英格蘭北部
餐廳
能給我來一份早餐嗎 Can I have some breakfast please?
一杯咖啡加一個培根三明治共3鎊 It's 3 quid for a cup of coffee and a bacon sandwich.
如果要加熱的話 得另外加10鎊 And obviously if you want it heated up it is another tenner.
好吧 Ok.
是橙紅色的這個錢 對吧 That's the orange ones, right?
停車費要再加10鎊 And it's another tenner to park your jeep.
沒問題 Of course.
給 There you go.
搞什么啊 小可愛 你要知道他這是在... Excuse me, love. You do realise that he's taking the...
你何不去洗手間呢 曼迪 Why don't you go to the bathroom, Mandy?
用大鏡子來化妝 Use the big mirror - eh?
就算給豬涂上口紅 也還是豬 You can put lipstick on a pig, man. It's still a pig.
行了行了 滾你媽的 Yeah! Yeah! Fuck Off!
我可以用下你的洗手間嗎 May I use your bathroom?
當然可以 親愛的 Of course you can, darling.
10鎊 Ten pounds.
有什么事嗎 Can I help?
你為什么要替一個對你說話那么無禮的人工作 Why do you work for a man who speaks to you like that?
我也不知道 親愛的 No idea darling.
可能跟我嫁給那個混蛋的原因一樣 It's probably the same reason that I married the bastard.
你為什么還不跟一個不愛你的男人離婚 Why do you stay married to a man who doesn't love you?
你好古怪啊 You are weird.
你是外國人嗎 聽口音不像啊 You foreign or something? You don't sound foreign.
算是吧 Sort of.
能給我用一點嗎 Can I have some of that?
拿去吧 親愛的 反正也是便宜貨 Just have the lot, darling. It is cheap shit anyway.
聽著 我丈夫剛剛騙取了你的錢財 And listen. That fellow of mine just stole from you.
你知道這點 對吧 You do know that, don't you?
你有時候可以當個混蛋 卡爾 你知道... You can be a right arsehole sometimes, Carl. You know that...
我操啊 The fuck...
豬哼哼
停下 Stop
一切都還好吧 Is everything okay?
不 不好 Not really, no.
你忘拿你的培根三明治了 You forgot your bacon sarnie.
不用了 曼迪 That's okay,
我今天遇到的豬夠多了 不用吃豬肉了 Mandy. I've had enough pig for one day.
天吶 一下子戳進我眼睛里了 God. Got me right in the eye.
那個... You know what,
如果你不介意 還是把三明治給我吧 if it is alright with you I will have that sandwich.
只是 我剛突然想到關于豬的這句妙語 It just... the pig line just came to me
我就脫口而出了 但我實際上快餓死了 and I just kinda rolled with it but I really am quite starving
所以太感謝你了 你真是個大好人 so thanks so much. That's really nice of you.
回頭見 See you.
車得預熱一下 just warming the old girl up.
現在可以走了 Here we go....
兩周亡命記
第一季 第一集
南海岸
酒吧
我的意思就是 All I am saying is that,
你向來都不擅長跟女人相處 you have never been very good with women.
那跟這事有什么關系 What has that got to do with anything?
你剛剛被甩了啊 小子 Well, you have just been dumped, kid.
是啊 被跟我交往了三年的人甩了 Yeah, by someone I went out with for three years.
我不是要說你 兄弟 I'm not having a go, mate.
我只是想說 在女人這方面 I'm just saying when it comes to girls
你一直都像是出水的鴨子 you have always been a duck out of water.
什么 也就說完全沒事嗎 What...So completely fine then?
鴨子是水陸兩棲的 杰 Ducks are amphibious, Jay,
所以無論是在水中還是出了水 它們都完全沒事 so they are completely fine in or out of water.
胡扯八道 Bullshit!
什么叫胡扯八道 What do you mean bullshit?
我指的就是你這個問題 兄弟 This is what I am talking about, bro.
沒人在乎你上知天文下知地理的各種屁話 No one cares about all of your univers-y bullshit.
那是二年級學的 杰 We literally learnt that in year 2, Jay.
都算不上是初中知識 That's not even junior school.
好吧 聽著 重點是 OK, look. The point is
不管你覺得你有多聰明 no matter how clever you think you are
都不會有什么進展的 因為... you are never gonna get anywhere, cause...
-你穿的衣服太丑了 -好吧 - you got shit clothes. - Right!
-發型也很傻逼 -好吧 - A shit haircut. - Ok.
而且雞巴就跟破了的氣球一樣小 And...a dick like a burst balloon.
我的陰莖尺寸是達到平均水平的 杰 I've got a perfectly average sized penis, Jay.
-好吧 你想忘掉艾麗嗎 -不太想 - OK. Do you wanna get over Ellie? - Not really.
-你想證明你是個男子漢嗎 -顯然不想 - Do you wanna prove that you are a big man? - Obviously not.
好吧 那你必須找 OK then, you have to speak
下一個走進這酒吧的女人搭話 to the next woman that walks in this pub.
不管那人是誰 Whoever they are.
你剛說的兩點我都已經明確說不想了 I literally said no to both those things.
嘿 你想讓我說出來嗎 Hey, do you want me to say it?
不想 No!
-我還是要... -別 - I'm gonna... - Don't.
-我要說出來 -別說 - I will say it. - Don't say it.
-我就要說出來 -求你不要 - I shall say it. - Please don't.
-我反正要說出來 -我希望你不要 - I'm gonna say it. - I rather you didn't.
你是我弟弟 并且... You are my little brother... and...
我 愛 你 I love yooouu!
我希望你找點樂子 好嗎 And I want you to have some fun. Alright?
不 這事不是沒得商量 No! This is not non negotiable.
你是想說"沒得商量"吧 You mean it is, non negotiable.
什么 What?
當我沒說 Don't worry.
弟弟 快看 Little brother - look...
歡迎我的朋友見到夢中女孩 Welcome my friend to the woman of my dreams.
真的很抱歉 I am so sorry.
我去吧臺給你再買一杯 I will get you another one. at... the bar.
抱歉 抱歉 Ooohh, sorry. Sorry.
你沒事吧 You alright?
-能給我一杯蘋果酒嗎 -好的 - Can I have a glass of cider? - Sure.
再給我身后憤怒地盯著我的那人上一杯他之前點的 And..whatever the angry looking man behind me was drinking.
謝謝 Thank you.
我能問你點事嗎 Can I ask you something?
當然 快問吧 小伙伴 Yes. Yeah - fire away, amigo.
不是小伙伴 就朋友 Not amigo. Just friend.
并不是說我們就成朋友了 Not that we're friends.
盡管人們都說陌生人只是你尚未認識的朋友 Although they do say a stranger is a friend you haven't met yet.
我們剛剛已經見過了 算認識了吧 We have technically met, haven't we?
我覺得這主要看怎么定義了 就像是... I consider it sort of depends on definition, so like...
抱歉 你剛剛說有事要問我 Sorry, you had a question.
是的 Yes.
這是鞋子 沒錯吧 This is definitely a shoe, right?
是的 Yeahh...
我是說 我就是覺得 I mean, I just...I feel like
我好像犯了個大錯 there has been some sort of a fundamental mistake.
這里除了我 似乎沒人穿這種鞋 I mean... ...no one else seems to be wearing them.
是啊 Right.
抱歉 我以前從來沒打扮得這么時髦過 Sorry, It's just that I never really dress up this smart before
我覺得有點... and I'm feeling a bit...
不不不 我懂 那就像... Yeah. No no no. Completely. That's...
就跟電影《窈窕美眉》里一樣 It's the same for the one in 'She's all that'
瞧瞧那最后的結局 and look what happened there.
最后結局發生了什么 What did happen there?
電影一開始的時候 大家都說 Oh, at the start of the film everyone's like
"她就是個丑八怪" 'she's a gnome"
到結尾的時候 她穿上一件非常漂亮的裙子 and then she pops this dress on by the end
大家都激動得不行 因為他們開始覺得 and then everyone's kicking themselves, cause they are like
"原來她一直就不是丑八怪啊" "Ahh, turned out that she wasn't that all along."
那是部經典影片 你一定要看 It's a classic. You've gotta watch it.
好的 Ok.
我會加入事項清單的 I put it on my list.
在現實世界里 要做的事項
45:打贏劍斗 46:玩空手道 踢碎木板 47:看電影《窈窕美眉》
蘇格蘭
哇 所以這是他們第一次約會時拍的嗎 Wow, so this was taken on their first date?
是啊 所以我才希望人生進的第一家酒吧是這里 Yeah, that's wanted this place to be my first pub.
我想著 能跟爸爸一起在這里喝一杯會很美好 I thought it would be nice to come for a drink here with dad.
所以他要過來嗎 Oh, is he coming down?
算是吧 Oh, sort of.
你就靠在他身上呢 You are leaning on him.
天吶 真是太對不起了 Oh God! I'm so...I'm so sorry.
*天吶 我... Oh, my God, I...
你不必對他道歉 他已經死了 You don't need to apologise to him. He's dead.
他聽不到你說話 He can't hear you.
你想問我 對吧 You want to ask me, don't you?
問你什么 Ask you?
為什么這是我第一次來酒吧 Why this is my first time in a pub.
為什么穿著這樣的鞋 Or in those shoes.
或者為什么我這輩子唯一看過的四部電影 Or why the only 4 films I have seen in my life
是《終結者2》 《肖申克的救贖》 are Terminator 2, Shawshank Redemption,
《小鬼當家2》和《勇敢的心》 Home Alone 2 and Braveheart.
是啊 我是挺想問的 Yeahhh. You know, I do actually.
恐怕我有壞消息要告訴你 尼克 I am afraid I've got some bad news, Nicky.
金 Kim?
等你有空時把內臟取出來一下 輪到你干了 It's your turn to disembowel dinner when you got a sec.
金 Kim?
親愛的媽媽 Dear Mum
很抱歉這樣離開 I'm sorry for leaving,
但我知道你肯定會阻止我的 but I knew that you would try and stop me.
事實是 The thing is...
我終于覺得準備好嘗試新事物了 I finally feel ready to try new things.
探索外面的世界有什么在等著我 Work out what's out there for me.
替爸爸 報仇雪恨 And make things right...for Dad.
也是為了我們大家 For all of us.
我已經不是小女孩了 I'm not a little belle anymore.
我可以照顧好自己 媽 I can look after myself, Mom.
現實世界是個令人恐懼的地方 The world is a scary place.
但就像他為我的21歲生日 But it is just like he said
寫的那首美麗的詩里所說的 in that beautiful poem he wrote for my 21ˢᵗ birthday.
"我還有漫長的人生要探索 "I've got all my life to live."
我心中有滿滿的愛要奉獻 "And all my love to give."
只要我還知道如何去愛 "And as long as I know how to love."
我就知道我會永遠活著" ‎"I know I will stay alive."
我會活下來的 媽 'I will survive, Mum.'
愛你的 金 Love, Kim
問清楚一下 明天就是世界末日嗎 So just to be clear - the end of the world is coming tomorrow?
不 我的意思是可能是明天 No. I am saying it could be tomorrow,
但等到末日真的到來時 but when it does happen
逃離現代生活越遠 就越可能活下來 the more off grid you are, the better chance you'll have.
所以世界末日會以什么形式發生呢 So, how is that gonna happen?
可能是核戰吧 Nuclear war. Probably.
但也可能是人工智能 But it could be artificial intelligence.
兩極冰蓋融化 Polar ice caps melting.
下一次魚麻疹病的爆發可能會讓全人類滅亡 The next outbreak of fish measles could wipe us out entirely.
不好意思 魚什么... I'm sorry? Fish...
我媽總是說人類的決定性特征就是耐心 My mum always said the defining feature of humanity is in patience.
即便是在面對自身的滅亡時 Even for it's own destruction.
我們的媽媽總是說吃一個烤奶酪三明治總覺得不夠 Our mum always says one cheese toastie is never enough
但吃兩個又太撐了 but two is always too much.
你現在取笑我 You are only making fun of me
是因為政府掩蓋了情況的嚴重性 because the government is hiding how bad it truly is.
如果你知道... If you had any idea...
不不 我站在你這邊 No, no. I am on your side, bro.
別相信他們的謊言 真的 Don't believe their lies, man. Like yeah guys.
不如我們登上宇宙飛船 飛向月球吧 Shall we just get on a spaceship and go to the moon.
說得好聽 不過跟叨叨我相比算是巨大的進步了 As if, man. One giant leap for fucking bullshit me.
好吧 金 你說這些都是你媽告訴你的 Okay. All right. So Kim, you said your mom told you all this.
你是覺得我們錯了嗎 You think we're wrong then?
沒有 我的意思是 Well no. I'm just saying.
就算我們注定要毀滅 I think even if we are all fucked,
我寧愿冒險在現實世界里求生 I'd rather take my chances in the real world,
也不要躲在荒山野嶺的洞穴里 than hide out in the middle of nowhere in a cave.
是個小木屋 睡洞穴這種情況 It's a hut. My mum only makes me sleep in the cave
只要在那個禿頭男上我們家修發電機時才會發生 when the bald man comes to fix the generator.
天 那個發電機壞得頻率也太高了 Yeah, that thing breaks down a lot.
什么意思 What does that mean?
我有個好玩的主意 假如世界末日真的要來臨了 Okay, fun thought. Let's say it is the end of the world
我們只能活兩周了 你們會做什么 and we will have two weeks to live. What would you do?
很簡單 我要在過山車上娶我的女朋友 Easy. I'd marry my girlfriend on like a roller coaster or something.
很好 Nice.
尼克 Nicky?
我要體驗各種疼痛 探尋自然的神奇之處 I would ride a lot of pain. Seek out the majesty of nature.
當真嗎 Oh really?
假的 我要狂吃甜甜圈 找人做愛 Nah. I'd eat donuts and try to have sex with people.
很好 因為如果沒人愿意跟你做愛 That's good, because if no one wanted to have sex with you,
你就可以插甜甜圈了 then you could just use the donuts.
我也是這么想的 That was my thinking exactly.
好吧 金 那你呢 Alright. Go on Kim, what about you?
我覺得性愛和甜甜圈不錯 Sex and donuts sounds good to me.
那就這樣吧 沖向世界末日 Well, there we are guys. To the end of the world, baby.
我和艾麗在一起三年了 Me and Ellie have been together three years.
在大學認識的 Met at uni.
你也知道典型的結局 You know how it goes.
我猜是你們雙方共同決定分手的 I guess it was a mutual then?
的確是 It was actually.
是她和她的新男友共同決定跟我分手的 It was a mutual decision between her and her new boyfriend.
你不需要吃「污染藥」嗎 Don't you have to take your pollution pill?
什么 What?
大概你有免疫力吧 You are immunised, I guess.
我猜這些藥是你媽給你的吧 Did your mom give you those by any chance?
是啊 Yeah.
真不敢相信這是你第一次踏入文明世界 I can't believe this your first trip into civilisation.
有生以來第一次 Like... ...ever.
但我曾經采購過幾次物資 Well, I did the supply run a few times.
但也就是進去就出來了 所以... But I guess that's just in and out so...
你這次為什么決定離開 And why did you decide to leave now?
我沒有離開 I haven't left.
我還是要回去的 I'm going back.
就覺得現在是時候... Just felt like now is a good time to
劃掉我清單上的一些事項吧 cross some things off my list... I guess.
你和杰很不一樣嗎 You and Jay are quite different then?
我們很小的時候 爸爸就去世了 My dad died when we were kids.
所以我們只能相依為命了 So that's all... for us together.
抱歉 I'm so sorry.
我現在覺得好難過 I feel bad now.
沒事 That's alright.
我爸爸以前是做綠化生意的 He had this landscaping business.
我和杰 一直打算要... And me and Jay, we've always had this plan to
重振那個生意 resurrect it.
但你其實并不想嗎 But you don't want to?
我在大學是念英語文學的 I studied English at Uni.
我得到一個在倫敦實習的機會 I've been offered this internship in London.
那會讓他心碎的 It's going to break his heart.
頭條: 世界末日兩周后降臨
你爸爸是怎么死的 So, how did your dad die?
心臟病發作 Heart attack.
你爸呢 Yours?
也一樣 Yes, same.
他在我6歲時去世了 He died when I was six.
那算是當初媽媽帶著我離開的原因吧 It's kind of the reason why me and mom left in the first place.
說來也有趣 It's funny.
我爸爸去世跟我的小表弟出生的日子是同一天 My dad died the exact same day my little cousin was born.
我們趕到醫院時從我阿姨身邊沖過去了 We've moved past my aunt in the hospital.
就好像世界上的愛被允許存在的量是有限的 It's like there's a finite amount of love allowed in the world.
他充滿額外的愛 He's added.
不得不騰出空間來接受新的愛啊 And you got a pour bit out to make room for the next bit.
二位 Guys!
天吶 快過來 Oh my God! Come quick!
你們肯定覺得難以置信 趕快過來吧 You're not gonna believe this. You guys need to come right now.
金 你媽說得對 世界末日真的要來了 Kim, your mom was right. It is is happening.
天吶 真的要發生了 Dude, it is fucking happening.
世界末日兩周后降臨
但是沒關系 因為我在廚房找到一些甜甜圈 But it's okay, because I found some donuts in the kitchen.
我的天吶 Oh my God!
這是實時發生的情況嗎 Is this is happening right now?
要怎么停止啊 How does it stop?
金 才沒有... Kim, there isn't any...
氯洗雞肉 Chlorinated chicken
和.. and....
氣候變化 climate change.
結合在一起 Combined.
好了 我們得聯系世界衛生組織 OK, One of us needs to call the WHO.
-誰[拼寫一致] -就是啊 - The who? - Exactly.
-什么 -算了 我得走了 - What? - Oh, never mind, I need to go.
-等等 -我真的不敢相信 - Hold on a sec. - I just don't believe it.
從小到大都認為 You spend your whole life thinking
世界將于眨眼間灰飛煙滅 world's gonna end in the blink of an eye
然后突然間就成真了 and then suddenly it is.
等等 別擔心 其實并沒有... Hold on two seconds. Don't worry, there is nothing actually..
尼克 這情況可太嚴重了 Nicky, this is such a serious situation.
其實并沒有什么 There's nothing actually what?
其實并沒有... There is nothing actually...
其實我們并沒有任何辦法改變 That we can do right now.
你說得對 You're right.
這一點都不好笑 This isn't funny.
這孩子簡直瘋了 Kid's fucking insane!
杰 Jay!
就是個玩笑而已 畢竟我們剛聊到了性愛 It is just a little joke because the whole sex,
甜甜圈和世界末日什么的 donut and end of the world thing.
我沒想到她真的會信 I didn't think she would actually believe it.
金 Kim!
快上車 Get in the car.
別擔心 爸 Don't worry, dad.
吉米家
時間足夠了 There's enough time.
她要去哪兒啊 Where the hell is she going, anyway?
閉嘴 跟著她就行 Just shut up and follow her.
收割谷
金 Kim!
我不敢相信她竟然真的信了 I can't believe she actually fell for it.
她可能以前從來沒見過網絡 She's probably never seen the internet before.
她當然會信了 Of course she fell for it.
那她開車來這里的路上怎么沒反應過來 Why didn't she realise on the drive over?
因為現在是深更半夜的 Because it's the middle of the night,
就算末日是真的 大家都睡著了也看不到 even if it was true, no fucker would be awake to see it.
別再擔心了 老兄 Stop worrying, man.
聽著 不管她進去見到誰 Look, whoever she's gone in there to see
都會告訴她這是個玩笑 然后就解決了 will tell her that it is a joke and that's that.
有什么問題啊 What's the problem?
我之前有機會解釋 但我卻什么都沒說 I had chance to say something and I didn't.
她一定會覺得我是個大混蛋 She's gonna think I'm a right dick.
就是個小玩笑而已 It was just a little joke.
她會覺得超級好笑的 She's gonna think it's hilarious.
她真會這么覺得嗎 Is she though?
聽著 就算她不這么覺得 Look, if she doesn't,
最糟糕又能發生什么事呢 What is the worst that can happen?
相信我 Trust me.
不會有事的 Everything's gonna be fine.
好吧 或許你說得對 Yeah, I guess you're right.
犯罪頭目吉米·戴維斯被宣告無罪
伊恩 Ian!
是你在樓下干蠢事嗎 Is that you, playing silly buggers downstairs?
伊恩 Ian!
你好 吉米 Hello, Jimmy.
還記得我嗎 Remember me?