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Hello, Alexander. It's Stuart. 哈啰，Alexander 这里是Stuart
Hello, Stuart. 哈啰，Stuart
You know, admitting I've had lots to drink and that, but I can't help reflect— 你知道吗？ 我和...我现在喝了很多酒...我无法阻止自己去回想...
I'm Alexander, the bloke in the glasses driving, 我是Alexander，戴着眼镜正开车的这个傢伙
not the mumbly one on the tape. That's Stuart. 磁带上颤抖着声音说话的是Stuart
I got to know Stuart in 2000 and decided to write his biography. 我在2000年结识Stuart并决定为他写传记
All my friends said it was mad. I mean, after all this man was unknown, 我所有的朋友都说这是个疯狂的主意
he wasn't famous, not a celebrity, but the book turned out okay. 毕竟这男人是无名小卒，并非什么大人物
结果书卖得还不错
Just wish Stuart could have been here to see it. 我只是希望Stuart能在这里跟我分享这些
本片由真实故事改编
I think it was the first ever biography of a homeless man. 我想这是第一本纪录一个游民的书 从他出生，一直到现在
From birth to the present day.
[Badly Drawn Boy - Pissing In The Wind]
英文听写：Wolfel 翻译：Drowning，Wolfel，夜夜清欢
校对：Sarsel，Wolfel 时间轴：awalanche（土耳其字幕）
《倒带人生》
剧本：Alexander Masters
由Alexander Masters出版之同名书籍改编
So, back in 2000 I was earning a bit of extra pocket money 在2000年，我为了挣点零花钱
working as a fundraiser at Wintercomfort, 在一间叫“冬憩”的收容所做资金筹集者
which is a busy little day shelter in Cambridge, normally full of homeless people. 那些日子繁忙， 剑桥这个小小的庇护所里常常挤满了无家可归的人
Full, that is, until the morning that the police decided to raid the place. ...通常挤得满满的，没错。
直到一天早上，员警决定对它进行突击检查
They've been arrested. -他们都被捕了 -所有人？真是个好主意。
All of them?
What a good idea.
Uh, no, no. It was, um, just my boss, Ruth, 不不，被逮捕的只有我老板Ruth， 还有，呃...她的副手John
and um, her deputy, John.
Some of the clients have been secretly dealing drugs on the premises 庇护所的一些救济对象在暗中进行毒品交易
but because Ruth and John ran the charity, they were held responsible. 但因为Ruth和John运行这个慈善机构
所以他们负首要责任
They've got evidence, on film. 他们有录影带呢，证据确凿
I was furious at the injustice of it. 我对这不公的事件感到愤怒
And, uh, then really, for the first time in my life 然后，在我生命里第一次，我，呃...真正开始...
I actually began to take a real and practical interest in the homeless.
Fuck off, pisshead! ...对无家可归的人产生了实际的兴趣 滚一边儿去，猪头
I'd like to introduce to you Alexander Masters, 我很高兴向你们介绍，Alexander Masters
a dedicated friend of the homeless himself, chairman of the campaign. 他不仅是游民最忠诚的朋友
也是这次抗争活动的主席
Oh, we were convinced they'd never be convicted. 哦，我们本来确信他们不会被立罪 （主持人：过一会儿后...）
I mean, if prisons can't control drugs then how could Ruth and John be expected to? 我是说，如果监狱都无法控制毒品蔓延
As everyone knows, we're here this evening about Ruth Wyner and John— Ruth和John又怎么可能做到
如各位所知， 我们今晚在这里是为了Ruth Wyner和John Brock
The judge, Justice Howarth, sent them down— —for five years, and four years. 但Howarth法官分别判了他们... （主持人：五年和四年徒刑）
- Shame. - Thank you. -这是一种羞辱 -非常感谢
- Fascist. - Thank you. -法西斯主义！ -谢谢，现在状况非常紧急
But this is the crunch, what are we going to do about it? 我们该怎么做？ 该怎么组织这次抗争才能把Ruth和John弄出来？
How is this campaign going to get Ruth and John out?
- Yes? - We could send them books. 请说
Bunyan, he's good for prisons. 我们可以给他们寄书，像是Bunyan，适合监狱里阅读 [John Bunyan（约翰·班扬）：17世纪英国作家，曾入狱]
Hardly. Miracle of the Rose, by Genet, if you must. 才不呢，如果一定要，还不如寄Genet的《玫瑰奇蹟》 [Jean Genet（让·热内）：20世纪法国作家]
Excuse me, this isn't gonna work. 这本书真是太他妈的能激励他们了 [《玫瑰奇蹟》中描写了监狱里的同性恋现象]
抱歉，这不会有用的
Sending them books, eh? It won't fit in the box. 给他们寄书，嗯？盒子装不下的
- Sorry? - The inmate's belongings. 抱歉？
监狱里的置物盒啊，每个犯人都有一只
Everyone's got one.
- Who is that? - No idea. They all look the same to me. 那是谁？
-不知道。我根本分不出他们的脸 -我之前住的地方
—you're also allowed a piece of carpet what won't fit in your box, 还允许你拥有...一块地毯
但是不，不，盒子还是装不下
and a budgie or, or a canary, 也可以带一只百吉鸟
或，或，或金丝雀
and obviously the cage is not going to fit in the box. 无论哪个都很明显，笼子根本放不进盒子里
But, it is Ruth and John what will suffer. 但是，Ruth和John将会因此被嘲笑
All of them books, the screws will just chuck them out because they won't fit in your box. 寄给他们那些书，狱卒会把它们都丢掉
因为根本就装不进盒子里！ 我不是要开玩笑
I'm not being funny, but you should really know about boxes if you're gonna have a campaign.
但如果你们在组织抗争运动，至少要先对盒子有点了解
Me name's Psycho, but you can call me Stuart, if you like. 我是个疯子，不过你可以叫我Stuart，如果你想的话
- Um, what's your address? - Umm... 2 Laurel Lane. 呃，你的地址？
月桂街，2号 [月桂街2号是一个大公园]
Yeah, they help me: doctors, a couple clothes, outreach, sometimes lunch with two puddings. 是的，他们帮助过我
给我找医生，提供我衣服， 食物，有时的午饭还有两份布丁
Yeah, they put it all on, those two. And the staff. 是的，他们把它也放在餐盘里，还有那些好工作人员
I'm not being funny, yeah, but I am really grateful. 不是开玩笑，但我真的很感激他们
- The other day I got a really [indiscernible]. - Oh, great. -前几天我还享受了一次非常美好的头顶按摩 -哦太好了 -是的
- Can I help? - Yeah, uh, yeah. -我帮得上忙吗？ -呃，是的
That's how I first met Stuart Shorter. 这就是我怎么结识Stuart Shorter， 街头游荡者，酒鬼
Street brawler, alcoholic, a heroin addict, sociopathic street raconteur with a fondness 瘾君子，反社会份子，街头吟游者
for what he called "little strips of silver". Knives, to you and me. 总是佩带着他锺爱的“小银条” 喔，在你我看来那就是一把刀
- Thank you very much for agreeing to store these. - Oh, no problem. 非常感谢你帮我搬运这些资料
哦，不，没什么
Mind the step. Oh, dear. Here you go, mate. 小心脚下
Welcome to my humble abode. 好了，老兄。欢迎光临寒舍。 月桂街2号。咋了，它们是月桂树吧，对不对？
2 Laurel Lane. Well, they are laurels, aren't they?
I only heard about the meeting this morning when I was picking up my breakfast. 我今天吃早饭的时候才听说你们这次的聚会
- Your address? - Mm-hm. -你的地址？ -嗯
A bad idea, number one, mate. You could get any old riff-raff showing up. Oh, dear, dear. 写在第一个不是什么好主意
所有的人都会拿丁点破事去烦你
Yes? 诶？ ...Stu.
It's you.
I've addressed some envelopes. 我填好了一些信封
- Which, uh... - They alright? 什么的？
Horrible. 都是些大人物嘛
I've had a blinding idea for the campaign. Yeah, get us on television and all. 关於抗争活动我有个点子，就是， 把我们弄上电视什么的
Not even violent, if we leave out the kidnapping. 也可以来点暴力手段
像是绑架他们...之类的
- Do you want to come in? - Oh, yes please. 你要进来吗？
It's a bit wet out there. 哦是的，请让我进去，外面有点潮湿 哇哦，这真棒
Ooh, that's nice.
- How many sugars? - As many as you got, mate. 加多少糖？
有多少加多少，老兄
H—hot. 烫...烫
All them books. 所有的书，你都读过了？
Have you read all of them?
No. 没有
Half? 一半呢？
Not exactly. 也没有吧
The Hunting Wasp. 《捕猎的胡蜂》
A whole book about them little summer things. 整本书都在讲那种夏天出现的小生物吗
This one. What is this one about? 这个，是关於什么的 (书名：Mauve)
The colour mauve. 就讲那个颜色，淡紫色
How do you fucking get away with this? 这他妈要怎么讲
Now, this blinding idea. -现在...关於我那个点子... -你有车吗？
Have you got a car?
No. 没有
What do you like better: Volvo or VW? 你比较喜欢哪种车，福特还是大众？
And then a few weeks later I had the idea about the book and started doing a little research. 几周后，我有了写这本书的想法…
然后开始做些小调查
That boy has suffered. He deserves a book. 那个男孩儿受了很多苦
（Stuart的奶奶）
You should write a book about me. 他值得你给他写本书... 你也该写本关於我的书
Always such a caring boy. 总是那么体贴，无忧无虑的小东西
Happy-go-lucky little thing. （Stuart的母亲，Judith）
Legs all over the show, bless him. 我乐意分享那些，但看起来
Three months after that we carried out Stuart's blinding idea 三个月后，我们实施了Stuart提出的主意
which was a sleep-over protest in front of the home office 在内政部门前过夜抗议
to persuade the then Home Secretary, Jack Straw, to release Ruth and John. 借此来向内政大臣Straw陈情， 请他释放Ruth和John
Which was better than his first idea, which was to kidnap him. 这比他上个主意要好多了
他本来打算绑架内政大臣
Stuart took care of our transport. Somehow. 不知何故，负责开车的是Stuart
And on the way to London I read him the first few pages of my book idea. 在去伦敦的路上 我给他念了些我写的部份
"Stuart Clive Shorter was a happy-go-lucky little boy, 'the most considerate of my children', marvels his mother." “Stuart Clive Shorter是个无忧无虑的小男孩儿”
-噢~ -“是个最体贴的孩子——他的母亲低语道”
Bollocks! Boring! 狗屎！无聊！
Why do you want to write this fucking book anyway? 你到底想要写这该死的书干什么？
To make lots and lots and lots of money. 挣很多很多很多的钱
Seriously? You think you can make money out of it? 真的？你认为你能从这里赚到钱？
Could, maybe. 可能，也许
Something as boring as that? 听着挺无聊，不是吗
Don't be so rude. Anyway, it's not my fault that you started out so dull. 别这么粗鲁，你的人生一开始这么无趣又不是我的错
喔~啊~
You got make it more exciting. 你要把它弄的更激情些
Do it backwards. Like a murder mystery. Like a best-seller. 倒着写它吧
像一个神秘的谋杀案，像一本畅销书那样
You know, like what Tom Clancy writes. 像Tom Clancy那么写，没错 [Tom Clancy（汤姆·克兰西），20世纪美国作家，常写冷战谍报题材]
Yeah! How'd I get to be like this? 我是怎么变成这样的？
What murdered the little boy I was? 是什么杀害了当初的我
Make them nine-to-five sit up. 就像从9数到5那样倒着来
I mean, you put ten socks in the washing machine and only seven come out. 我是说，你丢10双袜子进洗衣机结果最后只剩7双
Where do they go? -它们去了哪里 -Stuart
- Stuart? - I'll tell you another thing and all— -我告诉你这真的很神奇 -Stuart
- Stuart? — You take the machine apart and it ain't in it neither. -我敢打赌就算你拆开机器，它们还是不在那儿 -Stuart！
- Stuart? - What? -怎么了？ -这是什么？
- What's this? - What? - This.
-什么？ -这个
That, Alexander, is a lice. 哦，哦，那个，Alexander
是个蝨子
The main place you get those is around your bollocks. 那东西会出现在有毛的地方，很容易沾上
That lice, that'll grow. 蝨子啊，那东西无论公母都能生蛋
Scabies are smaller and they go under the skin and live there, literally nibbling. 但疥虫就不同啦，他们更小
会从伤口钻进你皮肤里，住在那儿，还扎根呢
真有趣
It took five and a half hours for our convoy to do the 50 miles from Cambridge to London. 我们用了5个半小时行驶50英哩，从剑桥到伦敦
Stuart从没超过30英哩的时速
Stuart would never drive above 30 miles an hour.
Hey, Buckingham Palace. 嘿~ 白金汉宫耶 [箭头：瓦瑟斯多市政厅]
What a load of bollocks! Huh! （乱叫一气）
Who needs a queen? 我们才不需要女王呢
-好的，我暸解了 -去那边
- Oh, no, no, no, no. No, not like that. - What? 不，不不，不像这样
Use this, right? Underneath, yeah? Here you are. 什么？
-这样，对，这在下面 -对，哦
You lose more heat that way than you do that way. 这样睡起来更温暖啦
Ruth and John need these: eyes on the back of their heads! Ruth和John需要这些，长在脑后的眼睛！
End [indiscernible] police state now! 才能发现恶警埋伏
Ruth和John需要这些，长在脑后的眼睛！
People are being wrongfully imprisoned for working in a charity （记者：两人被无故关押）
and doing nothing but trying to help the homeless. 他们除了帮助这些无家可归的人外
什么坏事也没做
Charity workers in prison because of a miscarriage of— oh, fuck off. 慈善人员被关押，因为他们的善意……哦滚吧
这是不公正的
看在上帝的份上
Charity workers in prison because of a miscarriage of justice. 慈善人员坐监狱 这是司法不公
Okay, listen up, everyone! 好了，听着所有人 所有人都听着！
Okay, everyone! Listen up! Everyone, please. Quiet, please!
所有人！请安静！
Everyone, we need you to move this way, thank you. 我们需要你们所有人向这边移动，谢谢
Wait a minute, hold on, hold on. Why? This is a peaceful protest. 等等。为什么？这是个和平的抗议
Yeah! Fucking why? 是啊，为什么？
You can't cross these brass flags if the Home Office doesn't want you to. 你们不能在没有授权的情况下佔领这区域
That's social fucking fascism, that is! 你这是该死的纳粹主义！
And then we must put a fence in behind you to ensure you're not trespassing 我们必须把你们围在栅栏后面以确保你们不会越过这区
and ones on either side to protect you. - What? 两边还要各放一个栅栏保护你们
啥？
From the public, sir. They might step on you. And a fence in front just in case 从公众的角度，先生
路人可能踩到你们
during the night you roll onto the road and get run over. 为了确保你们晚上不会滚到马路上，前面也要放一个
Oh, I see. So you mean to cage us in completely. 我明白了，所以你的意思就是个没锁没顶的笼子
I didn't say cage, sir, no. That was your word.
我没有说是个笼子，先生，那是你的用词
Do prisoners really get wages? -囚犯真的有薪水拿吗？ -有啊
Yeah.
You mean a lot like normal people? 但是，他们不像平常的人拿的那样吧？
Yeah, make a fucking fortune. 是吧，但他们真有钱拿， 有些出来后成了百万富翁，坐拥财富
Millionaires coming out of the nick every week.
You've been in a lot of prisons then? -所以你坐过很多牢 -我吗？可他妈多了
Have I? Fucking hell.
How many? -多少次？ -嗯......
Well, um...
Well, start off, when I was a nipper there was Send Detention Centre, 首先，当我还小的时候，那儿有个少年管教所
放手！放下那铁栏杆！
Baintnow House, back to Send again, 回家，然后又被送去
Eriestoke, Norwich, 接着是... Elstoke ... Norwich，都是类似地方
then I grew up and went to big boy prison. 然后我长大了，到了可以进监狱的年龄
Whitemoor. Aw, now that's what I call a real prison. Whitemoor。这是个真正的监狱
You got everything there, mate: 那里有所有类型的犯罪者，哥们。恐怖主义者，精神病
terrorists, psychopaths, security threats, murderers, manslaughters, crazies...
恐吓犯，谋杀犯，过失杀人犯，疯子
Which lot do you belong to? 你是哪一种？
Crazies, really. Mm, yeah. 疯子，是的，没错，我是疯狂的那种
Norwich, Whitemoor again. Norwich，接着又是 Whitemoor
Grendon Underground. 该死的混蛋！
Grendon Underwoods
去死吧，恋童癖
Thirty-one. 31次吧， 我应该没有漏掉吧？
I don't think I've missed any.
Oh yes, I have actually! I've been to Leicester three times as well. 哦，对了，我漏掉了Leicester，我去了那三次
Wayland was me last one. 上次是去Wayland
Good night. Sleep well. 晚安，好梦
Thank you. Same to you. 谢谢，你也是
Oi, you. Since you got so much fucking time on your hands, yeah, 嘿，你，既然你吃撑了没事干儿
answer this one: do you know how many people 回答我个问题，你知道监狱里有多少人死在狱卒手里吗
get killed by screws in prison every year? Murders.
Oh, sorry, Gov. Excuse us, how was we supposed to know that bending him in half 每年都他妈的有，这是谋杀啊！ “抱歉啊，守卫，但我们怎么知道...”
the wrong fucking way was bad for his health? “...用错误的姿势去折他的身体对他的健康不好呢？”
It was only people like me what is really rotten, isn't it? Really bad. 那些人对我们来说根本就没有好的影响 只会让我们越来越糟，越来越烂！
Beyond hope. You haven't got the faintest fucking clue, have you? Huh? 直到再也无药可救 你们一点也不明白对不对？嗯？
- Yeah, all he said was "Good night". - You can fuck off and all you fucking geeky— 他只是来说声晚安
你可以去死了，你们所有人，都去死
- Oh, shut up yourself, Stuart. - You fucking wanking middle class cunt fuck, Alexander. 你为什么不闭嘴呢，停下来吧，Stuart
你这该死的中产阶级骗子
You want to know how I became what I am? I'm giving you fucking answers! Alexander！你不是想知道我是怎么变成这样的吗？
我这就他妈的在给你答案哪
Why don't you write a book with no fucking answers, eh? 你为什么要写一本没有答案的书？是不是？哈？
Go on, you fuck off. You find your fucking answers. 好吧，你去死吧。自己去找你见鬼的答案。
On a scale of anger, one to ten, I'm probably on four and Stuart's on eleven. 假设用1到10来评断怒气 [Stuart的妹妹]
我大概在4级吧
而Stuart则是11级
You never can tell... 这从来没个了结 [Stuart的爷爷]
how families have been down and they've been up then they've been down again. 他们家是怎样没落又攀升，接着继续没落然后...
You just like Stuart, you know? …就，就像Stuart的状况那样起起伏伏，你理解吧？
Drugs, prison, being a beggar. 滥用毒品、进监狱、当个强盗...
Go on, go on. 嘿，嘿 [狗是Tom Hardy的爱犬Max]
Yeah, mate. 好，老兄
- Bastards! - Morning. -混蛋！ -早上好
Like the taste of piss, eh? 尝到塑胶啦？
You bastards. 你们这些混蛋
Someone smells nice. 你闻起来不错啊
After three months of preparation. 在经过三个月的准备后
I mean, who's bloody stupid idea was it that we camp out over the weekend anyway, 到底是谁的“天才”主意要在周末来进行抗争活动的
the one time Mr. Straw's not going to be there? 这根本是Straw先生唯一不会出现的时候， 我敢打赌是你的主意
- I bet it was yours. - Oh, fuck off. 去你的！
- Oh, I like this song. - This is a good song. -哦我喜欢这歌 -是首好歌
Because you're gorgeous~ I'd do anything for you~ [Baby Bird - You're Gorgeous]
Still, one blimey thing did come out of that weekend: 那个周末确实有件值回票价的事情发生
Stuart's idea that his life should be written backwards. 就是Stuart觉得他的生活应该倒过来写
It was cutting me throat what done it. 我意识到时它已切在我的喉咙上了， 一个碎啤酒杯插在我脖子上
Put a beer glass into me neck. Just lost it.
就只是一瞬间的念头
Sometimes you wouldn't believe how hard it is to fucking die. 有时你简直不相信死起来有多难
So, you got a council for that, because you tried to kill yourself? 所以你因为尝试自杀而获得一间政府提供的公寓？
Works a trick for the old housing points, doesn't it? 这可是为了拿到房子的花招呢
Whoosh! Straight to the top of the list. 自杀，接着一口气排到等候名单的最前端去
It's not all gone though. 它们并不是都离开了
What's not all gone? 什么没有都离开？
The hatred. 恨意哪，老兄，我有那么多敌人在这里
I got so many enemies. Up here, mate.
Somebody's going to get hurt though, that's what scares me. 有人会被它们伤到，而这让我害怕
When's this thing going to happen? 它什么时候会去闹事？
I call it me "black mists". 我叫它，我的黑色迷雾
Next week? Next month? Next ten seconds? 下周？下个月？还是10秒后？
哦~你是个可爱的小东西，不是吗
That is lovely bit of workmanship.
哇哦~这很有趣，很有趣
That's value. That's value.
Oh my God. This for the series. 哦，老天，是的，在这儿
For my son. 为我儿子买的
You've got a son!? 你有个儿子？！
Yeah. In Glasgow with his mum. 是啊，他跟他妈妈住在Glasgow，明天是他14岁的生日
Fourteen years of age to mind.
Always out on the golf course, the little 'un. 他总喜欢往高尔夫球场跑
Not bad there, mate. Not better than Laurel Lane. 不错是不是，老兄？跟月桂街2号比起来算不错的
Wine always smells like sick. 噁~红酒的味儿总像已经坏掉了 这儿，还是喝杯啤酒吧
Here, have a beer.
Fancy something to eat? 你想吃什么？
瞧
So why do you want to be a writer, then? 你为什么想当个作家
Oh, I don't know, really. Bit like a disease, all my family's got it. 我不知道，就像种遗传病吧，我整个家族都写作
Didn't want to be left out, did I? 我可不想被排除在外，对吧？
Nah. I know what you mean, mate. 我不知道你指什么，老兄
Me dad is a thief, 我老爸是个贼，我妈妈是酒吧服务员
and, um, me mum's a barmaid.
What's the colour orange highlighter in your diary for? 你日记里用橙色划出的部分是关於什么的？
Family stuff. 家庭相关
Yellow? 那黄色呢？
Social. 社交生活啊
Now, uh, this book that you're writing about me, 那个啥，这本书，关於我的
最后只会署你的名吗？
is it just to make your name?
And yours. 当然还有你的
I've, uh, had an idea for a job, too.
我有一个很棒的点子，关於工作方面的
嗯？
For the foreign businessman what doesn't have time to waste, 假设有个没时间可以浪费的外国生意人 他需要什么？
what does he need?
An office... in a van. 一间设在货车里的办公室
It's lateral thinking, isn't it? 很跳脱思考对吧？ 想想看，他在Stansted下飞机
Gets off the plane at Stansted, straight into the back of me van.
直接走到我的货车后面，就什么都有了
That will have everything:
good-looking bird what can do shorthand, 好看的小妞儿，可以做速记，还有传真，上网，
fax, internet, wires all over the fucking gaff. It's brilliant.
整辆车接满电缆，棒极了
Red sauce or brown? 蕃茄酱还是黑椒汁？
Oh, yes please. I mean, uh, red. 呃，是的，谢谢，我是说，蕃茄酱
- What—What's— - Oh yeah, that fella upstairs 什么？是的，哦是的，楼上那傢伙 说要帮我做张可以摺叠起来靠着墙的床
is gonna make me a bed what folds up against the wall, like what James Bond has.
就像007有的那种
- Ooh. - Yeah. It's got to have, um, 然后，用弹簧锁锁在地板上
springs and latches on the floor otherwise it's boing, boing, whoosh!
不然，它会"碰碰咻"
Boing, boing, whoosh? "碰碰咻"？
You know what I mean, bird's not going to be too happy if she gets her face
你知道的，小妞儿可不会喜欢搞到一半
squeezed up against the plaster, is she? 发现自己脸砸到泥墙上了
Hey.
Sorry. 抱歉啊...
Good stuff, that. You can use it with anything. 那是个好东西，在什么东西上都可以用
See that right by the bed? This should be a huge stain where I overdosed there last week. 看到床周围了吗，这儿应该有一大块污渍
我上周嗑太多药，吐得一塌糊涂
And all the spilled cans and vomit. That cleaned it up really, really well, actually.
用它清过之后非常非常乾净，对吧
But you want to, um, you want to leave it, uh, for about... about a week before you vacuum. 但你必须挤好了之后不理它...大概一周
在你把它擦掉之前要放一周
Here you are, mate. 给，老兄
Careful, yeah? It's a bit hot. 当心，有点热
I never asked you why you were in prison. 我从没问你是怎么进的监狱
The last time— Stupid things. 上一次，是些愚蠢的事情
Me mate, Smithy, well bubblegum chap, 我的好友，Smithy，世界泡泡糖冠军
I'm not being funny, he's in the Guinness Book of Records. 不是说笑的， 在Guinness Book Records里有记录，1983版的
1983 edition, as it goes.
Like brothers fighting the world. 我们就像手足一样，对抗整个世界
Respect, trust, and honour. 尊重，信任以及荣誉
Go, go, go, go, go! 快快快
Right. 好的
Ow.
- Oh, fuck. Did you get menthols? - Menthols? Fuck off. 啊见鬼！你有拿薄荷菸吗？
薄荷菸？我他妈没拿
- She'll fucking kill me. She asked for menthols. - Well, give her the vodka. 她会杀了我的，她要我弄到薄荷菸！
不然就给她伏特加嘛
She don't want vodka, she wants menthols! 她不想要伏特加，她想要薄荷菸
Go, go, go, go, go! 快快快
Aw, I don't believe it! These aren't fucking menthols either! 我简直不敢相信，这些不是什么薄荷菸啊
They're just in a green packet. I've got ten packets of green cigarettes. 这只有包装是绿的！我弄了10包绿盒子菸
Hurry up. 快点儿
25 quid, 60!? 25镑又60？
Women! They think they can boss you about in everything, don't they? 女人啊！她们认为可以指使你做任何事！
And one day, Smithy got a tip-off. 然后有一天
Smithy得到线报
- 20,000 quid? - Just keeps it under the counter. 20,000镑？
Not a cop shop in 20 miles. 就藏在柜台下头呢
20英哩之内没有条子巡逻
Fucking— That's fucking irresponsible. 我操，是谁负责这片儿
No pride of ownership. 反正不是我们
嗯
Go, go, go, go, go! 快快快
Right.
Let's just say it was funny because as soon as we was sent down, 这么说吧，这很滑稽，因为我们一被抓走 Smithy的女朋友就搬去跟
Smithy's missus moved in with the fella what told us about the job. 那个给我们线报的人一起住了
Five years. [吹泡泡糖世界冠军被判刑]
五年
Pretty steep sentence. Were you armed? 判的不轻耶，你们有带武器吗
No. 没有
Only with a crowbar. ...只有一只撬棍
有什么进展?
Don Sullivan 昨晚把他的牙刷和其他东西
放进我的浴室了
Hey, Alexander? You wanna stay for tea? 你是说他住在浴室？
-嘿, Alexander. 只住一晚
想吃茶点吗
Me favourite, "convict curry". 我最爱的一种点心，咖哩“犯” [咖哩“犯”（Convict Curry）：直译为囚犯咖喱，取其谐音]
We used to make it in jail. 我们之前在监狱常弄
Ooh, mushrooms! 喔，蘑菇！
- What about the first time, then? - First time what? -第一次是怎么回事？ -什么第一次？
Well, that you were sentenced as an adult. 你第一次以成年人的身分被判刑
I can't— I can't really talk about that, mate. 我不能... 我真的不能谈这个，老兄
But, I mean, robbing an empty post office is— 但，我是说... 抢劫一间无人的邮局，这是...
Burgle. Rob people, burgle post offices. 偷窃， 对人才是用抢的，邮局那算是偷
Yeah, but what I mean is it's hardly a Schedule 1 offence, is it? 我知道那不同，但我想说的是，第一次被关对你来说
Of course not. 应该最印象深刻吧？
并没有。
Well, that's serious, isn't it? 呃，这挺不寻常的，不是吗？
It wasn't kiddie fiddling. 那并不是轻松有趣的事儿
I didn't say that it was. 我没有那么说
It wasn't. 那真的...
We'll talk about it Thursday, yeah? 我们星期四再谈这个好吗？
Thursday afternoon. 星期四下午。
Another time, right? 没有更适合的时间了，对吧？
[电视里正在播放考古学节目]
[与罗马地区镶嵌於地板上的马赛克画作相关]
[提到了古代人创作的构思]
[以及整幅拼贴的结构]
[解说员在解释着图案的含义]
Then you mop with the bread. Mop up your juices. 用吐司，把热腾腾的酱汁吸起来
So, smash the window, break the steering wheel lock 所以说，我只需要砸破车窗
by turning the wheel in opposing directions. 然后左右转动方向盘来破坏它的锁头
Yeah. And if the street is too public to use a brick... 没错。如果街上人太多，不能用砖块砸的话？
Slide stick. Remove the metal band from a pallet of bricks, reduce to eighteen inches, 那就用一根细铁丝
从窗户的缝隙伸进去，勾住车锁，拉起来
remove a notch from one side, insert into door panel. 接着开那车靠近门边
Ba-kow! I'm in the post office! Boot in the rubble! 砰，我人在邮局里了 脚踏一堆碎玻璃
No, there's no point in ram-raiding a post office. 不，不，没道理去抢劫一间邮局
- Why not? - Can't you not pay attention? 为什么不？
There's no point in ram-raiding a fucking post office. There's never no money in the till, is there? 你都没听我说话嘛 去抢邮局一点用也没有
他们的抽屉里根本没多少现金，对吧 也没有别的好抢
Gone are them days.
I forgot money. 我忘了带钱了。
Here. 这儿，拿去用吧
No, no, no, no. I'll get a taxi, I'll stop at a bank on the way. 不，不，这样不好。
No, honestly, take it. It's me beer money. 我会叫计程车，让他顺路停银行取钱。
不，我说真的，拿着吧
You'll be doing me a favour. 你拿走这钱，就是帮我戒酒
You'll be doing society a favour. 也算是帮了社会
And buy a fucking car. -你真该快点去买辆他妈的车 -你才该快去搞张他妈的牌照
Get yourself a fucking license.
Oh, I almost forgot. 喔，我差点忘了。 呐，我带了这要给你
Here. Bought you this.
Your black mists. 这要干啥?
你说的那个“黑色迷雾”
Thought you could talk into it next time you're in one. 下次你感到他要出现时，可以试着录音看看
You'll be okay? 哇塞，你真夸张
Call if you need any help. 你会没事吧？
如果你需要任何帮助，打给我。
2am, 4am, anytime. 不管是凌晨两点，或四点，任何时候都可以。
Yeah, so you can bring a fucking camera? -最好是，然后你就可以带着见鬼的照相机来拍照 -哈
Oi! 喂！
You're alright, Alexander. 你是对的，Alexander。
Often used to say to Stuart, "I wish I could just pick you up sometimes, 通常来说，那只不过是Stuart平常的样子。
turn you upside down and shake all the bad things out of your head, 有时，我只希望能把他抓起来上下摇晃
then put you back up the right way again." 把那些坏东西都甩出来，再把他好好拼回正常的样子。
The change in him. 他转变得那么突然
We just couldn't understand it. 我们真的无法理解怎么回事
And of course I would like to thank you all for coming here today 我非常感谢你们今天的参予
to hear me talk about the campaign and the petition. 来听我解释这场抗争以及请愿的内容
Stuart and I gave nine or ten talks together about the campaign that spring 那年春天，Stuart和我一起在伯明罕、伦敦、牛津...
in Burmingham, London, Oxford, and of course villages around Cambridge. 当然还有剑桥附近的乡间，替抗争做了九或十场演说
Mr Stuart Clive Shorter. 这位是Stuart Shorter 我会先解释状况，然后Stuart会接过麦克风
I'd speak first, and then Stuart would get up and knock the audience off its
seats with the story of his life. 用他一生的故事震撼坐在场下的听众们
A typical suicide attempt, just an unbearable sense of hatred, waste— 自杀倾向在我们之间是常有的事 感受那些那种难以承受的愤恨，与自觉对生命的浪费
"I am the nightmare you frighten your children with", he said. 他说：我是你们用来恐吓孩子的恶魔与梦靥 那些社工人员正努力尝试着
"The sort of person these two charity workers were trying to help to get off your streets."
要从大街上带走的那类人
"We should have awarded Ruth and John medals instead of sending them to prison." 我们根本不该把Ruth与John关进监牢， 应该要发奖章表扬他们的所作所为才对
—so I just twisted around and I emptied everything that remained into my right buttock. 接着我转过身，清空我右边口袋里的所有东西。
Stuart did two things for the campaign, really. Stuart真正替这场抗争做的事情有两件
He folded letters 他寄出很多请愿信 并让许多人窥见他的灵魂
and he exposed his soul.
That alright? 结束了吗？
- Exactly. So, if we write— - Oh, this is your name. 正是如此，所以你必须重写... 等等，这上面标着着你的名字
If we solve the puzzle, do we solve you? 这是表示假设我们解决了这道难题也就解决了你吗？
He's just... He's just very, very interesting, you know? 这只是...这整件事真的非常有意思，你了解吗？ 他向我展示了我先前无从知晓的世界
He tells me about a world I knew nothing about
and... I... I just like him. ...而且我...我只是...对他很有好感
It's absolutely extraordinary. He knows the exact day that he changed into a sociopath. 这无庸置疑地是种令人佩服的能力
他...他能够准确地说出自己是在哪天开始精神失常的
Between 4pm and 5pm. The exact day! 就在那一天的下午四到五点间
It's like knowing what was in Dr Jekyll's potion that turned him into Mr Hyde. 这就好像能确实列出
将Jekyll博士转变成怪物Hyde的药剂的成分一样不可思议
This thing, Stuart's black mist, came that night. Stuart称之为“黑色迷雾”的这东西闹事是某一晚
Apparently it started by a knife fight. 显然地是起始於一场用上刀子的打斗
The first I heard about it was a call a day later from his mother. 我第一次听见这消息是隔天Stuart的母亲打电话给我的时候
At least there's no blood. 至少这儿没有血迹。
Usually there is blood. 通常他住的地方总会有血迹留着
Perhaps the cleaners have been 'round. 或许清洁工来处理过了...
Just for the blood. 就只针对那些血迹
Campaign's helped him a lot, you know. 其实抗争运动对他来说有正面影响
Kept him straight. 让他保持正常、清楚，并有目标
Ain't been this happy since he was a little boy. 自从他改变后， 我就再也没见过他像这几个月这么快乐了
[只给Alexander]
"Alexander only."
Hello, Alexander. It's Stuart. You know, admitting I've had lots to drink and that, but 哈啰，Alexander，这是 Stuart
你知道吗？我和...我现在喝了很多酒... 我无法阻止自己去回想...
I can't help reflect about—
Stuart had been bailed to appear at Cambridge Magistrate's Court. Stuart被获准交保，去剑桥地方法院受审
I went with him for moral support. 出於道义上的支持，我陪他去听审
They don't look too upset to be here. 她们被送到这似乎不怎么难过
Well, wait till they get to Crown Court, that's when it gets serious. 这儿就这样，等你到了刑事法庭，气氛才会凝重点
Godspeed the day. 了解了
Excuse me, you're about to fall off— 不好意思，你快要滑到地上了
Fuck off. 少管我
Good lad, just say that to the nasty man with the wig and 太好了，我不过是希望你不要把自己搞髒
everything will be fine. 没想过那对你来说搞不好很有趣
Sometimes it takes so long you forget what your fucking crime was. 有时候太久没人接电话 会他妈的让你忘了自己到底打过去要讲什么
Here, listen to this. It's the little 'un. 来，听听这留言，这是我家小子
If I don't know you, fuck off! I'm not in and I don't wanna talk to you! 我不管你是哪位，滚蛋
我不在家，也他妈的一点都不想跟你说话
I didn't think it was like that. 你怎么会觉得这好笑？
I was thinking maybe he should go to business school. 我总是希望他以后能去读个商学院或经济
But now I don't know.
He ain't right. 现在这样怎么能行？
我得要教导他恰当的礼仪该有多重要
I've had to have words with him about the importance of politeness.
He's fourteen. 他才14岁
It really shocked me, to be honest. 我知道，而他的不成熟真让我感到惊讶
Mr Shorter? Shorter先生吗？
According to police statements they could smell smoking oil when they arrived on the scene. 警方的笔录上面写着，他们到达现场时闻到了
难闻的油烟味
Chip fat. 那是炸薯片的油
It was the anniversary of my brother's death. 那是我老哥死掉的纪念日
I wanted to burn the devil out of myself. 我想用火把我体内的恶魔赶出来
The Magistrate's Court decided they couldn't handle the complexities of Stuart's case 地方法院最后决定
Stuart的案件太複杂了以至於他们无法处理
so they referred it to the Crown Court. 因此他们将案子移转到刑事法庭去
Disgrace. Forty policemen and you still get bailed? 这太有趣了。 惊动了40个警察去阻止你，法官依然让你保释。
Beats me why you hate the system. 告诉我你怎么还能对这个体制有任何不满？
Well, my mum says she doesn't understand it neither. 我老妈说她也搞不懂这事儿
What did the barrister mean when he was talking about "attempted manslaughter"? 那个庭审律师说到你意图杀人，那是怎么回事儿？
I reckon I tried to cut my neighbour's head off with a bread knife. 那是因为我试图用一把面包刀把我邻居的头砍下来
You didn't. Did you? -你没这么做，对吧？ -我没有
Yeah.
And if he hadn't have moved, I'd have got him too. 如果不是因为他躲开了，我会砍下去的
So you called your neighbour who made your boing-boing-whoosh bed 你是不是冲那个说要帮你做“砰砰咻”床的邻居喊他是基佬
a poofter and then that's why he lost it?
才让他发火失去控制？
No, he thought that I called him a poofter. 不，他认为我有喊他基佬
- And you did nothing of the sort? - No. -但你根本就没干这事儿。 -绝对没有
Then what did you do? 不然你干了啥？
I just asked his friend if he was a poofter. 我只是问了他的朋友他是不是个基佬
It's not a joke, Alexander! 这不是个笑话，Alexander
- Well, I mean— - When my bell's up, I'm looking at life! 怎么？我只是...
这事关我的人生，多点尊重好吗？
I've lost my keys somewhere. 我搞丢钥匙了
So you didn't call your neighbour who made your boing-boing-whoosh bed a poofter. 所以，你没有叫帮你做"砰砰咻"床的邻居基佬
But what— What did his mate say when you called... 好吧，那他的朋友怎么说，当你叫...
What did his mate say when you asked him if he was a poofter? ...当你问他你邻居是不是基佬的时候他怎么说
Just... said he suffered from premature ejaculation. 他说：不，不，他只是对於早泄感到非常困扰
Which I thought was quite interesting at the time 那时我还觉得挺有趣的
because I suffer from the same complaint myself. 因为我也有相同的困扰
Um, I'm going to see some friends in Norfolk next week. 嗯...我下礼拜要去诺弗克看几个朋友
Come along. 一起来不？
No, can't. 不了，我不能去，你也听到法官的指示了
You heard the Magistrate, I'm not allowed out of Cambridge until me trial.
在候审中不准离开剑桥
And another thing about washing machines, right, -我还听说过一个关於洗衣机的故事 -啥？
this fella on the TV, 电视上某个傢伙说的
he put three of them washing machine inner bits together. 他把三个洗衣槽黏在个砖块上， 就这样，再没其他装饰了
Not even a concrete one. Nothing.
And he said it was a sculpture. 然后把那东西称为艺术品
And somebody bought it! 见鬼！然后还有人真的买了！
I'm not being funny, yeah? 不是说笑的，这里面显然有很大的利益可图
But there is a viable business opportunity there.
Rent a barn. 租个货仓，卖二手洗衣机什么的
Lay out all the bits.
And when you've had enough of washing machines, 当我没有足够的旧洗衣机了，我还可以改卖...呃...冰箱
do fridges.
You know, that's what really annoys me, Alexander. Alexander，你知道真正让我感到不爽的是啥吗？
I'm always getting these great ideas, you know, about how to make money. 我一直有些很棒的主意，你知道，该怎么赚钱之类的
People are always telling me that they're wrong, you know? 但人们总是告诉我那行不通，硬是不让我搞
I never get no encouragement. 他们从没给过一点儿鼓励，从不！
No encouragement at all.
Can you hold the wheel? 嘿，握一下方向盘
You want some? 来一点？
Uh, yes. Thank you. 呃...当然，谢啦
Save me some. -留一些给我 -我会的
I will.
I think I've got a bit of a cold coming. 我想我有点快感冒了
Here, listen to this! 拿去，听听这个
I apologise for not being currently available. 我很抱歉您打来没人接
Be so kind as to leave your name and message. 希望您可以好心地留下姓名与留言
So, why don't you just get an ordinary job? 我说，你怎么不乾脆找个正常点的工作？
- 9 to 5? - That's the one. 朝九晚五的那种？
没错
Getting up in the morning, coming home late at night. 早上起大早出门，晚上很晚才回家
On the nose. 这类的
Full time. 全职工作...你曾经做过吗？
What, have you ever had one of those?
- Nope. - Ohh. 没
I've done a bit of valeting work for a friend of me brother's. 我曾经给我老哥他朋友干过随从
And? 结果？
I head-butted the bloke. 我用头撞晕了那个小子
Your version of putting your head down and getting on with it, I suppose. 我假设这是你用来说“老子他妈不干了”的方式？
He tried to fiddle with me sister. 他试着要调戏我老妹啊
And then later on, you know, ah s— I don't know. 后来，嗯，你知道，呃，我不知道
And now you don't know what? 嗯，你不知道啥？
Nothing. Just later on 没什么，只是...后来...嗯，我老哥Gavvy他自杀了
my brother Gavvy killed himself.
Well, you know don't have to say anything, Stuart. 你什么都不用说，Stuart
Talk about it another time. 改天再谈这事儿
Yeah. Thanks. 嗯，谢了
When the police found Gavvy they said he'd really suffered. 当警察找到Gavvy的时候，他们说他死的很痛苦
The tablets he'd taken had eaten his kidneys and his liver away before he died. 他吃下去的那些药在他死之前腐蚀了他的肾和肝
And he had been in absolute agony dying. 所以警察推断他死得非常痛苦
And I'm glad. 而我很开心
I'm glad my brother suffered. 我很开心，因为我哥哥死得痛苦
- Chainsaw carved mushrooms? - Fucking hell. 电锯雕刻蘑菇
我擦这啥
What did they do to deserve that? 蘑菇做了啥要这样遭虐？
Fucking nice little number you got going here, mate. 老兄，你这儿赚得可多了
You get many knob heads falling for it? 让很多傻蛋来跟你买这东西，是吧？
Yeah, plenty. 是啊，足够多啦
Oh wow. 哇喔
I'm James. Good to see you. 我是James，很高兴见到你， Alexander一直拿你的事儿给我洗脑
Alexander's told me all about you.
Reuben, yes? 你是Reuben，对吧？
- I'm Dido. - Ah, you have a lovely house. 我是Dido
喔，你的房子非常可爱
- Hello, darling. - Hi, hi, hi. 嗨，亲爱的，你最近过得如何？
- Good to see you. - This is for you. 很高兴见到你
Ooh, thank you. Lovely, mmm. 谢谢，你真贴心
Now, Alexander told you that I'm an alcoholic, hasn't he? 嗯，Alexander有告诉过你们我是个酒鬼吧？
I'm also a Schedule 1 offender and a thief, but I won't cause no trouble. 我也是个你们只会想要扫地出门的垃圾 也是个小偷，不过我不会惹麻烦的
May I have a tour of the estate, please? 我可以参观一下院子吗？拜託
- Is that a pear tree? - Yeah. 那是棵梨树吗？
没错
You can make cider out of that. 那可以做梨子酒。还有苹果呢，不是吗？
And them apples, eh?
Famous actors used to come here and play tennis, like Lawrence Olivier and— 有名的演员曾经来这打过网球呢， 像是Laurence Olivier [Laurence Olivier（劳伦斯·奥利弗）：英国演员，曾与费雯丽结婚]
Lawrence Olivier? Really? Right there? Laurence Olivier？真的？就在这儿？
21-Love! 二十五比零，嘿嘿 [Stuart说错了比分，网球中没有二十五分]
Hey!
You ought to knock all of them trees down and build a go-kart course. 你可以把这些树都砍了，盖个小赛车场
If you fix this place up it would be really lovely here. 那会很适合这地方的，真的啦
[Spirit in the Sky - Norman Greenbaum]
小心点，很烫
Ooh, [indiscernible]. Very nice. 正山小种，对吧？真棒 [正山小种（Lapsang Souchong）：产自武夷山的着名红茶]
Ooh, it's very tasty. Yeah. 喝起来味道很好
Fucking amazing here. 真他妈的惊人
Yeah, A-fucking-One. 是啊，真他妈的棒
They're so false. 这太假了吧 那胸部，假的啊
False tits.
Now, I prefer a bit of natural bounce myself. 我个人是比较喜欢自然有弹性的啦
I mean, and if they're going to sag, they're going to sag, aren't they? 我是说，就算它们不够挺，也只好让它们垂着了 自然就好
I don't get it, Alexander. 我搞不懂欸，Alexander
How come you're so interested in homeless people? 你怎么会对游民这么有兴趣
I'm not. I was only working at Wintercomfort because the money was good. 我没有啊
我只是因为待遇很棒才在冬憩所工作， 时薪九英镑，还是轮班制
Nine quid an hour. And the hours, shift work.
How long are these onions meant to cook? 这些洋葱该煮多久？
Till they feel satisfied. 你对工作感到满足吗？
And then it meant I could write in the morning. 不全是这样，这么说好了， 这表示我可以在白天有空闲时间写作
Yeah, but why? 好吧，但是为啥？
Look, Stuart, if I was interested in you as a homeless person, 听着，Stuart，如果我只是因为你是个游民而想要研究你
I'd have been sacked for unprofessional conduct ages ago. 我早就不会这么不专业地持续跟你约会碰面了
- So? - So I like you as a friend, is that so bad? 这又是啥意思？
这表示我把你当朋友，这有那么奇怪吗？
Fenugreek? 胡芦巴粉？ [胡芦巴（Fenugreek）：地中海地区的一种香料，亦可入药]
It's a bit weird if you ask me. 如果你问我意见的话，这两味不太搭
Couldn't agree more. 我也这么认为
—seven, eight. There's always somebody what won't want two. 反正这东西里头总有些调料不怎么搭，或多或少而已
Yeah, but why? 嗯？但是到底为啥呢？
Because you're funny, intelligent, good company. 因为你为人风趣、机智，而且是个好同伴
What do you want, a fucking love letter? Now shut up and drink your freaking beer. 你到底想要什么答案？要我写封他妈的情书不成？
现在闭嘴喝你该死的啤酒去
Marvellous. 你真有才，再说一次这东西叫什么？
- What was it again? - "Convict Curry". 咖哩“犯”
Hey Stuart, it's Thursday! You gotta tell! 嘿，Stuart，今天是星期四了
No, not now. 是可以谈那件事的日子
不了，不要现在谈
Come on. A promise is a promise. 别这样，你可是答应过了的，来嘛。
Come on, you've talked to us about everything else. 其他的事情你的说的差不多了
Give it a rest, Alexander. 放过那件事吧，Alexander，你不会想知道的
- You don't wanna know. - Stuart's first prison sentence. 是有关Stuart第一次被关监的原因
He'll only talk about it on a Thursday 他只在星期四谈论这事儿
because he gets his dole money Wednesday afternoons, which means that 因为他星期三下午有钱去买药
if talking about it upsets him, he's still got enough heroin left to calm him down. 这样一来如果谈论这让他太噁心
他体内还会有足够的海洛因让自己保持冷静 我说的没错吧？
Is that right?
It was nothing. 这真的没什么好说的
I was— 我当时...当晚在一间酒吧里
I was in the pub one night.
It was the little 'un's birthday. 那天是小傢伙的生日
I was, I was in the pub celebrating. 我...我在酒吧庆祝
It was over ten years ago. 这已经是十几年前的破事了，反正当时有个人说...
This bloke says...
It was just nastiness. 我那时很糟糕
Come on. 别这样
Alexander, please. Alexander...拜託...
Look, Thursday's the day. 今天是星期四，你不能逃避，好吗？
So I come home. 总之，我回到家
[Indiscernible] says, "you've been fucking [indiscernible]." Marvin说你跟Graham搞在一起了
You're drunk. 你喝醉了！ 你如果想要就得用强的
If you want it, you gotta rape me.
I'll fucking kill you, you cunt! 我他妈杀了你，婊子！
Get out! 走开！你他妈滚蛋！
You wanted a fucking baby! 你他妈的把宝宝吵醒了！
And I think then I realised that I had made a proper mess of it all, really. 我不认为他们有意识到我那时的精神状态已经一团糟了
I'm fucking leaving. 我要走了
You fucking are now! 你他妈不准走
-操 -你耍我玩是不是，啊？
Did you fuck around with me!? Yeah!?
I'm a bit ashamed of that to be honest. 说实话我真的觉得这件事很可耻
Go on, fuck off! Fuck off, [indiscernible]. Oh, for fuck's sake. 滚！闪远点！
你们滚！我根本不认识你们！
Go on, fuck off! 快滚，快滚
快滚，该滚哪那儿去
Fucking hell! 他妈的见鬼
It's alright. 没事的啊...滚蛋！
Fuck off!
So we sat around for a bit 所以我们小坐了会，冷静下后决定要一起走出去
and decided we'd come out together.
We're coming out now. We're together. 我们现在要出来了，我们一起出来，我很抱歉...
I'm sorry.
Go! Get him! 快上，快抓住他
Connie, just shoot the fucker! 你们就不能直接崩了他一了百了吗？
He just lost it. It's not Stuart. 他整个人都失控了，那已经不是Stuart了
Move! Move! 冲啊！冲啊！
他妈的快冲进去！
把这傢伙带走！
快点！
Lovely stay, Alexander. Thank you very much. Alexander，在你朋友这呆着挺不错，谢啦。 我真的玩得挺开心
I really enjoyed it.
I was really surprised, Alexander, to be honest. 我真的觉得很惊讶，Alexander，老实说
I thought that middle class people had something wrong with them, you know? 我以为中产阶级的人都有点那啥...
But they're just ordinary, aren't they? I was a bit shocked, to tell the truth. 但他们就只是...普通人
说实话我真被吓到了
Over the next few months Stuart's trial for the attempted manslaughter 接下来几个月， 关於Stuart试图谋杀那个要帮他做砰砰咻床的邻居
of his not poofter, boing-boing-whoosh bed making neighbour was postponed once, ...这案子的审判期一拖再拖
先是被推迟了一次...两次
twice,
a third time, 第三次...
and then a fourth. 接着竟然还有第四次
He needed some cash so I gave him 250 quid for his car 他急需点现金用，所以我用
250镑买下他那台车
and I'm still waiting for the paperwork. 但是到现在都还没过户
Meanwhile, the campaign went from strength to strength. 与此同时，我们的抗议活动声势逐渐壮大，越演越烈
Newsletters, petitions, protests, even benefit gigs. 不仅登报抗议、举办示威活动，甚至还组织了义演
And then it was Stuart's bright idea to go and see our local MP. 后来我们还去找了当区的下院议员， 多亏了Stuart的聪明主意
Oh shit. 喔...真该死
I'm sorry, I'm just a bit nervous is all. 抱歉啦我只是有点紧张
Mr Shorter is not from Anne's constituency— Shorter先生并非Anna行政区的居民
I'm from Anne's constituency. I wish to take Stuart as my guest. 我住在Anna的行政区
-我想让Stuart做我的陪同 -Alexander
Alexander... 这样一来，您得重新预约一次见面时间
For that you'll have to make a new appointment. 喔，别胡说八道了， 她这时间又没别的事要忙，不是吗？
Oh, rubbish! She's got nothing else to do, has she?
The council is not gonna have no emergency winter shelter for the homeless. 本来那个冬季紧急收容所就开在 离地方议会不到半英哩外的地方
And I'm frightened— 而我很担心...
...呃，抱歉...
In winter it's smack what keeps you fucking— 冬天时，这紧急收容所可以他妈的让你
I'm sorry. 抱歉
—keeps you warm. 让你不再受冻，但今年
But this year there's going to be one more death a month, again.
每个月冻死几个人，甚至更多的情况将再度发生
Why? -为什么？ -因为小狗崽
Puppies.
I'm not sure I follow you. 我想我不明白您的意思
On the streets. 就在街上，小...小狗崽
Pup—puppies.
'Cause the homeless love their dogs, right? 嗯...因为那些游民很爱他们的狗狗，这你知道吧
But the hostels only allow two to three places for pets. 但是那些政府补助的收容寓所 通常只能允许2-3个人养宠物
So, if there has been two new litters, 所以，如果街上新出现了两窝小狗崽
then loads more people are gonna have dogs, aren't they? 就会有更多的游民会养宠物了，对吧
And therefore will be forced to sleep out. 因此，因为没有冬季紧急避难所， 寓所又不给养，他们只好住街上了
And hence... therefore... furthermore, more deaths. 这表示，也就是说， 会有更多，更多游民在外被冻死
You see, on the street it's the little things that kill people. 你看，在街头，就是这些小事最要人命
That Justice Howarth must hate the campaign's guts. Humiliation! 那个Howarth法官要对咱的抗争恨之入骨啦
Seven months after they were sent down Ruth and John— 想想这对他来说是多大的羞辱
在入监服刑长达七个月之久后，Ruth与John -终於能够保释出狱了
—have been released on bail after a high profile campaign by MPs
归功於下院议员以及其他慈善机构的高调抗议活动
and other homeless charities, they won the right to appeal against prison sentences
four and five years. 他们终於推翻了服刑四年以及五年的判决
This was our first sight of Ruth Wyner and John Brock on the steps of the 这是Ruth Wyner及John Brock
今早步出法院的画面
Royal Courts of Justice this morning. 在监狱呆了七个月后
After seven months in jail, the so-called "Cambridge Two" have been released on
号称“剑桥二人组”的两人已经无条件保释
unconditional bail and are now free to challenge their original convictions. 并且可以自由地对他们先前收到的判决进行上诉了
I can't see if the light's on.
Stuart, it's Alexander. Stop whatever illegal thing it is Stuart，我是Alexander， 不管你在干什么违法乱纪的事儿，都赶紧放着过来这儿
that you're doing and get down here!
It's me muscular dystrophy. 是我的肌肉萎缩症造成的啦
Humeroscapu... or something. Muscular dystrophy. 肱骨——什么的，反正是种肌肉萎缩症
It's a real gobstopper, I never learnt the name. 这玩意儿挺难记的，但我也从没想去查清楚
What you don't know can't hurt you. 老话不是说你不知道的东西就伤不了你吗
I only came in to see the nurse because I wanted a cuddle and it spits too soon. 我进医院就想来瞧瞧护士，顺便抱她们两下
往那个什么里面吐点...
Stuart! -Stuart -嗯欸
I thought maybe it's because of me muscular dystrophy. 我是这么想啦，因为我得的是肌肉萎缩症
You know, 'cause your dick's a muscle, isn't it? -然后老二上也全是肌肉，对吧？所以我才... -嘘~~
It started on me ticker. 起先只是胸口那儿有点刺痛 ...总之他们试了两次
They tried twice to put a pacemaker in me tit,
想在我心脏那安个起博器
but the veins just crumble 'cause of the amount of critic I've injected. 但我那边上的血管全脆啦，一碰就碎光 谁叫我打过那么多柠檬酸和海洛因进去呢 [柠檬酸可以用来溶解海洛因]
Gotta laugh, haven't you? 挺好笑的哈？
I can't believe he hadn't told you. 我真不敢相信他还没跟你提过这事 他总是告诉大家所有事情
He tells everyone. About everything.
- Well, now, that's not true. - Mum, yes. 才不呢，他才没这样
That's his way of coping, isn't it? 妈妈，他就是那样。 他说那是他调节的方法，不是吗？
Twenty years. Non-stop. 二十年了，打从他第一次走上街头就没停过
Ever since he first went on the streets.
Twenty years? 所以，他已经上街头二十年了？ 但我一直以为是因为Gavvy...嗯...
But I thought it was Gavvy's, um, his brother's suicide that made him homeless. 他哥哥自杀那事让他成为游民
Don't be stupid. 别傻了，Stuart从十二岁就开始时不时地上街头混了
Stuart had been on and off the streets since he was twelve.
Then, all of a sudden, this little horror. 这场恶梦突然间就开始了 12岁，从那时他开始不对劲儿
Twelve years old, that's when it started.
Gavvy had to run to fetch mum. Gavvy不得不跑去妈上班的地方叫她回家
Come, it's Stuart! 妈妈，Stuart出事了！
Put me into care! You hear me!? 带我去儿童之家！听见没！
Do it now otherwise I'll kill you! 现在就带我去！不然我杀了你们！
Put me into care now! I'll do the lot of you! Put me into care! 现在就带我去！否则我要杀了你们！
带我去儿童之家
I said, put me into care! 我说！带?我?去?儿童之家
In you get. Watch your head. 走吧，当心别磕着头了
He was taken into care that night. 他那天晚上就进了儿童之家 然后我们有三星期没见着他
We didn't see him for three weeks.
Another one for you, Mr Laverack. 又来一个小子啦，Laverack先生
You're getting popular, he asked to come. 你会很受欢迎的
他自己要求来这儿
Poor boy. Poor boy. 可怜的孩子，真可怜
性变态者对孩子下手，璫琅入狱获刑十八年
滔天罪恶露出冰山一角，犯罪组织侵童东窗事发
Out of the frying pan into the fire. 躲过了小灾，却跳进大劫里
Well, we weren't the frying pan. 喔，我们当初并没有虐待他
You know what I mean. 妈，你知道我指的是什么
We just couldn't understand it. 我只是真的不明白
People said she ought to disown him. 人们都说她应该跟Stuart断绝关系
How can you wash your hands of your own child? 可你怎么能不要自己的孩子呢？
He's my flesh and blood, I'd say. 我告诉他们，他是我的亲骨肉 他是我的儿子
He's my son. 我只希望自己能再为他多做些
I just wish I could do more.
Working on the book after the end of the campaign, writing, rewriting, 抗争结束之后，我一直在撰写那本书
I realised then that I could never hope to justify or explain Stuart. 写了又写，改了又改，然后我意识到
我永远无法替Stuart开脱或解释他的所作所为
And whatever had murdered his innocence had long ago ceased 无论是什么扼杀了他曾有过的纯真
to be simple enough to sort out with words. 都早已複杂到言语难以描述的地步了
All I could hope to do was to staple him to the page. 我只能忠实地把一切写出来
- Hello? - It's in me tit. 喂？
I'm at Papworth Heart Hospital. Come visit. 他们装好起搏器啦！ 我在Papworth医院心脏科这，来看我吧
Yeah, on your way, can you pop in to see me gran and grandpa? 呃嗯，你过来的路上能不能顺道去看看我外公外婆
They've got a present for me. 他们有没有礼物要给我？我也不知道耶， 我现在浑身都不舒服
I told them it smells like sick but they don't listen.
我真的挺想念他们的
We haven't seen Stuart in years. 我们已经几年没见到Stuart了，真的好多年了
Lots of years.
Well, things haven't been very easy for him recently. 呃，他最近过得挺不顺利的
His mother says it's the buses. 他妈妈说是因为到这儿要转公车，他们实在抽不出空儿
They're not convenient.
Stuart? -这是Stuart？ -不是
- No. - Rory, his son.
那是Rory，他儿子
- Stuart. - No. -这是Stuart? -不
Rex, his dad. 那是Rex，他老爸
A bad man, his real dad. 他亲爹是个坏傢伙
Gypsies. 是个吉普塞人
Stuart? -这是Stuart？ -那是Gavvy，他哥哥
Gavvy, Stuey's brother.
One day when Rex was beating our Judith real bad, 某一次，Rex把Judith打得够惨
Gavvy hit him over the head with a broom. Gavvy当时才五岁，可他拿了扫帚狠砸Rex的脑袋
He was only five.
Rex moved out after that. 后来Rex就搬走了
I know why Stuart changed. 我知道是什么改变了Stuart，Gavvy特地过来告诉我的
Gavvy came 'round special to tell me.
Promised I'd never tell. 我向他保证过，永远不说出去
Three days later he committed suicide. 三天后他就自杀了
To celebrate his getting better. 这个用来庆祝他的康复
Couldn't decide red or white. 决定不了要给他红酒或白酒
Tell him to come and see us. We've waited long enough. 告诉他我们已经等够久了，叫他来看看我们
Can't wait forever. 没办法永远等着他
Oh, you fucking star. [只允许食用清流质食物] 哦，你他妈的真是我的神
I almost died. 我差点就挂啦
How are Ruth and John? Ruth和John怎么样了？
Not good. 他们不太好
He can't work. John没法工作，他老婆说他在睡梦中会哭
Wife says he cries in his sleep.
And Ruth? 嗯...那Ruth呢？
Got cancer. 她得了癌症
Bastards. 这帮混帐
Now do you see what I mean about the system? 现在你还要帮体制说好话吗？都是他们的错
The system. It's the system that's going to keep her alive. 体制的错？就是这个破体制现在撑着让她活下去
It's the system that's just given you a ￡5,000 pacemaker for nothing. 也是同一个体制，刚免费替你装了一个五千镑的起博器
- Hello? - Excuse me guys, do either of you know where the toilet is? 哈啰？
打扰下，请问你们知道卫生间在哪吗？
Uh, yeah, sure. I saw a sign that said down there on the left. 呃...当然，我之前有看到标志，前面左转就是了
Thanks, mate. 谢啦，夥计
Fucking hell. 我擦，我需要来根菸
I need a cigarette.
Yeah, the whole town's like it. 没错，整个阵子都像这样，全他妈是残废
All cripples.
I spent six years in a school like this. 我在一个跟这很像的学校呆了六年
Day I end up like that, eh, 所幸最后没变这样，也没挂点
death day.
Care was like this? 儿童之家是像这样？
No. Spagie school. 不，是残障学校
They sent me because of my muscular dystrophy. 他们说我有肌肉萎缩症，把我送去那儿
Said I wasn't allowed to go to proper school. 说我这样的孩子不适合上正常学校
Well, it was the '70s. 那是七十年代，人们的思想还很保守。
Funny thing, that. There was nothing wrong with me at that stage. 有趣的是那时我还没显出什么毛病呢
I was just a bit uncoordinated, but you'd hardly notice. 只是身体有点儿不协调，但这事谁也说不准吧
But they said since I was going to die a spag, 但他们说，我的脊椎总有天会撑不下去
I might as well get used to the idea. 而我总得先适应那样的生活
Before I was too spagie to understand, I suppose. 我当时还迷迷糊糊的 根本就搞不懂这啥意思
Now all together. 现在，大家一起跟着念
Douchebag! Douchebag! Douchebag!
Gimpy! Oi, gimpy, come here! 嘿，瘸子，过来
Where's your brother now? 怎么不去找你哥啊？
来啊，小瘸子
'Help me! Hold me! Love me!' 救救我！
撑住我！来爱我！噁心死啦~~
We're coming to kill you. 我们就要过来宰了你啦！
Did they kick the shit out of you? 他们把你修理得很惨？
Every day, mate. 每天都是那样，老兄。这样他们放学之后才不会无聊
Give 'em something to do after school.
Then Gavvy would console me. 然后Gavvy就会安慰我
Please, not Howarth. Please, not— 拜託啊，可千万别是Howarth，拜託别是Howarth [Howarth是之前判Ruth和John刑的法官]
Only one month out of Papworth, Stuart's day in court for 从Papworth出院后一个月
Stuart意图把他邻居头砍下的案子
attempting to cut off his neighbour's head finally arrived. 几经拖延后终於要开庭了
We were dreading it would be Ruth and John's old judge. 而我们都很怕法官会是当年判Ruth与John重刑的法官
Oh fuck! 喔，马勒隔壁的
All rise for Justice Howarth. 全体起立，有请Howarth法官
At this point Stuart really was looking at being imprisoned for life. 那会儿， Stuart真是差点就要把后半辈子都花在牢里了
Court is now in session. 现在开庭
This case concerns Stuart Clive Shorter. 本案被告Stuart Clive Shorter
Affray, disorderly conduct, resisting arrest, 因在其公寓内与人斗殴
an incident at the accused's flat. 妨碍治安，以及拒捕而遭起诉
借过
No. No, he just said the whole thing was nonsense. 不，不，他只说这整件事都是鬼扯，胡说八道
All that adding charges, taking them away, attempted murder, not— 那些附加的指控、意图杀人啊 甚至是罚款什么的都一次清了
I don't know, I mean, what can I say? 我知道这很扯，但我还能说啥呢？ 这幸运的混蛋彻底逃过一劫了！
The lucky bastard got off on a series of technicalities.
You know what Judge Howarth thinks about— 这真太扯了，你知道吗？Howarth法官一定是...
Oh shit. Stuart, I'm so sorry. Are you alright? 喔见鬼Stuart，太抱歉了！见鬼！你还好吗？ 我真的很抱歉
I'm so sorry.
[Paul Weller - Headstart For Happiness]
He's free! He's absolutely fucking free. 他自由啦！他妈的他彻底自由啦！
好，现在把这玩意儿装满
Oh, you're disgusting. 喔你真够噁心
Wakey, wakey. 起床啦，起床啦
Sun has got his hat on, mate. Sun has got his hat on, mate. 老兄，太阳要晒屁股啦！
老兄，太阳晒屁股啦！
Rise and shine! 喔，他起来照亮世界啦~
Now, I've got to try on a suit for me sister's wedding. 你可以顺路载我去试套西装吗？我要穿去我老妹的婚礼
Can you give me a lift?
Have you listened to the tape? 你听录音带了吗？
I was nine, Alexander, when it started. Nine. 那时我九岁，Alexander，当一切开始的时候，才九岁
It was three years of abuse. 那之后我被虐待了三年 （此处虐待指的是性虐待）
My own brother. 被我自个儿的亲哥哥
And then his mate joined in. 后来还加上他朋友
That night, I ju— I couldn't, I couldn't take it no more, you know? 那一晚，我只是没法儿... 我受不住了，你知道，再也无法承受...
They had done everything. 我甚至不害怕了
There was nothing more they could do. 他已经不可能做出更糟的事了
- You got any more of these? - Yeah, backseat, I think. 你还有这玩意儿(啤酒)吗?
嗯，我想后座还有些
I think the reason mum still pampers him like she does 我想妈妈到现在还这样容忍他
is because she feels guilty about what Gavvy did. 是因为她对Gavvy所做的事有罪恶感
But he did the same to me. 但Gavvy他也虐待了我
I'm the same as Stu. 我的情绪就跟Stu一样难捉摸 前一秒还是大家的小甜心
One minute, nice as pie; next minute, I'm a rattlesnake.
但下一秒就变成一条嘶嘶吐信的毒蛇
How'd I get to be like this? What murdered the little boy I was? 我是怎么搞到今天这样的？
是什么杀害了当初的我？
When the police found Gavvy, they said he'd really suffered. 警察找到了Gavvy，他们说他死前很痛苦
你们全都他妈的滚
Legs all over the show. 我乐意分享那些，但看起来...
That boy has suffered. 那孩子饱受痛苦
Happy-go-lucky little thing. 无忧无虑的小东西
Mr Laverack. Laverack先生，这是Stuart
- Poor boy. Poor boy. - Out of the frying pan into the fire. 可怜的孩子，真可怜
- Put me into care now! - Douchebag! Douchebag! 带我去儿童之家！
- Douchebag! Douchebag! Douchebag! - We're coming to kill you.
The tablets he'd taken had eaten his kidneys and his liver away before he died. 他的肾脏与肝脏在他死前都腐蚀了
Always such a caring boy. Happy-go-lucky little thing. 总是那么的贴心，无忧无虑的小东西 我很高兴Gavvy死得痛苦
And I'm glad.
I'm glad Gavvy suffered.
That's Gavvy. 这就是Gavvy
That's Gavvy and me. 这是Gavvy跟我
So he's what murdered the boy you were. 所以就是他谋杀了曾经的你？
- What made you change. - Ah, wasn't that. 让你改变的人？
不哪...不干他的事儿
What was it then? 那是什么？
So many people have had the same sort of childhood and experiences 很多人童年经历和我一样
as what I have and they learn to accept and cope and live a very, 但他们接受并适应了这些
in brackets, "normal and competitive life". 并且都能够过上得体、正常，很有意义的生活
I'm quite philosophical about that. 这点上我倒是挺想得开的
If you had to change one thing about your life, what would it be? 如果你得从人生中选一件事，你想要改变什么？
Well, how much is one thing? 我要怎么选出其中一件呢？
It's very easy to blame, isn't it? 那样的话我就可以轻松地把一切都怪罪在它上面，是不是？
Me muscular dystrophy? 肌肉萎缩症吗？
Nonces? 各种成瘾？还是Gavvy？
Gavvy?
Honestly, it'd be easier to change me. 说实话，倒不如把我自个儿改掉最容易
One thing only. 选一件就是了
The day I discovered violence. 我发现暴力的那一天
Me step-father 我继父，他说如果我不自己出去搞定这事儿，
said if I didn't go out there and stick up for myself,
he'd belt us once. 他就拿皮带抽我们
Fucking fantastic. 太他妈的神奇了
Weakling became strong. 不再是弱小的那一方
The day that I found violence 我发现暴力那天，感觉自己强壮了不只五十倍
I felt fifty times more strong.
After you've been bullied and pushed about, called spastic, 在你总是被欺负，被叫作废物 被欺凌了这么久之后你会知道
you learn that violence, and fear of violence, and madness, it scares people. 暴力这东西 以及对暴力的恐惧，还有疯狂
足够唬住别人的了
I used to deliberately get myself in a rage. 我过去常常让自己处於一种狂怒的状态 这样六个月过去后
And after six months, I found I couldn't stop them.
我发现我无法停止
I wasn't making the madness up no more. 之后那疯狂就再也不是我能掌控的了
You know what, Alexander? 你知道吗，Alexander？
I don't know myself or [indiscernible]. 我也不了解我自己
Madness.
Sometimes I think I'm the child of the devil. 有时候我觉得自己是恶魔之子
I let the devil in. 我让他住进心底
Now I can't get him out. 就再也无法摆脱他了
I tried... 我试过那么多方式，想把他烧出来或是割下来
burning him out, and cutting him out, and...
he don't take no notice. 但他只是笑着说“不不，我不走” 他为什么要走呢？
Why should he?
He don't wanna be homeless. 他也不想无家可归
You know, there's still one question left. 你猜怎么，我们就只剩一个问题了
- What's that, mate? - Guess. -那是啥，朋友？ -你猜
We're writing the book backwards, 既然这本书得倒着写
so what's the last bit of information we need? 那么我们最后需要的讯息是啥？
What's your date of birth? 你的出生日期呢？
Oh, right, yeah.
喔，对了，当然 我是Stuart Clive Shorter
I am Stuart Clive Shorter.
I was born on the 19th of the 9th, 1968. 我在1968年第9个月的19号出生
So, you're... 所以你...
- You're 33. - I am 33. I'm getting older, as they say. -你33岁啦 -我现在33岁，年岁渐长，如人们描述的那样
And I have led a very controversial and unpleasant life. 我过着一种很有争议性，而且也并不怎么愉快的生活
Oh, yeah. 啊哈
Eh? Best man or what, eh?
把我一枪轰到墙上，如何？
It is gonna be grand. 那感觉应该会很爽
[Jerry Keller - Here Comes Summer]
P—P—P—Peterborough, Cambridge—
—on 96 and 95.7 FM. And 1026 AM. BBC Radio Cambridgeshire. FM96及99.7兆赫 现在是上午10点26分
剑桥郡BBC广播电台
The top story this hour—
—near the French entrance to the channel tunnel. ...海底隧道的法国入口处附近的难民营...
Police have now formally indentified the man who died after being hit 警方正式确认了今天稍早在剑桥被火车撞死的男子的身分
by a train near Cambridge early this morning.
He was Stuart Shorter, a 33-year-old from Waterbeach. 该男子名为Stuart Shorter
The coroner has been informed and an inquest will take place at a date to be fixed. 33岁，来自水滩镇
警方已经通知法医验屍
并展开死因鑑定
Judith? It's Alexander. Judith，是我，Alexander
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. 全知全能的上主，我们的主耶苏基督之父赐福
Was it suicide? 那是自杀吗？我也不知道 他甚至没留张字条解释
I don't know. He didn't leave a note.
But then, suicides often don't. 但话又说回来，自杀的人通常也不留
All I do know is that he stepped in front of the 11:15 Cambridge to Kings Lynn. 我只知道，他向前迈了一步
走到11点15分从剑桥开往金斯林的火车前
—I have overcome the world, says the Lord.
上主说，我已征服了全世界
Since the Earthly life of Stuart has come to an end, Stuart在尘世的生活已然结束
we commit his body to be buried. 我们将在此埋葬他的肉体
Earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust. 让尘归尘，土归土 并坚定地希望
In sure and certain hope of the resurrection to eternal life.
他很快会从死里复活，在主耶苏基督面前享受永生 阿门
- To our Lord Jesus Christ, Amen. - Amen.
阿门
Hello, Alexander. It's Stuart. 哈啰，Alexander 这是 Stuart
Hello, Stuart. 哈啰, Stuart.
You know, admitting I've had lots to drink and that, but I can't help reflect about my brother 你知道吗？我和...我现在喝了很多酒... 我无法阻止自己...
去回想我哥哥和他的朋友对我做的事...
and my brother's friend.
And they didn't believe me. ...那些人不相信我， 还有在儿童之家的时候，那些虐待
And they didn't care.
The abuse.
Being asked to do things that I wouldn't have thought possible that anyone 他们让我做的那些事
could ask of an 11-year-old. 我一直觉得没可能会有人要一个十一岁孩子去做
I'm just head-butting, and head-butting, and head-butting, and head-butting. 我只是不停的拿头去撞啊撞， 撞啊撞，撞啊撞，撞啊撞......
The more that you speak, the more they disbelieve. 你越是常常谈起的事，听起来就越不真实
And nobody was listening to anything I had to say. 而总是没有人认真听我说那些对我来说很重要的话
When I've got my drink inside me 所以我让自己喝到茫然
I sit here having mad conversations with myself.
然后坐着疯言疯语
Talking about mutilating myself,
大谈自毁和自杀 顺便拖着那些该负责的人下地狱
killing myself,
tracking down those who are responsible.
I want to just lay down and die. 我所期望的不过就是躺下来死掉
I feel so dirty, and fucking horrible 我觉得自己如此污秽，又他妈的可怕
and hating and attacking anyone I get close to. 我仇恨、攻击每个靠近我的人
I just wish 我只是希望，哪怕一次也好，能够逃离这种疯狂
once
there could be an escape from this madness.
The book was finally published in April 2005. 这本书最终在2005年4月出版了
I think Stuart would have liked it. 我认为Stuart会喜欢它的