spies they're masters of secrecy
surveillance and kicking the debt of
people I know spies are also known for
finding themselves in sexy situations
today I'm going to try beating a spy at
their own sexy game is the job of a spy
to be a James Bond to run around make
love to people and kill people that is
the biggest myth in the world Hollywood
obviously has to sell tickets and if you
really shown where the average spy does
be able to be bored out of their mind
true spies draw zero attention in
themselves that way you can walk down
this street nobody's gonna think twice
about you what does the CIA spy do
there's something called that s ADR
cycle spotting assessing developing
recruiting spot the person who might
have the information develop them to
where they fall in love with you and
then of course recruiting are you
seducing people and making a love to
people in order to get them on to your
side American spies tend to keep their
noses clean do they keep other parts of
their body clean or do they I did shower
this morning yes what was the most
dangerous mission you've ever been sent
on if I told you I'd have to kill you
you could tell me right now and then
kill me 60 years right on my deathbed or
I could take my tactical pen out of my
pocket you have in your neck and in
there right now are you happy with the
job that you proceed well I had a blast
it's a wonderful place to work they
treat you very very well but it is a
single man's game so I knew far too many
guys who are divorced who didn't love
their love their wives and like I said
wonderful place to work they treat you
good but it was time to do other things
so now we're basically a private
intelligence service so you hire us to
run surveillance on somebody you hire us
if you're going overseas anyone have a
private bodyguard maybe somebody's
hacking your stuff and you want our
cyber types to go in there and make sure
you're safe so we're the private CIA
being a CIA spy you have to be hyper
aware and hyper alert of everything
correct so now I'm going to challenge
you
I guarantee I can pass a naked photo of
myself to an accomplice in a public park
without you knowing where the photo went
wait a min you said naked I'm going to
give you ten minutes to watch me at the
end of those ten minutes you have one
guess where my nudie pic is that's nine
minutes too long but that's all right if
you guess correctly I have to eat my own
earwax what good is a tea your own
earwax it's like your own boogers which
you probably do every day but he's
somebody else's boogers or somebody
else's a year wax no that's disgusting
would make me puke if I Liz I will eat
someone else's earwax what are you
afraid of I hate small spaces I hate
cats because I'm definitely larger to
him if you guess incorrectly I will put
you in a small box challenge accepted I
don't like to lose how confident are you
that you're going to win I wouldn't be
here if I didn't know I was gonna win I
wouldn't have flown in here from Utah
good luck you too my friend what the spy
didn't know was that I spent the last
months planning the perfect strategy the
first step of my master plan is to hide
my naked photo somewhere the Sun don't
shine I could tell you what I mean by
that but then I'd have to kill you now
it's time for me to make a spy cry you
might be wondering why I'm suddenly
wearing a fluffy red robe for this
challenge I'll tell you later when
you're older the challenge begins in
three two one as the timer begins I fold
my nudie pics several times mike has his
picture I'm making a nice and small that
way it's easier to pass then a man
carrying a frisbee kisses me on the lips
he did a good job of trying to distract
me by doing what he's doing there
this guy hands me one of his briefcases
then merrily walks away to play frisbee
by himself who was this mysterious man
willing to kiss me in order to hide my
naked photo my family comes from a long
line of witches that originated from
Lowell New Orleans in total I hired for
strangers to kiss each other and trade
briefcases as much as possible here's a
little more about my ragtag group of
cool cats I hired this guy to play with
a squirt gun I have absolutely no
problem making out with a bunch of
different random members I'm freshly
single it's actually kind of cathartic I
hired this guy to play with dinosaur
toys you get to really know people that
way in the mouth Simpson you know it's
better than the handshake it's third in
the handshake I hired this guy to blow
I used to sing in an Iron Maiden tribute
band for six years because I knew this
file was going to be watching everyone's
body language I instructed all my
accomplices to act as odd as possible
why Seymour why don't you love mother I
don't love you I do next I lie down on
the grass open the briefcase and place
my picture inside remember this moment
hint hint wink wink wink okay now he has
a briefcase so he slipped it in the
briefcase now it's disappeared from his
hand nope can I look at the model
suddenly an angry dude screams
accusations that I have his briefcase
being the kind hearted person I am I
express my disagreement with a polite
gesture so he slipped it in the
briefcase now it's disappeared from his
hand there's a lot of people going on a
lot of distractions it's in the
briefcase right now you may recognize
this ugly man is my best friend then he
agreed to be my co-conspirator on this
strange mission two days ago
Ben and I spent five minutes
choreographing a fight to distract the
spy what experience do we have planning
brawls in college Ben had four years of
stage combat training and experience in
junior high in high school I did
backyard wrestling for four years so Ben
and I are probably equally skilled at
faking fights Ben gives me a back
bodydrop the wrestling crowd goes crazy
okay now you got to keep true love that
briefcase okay that's a good idea
as I agonize on the ground Ben picks up
my briefcase in saunters away he then
needs squirt gun guy who promptly sprays
him in the eyes
the two men pick up each other's
briefcases and had separate ways
marches up to this by his secret mission
to deliver the most distracting and
bizarre performance impossible the
intelligence business intelligence
operatives always use distractions right
there but you've got to be very clear to
never lose your target this has been a
weird day I kind of just blacked out no
matter what's going on it's about having
a laser-like focus which is exactly what
I'm having on right now so it doesn't
matter if there's one person or a
hundred people you just got to focus on
one squirt gun guy aka mr. squirts
confidently struts up to another
stranger these two dudes smooch and then
swap black leather cases these guys are
pretty deep kissers I can feel my
tonsils still gotta track the briefcase
so they've been swapped and switch is
still in the briefcase but which
briefcase it is in still feeling the
pain of losing a battle too then I
remain on the ground until a man playing
what dinosaur toys approaches me he
kneels beside me and we begin making out
like rebellious teenagers earlier in
this video I said remember this moment
intent wink wink wink next I lie down on
the grass open the briefcase and place
my picture inside remember this moment
in imp week week I said something
purposely misleading at that moment in
my spy challenge I had just opened a
briefcase and presumably placed my photo
inside I wanted you and the spy to
believe my picture was put inside the
briefcase but I actually placed the
nudie pic inside my mouth now is this
gentleman I've never met before makes
out with me
I used my tongue the French kiss the
nudie pic into his mouth he asked me to
put the naked picture of my mouth and it
made me feel both honored but also a bit
nervous during my entire fight with Ben
the photo was in my mouth technically I
didn't lie to you
I just didn't finish my sentence
properly if you wish to complain about
my deception please Senate
a letter to my home address shown here I
stand up and mosey over to the man
blowing bubbles a lot of different
briefcases yeah you guys are getting me
totally confused or are you I literally
knew nothing about this guy before we
went to the tonsil hockey hall of fame
together Mike was an okay kisser I felt
maybe I was a like a bowl of Slurpee
food after our incredible kids my new
friend returns to blowing bubbles then
continued doing his best to suck up the
Spy's attention with a unique
performance part of me wants to push you
over which I think I'm gonna do right
now and you oh you held it for a while
I'm impressed I have no change for any
change you never do mike is a fantastic
is there I mean the mustache is really
he really goes for it and he really
makes you work if you're concerned about
the amount of germs being traded relax I
made everyone use mouthwash before our
kissing festival again you're blocking
me from Mike's view Mike is yogi is
praying Oh confusing confusing I reach
into everyone's pockets pretend to grab
important secrets and stuff my own
pockets well there was nothing to say in
that time and of course he's got to make
that again what is he's living in the
pocket okay one minute remaining Oh
pressures mounting you know Mike making
out I think I probably said that eight
thousand times on this tape we've got
Mike's making out that's a good now see
these guys are doing a fantastic job of
distracting of acting unique taim ease
up who will the spy guess has my nudie
pic is it the guy who kissed me the guy
who kissed me
the guy who kissed me the guy who fought
me or the guy who kissed me
[Music]
the spies allowed one guess at who has
my nudie pic I actually forgot that the
photo was in someone's mouth and when a
couple of them were like making out with
me deeply I thought they were trying to
transfer the photo and I got concerned I
didn't know if I had it or not for a
good second or two when the challenge
was over and the spy was about to guess
I was thinking dang I think it's me for
sure I knew there were too many moving
pieces for him to possibly keep track of
it I still wasn't totally sure what was
happening let's say the gentleman here
with the frisbee inside that briefcase I
was like this is it here he comes
it's inside this briefcase the picture I
don't want to see gross still there
still looks good I've seen bigger time
for me to punish this spy you lost I did
get in the box
since the Spy is claustrophobic I forced
him to squeeze inside a tiny box he also
hates cats
so I'm forcing him to dress like one
hey you used to great distractions the
kissing of the briefcase I had to choose
one of them I didn't see the kiss body
language drawing attention I didn't see
any papers going through
so my 50/50 shot was okay it's got to be
the briefcase that kisses the
distraction which is not the real one
how long do I have to wear this
ridiculous outfit I'm gonna shut the lid
onions wonderful fantastic
[Music]
another successful mission who should I
outcome are Nick how much your wife's do
you have you know what I think the
challenge should be especially if I'm
going to get in some little box is eat
my earwax or somebody else's earwax
what kind of earwax do you have I don't
know mucusy is it like wet or is it like
hard kind of crisp kind of buggery its
waxy