1
00:00:21,200 --> 00:00:23,191
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

2
00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:36,275
John, guess what.

3
00:00:36,440 --> 00:00:37,873
I left my husband.

4
00:00:38,040 --> 00:00:41,237
After all this time,
we can finally be together.

5
00:00:42,800 --> 00:00:44,597
I hate this dream.

6
00:00:45,600 --> 00:00:46,589
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

7
00:00:46,760 --> 00:00:47,909
MEGAN:
John.

8
00:00:48,080 --> 00:00:50,958
John, it's me, Megan.

9
00:00:53,200 --> 00:00:56,510
John, it really is me
and I really did leave my husband.

10
00:00:56,680 --> 00:00:58,716
I wanna be with you.

11
00:01:04,280 --> 00:01:08,432
- Oh. Oh, my God. Megan.
- Oh. Ha, ha.

12
00:01:18,840 --> 00:01:19,955
Is John in here?

13
00:01:20,120 --> 00:01:22,953
No.
So far today is completely Becker-free.

14
00:01:23,120 --> 00:01:25,350
I don't ask why. I just enjoy it.

15
00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:27,238
He flaked on the Knicks game
Saturday night.

16
00:01:27,400 --> 00:01:29,197
I stood outside of the Garden
for an hour

17
00:01:29,360 --> 00:01:31,635
saying, "John, John?"
To everybody who passed by.

18
00:01:31,800 --> 00:01:33,836
I mean, sure,
I met a few hookers, but...

19
00:01:35,320 --> 00:01:36,469
You should've called him.

20
00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:38,113
I did. He wouldn't pick up his phone.

21
00:01:38,280 --> 00:01:39,474
I didn't hear from him either.

22
00:01:39,680 --> 00:01:42,797
He usually leaves obsessive
little messages all weekend.

23
00:01:42,960 --> 00:01:45,030
"Did you call in that prescription?

24
00:01:45,240 --> 00:01:46,798
Did you confirm
Monday's appointments?

25
00:01:47,000 --> 00:01:49,560
Did Linda take my stapler?"

26
00:01:49,720 --> 00:01:51,438
That was an emergency.

27
00:01:51,600 --> 00:01:54,398
You try hemming a skirt
on the subway.

28
00:01:55,640 --> 00:01:58,108
- Is Becker here?
- Why does everyone care?

29
00:01:58,280 --> 00:02:00,874
You know the minute he gets here,
we're all gonna wish he'd leave.

30
00:02:01,080 --> 00:02:03,355
Listen to this.
Bob heard through the grapevine...

31
00:02:03,560 --> 00:02:05,516
Okay, through the airshaft
in our building.

32
00:02:05,720 --> 00:02:08,314
- The unmistakable sounds of sex
coming from Becker's apartment.

33
00:02:08,520 --> 00:02:09,953
Moaning, groaning, screaming...

34
00:02:10,160 --> 00:02:11,798
Okay, Bob, we get it.

35
00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:13,558
Which leads Bob
to only one conclusion:

36
00:02:13,720 --> 00:02:16,757
Becker went out of town
and loaned his apartment to someone.

37
00:02:18,360 --> 00:02:20,396
Bob, obviously,
he had a woman in there.

38
00:02:20,600 --> 00:02:22,591
Even if he did,
that's no excuse for flaking on me.

39
00:02:22,760 --> 00:02:25,911
Okay, it's a great excuse,
but still, I'm pretty upset about it.

40
00:02:26,120 --> 00:02:27,519
Becker having sex?

41
00:02:27,680 --> 00:02:29,238
No, I don't see it.

42
00:02:29,400 --> 00:02:31,356
But if I get that new drill, I will.

43
00:02:36,200 --> 00:02:38,555
Bob, first of all, you're an idiot.

44
00:02:38,720 --> 00:02:40,597
And second...

45
00:02:40,760 --> 00:02:42,398
No, that pretty much covers it.

46
00:02:44,560 --> 00:02:46,790
- Morning, everyone.
- Hey, hey, don't "good morning" me.

47
00:02:46,960 --> 00:02:48,951
- What happened to you Saturday?
- Jake, I'm sorry.

48
00:02:49,120 --> 00:02:51,031
I don't even care
if you did get a woman into bed.

49
00:02:51,200 --> 00:02:53,998
She better be the hottest
and nastiest thing you ever been with.

50
00:02:54,160 --> 00:02:56,196
I'd like to think I was.

51
00:02:56,400 --> 00:02:58,072
Oh, man.

52
00:02:58,920 --> 00:03:01,150
Megan, you remember everybody.
This is Megan.

53
00:03:01,320 --> 00:03:04,312
- I think you remember Jake, Margaret.
MARGARET & LINDA: Hi.

54
00:03:04,520 --> 00:03:07,432
So, Dr. Becker, we heard you had
hot and nasty sex all weekend.

55
00:03:07,600 --> 00:03:08,715
Who with?

56
00:03:10,600 --> 00:03:15,799
Well, it was nice seeing everyone,
but I have to run a few errands.

57
00:03:16,200 --> 00:03:18,714
I'm sure we'll have plenty
of chances to visit

58
00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:21,792
now that John and I are, well...

59
00:03:21,960 --> 00:03:23,712
Yeah, we are, aren't we?

60
00:03:23,880 --> 00:03:25,598
[CHUCKLES]

61
00:03:28,600 --> 00:03:30,909
Sorry about what I said.
I didn't know you were standing...

62
00:03:31,120 --> 00:03:32,678
Hey, radar, she left.

63
00:03:33,960 --> 00:03:35,598
Megan, Megan. Um...

64
00:03:35,760 --> 00:03:39,070
Wasn't that your old girlfriend
from college, the married one?

65
00:03:39,280 --> 00:03:41,111
Oh, put the tablets down, Moses.

66
00:03:41,320 --> 00:03:43,276
She's not married anymore.

67
00:03:43,480 --> 00:03:46,631
She left her husband
and she came to be with me.

68
00:03:46,840 --> 00:03:49,354
That must have been
one bad marriage.

69
00:03:52,080 --> 00:03:53,115
You know something?

70
00:03:53,280 --> 00:03:56,113
I'm in such a good mood,
I'm gonna let that one pass.

71
00:03:56,320 --> 00:03:57,469
You know, do me a favour.

72
00:03:57,640 --> 00:04:00,359
Go outside and come back in bitching
because I don't know who you are.

73
00:04:00,520 --> 00:04:03,671
JAKE: Ha, ha.
- No, no, no. I know that look.

74
00:04:03,880 --> 00:04:05,518
I haven't seen him this happy

75
00:04:05,680 --> 00:04:09,070
since his 6-piece McNuggets
had eight by mistake.

76
00:04:09,240 --> 00:04:10,275
[BECKER CHUCKLES]

77
00:04:10,840 --> 00:04:13,149
Yeah, that was a good day, wasn't it?
Yeah.

78
00:04:13,360 --> 00:04:16,591
Yeah, but this is Megan, you know.
This is...

79
00:04:16,880 --> 00:04:18,791
Yeah, this is better.
This is much better.

80
00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:22,280
See, Megan and I were always
supposed to end up together

81
00:04:22,440 --> 00:04:24,078
and it finally happened.

82
00:04:24,280 --> 00:04:25,838
Wait, she just left her husband?

83
00:04:26,040 --> 00:04:27,109
Yeah, yeah. Why?

84
00:04:27,320 --> 00:04:28,548
Just be careful, John.

85
00:04:28,760 --> 00:04:31,149
She just ended a marriage.
You don't wanna be the rebound guy.

86
00:04:31,320 --> 00:04:32,309
The what?

87
00:04:32,480 --> 00:04:34,914
Whenever a woman
ends a long-term relationship,

88
00:04:35,080 --> 00:04:37,196
she always runs
after the first guy she can find.

89
00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:39,789
And then has mad, passionate,
claw-your-back,

90
00:04:39,960 --> 00:04:42,428
tear-your-hair-out sex with them.

91
00:04:42,600 --> 00:04:45,353
Yeah. I'd sure hate to be that guy.

92
00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:49,109
You guys, I know you guys,
you know, wanna help.

93
00:04:49,280 --> 00:04:51,191
Either that or you're just trying
to make up

94
00:04:51,360 --> 00:04:52,634
for your own loveless lives.

95
00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:55,678
But what you don't understand
is after 30 years,

96
00:04:55,840 --> 00:04:57,512
I'm with the woman of my dreams.

97
00:04:57,680 --> 00:04:58,874
I'm happy.

98
00:04:59,040 --> 00:05:00,598
Deal with it.

99
00:05:01,200 --> 00:05:02,633
Ha. Loveless lives.

100
00:05:02,800 --> 00:05:04,313
Who's he calling loveless?

101
00:05:04,480 --> 00:05:06,755
Jake, I'm taking a <i>Penthouse.</i>

102
00:05:24,400 --> 00:05:25,992
I'm so glad you're here.

103
00:05:26,160 --> 00:05:28,355
You know, I don't hear that a lot.

104
00:05:29,680 --> 00:05:31,875
Boy, this place looks fantastic,
Megan.

105
00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:33,519
Oh, I'm glad you like it.

106
00:05:33,720 --> 00:05:35,199
Sit down.

107
00:05:35,360 --> 00:05:38,477
I hope you like Kung Pao chicken.

108
00:05:38,680 --> 00:05:40,716
Chinese food too?

109
00:05:40,880 --> 00:05:45,908
Boy, add sex and a football game,
this'd be like the best day of my life.

110
00:05:46,400 --> 00:05:47,435
So let's eat.

111
00:05:47,600 --> 00:05:49,397
[PHONE RINGS]

112
00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:54,314
I also got some Chinese beer.
I seem to remember you like that.

113
00:05:54,480 --> 00:05:55,674
Yeah.

114
00:05:55,840 --> 00:05:57,637
[PHONE RINGS]

115
00:06:00,800 --> 00:06:03,712
I think the flavours
really compliment each other.

116
00:06:03,880 --> 00:06:05,677
[PHONE RINGS]

117
00:06:09,360 --> 00:06:14,229
You know, you, uh, keep hanging up
the phone before you answer it.

118
00:06:14,440 --> 00:06:15,634
I know.

119
00:06:15,800 --> 00:06:18,917
Anyway, I decided
against the fried rice because...

120
00:06:19,080 --> 00:06:21,230
You know, you only have one pan.

121
00:06:21,440 --> 00:06:24,398
Listen, Megan, I'm a doctor.
It could be an emergency.

122
00:06:24,600 --> 00:06:27,114
It isn't. It's my ex-husband.

123
00:06:27,880 --> 00:06:29,757
How do you know that
unless you answer it?

124
00:06:29,920 --> 00:06:31,990
[PHONE RINGS]

125
00:06:32,160 --> 00:06:33,559
Fine.

126
00:06:36,160 --> 00:06:38,435
Listen, Russ,
we're not married anymore.

127
00:06:38,640 --> 00:06:40,676
It's over and I'm not coming back.

128
00:06:40,840 --> 00:06:42,671
Hey, you cheated on me.

129
00:06:42,840 --> 00:06:46,276
Don't talk to me about Mike.
He had nothing to do with it.

130
00:06:47,960 --> 00:06:50,155
I guess it was for you.

131
00:06:52,480 --> 00:06:54,277
Oh, hey.

132
00:06:54,680 --> 00:06:56,159
Megan.

133
00:06:56,600 --> 00:06:58,670
Come on, it's okay.

134
00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:01,036
Really. You'll be all right.

135
00:07:01,200 --> 00:07:02,235
Yeah.

136
00:07:02,400 --> 00:07:03,992
Who's Mike?

137
00:07:04,960 --> 00:07:06,791
Oh, God.

138
00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:09,235
I wanted to spare you
all the messy details,

139
00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:11,834
but I guess it's best
to tell you everything.

140
00:07:12,000 --> 00:07:13,069
No, you don't have to.

141
00:07:13,240 --> 00:07:14,798
No, I want to.

142
00:07:14,960 --> 00:07:16,279
I came home early one day

143
00:07:16,440 --> 00:07:20,831
and I found my husband in bed
with some bimbo from his office.

144
00:07:21,040 --> 00:07:23,110
I was hurt. I was confused.

145
00:07:23,640 --> 00:07:28,236
So I went out for a drink,
and, well, that's when I met Mike.

146
00:07:28,400 --> 00:07:30,356
It was just that one night. It...

147
00:07:30,520 --> 00:07:32,431
Well, it was a rebound thing.

148
00:07:32,600 --> 00:07:35,398
Well, you...
I bet you wish I'd never come here.

149
00:07:35,560 --> 00:07:37,516
[MEGAN SNIFFLING]

150
00:07:37,680 --> 00:07:39,830
No, no, no. It's okay.

151
00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:41,513
MEGAN:
Oh.

152
00:07:41,680 --> 00:07:43,079
So you don't hate me?

153
00:07:43,240 --> 00:07:44,514
- Of course not.
- Oh.

154
00:07:44,680 --> 00:07:46,671
Hey, everybody has baggage,
you know.

155
00:07:46,880 --> 00:07:48,074
- Yeah.
- I can live with this.

156
00:07:48,760 --> 00:07:51,149
Oh, thank you for understanding.

157
00:07:51,360 --> 00:07:53,157
Understanding?
I've been married before.

158
00:07:53,320 --> 00:07:55,709
You know, I used to call and hang up
on my ex-wife for years.

159
00:07:55,880 --> 00:07:58,678
- Ha, ha.
- In fact, what time is it in Phoenix?

160
00:07:58,880 --> 00:08:01,075
[BOTH CHUCKLE]

161
00:08:01,240 --> 00:08:04,038
[BOTH MOANING SOFTLY]

162
00:08:05,600 --> 00:08:10,628
You know, I'm, uh...
I'm not hungry anymore. Are you?

163
00:08:11,320 --> 00:08:14,039
Oh, uh, you know,
Kung Pao chicken is my...

164
00:08:14,200 --> 00:08:15,872
Okay.

165
00:08:23,080 --> 00:08:25,469
Sorry I'm late.
I was tied up all morning.

166
00:08:25,680 --> 00:08:27,477
Cool. Me too.

167
00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:30,991
Linda, I wasn't actually tied up.

168
00:08:31,200 --> 00:08:33,509
Oh, then neither was I.

169
00:08:33,720 --> 00:08:35,551
I was with Megan.
We were making arrangements

170
00:08:35,720 --> 00:08:37,517
to send her stuff over.
She's moving in.

171
00:08:37,720 --> 00:08:40,553
Already?
Doesn't that seem a little soon?

172
00:08:40,760 --> 00:08:42,671
You call 30 years soon?

173
00:08:42,840 --> 00:08:45,354
We're finally together.
We've wasted enough time.

174
00:08:45,560 --> 00:08:46,595
And for your information,

175
00:08:46,760 --> 00:08:49,672
I found out last night
that I'm not the rebound guy.

176
00:08:49,840 --> 00:08:51,990
It just so happens
there was someone else before me.

177
00:08:52,160 --> 00:08:53,798
So there.

178
00:08:55,400 --> 00:08:58,472
It's a love story for the ages.

179
00:08:59,200 --> 00:09:00,952
Mr. Peterson,
would you come with me, please?

180
00:09:01,120 --> 00:09:02,633
You know, it is a love...

181
00:09:02,800 --> 00:09:04,631
It is a love story, Linda.

182
00:09:04,800 --> 00:09:07,837
You know, I'll never forget
the first time I, uh, saw Megan.

183
00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:10,833
It was like everyone else
in the room just disappeared.

184
00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:12,149
Funny thing happened...

185
00:09:12,360 --> 00:09:14,749
Excuse me, Dr. Becker,
but I have some filing to do.

186
00:09:14,920 --> 00:09:16,558
Oh, sure.

187
00:09:17,240 --> 00:09:20,710
Like that story under "B" for boring.

188
00:09:27,160 --> 00:09:30,232
Becker, it's been two hours.
How long are you gonna wait for her?

189
00:09:30,400 --> 00:09:31,435
She'll be here.

190
00:09:31,600 --> 00:09:32,828
I don't think she's showing.

191
00:09:33,600 --> 00:09:35,318
Look, she came by the office
this afternoon,

192
00:09:35,480 --> 00:09:37,391
I gave her my credit card
so she could go shopping

193
00:09:37,560 --> 00:09:39,312
and we agreed
to meet back here at 6.

194
00:09:39,520 --> 00:09:40,839
It's 8.

195
00:09:42,320 --> 00:09:44,470
Well, you know, so she got delayed.
Big deal.

196
00:09:44,680 --> 00:09:45,715
Do you believe this?

197
00:09:45,920 --> 00:09:47,831
I still can't believe
he released his credit card

198
00:09:48,000 --> 00:09:50,150
from its calfskin prison.

199
00:09:50,840 --> 00:09:53,229
- Shut up, will you?
REGGIE: Becker, think about it.

200
00:09:53,440 --> 00:09:55,749
She shows up in the middle
of the night, moves right in,

201
00:09:55,920 --> 00:09:57,319
and now she's borrowing money.

202
00:09:57,480 --> 00:10:00,631
- She sounds a little flaky to me.
- Oh, come on, Reggie, would you?

203
00:10:00,840 --> 00:10:02,796
[PHONE RINGS]

204
00:10:02,960 --> 00:10:04,552
Hello?

205
00:10:05,040 --> 00:10:06,075
Hold on.

206
00:10:06,240 --> 00:10:07,468
It's her.

207
00:10:07,680 --> 00:10:09,033
Megan?

208
00:10:09,200 --> 00:10:10,758
Yeah. Uh-huh.

209
00:10:10,960 --> 00:10:12,552
Give me that. Uh-huh.

210
00:10:12,920 --> 00:10:14,069
Uh-huh. Right.

211
00:10:14,240 --> 00:10:16,037
Yeah, no problem. Bye-bye.

212
00:10:16,880 --> 00:10:18,916
See?
Perfectly reasonable explanation.

213
00:10:19,120 --> 00:10:20,155
So where is she?

214
00:10:20,320 --> 00:10:22,629
Locked in a bathroom
off the New Jersey Turnpike.

215
00:10:22,840 --> 00:10:24,592
So there.

216
00:10:33,720 --> 00:10:36,518
- Oh, I'm sorry I hit you.
- Oh, that's all right.

217
00:10:36,680 --> 00:10:37,749
I thought you were Dave.

218
00:10:37,920 --> 00:10:40,229
It was an accident.
I'm sorry I snuck up on you.

219
00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:41,674
[SIGHS]

220
00:10:42,520 --> 00:10:44,272
Who's Dave?

221
00:10:45,240 --> 00:10:48,152
Um, he's the guy whose car
I was returning.

222
00:10:48,320 --> 00:10:49,958
Look, let's just forget it.

223
00:10:50,120 --> 00:10:52,588
I don't want to get you involved
in any of this.

224
00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:55,439
Megan, I only have partial vision
in my left eye.

225
00:10:55,600 --> 00:10:57,556
I'm already involved.

226
00:10:57,760 --> 00:10:59,910
Okay, you're right.

227
00:11:00,080 --> 00:11:03,675
Dave was the guy I lived with
after Russ and I split up.

228
00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:05,438
I thought that was Mike.

229
00:11:05,640 --> 00:11:08,996
No, no, no. I never lived with Mike.
I lived with Dave.

230
00:11:09,160 --> 00:11:10,513
Well, for how long?

231
00:11:10,720 --> 00:11:12,870
Oh, not long.
Only about three months.

232
00:11:13,320 --> 00:11:14,878
Three months?

233
00:11:15,040 --> 00:11:16,996
But I thought you came
straight to me.

234
00:11:17,200 --> 00:11:20,749
No. I didn't know where to go
or what to do.

235
00:11:20,920 --> 00:11:23,070
I mean, Dave meant nothing to me.

236
00:11:23,240 --> 00:11:26,835
Huh. Don't you just love
those little convertibles?

237
00:11:27,960 --> 00:11:30,155
- Oh.
- So...

238
00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:33,876
If you lived together, that means
you slept with Dave, right?

239
00:11:34,080 --> 00:11:36,116
Oh, it was a cry for help.

240
00:11:36,320 --> 00:11:38,390
Well, did you ever think
of just saying help?

241
00:11:38,560 --> 00:11:40,676
Oh, God, I'm ruining everything.

242
00:11:40,840 --> 00:11:42,512
You hate me now, don't you?

243
00:11:42,720 --> 00:11:43,914
No, no, l...

244
00:11:44,080 --> 00:11:46,913
Oh, no, I'm sorry. L...

245
00:11:47,440 --> 00:11:48,475
[SIGHS]

246
00:11:48,640 --> 00:11:51,950
Hey, everybody has baggage.

247
00:11:52,120 --> 00:11:53,872
I can live with this.

248
00:11:54,040 --> 00:11:55,996
- John?
- Hmm.

249
00:11:56,160 --> 00:11:58,151
What do you say we take that exit?

250
00:11:58,320 --> 00:11:59,799
Holiday Inn?

251
00:11:59,960 --> 00:12:01,678
Oh, yeah, I love the way you think.

252
00:12:01,840 --> 00:12:03,159
No, Dave's following us.

253
00:12:03,320 --> 00:12:05,595
Pull off, get on the access road
and kill the lights.

254
00:12:05,800 --> 00:12:07,631
- What?
- Now, damn it! Now!

255
00:12:07,840 --> 00:12:09,831
[TYRES SCREECHING]

256
00:12:16,040 --> 00:12:18,076
Okay,
so, what do we got this morning?

257
00:12:18,240 --> 00:12:19,798
What happened to your eye?

258
00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:22,195
What? Oh, how. Ha, funny story.

259
00:12:22,360 --> 00:12:24,669
Uh, Megan mistook me
for somebody else

260
00:12:24,840 --> 00:12:27,229
and accidentally punched me
in the face. Ha, ha.

261
00:12:28,720 --> 00:12:29,835
[CHUCKLING]

262
00:12:32,120 --> 00:12:33,951
Oh, that is funny. Ha-ha-ha.

263
00:12:35,440 --> 00:12:36,668
- John.
- Hmm.

264
00:12:37,400 --> 00:12:40,278
Well, l...
You're not gonna believe this.

265
00:12:40,440 --> 00:12:42,192
Megan borrowed a car from this guy.

266
00:12:42,360 --> 00:12:43,395
Then all of a sudden,

267
00:12:43,560 --> 00:12:46,552
he demands she bring it back to him
all the way in New Jersey.

268
00:12:46,720 --> 00:12:48,711
When she gets there,
he starts hassling her.

269
00:12:48,880 --> 00:12:50,313
She gets scared and runs

270
00:12:50,480 --> 00:12:52,471
and hides in a bathroom
at this gas station

271
00:12:52,640 --> 00:12:53,675
right off the turnpike.

272
00:12:53,880 --> 00:12:55,836
John,
I know it's none of my business,

273
00:12:56,000 --> 00:12:57,956
but this Megan sounds like trouble.

274
00:12:58,160 --> 00:13:00,435
Oh, come on.
So she has a little baggage.

275
00:13:00,640 --> 00:13:04,838
Baggage?
She's like a carousel at JFK.

276
00:13:06,200 --> 00:13:08,077
Hey, you know, I don't...

277
00:13:08,240 --> 00:13:09,434
I don't care what she says.

278
00:13:09,600 --> 00:13:11,192
I've waited a long time
to be with Megan.

279
00:13:11,360 --> 00:13:14,636
I think I can wait a little longer for her
to, you know, straighten her life.

280
00:13:14,800 --> 00:13:16,153
- Let me ask you something.
- Yeah.

281
00:13:16,360 --> 00:13:18,078
Do you think she'd mind
waiting for you?

282
00:13:18,280 --> 00:13:20,430
You know something, Linda,
I don't think so.

283
00:13:20,640 --> 00:13:23,996
Oh, good. Because she's been
in your office for, like, 20 minutes.

284
00:13:24,920 --> 00:13:26,558
Why didn't you say something?

285
00:13:26,760 --> 00:13:31,515
You know, I could lie to you,
but the truth is, I totally spaced.

286
00:13:35,160 --> 00:13:37,993
Megan, what are you doing here?
I thought you were gonna sleep in.

287
00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:40,760
Oh, I couldn't sleep.
I felt so bad about last night.

288
00:13:40,920 --> 00:13:43,753
I swear, John,
my life usually isn't this crazy.

289
00:13:43,960 --> 00:13:45,996
Thank you again
for being so understanding.

290
00:13:46,160 --> 00:13:48,549
Oh, hey, you thanked me plenty
last night.

291
00:13:48,720 --> 00:13:51,598
In fact, I thought if you thanked me
one more time, I was gonna pass out.

292
00:13:51,760 --> 00:13:53,830
[CHUCKLES]

293
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:55,513
- You are so sweet.
- Hmm.

294
00:13:55,680 --> 00:13:57,671
You know what?
I'm gonna take you to dinner.

295
00:13:57,880 --> 00:13:58,915
Let's go.

296
00:13:59,080 --> 00:14:01,594
But, Megan,
it's 9:30 in the morning.

297
00:14:01,760 --> 00:14:04,069
Oh, ha, ha, where's my head?

298
00:14:04,280 --> 00:14:06,191
- I'll pick you up at 6.
- Great, great.

299
00:14:06,400 --> 00:14:08,311
We'II, uh... We'll go to the diner.

300
00:14:08,520 --> 00:14:11,114
- Oh, do we have to?
- Problem?

301
00:14:11,560 --> 00:14:14,711
Oh, it's just something
about those people.

302
00:14:15,160 --> 00:14:16,752
I'm not trying to change your life,

303
00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:19,554
but I wish you wouldn't
spend time with them.

304
00:14:23,200 --> 00:14:24,792
Why? What's wrong with them?

305
00:14:24,960 --> 00:14:30,637
Well, it's not so much them as her.
Reggie.

306
00:14:30,840 --> 00:14:32,478
I mean, it's kind of sad.

307
00:14:32,640 --> 00:14:34,551
She obviously
has some pathetic delusion

308
00:14:34,720 --> 00:14:37,473
that you're gonna drag her
out of her dreary life.

309
00:14:37,680 --> 00:14:41,559
Drag her where?
Into my dreary life?

310
00:14:42,080 --> 00:14:44,116
Look, you know,
Reggie's not after me.

311
00:14:44,280 --> 00:14:45,554
You know, I think you'd see that

312
00:14:45,720 --> 00:14:47,836
if you spent more time
down at the diner.

313
00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:50,275
I know the atmosphere's not great,
but the food...

314
00:14:50,440 --> 00:14:52,829
- Well, the food's not great either, but...
- Yeah.

315
00:14:53,000 --> 00:14:55,514
But, you know,
if you got to know Reggie...

316
00:14:55,680 --> 00:14:59,593
Well, at least she's better than the food
or the atmosphere, you know.

317
00:15:00,280 --> 00:15:02,316
I'm sorry. Uh.

318
00:15:02,480 --> 00:15:04,516
Maybe I just want you all to myself.

319
00:15:04,680 --> 00:15:07,274
I love you so much,
I just don't wanna lose you.

320
00:15:07,480 --> 00:15:10,836
Boy, that's something else
I don't hear very often. Ha, ha.

321
00:15:16,520 --> 00:15:18,397
[ALL LAUGHING]

322
00:15:18,560 --> 00:15:20,869
Hey, Megan.
I didn't expect to see you here.

323
00:15:21,040 --> 00:15:24,396
Oh, you told me to come over
and get to know your friends, so I did.

324
00:15:24,560 --> 00:15:26,437
You're right. They're terrific.

325
00:15:26,640 --> 00:15:27,789
Even Bob?

326
00:15:27,960 --> 00:15:32,112
Oh, you know, I have a million things
to do before dinner.

327
00:15:34,760 --> 00:15:36,318
[BECKER AND MEGAN
MOAN SOFTLY]

328
00:15:39,360 --> 00:15:40,998
[COLDLY]
Bye, Reggie.

329
00:15:43,200 --> 00:15:44,235
Oh.

330
00:15:44,400 --> 00:15:46,868
Looks like you guys
were having a nice visit there.

331
00:15:47,080 --> 00:15:48,718
Are you kidding? She's nuts.

332
00:15:49,280 --> 00:15:52,238
I don't know what she looks like,
but based on the conversation I heard,

333
00:15:52,400 --> 00:15:56,154
I picture her with pinwheel eyes and
a cuckoo coming out of her forehead.

334
00:15:56,560 --> 00:15:58,790
Wait a second.
What are you guys talking about?

335
00:15:59,000 --> 00:16:00,035
What are we talking about?

336
00:16:00,200 --> 00:16:02,031
She told us about your escapade
in New Jersey.

337
00:16:02,200 --> 00:16:03,872
She made it sound
like it was no big deal.

338
00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:05,149
It was no big deal.

339
00:16:05,360 --> 00:16:06,395
Oh, really?

340
00:16:06,560 --> 00:16:08,232
You usually get hit in the face
on dates?

341
00:16:08,440 --> 00:16:09,919
Bob does.

342
00:16:11,640 --> 00:16:12,709
It was an accident.

343
00:16:12,920 --> 00:16:14,797
You're really okay with this?

344
00:16:14,960 --> 00:16:17,679
Becker, you started your evening out
at a gas-station bathroom

345
00:16:17,840 --> 00:16:19,876
and ended up
in a high-speed car chase.

346
00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:21,593
What's your point?

347
00:16:22,200 --> 00:16:23,235
JAKE:
The point is, John,

348
00:16:23,400 --> 00:16:25,436
you break up with women
for parting their hair wrong

349
00:16:25,600 --> 00:16:27,238
and you have no problem with this?

350
00:16:27,400 --> 00:16:29,470
Yeah. And that kiss
she just planted on you,

351
00:16:29,640 --> 00:16:31,471
you don't think
that was for my benefit?

352
00:16:31,680 --> 00:16:33,830
Actually,
I thought it was for my benefit.

353
00:16:34,040 --> 00:16:36,952
Well, Bob got a little something
out of it too.

354
00:16:38,400 --> 00:16:39,958
Becker, she looked right at me.

355
00:16:40,120 --> 00:16:42,634
It was her way of saying,
"Keep your hands off my man."

356
00:16:42,800 --> 00:16:44,791
You know something?
I don't have to listen to this.

357
00:16:44,960 --> 00:16:46,393
I come in here,
morning after morning

358
00:16:46,560 --> 00:16:49,120
and listen to you tell me
I don't know how to enjoy my life.

359
00:16:49,280 --> 00:16:51,236
And the minute I do,
you can't stand it.

360
00:16:51,440 --> 00:16:53,192
- Becker...
- No. Think about it.

361
00:16:53,360 --> 00:16:56,079
Has she lied to me? No.
Has she stolen from me? No.

362
00:16:56,240 --> 00:16:58,196
Has she hurt me? No.

363
00:16:58,400 --> 00:16:59,515
Have you really asked her to?

364
00:16:59,680 --> 00:17:02,148
Because chicks can be
kind of shy about that stuff.

365
00:17:11,600 --> 00:17:13,158
Megan?

366
00:17:17,200 --> 00:17:18,599
[SIGHS]

367
00:17:20,360 --> 00:17:21,429
[ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS]

368
00:17:21,600 --> 00:17:23,192
MAN 1 [ON MACHINE]:
<i>Megan, it's Alonso.</i>

369
00:17:23,360 --> 00:17:25,828
<i>I know you're there.</i>
<i>All right. Fine, don't answer.</i>

370
00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:27,911
<i>But I want my money back, damn it.</i>

371
00:17:28,080 --> 00:17:29,115
[ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS]

372
00:17:29,280 --> 00:17:31,589
MAN 2 [ON MACHINE]:
<i>Megan, it's lan. My wife's out of town.</i>

373
00:17:31,760 --> 00:17:33,432
<i>Any chance of us</i>
<i>getting together again?</i>

374
00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:34,919
[ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS]

375
00:17:35,080 --> 00:17:38,152
WOMAN [ON MACHINE]: <i>Dr. Becker,</i>
<i>it's Debbie at Concord Savings.</i>

376
00:17:38,320 --> 00:17:41,039
<i>There's been some unusual activity</i>
<i>on your credit card.</i>

377
00:17:41,200 --> 00:17:43,430
<i>Please call me at Extension 438.</i>

378
00:17:43,600 --> 00:17:44,635
[ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS]

379
00:17:44,800 --> 00:17:45,835
What, what?

380
00:17:46,000 --> 00:17:48,673
MAN 3 [ON MACHINE]: <i>Hello, Meg?</i>
<i>Tim. You know, from yesterday.</i>

381
00:17:48,840 --> 00:17:50,398
<i>Call me.</i>

382
00:17:51,120 --> 00:17:53,554
Someone's a bad boy.

383
00:17:53,720 --> 00:17:55,915
Listening to other people's
messages.

384
00:17:56,120 --> 00:17:58,634
No. It's my apartment.

385
00:17:58,840 --> 00:18:00,876
Oh, that's right. Everything's yours.

386
00:18:01,040 --> 00:18:02,871
Your apartment, your telephone.

387
00:18:03,040 --> 00:18:06,112
Well, by the way,
you're out of Wild Turkey.

388
00:18:06,400 --> 00:18:08,675
Megan, what's going on here?

389
00:18:08,840 --> 00:18:11,479
Did you buy all that stuff
with my credit card?

390
00:18:11,680 --> 00:18:13,910
Who was it, John?
Who turned you against me?

391
00:18:14,080 --> 00:18:15,593
Was it your whore at the diner?

392
00:18:16,440 --> 00:18:19,716
My whore at the diner
had nothing to do with this.

393
00:18:19,880 --> 00:18:21,233
She's not a whore, Megan.

394
00:18:21,400 --> 00:18:23,391
Look, I don't... Who are those guys?

395
00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:25,869
I just wanna know what's going on.

396
00:18:26,080 --> 00:18:27,115
[SIGHS]

397
00:18:27,280 --> 00:18:29,396
Oh, all right, fine.

398
00:18:29,560 --> 00:18:32,677
If it will stop this insane third degree,
I'll tell you everything.

399
00:18:32,840 --> 00:18:36,196
- What?
- You know about Russ and Mike.

400
00:18:36,360 --> 00:18:39,352
And for the record,
I had no idea Mike was 16.

401
00:18:39,560 --> 00:18:40,709
Six...

402
00:18:40,920 --> 00:18:41,955
Then I met lan.

403
00:18:42,120 --> 00:18:44,475
He was hitching a ride
and what can I say, it was a mistake.

404
00:18:44,640 --> 00:18:46,358
Not as big a mistake
as Dave or Alonso,

405
00:18:46,520 --> 00:18:47,748
but that's a whole other story.

406
00:18:47,920 --> 00:18:48,955
Which brings us to Tim.

407
00:18:49,120 --> 00:18:50,712
I wanted to sleep with him,
but I didn't.

408
00:18:50,880 --> 00:18:52,029
You're welcome.

409
00:18:52,200 --> 00:18:55,112
That's it. That's everything, okay?

410
00:18:58,240 --> 00:19:00,310
Hey, everybody has baggage.

411
00:19:05,240 --> 00:19:07,834
Oh, wait a minute.
Nobody has that much baggage.

412
00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:11,197
Look,
we really need to talk about this.

413
00:19:11,360 --> 00:19:12,952
All right,
but first thing in the morning

414
00:19:13,120 --> 00:19:15,759
we're gonna really talk about this.

415
00:19:25,960 --> 00:19:27,712
So when I woke up this morning,

416
00:19:27,920 --> 00:19:33,950
she was gone, her stuff was gone,
and a lot of my stuff was gone.

417
00:19:34,400 --> 00:19:35,719
Sorry, man.

418
00:19:35,880 --> 00:19:37,677
Yeah, I wish we had been wrong.

419
00:19:38,360 --> 00:19:41,670
I just can't believe I let her make
such an ass out of me, you know.

420
00:19:41,840 --> 00:19:44,035
I mean, damn it.
She was my fantasy.

421
00:19:44,200 --> 00:19:46,998
You know, for years, I had all these
screwed-up relationships,

422
00:19:47,160 --> 00:19:49,799
but in a funny way, it didn't matter
because in the back of my mind

423
00:19:49,960 --> 00:19:54,909
I always hoped that I'd meet
Megan again and we'd be together.

424
00:19:55,560 --> 00:19:58,472
Well, you know what they say.
It's better to have loved and lost...

425
00:19:58,680 --> 00:20:01,069
Better to have loved and lost?
Oh, come on, Reggie.

426
00:20:01,240 --> 00:20:03,390
Your encouragement's
as bland as your food.

427
00:20:03,600 --> 00:20:06,478
You know, it would've been better
if she hadn't shown up at all.

428
00:20:06,680 --> 00:20:08,989
Now I've got nothing.

429
00:20:09,760 --> 00:20:12,069
I've lost her and my fantasy.

430
00:20:12,280 --> 00:20:14,271
Look at it this way, John.

431
00:20:14,440 --> 00:20:17,512
A lot of guys don't ever get to be
with a woman like Megan.

432
00:20:18,320 --> 00:20:19,753
And a lot of guys do.