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* 奶子世界 奶子世界 * * Boob world, boob world. *
* 一个全新的世界 不对 是两个耶 * * It's a world for you, but it's actually two. *
* 奶子世界 * * Boob World! *
说真的 莫蒂 你让我一起去的想法有点儿奇怪 I gotta say, Morty, it's weird that you wanted me to come,
不过我真的可兴激亢了 but I'm actually exstyched about it --
兴奋+激动+亢奋 that's excited, stoked, and psyched.
我才没想让你来 跟瑞克讲去 I didn't want you to come. Talk to Rick.
其实呢 夏茉 过去30年里 Truth is, Summer, Boob World's been at the center
奶子世界一直处在多起抗议的漩涡中心 of a few protests every day for 30 years,
所以那边开始把品牌重塑成奶子赋权体验了 so they've recently rebranded as a boob empowerment experience,
如果有女性同行 就可以免费入场 and if we bring a female, we get in for free.
那要是你们去六面旗乐园 我就是用来换折扣的可乐罐呗 So, I'm, like, what, a Coke can you're taking to Six Flags?
并不 毕竟一进六面旗的大门 No, 'cause once you get into Six Flags,
就可以扔掉可乐罐了 you can throw your Coke can away.
妈的不是吧 No fucking way.
怎么可能 It can't be.
啊操操操操 快看啊 Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit. Oh, look at that.
-看什么 -某只五创神貂 -What is it? -It's a GoTron ferret.
GoTron一词是战神金刚Voltron和百兽王GoLion的融合 在日语中Go是"五"的意思 指组合成机器人的五只机器狮及对应驾驶员 故译作"五创"
这可不是某只五创神貂 莫蒂 It's not a GoTron ferret, Morty.
这是独一无二的五创蓝貂 It's the blue GoTron ferret.
-奶子欢乐行取消 -别啊瑞克 -Boob World is canceled. -No, Rick, no.
你保证过的 怎么总这样啊 You promised. You always do this.
这样吧 莫蒂 我让你来选 Tell you what, Morty, I'll let you choose.
你真的觉得奶子世界 Do you really think Boob World -
-对 -听我说完 -Yes! -Let me finish.
-能比拥有 -对 -Is more important -- -Yes.
听我说完 比拥有全宇宙仅有的五只五创神貂更重要吗 Let me finish! Than have all five of the only five GoTron ferrets in the universe?
屁放完了么 对 还不快走 Are you finished? Yes. So, let's go.
夏茉 帮我把神貂挂上绞盘 Summer, help me hook the winch up to the ferret.
-好呀 -什么玩意 -Sure. -What the hell?!
你说了让我来选的 You said you were letting me choose.
可不 我让你选要不要伤老子的心 Yeah, whether to break my fucking heart.
你选错了 You chose badly.
故事就这样开始了 That's how it all began.
在我姐看来 这不过是又一场游戏 To my sister, it was just another game.
但她不知道的是 But what she didn't know --
从这一刻起一切都变了 That was the moment everything changed.
等会 怎么回事 Wait. What?
我第一次品尝到了受尊重的滋味 第一次拥有了自己的画外音 I had gotten my first taste of respect and my first voiceover.
我听得见你 你听得见我吗 I can hear you. Can you hear me?
也意识到 被尊重和画外音还远不能让我满足 And I knew then and there I wanted more of both.
喂 Hello?
瑞克和莫蒂
第五季 第七集
贝丝 杰瑞 一块去找点乐子吧 Beth, Jerry, do something fun with us.
尼布吕格星系受到了巨型怪兽的攻击 A giant monster is attacking in the Nibblenug system.
你们的战服在厕所呢 Your suits are in the bathroom.
我这件一股腐尸味 Mine smells skeletony.
我预约了脊椎正骨 I have a chiropractor appointment.
你又要带我们趟什么浑水 What are you involving us in?
瑞克在收集五创神貂 Rick's been collecting GoTron ferrets,
现在五个都集齐了 我们可以合体来个 and now that he has all five, we can combine them into --
莫蒂 你他妈又剧透 Morty, for Christ's sake spoilers.
不许剧透 莫蒂 Spoilers, Morty.
这么酷的事 根本不需要卖力推销 WE don't need to sell this to anyone.
知道有巨型怪兽来袭就好 There's a giant monster attacking.
在尼布吕格星系诶 In the Nibblenug system.
这家啥时候关心起外星人的性命了 Since when does this house care about alien lives.
咱们连英国电视都懒得看的 We don't even watch British television.
说什么来着 我们去找隔壁的基因再拉上个流浪汉吧 Told you. Let's just get Gene from next door and a homeless guy.
不 稍等 No. Hold on.
去他妈的基因 去他妈的流浪汉 Fuck Gene. Fuck the homeless.
你俩的孩子和他们外公求你们一起去家庭活动 Your kids and their grandpa are asking you to do an activity with them.
这种家长们梦到都会湿的机会 你俩咋没点兴趣 When did that stop being a parent's wettest dream?
怕是因为咱家搞出了一个 I guess around the time our family created
巨型乱伦婴儿 还被政府 a giant incest baby, and the government
发射上天了吧 launched it into space.
天呐 我们搞出了一个巨型乱伦婴儿 Oh my God, we made a giant incest baby.
天呐 你搞不好是克隆人 Oh my God, you might be a clone.
我活在世上就是你俩没敢去打胎 I exist because you guys failed to abort me.
摊上什么家人就是什么家人 没得挑 We get the family we get, not the one we want.
但是你俩要是还想有家人 And if you want to keep the one you got,
就赶紧给你们的肥臀来套动漫制服诱惑 get your asses into some anime spacesuits.
-有理 -好嘞 -Fair enough. -Okay.
说得好 夏夏令营 Good work, Summer Camp. Yeah.
我可兴激了 I'm exci-toked about this.
哟 才来劲啊 Sure you are -- now.
风暴正在酝酿 而我正在乌云之下 Something new was forming, and I was at the bottom of it.
我让莫蒂也有了他的画外音 他也就剩下这点东西了 I let Morty have his voiceover. It's really all he had left.
好吧 你能听到我吗 Okay, can you hear me or not?
你是想问本小姐夏茉能听到你吗 Do you mean can I, Summer, hear you?
不 是我的画外音能听到你的画外音 No. My voiceover can hear your voiceover.
有区别吗 What's the difference?
有一种是心电感应啊 二逼 One would be telepathy, dumbass.
现在干嘛 Now what?
现在我们 Now, we --
五创小队出击 Go, Team GoTron!
我们要沿着这未来感十足的金属通道滑去哪儿啊 Where are we zip-lining through futuristic metallic tunnels to?
神貂机甲在地球上都有各自的藏身处 Each robot ferret is at a different location on Earth.
你要进到火山深处 You're going to the center of a volcano.
那谢谢您嘞 Thank you?
好吧 也没那么无聊 Okay, well, this isn't not fun.
跟我合体 Regroup on me.
我向尼布吕格开一个传送门 I'll shoot a portal to Nibblenug.
我刚刚从我家厨房坐单轨电车到了夏威夷 Did I just monorail from my kitchen to Hawaii
就为了在厨房上方的外太空跟你合体吗 just to regroup in outer space above my kitchen?
-呃 夏茉 -这很酷的 老爹 闭嘴吧 -Uh, Summer? -It's cool, Dad. Shut up.
各位 逐一出击 Everybody, attack one at a time!
这样真的能 Is that the best way to --
给出漂亮一击吗 没错 跟上我 Tee up something awesome? Yes. Follow me.
家人们 我们尽力了 现在只剩一线希望 Guys, we did our best, but there's only one hope.
启动对接 Activating link-dock.
互联变形 最酷化 合体程度 最大化 Inter-Morphs -- rad-ified. PostiTrinos -- maximized.
妈的 没想到真的能行啊 Holy shit, I-I can't believe this is working.
全体出击 五创来袭 Go, go, team! It's GoTron time!
天啊 牛逼 Oh, my God. Hell yes!
爽 This is amazing!
可以踢踢打打一番了 Okay, now we can knock it around a little bit,
不过听好了 我们尚在渐入佳境 but trust me, we're still building to something.
-怎么操作 -摁按钮就行了 -How do we -- -Just hit buttons.
我们现在坚不可摧 We're too big to fail.
我踢到他了 是我踢的吧 I kicked him! That was me, right?
上勾拳 Uppercut!
不敢相信我差点就去做正骨了 I can't believe I almost went to the chiropractor!
这一刻我等太久啦 I've been waiting a long time for this.
组成光芒神剑 Form Luminous Energy Sword!
去死吧 珈玛老妈 That's your ass, Mamma Jamma.
-太牛逼了 外公 -牛逼 -So tits, grandpa. - So tits.
-我是五创的一只脚 -太过瘾了 -I was a foot! I was a GoTron foot! - I feel so alive!
真是美好的时光啊 These were the good times,
那一刻我们感觉自己无所不能 when we felt like we could do anything.
但其实并没有那么"无所不能" But anything is never quite everything.
没过多久 And pretty soon...
这个相比于我们能达到的成就简直微不足道 That was nothing -- nothing compared to what we can do.
还有无限多个宇宙里的我没有集齐五创神貂 There are infinite universes where I still don't have all five ferrets.
那些宇宙的我也会为了完成收集无所不用其极 Th-th-those versions of me would do anything to complete their collections.
好吧 但是瑞克 忘了你让我提醒你的话吗 Okay, but Rick, remember what you told me to remind you?
有时候 得适可 Sometimes, enough is...
有时候 得适可而止 Sometimes, enough is enough.
莫蒂 你想干嘛 Morty, what are you doing?
他上瘾了 夏茉 He gets obsessed, Summer -
你几时能意识到自己有多讨厌啊 When are you going to find your shame?
-还能讨厌过你吗 -外公刚让一家人体验人生的高光 -I have more? -Grandpa just gave everybody the high point of their lives,
而且出发前 你们都在劝他不要这么搞 and before he did, every single one of you was trying to talk him out of it.
等会 是啊 什么鬼 Wait. Yeah. Wha-wha-what the fuck!
现在他说我们还能玩得更嗨 结果真意想不到呢 Now, he says we can go higher, and big surprise,
又开始劝他收手了 it's time to drag him down again.
-我要投票 -投个头 -Well, I vote -- -No voting.
讨论个屁 去他娘的民主 No debate. It's not a democracy.
瑞式共和 不同意就滚蛋 It's a Rickpublic. You're in or you're out.
显然我同意啊 我可没说不同意 Obviously, I'm in. I never said I wasn't in.
我也加入 说说下一步做什么吧 Me, neither. Tell us what we're doing next.
我想来一次野炊 Uh, I want to put together a cookout.
吹
就这 讲真我都准备好吹个谁了 That's it? I was honestly prepared to blow someone.
-杰瑞 -我说的是"准备"和"谁" -Jerry. -I said "prepared" and "someone."
瑞克从不同宇宙邀请了我们家的五个版本 Rick invited five versions of our family from different universes,
每家都没集齐五创 each with incomplete GoTrons.
我没人可说话 I didn't have anyone to talk to,
因为那四个莫蒂都去过奶子世界 since the other four Mortys had been to Boob World.
你去海滩漫步了吗 Did you walk on the beach?
那个全是奶子的海滩吗 The beach that's all boobs?
没 我去的是那个全是沙子的海滩 No, the beach that's all sand.
是不是傻 当然是奶子的那个呀 Yes, the boob one!
瑞克和五个家庭的头头在车库里 Rick was in the garage with the heads of the five families.
呕 还有夏茉 Ugh, and Summer.
第一次会面中 In that first sit-down,
有大胖瑞克 it was Big Fat Rick,
蒙大拿瑞克 暴躁瑞克 Ricardo Montaya, Hot Head Rick --
他叫这名字是因为他很容易戏剧化地爆发 he got that name because he was prone to dramatic outbursts -
还有收尾小小瑞克 会议结尾时他总是超赞 and Lil' Ricky Wrap-it-Up, who was always great at the end of a meeting.
而核心人物就是 我和瑞克外公 At the head of it all, me and Grandpa Rick.
别误会我了 C-137 Now, don't get me wrong, C-137,
你发迹了 我们替你高兴 we're happy for your good fortune.
但是我们来你的宇宙 不是为了让你在我们脸前炫耀的 But we did not travel to your universe just to have it rubbed in our faces.
别介啊 大胖瑞克 你的脸那么小 没法在你脸前炫耀 Come on, Big Fat Rick, you know your face is too small to rub anything on.
我的脸和你的脸一样大 My face is the same size as yours.
哇哦 等下 Wow. Huh. Hold on.
我勒个去 I'll be damned.
你都胖出光学幻觉了 You're so fat you're an optical illusion.
夏茉 给他们讲讲 Summer, give 'em the pitch.
我们想要帮助你们每一家集齐自己的五创 We're offering to help each of your families complete their full GoTrons.
而你们也需要做一点让步 In exchange for some concessions.
我还是贫民窟的小男孩时 Ever since I was a little boy in the slums,
就梦想着集齐五创 I have dreamed of having a complete GoTron.
但是让步 But concessions?
你说的是买东西打折的那种让步吧 I hope you mean the kind from a counter.
她是想买冰激凌吗 I hope she means ice cream!
我们希望你们把家安到这个宇宙来 然后让我 We'd like you to relocate your families to this universe, and let me make some
对五创做一些改动 我们就能合作了 modifications to the GoTrons -- in the interest of us all working together.
想知道我怎么想的吗 Want to know what I think?
当然了 暴躁瑞克 只要别莫名其妙发脾气就行 Sure, Hothead Rick, just don't unexpectedly fly off the handle.
我觉得你们的优越感实在是太胆大包天了 I think you guys got a lot of nerve acting better than us!
就是这家人弄出个巨型乱伦婴儿 This is the family that made a giant incest baby!
搞得政府把它发射进太空 Had the government launch it into space!
还在哪儿飘着呢 It's still floatin' around out there somewhere!
这事儿什么时候能翻篇啊 Are we ever gonna live that down?
要是我集齐了五创 也绝不是拍你马屁换来的 If I get a full GoTron, it won't be by kissing your ass,
一定是我堂堂正正抢来的 抢你的 it'll be by taking what's mine -- yours!
恶心 何必呢 Hey! Gross! No need.
你开的是 貂吗 And you were driving... a ferret?
大家都开的貂 二货 把钥匙给我 We all are, moron! Give me key!
你们会后悔的 一群冷静的蠢货 You'll regret this, you level-headed fucks.
我们当然猜到可能会发生这种情况 Obviously, we predicted that might happen,
所以我们找了悠悠瑞克候补 which is why we have Yo-Yo Rick on standby.
有人和悠悠有过节嘛 Anybody got beef with Yo-Yo?
有些人觉得他很逊 但是在我看来 Some people think he's lame, but to me,
他逊得很酷 因为他即使逊也很骄傲 he's lame in a cool way because he owns it.
酷 那事儿就谈妥了 小小瑞克 收尾吧 Cool. That concludes business. Lil' Ricky Wrap it Up?
走一个 哥几个 Raise 'em up, boys!
干杯 Oh-pah!
就这样 我们帮这些伙伴定位到神貂 And so, we helped our people find their ferrets.
至于怎么抢到手的 我们不关心 How they got them, not our problem.
之后就可以开工了 Then, we got down to business.
大概是这样运作的 Here's how it worked --
如果有巨型怪兽袭击你的星球 if a giant monster attacked your planet,
我们都会收到警报 we all got the alert.
♪ 妈妈咪亚 要打包一份意面 ♪ ♪ Hey, hey, Mama Mia's Got a plate of spaghetti for the takin' ♪
♪ 爸爸比亚 造了只巨大机甲 ♪ ♪ Papa pia's got a great big robot that he's makin' ♪
♪ 我双眼映出两轮明月 ♪ ♪ I got the moon in both my eyes ♪
♪ 你抱着一整碗披萨派 ♪ ♪ You got a bowl of pizza pie, hey! ♪
♪ 来点意面 加点日漫 ♪ ♪ A bit of pasta with some anime combined, yeah ♪
我们组成了五个五创 We formed five GoTrons.
这些五创再组成五五创 And those GoTrons formed the GoGoTron.
五五创 出击 Go, GoGoTron!
♪ 开动了 哥几个 ♪ ♪ Take it away, boys! ♪
老子永远玩不腻 I will never get sick of this!
如果你刚巧是一只巨型怪兽 出现在我们的宇宙里 If you were a giant monster at that time, in our universe,
你就别想活了 you never had a chance.
♪ 来点意面 加点日漫 ♪ ♪ A bit of pasta with some anime combined ♪
♪ 我们风格迥异 却也交织缠绕 ♪ ♪ 'Cause we're two genres, but each one is intertwined, yeah ♪
我的座驾需要一个悠悠球似的武器 Mine needs a weapon like a Yo-Yo.
胸前画个悠悠球 你有在听吗 And a Yo-Yo on the chest. Are you listening to me?
我需要你尊重彼此的合作 I-I need you to respect this partnership.
我替瑞克搞定那些见不得光的活 I kept Rick removed from the ugly stuff.
如果你挡他的道了 我会把你清走 If you got in his way, I got you out of the way.
这也就创造了更多上升空间 And that made more room to move up.
我左臂的头领 The head of my right arm.
我呢 我流落到了左脚的左脚位置 Me? I ended up the left foot of the left foot --
可能因为我们的机甲没有大屁眼子吧 I guess because our robot didn't have an asshole.
你不就是个大屁眼子吗 Well, it had one.
贱人 你能不能不要坏我好事了 Bitch! When are you gonna stop breaking my balls?
你已经赢了好吧 You win, okay?
又不是在跟你竞争 莫蒂 我就这么说吧 We're not competing, Morty. And there's your answer.
你要是能把家庭放在第一位 我就给你晋升 I could move you up if I could trust you to put family first.
这算哪门子家庭第一 H-how is that putting family first?
把所有蓝图都给我 把所有蓝图都给我 Show me all the blueprints! Show me all the blueprints!
有道理 这是个问题 I agree. That's an issue.
大胖瑞克 把他酒瓶子满上 Big Fat Rick, his flask stays full
不然就卷铺盖走人吧 多谢 or your locker gets empty. Thanks.
我知道招他喜欢是种什么感受 I know it feels good when he likes you,
但不代表那能让你变得更好 but that doesn't mean him liking you makes you good.
莫蒂 你逼逼得有理 Solid babble, Morty
听着像波拉特写出来的饼干幸运签 -- like a fortune cookie written by Borat.
《波拉特》 2006年拉里·查尔斯执导的喜剧影片
是 我不像你那么聪明 Yeah, I'm not as smart as you.
所以我知道你懂我什么意思 That's why I know you know what I mean.
你的意思是 如果我真的爱家人 You mean, if I really loved my family,
我会把控制权交还到你这个吃醋精手里 I'd give control of it back to your jealous ass.
绿貂四号需要清洗 我们的清洁剂用完了 Green Ferret Four needs a wash, and we're out of detergent.
我刚买了一箱 I just bought a box.
外公把那一箱都吸了 因为你让他觉得被孤立了 And Grandpa snorted it because you make him feel fenced in.
小夏夏 Sum-Sum?
买两箱 Get two boxes.
我们疏散了所拯救的一个星球 We evacuated one of the planets we saved,
并在那建立了一家私密夜总会 and built a secret nightclub on it,
在这儿敌人找不上门 a place no enemies could find us --
除非你把我老弟也算作敌人 unless you count my brother.
我已经没有自己的神貂了 I didn't even have my own ferret anymore.
夏茉让我当个莫名其妙的 Summer made me something called
副安全总管 an "associate security chief" --
鬼知道那是什么意思 whatever the hell that means.
瞧瞧这货 Look at this guy.
还有这货 都好好瞧瞧这货 And look at this guy. Look-look at this guy over here.
哇 她在这里 我的公主小宝贝 Oh, there she is! My Baby Princess!
快上来 别奏乐了 Get up here. Stop the music.
她就是我们的女娲 女女王 This. Is. Our. Queef -- O-our Queen.
她拯救了我 让我重返自由 She saved my life. She-she set me free.
没有这个疯婆子 我们谁都无法拥有现在的一切 We wouldn't have what we have without this crazy bitch.
现在她有一项特别通告 And she's got a special announcement.
夏茉 跟各各位讲讲是什么事 Summer, tell 'em wha-what we talked about.
现在么 我感觉不太 Now? I don't think --
行吧我来 妈蛋 Okay, I'll do it. God damn.
新职位也确实提供了些许好处 The new job did have some perks --
比如 我能亲眼目睹到 夏茉意识到自己做过头了 like, I got to be around the night Summer realized she was in over her head.
我多出来了90只神貂 所以还需要再找到10只 Okay, I've got 90 extra ferrets, which means I need 10 more,
这样你们其中四人就可以驾驶五五创 and then four of you get your own GoGoTron,
20%的人会分到一台五创 and 20% of you get a GoTron,
这样我们就可以拥有一台神他妈五五五创 'cause we're all gonna have a fucking GoGoGoTron.
他太激动了 He's very excited. Um...
恨死我家人 I hate my family.
应该的 You should.
上车 Get in.
你外公的强迫症行为怎么样了 How's it going with your grandpa's compulsiveness?
你姐还在纵容么 哈 Is your sister still enabling it? Huh?
你们是什么人 Who are you people?
知道我们是神貂的合法拥有者就好 Let's just say we're the rightful owners of these ferrets.
那为什么那些机甲都破破烂烂地掩藏在了宇宙深处 Then, why were they scattered, and buried across the universe?
我们说的是更广义 文化层面的拥有 We mean in a more general, cultural sense. Arrrgh!
你外公这行为叫"文化挪用" What your Grandpa did is called "appropriation."
垃圾 啊啊啊 Not cool! Hunnnnngh!
听着莫蒂 我们一直在关注你们 Look, Morty, we've been watching.
知道你才是最有是非观的人 We know you're the one that knows what's best.
给我们当间谍吧 Work with us from the inside.
帮我们夺回这一切 Help us take over this operation.
我们的设定本就是机甲驾驶者 We're literally designed for it. Mm-hmmmmmm!
没人会发现内鬼是你 Nobody will know it was you.
之后 你就能重新专注于要事了 Then, you can get back to what's important.
这些是奶子币么 Are those Boob Bucks?
每个售货亭和游乐设施都可使用 Legal tender at every kiosk and ride! Huuunh!
不行 I can't.
夏茉待我如敝履 但终究是我姐 Summer's treating me like shit, but she's still my sister.
还真是高尚呢 莫蒂 That's really noble, Morty.
你若是我们家庭中的一员 必会奖赏你的忠诚 If you were in our family, your loyalty would be rewarded.
但你不是 所以我们大可以宰了你 But you're not in our family, which means we can kill you.
是吗 Oh, yeah?
没错 就在我为了家人们出头反击时 And sure enough, just when I stuck my neck out for the family,
我被迎头痛击了 it got stomped on anyway.
-爸 -妈 爸 -Dad! -Mom! Dad!
俺暴躁瑞克去也 Hothead Rick, baby!
我真是自找的 I set myself up for that!
-妈的出了什么事 -暴躁瑞克来了 -What the hell happened?! -Hothead Rick.
他怎么找到这里的 How did he get so close to us?
莫蒂不是该负责安保吗 Morty was supposed to be security!
-莫蒂 -我我我我溜了 好吧 -Morty? -I-I-I stepped away, alright?
但不是为了放他进来 But-but not to let that happen!
莫蒂 我们不是什么坐在你飞往巴黎的航班上 Morty, we're not attractive strangers next to you on a flight to Paris,
排解失恋之苦的邻座帅哥美女 traveling alone to get over a breakup,
少在这扭扭捏捏的 so this is no time to be coy!
小小瑞克 Lil' Ricky.
我全都搞定了 夏茉 I'm all wrapped up, Summer.
各位 我知道你们不信任我 Guys, I know you don't trust me,
但我们都变成什么人了 but what have we become?
为什么我们还在继续这项行动 Why are we doing this anymore?
因为好玩啊 你个臭内鬼 Because it's fun, you little rat.
回家玩电游去吧 我们来给他们收尸 Now go home, and play video games while we clean up these bodies,
不然我和你妈就雇人打断你的腿 or your mother and I will hire people to break your knees!
这是我们踩坏了房车营地之后 This is $16,000 we got from the deep state
从影子政府那拿到的16000块钱 for stepping on that trailer park.
应该够你学校伙食和家里装修的费用了 That should be enough for school lunch and home repairs.
现在我要抛弃你了 Now, I gotta turn my back on you.
不要啊 No!
莫蒂出局后 一切看起来蒸蒸日上 With Morty out of the way, things were looking up.
但眼看不一定为实 But looks aren't everything.
夏茉 我的驾驶舱接不到Wi-Fi Hi, Summer. Um, my cockpit's not getting Wi-Fi.
老爹 你明知道我不管这档子事 Dad, you know that's not what I do around here.
我不是你亲爹 只是其中一个爹 Oh, I'm not your Dad. I'm a version of him.
这是我第一天过来 This is my first day here,
我也不清楚你负责哪些事情 and I-I'm not sure what you do around here.
-那就死开 -去死吧你 -Then fuck off. -Oh, fuck you.
你说什么 我要看你的身份证明 Excuse me? I want your ID.
老妈 是你吗老妈 Mom. Are you Mom?
你能去管一下你那个新手杰瑞吗 Can you control your rookie Jerrys?
亲爱的 我们都很忙的 Sweetie, we're all a little overwhelmed -
有理 你不是那种战备老妈 Good point. You're not a war-time Mom.
那不如带上你那个世界的我爹 Why don't you find your version of Dad,
休息休息 放个长假咯 and take a break, take a holiday.
我没空等你确认回复 I don't have time to wait for your confirmation,
我把话撂这 你要是十分钟内还不走 so let's just say, if you're here in 10 minutes,
我就轰你走 I'll have you removed.
然后五创合成五创 And then, the GoTrons make the GoTrons,
再合成五创 再合成五创 make the GoTrons, make the GoTrons.
出了点岔子 但我知道怎样可以加快进度了 Couple of snags, but I know how to speed things up.
还记得有一次我们说过能最大程度 Remember when we talked about how the best thing we could do
帮助家人的方法就是招募外人么 for the family is to recruit outside the family?
记得 我已经执行了 Yes. Way ahead of you.
夏茉 这位是Kendra Summer, I want you to meet Kendra.
她来自一家临时工中介 She's from a temp agency.
拥有一支随时待命的队伍 She's got an entire workforce ready to go,
而且所有人都有驾驶巨型机甲的经验 and all of them have previous giant robot pilot experience.
这样进度就可以加快了 So, we'll be ready to go ahead of schedule.
我也不是很确定这样 Well, I don't know about that but --
肯德拉很确定 那就 Well, Kendra knows. So...
那就 So....
你是来打断我的腿的吗 You here to break my legs?
我们是来说你老姐坏话的 No. We're here to talk shit about your sister,
她刚刚把我俩炒鱿鱼了 because she just fired us.
-说笑的吧 -膨胀的小贱畜 -You're kidding. -Arrogant little bitch.
我们要不要把她做掉 Should we clip her?
不了 不值得为她吃牢饭 No. She's not worth doing time.
你不会吃牢饭的呀 是你生的她 You wouldn't do time. You brought her into the world.
所以我就能杀了她吗 So, I can take her out.
你真以为有这么条法律啊 You thought there was an actual law?
那是妈妈们的玩笑话 It's a joke mothers say.
你都生活在什么操蛋世界里啊 What kind of fucked up world have you been living in?
不会把妈妈杀孩子当笑话讲的世界 好吗 Uh, one where your mother murdering you isn't a comedic premise?
爸妈 现在你们需要时间适应 Guys, there's a little adjustment period,
但很快都会回归正轨的 but pretty soon, you're gonna to return to normal,
你也不会想宰了夏茉 and you're not going to want to kill Summer.
连冲她发火都不会 You're not even gonna be mad at her.
拉倒吧 我要与她为敌 Nah, fuck her. She's my enemy.
要不要我们先自杀下地狱 Should we kill ourselves, so we can get to hell before her,
然后躲在大门口伏击 and hide near the entrance?
好主意 I like that.
瑞克把我炒了 Rick fired me.
-天哪宝贝 -对不起 -Oh, sweetie. -I'm sorry.
你还好吗宝贝 我们都怎么了 Are you okay, baby? What happened to us?
完全失去理智了 We lost our minds.
是的 莫蒂说得很对 I did it. Morty was right.
我哄外公开心上瘾了 I got addicted to making Grandpa happy.
因为你外公一直在鼓吹他开心的价值 It's only because your Grandpa inflates the value of his happiness.
说得好啊 不像我 That's a good point. I mean, look at me.
我可好哄了 所以 I'm easy to make happy, which is why
我开心了也没人在意 nobody gives a shit if I am.
谢谢大伙 还有另一件事 I appreciate it, but there's something else too.
我最近对家庭这个点特别敏感 I've been really sensitive about family lately
因为有件事我一直在跟你们保密 because of something I've been keeping secret.
好吧 谁继任最高大法官来着 Okay. Who's on the Supreme Court,
我们这是哪个州 and what state do we live in?
这事我好多年没想过了 It's been years since I've thought about this.
不是我怀孕了 No, I'm not pregnant.
但你们应该记得 毕竟总有人在我们耳边叨叨 But as you guys recall, and as a lot of people keep bringing up,
我和莫蒂意外造出了一个巨型乱伦婴儿 Morty and I did accidentally create a giant incest baby,
还被政府发射上了太空 which the government did launch into space.
但这事我真不知道该如何启齿 And I'm not sure how to tell you this,
那个巨婴还活着 我和他一直有接触 but it is still alive, and I have been in contact with it.
上个月有几个当兵的跑到学校找我 There were soldiers waiting for me outside school last month.
带我去了五角大楼 做了简报 They took me to the Pentagon, and briefed me.
然后我坐上了一架穿梭机去了火星上的一处秘密基地 And from there, I was shuttled to a secret base on Mars.
政府抓到了他 想看看 They had captured him, and wanted to see
会不会对我 他的母亲 做出本能的回应 if he'd respond to me, instinctively, being his mother.
他也确实有反应 And he sure did.
但他们没料到的是我的反应 But what they didn't expect was that I'd respond to him.
我是被叫去训诫他 I was supposed to help discipline him,
帮助政府把他培养成终极武器的 so they could turn him into the ultimate weapon.
然而我教他什么是爱 教他相信自己 Instead, I trained him to love, to believe in himself,
好有朝一日逃脱 and finally, to escape.
政府想掩盖这件事 The government doesn't want anyone to know it happened,
但真相大白是早晚的事 but it's only a matter of time before the story comes out.
若真有这么一天 我们就只能依靠彼此了 And when it does, all we're going to have is each other.
你们两个是爱人 瑞克可以依靠莫蒂 And you guys are a couple, and Rick has Morty,
我却只能打光棍 but I'm the odd one out.
所以我要想方设法让一家五口团结在一起 So, I wanted to make sure we stuck together.
但事与愿违 我让彼此渐行渐远 瑞克还找到一个 But instead, I drove us apart, and Rick replaced me
动画风妹子顶替我 现在我只剩下我自己 with an anime girl, so all I've got is myself
和我那巨大 被政府训练和折磨的 叛逃的 and my giant, tortured, government-trained rogue
飘在宇宙间某处的乱伦怪物婴儿可以依靠了 incest monster baby out there in space somewhere.
宝贝 苦了你了 Oh, baby. What the fuck.
这样一来 你也不禁好奇 And then, you have to wonder,
政府都拿着我们的税款搞了些什么鬼 what else are they doing with our taxes?
等下 夏茉 你说什么 Wait. Summer, what did you just say?
好多事 莫蒂 Morty, a lot.
他找了个动画风女孩顶替你 He replaced you with an anime girl?
大眼睛 牙缝是一排加号 Big eyes? Plus signs for teeth?
一句话说完还有奇奇怪怪的语气词 Ends sentences with weird sounds that don't fit?
没错 他的队伍现在全是这种人了 Yeah. That's going to be his whole crew now.
而且马上就要进行五五五创的第一次试驾 And they're about to run their first test on the GoGoGoTron.
那些人是来抢机甲的 Those people want to steal the robots.
瑞克孤立无援 他们会害死他的 Th-they're gonna kill Rick. He's all alone.
我我我们必须去救他 We-we-we've got to go save him.
对 或者 让他去死吧 Right. Or... you know, fuck him.
-我没意见 -没错 去死吧 -I'm good with that. -Yeah, fuck him.
家人们 一个伟大的领导者曾告诉我 Guys, a great leader once told me
摊上什么家人就是什么家人 you get the family you get.
好的 成功了 现在只需要找到个巨型怪兽 Alright. It works. Now, we just got to find a giant monster.
我的感应器搜索到了一只 瑞克 My sensors have picked one up, Rick.
好好好 锁定坐标 Okay. Okay Lock onto its location.
收到 Yeah, got it.
是你啊 Oh, it's you!
你们他妈要干嘛 What the hell is this?
谢谢你造出这个史上最大的机甲 瑞克 Thanks for making the biggest robot ever, Rick.
后边就交给我们吧 We'll take it from here.
你们这帮大屁眼子 You little assholes!
老不死的 You son of a bitch!
子弹上膛 各位 Lock 'n load, boys.
都来认识下小号的我 Say "hello" to my little me.
投降吧老东西 五三是我们的了 Give up, old man. The G3 is ours.
没记错的话 你的"家人们" And last I checked, your "family"
可不会来救你了 wasn't coming to save you, hmm?
仁慈圣母啊 Holy mother of mercy!
天呐 真壮观 My God. It's beautiful.
家人们来咯 Yeah! Family!
-那是 -你没看错 就是他 -Is that -- -It's exactly what it looks like. Yes.
恭喜啊老东西 长得真像你 Congrats, man. I see the resemblance.
组成光芒神剑 快他妈启动神剑 Form the Energy Sword! Activate the Goddamn sword!
天呐 拔剑了 咱们好像考虑得不太周到 Oh, man, the sword. Maybe we didn't think this through.
他们不会对太空婴儿下手的吧 They're not actually gonna attack a space baby, are they?
真想不到我会说出这种话来 I never thought I'd be the one to say this,
你得多看点动画片了老妈 but you need to watch more anime, Mom.
慢点 鸣人 Whoa, easy now, Naruto.
拜拜咯 Bahbah go bye-bye!
你们都是些什么妖魔鬼怪 What the hell is wrong with you people?!
随手就能掏出个乱伦太空怪兽吗 You just have an incest space monster in your back pocket, huh?
史密斯一家欢迎您 Welcome to the Smith family.
靠 鸣人快放手 你曾外祖父在里头 Shit. Put that down, Naruto. Your great-grandpa is in there.
玩最后一把吊索 如何 What do you say? One last zipline?
乱伦太空婴儿 干得漂亮 Incest space baby. Nicely done.
自那之后 一切基本都恢复如常 After that, things pretty much went back to normal --
某种程度上的正常吧 some version of it, anyway.
瑞克说五创不过是骗小孩的无聊把戏 Rick said GoTrons were lame little kid bullshit,
所以我们自此绝口不提 and we never talked about them again.
依旧有星际怪兽在各处为非作歹 Except all those gigantic space bugs were still runnin' loose,
但已经没有五创去和它们作战了 and there were no GoTrons left to fight them.
每天都会死伤上百万人 Yeah, millions die every day.
但你知道它们抹杀不了什么吗 But you want to know what they could never kill?
家庭 Family.
-杰瑞在哪 -救命啊 -Where's Jerry? -Help!
救命啊 我还在外头 Help! I'm still out here!
没有比这更重要的事了 Yep, nothing's more important than--
悠着点 Hey! Hey! Whoa-whoa-whoa!
就这样 我知道我们免不了 And just like that, I knew our goose was as cooked as --
死吧 旁白星人 Voiceovarians. Ugh.
♪ 壮观的景象 振奋的声响 ♪ ♪ Magic sights, exciting sounds ♪
♪ 无论日夜 都来看看 ♪ ♪ Come day or night, and feel around ♪
♪ 这是为你创造的世界 ♪ ♪ This is the world for you ♪
♪ 无论你去过哪里 ♪ ♪ No matter where you've ever been ♪
♪ 这都是你新生的起点 ♪ ♪ This is the place your life begiii-i-ins ♪
♪ 奶子世界 ♪ ♪ Boob World ♪
♪ 一个全新的世界 不对 是两个耶 ♪ ♪ It's a world for you, but it's actually two ♪
♪ 奶子世界 ♪ ♪ Boob Wo-o-orld ♪
Samansky 你迟到了 Samansky, you're late!
我不会再犯了 长官 Won't happen again, sir!
虫子们 看看你们的左边 然后看看你们的右边 Bugs, Look to your left. Now, look to your right.
你们不会再回来了 谁都不会 None of you are coming back. Not one.
本项目有史以来 In the entire history of this program,
没有一只虫子回来过 not a single bug has returned.
行了 大家聚过来 Alright. Bring it in!
- 我们是什么 - 正常大小的虫子 -What are we? -Normal-sized bugs!
- 我们要做什么 - 穿越跨维度入口抵达迷你人的星球 -What do we do? -Travel through an interdimensional gateway to a planet with tiny people!
- 我们为什么要这样做 - 传播艾滋病的治愈方法 -Why do we do it? -To spread the cure for AIDS!
中士 我们怎么知道那些小人能不能理解我们呢 Hey, Sarge, how do we know if these little people can understand us?
他们要是不说虫子语咋办 I mean, do these even speak Buganese?
真幽默 Palicki 这就是为什么我们要大声说 Funny, Palicki. That's why we say it very loud.
伙计们 过去之后你们仍然是文明的虫子 Guys, you'll still be the same civilized bug on their side.
跨维度穿越又不会 It's not like interdimensional travel
让我们的衣服消失 让我们像是大叫的怪物一样 strips us of our clothes, and makes us screaming monsters.
也或许会呢 没法知道 Or maybe it does. It's impossible to know.
快去吧 Now, get out of here!
我的衣服呢 怎么不见了 My clothes -- where'd they go?
啊 别打我了啊
行吧 听好了
一份柠檬汁
四片月桂叶
一撮海盐