stand here.
--Don't just stand there he says.
--And who are you ?
--Fantastic !
--Let's see !
--Hey !
--We got you !
--They got Panoramix ! - It was the Romans !
--No !
--Hurry !
--Oh great, just great Obelix ! - I scared off the Romans didn't I ?
--But what do we do with wizard now ? - Let's inflate him !
--Perhaps I could wake him with my music ?
--I swear chief it was just a tiny little rocket, just nicked him too.
--Hey everybody he's waking up - See ?
--How are you feeling Panoramix ? - Oh just fine !
--Who are you, monsieur ?
--Asterix, you know me, Asterix !
--Please to meet you.
--Asterix ? What a funny name !
--I'm so glad to see you well again Panoramix.
--It was just a little rocket !
--He didn't even noticed it.
--Oh the fat guy ! It's too much ! - Fat guy ?
--Panoramix snap out of it, it's you chief you must remember me.
--He's lost his memory. - Then let me sing for him !
--He's bound to remember my talent !
--Obelix we had better take him home. - Yes !
--Beautiful ! I want more ! - The wizard gone mad !
--He's crazy ! - He's really crazy !
--The wizard ? Where is he ? - But general we don't know !
--What ? - There was another ambush again !
--This time they had superior numbers ! - All right, how many ?
--Two. But they also had a big rocket launcher !
--A rocket ? - Those Gauls are crazy !
--We'll never get rid of them !
--The sky is falling on our heads !
--Is he any better ? - No not one bit.
--Let him get some rest, lets go see the chief.
--What do we do now ?
--If Panoramix had not gone deaf I know he could save us.
--Friends the sky is not falling, it's only a little storm.
--That's it, I'll sing us a little song and give us some courage.
--The God of thunder is upset with us ! - Don't panic !
--The Gods of our village will protect us !
--Have you seen ?
--Excuse me brave chief, invite the stranger in.
--Yes, yes sure... Let me out.
--Who are you ? - I am a lost and weary traveller.
--I was caught in this storm, I beg you give me shelter ..
--from this weather. Until it shall pass. I mean you no harm.
--Yeah, of course, my hut is your hut, anything I can do ..
--to make you more comfortable ! - I bet he must be really hungry.
--I think I have a little goats milk and a some wild boar.
--Gee I don't mind if I do.
--What's your name traveller ? - My name is Prolix.
--I knew I would be caught in this storm and I knew you would welcome me..
--into your hut and I knew I could count on your hospitality though ..
--I must say that your friend has a unusual way of sharing food with a hungry guest.
--But still I knew this was how it would be !
--But how could you see that ? - Because I see the future.
--The future ?
--Someone here does not believe me !
--I fear that he's only going to make things worse for you.
--Are you the one who doesn't believe ? - It wasn't me !
--Mr. Prolix, you must excuse my men, they love to fight.
--I know.
--Excuse me Mr. fortune teller, is the sky going to fall on our heads ?
--If I look at the insides of an animal I could tell you for sure.
--You could read the inside of this boar. - There is nothing left to read !
--But the insides of this dog could tell the future.
--I'm a very good dog reader.
--If you touch my little Idefix, you'll be taking an early retirement.
--Be careful Mr. Fortune-teller, Obelix's predictions are usually correct.
--Too bad, I guess you will never know if the sky is going to fall on your heads.
--Wait, will a fish do ? - A fish ? Well I suppose ..
--I could read the future in a fish.
--Fishso and suchiraw tell the future through my jaw now despite the ..
--unbelief I sense among you, I see, the sky will not fall upon your heads.
--And after the storm will follow sunny days !
--Oh thank you what a relief !
--Also I see there is going to be a fight !
--If Panoramix was here he would tell you that this man is a fake.
--It's safer to believe the fortune teller.
--But Asterix you heard the fish spoke.
--There is only one thing you can tell by looking at this fish.
--You gonna tell us ? - Whoever eats it is going to get sick.
--And why, may I ask, is that ? - Cause your fish are not very fresh !
--What do you mean they are not fresh ? - They stink !
--Well luckily the future is better than it smells.
--Sorry my friend but Asterix is right !
--Take your fish out of here !
--Hey friends and neighbours !
--After the storm, sunny days.
--But now I must go. Other villages will be needing my services.
--Thanks for your hospitality ! - Oh Mr. Prolix, don't go !
--Well... I could stay... - Well good riddance !
--If there's one thing I can't stand it's a fishy fortune teller.
--But he predicted the sun after the storm. - And he predicted the fight as well.
--The chief told him we fight all the time and when we talk..
--about your fish we fight more. - What do you mean ? !
--That your fishes stink as much as you ! !
--Chief, hold on to your temper, we've still got to find a cure for our wizard !
--Oh gosh I completely forgot about him in the excitement.
--Asterix what are we going to do to cure him ?
--I don't know, If he was well he could cure himself with the potion, oh, hey !
--Panoramix, can't you remember the formulas of your magic potions ?
--The potion ? What the heck is a potion little Gaul ?
--Panoramix, you have to understand, we must have the magic potion ..
--to defend against the Romans.
--Yes, but who is this Panoramix you keep talking about ?
--I don't know him !
--Don't worry about who that is, just try to make the magic potion !
--Yes, but what is this big pot ! What shall I do ?
--Just put the proper ingredients in it. - What is this fat guy carrying ?
--Asterix tell him not to call me fat wizard or no wizard,..
--I'll put this pot right on his head. - Stop Obelix, I you tried that already.
--It's funny !
--Yes, sure ! - He seems to remember the formulae.
--Shall I put this in ?
--If you think is the right thing to do ...
--What was that ? What was that ? What are they doing ?
--Hey !
--What is this ? - Let's go back to the camp !
--Mr. Fortune teller ? Mr. Fortune teller ?
--Mr. Fortune teller ?
--Prolix, wait for me !
--Oh wait for me Prolix !
--God are upset with you ! It is bad luck not to respect the fortune teller.
--No don't go, I respect you !
--What do you see in the future for me ?
--Please come back ! - There are two in the village who don't ..
--respect me, the man with moustache and the guy who didn't let me read his dog.
--But they are barbarians, don't let them bother you !
--If you had them thrown out then I could stay, what do you say ?
--Oh, but they protect our village, we need them. It's not possible !
--Then again with a little help I suppose I could settle in this clearing.
--Oh yes, and I will make sure Asterix and Obelix never come out here.
--And I can bring you everything you need to eat and drink.
--No, we fortune tellers lead a lonely life of quiet meditation.
--Just bring me a few things to read, wild boar, chicken, turkey, and a beer.
--Even with beer you can read the future ? - If it's not the first draught.
--I will bring you everything, butt tell me what does the future hold for me ?
--I read in the flight of this little birdy, ..
--that you will not need to spend the rest of your life in this little village.
--Oh but my husband is chief ! - He's called to a more important destiny.
--Perhaps my rich brother will make us partners with him in Lutezia.
--Absolutely. I was just going to say that now leave me while I meditate.
--Why doesn't it go boom ? - Perhaps it's going to work.
--And I am the Easter bunny. We better taste it, make sure there is no danger.
--I should taste it ! It's my fault the wizard forgot how to make it.
--Obelix as the village chief its my responsibility.
--No it's too dangerous ! We could offer it to a Roman for a taste test.
--Where are you going ? - We're looking for Romans.
--And maybe a few wild boars for a light snack in the woods.
--Obelix if you are hungry ! I'll invite you to my house for a great big lunch.
--Thank you madam but there isn't time. - I'm sure, but there is always..
--time for roast boar, isn't there Obelix ? - Oh I think so madam.
--But Obelix what about the Romans ? ! - Are you refusing an invitation ..
--from the chief's wife ? - No madam...
--Then shut up and lets move !
--What do you want ? - The platoon has returned.
--Get me out of here !
--The Gauls are making a lot of noise. - And they are taking pot shots at us !
--Pot-shots ? They are taking pot shots at my legionaries ?
--That is not fair ! - Nobody fights with cooking pots.
--The Gauls must be making a plan. - Lets leave them live in peace !
--Take this fool out of there, he just volunteered to spy on the Gauls.
--Come out of there now ! - No !
--I then order you to be cooked alive into that pot.
--You wouldn't do that ! - Guess again !
--Soldier are you coming out !
--Piggy wiggie ? We have guests for lunch.
--Piggy Wiggie ? You haven't called me that since the beginning of our marriage !
--I know I misjudged you piggy wiggie.
--Piggy wiggie ?
--Offer your friends a drink while I cook lunch Piggy Wiggie.
--Piggy wiggie ?
--What is it with you two ? - We're sorry Piggy Wiggie, I mean chief.
--Would you knock it off ? Why did you invite these two dummies ?
--Because they are the two best warriors I the village, Piggy Wiggie !
--The wizard is sick so the Romans could attack us, Piggy Wiggie.
--The Romans are too afraid to bother us ! - But we haven't got any potion !
--Asterix & Obelix should stay in the village and not go in the forest !
--No ! - Don't you agree, Piggy Wiggie ?
--You think it 's funny do you ? Then you can stay in the village and guard the wizard !
--Perfect piggy Wiggie ! - Eh ?
--You're going to blow my cover, go away !
--You still here ?
--Oh Prolix, I brought you a little something to read my future with.
--It's stuffed, there is nothing inside ! - Give it to me !
--I read stuffing as well.
--Oh oh oh ! Your future looks grand. !
--Mimmina ? - Yes ?
--What are you doing here Mimmina ? - Well I was just picking mushrooms.
--Yes, I was just picking mushrooms. - You haven't been very lucky !
--Do you want some of mine ? - Well oh can you keep a secret ?
--The fortune teller is in the woods and he read my future !
--But you mustn't tell anyone !
--And Diperdix is going to be very rich and he is going to give me lots of jewels.
--It's incredible ! - Right !
--Oh I have a secret to tell you. - But you mustn't tell anyone !
--The fortune teller is in the woods !
--I know, I'm bringing him some heavy reading.
--Enough with dead animals from now on I'll read in the gold !
--G home nice dog !
--Go away nice dog ! Go away !
--Look who we have here !
--What do you know Asterix, these crazy Romans are branching out all over the place.
--Stop !
--Please don't cook me again !
--Don't worry, we just want you to taste the soup.
--I think it needs a little work.
--Ah don't worry there Mr. Roman, were still working on the recipe.
--Oh no !
--I got him ! I got him !
- No !
--I got you !
--I made it ! I made it !
--How do you feel ? - Better !
--Light headed, really light headed.
--I'm too light headed ! Somebody catch me !
--Hey ! It's me ! - Who ?
--Don't even ask just give me rope.
--Centurion ! - Where is he and what is with this rope ?
--Have a look for yourself.
--What are you doing ? Get down ! - But there's no way !
--I'm as light as a butterfly in the wind.
--Lower that butterfly !
--The wizard is experimenting with a new potion and he won't stop laughing.
--Why did you drink ? Idiot !
--Take a platoon, find out what they are doing in their village.
--What we need is another Roman. - You're right !
--Matusalemmix, where are you going ? - I'm having a beer in the forest..
--What ?
--Something very strange is happening around here.
--They're all going into the forest while we are stuck here doing nothing.
--Hey chief !
--What is going on in that forest ? Obelix you guard the wizard
--I'll be back as soon as I can.
--Anyone here ?
--You chased him out, the chief told .. you not to come into the forest !
--Chased who ? - The fortune teller !
--Great disaster will befall us ! Asterix has chased the fortune teller !
--Ave centurion ! - Ave, what have you got ?
--I was leading the platoon to the Gaulish village and we discovered this intruder ..
--in the forest and his story is very interesting, so I brought him to you sir.
--Let's see him !
--A prisoner from Gaul ? Why did you take him here ?
--Excuse me mister Gaul, you are one of these super strong Gauls, the enemy ?
--Me, oh no, I am a peaceful man, I am against no one at all.
--That is nice.
--Voila, my name is Prolix. I travel about in search of a patron.
--Yes I knew that here I would find a soldiers that was strong and generous,..
--even if some of his less sensible troupes didn't show me ..
--the respect that they should.
--What then, I knew all this before !
--Well done, so tell me how you are knowing all that ?
--Well I'm a fortune teller. - A fortune teller ?
--So you are a fortune teller of the Gauls of the near village ?
--Yes sir, for example I foresee that you will be promoted and achieve great plans.
--So am I going to conquer the Gauls ? - You guess well !
--Magnifico, unfortunately for you we are under orders to arrest fortune tellers.
--What, what well I, in that case no more joking, I mean I am not a fortune teller !
--That was just a little joke ! In fact I am a bit of a rascal.
--Come here ! - No please, don't arrest me !
--I'm not a real fortune teller !
--But you were saying that I am going to get a promotion ?
--It's a joke ! That is absolutely absurd ! - Well that makes sense.
--What do you mean by that ? Hold your tongue !
--I'm going to give you a little test. Heads or tails ?
--Neither, neither one.
--Bingo ! You predicted right !
--Than you must be a real fortune teller !
--But it's not true ! It's very easy for a coin to fell like that !
--Put this man in chains.
--But I'm not a fortune teller ! I'm a fake ! I flatter the people of the village !
--I tell them what they want to hear so they believe me, anything, anything I say !
--So the Gauls believe anything you say ? - Yes ! Yes !
--So may be you can be useful than !
--Yes sir !
--Your actions have been unworthy ! It's dangerous to anger a fortune teller !
--He is an impostor, he takes all your money to make himself fat !
--He's out there right now looking for a whole new bunch of suckers !
--I don't think he was an impostor, he said all the right things.
--Please Mrs. Chief, open your eyes ! - Open your eyes ? Open your eyes !
--He was a wise man !
--Oh my gosh, it is Prolix, the fortune teller ! He is back.
--Yes people of Gaul !
--I have returned, to tell you that Gods are very upset with you !
--Yes your village is doomed !
--Even your air will be poisonous soon !
--lt'll become revolting ! Poison ! Your faces will turn pale !
--You will loose the colour of life !
--Please get away before it is too late !
--I tell you it is your only hope ! Now everyone has been warned !
--Did you hear him ?
--I will not stay another minute in this doomed village, lets go to Lutezia !
--Have you gone nuts, you are not going to abandon our village on account of fur face !
--But if on the off chance he might be right, we would all be doomed.
--I think we should move to the little island that is right off the coast.
--But Piggy Wiggie it's in Lutezia that... - Don't be silly, when the danger ..
--is clear we will come back.
--Asterix, shall we go ?
--No, I stay !
--Everybody else get to the boats !
--May be I should sing for you ! - Shut up !
--Obelix are you leaving ?
--Well...no I'll stay !
--All aboard who is going aboard !
--The Romans can attack whenever they like now.
--I guess we should hide.
--That is it, mission accomplished ! the Gauls have left their village.
--I am not surprised, I knew all along that all along you were a real fortune teller.
--Arrest him now ? - You promised you would let me go !
--No ! I am first going to check to make sure that the Gaul village is clear.
--I knew it ! - I'll bet !
--No, no that is not what I meant, I didn't know at all, I am not a fortune teller !
--It was just a haunch ! That's all, that's all !
--Look the fortune teller is leading the Romans right into our village.
--The fortune teller and the Romans, of course the are in this together.
--We can't let them take our village ! - No Obelix !
--It's too dangerous !. We haven't got any magic potion !
--All we can do is sit here and keep an eye on Panoramix.
--This place is deserted, completely deserted, Sir.
--Go to Rome and carry this message to Caesar: you tell him: all of Gaul ..
--is occupied ! Then he will ask: 'Totally ?' And you will say to him: 'Totally !'.
--He will understand.
--As Caesar would say, gentlemen we came, we saw and we won them.
--Bravo Prolix you are really good !
--So Should I arrest him now, since he is a real fortune teller.
--But, but, it is not true ! I told you it's not true !
--Are you saying I would not be promoted ? - But I could not know that.
--What do you see ? - I told you I don't make predictions !
--The truth, or I will read my future on your own insides !
--Oh, yes you will get a promotion ! - So we arrest him ?
--No ! A fortune teller could be useful. - But sir orders are orders !
--I say if he is a real fortune teller we arrest him !
--But I am not ! Remember I predicted a curse on the air of the village ?
--Hey wait a minute !
--Don't you think there is a strange odour here ?
--A strange odour ? - It's true !
--I haven't asked for your opinion !
--Centurion, the air is unbreathable in the village. It stinked !
--Stinks ? What do you mean by that ?
--Great, Gods are with you Prolix ! - It's not possible !
--It's not possible ! No !
--It's not possible ! It's not possible !
--It's not possible !
--It's not possible ! It's not possible ! It's not possible !
--Trumpeter, sound the evacuation of this place on the double !
--I made it ! I made it once again !
--Obelix !
--This is all my fault !
--And to think it is all because I threw that stupid little rocket !
--I was out of my mind ! Completely out of my mind !
--Asterix ?
--Asterix !
--You called me Asterix ! - Asterix !
--Panoramix you are cured !
--Obelix ! Did you throw this rock on Panoramix ?
--Absolutely to try and cure the wizard. Don't tell me I did the wrong thing !
--This is great, I can't believe it, our wizard is still safe.
--Good boy ! - What do you mean still ? I just cured ..
--But baby as soon as everything settles down we will go back to the village.
--On this island I'll never get my jewels. - You're right !.
--If only our wizard was here, hey little fishy when he had his marbles
--You are scaring the fish, cut it out.
--him with my own delicate treatment.
--At ease.
--This is much better.
--What, But we had to retreat from the village we just conquered.
--So, thanks to the fortune teller we have no more Gauls, that is the main thing.
--Good so now I can arrest him. - Absolutely not !
--Excuse me, a beg your pardon, I don't think I quiet understand.
--That is why I am a Centurion and you are just a soldier !
--Come along, I want to talk with you.
--Bighead !.
--You predict our fates, you are a true fortune teller !
--You knew there would be a disaster and it came.
--Then I must be a real fortune teller. - You should be placed under arrest.
--I am sure I must be a fake ! - But you could be useful to me.
--I am not a fake ! - With your predictions and advice...
--I am a fortune teller ! - .. I could go very far !
--Maybe I will even replace Caesar.
--Of course I would be very generous.
--I'm a fortune teller ! I'm a fortune teller !
--Make up your mind because if you're not real, we'll tear you apart !
--Please sit down and tell me a little bit more about my future.
--But I already told you that the Gods will give you protection !
--And you will be promoted ! - I know that !
--Tell me how it will be when I am Caesar ! - Well you will be real powerful !
--The Romans will fear you ! - Very good !
--Very good and Cleopatra ? - What is Cleopatra ?
--You never heard of Cleopatra ? - Oh yes,Cleopatra silly me, Cleopatra !
--She will be crazy for you she will be head over heels for you and after ...
--Fortune-teller !
--Who are you ? - You mean you don't know ?
--What do you want ? - You are the lucky winner Prolix !
--Winner ? Winner of what ? - It is a surprise !
--Surprise, what kind of a surprise ? - Can't you guess fortune teller ?
--Well yes of course, I was only asking. A surprise. Wait it is coming to me.
--Fortune teller, tell the man your surprise.
--What is that noise ? - How would I know ?
--The Gauls and you didn't let me know. - How was I supposed to know ?
--Leave him to me !
--So you couldn't guess we were here eh fortune teller ? And Lutezia ?
--Piggy Wiggie partners with my brother ? it was all a lie, shame on you !
--You're just a cheat ! - Bravo Madam ! ! Very good !
--Go girls !
--Hey who are you ? - I am Caius Blocus !
--Special envoy to Caesar.
--Hey Dog beater !
--Hello everybody ! How are you ! At your orders centurion !
--Julius Caesar asked me to come and see if you really and truly had conquered..
--these fearsome and rebellioushed Gauls.
--You are an embarrassment ! They conquered you.
--Come on everybody lets go home !
--But it is not my fault ! Shut up, you have been demoted !
--You are a legionnaire and even that is too generous !
--Back to Rome !
--So I am going to be promoted am I ? Centurion Arrest this impostor !
--I will not take order from some low ranking legionaire !
--You'll clean up this entire mess alone and speak properly to your superior !
--Oh go on, get out, I don't want civilians in my camp !
--After the storm, Sunny days, sunny days.
--Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0