Come on, let's go. Let's go.
来吧 快走 快走
Hey, yo, fuck you, old man!
嘿 去你的 老头
What happened?
怎么了
I ain't getting involved.
我才不掺和
But you filming it.
但是你在录像
Anybody call an ambulance?
有人叫救护车吗
None of my business.
不关我事
Wow. So y'all just gonna sit there and let this happen to this man.
哇哦 所以你们就这样袖手旁观 任凭一切发生在这个人身上吗
It's 'cause he's Black, ain't it?
因为他是黑人 是不是
It's not 'cause he's Black.
不是因为他是黑人
It's 'cause he's doo-doo.
是因为他很垃圾
Man, what you say?
你说什么
Who's got a loose kid in the subway, man?
这是谁家小孩在地铁站撒野
Are you all right?
你还好吗
I was just trying to get-
我就是想...
Look-it, man, he can't even talk. He's delirious.
听着 兄弟 他话都说不全了 他已经神志不清了
Wait, don't I know you? Michael Che?
等等 我好像认识你 你是Michael Che吗
That's not the point. This man needs help.
这无关紧要 这个人需要帮助
Y'all not doin' nothing. What's wrong with y'all?
你们什么也不干 你们怎么了
What about the cops?
那警察呢
Y'all not gonna do nothing?
你们也无动于衷？
Save your energy, brother.
省点力气 兄弟
We gonna get you some help, man, come on.
我们会找人帮你的 兄弟 来
Unbelievable. This is a human being. This is a person!
真是不敢相信 这是个活生生的人啊 这是个人啊
Y'all just sitting here doing nothing.
你们就在一旁袖手旁观
You all right, man?
你还好吗 兄弟
Did you see where they go?
你看到他们往哪去了吗
Nah, man. Don't worry about them, man.
没 兄弟 别管他们了
We've got you.
我来帮你
Disgusting. I'm ashamed of this city, you know that?
令人作呕 你们知道吗 我真为这座城市感到愧疚
Them nasty, pussy-lickin', devil dyke fruitcakes had it coming!
她们那些肮脏的舔X的邪恶女同会遭报应的
Yo! Don't say that.
哟 别这么说
Oh, you think it's funny?
你觉得这很好笑吗
Nah, I think it's crazy, not funny.
没有 我觉得这很疯狂 不是好笑
You're the only one who gets it, son.
你是唯一一个明白的 孩子
Oh, wow, Michael Che, that's your father?
哦 哇哦 Michael Che 这是你爸吗
I think you know it's not my father.
我觉得你明知道这不是
Obviously, he's not my father.
显然 他不是我爸
And what if he is my son?
如果说他是我儿子呢
I ain't gay. I can make kids.
我不是基佬 我可能有小孩啊
I think he hit his head. It's not--it's not my father.
我觉得他撞到头了 这不...他不是我爸
God made Adam and Eve
上帝创造了亚当和夏娃
not Eve and Eve and double-sided dildos!
不是夏娃和夏娃还有双头XX
Hey!
嘿
Whoa, that's not--Whoa, hey!
哇 这不 哇哦 嘿
- Do better, Michael Che. - Don't say my name.
-好好表现 Michael Che -别喊我的名字啊
Yo, you need to take your nasty-ass dad home.
哟 你得把你那脏兮兮的爹带回家
This is not my father, all right?
他不是我爹 好不好
- Sound like your father. - It look like him, too.
-他听起来很像是你爹 -长得也很像
I love you, son.
我爱你 孩子
- No, all right. - We here together!
-不 好吧 -我们团聚了
- That's definitely your daddy. - He lyin'.
-他绝对是你爹 -他在说谎
I'm out of here, man.
我要走人了 兄弟
Oh, you just gonna leave your dad in the subway?
哦 你要就这么把你爹留在地铁站里吗
Tell your mother I said hello, son!
替我跟你妈妈问好 孩子
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, let me hear you say ♪
♪ Your folks, my folks ♪
♪ My folks, your folks ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Yeah! ♪
♪ Ha! ♪
Part of me likes the idea that you can be canceled.
某种程度上我挺喜欢人会被抵制这个概念的
It lets me know that
这提醒了我
there's a danger element to stand-up comedy.
做单口喜剧也有风险
There should be a danger--
本来就应该有点风险
or everybody else would fucking do it.
要不然岂不是人人都要来分一杯羹
Like, why would you want to do anything else but this...
这样你除了说单口还会干其他哪行吗
unless you could lose everything?
除非讲单口可能会让你失去一切
Why you dressed like that?
你为什么打扮成这样
I told you--I'm doing a "Vampire in Brooklyn" reboot
我跟你说过了 我在做一个《布鲁克林吸血鬼》的重启
《布鲁克林吸血鬼》为艾迪·墨菲主演喜剧
but this time it's in Queens.
但是这次发生在皇后区
Ah, Netflix is paying me.
网飞会付我工资
Yo, can you believe people saying this crazy dude is my father?
你能相信大家都说这个疯男人是我爸吗
People will believe anything nowadays, man.
这年头大伙真是什么都信啊
Yeah, but this is really, really bad, Che.
是啊 但这次真的很不妙啊 Che
Ah, it'll blow over.
都会翻篇的
I don't think so, man, not this time.
我不这么认为 兄弟 这次不是
Kenan, you're being dramatic.
Kenan 你太夸张了
Che, they are going to scrap the "Vampire in Brooklyn" reboot, man.
Che 他们要取消《布鲁克林吸血鬼》重启了 兄弟
Why, 'cause it's bad?
为什么 因为它很烂吗
No. HBO, Netflix, Amazon, Tubi--
不 HBO 网飞 亚马逊 Tubi-
nobody is gonna want to come near you
谁也不敢再来找你了
after this crazy shit with your dad.
自从发生了你爸这个事之后
He's not my dad.
他不是我爸
Besides, I get in trouble like this all the time.
而且我经常碰上这样的麻烦的
But this is the pipe that broke the camel's back.
但是这是压死骆驼的最后一根水管
You mean the straw.
你是说稻草
Whatever.
随便吧
My point is, if you don't fix this...
重点是 如果你不解决这个问题
you gonna be excommunicado.
你就要被逐出这里了
"Excommunicado"? That's a myth, okay?
逐出？ 那就是个传说 好不好
Besides, I'll just do stand-up.
再说了 我去做单口就好了
Che, you got one hour
Che 你有一个小时的时间
before this story goes global, and then after that...
然后这件事就要传出去了 至于那之后...
After that, what?
那之后 会怎样
You gonna have to move to Austin and start slingin' right-wing jokes.
你就得搬到奥斯汀 开始讲右翼笑话了
Kenan, any moment somebody's gonna come out in my defense and support me.
Kenan 现在随时都有可能有人站出来为我说话 支持我
Well, so far, it's only been Ben Shapiro, Candace Owens
好吧 目前为止 就只有Ben Shapiro Candace Owens
and Kwame Brown.
和Kwame Brown
Goddamn, that's the worst three.
该死 是最差的三个
Look, I-I can make this right, okay?
听着 我 我能解决这件事的 好吗
I-I can fix things. Just tell me what to do.
我能解决的 只要你告诉我该怎么做
You need to apologize.
你得道歉
Get the fuck out of here. I ain't apologizing for no bullshit, man.
快别说了 我才不会为了这屁事道歉呢 兄弟
What the fuck's wrong with you?
你有什么毛病
Che, I love you.
Che 我很爱你
But I guess you not gonna learn until you can see for yourself where this road ends.
但是我猜你不见棺材不落泪是吧
What road? What are you talking about?
什么东西 你说什么呢
I'm talking about every person that you ever thought was your friend
我说的是任何一个你曾认为是你朋友的人
is about to try to kill you in the press
都会试图在媒体那出卖你 毁掉你
just to save they own image, myself included.
只为挽救他们自己的形象 包括我本人
But here, take this with you.
不过 你拿着这个
What the fuck is it?
这是什么东西
Take it to the Cellar. Atell will know what to do.
带着它去Cellar Atell会知道该干什么的
But get the fuck away from me, man, and lose my number.
现在快滚开我身边 然后把我的电话号码删了
- You serious? - Yeah, go ahead.
-你认真的吗 -没错 快走
Don't let your mama see you with that wig on.
别让你妈妈看见你带着这个假发
She got heart problems.
她有心脏病
I'm gonna attempt to get myself canceled tonight.
我今天晚上要试着让自己被抵制
你有没有因为怀孕恐惧症
你有没有因为怀孕恐惧症 以至于暗中祈祷这个孩子 她会流掉
Have I ever had a pregnancy scare and prayed that she lost the baby?
我有没有过因为怀孕恐惧症而祈祷对方失去孩子
Good God.
天啊
That is fucking hilarious.
这他妈太好笑了
I can't say no.
我不能说我没想过
You don't have to pray to get rid of a baby.
你不必为了摆脱一个小孩而祈祷
There's a place you can go.
有一个地方你可以去
Howdy, y'all. I'm Sensei Arthur, and this...
大家好啊 我是Arthur师父 而这
Is Arthur's Abortion Dojo.
这里是Arthur的堕胎道场
Thanks, Arthur.
谢了 Arthur
Business was pretty rough after COVID.
新冠过后 生意很不景气
Hell, it was rough before COVID.
该死 新冠之前也很不景气
But one day, this little pregnant white woman came up in here, and she say
但是有一天 有一位怀孕的白人女士来到这里 她说
that the great state of Texas outlawed abortions.
伟大的德克萨斯州宣布堕胎为非法行为
And I say, "What that got to do with me?"
我说 这跟我有什么关系
And she say, "Kick me."
然后她说 踹我
现场模拟
Now I'm selling karate kicks at 40 bucks a pop.
现在 我出售空手道踢腿 40块一脚
And business is booming!
而且生意很兴隆
I do not have time for a baby.
我没有时间养小孩
满意的顾客
Problem solved.
问题解决了
All these women--preggo, preggo, preggo, preggo.
这些女人全都怀了 怀了 怀了 怀了
But in the end, it's all ragù.
但到最后 都是肉酱罢了
You'll be all right.
你不会有事的
It's time we fight back against abortion laws.
现在是我们反击堕胎法的时候了
Um, do you acknowledge Sensei Arthur's procedure is unsafe and illegal?
你知道Arthur师父的这套程序是非常不安全而且不合法吗
I really wish it hadn't come to this, but sure.
我真的希望不用走到这个地步 但当然
Hopefully the Supreme Court--
希望最高法庭
Ah, ah, step aside.
啊 啊 让开
Don't nobody want to hear that shit.
没人想听这些屁话
This one here, I call "Baby on Board."
这一招 我把它称为“板上宝宝”
Hold this here. Uh-huh.
拿着这个 啊哈
Little higher, little closer.
再高一点 再近一点
That's it. Right there.
就是这样 就放在这
So if you're a woman in Texas and you have an unwanted pregnancy--
所以 如果你是德克萨斯州的一名女性 而且正面临非意愿怀孕
Or you just missed a period, remember...
或者就是这个月的月经没来 请记住
When it comes to abortion laws,
当说到堕胎法时
you don't have to just lie down and take it.
你不必只是躺平接受
That's how you got pregnant in the first place.
你一开始就是因为这样才怀孕的
- Arthur! - What?
-Arthur -干嘛
♪ Come on down to Arthur's Abortion Dojo ♪
♪ 快来光临Arthur的堕胎道场 ♪
♪ And get your mojo back ♪
♪ 恢复你的最佳状态 ♪
God made Adam and Eve,
上帝创造了亚当和夏娃
not Eve and Eve and double-sided dildos!
不是夏娃和夏娃还有双头XX
Surprise, surprise.
震惊 震惊
Michael Che, hate crime.
Michael Che 仇恨犯罪
Let's get it trending.
让我们把他冲上热门
He's excommunicado.
他被放逐了
- That's him. - Is that Michael Che?
-那就是他 -那是Michael Che吗
He's excommunicado.
他是个放逐者
Can I help you?
能帮你什么吗
-Yeah, yeah. Let me get a hot dog. - You got it.
-好 给我来一个热狗 -没问题
Yeah. Little mustard on there.
好 再加一点芥末
On the house, Mr. Che.
请你的 Che先生
You nasty motherfucker.
你个狗杂种
The disguise ain't working, man!
你这身打扮根本不管用
I never been to prison, man.
我从来没坐过牢
You can't jerk off in jail, right?
坐牢的时候你没法XX
It's rude. You're in...
这很无礼 你在
What, if I jerk off and they see it, what, are they gonna--
如果他们看见我XX 他们接下来要干什么
what, are they gonna like me?
他们看上我怎么办
That is some fuckin' dude logic.
这就是男人的逻辑
"Man, I can't jerk off in here. Niggas gonna like me."
“我不能在这XX 有人会看上我的”
"If I start jerking off, I'ma make too many friends!"
“如果我开始XX 我会结交‘许多朋友’”
I'll be in the lunch line. "Hey, man, keep doing your thing, bro."
我在排队吃午饭的时候就会 “嘿 兄弟 继续做你自己的事”
"You don't know me, but keep doing your thing, man.
“你不认识我 但是接着干你的事的 兄弟”
You're getting me through this."
你就是我的精神支柱
Y'all have a seat.
你们都找个地方坐下
Listen up. My name is Kool-Aid.
听好了 我叫Kool-Aid
Kool Aid：酷爱牌饮料 美国的一种儿童饮料
And I'm here to let y'all know that prison ain't no joke.
我今天来到这里就是让你们知道 监狱不是儿戏
I was just like you--
我以前就跟你们一样
stealing car radios, joyriding, disrespecting my mother
偷汽车收音机 兜风 不尊重母亲
drinking wine all times of night, running fast, acting like a knucklehead.
晚上喝很多酒 跑得快 跟个傻蛋一样
20 years plus in this spot.
在这里蹲了二十多年
I wish I could go home, take a shower alone
我真希望我能回家 独自洗个澡
take a shit alone, maybe jack off alone.
独自拉屎 也许撸两管
Oh, you think this shit is funny, yo?
哦 你觉得这很好笑吗
What's your name, little bitch?
你叫什么 小贱人
Latrell.
I like "little bitch" better.
我觉得“小贱人”更合适
You think it's funny to be bad in school?
你觉得做学校里的坏孩子很好玩吗
I don't go to school.
我不上学
Uh-huh. I used to be just like you, man.
啊哈 我曾经就跟你一样
- You want to end up in prison like me? - No.
-你想最后像我一样沦落到坐牢吗 -不
You damn right you don't
你当然不想了
'cause you couldn't survive three minutes in here.
因为你在这里连三分钟都撑不下去
What you in here for, man?
你是为什么来这
Stealing a bike or some bullshit?
偷了别人的自行车还是什么
What?
啥
- You ain't eat your vegetables? - What?
-你不肯好好吃蔬菜？ -什么
Why you in here?
你为什么来这
I shot a nigga.
我拿枪打了个人
Kids, you hear this?
孩子们 你们听见没
Guns are not a toy.
枪不是玩具
You'll end up making a mistake just like this kid.
你们会酿成大错的 就像他一样
I ain't make no mistake.
我才没有酿成什么大错
I caught a nigga lackin' on the wrong side of town
我抓到一个家伙 他在我的地盘晃悠
so I dumped on him.
所以我朝他开了枪
- Wait, whoa, what? - Yeah.
-等等 什么 -没错
He really shoot a nigga?
他真的拿枪打人了吗
Yes, he did.
是的
All right, well, um, you know, I could tell
好吧 好吧 你要知道 我能看得出来的
you've been having a pretty bad year, young fella
你这一年过得挺不好的 小伙子
so I ain't gonna pick on you no more.
所以我就先不找你茬了
Latrell, right? That's--that's your name?
Latrell 对吧 这是 这是你的名字是吧
All right, well, that's-- that's a very good name, by the way.
好吧 这是 这是个非常好的名字 顺便一提
I like that name a lot.
我很喜欢这个名字
So who else in here can I knock some sense into?
这还有谁能让我做做思想工作的
How about you, little bitch? Why you in here?
不如就你吧 小贱人 你为什么来这里
Shot a nigga.
拿枪打人了
- You're, like, 12 years old. - So?
-你看着也就12岁吧 -所以呢
So where'd you get the gun?
所以你是怎么搞到枪的
I don't know. They everywhere.
我不知道 哪里都有啊
Hey, man, um, w-what's the deal with these little psychos?
嘿 兄弟 这些小疯子都是怎么回事
I told you. They're at-risk youth.
我跟你说过了 他们是高危青年
No, I was an at-risk youth.
不 我以前是个高危青年
These little niggas are monsters.
这些孩子是怪物
They should be in prison, not me.
他们应该进来坐牢 不是我
Come on, man, you were just like them.
别这样 兄弟 你以前就跟他们一样
No, I wasn't. I was a good kid.
不 我以前是个好孩子
I'm in here 'cause I whistled at a white woman.
我来坐牢是因为我对一位白人女士吹了口哨
That's illegal?
这是犯法的吗
I also had weed on me
而且我身上有大麻
which is legal now, by the way.
现在已经合法了 顺带一提
- Look, Kool-Aid, you're doing great, all right? - Yeah, yeah.
-听着 Kool-Aid 你做得很好 好吗 -是啊 是啊
You might not get through to everybody
你也许不能说动所有人
but some of them are really responding.
都是他们有一些人在回应啊
- Come on, you got this. - All right.
-来吧 你可以的 -好吧
Okay, um, everybody, show of hands--
好了 大家 请举手
how many of y'all in here because you shot somebody?
你们里面有多少人是因为拿枪打了人所以才来的
Even the little white kid? Who'd you shoot?
那个白人小孩也是吗 你打了谁啊
Walmart.
沃尔玛
Walmart, as in the whole store?
沃尔玛 是指整个超市吗
That's lit.
太酷了
Okay, look. I'ma be completely honest with y'all.
好了 听着 我跟你们说实话吧
W-when you get to prison, you gonna need, like a old, cool dude like myself.
当你们进了监狱的时候 你们会需要一个像我一样的酷老哥的
Uh, my name is Kool-Aid.
我叫Kool-Aid
That's my nickname 'cause I make a mean Kool-Aid.
这是我的绰号 因为我很会调Kool-Aid
My real name is, uh, Thaddeus, Thaddeus Jenkins III.
我的真名是 Thaddeus Thaddeus Jenkins 三世
Phew. I-I poop quietly, all right?
我 我拉屎很安静 好吗
I also, uh, shower very quietly.
我洗澡也很安静
And, uh, you guys won't even know
你们都想不到
when I jack off.
我XX的时候有多安静
Hey, man, can you get me back to my cell and away from these little fucks?
嘿 兄弟 你能把我送回我的牢房 离这些小混蛋们远远的吗
Y'all want to hear a sports joke?
你们想听一个体育笑话吗
Ready?
准备好了吗
Ben Simmons.
Ben Simmons
It's pretty good, right?
挺不错的 对吧
What's up, Atell?
怎么了 Atell
What are you doing here?
你在这里干什么
- Here to do a set. - Nope.
-来 坐这里 -不了
You are excommunicado.
你被放逐了
- Oh, come on, man. I still got a few minutes. - Nope.
-得了吧 兄弟 还有那么几分钟呢 -不
I need to be able to clear my name, okay?
我得给洗清我的罪名 好吗
These people need to hear my truth!
这些人需要听到真相
There's nothing I can do. You know the rules.
我帮不了你了 你知道规矩的
We have to honor the excommunicado.
我们要尊重放逐制度
Please?
什么
Come on, man, ple--
行了 兄弟
All right, look
好吧 听着
Kenan--he told me to give this to you.
Kenan 他跟我说把这个给你
Okay.
好吧
There is a place.
有一个地方
But tell Kenan we're square now.
但是告诉Kenan我们现在扯平了
All right.
好吧
You better leave. Things are about to get ugly.
你该走了 场面可能要难看起来了
Hey!
嘿
Michael Che, you suck!
Michael Che 你真烂
Damn, already?
干 这么快
- Yeah, you suck! - See?
-是啊 你真烂 -看见了吧
Let's boo this fat fuck out of here.
让我们把这个肥逼轰出去
"Fat"?
肥？
Quick, Che. Do you have any money?
快 Che 你身上有钱吗
Uh, shit.
呃 干
- This is all I got. - Okay, good.
-我就带了这点 -好 不错
Perfect. Now go.
完美 快走吧
What did I just pay you for?
我刚为什么给了你钱
You suck!
你真烂
- What the- - Hurry, Che, there's no time!
-什么... -快 Che 没时间了
Go! Run! Run, Che, run!
走 快跑 跑 Che 快跑
Fuck you, Mike! You ain't shit!
干你 Mike 你啥也不是
No one ever loved you, and no one ever will, man!
根本没人爱过你 也没人会爱你
Man, I hate that guy.
天 我真讨厌那个人
I think Joe Rogan was my favorite canceling of the year.
我觉得Joe Rogan那次是我本年度最喜欢的一次抵制
I'm afraid of podcasts, honestly.
我很怕播客 说实话
If I'm being truthful, it's because you talk too much.
如果我说实话 是因为要说的话太多了
Joe Rogan has said about 10,000 hours' worth of shit.
Joe Rogan讲了一万个小时那么多的话了
Some of them words is gonna be "nigga."
其中总会有一些词是“nigga”
How could it not be?
怎么会不是呢
He's said all the words you could say.
他已经把人能说的话都说了
I'm sick of playing games with you, Andre.
我不想跟你兜圈子了 Andre
Just tell us who killed Lil' Chris.
告诉我们谁杀了 Lil' Chris
Man, I don't know what you talkin' about.
兄弟 我根本不知道你在说什么
We know you know who did it.
我们知道你知道是谁干的
I want to see a lawyer.
我要见律师
Look, Andre...
听着 Andre
we're just looking for a little bit of help with this one.
我们只是希望在这个问题上得到一点帮助
Motherfucker, I'm a gangsta.
去你的 我是个黑帮成员
That means, in a million years, nigga I won't motherfuckin' snitch.
这就是说 再过一百万年我也不会他妈的告密的
So, if you gonna arrest me, arrest me.
所以 如果你们要把我抓起来 那就抓吧
Okay.
好吧
Okay.
好吧
It looks like we're gonna have to do this the hard way, then.
那么 看来我们不得不得采取强硬手段了
We'll get you to talk, you Black motherfucker.
我们会让你开口的 你个他妈的黑佬
Whoa. What was that?
哇 这句是干嘛
- I'm sorry. You're right. Absolutely right. Sorry. Sorry. - Okay.
-对不起 你说得对 完全正确 对不起 对不起 -好了
What are y'all doing?
你们在干什么
Just a little podcast.
只是一个小小的播客
Yeah, you're not afraid of a little podcast, are you?
是啊 你不会害怕一个小小的播客吧 是吧
I don't really know all about this podcasting shit, man.
我对播客这个东西不是很了解 兄弟
In three, two, one.
三 二 一 开始
Welcome to "The Street Talk Podcast,"
欢迎来到“道上谈话”播客
the podcast that lets you know everything that's going on in the streets.
在这里你可以知道所有你想知道的关于道上发生的一切
Brought to you by MasterClass.
由MasterClass为您带来
If you're gonna become a master at anything
如果你想成为哪一方面的大师
take a class.
去学个课
I'm Detective Thomas.
我是Thomas警探
And I'm Officer O'Brien.
我是O'Brien警官
And folks, we've got a very special guest on the pod this week.
大家 这周我们的节目请来了一位非常特别的嘉宾
This man is a real certified street legend.
他是一位真的经认证的街头传奇
Please welcome to the pod...
请欢迎新嘉宾
Andre!
Andre
No, no, no, my nigga.
不 不 不 兄弟
Yo, Andre, you are certified on these here mean streets
Andre 你是认证的在道上混的
and you are very, very gangsta.
而且你非常非常黑帮
So, Andre, tell us...
所以 Andre 告诉我们
who killed Lil' Chris?
是谁杀了Lil' Chris
I ain't no snitch, bro.
我才不是什么告密者 老兄
That is good.
这很好
You know, and that's why we love you.
你知道 这也是为什么我们都爱你
You know what I mean? 'Cause you ain't no snitch.
你明白吗 因为你不会告密
But you know what? The streets want to know.
但你猜怎么着 大家都想知道
Not me, not us, the streets, bro.
不是我 也不是我们 是大家 兄弟
But you motherfuckers is cops.
但是你们他妈的是警察
Please.
拜托了
Come on, now. Would a cop do this?
来吧 警察会这么做吗
- Yo. Hey, man, Jesus. - Sorry, sorry.
-嘿 兄弟 天啊 -对不起 对不起
Look, don't think of us as cops. Blegh.
听着 别把我俩想成警察
- Think of us as podcasters. - Yeah!
-把我俩想成做播客的人 -没错
So tell us, who shot Lil' Chris?
所以告诉我们 谁枪杀了Lil' Chris
Isn't that still snitching, though?
这不还是告密吗 不过
It's not snitching if you say it on a podcast, silly.
如果你是在播客上说的话就不算是告密啊 笨蛋
Exactly!
就是这样
Oh. Well, wow.
好吧 哇哦
Wow, since you say it like that, well
哇哦 既然你们这么说的话 好吧
my nigga Bill Bill shot that nigga, you know?
我兄弟Bill Bill杀了他 你知道吗
- Bill Bill shot Lil' Chris! - That's a fact.
-Bill Bill杀了Lil' Chris -没错
But--but--but I ain't no snitch, though.
但是 但是 但是 我不是告密者
Tell you what, the streets are going wild in the comments section.
告诉你吧 大家在评论区都疯了
The--the comments?
评论？
Let me read this one comment.
让我读一下这条评论
It says, "Thank you, Andre, for keeping it so gangsta."
这写着“谢谢你 Andre 谢谢你一直保持黑帮气质”
So the streets is feelin' me, that's what you saying then?
所以大家都很喜欢我 你是这个意思吧
They are loving you, big guy!
他们爱死你了 大个子
So let me ask ya, who shot Peanut in 2017?
让我问问你 2017年是谁开枪打了Peanut
Who did that?
谁干的呀
I knew your bitch ass was gonna ask that. You know what I mean?
我就知道你们两个小贱人要问这个 你懂我意思吗
Come on, hit us with it.
来吧 说给我们听听
I'll tell y'all bitch-ass niggas
我会告诉你们俩
only because I fuck with this podcast.
但是只是因为我很喜欢这个播客
I fucks with this for real.
我真的很喜欢
My nigga Earl shot that nigga, dog.
我兄弟Earl打的他 老兄
Earl, who still lives on Thompson and Church to this day.
Earl 他现在还住在汤普森街和教堂街（？）
Thompson and Church-- write that down.
汤普森街和教堂街 快记下来
Earl Coleman, nigga.
Earl Coleman 兄弟
C-O-L-E-M-A-N.
C-O-L-E-M-A-N
This is going viral, kids.
你要火了 孩子
Well, I tell you what, thank you for clearing that up.
让我告诉你 谢谢你说清这些事
'Cause I'd heard on Clubhouse that some guy named Charles did it.
因为我听说是一个叫Charles的人干的
Sleepy Charles?
瞌睡虫Charles
Oh, yeah, you know him?
哦 你认识他
- I ain't no snitch. - No, come on.
-我不告密 -别 来吧
- But... - Come on!
-但是... -来吧
For the streets!
为了大家
He shot that nigga, too!
他也打了Charles
- Oh, give it up! Give it up for Andre! - You know how I do it.
-哦 大家一起欢呼 给Andre一点掌声 -你知道我的
Letting the streets know!
让大家都知道
Best guest ever.
有史以来最好的嘉宾
Come back on this show anytime.
随时回来上我们的节目
My nigga, don't tell me that.
兄弟 还用你说
I'll come back on this motherfucker.
我肯定会回来上这个节目
I got mad wild stories to tell you niggas, dog.
我还有很多狂野的故事要告诉你们 老兄
What do you got coming up next?
你下一次准备讲什么
- Next week we're opening up the illegal gambling spot on 125th and Lenox. - Okay, okay.
-下周 我们要在第125街和莱诺克斯街举行地下赌博 -好的 好的
The following week, we doin' the drive-by by Lincoln Projects.
再下一周 我们在林肯项目地区进行驾车袭击
And then me and Ralika
然后我和Ralika
you know, that's my baby moms, man
你知道的 就是孩子他妈
we going to the abortion clinic, you know what I mean?
我们要去堕胎诊所 你懂我意思吗
She's seven months pregnant.
她怀孕七个月了
And, hey, learn to perform an abortion yourself on MasterClass.
嘿 在MasterClass上学习如何自己动手进行堕胎
You niggas invite me back on the show
你们下回再请我来
I might let y'all know who threw that girl off the bridge.
我可能会告诉你们是谁把那个女孩丢下桥的
You know that, too, huh?
这你也知道
You'll have to bring me back up to see.
你们想知道得请我返场了
All right! And we are out!
好吧 我们结束了
Well, I think we got him.
好了 我觉得我们搞定了
Yeah, he'll be dead in a week.
是啊 他一周之内必死无疑
Oh, fuck.
哦 干
I think we all need, like
我觉得我们都需要 比如说
Canceled Nigga Cheat Day.
争议人士欺骗日
Like, just one cheat day
那么一个欺骗日
where we could just listen to R. Kelly and not worry about it.
这一天我们能单纯地听听R. Kelly的歌 而不必为此担心什么
R. Kelly 美国知名R&B歌手 2021年被指控涉嫌敲诈勒索和性交易等
Who's your Canceled Nigga Cheat Day?
你会把欺骗日花在哪个被抵制的人身上
Kanye. Is Kanye canceled?
Kanye Kanye被抵制了吗
Kanye, you can't-you can't cancel a nigga with special needs.
Kanye 你不能 你不能抵制一个有特殊需要的人
That's not--
那不...
Members only. Are you qualified for entry?
仅限会员 你有资格进吗
Qualified for what, man?
什么资格 兄弟
I don't even know what this place is.
我都不知道这是个什么地方
Oh, Michael Che, man. I didn't recognize you in that wig.
哦 Michael Che 兄弟 你戴着这个假发我都没认出来
What are you doing, a movie or somethin'?
你在干什么呢 拍电影还是什么
Open the fucking door, man. It's freezing out here.
快他妈的开门 兄弟 外面冷死了
- Jesus, come on, man! Goddamn! - Sorry, man. Come on.
-天啊 悠着点 兄弟 -抱歉 兄弟
Welcome to Club Excommunicado.
欢迎来到放逐者俱乐部
Have a seat.
坐吧
Okay.
好
I was told that you're the only one that could help me.
有人跟我说 你是唯一一个能帮我的人
I would like to tell you a story.
我想给你讲个故事
Wait a minute.
等一下
Just listen to my story, damn it.
先听完我的故事 该死
Fuck me.
该死
- You want a drink first? - No.
-你想先喝点什么吗 -不了
Suit yourself.
随你吧
Now, you don't know who I am
你不认识我是谁
but I used to be you a long time ago
但很久以前 我也跟你一样
except a lot better.
但是比你强多了
- You see, Rudy... - Rudy?
-听着 Rudy -Rudy？
The man is trying to get people like you and me.
他们想整像你我一样的人
What do you mean, "you and me"?
你说的“像你我一样”什么意思
I mean truth-tellers.
我是说说实话的人
Oh. Well, say that.
好吧 可以这么说
Well, don't you get it?
你还不明白吗
They're trying to use our worst actions to define our legacy
他们想用我们最糟糕的言行来定义我们
and it's wrong.
这是不对的
I guess.
应该吧
You see, I've done millions of good things and, like, 58 bad things.
你看 我做了几百万件好事 还有 58件坏事吧
Hell, nigga.
行了 兄弟
You sure you don't want a drink?
你确定你不要来一杯吗
I'm positive.
我确定
You see, Vanessa, we are the same.
听着 Vanessa 我们是一样的人
That's why we have to support each other in public, no matter what.
所以我们必须公开地相互支持 不论发生什么
Like you supported your dad against those pussy-lickin' fruitcakes.
就像你支持你爸 反抗那些女同一样
For the last time, he's not my dad.
最后再说一次 那不是我爸
He's everybody's dad, like me.
他是所有人的爸 就像我一样
That's not what I meant.
我不是这个意思
You'll be happy to know that I'll be throwing my full support behind you.
你一定很高兴 听到我将全力支持你
But you have to do one thing--
但是你要做一件事
murder W. Kamau Bell.
杀掉W. Kamau Bell
No.
不
Well, at least choke out Hannibal Buress.
至少勒死Hannibal Buress
- Not gonna do that either. - Oh, come on!
-这我也不会做的 -哦 得了吧
Damn.
靠
Maybe I should just apologize.
也许我就应该道歉的
What? You didn't do anything wrong.
什么 你根本没做错任何事
Who cares? I just know I don't belong in this club with you.
谁在乎 我只知道我不应该和你归在同一个地方
Besides, if you're a decent person
还有 如果你为人正派
people will see that eventually.
大家最终都会看在眼里的
And if you're not a decent person?
那如果你不是个正派的人怎么办
Well, nigga, that sounds like your problem.
好吧 兄弟 这个听起来是你自己的问题了
But I got to go get my career back.
但是我得去挽回我的事业了
Very weird to meet you. I'm out.
见到你很奇怪 我走人了
But I-I didn't even finish my story, Denise!
但是我 我还没讲完我的故事呢 Denise
I think you did.
我觉得你讲完了
Why don't you go ahead and have one drink with me, please?
你为什么不过来跟我喝一杯呢 拜托
No!
不
Well, pull your damn pants up!
好吧 把你的裤子提上
美国喜剧演员Roseanne Barr（《萝珊妮家庭生活》）
I didn't know Roseanne was canceled.
我都不知道Roseanne被抵制了
What did Roseanne do?
Roseanne干什么了
她种族歧视
She's racist?
她种族歧视？
You can get canceled for just being racist?
人会就因为种族歧视而被抵制吗
She what?
她干什么了
She called Valerie Jarrett a--
她说Valerie Jarrett是
the Valerie Jarrett?
那个Valerie Jarrett？
Who's Valerie Jarrett?
谁是Valerie Jarrett
Who the fuck is Valerie Jarrett?
谁他妈是Valerie Jarrett
And, yes, I think it's you. Are you Valerie Jarrett?
没错 我觉得是你 你就是Valerie Jarrett吗
"She called Valerie Jarrett a monkey...
“她说Valerie Jarrett是猴子”
"in traffic...
“在路上”
just because I cut her off."
“就因为我超了她的车”