THE LAST TIME I SAW MACAO
Thirty years later I'm on my way to Macao
where I haven't been since I was a child.
A little over a week ago, in Lisbon,
I got an e-mail from a friend I hadn't heard from in ages.
I knew that Candy had left to the Far East,
lured by the exoticism
or by an easier life, I'm not sure...
The only thing I knew was that I had lost her trace.
In the e-mail she told me that
she had been involved yet again with the wrong men,
except now the consequences were Very serious:
a good friend of hers had been murdered during some harmless "war games",
She thought she might be the next victim
and I was the only person who she could still trust.
She asked me to go to Macao
where some "strange and scary things" were happening,
as she put it.
Candy gave me precise instructions about the place I should stay at
and begged me not to tell anyone about my arrival.
My name is Guerra da Mata.
Tired, after a long flight,
I'm approaching Macao aboard the jetfoil which will take me back
to the happiest time in my life.
This is Macao, an ex-Portuguese colony that never really was.
Singular and bizarre,
it is a crossroads for people of different races and nationalities
who come here to try their luck.
Macao never stops.
It is the city with the world's highest population density
and also the city where you can feel the loneliest.
An architectural jungle flaunting two faces,
like the coins that the slot machines swallow at breakneck pace,
one calm and smiling,
the other veiled and secretive.
The fascinating Las Vegas of the East
is the friendliest and cruelest of cities
where nothing is what it seems.
As an old Chinese proverb says:
"Gold cannot be pure
and men cannot be perfect."
I arrived while the 11th National People's Congress of China
was taking place in Beijing.
I read in the Hong Kong newspaper that I bought at the airport:
"The slogan, harmonious society,
exhaustively repeated by Chinese leaders in former years,
has disappeared from the official discourse."
Does the taxi driver know that the television's picture is upside down?
I'd thought of coming back before the return of sovereignty
on 20th December 1999.
The Handover, as they say here.
Now Macao, the lotus flower of the East, is Chinese,
after more than 400 years of Portuguese rule.
The Portuguese, empty-handed and with Apollo-like faces,
look with a slight smile upon China, and its impassive and timid expression,
as if to deny the country's eternal and real dominion over the territory.
Amongst Christmas lights and carols,
I blend into the flow of privileged Chinese tourists.
They managed to get visitors' permits
to glimpse the West through this Macanese keyhole.
In the centre of the city's most iconic square,
covered in Portuguese cobblestones during the final years of our rule,
I come across a portrait of Mao Tse-Tung
posing with workers, soldiers and peasants
for a souvenir of the euphoric Cultural Revolution.
As if History could be erased
with a simple click of the dozens of cameras
that obsessively freeze the memory and fantasize happiness.
Even the Astro Boy of my youth
seems to have been invited to the festivities.
I helped myself to a Duty Free whisky
and waited for the phone call, as arranged.
On the television I heard a song from a time
I thought everyone wanted to forget.
Baby, it's Candy.
Candy, darling, I've missed you...
I'm glad you've come. I knew I could count on you.
So what's happening?
I'll tell you later. Now listen carefully:
you have to meet a friend of mine, A-Kan right now
in the pedestrian street between Rua de Pequim and Rua de Shanghai.
He has a black leather jacket. He'll wait for you
in front of the sex shop. He'll bring you to me.
But Candy...
I've got to hang up, love. Be careful...
I had to cross the city as quickly as possible.
I wanted to take a rickshaw,
but rickshaws are no longer a means of transport;
just bait for tourists.
I caught a taxi,
one of thousands of vehicles that clog up the city every day.
There were tiger lanterns everywhere.
The Chinese Zodiac says that people
born under the sign of the Tiger are ambitious, brave and dedicated
but also aggressive and implacable.
They make good leaders and warriors.
Macao seems to have been overrun by an army of playful tigers...
As I predicted,
traffic was chaotic and I was stuck in a traffic jam.
I'd arrive late at the rendezvous.
I couldn't warn Candy;
I had left my mobile in my jacket pocket back at the hotel.
I decided to get out and walk.
Macao is not that big.
I gave the driver 50 patacas and didn't wait for the change.
The streets all looked the same.
I got lost. I asked for directions but no-one could understand me.
Four centuries of Portuguese presence in Macao
and no-one speaks Portuguese...
When I finally found the street, Mr. A-Kan had already left.
You should have returned to the hotel
to try and talk to Candy.
If you had met that night everything could have been different.
If only time had stopped that night...
I went back to the hotel.
I had several missed calls and a text from Candy, anxious,
asking what had happened to me.
I tried calling but her mobile was switched off.
I couldn't do any more that night.
Exhausted, I fell asleep
watching a documentary about the Camdes' Garden.
I woke up late and phoned Candy again
but her mobile was still turned off.
I was afraid that the worst had happened.
Not knowing what to do, I stayed in my room to see if she'd ring me there.
I zapped through the Chinese channels,
the only ones available.
I didn't understand a word of this Cantonese opera.
I imagined the story of a mysterious secret book,
coveted by desperate women and dangerous bandits,
like the pirate stories in the China Seas of my youth.
I sent Candy a text asking her to ring me urgently
and went out for lunch.
The Portuguese man arrived yesterday. Is the meeting in the temple?
The meeting's still in the agreed place. But you have to be careful.
That's not a problem, he's being watched.
Madame Lobo says for the moment there's no danger.
The Portuguese man is a lamb amongst wolves.
There is no point in killing the lamb.
Understood, I'll pass on the information.
I went down Palmeira' Street
looking for a restaurant my parents took me to.
I don't remember there being so many stray dogs in Macao.
Lucky, my first dog, suffered a worse fate;
he ended up being eaten by the Chinese.
Fortunately, those restaurants no longer exist.
Sadly, the roving vendors from whom I bought candy by my old school gates
had been banned.
Joy Alley
Santa Rosa de Lima School is different.
My classroom has been turned into a warehouse for rubbish
and the boys are gone.
I had a strange foreboding, something I couldn't explain.
As if the shadow of death was hovering over Macao.
I passed by a Portuguese restaurant.
I didn't travel thousands of miles for a Portuguese egg tart.
While eating a noodle soup I rang Candy again,
but the phone was still switched off.
I decided to go to the casino Jai Alai where she now worked.
The former Basque pelota.
Did everything go well?
Yes, nothing I couldn't fix.
We met up at the Loan Tower, but he didn't want to return the cage.
I killed him and it's over.
You did well, maybe now they'll calm down.
What about the transvestite and the Portuguese man?
As far as the Portuguese man goes, Madame Lobo says to wait.
He knows nothing.
The transvestite's being dealt with.
So, all is as planned. The great ritual of the chosen ones has begun.
When the cage is ready you will be contacted.
I walked along by the old wall on the Praia Grande Avenue
which used to separate Macao from the sea.
The old trees sculpted by the wind
are no longer battered by waves on typhoon days;
they stand solitary, wedged between the traffic,
waiting for people to come back and stroll in their shade.
And in the distance, Macao Tower, which dominates the land stolen from the sea,
seemed to be observing me, with all its monumental arrogance,
as if to prove that times have changed.
No-one wanted to talk about Candy.
Mistrustful, everyone seemed to ignore me.
I was on the verge of giving up
when one of the hotel staff said, fearfully,
she hadn't come to work for two nights.
She suggested I go to the Military Club where Candy usually had dinner.
Upon leaving, I stared at the empty stage.
I had some time to kill until dinner time
and decided to go to the house where I had lived in the 70s.
The Moorish Barracks are now a tourist attraction
in the Historic Centre of Macao,
classified a World Heritage Site by UNESCO in 2005.
Do you remember the story you told me?
Wasn't this the ledge running above the prison terrace you used to cross?
You'd jump onto the terrace of the arsenal
and hide the toys of your secret group
by the window that overlooked the cell block corridor.
- What was your secret group called? - It was the Fire Dragon.
Do you think the toys are still there?
That window no longer exists.
The people united shall never be defeated
Honor the motherland because the motherland beholds you
Department of Financial Administration
Head of supply section
It seemed as if all the dogs in Macao were following me.
I received a text:
It was signed:
I watched the sunset over the Peoples' Republic of China
and understood that despite the ceaseless construction
and the building sites that almost doubled its area,
Macao continues to be the same:
a small territory where everyone always knows everything about everything.
Honor the motherland because the motherland beholds you
Siege gate's border post
Despite apparent normality, it continues
to be a small besieged and guarded peninsula.
However, it was here that I wanted to be,
and no anonymous threat
was going to make me leave.
Candy never showed up at the Military Club,
which was empty,
populated by ghosts from the past.
I rang back
but her mobile was still switched off.
I sent her another text.
Not knowing what to do, I wandered,
lost in the casinos' neons.
Candy didn't show up for work that night either.
I went for dinner.
There was nothing more I could do.
If Candy didn't contact me tonight,
the next day 1 would go to the police.
Can someone enjoy such great food among so many people and feel so alone?
For I did.
- Candy, are you all right? - Yes... I don't know.
I sent you so many messages...
I saw. Baby, I'm sorry for everything. It's more complicated than I thought.
Baby, we don't have much time. They may be listening.
- Where are you? - At the Inner Harbour.
Oh good, you're nearby.
Come to my house, but you have to come now.
The address is Travessa da Saudade, number 22, 1st floor right.
You can't miss it, love, it's a modern building.
I'll come straight over.
Baby, we are all in danger. Be careful!
I thought I knew where the street was,
but I got lost.
No-one would give me directions.
Finally I found the building.
The light in Candy's apartment was on.
I rang the bell but no-one opened the door.
I rang several times.
When the door opened, I walked in.
Candy, are you there?
Open the door, it's me.
Is there anybody in?
Open up!
Could that be Candy's shoe?
The dogs kept staring at me.
The sound of Candy's mobile
echoed in the strangely silent night.
Where could she be?
Can that man have seen something?
But the man praying to the river ignored me.
My torch caught something shiny stuck on the rocks.
It was Candy's wig.
It's not worth it, he doesn't have the cage.
Let's go.
Candy was dead.
She asked me for help and I failed.
I don't know what's happening and I should go to the police
but frankly, I'm not interested.
Tomorrow I'm catching the plane to Lisbon.
My darling,
by the time you read this letter, I may be dead.
I have so many things to tell you
but I'm afraid I won't have that chance.
Macao is so small and, still, since you came
we haven't been able to meet.
I am afraid that we'll never see each other again, at least in this life.
1 would like to write about the crazy years we had in Lisbon,
about all the wonderful things that have happened to me
in this self-imposed Asian exile,
but time is running out and I will have to be brief
because I am being watched, as you may be also.
My darling,
you know what I do for a living.
I hear many things that men would like to forget they have told me.
You know how it is...
But this time the situation is serious, very serious.
For many ancestral cultures,
2012 is the year when this age will end and another will begin.
Some Buddhist prophecies say that this will be the year
when the human race becomes extinct.
I always thought Macao
was a place of myths and superstitions.
Now I know that in this City
of the Holy Name of God not everything is myth.
We are all ruled by an animal:
I am a tiger, I think you are a snake.
I don't know if you know the history of the Chinese Zodiac:
Buddha invited all the animals of creation
to a party on New Year's Eve.
The twelve that showed up
swore that each of them would walk the earth for one day and night
in turn to protect the human race.
So, thanks to the constant vigilance of the animals,
Buddha guarantees order in the Universe.
I am telling you this because the end is near.
And I, stupid as I am, got you involved in all of this.
Yes, your life too is in danger.
But don't underestimate what I am telling you.
The prophecy will be fulfilled sooner or later.
Various sects are involved, but the sect of the Zodiac,
or the Dog Men, as it is also known,
seems to have been chosen by Buddha himself, so they say.
You must think I've gone mad.
How I wish that this was just another one of my stories,
made up after too many drinks and other things, as we usually did...
But I am writing to you
because I think it's still possible to change the course of events.
A-Kan has just arrived.
I have reread what I wrote. I see I've left nearly everything unsaid.
He will see that you get this letter
if something happens to me.
Go to the Inner Harbour, hire a sampan from one of the fishermen
and look for the ancient pirates' cave on the island of Coloane.
I don't know exactly what you'll find,
but that's where everything happens.
Look for the book of the Apocalypse and the sacred cage.
You must believe me and do exactly what I tell you.
And, however absurd it all seems to you,
every time you question what you are witnessing and have doubts,
trust your first instinct.
For better or worse, this is the only way you will survive.
Baby, save yourself!
Your Candy.
At the entrance of the cave, I saw a pair of tights floating on the water.
As if Candy was showing me the way.
Or were they the tights Jane Russell had thrown overboard 60 years ago?
Candy was right about the sect of the Zodiac.
They know the secret of the metamorphosis
and, for some reason, they were turning themselves into animals.
Frightened, I tried to go back
but got lost in the dark tunnels.
I went round in circles until I found a way out
and forgot all about the book and the cage.
I arrived in the middle of the island
and discovered a Macao I never knew existed.
Room for hire
Nothing seemed to make sense.
But in life, many things don't make sense.
I came to feel the presence of death again.
I remembered Candy's words
and let myself be guided by my instincts.
I had nothing to lose.
- Yes? - I've been waiting for you to call me.
I'm getting worried.
Is there any news?
I was just going to ring you. I still haven't heard anything
and that's a bad sign.
We'd better get away.
Tell your wife to close the shop,
but be careful. Be discrete.
We'll meet at the temple.
If we want to survive the only thing left to do is pray.
Madame Lobo is nervous. Have you sent the order?
Yes, it will happen now.
That night, the city seemed to have gone mad.
Rituals that resembled a commemoration.
Or were they desperate prayers to avoid a fate that everyone feared?
Please don't kill me!
Have mercy!
Remember Candy's words:
Baby, save yourself!
And then I understood why I had returned to Macao 30 years later.
It was not difficult to buy a gun
and find happiness.
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