nonverbals are anything that communicates but is not a word the 非语言是可以交流但不是单词的任何事物
public knows them as body language how we dress how we walk have meaning and we 公众将他们理解为肢体语言，我们如何穿衣走路具有意义，我们
use that to interpret what's in the mind of the person my name is Joe Navarro and 用它来解释我叫乔·纳瓦罗（Joe Navarro）的人的想法
for 25 years I was a special agent with the FBI my job was to catch spies most 25年来，我一直是联邦调查局的特工，我的工作是抓间谍
of my career I spent within the National Security Division a lot of it had to do 我在国家安全部门工作的大部分时间都要做
with looking at specific targets and then it was about well how do we get in 着眼于特定目标，然后就可以很好地进入
their heads and how do we neutralize them our security is based on nonverbals 他们的头以及我们如何消除他们的安全性是基于非语言
we look at the person through the peephole we look at who's behind us at 我们通过窥视孔看那个人，看看谁在后面
the ATM machine we know from the research that most of us select our 从研究中得知的ATM机，我们大多数人选择
mates based on nonverbal so we may think we're very sophisticated but in fact we 基于非语言的伙伴，所以我们可能认为我们很老练，但实际上我们
are never in a state where we're not transmitting information there's a lot 从来没有处于我们不传输信息的状态
of myths out there the ones that stand out is if you cross your arms that it's 神话中最突出的是，如果你双臂交叉，那是
a blocking behavior that's just nonsense even when you don't like the person that 即使你不喜欢那个人，也只是胡说八道
is in front of you this isn't to block them out it's actually to self-soothe 在你面前这不是要阻止他们，而是要自我放松
because in essence it's a self hug when you're sitting at a movie and you're 因为从本质上讲，这是您坐在电影院时的自我拥抱
watching you're gonna cross your arms you're waiting for somebody you tend to 看着你会双臂交叉，正在等待你倾向于的人
do this what's interesting is we do this behavior more in public than in private 做到这一点有趣的是，我们在公共场所比在私人场所中更多地进行这种行为
the other one that really stands out is as we think about something we may look 另一个真正脱颖而出的是当我们思考我们可能看起来的东西时
in a certain way as we process the information we may look in another way 以某种方式处理信息时，我们可能会以另一种方式查看
it's certainly not indicative of deception and it really shouldn't be 这当然不是欺骗的指示，它实际上不应该是
used that way all we can say is the person is processing the information the 用这种方式，我们只能说是人正在处理信息，
other misconceptions are that if the person clears her throat touches their 其他误解是，如果该人清了清嗓子，就会触碰他们。
nose or covers their mouth they're lined we do these behaviors as self soothers 鼻子或嘴巴被他们排成一排，我们作为自慰者来做这些行为
they're they're pacifying behaviors scientifically 他们是科学地平息行为
and empirically there's just no Pinocchio effect and people who prattle 从经验上讲，没有匹诺曹效应，而且人们会说话
that and say well we can detect deception because the person touches 并说好，我们可以检测到欺骗，因为该人触摸
their nose or covers their mouth that's just sheer nonsense we humans are 他们的鼻子或嘴巴只是胡说八道
lousy a detecting deception espionage work is often nowhere near what we see 糟糕的检测欺骗间谍活动通常远不及我们所看到的
in movies and in one of the cases we had information from another country saying 在电影中，在一种情况下，我们从另一个国家/地区获得了信息
you have an American we think is actually a mole who somehow entered the 你有一个美国人，我们认为实际上是一个以某种方式进入
United States is able to pass as an American but he's here working for a 美国能够通过成为美国人，但他在这里为
hostile intelligence service and just fortuitously he was videographed 敌对情报部门，只是很幸运，他被录了下来
coming out of a flower shop we're looking at the video and everybody in in 从一家花店出来，我们正在看视频，每个人都在
our small unit we were saying well there's not much there you know he's 我们的小单位，我们说的很好，那里你知道他没有多少
coming out of the shop getting in his car and I said stop the film right there 从商店出来坐上他的车，我说要在那里停下来看电影
just as he came out of the shop he took the flowers and most Americans tend to 就像他从商店里出来时一样，他拿着鲜花，大多数美国人倾向于
hold the flowers buy the stock so the flowers are up this individual took them 拿着花买股票，这样花就涨了这个人接了他们
and grabbed the stock and then held the flowers so that they were facing down 抢了股票，然后拿着花，使它们朝下
and I said that's how they carry flowers in Eastern Europe rather than confront 我说那是他们在东欧举花而不是面对的方式
him about are you a spy I decided to do what's called a presumptive so as I sat 他关于你是间谍我决定做所谓的推定
there with him and I said would you like to know how we know and he had this look 和他在一起，我说你想知道我们怎么知道，他看起来很像
on his face and and I said it was the flowers and then he confessed when I 在他的脸上，我说那是花朵，然后当我承认他承认
came into law enforcement I thought it was all about the confession it's really 进入执法部门，我认为这完全是关于认罪的事实
about face time in my 25 years in the FBI 关于我在联邦调查局25年的工作时间
it was a rarity that a person didn't eventually reveal what I needed to know 一个人最终没有透露我需要知道的东西是很罕见的
because we would sit down and have these very lengthy conversations I look at 因为我们会坐下来进行漫长的对话
behaviors to do an assessment what is this person transmitting in relations to 进行评估的行为此人在与他人的关系中传达了什么
any stimuli further questioning comes from my 任何进一步的质疑来自我
observing these behaviors the first thing I look at is I look at the hair 观察这些行为我首先要看的是头发
does it look healthy does it look well-groomed the forehead is very 它看起来健康吗？额头整齐吗？
interesting because a lot of times we reveal stress a lot of the things that 有趣，因为很多时候我们揭示了很多压力
we have gone through life are often itched in the forehead I look at the 我们经历过的人生常常被额头痒，我看着
eyes to see if they're red or not enough sleep this small area here between the 眼睛看他们是不是红色还是睡眠不足
eyes called the glabella it's one of the first areas that reveals information to 眼睛被称为glabella，它是最早揭示信息的区域之一
us most often when we don't like something we do that bunny knows of I 我们最经常在我们不喜欢做某事的时候，那个兔子知道我
don't like we don't really know what our lips look like and we tend to compress 不喜欢我们真的不知道我们的嘴唇看起来像什么，我们倾向于压缩
them when something bothers us when something really bothers us we tend to 他们，当某事困扰我们时，当某事真正困扰我们时，我们倾向于
suck them in the mandibular and look at the cheeks we may do something like this 吮吸他们的下颌，看着脸颊，我们可能会做这样的事情
will will rub our tongue against the inside of the cheek but when we try to 会在舌头内侧摩擦我们的舌头，但是当我们尝试
hide it then it tells me that this person is trying to do some perception 隐藏它然后告诉我这个人正在尝试做一些感知
management and if they are I want to know why at the neck I want to see if 管理，如果他们是我，我想知道为什么在脖子上我想看看
there's any head tilt because head tilt the person is more relaxed the minute 因为头倾斜会使人在这一分钟内更加放松，所以有头倾斜
the head tilt goes away there's usually some issue I'm looking at the shoulders 头部倾斜消失了，通常我在肩膀上看到一些问题
you ask somebody a question and they don't know both shoulders shoot up very 你问别人一个问题，他们不知道双肩都挺起来
quickly and then when I look at the hands too 很快，然后当我看着双手时
when something's troubling us we tend to stiffen our fingers interlace them and 当某些事情困扰着我们时，我们倾向于使手指僵硬，将它们交织在一起，
almost like a teepee we move our hands back and forth very slowly this is to be 就像帐篷一样，我们非常缓慢地来回移动双手
differentiated from when we do the steeple which we do in this position 与我们在这个位置做尖顶的时间不同
when something's at issue we tend to put our hands on our hips and we become very 当有问题时，我们倾向于把手放在臀部上，我们变得非常
territorial this is called arms akimbo but look how it changes when we put our 领土这被称为两手叉腰，但是当我们把
thumbs forward and then it becomes one of more of I'm inquisitive but I also 大拇指向前，然后它成为我好奇的更多人之一，但我也
look for any behaviors of ventilating because men 寻找通风的行为，因为男人
to ventilate at the neck and we do at the very instant something bothers us 通风在脖子上，我们马上就做了一些困扰我们的事情
and then I look at the legs to see if there's any brushing of the legs with 然后我看着腿，看看是否有刷牙的腿
the hands which is again to pacify and then the feet do I see any behaviors 再次安抚的手，然后脚看到任何行为
such as wiggling of the feet kicking of the feet if I ask a question and all of 例如，如果我问一个问题，脚扭动着脚踢，
a sudden the feet withdraw and are crossed 突然脚退缩了
perhaps the person feels a little threatened by that question so when we 也许这个问题让这个人感到有点威胁，所以当我们
study nonverbals it's not about making judgments 学习非语言不是要做出判断
it's about assessing what is this person transmitting in that moment it really is 这是关于评估此人在那一刻真正传达的信息
looking at an individual and saying what are they transmitting we're all 看着一个人，说他们在传达什么，我们都是
transmitting at all times we choose the clothes that we wear how we groom 在任何时候都传输我们选择我们穿着的衣服如何修饰
ourselves how we dress but also how do we carry ourselves are we coming to the 自己，我们如何穿衣，但我们也如何进行自我，我们来了
office on this particular day with a lot of energy or are we coming ins with a 在这个特殊的日子里充满活力的办公室，还是我们有一个
different sort of pace and what we look for our differences in behavior down to 不同的步调以及我们寻找的行为差异
the the minutiae of what is this individual's posture as they're walking 这个人走路时姿势的细节
down the street are they on the inside of the sidewalk on the outside can we 在街上，他们在外面的人行道上吗
see his blink rate can we see how often he's looking at his watch I know your 看看他的眨眼速度，我们可以看看他多久看一次手表吗，我知道你
blink rate is around eight eight times a minute 眨眼速度大约是一分钟八八次
but you don't know that you're not sitting there counting all these things 但是你不知道你没有坐在那里数所有这些东西
factor in because they're transmitting information now it's up to us to then 因为他们现在正在传输信息，这取决于我们当时
use that information to say okay we need to marshal resources to be on that 用这些信息说好吧，我们需要调拨资源
individual right now 现在是个人
so in most Western cultures the first time people touch is when they shake 所以在大多数西方文化中，人们第一次接触是在摇动时
hands touching becomes that important because we can always remember a time 触摸手变得非常重要，因为我们可以永远记住一个时间
when we shook hands with someone and we didn't like that it's also the first 当我们与某人握手时，我们不喜欢那也是第一次
time when our bodies release these bonding chemicals that say I like this 我们的身体释放这些粘合化学物质的时间，说我喜欢
person or I don't like this person so hand shaking is both necessary and 人或我不喜欢这个人，所以握手既有必要，又
essential in most cultures ladies hi I'm Joe Navarro Laura how are you and you 在大多数文化中必不可少的女士们嗨，我叫乔·纳瓦罗·劳拉
are Katina how are you let me ask you this let's back up a little bit is this 卡蒂娜，你好吗，让我问你，这让我们备份一点是这个
comfortable for you yeah it's a little bit more comfortable but it's not for 对你来说很舒服，是的，它有点舒服，但不是
you is it all right thank you all right so keep talking what we've done here is 你没事吧，谢谢你没事，所以继续谈论我们在这里所做的是
we've talked about the importance of space and comfort they don't realize is 我们已经讨论了他们没有意识到的空间和舒适度的重要性
how much further apart they are now standing and it's because we have 他们现在站的距离有多远，这是因为我们有
brought this subject up to make them comfortable about saying hey it's okay 提出了这个主题，使他们对说嘿可以自在
to be comfortable at your perfect distance and so now we see when they 在您的理想距离舒适，所以现在我们看到他们何时
rock they rock away from each other and they create this space if you notice 晃动它们彼此晃动，如果您注意到，它们会创建此空间
their feet tend to move around more there's a dynamic going on here where 他们的脚倾向于四处走动，这里有动态
they're kind of trying to find well what is the perfect space what is the perfect 他们试图找到合适的空间什么是完美的
distance and we know that they're unsettled because of the high degree of 距离，我们知道由于高度的
movement that's that's going on 就是这样的运动
pokers an interesting game the similitudes 扑克有趣的游戏
of sitting across from a spy or sitting across from players it's their reactions 坐在间谍对面或坐在玩家对面是他们的反应
to a stimulus we have behaviors indicative of psychological discomfort 刺激我们有表明心理不适的行为
that we use at home at work or at the poker table so we're gonna take a look 我们在家工作或在扑克桌上使用的方式，我们来看看
at poker players and some of the body language that you'll find at a typical 扑克玩家以及一些典型的肢体语言
poker game so we'll pause it right there so one of the things that you first 扑克游戏，所以我们将其暂停在那里，所以您首先要做的一件事情
notice is that when a table is called this is the first time any of them see 注意，当一个表被调用时，这是他们中的任何一个第一次看到
each other this is a great opportunity to be looking for behaviors indicative 彼此，这是寻找指示行为的好机会
of discomfort we're gonna see the individual shifting in his chair we're 感到不适的是，我们会看到个人在椅子上移动
gonna see one individual reaching over and grabbing his shoulder the woman in 会看到一个人伸手抓住那个女人的肩膀
this case her shoulders are rather high this is a great opportunity even before 这种情况下她的肩膀很高，这甚至是一个很好的机会
the game starts to collect poker intelligence so we'll stop right there 游戏开始收集扑克情报，所以我们就停在那里
look where their hands are at here we're looking at player number two and number 看他们的手在这里，我们看第二号和第二号
three and we notice right away that their hands are on top of the cards some 三个，我们马上注意到他们的手在纸牌上
players will cage their cards some players will put their hands directly on 玩家将卡住自己的牌，一些玩家将直接将手放在
top and press them down and they may do that because the cards have now 顶部并向下按它们，他们可能会这样做，因为卡片现在
increased in value player number one tends to keep his hands very close to 增加了价值的玩家的数量往往会使他的手非常接近
his body player number four she's actually withdrawn her hands from the 他的第四号身体球员实际上已经从
table because when we like things we tend to move our hands forward when we 餐桌，因为当我们喜欢事物时，当我们喜欢时，我们往往会向前移动
don't like things we tend to move the hands away so as we look at player 不喜欢事物时，我们倾向于将手移开，以便我们观察玩家
number three I'm often asked about players who shuffle their chips what 我经常被问到第三位洗牌的玩家
you're really doing is self soothing and this just helps you to make it through 你真正在做的是自我安慰，这只会帮助你通过
the game and that's really all we're looking for 游戏，这就是我们想要的全部
okay so we'll stop right there player number five is sitting there arms 好吧，我们就停在那里，第五号球员坐在那儿，双臂
crossed you don't see a lot of activity that doesn't mean he's not transmitting 越过你看不到很多活动，这并不意味着他没有传播
a lot of information on down the line I want to see where those thumbs of his 我想看看他的那些拇指在哪里的很多信息
are because he holds them very close when nothing's going on but does that 是因为当什么都没发生时，他将它们保持得很近，但是
change as the game evolves if you're looking at nonverbals it's often useful 随着游戏的发展而变化，如果您正在研究非语言的话，它通常会很有用
to look at them at double the speed because all the nonverbals that are 以两倍的速度看着它们，因为所有非语言的
critical jump out at you as though it were a caricature all right so stop 关键跳出来，好像它是一个漫画，所以停下来
right there the woman in position number four you see her head moving around 就在那个四号位的女人，你看到她的头在移动
quite a bit player number three you see of a lot of 相当多的三号球员，你会看到很多
activity with his hands when we look at player number five now his hands are 当我们看第五号球员时，他的手正在活动
fully out this is as far as we've seen them before at this point we know that 到目前为止，据我们所知，
he's engaged and that he's interested now the game is out in the open 他订婚了，现在对他很感兴趣，比赛是公开的
75 to 80 percent of the information we need is sitting out there what you often 我们需要的信息中有75％到80％位于您经常遇到的地方
see is everybody's looking at their own cards or looking at the community cards 看到每个人都在看自己的卡片或社区卡片
rather than looking around you should be looking around to see what was the 而不是环顾四周，您应该环顾四周，看看有什么
reaction because you're gonna see that reaction again you know in poker we used 反应，因为您将再次看到该反应，您在我们使用的扑克中知道
to say that you can have a poker face but I encountered you can't have a poker 说你可以拥有一张扑克脸，但是我遇到了你不能拥有一张扑克
body somewhere it's gonna be revealed when I was in college in the early 70s 70年代初我上大学时，某个地方的尸体会被发现
there were really no courses on nonverbal communications you quickly 您很快就没有关于非语言交流的课程
realize that to a great extent it's really about what you can interpret from 意识到在很大程度上，这实际上是您可以从中解释的内容
behavior and so we talk about non verbals because it matters because it 行为，所以我们谈论非语言，因为它很重要，因为它
has gravitas because it affects how we communicate with each other and when it 有引力，因为它影响我们彼此之间的交流方式以及时间
comes to non verbals this is no small matter we primarily communicate 谈到非语言，这是我们主要交流的小问题
non-verbally and we always will 非言语，我们将永远