Narrator: Deep in the heart of Africa
is a place no man has ever entered.
A place that belongs to the lion, the elephant and the ape.
A place known as the bukuvu.
Travelers flying overhead can only glimpse at its many marvels:
Its sparkling rivers,
its lush veldts,
its billowy cloud formations
and its hidden mountains.
- Never fear, my friends. - George! George!
All was not lost.
Scraped and boo-booed, they searched high and low,
but they never recovered their most precious cargo.
George, George George of the jungle
strong as he can be
watch out for that tree
George, George George of the jungle
lives a life that's free
watch out for that tree
when he gets in a scrape he makes his escape
with help from his friend an ape named ape
and his elephant shep can fetch a log
he's man's best friend he's George's dog
he's George, George George of the jungle
strong as he can be
watch out for that tree
hear him holler swing and sing
all the animals come to the jungle king
George, George George of the jungle
so grab a vine and swing in time
if you smack a tree just pay no mind
like George, George George of the jungle
strong as he can be
watch out for that tree
watch out for that bang! Ooh!
Tree
George, George George of the jungle
watch out for that tree
narrator: Twenty-five years later, the bouncing baby boy
has grown into a swinging jungle king.
He is swift. He is strong.
He is sure. He is smart.
He is unconscious.
Meanwhile, 43 vines away,
George's kingdom was being threatened by a terrifying intruder.
Hi, everybody. Me again.
Third day in mbwebwe. Look at this incredible...
- Banyan tree. - Banyan tree. And look what's in it.
Could you die?
And over here
is the outhouse, which you don't want to see, believe me.
By the way, Betsy, thank you so much for those moist towelettes.
They've been a lifesaver.
And these are the wonderful porters. Wave, guys.
And this is our guide, Mr. kwame.
Without him, we would be lost. Hi.
This is great.
And this is... Lyle!
Hello, bujumburans.
What are you doing here?
What kind of greeting is that to give your fiancé?
Aren't you happy to see me? Yeah! Of course I am.
The jungle loves you. You're beautiful.
How did you find me?
Well, I just hired the two best trackers in the business.
Aah! I'm chafing, Max.
Ah, yeah, I'm chafing big time.
Didn't I tell you not to wear 20 pounds of black leather in the jungle?
- Didn"t I tell ya? - Ah.
Cotton, I said. Cotton breathes.
Take my things to the lady's tent and shake a leg.
Narrator: Later that night, Lyle Van de groot
lost no time in making arrangements
to whisk his wayward fiancée back home.
I'll take it. Nairobi Hilton. They can airlift us there in two hours.
Pillows, okay?
Wait a second. I'm losing you. Bad reception here.
Okay, I've got you back. No, wait! I'm losing you!
My batteries are dead! No! Doody!
I don't want to go anyway, Lyle.
Tomorrow we're gonna climb the mountain where the big apes are.
Don't you wanna see them?
Only if they can shake a good gin Martini without bruising it.
How!
Me and Thor here would be happy to help you
and the lady up the mountain, Mr. Van de groot.
- Yeah. - Mr. kwame leading the way, of course.
If you don't mind me saying so,
the apes are supposed to be a fascinating sight,
especially that white ape.
White ape? What's that?
Ask Mr. kwame. I bet he can tell you.
Kwame: It is only a native legend.
Ursula: Could you please tell us?
The people say he is over seven feet tall,
with the strength of a lion.
When the moon is full and the air is sweet,
he wanders alone through the jungle,
piercing the silence of the valley with his mournful call.
Now, some say he is thirsty for blood.
Others say he is calling for the mate that he longs for,
but will never find.
By day, he rules the entire bukuvu from the top of the mountain.
But by night...
He and bigfoot run the candy counter at the bukuvu cineplex.
Now playing on all 14 screens: Planet of the apes.
Bigfoot?
Max, that'd be worth a lot more than any white...
Lyle: Ursula, what are we doing here?
Lyle, I came all this way...
Okay, okay. The things I do for you.
Looks like we're on, fellows.
Narrator: As the sun Rose over ape mountain,
its agitated inhabitants sent an urgent message to George by bongo-gram,
warning the jungle king that intruders were close afoot.
Ooh. Lyle, listen. What was that?
Could be the mating call of the white ape.
White ape. Sounds like a drink.
Yes, bartender. I'll have two black Russians and a white ape.
Narrator: A drink the venal Van de groot would be begging to imbibe
if he only knew how near the white ape was at that very moment,
flying through the foliage, surveying the scenery,
cruising in for a closer look, swinging through the trees with effortless ease.
George: Ow!
And so, onward and upward the tired trekkers trudged
on feverish footsies over perilous paths.
When they finally beheld the mighty ape mountain, they reacted with awe.
All: Aww.
Narrator: I said "awe." A-w-e.
- All: Ooh! - Narrator: That's better.
Kwame: Single file on the bridge. Step very cautiously.
It is full of rotten planks. One false move, you could fall over.
Then you will have a very long time to wave good-bye.
Don't you worry, peanut. I was on a bridge like this in Maui.
It was steady as a rock. See?
Kwame: Stop! Stop that!
I got you.
No!
Narrator: Don't worry. Nobody dies in this story.
They just get really big boo-boos.
What did I tell you?
They shouldn't let inexperienced guides like that on these treks.
Mm-hmm.
Did you see the look that guy just gave me?
Probably saying I'm the biggest jerk they've ever seen in their lives.
Probably trying to think of something evil to do to me.
Aah!
If they turn on us, we're never gonna get home.
It's up to me to make the peace. I'm going in.
Gentlemen. Cigar? Cigarette?
Okay, gifts from America.
- Lyle: I give you a cigar, - Hey, hey.
You give me some of your lands.
All right. My first contact has been made.
Ready, aim...
Lyle: There you go, my man.
You like magic fire? Do ya?
Well, get a load of that.
There you go. Magic picture.
Yet another gift from America. Here you go.
You're welcome.
Thirty-five millimeters.
Translation, please.
He says that he likes your magic pictures,
but he prefers the resolution of the Leica 35-millimeter transparency.
He also says your lens is dirty, but he has the equipment to clean it for you.
Well, tell him to clean this while he's at it.
Come on, let's go. “Where?
To find you an ape, so we can get the heck outta here.
Lyle, we can't go into the jungle alone. We could get lost out here.
It's my job to get you what you want.
You want a double decaf latte with mocha sprinkles,
you will get a double decaf latte with mocha sprinkles.
You want a white ape, I'll get you a white ape.
Here, monkey, monkey, monkey.
Here, gorilla, gorilla. Come on.
_shh.
- Don't move. - I actually found one? It worked?
Hmm.
- God, that scared me. - Scared me, too.
I'm gonna go get help. You wait here.
Oh, no.
Aaah!
Here, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty.
Ooh! Ooh!
Eww! When lion brush last?
Don't tickle. Don't tickle.
I'll...
Rubber tree always good for clothesline. Upsy, kitty.
George not even trying hard.
Flying pile driver.
Having some fun now.
Bad kitty!
- That close one, huh? - Watch out for that tree!
Huh?
Oops.
Hmm?
Hmm. Funny-looking fella.
The white ape.
U-u-Ursula! Ursula!
Ursula, I found your scrunchie.
Lyle: Go away!
It was horrible.
An almost 400-pound white ape man.
The white ape has my girlfriend.
I held him off as long as I could. Blood everywhere.
The white ape got my girlfriend.
He weighs 400 pounds.
The white ape got my girlfriend!
The white ape got... help! Help!
Man needs help!
Narrator: After a night of feverish fantasies,
the perfectly permed heiress, Ursula stanhope,
awoke to the melodious music of the bukuvu bird life
and found herself venturing forth in search of that defender of the innocent,
protector of the weak
and all-around good guy, George of the jungle.
But that's not who she saw first.
“What!
Get away! Get away! Get away!
Hmm?
Hello.
Oh, dear.
Feeling better, fella?
Okay. It's that dream, then.
I'm still having that psycho dream. Hello.
Oh, no, no! Don't worry! Ape friend.
Ape make your breakfast. “What does it want? What does it want?
"It" wants its physician's desk reference, if you don't mind.
Unless you'd rather die of dengue fever, of course.
- That is very funny! - Ha, ha, ha.
I thought I heard the monkey talk.
But that is totally understandable, right?
I mean, why wouldn't an ape read textbooks?
And why wouldn't I find myself in a tree house
with room service and a Tarzan wannabe, wearing a, um
what do you call that thing?
- Butt flap. - Right.
Oh...
Ay!
Ooh! Mmm.
- Ape: Bit of a shock, I suppose. Yes. - Fever.
Cold compress. Dab her lightly, George. "Talking monkey."
That's the ticket. Good.
Huh?
Huh? Something funny about this fella.
She's not a "fella," George. She's a woman, the female of your species.
You mean ape and George not brothers?
Well, in a sense, we are related.
After all, we're both members of the primate family.
Primate family. Brothers.
I suppose one might claim...
Mommy, make that monkey stop talking.
Perhaps I should refrain from speaking around her, as it seems to upset her.
- What your name? - Ursula.
Ursula stanhope.
- Who are you? - George.
George primate.
And that brother ape. Ape primate.
Ah! Oh, um...
Okay, I'm gonna pass out again now.
Bye.
Aah!
It's a sissy white ape. I would've choked the life out of him,
except that he had two of his lion buddies jump me from behind.
So in this version, there are two lions with the white ape?
A minute ago, there was only one.
Hey, the important thing, kwame, is that I was outnumbered.
Absolutely.
Hi.
When I woke up this morning, I remembered about that lion,
and I know you saved me yesterday.
- And I just wanted to say thank you. - Ah!
Ooh!
Now I'm feeling better, I realize the others must think I'm cat food by now.
And I don't want my fian... This guy that I was with, to worry.
So I should probably go and look for them.
- I was wondering if you could help me. - Ursula want to go already?
Okay, George help. Get trusty doggy.
Oh, you have a dog. That's great.
Doggy will help find friends. George call shep.
Shep! Here boy!
Come on!