红矮星号
第五季第二集
托马斯·奥尔曼 Thomas Allman.
托马斯·奥尔曼 我们发现你不值得存在 Thomas Allman, you have been found unworthy of having existed.
是你吗 妈妈 Is that you, mother?
你的生活以及所有关于你的记忆 都将从历史中抹去 Your life and all memory of you will be wiped from history.
你在时空连续体中占据的空间 The void you occupied in the space-time continuum
将被分配给一个从未得到生命机会的人 will be allocated to a person who was never given the gift of life.
愿他们更明智地度过一生 May they spend their time more wisely.
求你了 为什么是我 Please. Why me?
肯定还有活得更咸鱼的人 There must be others who've lived worthless lives.
所有人都将接受审判 All will be judged.
已完成 接下来只要删除你的物理形态 It is complete. All that remains is to delete your physical form.
抱歉打扰你了 先生 现实控制者告辞 Sorry to disturb you, sir. Reality control.
咖啡 先生 双份咖啡因 四份糖 Coffee, sir. Double caffeinated, quadruple sugar.
- 不错啊 - 啊 维吉尔的《埃涅阿斯纪》 - Nice one. - Ah, Virgil's "Aeneid".
阿伽门农追求特洛伊海伦的史诗故事 Oh, the epic tale of Agamemnon's pursuit of Helen of Troy,
有史以来最伟大的拉丁诗人用羽毛笔 the most classic work by the greatest Latin poet
在羊皮纸上写成的最经典的故事 who ever put quill to parchment.
是啊 这是漫画版 Yeah, it's the comic book version.
挺好的 充满了历史气息 It's good, man. Absolutely full of history.
嗖 砰 啪的一声 "Zap! Pow! Ker-splat!
死在床上吧 你这特洛伊猪狗 额啊 啪 砰 Die in bed, you Trojan pig-dog! Gnargh! Ker-pow!"
看来他们那么忠于原著啊 I see they've remained faithful to the original text.
我相信维吉尔会认可哦 I'm sure Virgil would have approved.
克莱登 不要打击他 Kryten, don't discourage him.
这是他度过的唯一一本没有升盖的书 It's the only thing he's ever read that doesn't have lift-up flaps.
但我不懂 I dunno though.
这个特洛伊木马简直是胡说八道 我可不买账 This wooden horse of Troy malarkey, I'm not buyin' that.
这是历史上最著名的军事战术之一 It's one of the most famous military manoeuvre in history.
希腊人在特洛伊城外扎营 I mean, the Greeks have been camped outside Troy,
对特洛伊人砰砰 啪哒 咔嚓 ker-powing, zapping, ker-splatting the Trojans
有十年这么久 是吧 for best part of a decade, yeah?
- 所以呢 - 所以突然之间 - So? - So all of a sudden,
他们某天早上醒来 发现希腊人已经走了 they wake up one morning and the Greeks have gone.
在城墙外留下这个礼物 And there outside the city walls, they've left this gift,
献给他们勇敢敌人的礼物 一匹巨大的木马 this tribute to their valiant foes, a huge wooden horse,
刚好足够容纳五百名全副武装的希腊人 just large enough to happily contain 500 Greeks in full battle dress
还留了足够大的空间给厕所 and still leave adequate room for toilet facilities?
你是说 没有任何一个特洛伊人觉得 Are you telling me that not one Trojan goes,
等一下 这礼物有点搞笑 "Hang on a minute. That's a bit of a funny pressie.
怎么不送几百双袜子和几瓶须后水啊 "What's wrong with a couple of hundred pairs of socks and some aftershave?"
不 他们没有 他们只是把马拉进城 No, they don't, they just wheel it in
很显然他们只想早点睡觉 and obviously had to go for an early night.
这么蠢的人 活该在自己床上 People that stupid deserve to be ker-powed,
被砰砰 啪哒 咔嚓 zapped and ker-splatted in their beds.
你知道最可笑的是什么吗 You know what the big joke is?
由于这段特殊的历史 From this particular phase in history,
我们有了“小心希腊厚礼”这则成语 we derived the phrase "beware of Greeks bearing gifts",
明明应该这么说才更符合逻辑 when it would be much more logical to derive the phrase,
“小心特洛伊人 他们是十足的傻叉” "Beware of Trojans, they're complete smegheads."
谢谢你哦 大历史学家 Well, thank you, A.J.P. Taylor. Alan John Percivale Taylor，英国著名历史学家
那是什么 What was that?
奇怪了 我们的航线变了 That's strange. We've changed course.
你确定吗 霍利 Are you sure, Holly?
没有改变航线的程序 There's no course change programmed.
又变了一次 方向180 彻底调头了 And again. Mark one eight zero. That's a complete turn.
我们正在返回红矮星号 We're heading back to Red Dwarf.
让我手动操作 霍利 Give me manual, Hol.
- 啊 - 我们被锁定了 - Agh! - We're locked out!
这不是故障 是有什么东西在控制飞船 This is not a malfunction. There is something's controlling the craft.
霍利 附近有船只吗 Holly, any traffic around?
局部扫描没有发现 Nothing on the local scan.
这不可能 一定有 This is impossible. There must be...
我控制了人类利斯特 不要试图反抗我 I am in possession of the human Lister. Do not attempt to resist me.
他怎么了 他终于爆声了? What happened to him? His voice finally break?
你是谁 Who are you?
颤抖吧 我是审判官 Tremble at my name. I am the Inquisitor.
- 审判官? - 你的飞船在我的控制之下 - The Inquisitor? - Your vessel is under my control.
它会送你们回母舰 在那里进行审判 It will return you to your mother ship where you will face judgement.
你们每人都要举例证明你们的存在是合理的 You will each present a case to justify your existence.
如果失败了 将会被删除 If you fail, you will be deleted.
- 你还好吗 先生 - 我觉得还好 天呐 - Are you OK, sir? - Yeah. God, I think so.
有点发抖 A little bit shaky.
我觉得还是应该给你做一个医学扫描 I think we should run you through the medi-scan, though,
以防万一 just as a precaution.
好吧 Yeah, OK.
克莱登 你又听过这个审判官吗 So, Kryten, you've heard of this Inquisitor?
只是一个神话 黑暗的寓言 恐怖的故事 Only as a myth, a dark fable, a horror tale,
用于在午夜烟火闪烁的余烬中诉说 told across the flickering embers of a midnight fire
让太空狗子们聚集在一起喝蔬菜发酵制品 wherever hardened space dogs gather to drink fermented vegetable products
开展血腥恐怖故事比赛 and compete in tales of blood-chilling terror.
一个简单的“有”就足够了 A simple "yes" would have sufficed.
- 那他是谁 - 他什么毛病 - So who is he? - What's his beef?
传说有个模拟人能自我修复 Well, the legend tells of a droid, a self-repairing simulant,
获得永生 直到时间的尽头 who survives till the end of eternity, to the end of time itself.
孤独了数百年之后 After millions of years alone,
他终于得出结论 上帝不存在 he finally reaches the conclusion that there is no God,
来世不存在 no afterlife,
存在唯一目的就是过一种有意义的生活 and the only purpose of existence is to lead a worthwhile life.
于是这个机器人造了一个时间机器 And so the droid constructs a time machine
在时空中游荡 and roams eternity,
访问历史上的每一个灵魂 评估他们 visiting every single soul in history and assessing each one.
抹去所有浪费生命的人 He erases all those who wasted their lives
用之前没有生命机会的人取代他们 and replaces them with those that never had a chance of life,
未受精的卵细胞 the unfertilised eggs,
没有成功的精子 the sperms that never made it.
这就是审判官 他清除废物的人 That is the Inquisitor. He prunes away the wastrels,
扫除不幸的人 删除没有价值的人 expunges the wretched and deletes the worthless.
我们有大麻烦了 We're in big trouble.
谁来决定什么是没有价值呢 Who's to say what's worthless?
哦拜托 照照镜子吧 Oh, please! Take a look in the mirror.
在“一无是处人物列表”里读出你的条目 Read your entry in "Who's Nobody".
不 我认真的 谁来评判呢 谁来决定什么是有价值的 No, I mean it. Who's to judge? Who's to say what's worthwhile?
面对现实吧 利斯特 每天躺在床上读自行车杂志 Well, let's face it, Listy. Lying on your bunk reading "What Bike"
吃八小时的糖泡芙三明治 and eating Sugar Puff sandwiches for eight hours every day
是不可能满足条件的 is unlikely to qualify.
所以就因为我没有写过任何交响乐 So just because I haven't written any symphonies
或者没画过西斯廷教堂 就说明我无能吗 or painted the Sistine Chapel, that makes me prunable?
不是 作为一个一文不值 一无是处的太空懒汉 No, being a totally worthless, unwashed space bum,
才说明你无能 that's what makes you prunable.
没错 标准不是声誉 Precisely. The criterion is not fame,
只是过一种有意义的生活 it is simply to have lived a worthwhile life.
为什么没人说过这个 Why did no one mention this before?
如果一开始就告诉我 If I'd been told about this at the start,
目标是过一种有意义的人生 that the object was to lead a worthwhile life,
我肯定就会做点什么的 I could have done something about it.
那些慈善筹款活动上门请求捐款的时候 All those charity telethons when I used to ring in and pledge donations,
要是我知道这些的话 我就会把我的信用卡号码告诉他们 if I'd known all this, I would have given them MY credit card number.
先生 你不必做一个伟大的慈善家 Sir, you don't have to be a great philanthropist,
或者传教士 只需要抓住生命赐予的机会 or a missionary worker, you simply have to seize the gift of life...
- 完了完了 - 做出贡献 - Oh, God. -...make a contribution...
- 完了完了 - 不管有多小 - Oh, God. -..no matter how small.
- 完了完了 - 你只需要 - Oh, God. - You simply...
只需要过一种不完全以自我为中心 simply have to have led a life that wasn't
虚荣 自私的生活 totally egocentric, vain and self-serving.
你故意的是吧 You're doing this on purpose, aren't you?
我只是想安慰安慰你 先生 I'm just trying to make you feel better, sir.
那你还是闭嘴吧 Well, shut up, then!
等一下 Hang on a minute.
我们为什么要在意那些半疯半癫的流氓机器人 Why should we take any notice of some half-crazed rogue robot
他们有什么资格自命为人类的法官和陪审团 who's appointed himself judge and jury to the whole humanity?
我们为什么要屈从于他的审判 Why should we kowtow to his judgement?
因为我有能力把你的身体像干芦苇一样掰成两半 Because I have the power to snap your body in two like a dry reed!
好答案 伙计 是个好答案 Good answer, man! Good answer!
- 他在哪儿 - 我要现身了 颤抖吧 - So where is he? - See me now and tremble!
审判开始 The inquisition begins.
向我证明你值得拥有生命的荣耀 Prove to me you are worthy of the honour of life
要么就永远堕入虚无的深渊 or drink deeply from the well of nothingness for all eternity.
我讨厌“要么这个 要么那个”的问题 I hate these "either/or" questions.
谁先来 Who is to be first?
利斯特 Lister!
全息影像 你第一个来 The hologram. You shall be first.
什么 再说一遍 Pardon? Sorry.
你被赐予了最伟大的礼物 生命 You have been granted the greatest gift of all - the gift of life.
告诉我 你做过什么值得拥有这么好的运气 Tell me, what you have done to deserve this superlative good fortune?
我对您怀着最崇高的敬意 Well, I say this with the highest respect,
但是谁给你的资格让你要求 but what gives you the right to ask -
不 是强迫我回答呢 殿下 no, actually, demand - that answer of me, Your Magnificence?
所有人都必须回答审判官 All must answer to the Inquisitor!
我怎么知道听证是公平的 How do I know I'll get a fair hearing?
因为就像所有面对审判官的人一样 Because, like all who stand before the Inquisitor,
你的法官就是 your judge shall be...
你自己 ...yourself!
哦 他叉的 Oh, smeg.
哦 确实他叉的 老哥 "Oh, smeg" indeed, matey.
每个人都是由自己来评判的？ Everyone is judged by their own self?
我知道这有点玄乎 但这是唯一公平的方法 It's a bit metaphysical, I know, but it's the only fair way.
现在 证明你自己 Now, then. Justify yourself.
首先 我 Well, first I...
- 撒谎 - 我做过好事 - Liar. - I've done good things.
不 你没有 No, you haven't.
在我心里 我一直在努力做好事 In my heart, I've always tried to do good things.
不 你没有 No, you didn't.
听着 我一直在以我的方式努力过好一辈子 Look, in my way I've tried to lead a good life.
什么时候 When?
啊 那个角落里是什么 是大天使加百列 Ah! What's that in the corner? It's the Archangel Gabriel!
好了 这就是我的转变 我焕然一新了 哈利路亚 Well, that's me converted! I'm a new man. Hallelujah!
你就是个卑鄙无耻 胆小如鼠 You are a slimy, despicable, rat-hearted,
小肚鸡肠的货色 是吧 green discharge of a man, aren't you?
额 算是吧 Well...sort of, yes.
那么 证明你自己 So, then, justify yourself.
我还能是什么 What else could I have been?
我父亲是个半疯狂的军事失败者 My father was a half-crazed military failure,
我母亲是个来自地狱的犯贱皇后 my mother was a bitch-queen from hell.
颜值和天赋都被我兄弟们占了 我能拥有什么 My brothers had all the looks and talent. What did I have?
难打理的头发和生长的脚趾甲 Unmanageable hair and in-growing toenails.
使得 我承认我一无是处 Yes, I admit I'm nothing.
但是我起跑线就不行 But from what I started with, nothing is up.
嗨 哥们儿 Hi, buddy.
这是你的审判日 伙计 This is your judgement day, bud.
我要很严酷才行 不能有任何偏袒 I gotta be cruel. There can be no favours.
我在收音机上听过你 I'm hearing you on FM.
我要问你这个问题 证明你的存在是合理的 I have to ask you the question - justify your existence.
你做过什么贡献 What contribution have you made?
我给世界带来了快乐 因为我有个如此美丽的屁股 I have given pleasure to the world because I have such a beautiful ass.
- 那倒是真的 - 我现在可以走了吗 - Well, that's true. - Can I go now?
- 这就说完了? - 还不够吗 - That's your case? - You need more?!
有人可能会说这是一个相当肤浅的论点 Some might say that's a pretty shallow argument.
有人可能会说我是个相当肤浅的人 Some might say I'm a pretty shallow guy.
但这肤浅的家伙有个很棒的屁股 But a shallow guy with a great ass.
- 有时候你让我都要惊叹你 - 谢谢 - Sometimes you astonish even me. - Thank you.
好吧 克莱登 证明你自己 Well, Kryten, justify yourself.
恐怕我很难证明 I'm not sure I can.
但是你的生活确实充满了善行 But surely your life is replete with good works.
很少有人能比你还要无私 There can be few individuals who have lived a more selfless life.
但我生来就是无私的 But I am programmed to live unselfishly.
所以 这些善行都不是处于好的冬季 And therefore any good work comes not out of fine motives,
只是对于一系列的二进制命令 我不得不服从 but as a result of a series of binary commands I am compelled to obey.
那么 机器人该怎么证明自己呢 Well, then, how can any mechanical justify himself?
也许只有当他试图打破自己的程序 Perhaps only if he attempted to break his programming
按照自己独立形成的一套价值观 and conduct his life according to a set of values
来生活 he arrived at independently.
你的观点很容易让你被删 Your argument invites deletion.
规则是你定的 不是我 The rules are yours, not mine.
你希望被清除吗 Do you wish to be erased?
我的程序要求我没有愿望 我只为别人服务 I am programmed not to wish for anything. I serve.
在人类身上 这种行为可能被认为是顽固的 In a human, this behaviour might be considered stubborn.
但我不是人类 你也不是 But I am not human, and neither are you.
我们没有资格评判他们 And it is not our place to judge them.
我想知道你为什么这么做 I wonder why you do?
够了 Enough.
嗯 赶紧完事吧 傻叉 Well...get out of this one, smeghead.
你说什么 What you talkin' about?
你知道如果你努力的话 你的生活会是什么样 You know what you could've made of your life if you'd tried,
- 你可以成为什么样的人 - 那又怎样 - what you could've become. - So?
你有脑子 伙计 但是你从来不用 You've got brains, man. Brains you've never used.
- 那又怎样 - 那就证明你自己 - So? - So justify yourself.
赶紧完事吧 Spin on it!
审判结束了 The inquisition is over.
我已经做出了裁决 I have reached my verdict.
你们中有两个人没能实现你们的潜能 Two of you have failed to become that which you might so easily have been.
活得毫无价值 所以根本算不上生活 You have lived without merit, and so not lived at all.
- 你个混蛋 你把他们都消灭了 - 先生 - You scum! You've wiped them out! - Sir...
他疯了 克莱登 他把阿猫和里默抹了 He's crazy, Kryten. He's erased Cat and Rimmer.
- 他们很安全 - 先生 - They are quite safe. - Sir...
恐怕我们才是要被抹除的 I'm afraid it is we who are to be erased.
啊 Ah.
阿猫还能比我俩更有价值? The Cat has lead a more worthwhile life than neither of us?
他肤浅又自私 那个全息影像也是 He is a shallow and selfish creature, as is the hologram.
按照他们自己的低标准 他们的表现已经很好了 By their own low standards, they have acquitted themselves.
而你和这机器人本可以实现更多 Whereas you and the mechanoid could have been so much more.
怎么回事 What's this?
最好的猜测是 我们被移除时间了 Best guess, we are being surgically removed from time.
关于我们的所有记忆 所有行为 Every memory of us, every action we ever performed,
都被消除了 我们的存在正在被消灭 is being dissolved. Our lives are being undone.
已完成 时间线补丁完成 因果关系已愈合 It is complete. The time-lines are knitted. Causality is healed.
接下来只需要移除你们的物理形态 All that remains is to remove your physical forms from existence.
如果你有什么锦囊妙计 克莱登 Well, if you've got some amazing secret plan up your sleeve, Kryten,
现在可以说了 now's the time to mention it.
没有妙计 先生 No plan, sir.
也没有锦囊 No sleeves.
好极了 接下来我做了什么 Perfect. Now, what did I do next?
现在 快 拿着手套 然后离开 Now, hurry! Take the gauntlet and go!
- 这他叉发生了什么 - 我没时间解释了 - What the smeg is goin' on? - I don't have time to explain.
我是从未来赶来救你的 现在你们必须走了 快 I've come from the future to rescue you. Now you must go. Hurry!
那我怎么办 我是说你 我们 What about me...I mean you...I mean us?
- 恐怕我们会死 - 死? 怎么死的? - I'm afraid we get killed. - Killed? How?
当我站在这里向你解释的时候 While I'm standing here explaining this to you,
审判官从我身后跳出来 就像这样 the Inquisitor jumps me from behind. Like this.
你救不了我 You can't save me.
在你们到达储藏室的最后对决之前 Before you reach the final confrontation in the storage bay,
你们肯定破解了手套的控制器 you must have decoded the gauntlet's controls.
怎么做的 你能给点提示吗 How? Can you give us a clue?
我无法发解释 Well, I cannot explain.
出于某种奇怪的原因 我的临终遗言是“英格” For some bizarre reason, my final words are "enig".
- “英格”? - 是的 英格 - "Enig"? - Yes. Enig...
- 快啊 先生 - 他刚刚杀了你 克莱登 - Come on, sir. - He's just killed you, Kryten!
先生 我们必须走了 Sir, we have to go!
你们不属于该舰船员 You are not registered as personnel of this vessel.
- 请说出你们的名字和通行码 - 是我们 霍利 - Please state your name and clearance code. - It's us, Hol!
请说出你们的名字和通行码 Please state your name and clearance code.
利斯特 大卫 000-169 Lister, D, 000-169.
没有你的掌纹记录 入侵警报 I have no record of your palm print. Intruder alert!
启动重写 Initiating override.
请说出你们的名字和通行码 Please state your name and clearance code.
登录名 克莱登 注册码 附加001 Logon name, Kryten. Registration code, Additional 001.
没有你的CPU识别记录 I have no record of your CPU ident.
我们不存在了 We don't exist any more.
催泪瓦斯 Tear gas!
谢天谢地是你们 Oh, thank God it's you guys.
只要动一下眉毛 你们就成狗肉了 Move so much as an eyebrow, boy, and you're dog meat.
什么 是我们啊 What? It's us!
你们是谁 想干什么 Who are you people? What do you want?
里默 是我 Rimmer, it's me.
你怎么知道我的名字 How do you know my name?
别上当 他可能在你制服上看到了 Don't fall for that one. Probably read it on your uniform.
先生 他们以前从没见过我们 Sir, they've never met us before.
我们是不同现实之间的虚无人士 We are limbo people between realities.
他们不记得我们 They have no memory of us.
我再问一次 你想干什么 So, I'm gonna ask you one more time. What do you want?
哟 我们不是敌人 Yo, we're not the enemy.
有个家伙在这附近 There's a guy around here somewhere
晃来晃去的 把人们从历史中抹去 wandering around obliterating people from history.
我们曾是你的船友 We used to be your shipmates.
只不过我们忘了你? Only we've forgotten you?
- 是啊 - 我不知道你怎么想 但我信了 - Yeah. - Well, I don't know about you, but I'm convinced.
- 里默 我认识你 - 如果你认识我 - Rimmer, I know you. - Well, if you do know,
那你应该知道我是那种强势顽固的硬汉 you'll know I'm the kind of rough and tumble, hardened astro,
前海军陆战队员 不吃你这一套 ex-marine type guy you do not trifle with.
不 你不是 No, you're not!
- 再说最后一次... - 菲奥娜·巴林顿 - For the last time... - Fiona Barrington.
15岁那年 你和她在你爸的温室里亲热 Fifteen years of age. You got off with her in your Dad's greenhouse.
你以为自己走桃花运了 结果发现 You thought you got lucky but it turned out all the time
你一直把手放在温暖的肥料里 that you had your hand in warm compost.
- 这我都知道 还能不认识你吗 - 不是这样的 - How could I know that and not know you? - Not true.
你有三个哥哥 约翰 霍华德 弗兰克 You got three brothers, John, Howard and Frank.
你很小气 是个彻头彻尾的懦夫 You're really mean. You're a tremendous physical coward.
你曾经在撒马利坦会接了一下午爱心电话 You once spent an afternoon on the Samaritans switchboard,
把四个人弄自杀了 and four people committed suicide.
你的中间名是犹大 但你都跟别人说是乔纳森 Your middle name's Judas. But you tell everyone that it's Jonathan.
你给所有正式信件的署名都是A·J·里默 BSc You sign all your official letters AJ Rimmer, BSc.
BSc表示游泳铜牌证书 BSc stands for Bronze Swimming Certificate.
你是个骗人 狡猾 卑鄙的人渣 You're a cheating, weaselly, lowlife scumbucket
魅力和社会风度堪比阴虱 with all the charm and social grace of a pubic louse.
不得不承认 伙计 他很了解你 Gotta admit, bud. He's got a handle on you there.
先生们 你们要帮帮我们 Sirs, you've got to help us.
审判官会不惜一切代价消灭我们 The Inquisitor will stop at nothing to obliterate us.
这些家伙是谁 里默 Who the smeg are these guys, Rimmer?
别管“这些家伙是谁” Never mind "Who the smeg are these guys?".
你他叉的是谁 Who the smeg are you?
我他叉是利斯特 I the smeg am Lister.
当然了 他是你的替代品 Of course. He's the alternative of you.
从未有机会存在过的大卫·利斯特之一 One of the many David Lister who never got a chance to exist.
那我们算是...精子兄弟? So we're kind of...sperms-in-law?
- 是的 先生 - 非常精准 先生 - Yes, sir. - Delicately put, sir.
- 那我们拿他们怎么办 - 我说干掉他们 - So what do we do with them? - I say waste them.
里默 你他叉别这样 Rimmer, for smeg's sake!
- 他真是个呆子 - 你跟我说? - He's such a dork. - You're tellin' me?
他们来这里编造一些荒诞的故事 They come here with some cock and bull story,
他们像西德尼·波蒂埃和托尼·柯蒂斯一样锁在一起 they're chained together like Sidney Poitier and Tony Curtis. 都是美国著名演员 在1958年电影《逃狱惊魂》中扮演一对被锁链缠在一起的越狱犯
我说就应该打开遗忘之门 把他们踢进去 I say open the door to oblivion and kick them through.
- 里默 谁也别杀谁 好吧 - 好吧 - Rimmer, no one's killing no one, all right? - Yeah, right.
听着 他们来自某种诡异的平行世界 Look, they're from some freaky alternative dimension.
他们来这里劫持这艘船 They've come here to hijack this ship
然后...对我们做奇怪的事 and do...ooh, weird things to us.
我想我们应该坐电梯 I think we should take the lift,
把他们带到安全甲板 关进禁闭室 put them in the security deck and stick them in the brig.
我不想这么说 但是就这一次 I hate to say it, but for once,
车轱辘鼻孔是对的 Trans Am wheel arch nostrils is right. 阿猫给里默的又一个外号
- 快走 - 你刚叫我什么 - Get moving. - What did you call me?
- 听着 你知道分数的 - 你怎么知道分数 - Look, you know the score. - Why do I know the score?
因为你就是我 我们从同一个枪管里射出来的 Because you're me. We're shot from the same gun barrel.
唯一区别是 一个用蛙泳 一个用自由泳 Only difference is, one did breast stroke, one did crawl.
你想说啥 What are you trying to say?
我是说 I'm saying...
就是他 伙计们 That's him, guys!
走这边 This way!
- 快点 我们走 - 我们回去 - Come on! Let's go! - Let's go back!
天呐 等一下 我可以用这个 快点走 Oh, my God! Hang on a minute. I can use this. Come on! Go!
如果我们到达运输甲板 If we got down to the transport decks,
也许可以抢一艘星虫 然后离开这里 maybe we can nick one of the Starbugs and get out of town.
啊哦 有门 我们最好走通风口 Uh-oh. A door. We better use an air vent.
- 不用了 - 先生? - No need. - Sir?
听着 我要做点恶心的事 非常恶心 Look, I'm gonna do something gross, that's totally gross.
不想让你看见 你转过去 Don't want you to look. Turn around.
- 什么事 - 相信我 你不会想知道的 - What? - Trust me, you don't wanna know.
逻辑上讲 先生 只有一种方式 Logically, sir, there is only one way
能让你打开那扇门 you could possibly have opened that door.
我觉得十分恶心 I feel quite nauseous.
- 在哪儿 - 什么在哪儿 - Where is it? - Where's what?
哦 先生 你居然把它放在你的夹克衫里 Oh, sir, you've got it in your jacket!
我把我们从货舱里就出来了 不是吗 I got us out of the hold, didn't I?
先生 你是个变态 你是个大大的变态 Sir, you are a sick... you are a sick, sick person.
你怎么能想出这种主意 How can you possibly conceive of such an idea?
闭嘴 不然我就用带血的那头打你 Shut up or I'll beat you with the wet end!
先生 如果机器人会呕吐 我现在已经吐到第五个袋子了 Sir, if mechanoids could barf, I'd be onto my fifth bag by now.
- 你是个变态 - 得了吧 克莱登 - You're a sick person! - Come on, Kryten!
有什么意义呢 我们何必还要努力摆脱这一切 What's the point? Why am I trying to get out of this?
我们已经知道自己失败了 We already know we fail.
不是这样 先生 我们只知道我死了 Not so, sir. All we know is that I die.
如果我的小策略最终能保证你的安全 Now if my small gambit ultimately results in your safety,
那就是值得的 then it will be a move well made.
对我自己来说 死亡无所畏惧 For myself, death holds no fear.
- 哦 是吗 - 先生 我的程序设定要求我不顾生命 - Oh, yeah? - Sir, I am programmed to relinquish my life.
所以4000系列机器人连续五年 That's why the mechnoid 4000 Series was voted
都被评选为年度最佳仿生人 "Android of the Year" five years running.
我对于拯救自己生命的兴趣 I have as much interest in saving my own life
就和一只长期抑郁的旅鼠一样 as a chronically depressed lemming.
这不是真的 对吧 现在不再是了 That's not true, is it? Not any more.
都是因为我 是我的错 And it's all because of me. It's my fault.
因为我让你突破了自己的程序 'Cause I made you break your programming.
我教你如何撒谎 如何自己做决定 I taught you how to lie, to make your own decisions.
我让你变得更...更有人性 I made you more...more human.
我让你顾惜自己的生命 I gave you a life to lose.
先生 恕我直言 这完全是胡扯 Sir, with the greatest respect, that is completely utter shash.
克莱登 我能看出你撒谎的样子 你的右脚在抖 Kryten, I know when you're lying. Your right foot jiggles.
- 那是无意识的 - 胡说 - It's involuntary. - Nonsense.
我不怕死 I'm not afraid to die.
我对死亡无所畏惧 For me, death holds no fear.
我相信硅基天堂 I believe in Silicon Heaven.
我相信仿生人死后能进天堂 I believe in an afterlife for androids!
- 你还打破那该死的手铐吗 - 克莱登 - Haven't you broken those damn manacles?! - Kryten!
我不会让它发生的 伙计 I'm not gonna let it happen, man.
因果循环 先生 那已经发生了 Cause and effect, sir. It already HAS happened.
我们无能为力 只能尽力救你的命 There's nothing we can do except to try and save your life.
好的 现在 我想我有这个 Okay, now, I think I have this.
这是英格玛解码系统的变体 It's a variant of the Enigma decoding system.
英格玛 英格是指英格玛啊 Enigma. "Enig" Enigma.
英格 对哦 我的遗言 "Enig". Of course. My last words.
哈 无论如何 如果这能成功 Ha! Anyway, if this thing works,
应该会让这手铐老化50万年 it should age those manacles by half a million years.
- 如果不成功呢 - 就会毁灭这个宇宙 - If it doesn't work? - It'll wipe out the universe.
- 呼 - 现在怎么办 - Phew! - What now?
我们有力量了 Well, now WE have the power.
好吧 我们不知道你们是谁 OK, we don't know who you are,
但是我们已经受够了那家伙 我们想站在你们这边 but we've seen enough of the other dude to know we wanna be on your side.
他残忍地杀害了我们的舰员 他是个禽兽 He killed our crew mates in cold blood. He's a monster.
我是阿猫 这是里默 I'm the Cat, this is Rimmer.
是啊 利斯特 克莱登 Yeah. Lister. Kryten.
听着 我想说清楚 Look, I want to make it clear.
我不是很喜欢和你们两个一起行动 I'm not exactly in love with the idea of pitching in with you two,
只是被逼的走投无路 but needs must as the devil drives.
你真的不记得我了 是吗 You really don't remember me, do you?
我曾经做的一切都是为了烦你 Everything I used to do to get on your pecks.
就像我用你的电动切肉机 Like I'd just be trimming me toenails
只是为了修脚趾甲一样 with your electric meat carver or something,
你肯定会气疯的 and you'd go absolutely spare.
先生 我们必须到储藏室 Sir, we really must get down to the storage bay.
记住我要交代的信息 Now, remember my message to it.
这就是我们与审判官最后对决的地方 That is where we meet the Inquisitor for the final confrontation.
这就是你的计划? 我们出去正面刚他? That's your plan? We go out there and face him?
好主意 我要在脸上画个靶心吗 Nice plan! Shall I paint a bull's-eye on my face?
听着 克莱登 我一直都在思考 Listen, Kryten. I've been thinking about this.
然后想到了什么 I've come up with something.
- 什么事 先生 - 我这辈子终于要动一次脑子了 - Yes, sir? - I'm gonna use my brains for the first time in my life.
考虑到现在的情况 先生 你真觉得这样明智吗 Considering the circumstances, sir, do you really believe that's wise?
- 把手套给我 - 但你不会用 - Give me the gauntlet. - But you don't know how to use it.
你必须喊出指示 对吧 You'll have to shout instructions, won't you?
如果我戴上不是更简单吗 Wouldn't it be simpler if I wore it?
- 你不能戴 克莱登 - 为什么 - You can't wear it, Kryten. - Why not?
你的程序要求你不能杀人 You're programmed not to kill.
凡人企图挑战我的统治地位 So, the mortals seek to challenge my mastery.
克莱登 我不会用 Kryten, I don't know how to work this thing.
伽马 德尔塔 一 四 五 Gamma, delta, one, four, five.
- 他叉的 你把我变小了 - 游戏开始了 - Smeg. You youthed me. - The sport begins.
你他叉的对我做了什么 Now what the smeg have you done to me?
打扰一下 我能占用你一点时间吗 Excuse me. Could I just distract you for a brief second?
哈 Huh?
打扰一下 我能占用你一点时间吗 "Excuse me. Could I possibly just distract you for a brief second"?!
这是我即兴发挥的最好水平了 先生 It was the best I could ad-lib at the time, sir.
- 他抓住了阿猫和里默 - 我知道 - He got the Cat and Rimmer, though. - I know.
听着 先生 我必须回到过去 牺牲自己 Look, sir, I've got to go back in time and sacrifice myself
这样我们才能进入现在这个烂摊子 in order that we can get into this mess we're in now in the first place.
对哦 是的 Yeah, sure.
总而言之 今天过得有点糟 不是吗 先生 All in all, today's been a bit of a bummer, hasn't it, sir?
他要多久才能解冻 10分钟? How long before he unfreezes? Ten minutes?
不 8.4分钟 No. 8.4.
- 我们最好是对的 克莱登 - 我知道 手套 - We'd better be right, Kryten. - I know. Gauntlets.
那么 当我从审判官身后跳出来的时候 该说什么 Now, what do I say when I pop up behind the Inquisitor?
额 “好极了 现在我该...” Er, "Perfect. Now what do I..."
就是这样 我知道了 别告诉我 我有数了 That's it. I've got it. Don't tell me. I've got it.
好 大块头 时间到了 OK, big fella. It's dangling time.
欢迎上线 Welcome back on-line.
你在做什么 What are you doing?
不管怎样 你今天下午杀了我很多朋友 One way or the other, you killed a lot of my friends this afternoon.
实际上 你将永远会是我的敌人 In fact, you may never get on my good side again.
- 哎呀 - 所以你现在要杀了我? - Oops. - So now you're going to kill me?
我不认同 I don't think so.
你是个每种的小胖子 You're a fat little human who doesn't have the balls.
悬在深渊上的人还说这话 真蠢 Dumb talk for a guy who's dangling over a chasm.
我看透了你的内心 你没这胆量 I've seen inside your heart. You don't have it in you.
哦 是吗 Oh, yeah?
用你的命来赌? Bet your life?
- 我从没想过要杀你 - 是吗 - I never intended to kill you. - Oh, no?
没有 我只想救你的命 No. I intended to save your life.
救我? 为什么? Save my life? Why?
因为如果我救了你 你消除了我 'Cause if I save your life, and you erase me,
我就不能在这里救你了 你就会死 I won't be there to save your life, and you'll die.
好好想想吧 伙计 Chew on that, pal.
你要把我的手套给我? You're giving me my gauntlet back?
我没事的 你不会动我 I'm all right. You can't touch me.
你可能会杀了其他人 但不会动我 You might've killed the others, but I'm OK.
哦 还有一件事 Oh, just one thing.
如果我把你从历史中抹了 If I erase you from history,
你根本就不会在这里威胁我的生命 you will never have existed to threaten my life in the first place.
是有道理 That's a point.
实际上 我消除你也会非常安全 So, in fact, I can erase you quite safely.
是的 Yeah.
是哦 这是老一套的逆火时间手套技巧 Yeah! It's the old backfiring time gauntlet trick.
你刚刚给自己买了一张通往遗忘之门的单程票 You just bought yourself a one-way ticket to oblivion.
但是你不能 我所有的光荣之举都会付诸东流 But you can't! All my glorious work will be undone!
- 成功了吗 - 成功了吗 - Oh, it worked! - It worked?
- 克莱登 你是个天才 - 是你的谋略 先生 - Kryten, you're a genius. - It was your scheme, sir.
- 我只是重写了手套的程序 - 那现在怎么办 - I simply re-programmed the gauntlet. - So what now?
基本上 我们等着 Well, basically, we wait for
时空连续体修复自身就行了 the time-space continuum to reorder itself.
我觉得现在你可以 I believe this is an appropriate juncture
跟我拍个手掌了 先生 for you to give me five, sir.
拍一个手掌? 可以有更好的 Give you five? I can do better than that.
拍三个手掌 I can give you fifteen.
外面天寒地冻 还没有大气层 # It's cold outside, there's no kind of atmosphere
我孤单一人 差不多在独自徘徊 # I'm all alone, more or less
让我飞吧 离这远远的 # Let me fly far away from here
去找乐子呀 # Fun, fun, fun
就在太阳里寻找 # In the sun, sun, sun
我想摊成一坨废物 # I want to lie, shipwrecked and comatose
喝着新鲜的芒果汁 # Drinking fresh mango juice
让金鱼给我足底按摩 # Goldfish shoals, nibbling at my toes
去找乐子呀 # Fun, fun, fun
就在太阳里找 # In the sun, sun, sun
乐无穷呀 # Fun, fun, fun
太阳里乐无穷 # In the sun, sun, sun #