翻译: 店小二
校对: 柿子 猴给力
后期: Nico
压制: 猴给力
你俩做什么了 What'd you do?
啥 What?
别跟我装 你俩做什么了 Don't give me that. What'd you do?
什么也没做 Nothing.
妈 我正学习呢 Mom, I'm trying to study.
哦 Oh.
我相信你不介意我 I'm sure you don't mind if I, uh...
看看这吧 took a look in here!
妈 我告诉你了 Mom, I'm telling you.
我们什么都没做 We didn't do anything.
哦 你俩肯定在搞什么鬼 Oh, you boys are up to something.
我能察觉到 I can smell it.
如果你们又打碎了一扇窗的话 If you've broken another window,
这回将从你们的 it is going to come out of your--
你有完没完了啊 Are you done?
你想搜身吗 You want to frisk me?
就算你走运吧 You just consider yourselves lucky...
这次 this time.
差一点啊 That was close.
不是她生疏了 Either she's losing her touch,
就是我们精进了 or we're getting better.
电波诚译
第一季 第二集
马尔柯姆的一家
聪明的好处就是 The good thing about being smart...
我从不用查 is I never have to look up
任何电话号码 any phone numbers.
坏处就是从此家里再没人 The bad thing is no one else in the family...
愿意记任何事了 ever bothers to remember anything.
嘿 Francis 你让我提醒你 Hey, Francis, you told me to remind you...
关于爸妈结婚纪念日的事 about Mom and Dad's anniversary.
好的 什么时候 Ah, great. When is it?
今天 Today.
哥们 你该早点提醒我的 Dude, you're supposed to remind me before...
这样我可以送他们点什么 so that I can get them something.
没关系 我们会在礼物里加上你的名字 That's okay. We'll put your name on their gift.
多谢啊 兄弟 我欠你个人情 Oh, thanks, man. I owe you one.
不 你欠我20美元 No, you owe me $20.
这是你的份子钱 That's what your share comes to.
你给他们买了个80美元礼物吗 You got them an $80 gift?
呃 Uh...
是的 yeah.
哦 Craig Oh, Craig.
结婚纪念日快乐 Happy anniversary.
16载的大好年华都献给了同一个男人 1 6 wonderful years to the same man.
Hal真是个幸运的男人 That Hal is one lucky hombre.
你不必的 Craig, You shouldn't have.
别这样 Oh, please.
一份独特的礼物送给特别的女士 A special gift for a special lady...
在这个特殊的日子里 on a special day.
不 我是说 你真的不用这样 No. I mean, really, you shouldn't have.
不是只有丈夫该送礼物吗 Aren't only husbands supposed to give gifts?
好吧 那就扔到垃圾桶里吧 Fine. Throw it in the trash, then.
等 等 等下 Ho-ho-hold on.
先看看里面有什么 Let's see what it is first.
快看 Oh, look at...
我正打算试试这个颜色呢 I've been meaning to try this color.
我知道 I know.
我几周前看见你盯着它看来的 I saw you eyeing it a couple weeks ago.
我都不知道我们还卖这个牌子啊 I didn't know we carried this brand.
确实不卖 We don't.
那你在哪看到我 So where did you see me...?
今晚有重大的计划吗 So, big plans for tonight?
你会穿什么 What are you going to be wearing?
今晚会非常棒 我有件超漂亮的红裙子 Oh, it's going to be great. I have the most perfect red dress.
我攒了两个月的钱才买来的 Took me two months to save up for it,
但是值了 but it was worth it.
哦 我一直在幻想今晚 Oh, I've been fantasizing about this night forever.
Craig Craig?
呃 好的 这样的 Lois Huh? Yeah, uh, say, Lois,
你 you, uh,
你午饭过后想去看场电影吗 you want to catch a movie or something over lunch?
他们在电子屏幕上放《我最好朋友的婚礼》 They're playing My Best Friend's Wedding over in Electronics.
- 不 谢啦 我 - 好的 算了吧 - No, thanks. I... - Fine. Forget it.
哦 Oof!.
我没事 I'm okay.
你们包完礼物没有 Are you boys almost finished wrapping our present?
我再有十分钟要去 I have to meet your father...
餐厅见你爸爸了 at the restaurant in ten minutes.
再来点纸 More paper.
我要粘蝴蝶结 I get to do the bow.
她为什么给你买礼物的钱 Why'd she give you the money to buy the gift?
因为她不想再收到空手打视频了 Because she didn't want another karate video.
是空手道 It's ka-ra-te.
我要粘蝴蝶结 I get to do the bow.
我们送的是什么啊 What did we get them anyway?
相框 Picture frame.
马屁精 Brownnoser.
我要贴蝴蝶结 I get to do the bow.
我们还没完事呢 We're not finished yet.
知道 但我就是要贴蝴蝶结 Yeah, but I get to do the bow.
搞定了 Finished.
最后一项 Finally.
不 应该我来粘蝴蝶结的 No! I was supposed to do the bow.
那你该早点说的 You should have said something.
我要告状去 I'm telling.
妈妈 Mom!
不好了 No!
着火了 Fire?
烧着了 Fire?
居然玩火 Fire?!
妈妈 怎么了 Mom! What...?
这是你们做过的最没脑子 This is the most stupid, irresponsible,
不靠谱 不要命的事 dangerous thing you have ever done.
你们也想这样吗 Is this what you want?
是不是想让我俩通过牙齿痕迹 Will we have to identify your charred little bodies...
来鉴别你们烧焦了的尸体啊 through their dental records?
干脆点回答我 I want a straight answer.
谁干的 Who did this?
Malcolm干的 Malcolm did it.
- Reese干的 - 不是我做的 Reese did it. - I didn't do it!
不是我做的 I didn't do it!
我们真要去看牙医吗 We're going to the dentist?
谁 Who?
反正我不喜欢那个 I don't like that one anyway.
别 别 这个不行 No. No. Not that one.
*他们不回答我* *They turn me down They turn me down*
*他们转起来 转起来* *They turn, they turn they turn, they turn*
*他们 他们* *They, they they, they, they...*
谁 Who?
不是我 是他 It wasn't me. It was him.
不是 是 No, it was--
好吧 到玄关去 Okay. Into the hallway.
我要吐了 Think I'm going to puke.
是吗 接下来才是今夜的精彩内容 Yeah? Well, it's going to be the highlight of your evening,
没人说出是谁 咱们就哪都别去 because nobody is going anywhere until one of you tells me who.
一切都准备好了吗 Everything's all set up?
我想是的 先生 I believe so, sir.
7号桌 87年的Chateau干红 Table seven? Chateau Brut '87?
开胃菜拼盘吗 Hors d'oeuvres medley?
是的 先生 Yes, sir.
天 还有件事 Oh, geez, one more thing.
差点忘了 I almost forgot.
我妻子总是点龙虾 Uh, my wife always orders lobster,
你们可以让厨师在上菜前 so could you have the chef
把这个套在龙虾的螯上吗 slip this on the lobster's claw just before you serve it?
她看到这个一定会狂喜的 She gets such a kick out of stuff like that.
要是那样的活 我也会很高兴的 And so do I, for that matter.
没问题 先生 Not a problem, sir.
琴师那安排好我们的歌了吗 The violinist has our song?
他今早就接到乐谱了 He received the sheet music this morning.
好的 好的 太好了 Good. Good, good, good, good.
你会很惊讶我们听过多少遍 You would be surprised how many times I've heard...
被糟蹋了的"小丑之泪" ''Tears of a Clown'' just butchered.
快告诉她 Tell her.
你告诉她 You tell her.
谁 Who?
- Malcolm - Reese - Malcolm! - Reese!
再往墙上靠点 Closer to the wall.
慢着 妈 说真的 Wait, Mom. Seriously.
这臭死了 It reeks over here.
我没忍住 I can't help it.
到电视房去 走吧 Into the TV room. Let's go.
*快点 快点* *Come on, come on*
*快点* *Come on...*
如果你告诉妈妈是你干的 我给你五美元 I'll give you five dollars if you tell Mom you did it.
你告诉她吧 You tell her.
你做的 因为不是我做的 You did it, 'cause I didn't do it.
真的不是我 I really didn't.
你在吃什么 What are you eating?
啥也没吃 Nothing.
你们还是闭嘴吧 这样我可以想点办法 Why don't you guys shut up so I can think of something?
有什么好想的 What's there to think of?
我们无计可施 There's nothing we can do.
我从没见过妈妈这么生气 I've never seen Mom so mad.
我也是 Me either.
Reese说的对 Reese is right.
我们已经无能为力了 We're out of our league.
只有一个人 There's only one person...
在妈妈如此生气的情况下还能逃过一劫的 who ever had Mom this mad at them and survived.
喂 Hello.
她让你们把头放在哪了 She has your heads where?
沙发下面 Under the couch.
全是因为Reese不承认他犯的事 All because Reese won't admit he did it.
你去承认吧 You admit it.
我没做 I didn't do it.
- 我也没做啊 - 骗子 - Neither did I. - Liar.
冷静 你们别在那 Chill. You are not going to get
互相吵了 anywhere fighting with each other.
首先 裙子烧坏的事是你们一起做的 First of all, you all burned the dress.
我没有 I didn't.
听我说 是你们一起干的 Hey, you all did it.
你们必须凝聚起来 You have to stay together.
团结在一起 You have to stay united.
团结起来抵抗谁 United against who?
我妈 My mom.
不错 Nice.
目前没人松口 No one broke so far,
所以你们该感到庆幸 so you should be proud of yourselves.
- 她已经用玩具威胁过你们了吗 - 是的 - Did she do the toy thing yet? - Yep.
- 原地转圈呢 - 嗯 - Spinning? - Uh-uh.
好的 我知道她接下来要做什么了 Okay. Good. I think I know where she's going.
单独谈话 Separate interviews.
听着 当她和你单聊时 Listen, when she gets you alone,
她会假装站在你那边 she's going to pretend she's on your side.
但其实不是的 She's not.
喝点吧 Go ahead.
是名牌呢 It's a name brand.
我没生你的气 I'm not mad at you.
我知道不是你干的 I know you didn't do this.
你是个乖孩子 You're a good boy.
但我想你帮我找出罪魁祸首 But I want you to help me find out who did.
这事很严重 This is serious.
他俩可能会有人把我们的房子烧成灰 One of your brothers could have burned the house down.
因此 他要受到严厉的惩罚 And for that, he will be severely punished.
但帮我抓住他的那个会很幸福的 But the one who helps me will be a very happy boy.
我希望那个人是你 And I want that to be you.
因为你一直是最乖的 'Cause you've always been the best one.
你一直是最乖的 You've always been the best one.
你一直是最乖的 You have always been the best one.
妈 说实话 我不知道谁干的 Mom, honestly, I don't know who did it.
我不知道 I don't know.
不知道 Don't know.
我猜你们觉得 Well, I guess you boys think...
妈妈在任你们摆布 是吗 you've got your old mom over a barrel, huh?
那我们就拭目以待吧 Well, we'll just see about that.
如果你们几个想玩下去 If you boys want to play,
那我就奉陪到底 we can play all night long.
先生 Sir?
嗯 哦 Hmm? Oh.
谢谢 谢谢 Thank you. Thank you.
我能再来杯伏特加马提尼吗 Oh, can I have another vodka martini, please?
非常好喝 Very good.
这回 按橄榄 洋葱 橄榄的顺序上 This time, let's go olive, onion, olive.
怎么都行 Whatever.
什么声啊 我听不见你说话 W-What's that? I can't hear you.
她要折磨死我们了 She's killing us!
*善良好 刻薄坏* *Nice is good, mean is bad*
*不要刻薄 因为那样不好* *Don't be mean 'cause mean is bad*
*善良要比刻薄好* *Nice is better than mean*
*拥抱好 恶棍坏* *Hugs are good, thugs are bad*
她干嘛总是毁掉我爱的一切啊 Why does she have to ruin everything I love?
Francis 我打算去告诉她是我做的 Francis, I'm just going to tell her I did it.
我知道不是我干的 但也总好过这样 I know it wasn't me, but anything is better than this.
- 哦 完了 - Oh, go-- - ??
太糟了 That's bad.
他们对Noriega也实施过心理战 They tried that psych-ops stuff on Noriega.
Noriega曾是巴拿马的实际领导人 1989年老布什下令出兵推翻了其军事政权
据说最后他都想割掉自己的耳朵 They said that by the end he wanted to cut his own ears off.
Malcolm 你现在不能垮掉 Malcolm, you cannot crack now.
否则你一辈也别想逃出她的五指山 She will own you for the rest of your life.
听我说 Malcolm Now, listen to me, Malcolm.
你要按我说的做 You have to do exactly what I say.
*善良好 刻薄坏* *Nice is good, mean is bad*
*不要刻薄 因为那样不对* *Don't be mean 'cause mean is bad*
*善良要比刻薄好* *Nice is better than mean*
*拥抱好* *Hugs are good*
*恶棍坏* *Thugs are bad*
*不要做恶棍 因为那很糟* *Don't be a thug 'cause thugs are bad*
* 拥抱要比恶棍好 * *Hugs are better than thugs*
- *聪明好* - 看见了吗 - *Smart is good...* - Did you see that?
- 万岁 - Francis就是个天才 - Hooray! - Francis is a genius!
加把劲 再大点声 Come on! Sing louder!
*善良好 刻薄坏* *Nice is good, mean is bad*
*不要刻薄 因为那样不对* *Don't be mean 'cause mean is bad*
*善良要比* *Nice is better than... *
下个生日聚会 奶奶和你们的朋友 Oh, your grandmother and all your friends...
会爱死这段录像的 are just going to love this at your next birthday party.
开玩笑吧 You're kidding me.
好吧 坚持住 Okay,just hang in there.
容我想一下 Give me a minute to think.
靠 姜还是老的辣 Damn, she's good.
他们崩溃了吗 Did they crack?
没呢 Dewey假装胃痉挛 Nah, Dewey faked a stomach cramp.
为他们赢取了点时间 Bought them some time.
好样的 Good man.
如果越战时能有你妈这样的人物 Man, if we would have had your mom in 'Nam,
河内广场现在就会有麦当劳的身影了吧 there'd be a McDonald's in Hanoi Square right now.
兄弟 河内广场现在确实有麦当劳 Dude, there is a McDonald's in Hanoi Square.
没错 All right.
Franklin 我想点菜了 Franklin, I'm ready to order.
你确定吗 先生 Are you sure, sir?
嗯 在我们家有个不成文的规矩 Mm-hmm. You see, in our family we have a saying.
"过了一个小时 就不用等了 ''After an hour, eat without her.
时间越久 出的事越大" If it's any longer, something's wronger.''
简单易懂 先生 Very catchy, sir.
当生活给你柠檬时 去做柠檬汁吧 Franklin Well, when life gives you lemons make lemonade, Franklin.
你们有柠檬汁吗 Do you have any lemonade?
没有 先生 No, sir.
那有柠檬吗 Oh. Do you have lemons?
有的 先生 Yes, sir.
在下杯酒里扔一个 现在我听听你们的特色菜吧 Well, throw one in another martini and let's hear those specials.
她在做什么 What's she doing?
看不出来 Can't tell.
或许她走了 Maybe she left.
是 我确定她是出去给我们买礼物了 Yeah, I'm sure she's gone out to buy us all presents.
万岁 Hooray.
外面太安静了 It's just too quiet out there.
快把我弄疯了 It's driving me crazy.
也许我们应该再唱一会 Maybe we should sing some more.
闭嘴 Dewey Shut up, Dewey.
我很好奇这些瓷砖上有多少个孔 I wonder how many holes are up in those tiles.
1 86,480个 1 86,480.
你把它们全数了一遍吗 You counted all those?
没啊 你只要数一块砖横纵的孔数 No, you just count one tile's holes across and down.
乘在一起 再乘上瓷砖的数量 Multiply it, then multiply it again by the number of tiles.
你越来越爱做这个了 You're doing that more and more.
做什么 Doing what?
锻炼大脑 That brain thing.
你会变得更聪明更怪异吗 Are you just going to keep getting smarter and weirder?
不知道 I don't know.
你能慢点吗 Well, can you tone it down a little bit?
因为我不想再打那些找抽的货了 'Cause I can't keep up with all these butt-kickings.
你在说什么 What are you talking about?
我每天至少要揍两个 Well, at least twice a day I have to whoop-ass...
乱叫你怪胎的家伙 on some kid calling you a weirdo.
说实话 累死了 Honestly, it's exhausting.
你揍他们是因为他们叫我怪胎 You beat up people 'cause they call me a weirdo?
上个家伙 他自己也是个怪物 The last kid, he was a freak anyways.
他完全没有立场起绰号啊 He was in no position to throw out names.
谢谢 Thanks.
为什么 For what?
没什么 Nothing.
嘿 Hey.
知道我在想什么 What am I thinking right now?
我只是聪明 但没有超能力 I'm smart. I'm not psychic.
你能知道狗狗在说什么吗 Can you understand what dogs are saying?
不能 No.
我能 I can.
哦 孩子们 Oh, boys
我不知道是谁在教唆你们死不认账的 I don't know who put you up to this sticking-together garbage,
但我很不爽 but I don't like it.
所以 是你们逼我把事做绝的 Therefore, you have forced me to do something terrible.
对这个珍贵的家庭成员说再见吧 Say good-bye to a cherished family member.
到底是谁 Who?
别这样 No!
- 妈 别这样 - 啊 啊 - Mom, no! - Uh-uh-uh.
你们敢 Don't you dare.
一动都别动 And don't move a muscle.
嗨 Lois Hi, Lois.
Ed 现在已经九点了 Look, Ed, uh, it's 9:00.
我正忙着呢 I'm a little busy right now.
就是这个问题 You see, there is the problem.
已经晚上九点了 我还一直听到叫喊声 it's 9:00 at night and I keep hearing screaming.
这回和你平常的喊声不太一样 Now this didn't sound like your normal screaming.
更像杀猪般的尖叫 It was more like killing screaming.
我并不是爱抱怨的人 I'm not one to complain--
这就是我们喜欢你的原因 That's why we like you.
到你们房间去 In your room now.
你这不错啊 Nice place you got here.
谢谢 先生 Thank you, sir.
我喜欢制造气氛 I like to, uh, create an atmosphere.
您用餐愉快吗 先生 Did you enjoy your meal, sir?
如果四颗橄榄 两颗洋葱 Well... if you can call four olives, two onions...
和很多酒精能称之为一顿晚餐的话 and a whole lot of alcohol a meal,
那就还不错 then, yes.
很好 先生 Very good, sir.
呃 Uh...
你这古龙水专区都有什么 what have you got in the cologne department?
嗯 您有什么特殊的要求吗 Um, were you looking for anything in particular?
我一直想试试代表我性格的香水 Well, I've been thinking about a signature scent.
我喜欢在我离开后人们会说 You see, I'd like to leave a room and have people say,
"天 闻起来好像Hal来过" ''Boy, it smells like Hal in here''
不过 but...
是友善的评价 in a nice way.
好的 Right. Yeah.
让我想想 你 Uh, let's see... you...
你突然让我想到 you strike me as a...
檀香 sandalwood.
檀香吗 Sandalwood, huh?
檀香 Sandalwood.
我们闻闻看 请吧 Let's give it a smell-see, shall we?
哈 Huh?
是的 Yes.
相当不错 That's quite nice.
再来点 Hit me.
给 Here we go.
这真不错 Oh, that's... that is quite nice.
哦 Ooh!
你的技术很不错啊 先生 You do a service to your craft, sir.
这家伙是个天才 This man is a genius.
自大的混蛋 Snooty bastard.
你会觉得这是最让人平等的地方吧 You'd think this place would be the great equalizer, huh?
即使是国王看起来也会像个傻瓜 You know, even a king looks like a fool...
在他上厕所的时候 when he's answering nature's call.
我说的对吗 当然对 Am I right? Of course I'm right.
那么 Well.
很高兴 It's been a pleasure.
哦 Oh.
对不起 Sorry.
祝你晚上愉快 Have a good evening.
呃 先生 Uh, sir.
嗯 Yes.
谢谢您对我的直视 Thank you for making eye contact with me.
孩子们 我真不知道还能做什么 Boys, I just, I don't know what to do anymore.
我不想惩罚任何人 I don't want to punish anyone.
我只想知道真相 All I want is the truth.
我不知道事情怎么会搞成这样 但我想快点结束 I don't know how things got this far, but I just want it to stop.
不行 他们不会买账的 Naw, they'll never buy it.
天啊 Hal Oh, my God. Hal.
他们拯救了TV They saved the TV.
好的 太好了 All right! Yeah! Yeah!
干得漂亮 漂亮 Beautiful work. Beautiful.
你们差不多快把她 Beautiful, You have her exactly where you want her
逼疯了 totally crazy.
现在是反击的时候了 Now it's time to take the offensive.
反击吗 The offensive?
没错 她不 Exactly. She won't...
等等 Wait a minute.
你听到呼吸声了吗 Did you hear breathing?
啥 What?
妈妈吗 Mom?
Malcolm Malcolm.
你先把电话挂掉好吗 Would you hang up the phone, please?
嗨 妈 Hi, Mom.
结婚纪念日快乐 Happy anniversary.
不好了 不好了 Not good! Not good!
怎么了 什么 What is it? What?
妈 电话 Mom! Phone!
哦 天啊 天啊 Oh! Oh, man. Oh, man.
我们会死的很惨的 We're gonna die!
就这样吧 That's it.
我得跑路了 I got to run away.
等等 Wait!
我们能化险为夷的 We can get out of this.
你动动脑子 You have to use that brain of yours.
想想 Think.
想想 Think!
我只能想到她会有多用力拧我的乳头 All I can think about is how hard she's twisting my nipple.
啊哦 Ow!
好吧 Okay.
思考 思考 Think. Think.
有办法了 I got it.
嗯 就是这个 Oh. Mmm. Here it is.
我们的曲子 That's our song.
- 不是我们的 - Not our song.
我能 Can I have...?
再来杯吗 Another one...
真不敢相信 Francis I cannot believe you, Francis.
你觉得自己很聪明 You think you are so clever
让他们和我对着干 是不 turning them against me, don't you?
没有 妈 No, Mom.
我们送你去Marlin学院 We did not send you to
不是让你打长途来破坏 Marlin Academy so that you can undermine...
我的威信力 my authority long-distance.
那你为什么送我来 Why did you send me?
总之不是为了让你破坏我的威信 Well, it was not so that you could undermine my authority.
如果我没弄错的话 And if I am not mistaken,
你正在破坏我的权威 you are undermining my authority.
你在做什么啊 What are you doing?
把庆祝的时间浪费在家里 Spending your anniversary at home
对一件破裙子耿耿于怀 fixating on a stupid dress.
你今晚就想做这个吗 Is that what you wanted to do tonight?
那我该怎么办 Francis 就这样算了吗 What am I supposed to do, Francis? Let it go?
是的 你就该这么做 任它去吧 Yes. That is exactly what you should do-- let it go.
但你不会的 因为你不会放过任何一件事 But you can't, 'cause you can never let anything go.
我也能不计较的 I can, too, let things go.
- 好吧 - 我能 - Fine. - I can.
- 好的 - 我能 - Fine. - I can!
好吧 忘了我刚才的话吧 Okay. Forget I said anything.
我不能再和你聊了 I cannot talk to you anymore.
哦 你太让我生气了 Ooh, you make me so mad.
有时我真想扭断你的脖子 Sometimes I just want to break your neck.
收到我送你的曲奇了吗 Did you get the cookies I sent you?
嗯 很好吃 Yeah, they were great.
好的 Good.
我发誓 理论上 这是个好主意 I swear to God, on paper, this was a great idea.
好吧 到此为止吧 All right, that's it.
穿好衣服 我们要去吃晚餐了 Get dressed. we're going to dinner.
天 居然管用了 Oh, my God, it did work.
什么 What?
晚餐 我不会饿死你们的 Dinner. I won't have you boys starving to death.
我受够了 The last thing I need is
一群社工和记者 a bunch of social workers and reporters...
在前院的草坪上哭哭啼啼 tearing up the front lawn.
你们在我改变主意前最好快点 Now, hurry up before I change my mind.
那裙子怎么办 What about the dress?
我真的很喜欢那裙子 I really liked that dress.
谢谢你送我一程 Tony Hey, thanks for the ride, Tony.
不客气 Hal Any time, Hal!
嗨 Hello!
亲爱的 Honey?
孩子们 Boys?
有人在家吗 Anybody home?
美死了 Hotcha!
今晚真是越来越好了 This evening just keeps getting better and better.
嗯 Hmm.
哦 不 Oh! No.
好吧 天啊 Okay. Oh.Jeezle.
不会再来一次吧 Not again.
电波字幕组 欢迎您的加入 新浪微博:@电波字幕组 官方网站:www.dbfansub.com