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双字幕：鱼子酱 后期：鱼子酱
我要一个模范父亲 I need a father who's a role model.
不是一个看到漂亮美眉 Not some horny geek-boy who's gonna spray his shorts
就流口水的色鬼老爸 whenever I bring a girlfriend home from school.
他逊毙了 What a lame-o.
应该有人来结束他可悲的生命 Someone really should just put him out of his misery.
要我干掉他吗? Want me to kill him for you?
好 你肯吗? Yeah. Would you?
美 国 丽 人
我叫赖斯特·班宁 My name is Lester Burnham.
这是我的家乡 This is my neighborhood.
这是我的街道 This is my street.
这是我的一生 This is my life.
我今年42岁 一年之内我就会死 I'm 42 years old. In less than a year...I'll be dead.
当然 现在我还不知道 Of course, I don't know that yet.
不过老实说 我的心早就死了 And in a way, I'm dead already.
看看我 Look at me.
躲在浴室打手枪 Jerking off in the shower.
这是我每天唯一的高潮 This will be the high point of my day.
之后就每况愈下 It's all downhill from here.
我老婆 卡洛琳 That's my wife, Carolyn.
你看她的剪刀跟鞋子 颜色搭配得多好 See the way the handle on those pruning shears matches her gardening clogs?
这不是巧合 That's not an accident.
小不点 别乱叫 Hush, Bitsy!
你是怎么了? Hush! What is wrong with you?
我们的邻居 吉姆 That's our next door neighbor, Jim.
他的爱人...也叫吉姆 And that's his lover... Jim.
你把它宠坏了... You spoil her. Bitsy...
-我? -别乱叫 进来 - Me? - ...no bark! Come inside now!
-来 -早安 吉姆 - Come on. - Good morning, Jim!
早 卡洛琳 Morning, Carolyn.
你的领带好帅 颜色很棒 I love your tie. That color!
你的玫瑰好漂亮 怎么会开得这么好? I just love your roses. How do you get them to flourish like this?
我跟你说 蛋壳和肥料双管齐下 Well, I'll tell you: eggshells and Miracle-Gro.
我没听过这一招 I've never heard of that.Man...
我看到她就累 ...I get exhausted just watching her.
她以前不是这样 她曾经快乐过 She wasn't always like this. She used to be happy.
我们曾经快乐过 We used to be happy.
我女儿 小珍 My daughter, Jane.
我们的独女 Only child.
"隆胸"
小珍是典型的新新人类 Janie's a pretty typical teenager:
愤世嫉俗 徬徨迷惑 angry, insecure, confused.
我很想告诉她明天会更好 I wish I could tell her that's all going to pass
可是我不想说谎 but I don't want to lie to her.
小珍 你想扮成丑小鸭吗? Jane, honey, are you trying to look unattractive?
对 Yes.
恭喜哦 你扮得很像 Congratulations, you've succeeded admirably.
老公 你能再慢一点吗? Lester, could you make me a little later?
因为我可以迟到久一点喔 I'm not quite late enough.
老爸 你真行 Nice going, Dad.
我的妻女都觉得我很失败 Both my wife and daughter think I'm this gigantic loser.
她们没错 And they're right.
我失去了什么 I have lost something.
我不知道是什么 I'm not exactly sure what it is,
过去我从未感到这么... but I know I didn't always feel this...
死气沉沉 sedated.
不过你知道吗? But you know what?
想要重振雄风永远不嫌晚 It's never too late to get it back.
这是"媒体月刊"的赖斯特 Hello. This is Lester Burnham from Media Monthly magazine.
请找谭先生 I'm calling for Mr. Tamblin, please.
截稿日期已经到了 Well, we're all under a deadline here.
贵公司的新产品 There's some information about your product launch
还缺一些资料 that isn't even covered in your press release and...
对...我想问一下 Yeah, OK. Can I ask you a question?
到底有没有谭先生这个人? Who is Tamblin? Does he exist?
因为他从来不上班 'Cause he doesn't ever seem to come in.
好吧 我留下电话号码 Yeah, OK. I'll leave my number.
是555-0199 It's 555-01 99.
赖斯特·班宁 Lester Burnham.
谢谢 Thank you.
赖斯 Hey, Les.
借用你一分钟 You got a minute?
为了你 布莱德 五分钟都行 For you, Brad, I got five.
你知道公司必须裁减支出 So I'm sure you can understand our need to cut corners around here.
当然了 Sure.
景气不好 你得另找财路 Times are tight. You got to free up some cash.
想赚钱就得先花钱 You got to spend money to make money, right?
没错 Exactly.
就像主编 Like the time when Mr. Flournoy
刷公司的信用卡召妓 used the company MasterCard to pay for that hooker,
结果被她盗用花了一大笔钱 then she used the card and stayed at the St. Regis for three months...
-那只是个谣言 -那是五万元 - That's unsubstantiated gossip! - That's $50,000!
他乱花公司的钱 That's someone's salary who's gonna get fired
现在却要炒员工鱿鱼 because Craig has to pay women to fuck him!
老天 冷静点 Jesus! Calm down.
还没有人被炒鱿鱼 Nobody's getting fired yet.
我只是请大家写份报告 That's why we're having everyone write out a job description
谈谈你们对公司有何贡献 mapping out in detail how they contribute.
这样上头才知道谁可以用 That way management can assess who's valuable...
谁可以卷铺盖走路 And who's expendable.
我只是公事公办 It's just business.
我在公司待了十四年 你才来了一个月 I've been writing for this magazine for 14 years. You've been here a month?
我可是好人耶 I'm one of the good guys, Les.
我在替你着想 I'm trying to level with you.
这是你保住饭碗的机会 This is your one chance to save your job.
别想了 快写吧 There's no decision. Just write the damn thing.
你不觉得这很独裁吗? You don't think it's weird and kind of fascist?
也许吧 不过你不能失业 Possibly, but you don't want to be unemployed.
所以我就得跟魔鬼交易吗? Let's sell our souls and work for Satan because it's more convenient.
你也未免太夸张了一点 Could you be a little bit more dramatic, please?
终于来了新邻居 So we finally got new neighbors.
要是罗家把房子交给我处理 lf the Lomans had let me represent them instead of the Real Estate King
就不会等了半年才脱手 that house would never have sat on the market for six months.
谁叫你砍掉他们的树 They were still mad at you for cutting down their sycamore.
他们的树? Their sycamore? Come on!
拜托 树根有一大半长在我们家 A substantial portion of the root structure was on our property.
怎么会是他们的树? How can you call it their sycamore?
是我的树我才会把它砍掉 I wouldn't have the heart to cut down something if it wasn't partially mine.
我们一定要听这种电梯音乐吗? Mom, do we always have to listen to this elevator music?
不一定 No. No, we don't.
只要你煮一顿美味可口的晚餐 As soon as you've prepared a nutritious, yet savory, meal
你想听什么都行 that I'm about to eat you can listen to whatever you like.
小珍 学校好吗? So, Janie, how was school?
还好 It was OK.
只是还好? Just OK?
不是 学校棒呆了 No, Dad. It was spectacular.
你想知道我的工作怎样吗? Well, you want to know how things went at myjob today?
公司请来一个效率专家 They've hired this efficiency expert.
名字叫布莱德 有够呛 This really friendly guy named Brad. How perfect is that?
他其实是负责开除员工的 He's there to make it seem like they're justified in firing somebody
只是他们不敢明讲 because they couldn't just come right out and say that.
他们太阴险了 That would just be too honest.
所以我们就得... 你根本就不在乎 是吗? So they've asked us. You couldn't possibly care less, could you?
你想怎样? Well, what do you expect?
不可能只因为你今天过得很糟 You can't all of a sudden be my best friend
我们的感情就突然变好 just because you had a bad day.
拜托 你好久没跟我聊天了 I mean, hello! You've barely even spoken to me for months.
难道你是模范母亲吗? 你把她当成员工 What? You're Mother of the Year? You treat her like an employee.
什么? What?
你说什么? What?!
我要去吃冰淇淋 I'm going to get some ice cream.
小珍 很抱歉 Janie... I'm sorry
我没有...多陪陪你 I haven't been more... available. I'm just... I...
你不必等我来找你呀 You know, you don't always have to wait for me to come to you.
棒呆了 原来是我的错 Great. So now it's my fault?
这不是谁的错 I didn't say that. It's nobody's fault.
到底是怎么回事? Janie, what happened?
从前我们无话不谈 We used to be pals.
房屋中介卡洛琳·班宁
今天开放参观
中介王巴迪·坎恩
今天我会卖掉这栋房子 I will sell this house today.
我会卖掉这栋房子... I will sell this house today.
今天我会卖掉这栋房子 I will sell this house today.
欢迎光临 我是卡洛琳·班宁 Welcome. I'm Carolyn Burnham.
这间客厅很气派 This living room is very dramatic.
壁炉是用上好石材砌成的 Wait till you see the native stone fireplace!
粉刷一下保证焕然一新 A simple cream could really lighten things up.
装个天窗更棒 You could even put in a skylight.
我们去看看厨房 Well, why don't we go into the kitchen?
简直就是美食家乐园 It's a dream come true for any cook.
每个人都能当食神 Just filled with positive energy.
电吊扇可以省下一大笔电费 You'll be surprised how much a ceiling fan can cut down on your energy costs.
后院可以举行很棒的烤肉大会 You know, you could have some really fun backyard get-togethers out here.
广告说泳池很像蓝色珊瑚礁 这一点也不像 The ad said this pool was "lagoon-like." Nothing "lagoon-like" about it.
只有一大堆蚊子 连花草都没有 Except for maybe the bugs! There aren't even any plants out here!
这些呢? 这不是花草吗? What do you call this? ls this not this a plant?
你们要花草我就找园丁来 一次搞定 If you have a problem with the plants, I can call my landscape architect.
珊瑚礁应该有热带风味 Solved! I think lagoon, I think waterfall.
这只是个水泥坑 I think tropical. This is a cement hole.
车库里有火把 I have some tiki torches in the garage.
别哭了! 别哭 爱哭鬼 Shut up! Stop it! You weak. You baby! Shut up!
别哭了! 别哭... Shut up! Shut up!
你在找谁? Who are you looking for?
我爸妈说要来 My parents are coming tonight.
他们想要开始多关心我 They're trying to, you know, take an active interest in me.
恶心 我最恨我老妈这样 Gross. I hate it when my mom does that.
真是无聊透顶 他们关心自己就好了 They're such assholes. Why can't theyjust have their own lives?
她有说要我们去看她吗? What makes you so sure she wants us to be there? Did she ask?
没有 不过这对她很重要 Of course not. She doesn't want us to know how important this is to her.
她练习了好几个礼拜 But she's been practicing her steps for weeks.
她一定会恨我们 I'll bet money she'll resent it.
我也错过第四台播的007 And I'm missing the James Bond marathon on TNT.
老公 这很重要耶 Lester! This is important!
我觉得你跟小珍渐渐疏远了 I'm sensing a real distance growing between you and Jane.
疏远? 她讨厌我 Growing? She hates me.
她只是个性倔强 She's just willful.
她也讨厌你 She hates you, too.
借光 借光 I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
不好意思 对不起 Pardon me. Excuse me.
今晚半场的精采表演 Now, for your halftime entertainment,
声名远播的洛威高中啦啦队 Rockwell High's award-winning Dancing Spartanettes!
看完了就能走吧? We can leave right after this, right?
雪特! 他们没走 Shit! They're still here.
-小珍 -我很喜欢你的表演 - Janie! - Hey, I really enjoyed that!
恭喜 你很棒 Congratulations! You were great!
我又没赢什么 I didn't win anything.
我是小珍的爸爸赖斯特 Hi, I'm Lester, Janie's dad.
哦 你好 Oh, hi.
我的死党安琪拉·海瑟 This is my friend, Angela Hayes.
很好 幸会了 OK. Good to meet you.
你的表演也很棒 非常... You were also good tonight. Very...
准确无误 ...precise.
谢了 Thanks.
幸会了 安琪拉! 小珍 Nice to meet you, Angela. Honey!
我以你为荣 I am so proud of you!
我有仔细看 你没有跳错 You know, I watched you very closely. You didn't screw up once!
我们得走了 OK. We have to go.
你们要去哪儿? So what are you girls doing now?
爸 Dad!
我们要去吃披萨 We're going out for pizza.
我有车 要我载一程吗? Really? We can give you a ride. I have a car. Want to come with us?
谢了 我也有车 Thanks, but I have a car.
你有车 太好了 You have a car. Well, that's great. That's great.
最近小珍也想买车 对吧 小珍? 'Cause Janie's thinking about getting a car soon, aren't you?
妈在等你 Dad! Mom's waiting for you.
很高兴认识你 It was very nice meeting you, Angela.
只要是小珍的朋友 Any friend of Janie's is...
就是我的朋友 ...a friend of mine.
回头见 Well...I'll be seeing you around, then.
他实在是有够逊了 Could he be any more... pathetic?
他很可爱呀 I think he's sweet.
他跟你妈一定很久没搞过了 And I think he and your mother have not had sex in a long time.
很奇怪 It's the weirdest thing.
我好像昏睡了二十年 I feel like I've been in a coma for about 20 years
现在终于苏醒 and I'm just now waking up.
棒呆了 Spectacular.
抱歉我老爸刚才那么猪哥 I'm so sorry my dad was weird tonight.
没关系 That's OK.
男人都会对我流口水 I'm used to guys drooling over me.
我十二岁起就这样 It started when I was about 12.
我跟爸妈上馆子 I'd go to dinner with my parents.
星期四都到红龙虾餐馆 Every Thursday night, Red Lobster.
每个男人都盯着我看 And every guy there would stare at me when I walked in.
他们只有一个念头 And I knew what they were thinking.
就像男同学打手枪都在想我 Just like I knew guys at school thought about me when theyjerked off.
好恶心 Vomit.
不会 我喜欢 现在也是 No, I liked it. And I still like it.
当男人看到我就想跟我上床 If people I don't even know look at me and want to fuck me
这代表我能当模特儿 it means I really have a shot at being a model,
这样很棒 which is great.
因为当平凡人是最惨的 Because there's nothing worse in life than being ordinary.
你一定能成功 I really think it'll happen for you.
我知道 I know.
因为一个人命中注定的事 一定会发生 Because everything that was meant to happen, does... eventually.
讨厌 Asshole.
安琪拉·海瑟
喂 Hello?
喂? Hello?
-喂? -你打给我干嘛? - Hello? - Why'd you call me?
没有啊 I didn't.
我一接电话就被挂断 My phone rang and I answered, and somebody hung up.
按自动回电后你就接了 I star-69ed, and I called you back.
我刚才在洗澡 Well, I was in the shower.
好恶心 Oh, gross!
芮奇 来吃早饭 Ricky? Breakfast!
马上来 Be right there.
-妈? -嗨 - Mom? - Hello.
我不吃培根 记得吗? I don't eat bacon, remember?
对不起 我忘了 I'm sorry. I must've forgotten.
爸 有什么新闻? What's new in the world, Dad?
这国家就快完蛋了 This country is going straight to hell.
-你在等人吗? -没有 - Are you expecting anyone? - No.
没有啊 No.
-嗨 -欢迎搬来这个社区 - Hi. - Welcome to the neighborhood.
咱们后院种的 Just something from our garden.
除了意大利面是美食店买的 Except the pasta. We got that at Fallaci's.
新鲜得不得了 丢进滚水一烫就熟 It's unbelievably fresh. Drop it in the water and it's done.
吉姆欧麦尔 Jim Olmeyer.
你的邻居 欢迎你们 Two doors down. Welcome to the neighborhood.
海军陆战队法兰克费兹中校 Colonel Frank Fitts, US Marine Corps.
幸会 他是我伙伴 Nice to meet you. This is my partner.
吉姆巴克莱 小名JB Jim Berkley, but people call me J.B.
废话少说 Let's cut to the chase, OK?
你们想推销什么? What are you guys selling?
没有 我们只是打声招呼 Nothing. We just wanted to say hi to our new neighbors.
才怪 你们是伙伴 You said you're partners,
你们是做什么的? so what's your business?
嗯... Well...
他是税务律师 He is a tax attorney.
他是麻醉师 And he's an anesthesiologist.
这些臭同志老爱骚扰别人 How come these faggots always have to rub it in your face?
他们怎么会这么无耻? How can they be so shameless?
重点是他们不觉得这很无耻 That's the whole thing, Dad. They don't feel that's anything to be ashamed of.
无耻透顶 Well, it is.
你说得对 Yeah, you're right.
别把我当你妈一样哄 Don't placate me like I'm your mother, boy.
请恕我有话直说 Forgive me, sir, for speaking so bluntly:
那些臭同志真是令我作呕 Those fags make me want to puke my fucking guts out.
我有同感 儿子 Well, me too, Son.
我有同感 Yeah, me too.
是真的 他就把那话儿掏出来 I'm serious. He just pulled down his pants and yanked it out.
然后说 来见我小弟弟 You know, like, "Say hello to Mr. Happy."
好恶心 Gross.
才不会 挺酷的 It wasn't gross. It was kind of cool.
你跟他做了吗? So did you do it with him?
当然了 Of course I did.
他是有名的摄影师 He is a really well-known photographer.
经常替超级名模拍照 He shoots for Elle on, like, a regular basis.
拒绝他就未免太猪头了 It would've been so majorly stupid of me to turn him down.
你就像个妓女 You are a total prostitute.
这才是现实社会 Hey. That's how things really are.
你只是个被宠坏的娇娇女 You just don't know because you're this pampered little suburban chick.
你也是 So are you.
你上过一次杂志 而且很肥 You've only been in Seventeen once, and you looked fat!
别以为自己是超级名模 So stop acting like you're goddamned Christy Turlington!
婊子 Cunt!
我最恨别人嫉妒我就乱骂人 I am so sick of people taking their insecurities out on me.
我的天 Oh, my God!
他是昨晚偷拍我的变态 That's the pervert who filmed me last night.
他? Him?
不可能 他是个疯子 Jane, no way, he's a total lunatic.
-你认识他? -嗯 - You know him? - Yeah.
是啊 国三我跟他同校 We were on the same lunch shift when I was in ninth grade
他老是乱说一些奇怪的话 and he would always say the most random, weird things.
有一天他突然消失不见 And then one day, he was just, like, gone.
然后... And then,
康妮说他被父母关进疯人院 Connie Cardullo told me that his parents had to put him in a mental institution.
他做了什么? Why? What did he do?
什么意思? What do you mean?
乱说话又不会被关进疯人院 Well, they can't put you away just for saying weird things.
你这个小骚包 You total slut!
-你在暗恋他 -什么? 拜托 - You've got a crush on him! - What? Please!
你爱上他才替他说话 你想要生他的小孩 You're defending him. You love him. You want to have 1 0,000 of his babies.
-闭嘴 -嗨 - Shut up! - Hi.
我叫芮奇 刚搬到你家隔壁 My name's Ricky. I just moved next door to you.
我知道 I know.
昨晚你很变态 一直偷拍我 I remember this really creepy incident where you were filming me last night.
我不想吓你 只是你很有意思 I didn't mean to scare you. I just think you're interesting.
谢了 Thanks,
不过我不想让变态狂迷上我 but I don't need some psycho obsessing about me right now.
我不是迷上你 I'm not obsessing.
只是对你很好奇 I'm just curious.
大怪胎 What a freak!
他活像个摩门教徒 And why does he dress like a Bible salesman?
他好有自信心 He's, like, so confident.
不可思议 That can't be real.
我不敢相信 I don't believe him.
他连看都没看我一眼 I mean, he didn't even look at me once.
你为什么入伍? How'd you get in the Army?
教官 我有三个理由 Look, Sergeant, I got three reasons for being in the Army.
第一 我忠贞 第二 我爱国 First, I'm patriotic. Second, I love my country.
第三 我收到征召令 And third, they nailed me.
解散后马上向我报到 You two boys report to me immediately after this formation.
把他们带走 Take them away, Sarge!
嘿 Hey.
一 二 三 四 One, two, three, four.
这是怎么回事? What's going on here?
趴低点 魔鬼教官来了 Bend all the way down. Here comes the bull of the woods.
你说什么? I'm sorry, what?
没有人说话 Mom, nobody said anything.
对不起 Oh. I'm sorry.
大家都携伴参加 要不然会惹人闲话 Everyone's with their spouse. How'd it look if I showed up with no one?
-你一定会跑去跟别人聊天... -听我说 - You end up ignoring me and talking... - Now listen to me.
这是重要的应酬 This is an important business function.
卖房子就像是贩卖形象 As you know, my business is selling an image
我必须维持好形象 and part of myjob is to live that image...
老婆 帮帮忙 Honey, do me a favor.
废话少说 别跟我来这一套 好吧 Just say whatever you want to say and spare me the propaganda.
嗨 雪莉 All right. Hi, Shirley!
帮个忙 装开心点 Listen, just do me a favor. Act happy tonight.
我很开心呀 I am happy, honey.
才怪 No, you're not.
是巴迪 Oh! That's Buddy!
巴迪 Buddy.
巴迪... Buddy!
-嗨 -很高兴再见到你 - Hi. - Hi! Good to see you again.
我也是 卡瑟琳 It's so good to see you, too, Catherine.
-卡洛琳 -卡洛琳 没错 你好吗? - Carolyn. - Carolyn, of course. How are you?
很好 谢谢 Very well, thank you.
-你好 克莉丝 -你好 - Hello, Christy. - Hello.
我老公 赖斯特 My husband, Lester.
幸会 It's a pleasure.
去年我们在耶诞节晚会见过 We've met before, actually. This thing last year.Christmas at the Sheraton.
是啊 Oh, yeah.
没关系 连我也不会记得我 It's OK. I wouldn't remember me, either.
老公 别乱讲话 Honey, don't be weird!
-好吧 我不乱讲话 -好 - All right, honey. I won't be weird. - OK.
-你要我怎样我就怎样 -嗯 好... - I'll be whatever you want me to be. - Well, OK...
我们的关系很好 We have a very healthy relationship.
是啊 I see.
你们聊 我去喝酒 Well, I don't know about you guys, but I need a drink.
多倒点 老兄 Put a little more in there, cowboy.
对不起 Excuse me.
你住在罗宾汉街的红门房子? Don't you live on Robin Hood Trail? The house with the red door?
对 Yeah.
我是芮奇 刚搬到你家隔壁 I'm Ricky Fitts. I just moved in the house next to you.
嗨 我是赖斯特·班宁 Hi, Ricky Fitts. I'm Lester Burnham.
你好 班先生 Hi, Mr. Burnham.
你哈不哈草? Do you party?
什么? Excuse me?
你想爽一下吗? Do you get high?
我是有点醉才敢这么说 I probably wouldn't even tell you this if I weren't a little tipsy
我好崇拜你 but... I'm in complete awe of you.
你的房屋中介公司规模庞大 I mean, your firm is hands down the Rolls Royce of local real estate firms
你个人的业绩更是... and your personal sales record is...
让我自叹不如 It's very intimidating.
我很想好好研究你的大脑 You know, I'd love to sit down with you and just pick your brain.
如果你肯的话 If you'd ever be willing.
老实说 虽然我们算同行 You know? I suppose, technically, I'm the competition
我根本就没资格和你平起平坐 but, I mean, I don't flatter myself that I'm even in the same league as you.
是真的 I don't.
我很乐意 I'd love to.
-真的? -当然了 - Really? - Absolutely.
打给我秘书安排午餐 Call my secretary. Have her schedule a lunch.
好吧 谢谢你 I'll do that. Thank you.
有一部恐怖片拍一具无头尸 Did you see that movie where the body is walking around
手里的人头去亲一个美女 carrying its own head and then the head goes down on that babe?
"活死人" Re-Animator.
我不是付你钱跑到外面哈草 Look, I'm not paying you to do whatever it is you're doing out here.
好 那就别付我钱 Fine. So don't pay me.
-你说什么? -我不干了 - Excuse me? - I quit.
你不必付我钱 So you don't have to pay me.
别烦我 Now leave me alone.
臭小子 Asshole.
你是我的偶像 I think you just became my personal hero.
你说不干就不干 不怕吗? Doesn't that make you nervous, just quitting yourjob like that?
你今年才...十六岁? Well, I guess when you're all of, what, 16...
十八岁 Eighteen.
这份工作只是幌子 I just do these gigs as a cover.
我有别的收入 I have other sources of income.
我为了应付老爸 But my dad interferes less in my life
就假装是有工作的有为青年 when I pretend to be an upstanding young citizen with a respectable job.
赖斯特 Lester?!
你在干嘛? What are you doing?
老婆 这是...芮奇 Honey, this... Ricky Fitts.
这是芮奇 This is Ricky Fitts.
我是芮奇 刚搬到你家隔壁 I'm Ricky Fitts. I just moved into the house next to you.
我跟你女儿同校 I go to school with your daughter.
-小珍? -对 - With Jane? - Yeah.
-小珍 -真的吗? - Jane. - Really?
我要走了 门口见 Hi. I'm ready to go. I'll meet you out front.
我死定了 I'm in trouble!
幸会了 谢谢你的烟 Nice meeting you, Ricky Fitts. Thanks for the... thing.
不客气 Anytime. Lester!
还要的话尽管来找我 If you want any more, you know where I live.
讨厌 他们回家了 Shit. They're home.
快点到我房间 Quick, let's go up to my room.
我得跟你爸打声招呼 I should say hi to your dad.
不能没有礼貌 I don't want to be rude.
好正点的西装 Nice suit.
伯父 你很帅哦 You're looking good, Mr. Burnham.
上次你好像有点紧张 Last time I saw you, you looked kind of wound up.
那是沙士吗? Is that root beer?
我最爱喝沙士了 I love root beer, don't you?
-嘿 -嗨 妈 - Hey. - Hi, Mom.
记得安琪拉吗? You remember Angela?
当然了 Yes, of course.
我忘了讲 她要来过夜 可以吗? I forgot to tell you, she's gonna spend the night. ls that OK?
我老爸糗毙了 Sorry about my dad.
不会 他很好玩 Don't be. I think it's funny.
对你来说他只想跟你上床 Yeah, to you, he's just another guy who wants to jump your bones.
对我来说 But to me,
他真的很丢脸 he's just... too embarrassing to live.
你老妈才丢脸 她好假哦 Well, your mom's the one who's embarrassing. What a phony.
你老爸倒是很可爱 But your dad's actually kind of cute.
闭嘴 Shut up.
是真的 他练一下身体会很性感 He is. If he just worked out a little, he'd be hot.
闭嘴 Shut up!Come on!
难道你没偷看他洗澡吗? Like you've never sneaked a peek at him in his underwear?
他的小弟弟一定很大 I bet he's got a big dick.
你真是有够恶心 You are so grossing me out right now!
要是他是肌肉男我就会搞他 If he built up his chest and arms, I would totally fuck him!
我还会舔你老爸的小弟弟 I would! I would suck on your dad's big, fat dick
然后把他搞到爽歪歪 and then I'd fuck him until his eyes rolled back in his head!
什么声音? Jane! What's that noise?
-我听到什么 -嗯 - I swear I heard something. - Yeah.
那是你淫声浪语的声音 That was the sound of you being a huge, disgusting pig.
我是说真的 No, I'm serious.
你看 See?
我的天 Oh, my God, Jane.
是什么? What is it?
隔壁的小变态 It's that psycho next door.
也许他迷上了你 Jane, what if he worships you?
也许他用死人骷髅什么的 What if he's got, like, a shrine
对着你的照片烧香膜拜 with pictures of you surrounded by dead people's heads and stuff?
他一定在拍我们 Shit. I bet he's filming us right now.
真的吗? Really?
欢迎观赏"变态一箩筐" Welcome to America's Weirdest Home Videos.
芮奇 Ricky?
我来了 Coming, Dad.
我不喜欢你锁住房门 You know I don't like locked doors in my house, boy.
对不起 我不是故意的 I'm sorry. I must've locked it by accident.
有什么事? So, what's up?
我要你的尿液样本 I need a urine sample.
又过了半年 Wow. It's been six months already.
我刚小便 明天再给你 Can I give it to you in the morning? I just took a whiz.
好吧 Yeah, I suppose.
你知道... You know...
晚安 儿子 Well... Good night, Son.
我在等着你 I've been waiting for you.
你练过肌肉 对吧? You've been working out, haven't you?
我看得出来 I could tell.
我想要你替我洗澡 I was hoping you'd give me a bath.
我好肮脏 I'm very, very dirty.
你在干嘛? What are you doing?
没干嘛 Nothing.
你在自慰 You were masturbating.
-才没有 -你在自慰 - I was not. - Yes, you were.
我是在自慰 把我拉去枪毙吧 All right, so shoot me! I was whacking off.
没错 我在打手枪 That's right, I was choking the bishop. Chafing the carrot.
跟我的小弟弟玩 You know, saying hi to my monster.
太恶心了 That's disgusting!
对不起哦 至少我还有一点性趣 Excuse me, but some of us still have blood pumping through our veins!
我也有 So do I!
是吗? Really?
只有我肯采取行动 I'm the only one who seems to be doing anything about it!
我不想这样下去 Lester, I refuse to live like this.
我们根本不像夫妻 This is not a marriage!
我们早就没有夫妻之实了 This hasn't been a marriage for years.
我不抱怨你就没意见 But you were happy as long as I kept my mouth shut.
可是我变了 Guess what? I've changed.
现在我想打手枪就打 And the new me whacks off when he feels horny,
因为你一点也帮不上忙 'cause you're obviously not gonna help me out in that department.
你以为只有你会性饥渴吗? I see. You think you're the only one who's sexually frustrated.
是吗? 那就上呀 宝贝 I'm not? Well, then come on, baby, I'm ready!
别把我惹毛了 Don't you mess with me, mister.
小心我跟你离婚把你整惨 I will divorce you so fast it'll make your head spin!
凭什么? On what grounds?
我不酗酒 不乱搞外遇 I'm not a drunk. I don't fuck other women.
从来没有动手打过你 I don't mistreat you. I've never hit you.
自从你摆明把我当成废物 I don't even try to touch you since you made it abundantly clear
我连碰都没碰过你 just how unnecessary you consider me to be!
不过我却帮你考到中介执照 But I did support you when you got your license.
我应该能分你一半的财产 And some people might think that entitles me to half of what's yours.
待会你上床记得关灯 So turn out the light when you come back to bed, OK?
能够尽情发泄的感觉很棒 It's a great thing when you realize you still have the ability to surprise yourself.
也许我的能力不限于此 Makes you wonder what else you can do that you've forgotten about.
大伙好 Hey, guys!
你也跑步吗? Lester, I didn't know you ran.
才开始 I just started.
太好了 Good for you.
你们可以指点指点我 I figured you might be able to give me some pointers.
我得赶紧练好身材 I need to shape up. Fast.
你是想减重 Are you looking to just lose weight
还是增强体力跟耐力 or do you want to have increased strength and flexibility as well?
我只想有好身材 I want to look good naked.
搞什么? What is this?
同性恋大游行吗? Fucking gay pride parade?
芮奇 Hey, Ricky.
我累得半死 他们却轻松自在 My life is passing before my eyes and those two have barely broken a sweat.
抱歉 你好 我住隔壁 我们没见过 Sorry, hi. Lester Burnham. I live next door. We haven't met.
海军陆战队法兰克费兹中校 Colonel Frank Fitts, US Marine Corps.
哦 嗯... Oh, well...
欢迎搬来这里 Welcome to the neighborhood, sir.
上次我们谈到的那部电影 Ricky... I was thinking about... the movie we talked about.
-"活死人" -没错 - Re-Animator. - Yeah.
你想借来看 在我房间 You want to borrow it? It's up in my room.
-好 -来吧 - OK. - Come on.
-帮我拿一下 -好 - Can you hold this for a sec? - Sure.
有人在我老爸不会闯进来 I don't think my dad would come in while someone else is here,
不过谁晓得 but you never know.
-这是什么? -尿液 - What is this? -Urine.
我每半年得验尿 确定没有吸毒 I have to take a drug test every six months just to make sure I'm clean.
别开玩笑 你昨晚才哈草 Are you kidding? You just smoked with me last night.
这不是我的 It's not mine.
我有个客户是小儿科护士 One of my clients is a nurse in a pediatrician's office.
我算她便宜 她给我干净尿液 I cut her a deal, she keeps me in clean piss.
你喜欢平克佛洛伊德乐团? You like Pink Floyd?
我喜欢很多种音乐 I like a lot of music.
我有好久没听这张唱片 Man, I haven't listened to this album in years.
你要多少? How much do you want?
不晓得 我好久没买了 I don't know. It's been a while.
一盎斯多少? How much is an ounce?
这是好货 三百元 This is totally decent, and it's 300.
这是上等货 This shit is top-of-the-line.
G13 政府研发的品种 It's called G-1 3. It's genetically engineered by the US government.
吸了很爽 不过很温和 不会有副作用 It's extremely potent, but a completely mellow high. No paranoia.
昨晚就是哈这玩意? Is that what we smoked last night?
我只哈这一种草 This is all I ever smoke.
多少? How much?
两千 Two grand.
乖乖 Jesus!
时代真的是变了 Things have changed since 1 973.
不必付现 你很可靠 You don't have to pay now. I know you're good for it.
谢了 Thanks.
我的名片有呼叫机号码 There's a card in there with my beeper number.
随时呼叫我都行 Beep me any time, day or night.
我只收现金 And I only accept cash.
怪不得你买得起这些器材 Now I know how you can afford all this equipment.
当年我为了买匣式录音机 打了一暑假的工 When I was your age, I flipped burgers all summer just to buy an 8-track.
逊毙了 That sucks.
不 其实很棒 No. Actually, it was great.
当年我成天狂欢作乐 All I did was party and get laid.
有挥霍不完的青春 had my whole life ahead of me.
我爸以为这是打工赚来的 My dad thinks I pay for all this with catering jobs.
自欺欺人有时候很有用 Never underestimate the power of denial.
你这是在干什么? What the hell do you think you're doing?
母老虎发威了 Mom's mad.
我在举重 Bench presses.
我先练胸肌然后再练背肌 I'm going to whale on my pecs, and then I'm going to do my back.
你在哈草 那敢情好 see you're smoking pot now. I'm so glad.
吸食非法的违禁药物 think using illegal psychotropic substances
真是给咱们女儿的好模范 is a very positive example to set for our daughter.
你这拜金女郎凭什么教训我 You're one to talk, you bloodless, money-grubbing freak.
你怎么讲话这么毒? Lester, you have such hostility in you!
拜托 让我健身好吗? Do you mind? I'm trying to work out here.
除非你想帮我 Unless you want to spot me.
你一定会得到报应的 Lester, you will not get away with this! You can be sure of that!
话...别...说得...太早 That's... what...you... think.
"我在公司只能偷骂混帐的上司" "Myjob consists of basically masking my contempt for the assholes in charge
"每天至少有一次 我会跑到男厕打手枪" and, at least once a day, retiring to the men's room so I can jerk off
"然后幻想我的人生不是地狱" while I fantasize about a life that doesn't so closely resemble hell."
我看你是不想保住饭碗 Well, you obviously have no interest in saving yourself.
十四年来我为工作出卖灵魂 Brad, for 14 years I've been a whore for the advertising industry.
现在我只想对公司开火 The only way I could save myself now is if I start firebombing.
随便你 你今天就得卷铺盖走路 Whatever. Management wants you gone by the end of the day.
你们打算给我多少遣散费 What sort of severance package is management prepared to offer me
我知道主编 considering the information I have about our editorial director
用公司的钱召妓 buying pussy with company money?
这种事国税局一定很感兴趣 Which I think would interest the lRS,
因为牵扯到某种诈欺 since it technically constitutes fraud.
杂志的广告主和对手 I'm sure that some of our advertisers and rival publications
也一定很想知道 might like to know about it as well.
更别说他老婆 Not to mention... Craig's wife.
你想要什么? What do you want?
一年的薪水加福利 One year's salary with benefits.
不可能 That's not going to happen.
那我就顺便提出性骚扰告诉 What do you say I throw in a little sexual harassment charge to boot?
你想告谁? Against who?
告你啊 Against you.
你能证明你没有 Can you prove that you didn't offer to save myjob
逼我让你替我吹箫吗? if I let you blow me?
你是个大疯子 Man... You are one twisted fuck.
不是 我只是一个义无反顾的平凡人 Nope. I'm just an ordinary guy with nothing to lose.
嗯 Yeah!
-卡洛琳 -巴迪 - Carolyn. - Buddy.
抱歉让你等这么久 I am so sorry to have kept you waiting.
克莉丝到纽约了 Christy left for New York this morning.
家里可以说是一团乱 Let's just say things were a little hectic around the house.
她到纽约干嘛? What's she doing in New York?
她要去搬去纽约 我们离婚了 She's moving there. Yes. We are splitting up.
巴迪 很遗憾 Buddy, I'm so sorry.
是啊 Yes.
她说...我太投入工作了 According to her, I'm too focused on my career.
好像我的事业成功反倒是... As if being driven to succeed is some sort of a
我的不对 character flaw.
她倒是很会享受我赚来的钱 She certainly did take advantage of the lifestyle my success afforded her.
这样也好 It's for the best.
那天看到你们好像幸福 When I saw you two at the party the other night, you seemed perfectly happy.
听我一言 Call me crazy...
我的看法是 想要成功 ...but it is my philosophy that in order to be successful,
就得随时随地维持完美形象 one must project an image of success at all times.
你在干嘛? What are you doing?
我在拍这只死鸟 I was filming this dead bird.
为什么? Why?
因为它很美 Because it's beautiful.
你是不是忘了吃药? I think maybe you forgot your medication today, mental-boy.
你好 小珍 Hi, Jane.
我要你别再拍我 Look, I want you to stop filming me.
好 OK.
别看了 他好无聊 走吧 Well, whatever. This is boring. Let's go.
你要搭便车吗? Do you need a ride?
你疯啦? Are you crazy?
我不想被他分尸丢进垃圾桶 I don't want to end up hacked to pieces in a dumpster somewhere.
没关系 我走路 It's OK. I'll walk.
谢了 But thanks.
他不想来 走吧 See? He doesn't want to go anyway. Come on. Let's go.
来吧 Come on, Jane.
我也想走路 I think I'm gonna walk, too.
什么? What?
拜托 有一哩路耶 Jane, that's, like, almost a mile!
爽毙了 God! I love it!
你爱被中介王搞吗? You like getting nailed by the king?
爱死了 Yes, I love it!
操我吧 陛下 Fuck me, Your Majesty!
-谁是国王? -你 - Who's the king? - You are!
谁是国王? Who's the king?
美国女郎 离我远点 American woman Stay away from me
美国女郎 别来烦我 American woman Mama let me be
别跑来敲我家门 Don't come hanging around my door
我不想再见到你 I don't wanna see your face no more
笑一笑 欢迎光临 Smile, you're at Mr. Smiley's.
什么? What?
今天的特餐是培根蛋堡 Would you like to try our new bacon and egg fajita,
只要一块两毛九 just $1 .29 for a limited time only?
不了 谢谢 No, but thank you.
我要大汉堡 薯条跟橘子汽水 I'd like the Big Barn Burger, Smiley Fries, and an orange soda.
请开到窗口付帐 谢谢 Please drive up to the window. Thank you.
谢谢光临 四块九毛八 Smile, you're at Mr. Smiley's. That'll be $4.98, please.
"今日征人"
您要特制酱料吗? Would you like some Smiley Sauce?
不要 我想申请工作 No, no. Actually, I'd like to fill out an application.
经理没缺 只有服务生 There's no jobs for manager. It's just for counter.
很好 Good.
我想找不动脑筋的工作 I'm looking for the least possible amount of responsibility.
你不适合这工作 don't think you'd fit in here.
我干过速食餐饮业 have fast-food experience.
那是二十年前 Yeah, like 20 years ago!
虽然速食餐饮业日新月异 I'm sure there have been amazing technological advances in the industry,
不过应该有职前训练吧 but surely you must have some sort of training program.
别以为我一定学不会 It seems unfair to presume I won't be able to learn.
你让我好舒服 That was exactly what I needed.
可以说是"皇家的享受" The royal treatment, so to speak.
我的压力一直都太大 I was so stressed out.
你知道我都怎样吗? Know what I do when I feel like that?
怎样? What?
我去打靶 I fire a gun.
真的吗? 我都到市区的靶场 Really? Yeah, I go to this little firing range downtown
狠狠地开几枪 and I just pop off a few rounds.
我没开过枪 I've never fired a gun before.
你得试试看 没有什么比它更爽 Well, you've got to try it. Nothing makes you feel more powerful.
除了一件事 Well, almost nothing.
你喜欢新家吗? So, do you like your new house?
喜欢 I like it.
以前的屋主常常喂流浪猫 The people who used to live there fed stray cats, so they were always around,
我妈差点没抓狂 and it drove my mother nuts.
后来她砍掉他们的树 And then she cut down their tree.
那是出殡吗? Is that a funeral?
对 你有认识的人死过吗? Yeah. Have you ever known anybody who died?
没有 你呢? No. Have you?
没有 No.
不过我看过女流浪汉冻死 But I did see this homeless woman who froze to death once.
她就躺在人行道 看起来好可怜 Just lying there on the sidewalk. She looked really sad.
我把她拍下来了 I got that homeless woman on videotape.
你为什么要拍? Why would you film that?
因为很动人 Because it was amazing.
有什么动人的? What's amazing about it?
当你看到这种事 When you see something like that
就像是上帝在凝视着你 it's like God is looking right at you, just for a second.
你只要留意就能看到祂 And if you're careful, you can look right back.
你看到什么? And what do you see?
美 Beauty.
妈 我要你见一个人 Mom? I want you to meet somebody.
妈? Mom?
什么事? Yes.
我要你见一个人 这是小珍 I want you to meet somebody. This is Jane.
-嗨 -真是的 家里真是一团乱 - Hi. - Oh, my. I apologize for the way things look around here.
我老爸都一个人来这儿 This is where my dad hides out.
我猜他很喜欢枪 I take it he's got a thing for guns.
你得看这个 You got to see this one thing.
被他发现我会被打死 My dad would kill me if he knew I was in here.
你偷拿他的钥匙? Did you steal his keys?
没有 有个客户是锁匠 No. One of my clients is a locksmith.
他缺钱 所以用这个交换 He was short on cash one night, so I let him pay me in trade.
翻过来 Turn it over.
我的天 Oh, my God.
第三帝国的官方瓷盘 It's, like, official state china of the Third Reich.
有一群人专门蒐集纳粹玩意 There's a whole subculture of people who collect this Nazi shit.
我老爸只有这盘子 But my dad just has this one thing.
怎么了? What's wrong?
没事 Nothing.
你怕我 No, you're scared of me.
不是 No, I'm not.
你想看我拍过最美的事吗? You want to see the most beautiful thing I've ever filmed?
那一天很奇妙 再过几分钟就要下雪 It was one of those days where it's a minute away from snowing...
空气中充满能量 ...and there's this electricity in the air.
几乎听得到 You can almost hear it.
对吗? Right?
这个塑胶袋... And this bag was just...
就和我跳起舞来 ...dancing with me.
像一个小孩求我陪他玩 Like a little kid, begging me to play with it.
整整十五分钟 For 1 5 minutes.
那一天我突然发现 That's the day I realized that there was this...
事物的背后都有一种生命 ...entire life behind things...
一股慈悲的力量 ...and this incredibly benevolent force
让我知道其实我不必害怕 that wanted me to know that there was no reason to be afraid...
永远不必怕 ...ever.
影片比不上亲眼目睹 Video's a poor excuse, I know.
不过它让我牢记这件事 But it helps me remember.
我必须牢记 I need to remember.
有时候这个世界... Sometimes there is so much...
拥有太多的美 ...beauty... in the world.
我好像无法承受 I feel like I can't take it.
我的心... And my heart...
差一点就要崩溃 ...is just going to cave in.
天啊 几点了? Oh, my God. What time is it?
抱歉我这么晚 Sorry I'm late.
没关系 That's quite all right, dear.
我跟你爸在谈他的工作 Your father and I were just discussing his day at work.
老公 跟女儿谈谈吧 Why don't you tell our daughter about it, honey?
今天我辞职不干 我叫老板去死 Janie, today I quit myjob. Then I told my boss to go fuck himself
还勒索他给我六万元 把芦笋传给我 and blackmailed him for almost $60,000. Pass the asparagus.
你爸认为这种事很光荣 Your father seems to think this kind of behavior is something to be proud of.
你妈只想让我活得像个囚犯 Your mother seems to prefer I go through life like a prisoner
让我的小弟弟无用武之地 while she keeps my dick in a jar under the sink.
你怎么能说这种话? How dare you speak to me that way in front of her?
你被开除 I marvel that you can be so contemptuous of me
还敢这么大声说话 on the same day that you lose your job!
我没有被开除 好吗? 是老子不干的 I didn't lose it. It's not like, "Where'd myjob go?" I quit!
把芦笋传给我 Someone pass the asparagus, please.
谢谢你让我一个人 Thank you for putting me under the added pressure
负担家计 of being the sole breadwinner now.
我找到工作 I already have a job.
你根本没有想到房贷 Don't give a second thought as to who's gonna pay the mortgage.
你只会把问题丢给我 让我搞定一切 We'll just leave it all to Carolyn! "You're gonna take care of everything?"
好像我不介意 "Yes, I don't mind."
一个人背负起家计重担 "You mean everything? You don't mind having the sole responsibility?
你却潇洒地辞职不干 Your husband feels he can quit his job..."
拜托谁把芦笋传给我好吗? Will someone pass the fucking asparagus?
我不想管你们 I'm not gonna be a part of this.
给我坐下 Sit down!
我受不了你们把我当隐形人 I am sick and tired of being treated like I don't exist.
你们想做什么都行 You two do whatever you want to do whenever you want,
我不会抱怨 and I don't complain. All I want...
不会吗? 我一定是耳聋了 You don't complain? Please! Excuse me, excuse me!
你不是在抱怨吗? I must be psychotic! If you don't complain, what is this?
拜托你 Yeah, let's bring in the laugh meter
别让我笑掉大牙 and see how loud it gets on that one! You don't...
老婆 别打岔 Don't interrupt me, honey.
还有一件事 And another thing.
从现在起 音乐要换着听 From now on, we're going to alternate our dinner music
不是只有我这么想 because, frankly, and I don't think I'm alone here,
这种轻音乐难听死了 I am really tired of this Lawrence Welk shit.
走开 Go away!
小珍 让我进去 Honey, please let me in.
我不想让你看到刚才那一幕 不过我也很庆幸 I wish that you hadn't witnessed that awful scene, but in a way, I'm glad.
为什么? 你跟老爸都很变态 Why? So I can see what freaks you and Dad really are?
我变态? Me?
妈 别这样 Oh, God. Christ, Mom.
我很庆幸... No, I'm glad because...
现在你学会人生最重要的一课 Because you're old enough now to learn
你不能靠别人只能靠自己 the most important lesson in life:
你这辈子只能靠自己 You cannot count on anyone except yourself.
很悲哀 不过是真的 You know, it's sad but true.
越早学会这点越好 And the sooner you learn it, the better.
我没心情跟你演欢乐一家亲 Look, Mom, I really don't feel like having a Kodak moment here, OK?
没良心的小贱人 You ungrateful little brat!
你拥有这一切 Just look at everything you have!
我小时候只能住小公寓 When I was your age, I lived in a duplex!
哪来这么大的房子? We didn't even have our own house.
小畜生 You little bastard!
-不 我只是... -你是怎么打开的? - No, I just... - How did you get in there?
说啊! 说啊! How? How?
给我起来 Come on, get up! Come on!
起来 Get up!
还手呀 小孬种 Fight back, you little pussy!
我不会还手 No, sir, I won't fight you!
你是怎么打开的? How?! How did you get in there?
用东西撬开的 I picked the lock, sir.
你在找什么? 钱? What were you looking for? Money?
你又在吸毒吗? Are you on dope again?
我只想让女朋友看纳粹瓷盘 No, sir. I wanted to show my girlfriend your Nazi plate.
女朋友? A girlfriend?
对 她住在隔壁 Yes, sir. She lives next door.
她叫小珍 Her name's Jane.
我这是为你好 This is for your own good, boy.
你一点都不尊重别人的事物 You have no respect for other people's things and for authority.
是 对不起 Yes, sir. I'm sorry.
你不能爱怎样就怎样 Can't just go around doing whatever you feel like!
你得懂得守规矩 You can't! There are rules in life.
是的 Yes, sir.
你要懂得规矩 You need structure, yeah.
你要有纪律 You need discipline!Discipline.
是 谢谢你教我 别对我失望 Yes, sir. Thank you for trying to teach me. Don't give up on me, Dad.
芮奇 Ricky...
别动我的东西 You stay out of there!
班太太 一开始我以为你不行 I gotta say, when you first came here, I thought you would be hopeless.
不过你是天生好手 But you're a natural.
我只知道 我好爱开枪 Well, all I know is, I love shooting this gun!
别阻止我 我一定要高飞 Don't tell me not to fly I've simply got to
若是跌倒也是我不是你 If someone takes a spill It's me and not you
别让乌云遮掩我的阳光 Don't bring around the cloud to rain on my parade
我要昂首阔步 击鼓高歌 I'm gonna march my band out, I'll beat my drum
要是我失败 轮到你出击 And if I'm found out, Your turn at bat, sir
至少我试过 虽败也犹荣 At least I didn't fake it Hat, sir, So what? I didn't make it
没有人...我说没有人... Nobody... I said nobody
没有人... Nobody
能让乌云遮掩我的阳光 Had better rain on my parade
怎么了? What?
那是谁的车? Whose car is that out front?
我的 Mine.
70年火鸟跑车 1970 Pontiac Firebird,
梦寐以求的跑车终于到手 the car I've always wanted, and now I have it.
我最屌 I rule.
旧车呢? Where's the Camry?
拿去换了 I traded it in.
你不是该先问我吗? Shouldn't you have consulted me first?
我想想看 Let me think.
不必 你又没开过 No. You never drove it.
你换了发型吗? Have you done something different?
你好漂亮 You look great.
小珍呢? Where's Jane?
她不在家 Jane not home.
这么说来... We have...
整间房子只有我们俩 ...the whole house... to ourselves.
真是的 卡洛琳 Christ, Carolyn.
你是几时变得... When did you become so...
这么不开心? ...joyless?
不开心? Joyless?
我没有不开心 I am not joyless.
大秀才 我有很多事你不知道 There happens to be a lot about me that you don't know, Mr. Smarty Man.
我现在是天天开心 There is plenty ofjoy in my life.
你以前在舞会上... Whatever happened to that girl...
觉得无聊会假装休克 ...who used to fake seizures at frat parties when she got bored?
你还爬到我们的小公寓屋顶 Who used to run up to the roof of our first apartment building
对着直升机露屁股 to flash the traffic helicopters?
难道你都忘了吗? Have you totally forgotten about her?
我可没忘 Because I haven't.
你会把啤酒倒在沙发上 Lester, you're gonna spill beer on the couch.
又怎样? 这只是沙发 So what? It's just a couch.
这是四千块的意大利高级沙发 This is a $4,000 sofa upholstered in ltalian silk!
不是普通的沙发 This is not just a couch!
这只是沙发 It's just a couch!
不是你的人生 This isn't life!
这只是物质 This is just stuff.
你却把物质看得比生命重要 太荒唐了 And it's become more important to you than living. Honey, that's just nuts.
我只是想帮你 I'm only trying to help you!
别拍我 Don't.
为什么? Why?
看到自己很奇怪 我不喜欢自己 It's weird watching myself. I don't like how I look.
你不知道你很美吗? Can't believe you don't know how beautiful you are.
我不想听你说疯话 Look, I'm not gonna sit here for that shit.
你觉得怎样? How does it feel now?
很好 Fine.
你不觉得很赤裸吗? You don't feel naked?
我本来就是赤裸 I am naked.
你懂我的意思 You know what I mean.
说说疗养院的事 So tell me about being in the hospital.
我十五岁哈草被我爸逮到 When I was 1 5, my dad caught me smoking dope.
他决定把我送到军事学校 He totally freaked and decided to send me to military school.
要我学会规矩和纪律 I told you his thing about structure and discipline, right?
不过我被学校开除 Well, of course, I got kicked out.
我们吵了一大架 Dad and I had this huge fight.
他打我 He hit me.
隔天同学讥笑我的发型 And the next day at school, some kid made a crack about my haircut.
我突然抓狂 And I just snapped.
我想要杀死他 I wanted to kill him.
要不是我被拉开 I would've killed him...
他早就挂了 ...if they hadn't pulled me off.
于是我爸就把我送进疯人院 That's when my dad put me in the hospital.
我在里头待了两年 They drugged me up and left me in there for two years.
你一定恨死他了 You must really hate him.
他不是坏人 He's not a bad man.
我爸敢这么做我一定恨死他 You'd better believe I'd hate my dad if he did something like that to me.
等等 我早就恨他了 Wait. I already do hate my dad.
为什么? Why?
他是个混蛋 He's a total asshole.
他迷上安琪拉 恶心死了 He's got this crush on my friend Angela, and it's disgusting.
你希望他迷上你 You'd rather he had the crush on you.
拜托 才不是 Gross. No.
我只希望他能多注意我一点 But it'd be nice if I was anywhere near as important to him as she is.
你觉得他是好好先生 你错了 I know you think my dad's harmless, but you're wrong.
他对我造成很大的心理伤害 He's doing massive psychological damage to me.
怎么说? How?
我也得守规矩 Well, now, l, too, need structure.
还需要一点纪律 A little fucking discipline.
我是说真的 I'm serious, though.
他是真的伤害了我 How could he not be damaging me?
我需要一个模范父亲 I need a father who's a role model.
不是看到漂亮美眉 Not some horny geek-boy who's gonna spray his shorts
就流口水的色鬼老爸 whenever I bring a girlfriend home from school.
他逊毙了 What a lame-o.
应该有人帮他结束可悲的生命 Someone really should just put him out of his misery.
要我干掉他吗? Want me to kill him for you?
好 你肯吗? Yeah. Would you?
你得花一笔钱 It'll cost you.
我十岁起就当保母 I've been babysitting since I was about ten.
存了三千元 I've got almost $3,000.
本来是用来隆胸的 Course, I was saving it up for a boob job.
但是... But...
这么做不太好 You know, that's not a very nice thing to do.
请杀手干掉你老爸 Hiring someone to kill your dad.
我猜我不是好女孩 I guess I'm not a very nice girl, then, am l?
你知道我在说笑 对吧? You know I'm not serious, right?
当然了 Of course.
我们能相遇真的很幸运 You know how lucky we are to have found each other?
有一张海报上面写 Remember those posters that said:
每一天都是你一生的开始 "Today is the first day of the rest of your life"?
只有一天不是 Well, that's true of every day except one:
你死的那一天 The day you die.
小珍 快点 Jane, hurry up.
我有重要的约会 I've got a very important appointment.
今天安琪拉能来过夜吗? Mom, is it OK if Angela sleeps over tonight?
当然了 欢迎呀 Well, of course. She's always welcome.
我还以为你们闹翻了呢 I thought you two had a fight. I haven't seen her around here in a while.
怎么了? What?
我不好意思带她来 I've been too embarrassed to bring her over.
因为你那副色迷迷的样子 Because of you and that way you behave.
乱讲 我根本没跟她说过话 What are you talking about? I've barely even spoken to her.
你老是盯着她看 像个老色鬼 好恶心 You stare at her all the time! Like you're drunk! It's disgusting!
你最好小心 Watch yourself, Jane,
别变成你妈那种母老虎 or you're gonna turn into a real bitch, just like your mother!
该死 Fuck.
准备好了吗? You ready to go?
你不必送我 我要跟小珍一起上学 I don't need a ride. I'm going in with Jane and her mom.
早 Oh, morning.
芮奇 你好吗? Hey, Ricky. How's it going?
还不错 Pretty decent, Mr. Burnham. Hey, hey.
赶快做一份超级起士堡 I need that Super Smiley with cheese ASAP!
别这么急 小兄弟 You need more than that, my little hombre.
有什么好吃的? Yeah. What's good here?
没有 Nothing!
那么我们就得吃自己 Then I guess we'll just have to be bad, won't we?
我要麦笑堡 薯条跟奶昔 I'll have a Double Smiley sandwich,curly fries and a vanilla shake.
来两份 Make that two!
七块九毛八 请到窗口付帐 That'll be $7.98. Please drive up to the window. Thank you.
激烈运动后来点垃圾食物无妨 I think we deserve a little junk food after the workout we had this morning.
你太棒了 Did you know that?
过奖了 Thank you. I'm flattered.
笑一笑 欢迎光临 Smile! You're at Mister Smiley's!
今天的特餐是烤香肠堡 Would you like to try our new beef and cheese pot pie on a stick?
只要一块九毛九 Just $1 .99 for a limited time only?
我们刚上完课 We were just at a seminar.
巴迪 他是... Buddy, this is my...
她的老公 Her husband.
我们见过面 We've met before,
这次你一定会记得我 but something tells me you're going to remember me this time.
这下你可被逮到了 You are so busted.
这不关你的事 This really doesn't concern you!
贞妮是点餐经理 这是她的地盘 Actually, Janine is senior drive-thru manager, so you kind of are on her turf.
你们很速配 So, this makes sense.
赖斯特... Oh, Lester...
没关系 我希望你快乐 Honey, it's OK. I want you to be happy.
你们要特制酱料吗? Would you like Smiley sauce with that?
别闹了 Lester, just stop it!
错了 No, no. You...
你不能再对我颐指气使 ...don't get to tell me what to do...
再也不能了 ...ever... again.
对不起 I'm sorry.
我们得分开一阵子 I guess we should cool it for a while.
否则我得付一大笔赡养费 I'm facing a potentially very expensive divorce.
我完全瞭解 No. I understand completely.
想要成功就得维持完美形象 In order to be successful, one must project an image of success at all times.
别哭 别哭 Stop it. Stop it.
该死 Shit.
我要到隔壁 I have to run next door.
小珍忘了她的课本 她得做功课 Jane left her geometry book in my bag. She needs it to do her homework.
你跟小变态经常上床对吧? You and psycho-boy are fucking on a regular basis now, right?
没有 No.
少来 告诉我嘛 Come on, you can tell me.
他的小鸡鸡大吗? Does he have a big dick?
我才不会告诉你 事情不是这样 I'm not going to talk about his dick with you, OK? It's not like that.
难道他没有小鸡鸡吗? Not like what? Doesn't he have one?
你为什么不想说? Why don't you want to talk about it?
谁跟我上床我都会跟你说 I tell you every single detail about every guy that I fuck.
也许你不该说 Yeah, and maybe you shouldn't, all right?
也许我根本就不想听 Maybe I really don't want to hear about all that.
你有男朋友就不屑听吗? So now that you have a boyfriend, you're above it?
你需要真正的男人 We got to get you a real man.
-你有卷烟纸吗? -有 - You got any papers? - Yeah.
在雪茄盒里 In the cigar box right over there.
有点原则 拒绝我嘛 Put up a fight, dude. You are such a pushover.
就说你不要嘛 "No, I can't, really, no. OK."
你应该学会卷烟 You should learn to roll a joint.
-嗨 -妈呢? - Hi. - Where's Mom?
不知道 Don't know.
伯父好 Hi, Mr. Burnham.
你好 Hi.
看看你 Wow. Look at you.
你有健身吗? Have you been working out?
有一点 Some.
看得出来 You can really tell.
看看你的臂肌 Look at those arms.
你喜欢肌肉男吗? You like muscles?
我去看小珍在干嘛 I should probably go see what Jane's up to.
钱是哪儿来的? Where did you get that?
我的薪水 From myjob.
不要骗我 You don't lie to me.
我看你去找他 Now, I saw you with him.
你在监视我? You were watching me?
他逼你做什么? What did he make you do?
你以为我跟班先生... Dad, you don't really think me and Mr. Burnham...
别笑我 Don't you laugh at me!
我不能看着我独子变成同志 Now, I will not sit back and watch my only son become a cocksucker!
老天 你到底有什么毛病? Jesus! What is it with you?
我发誓我会把你赶出家门 I swear to God I'll throw you out of this house and never look at you again!
你是说真的 You mean that.
当然了 You're damn straight I do!
你死了都比变成同志好 I'd rather you were dead than be a fucking faggot!
没错 You're right.
我是牛郎 I suck dick for money.
小子 闭嘴 Boy, don't start!
我最会吹箫 要价两千 $2,000. I'm that good.
滚出去 Get out!
要我搞也行 我保证让你爽歪歪 And you should see me fuck! I'm the best piece of ass in three states!
混帐 给我滚 我不想再看到你 Damn it, get out! I don't ever want to see you again!
你是可怜的老头儿 What a sad old man you are.
快滚 Get out.
妈 Mom...
我要走了 I'm leaving.
好 OK.
要穿件雨衣 Wear a raincoat.
真希望你能过得好些 I wish things would have been better for you.
好好照顾爸爸 Take care of Dad.
消除别人对你的威胁 ...disinvesting problems of power
别让他们让你害怕 and removing their ability to make us afraid.
这是自我进步的要决 This is the secret to "Me-Centered Living."
只要对自己的行为完全负责 Only by taking full responsibility for your actions and their solutions
就不会再受到他人的伤害 will you ever break free from the constant cycle of victimhood.
千万不要选择当一名弱者... You are only a victim if you choose to be a victim. We all have the power...
我们不能再当死党 I don't think we can be friends anymore.
你对性太保守了 You're way too uptight about sex.
别跟我老爸上床 Just don't fuck my dad, all right?
拜托 Please?
为什么? Why not?
爸 别烦我们 Dad, leave us alone!
是我 It's me.
我今晚要走 你肯跟来吗? If I had to leave tonight, would you come with me?
什么? What?
我今晚去纽约 你肯来吗? If I had to go to New York to live, tonight, would you come with me?
肯 Yes.
别开玩笑 You guys can't be serious!
你只是小孩子 他是个大疯子 You're just a kid, and he's, like, a mental case.
你们会流落街头 You'll end up living in a box on the street.
我不比你小 I'm no more a kid than you are!
我们可以用我的钱 We can use my plastic surgery money.
不必 我有四万块 We won't have to. I have over $40,000.
我在纽约有朋友帮忙 know people in the city that can help us.
别的毒贩吗? What, other drug dealers?
对 Yes.
你疯了才会跟他走 Jane, you'd be out of your mind to go with him.
你管我干嘛? Why do you even care?
我是你朋友 Because you're my friend!
她不是你朋友 She's not your friend.
她只是利用你来满足自己的优越感 She's someone you use to feel better about yourself.
去死吧 疯子 Go fuck yourself, psycho!
闭嘴 贱人 Shut up, bitch!
他是个怪胎 Jane! He's a freak!
我也是 Well, then so am l!
我们是怪胎 永远不能像你 And we'll always be freaks, and we'll never be like other people.
你很完美 永远不会是怪胎 And you'll never be a freak 'cause you're just too perfect!
至少我不丑 Yeah, well, at least I'm not ugly.
你很丑陋 Yes, you are.
你也很无趣 而且你很平凡 And you're boring. And you're totally ordinary.
你很清楚 And you know it.
你们俩是天生一对 You two deserve each other.
老天 你都湿透了 Jesus, man, you're soaked!
你找芮奇? 他在小珍房间 You want me to get Ricky? He's in Jane's room.
你还好吧? Are you OK?
你太太呢? Where's your wife?
不知道 I don't know.
大概在跟中介王上床吧 Probably out fucking that dorky prince-of-real-estate asshole.
你知道吗? And you know what?
我不在乎 I don't care.
你太太跟别的男人上床 Your wife is with another man
你却不在乎? and you don't care?
对 Nope.
我们的婚姻只是个幌子 Our marriage is just for show.
为了表示我们很正常 A commercial for how normal we are
其实根本就不是 when we're anything but.
老天 你在发抖 Jesus, man, you are shaking.
你最好把衣服脱掉 We really ought to get you out of these clothes.
是啊 Yeah.
不会有事 It's OK.
我... I am...
告诉我你需要什么 You just tell me what you need.
没事了 It's OK.
对不起 I'm sorry.
你误解了 You got the wrong idea.
我拒绝当弱者 "I refuse to be a victim."
把这句话当成座右铭勉励自己 When this becomes your mantra, constantly reinforcing your...
我拒绝当弱者 I refuse to be a victim!
你不介意我开音响吧? I hope you don't mind if I play the stereo.
不介意 Not at all.
心情不好 Bad night?
不是不好 只是... Not really bad. Just...
很奇怪 ...strange.
相信我 我碰到的事更奇怪 Believe me, it couldn't possibly be any stranger than mine.
我跟小珍吵架 Jane and I had a fight.
是为了你 It was about you.
她在生我的气 因为... She's mad at me because...
我说你很性感 ...I said I think you're sexy.
你要喝一口吗? Do you want a sip?
好 Sure.
那... So...
你要不要告诉我 ...are you going to tell me?
你想要什么? What do you want?
我不知道 I don't know.
你...不知道 You... don't know.
你要什么? What do you want?
别装蒜 Are you kidding?
我要你 I want you.
我一见到你就想要你 I've wanted you since the first moment I saw you.
你是我见过最美的东西 You are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.
你不觉得我很平凡? You don't think I'm ordinary?
你一点都不平凡 You couldn't be ordinary if you tried.
谢谢你 Thank you.
我觉得当平凡人是最糟的事 I don't think there's anything worse than being ordinary.
我拒绝当弱者... I refuse to be a victim. I refuse to be a victim.
我有话要对你说 Lester... I have something I have to say to you.
你害怕吗? Are you scared?
我不会害怕 I don't get scared.
我爸妈会找我 My parents will try to find me.
我爸妈不会 Mine won't.
我还是处女 This is my first time.
别开玩笑 You're kidding.
对不起 I'm sorry.
我还是想 I still want to do it.
只是... I just...
我想先说 ...thought I should tell you,
免得你觉得我...不够好 in case you wondered why I wasn't... better.
怎么了? What's wrong?
你不是说我很美吗? I thought you said I was beautiful.
你是很美 You are beautiful.
你是这么地美 You are so...
你是这么地美 ...beautiful.
我会是...最幸运的男人 And I would be a very... lucky man.
我觉得自己好蠢 I feel so stupid.
别这样 Don't.
对不起 I'm sorry.
你不必道歉 You have nothing to be sorry about.
没关系 It's OK.
一切都没事了 Everything's OK.
我刚才好饿 Wow. I was starving.
你要再吃吗? Do you want me to make another one?
不了 我饱了 No, I'm fine.
真的吗? You sure?
我还是有点怕 不过好多了 I'm still a little weirded out, but I feel better.
谢了 Thanks.
小珍好吗? How's Jane?
什么意思? What do you mean?
我是说... I mean...
她过得好吗? ...how's her life?
她快乐吗? Is she happy?
悲伤吗? Is she miserable?
我很想知道 她死也不肯告诉我 I'd really like to know, and she'd die before she'd ever tell me about it.
她真的很快乐 She's... she is really happy.
她觉得自己在谈恋爱 She thinks she's in love.
那很好 Good for her.
你好不好? How are you?
好久都没有人这么问我 It's been a long time since anybody asked me that.
我好极了 I'm great.
我得去上厕所 I've got to go to the bathroom.
我好极了 I'm great.
老天爷 Man, oh, man.
老天爷! Man, oh, man, oh, man.
天啊 Oh, my God!
听说人在死前的一秒钟 I had always heard your entire life flashes in front of your eyes
他的一生会闪过眼前 the second before you die.
首先 First of all...
其实不是一秒钟 ...that one second isn't a second at all.
而是延伸成无止尽的时间 It stretches on forever, like an ocean of time.
对我来说我的一生是躺在草地 For me, it was lying on my back at Boy Scout camp
看着流星雨 watching falling stars.
还有街道上枯黄的枫叶 And yellow leaves from the maple trees that lined our street.
或是奶奶手上像纸一样的皮肤 Or my grandmother's hands and the way her skin seemed like paper.
还有我第一次看到东尼表哥 And the first time I saw my cousin Tony's
那辆全新的火鸟跑车 brand-new Firebird.
还有小珍 And Janie.
小珍 Janie.
还有卡洛琳 And Carolyn.
我猜我死了应该生气才对 I guess I could be pretty pissed off about what happened to me,
但世界这么美 不该一直生气 but it's hard to stay mad when there's so much beauty in the world.
有时候一次看完会无法承受 Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much.
我的心像涨满的汽球随时会爆炸 My heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst.
后来我记得要放轻松 And then I remember to relax
别一直想要紧抓着不放 and stop trying to hold on to it.
所有的美就像雨水一样洗涤我 And then it flows through me like rain
让我对我这卑微愚蠢的生命 and I can't feel anything but gratitude
在每一刻都充满了感激 for every single moment of my stupid little life.
你一定不知道我在说什么 You have no idea what I'm talking about, I'm sure.
别担心 But don't worry.
有一天你会明白 You will someday.