1
00:00:00,870 --> 00:00:02,070
我的妈呀

2
00:00:02,070 --> 00:00:04,010
宝拉·阿巴杜这是怎么了

3
00:00:02,510 --> 00:00:04,320
前美偶评委  美女

4
00:00:04,010 --> 00:00:05,150
怎么这副德行了

5
00:00:05,150 --> 00:00:07,360
爸  那是史蒂芬·泰勒

6
00:00:05,800 --> 00:00:08,180
新美偶评委  摇滚爷爷  打扮夸张

7
00:00:10,540 --> 00:00:12,940
看着还不错

8
00:00:12,940 --> 00:00:14,360
天呐  奥普拉这是怎么了

9
00:00:13,250 --> 00:00:15,080
脱口秀主持人  黑人女性  身形富态

10
00:00:14,360 --> 00:00:15,730
怎么这副德行了

11
00:00:15,610 --> 00:00:17,680
美偶评委  黑人男性  体型微像文斯

12
00:00:15,730 --> 00:00:17,710
那是兰迪·杰克逊

13
00:00:18,740 --> 00:00:21,490
噢  看着还不错

14
00:00:22,770 --> 00:00:23,450
嗨

15
00:00:23,450 --> 00:00:24,690
嗨  看房进行得怎么样

16
00:00:24,690 --> 00:00:27,560
有几个人有点兴趣

17
00:00:27,560 --> 00:00:29,010
你嘴唇上面是啥鬼东西

18
00:00:29,010 --> 00:00:31,360
起了点疹子  今天早上没刮胡子

19
00:00:31,360 --> 00:00:33,350
真不相信  居然长这么快

20
00:00:33,350 --> 00:00:34,410
家族特征

21
00:00:34,410 --> 00:00:36,080
我们家人胡子都长得快

22
00:00:36,080 --> 00:00:37,530
老艾  我怎么没看你留过胡子

23
00:00:37,530 --> 00:00:40,310
胡子什么的  是随他母亲娘家人

24
00:00:42,200 --> 00:00:44,570
确切得说  是随他母亲

25
00:00:45,780 --> 00:00:47,650
不光是她娘家人啊

26
00:00:47,650 --> 00:00:49,490
我也长胡子啊

27
00:00:51,740 --> 00:00:53,320
拜托诶  你知道的

28
00:00:53,320 --> 00:00:55,620
你脸上半根毛都长不出来

29
00:00:58,010 --> 00:01:00,230
跟你打赌  我的胡子比你长得茂盛

30
00:01:01,160 --> 00:01:02,420
想让比试变得有趣点吗

31
00:01:02,420 --> 00:01:04,770
拜托了  有点趣吧

32
00:01:11,480 --> 00:01:13,270
你好  老艾  我是罗斯玛丽·潘沃斯

33
00:01:13,270 --> 00:01:14,040
你隔壁的邻居

34
00:01:14,040 --> 00:01:15,820
罗斯玛丽呀  我就知道你得回来

35
00:01:15,820 --> 00:01:18,000
亲完我的妞儿一般都回来

36
00:01:19,330 --> 00:01:21,000
首先  我没亲你

37
00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:23,430
-是你亲我  -开玩笑

38
00:01:24,340 --> 00:01:26,350
我就是随便嚼舌头

39
00:01:26,350 --> 00:01:29,060
就跟你亲我的时候似的

40
00:01:30,310 --> 00:01:31,670
再说一遍  是你亲我

41
00:01:31,670 --> 00:01:33,070
不过我不想提那个了

42
00:01:33,070 --> 00:01:34,510
我的嘴很紧的

43
00:01:34,510 --> 00:01:36,080
不像你的嘴

44
00:01:37,160 --> 00:01:38,950
亲我的时候一点都不紧

45
00:01:38,950 --> 00:01:41,620
随便吧  我不想多跟你这儿耗了

46
00:01:41,620 --> 00:01:42,380
我是过来给你一些

47
00:01:42,380 --> 00:01:44,350
作为弗林瑞志业主协会新任会长

48
00:01:44,350 --> 00:01:46,060
会用得上的东西

49
00:01:46,060 --> 00:01:48,060
这是市政厅里我们贮藏室的钥匙

50
00:01:48,060 --> 00:01:49,250
再见

51
00:01:49,250 --> 00:01:50,980
-你会回来的  -不  我不会

52
00:01:56,090 --> 00:01:57,850
这小的是储藏柜的钥匙

53
00:01:57,850 --> 00:01:59,410
国外会在圣诞节期间表演"基督诞生"的短剧

54
00:01:57,850 --> 00:01:59,410
里面放的都是镇上居民表演"基督诞生"的录像

55
00:01:59,410 --> 00:02:00,950
不过已经不许再播放了

56
00:02:00,950 --> 00:02:03,430
但我们想不到不失礼的处理方法

57
00:02:03,430 --> 00:02:05,780
这个方头的是我储物柜的钥匙

58
00:02:05,780 --> 00:02:06,680
哟  弯了

59
00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:08,290
这个我拿走

60
00:02:08,290 --> 00:02:11,130
这蓝的谁也不知道干啥用的

61
00:02:11,130 --> 00:02:12,880
但也别扔了

62
00:02:12,880 --> 00:02:13,750
再见

63
00:02:13,750 --> 00:02:15,850
-你会回来的  -不  我不会

64
00:02:22,450 --> 00:02:23,900
业主协会首次会议

65
00:02:23,900 --> 00:02:25,580
明晚在你家召开

66
00:02:25,580 --> 00:02:26,950
作为副会长  我不得不出席

67
00:02:26,950 --> 00:02:29,160
除此之外  我跟你再无瓜葛

68
00:02:29,160 --> 00:02:31,410
-你会回来的  -我不会

69
00:02:37,720 --> 00:02:39,920
没留神把我家钥匙给你了

70
00:02:39,920 --> 00:02:44,920
■

71
00:02:39,920 --> 00:02:44,920
本字幕由 YYeTs人人影视 原创翻译制作
仅供学习 禁止用于任何商业盈利行为
 更多影视更新 请登陆 www.YYeTs.net

72
00:02:44,920 --> 00:02:54,110
■

73
00:02:44,920 --> 00:02:54,110
翻译：取子小Q  一灯大狮  小砂锅  天意  校对：大卫熊  
 时间轴：低调的小雨  后期：WiLL  总监：WiLL

74
00:02:54,110 --> 00:02:55,130
我特此宣布

75
00:02:55,130 --> 00:02:57,580
弗林瑞志业主协会会议开始

76
00:02:57,580 --> 00:02:59,810
出席者  艾德·古德森  罗斯玛丽·潘沃斯

77
00:02:59,810 --> 00:03:03,220
马文·丁格与厄文和丁丁·柯汉夫妇

78
00:03:06,170 --> 00:03:06,840
真巧啊

79
00:03:06,840 --> 00:03:08,800
你跟你护士姓一个姓

80
00:03:08,800 --> 00:03:10,110
多难得啊

81
00:03:10,110 --> 00:03:12,320
什么护士  我是他老婆

82
00:03:12,320 --> 00:03:13,940
他是我亲亲

83
00:03:15,480 --> 00:03:18,870
原谅我  没看出来他是你亲亲

84
00:03:18,870 --> 00:03:21,110
请记录  我向

85
00:03:21,110 --> 00:03:24,220
亲亲和丁丁·柯汉致歉

86
00:03:25,260 --> 00:03:26,240
记录完毕

87
00:03:26,240 --> 00:03:27,730
会长[也有总统的意思]先生  请发言

88
00:03:27,730 --> 00:03:30,890
多谢  国务卿女士

89
00:03:30,890 --> 00:03:32,570
叫我马文就可以

90
00:03:32,570 --> 00:03:36,330
在我任期内  有诸多传言

91
00:03:36,330 --> 00:03:40,100
例如传言我行贿  与副会长接吻等

92
00:03:41,900 --> 00:03:44,350
我保证  上述事件中只有一件是真的

93
00:03:44,350 --> 00:03:46,880
而我从未行贿

94
00:03:48,060 --> 00:03:49,230
我们这儿开会呢

95
00:03:49,230 --> 00:03:51,570
马文  开始第一项提案  好吗

96
00:03:51,570 --> 00:03:54,740
好的  这周五格洛斯特家举行修缮完成派对

97
00:03:54,740 --> 00:03:57,490
我们业主协会需派出代表参加

98
00:03:57,490 --> 00:03:59,400
通常由会长代表

99
00:03:59,400 --> 00:04:01,060
不去  散会

100
00:04:01,060 --> 00:04:03,510
等着  等着  必须得有人去啊

101
00:04:03,510 --> 00:04:05,280
周五晚上谁有空

102
00:04:05,280 --> 00:04:08,030
我们不行  是安息日[犹太节日]

103
00:04:10,210 --> 00:04:11,750
好吧  算了  我去好了

104
00:04:11,750 --> 00:04:14,010
只能推掉些安排

105
00:04:15,050 --> 00:04:16,830
我有安排的

106
00:04:16,830 --> 00:04:18,050
我也去好了

107
00:04:18,050 --> 00:04:20,020
我没安排

108
00:04:20,020 --> 00:04:21,440
讨论结束  散会

109
00:04:21,440 --> 00:04:24,040
等等  新事项还没开始说呢

110
00:04:24,040 --> 00:04:25,660
我提议

111
00:04:25,660 --> 00:04:28,430
在松树巷设置减速路障

112
00:04:28,430 --> 00:04:29,740
否决  那是我地盘

113
00:04:29,740 --> 00:04:31,700
-散会  -那也是我的地盘

114
00:04:31,700 --> 00:04:33,900
而那帮疯子把车飙到六十迈

115
00:04:33,900 --> 00:04:35,100
那不安全的

116
00:04:35,100 --> 00:04:36,540
爷开到六十迈

117
00:04:36,540 --> 00:04:38,690
撞上个路障才不安全

118
00:04:41,520 --> 00:04:43,590
你能不能为别人考虑一回

119
00:04:43,590 --> 00:04:45,470
不过我猜艾德·古德森

120
00:04:45,470 --> 00:04:47,170
绝不会给自己惹麻烦

121
00:04:47,170 --> 00:04:48,130
来投票吧

122
00:04:48,130 --> 00:04:50,960
有谁赞成在松树巷上装减速带

123
00:04:50,960 --> 00:04:52,020
我

124
00:04:52,020 --> 00:04:54,270
我的脚在哪

125
00:04:57,260 --> 00:04:59,360
好了  三个半人赞成

126
00:04:59,360 --> 00:05:00,610
有谁反对

127
00:05:00,610 --> 00:05:03,150
通过  我们要在松树巷

128
00:05:03,150 --> 00:05:04,490
-装减速带  -太好了

129
00:05:04,490 --> 00:05:06,860
我到隔壁填写申请材料

130
00:05:06,860 --> 00:05:08,590
休会

131
00:05:09,860 --> 00:05:10,750
差点就尴尬了

132
00:05:10,750 --> 00:05:12,630
我本来想穿和你一样的衣服的

133
00:05:16,020 --> 00:05:18,200
罗斯玛丽真火辣  对吧

134
00:05:18,200 --> 00:05:19,260
-是啊  -偷偷告诉你

135
00:05:19,260 --> 00:05:21,160
五年前她丈夫去世后  我就向其

136
00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:22,490
展开攻势了

137
00:05:22,490 --> 00:05:23,750
我打算在房屋修缮完成派对

138
00:05:23,750 --> 00:05:25,430
约她出去

139
00:05:25,430 --> 00:05:27,790
偷偷告诉你  我要搞定她

140
00:05:29,500 --> 00:05:31,430
这么龌龊

141
00:05:31,430 --> 00:05:34,180
随便啦  我们要怎么取消这减速带提案

142
00:05:34,180 --> 00:05:36,260
你是会长  你可以选择否决

143
00:05:36,260 --> 00:05:38,430
不过那样做也太混蛋了

144
00:05:38,430 --> 00:05:42,730
是挺混蛋的  我特此否决减速带提案

145
00:05:49,050 --> 00:05:51,960
有谁要我帮忙打扫吗

146
00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:54,050
我现在可是有小扫帚咯

147
00:05:58,810 --> 00:06:00,210
让我看看

148
00:06:04,170 --> 00:06:06,360
额滴马里奥大叔啊

149
00:06:07,870 --> 00:06:10,130
他鼻子以下嘴唇以上简直和

150
00:06:10,130 --> 00:06:12,940
汤姆·塞立克  浓密胡子大叔  著名电视剧演员

151
00:06:10,130 --> 00:06:12,940
汤姆·塞立克长得一模一样

152
00:06:14,520 --> 00:06:16,040
你还是现在就投降吧

153
00:06:16,040 --> 00:06:17,090
慢着

154
00:06:17,090 --> 00:06:18,390
还没到一个星期呢

155
00:06:18,390 --> 00:06:20,550
我的小宝贝会像雨后春笋般地冒出来的

156
00:06:20,550 --> 00:06:21,680
到那时候

157
00:06:21,680 --> 00:06:24,680
效果就会像《人与自然》快播视频里那样

158
00:06:28,320 --> 00:06:29,300
你那连胡须都算不上

159
00:06:29,300 --> 00:06:31,450
最多就是未来可能长成胡须的

160
00:06:31,450 --> 00:06:33,390
规划蓝图罢了

161
00:06:35,260 --> 00:06:36,300
一个礼拜后  我们走着瞧

162
00:06:36,300 --> 00:06:37,250
谁来当裁判

163
00:06:37,250 --> 00:06:38,370
纺必适  宝洁公司旗下去渍清洁产品

164
00:06:37,250 --> 00:06:38,370
纺必适上哪去了

165
00:06:38,370 --> 00:06:41,260
我要把"沙发发"的上的"恶丁丁"弄掉

166
00:06:43,560 --> 00:06:45,980
Judge  有裁判和批判的意思  老艾理解为批评兄弟俩

167
00:06:43,560 --> 00:06:45,980
老爹  我们要你来当裁判

168
00:06:45,980 --> 00:06:48,920
好啊  你们两个二缺玩意儿

169
00:06:53,570 --> 00:06:54,680
不好意思

170
00:06:54,680 --> 00:06:56,060
让大家久等了

171
00:06:56,060 --> 00:06:58,540
我一开始找不到材料  给你

172
00:06:58,540 --> 00:07:00,200
大家伙都上哪去了

173
00:07:00,200 --> 00:07:01,770
散会了

174
00:07:01,770 --> 00:07:02,780
什么时候的事

175
00:07:02,780 --> 00:07:04,850
-你出去多久了  -三十分钟

176
00:07:04,850 --> 00:07:07,350
那就是二十九分半钟以前

177
00:07:08,360 --> 00:07:09,560
真有你的

178
00:07:10,270 --> 00:07:11,790
你上任后第一次会议

179
00:07:12,940 --> 00:07:14,800
你觉得丁丁和厄文怎么样

180
00:07:14,800 --> 00:07:15,620
挺配的一对儿啊

181
00:07:15,620 --> 00:07:17,990
是啊  估计隆胸也是他付的钱

182
00:07:30,180 --> 00:07:32,110
想上楼吗

183
00:07:33,400 --> 00:07:34,590
为什么要上楼  楼上有什么

184
00:07:34,590 --> 00:07:37,180
有床

185
00:07:37,180 --> 00:07:38,510
中间凹下去的我来睡

186
00:07:38,510 --> 00:07:40,250
你睡高一点的地方

187
00:07:46,670 --> 00:07:48,150
真好笑啊

188
00:07:48,150 --> 00:07:49,310
我是认真的

189
00:07:49,310 --> 00:07:51,160
让我们上楼享受下成人之乐吧

190
00:07:51,160 --> 00:07:53,230
-得了吧老艾  -有啥不好的

191
00:07:53,230 --> 00:07:54,300
你这么漂亮

192
00:07:54,300 --> 00:07:55,510
我们俩又来电

193
00:07:55,510 --> 00:07:56,460
又是邻居

194
00:07:56,460 --> 00:07:59,440
办完事  回家走不了几步

195
00:08:02,800 --> 00:08:03,880
老艾  虽然事实如此

196
00:08:03,880 --> 00:08:06,760
但我不会和你上床的

197
00:08:06,760 --> 00:08:07,890
为什么捏

198
00:08:07,890 --> 00:08:09,420
很有劲的呀

199
00:08:10,290 --> 00:08:11,390
我们还能角色扮演

200
00:08:11,390 --> 00:08:13,780
我们扮厄文和丁丁

201
00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:17,380
我可以让你当厄文

202
00:08:18,470 --> 00:08:20,660
我不是那种随便的女人

203
00:08:20,660 --> 00:08:22,080
你不是吧

204
00:08:22,080 --> 00:08:25,070
我也想要被追求

205
00:08:25,070 --> 00:08:26,930
我结过三次婚了

206
00:08:26,930 --> 00:08:28,400
每次都搞到法院去

207
00:08:26,930 --> 00:08:28,400
court  有法院和求爱的意思

208
00:08:28,400 --> 00:08:30,430
我受够法院了

209
00:08:31,540 --> 00:08:33,300
我相信浪漫

210
00:08:33,300 --> 00:08:35,320
我懂你说的了

211
00:08:35,320 --> 00:08:37,480
你可以演丁丁

212
00:08:37,480 --> 00:08:39,340
老艾  我不会为了

213
00:08:39,340 --> 00:08:41,060
几个小时的欢愉就和我几乎

214
00:08:41,060 --> 00:08:42,390
不了解的人上床的

215
00:08:42,390 --> 00:08:44,490
几个小时

216
00:08:44,490 --> 00:08:47,300
你搞完还打算看场电影吗

217
00:08:50,980 --> 00:08:54,410
被你说的还真"诱人"啊

218
00:08:54,410 --> 00:08:56,320
人生苦短啊

219
00:08:56,320 --> 00:08:59,120
我们要及时行乐啊

220
00:08:59,120 --> 00:09:01,440
罗斯玛丽

221
00:09:01,440 --> 00:09:03,680
老艾  对我来说  美好时光

222
00:09:03,680 --> 00:09:06,470
只有在双方互相关心的时候才会出现

223
00:09:06,470 --> 00:09:08,120
不然  一切皆浮云

224
00:09:08,120 --> 00:09:09,970
好吧  那我们折中

225
00:09:09,970 --> 00:09:13,540
我们先爱爱  事后再悔过怎么样

226
00:09:13,540 --> 00:09:15,620
这就是体现我们俩差别的

227
00:09:15,620 --> 00:09:16,980
最好的证明

228
00:09:16,980 --> 00:09:19,030
你就是那种为了尽早抵达目的地

229
00:09:19,030 --> 00:09:20,570
肆无忌惮地在街上

230
00:09:20,570 --> 00:09:23,240
开六十迈的人  而我却是低速驾驶

231
00:09:23,240 --> 00:09:25,030
享受旅途中过程的乐趣

232
00:09:25,030 --> 00:09:27,380
一直开着左转方向灯

233
00:09:27,380 --> 00:09:30,740
让它亮着一路  直到我女儿来指正我

234
00:09:32,180 --> 00:09:33,570
-我不会求你和我上床的  -那最好

235
00:09:33,570 --> 00:09:35,210
我会贿赂你

236
00:09:35,210 --> 00:09:37,500
额滴神啊  赶快把文件签了

237
00:09:37,500 --> 00:09:38,690
我们就能装减速带了

238
00:09:38,690 --> 00:09:40,620
我们不可能装减速带

239
00:09:40,620 --> 00:09:42,480
-我们投票通过了呀  -我否决了

240
00:09:42,480 --> 00:09:44,090
为什么  就是因为我不肯跟你上床

241
00:09:44,090 --> 00:09:44,990
胡说

242
00:09:45,150 --> 00:09:48,030
我之前否决时  没想到你会拒绝我

243
00:09:49,470 --> 00:09:51,590
瞧  这说明我是个多么高尚的人啊

244
00:09:51,590 --> 00:09:54,020
咱们上楼庆祝一番如何

245
00:09:54,020 --> 00:09:55,580
高尚个屁

246
00:09:55,580 --> 00:09:56,970
你就是个小人

247
00:09:56,970 --> 00:09:58,990
你还是上楼躺在凹处

248
00:09:58,990 --> 00:10:01,360
玩你自己的"丁丁"吧

249
00:10:07,430 --> 00:10:10,400
你这是干啥

250
00:10:10,400 --> 00:10:16,490
你的一堆灰不啦叽的内内...外外的衣服

251
00:10:17,720 --> 00:10:19,670
问你一个问题

252
00:10:19,670 --> 00:10:21,390
你是女人吧

253
00:10:21,390 --> 00:10:22,200
也许吧

254
00:10:22,200 --> 00:10:24,810
不然看妇科的钱可都算白瞎了

255
00:10:29,990 --> 00:10:31,170
想问什么  老艾

256
00:10:31,170 --> 00:10:35,590
你觉着罗斯玛丽为啥让我追求她

257
00:10:35,590 --> 00:10:39,780
老艾  说实话  我也不知道

258
00:10:40,770 --> 00:10:42,840
她一边说我如何吸引她

259
00:10:42,840 --> 00:10:45,270
一边拒绝我提出的上楼邀请

260
00:10:45,270 --> 00:10:47,180
真是太纠结了

261
00:10:47,180 --> 00:10:48,650
她想让你追求她

262
00:10:48,650 --> 00:10:50,780
她就是这么说滴

263
00:10:51,560 --> 00:10:53,260
一把年纪谁还搞追来追去这套啊

264
00:10:53,260 --> 00:10:55,880
-挺浪漫的嘛  -太傻帽了

265
00:10:55,880 --> 00:10:57,560
你不想要个浪漫的女人吗

266
00:10:57,560 --> 00:10:58,780
鬼才要

267
00:10:59,850 --> 00:11:01,660
那你觉得女人"体内"应该具备些什么呢

268
00:11:01,660 --> 00:11:03,700
-我啊  -恶

269
00:11:07,880 --> 00:11:09,050
说正经的  老艾

270
00:11:09,120 --> 00:11:11,340
具备哪些特质

271
00:11:11,440 --> 00:11:13,180
我不挑三拣四

272
00:11:13,180 --> 00:11:16,240
有俩条腿  一只好使的眼睛就行

273
00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:18,240
那只眼睛可有可无

274
00:11:19,390 --> 00:11:20,920
罗斯玛丽又怎么不行了

275
00:11:20,920 --> 00:11:22,200
她拒绝了我

276
00:11:22,200 --> 00:11:24,380
继续追呗  约她出去

277
00:11:24,380 --> 00:11:26,850
送些花  讨她欢心

278
00:11:26,850 --> 00:11:28,950
你可以从买套新衣裳打扮打扮做起

279
00:11:28,950 --> 00:11:30,300
我才不想追她

280
00:11:30,300 --> 00:11:31,340
为啥

281
00:11:31,340 --> 00:11:32,770
人家不想嘛

282
00:11:34,890 --> 00:11:36,470
-骗人  -不想

283
00:11:36,470 --> 00:11:40,000
-说实话  -我不想追她

284
00:11:41,040 --> 00:11:42,750
知道我咋想的吗

285
00:11:42,750 --> 00:11:45,000
你不敢动真情

286
00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:46,130
因为你的心中已经有她

287
00:11:46,130 --> 00:11:47,540
你担心要是你俩谈上了

288
00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:48,690
就会陷得太深

289
00:11:49,020 --> 00:11:50,580
而根据你以往的经验表明

290
00:11:50,610 --> 00:11:51,330
这会让你遍体鳞伤

291
00:11:51,330 --> 00:11:54,690
你害怕重蹈覆辙

292
00:11:56,030 --> 00:11:57,690
跟这八竿子打不着

293
00:11:58,840 --> 00:12:00,640
我不喜欢这女人

294
00:12:00,640 --> 00:12:04,870
我只是想为性爱游戏中的"丁丁"找个厄文

295
00:12:07,480 --> 00:12:09,270
老艾  你真不喜欢她吗

296
00:12:09,270 --> 00:12:10,270
自打我认识你以来

297
00:12:10,270 --> 00:12:12,330
这还是第一个你主动提起的女人

298
00:12:12,330 --> 00:12:14,060
尽管你后宫众多

299
00:12:14,060 --> 00:12:15,210
-多吗  -得  得

300
00:12:15,210 --> 00:12:16,260
打住  打住

301
00:12:16,260 --> 00:12:17,900
艾德  我想说的是

302
00:12:17,900 --> 00:12:20,730
如果她就是你生命中的一个过客

303
00:12:20,730 --> 00:12:23,940
我们还会有这番谈话吗

304
00:12:23,940 --> 00:12:25,890
你胡说些什么呢

305
00:12:25,890 --> 00:12:28,640
-少管闲事  -好

306
00:12:30,960 --> 00:12:33,260
该上哪买新衣裳

307
00:12:39,870 --> 00:12:41,020
咱离开这鬼地方吧

308
00:12:41,020 --> 00:12:42,760
老艾  思路放开阔点

309
00:12:42,760 --> 00:12:44,590
这家店很潮的

310
00:12:44,590 --> 00:12:47,690
一定有你中意的东西

311
00:12:47,690 --> 00:12:49,880
那玩意貌似很过瘾

312
00:12:49,880 --> 00:12:50,800
去吧  我看看

313
00:12:50,800 --> 00:12:52,130
这条裙子有没有我的码

314
00:12:52,130 --> 00:12:53,910
试试好玩

315
00:12:54,790 --> 00:12:57,230
大腿舞多少钱

316
00:12:59,190 --> 00:13:02,100
老艾  你...你这是干什么

317
00:13:02,100 --> 00:13:04,190
那是我中意的东西啊  脱衣舞女

318
00:13:04,190 --> 00:13:06,410
她不是脱衣舞女  是这的员工

319
00:13:06,410 --> 00:13:08,920
艾德  别对女人分门别类

320
00:13:08,920 --> 00:13:10,920
太三俗了

321
00:13:10,920 --> 00:13:12,860
喔  喔  站住

322
00:13:12,860 --> 00:13:14,760
二  四  六  八

323
00:13:14,760 --> 00:13:16,980
哇  一块都不少

324
00:13:18,230 --> 00:13:20,160
喔  喔  喔

325
00:13:20,160 --> 00:13:20,820
能为您效劳吗

326
00:13:20,820 --> 00:13:22,400
我想买男士服装

327
00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:25,820
可看你穿的这磕碜样  估计没戏了

328
00:13:27,090 --> 00:13:29,030
就从裤子开始吧

329
00:13:29,030 --> 00:13:32,890
也许应该找条...不这么老土的裤子

330
00:13:32,890 --> 00:13:38,240
像这种酷酷的怎么样

331
00:13:38,240 --> 00:13:40,900
就这破旧的裤子还要100刀

332
00:13:40,900 --> 00:13:44,580
不是破旧  是做旧

333
00:13:44,580 --> 00:13:46,100
做旧的衣服价更高

334
00:13:46,100 --> 00:13:49,430
如此说来  我的小内该值80刀了

335
00:13:50,360 --> 00:13:53,230
还是你俩自己敲定吧

336
00:13:53,230 --> 00:13:54,630
艾德  你是哪根筋错了啊

337
00:13:54,630 --> 00:13:55,690
你不是要我来帮你的嘛

338
00:13:55,690 --> 00:13:58,930
我为毛要打扮成一个无家可归的基佬

339
00:13:58,930 --> 00:14:01,070
就是为了证明我对这女人的喜爱吗

340
00:14:01,070 --> 00:14:02,770
如果她不喜欢我的为人

341
00:14:02,770 --> 00:14:04,380
她也就不值得我去爱

342
00:14:04,380 --> 00:14:07,310
老艾  想想看  要是她真喜欢你的为人

343
00:14:07,310 --> 00:14:10,000
你还会相信她的判断吗

344
00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:11,600
说得好

345
00:14:13,800 --> 00:14:14,800
对头

346
00:14:15,740 --> 00:14:17,350
就是这样

347
00:14:18,470 --> 00:14:19,940
这可不是小胡子

348
00:14:19,940 --> 00:14:21,280
就是被闪电劈中的柔毛

349
00:14:21,280 --> 00:14:24,340
相信哥  我跟你邦姐一直在讨论这问题

350
00:14:26,400 --> 00:14:29,180
靠  我现在可吃不起罚单

351
00:14:29,180 --> 00:14:31,360
没事  淡定  淡定

352
00:14:31,360 --> 00:14:33,950
我朋友克丽丝总能逃过罚单

353
00:14:33,950 --> 00:14:36,680
-太棒了  怎么弄  -抹眼泪  露咪咪

354
00:14:38,240 --> 00:14:40,660
关键时刻衬衫却塞得老紧

355
00:14:41,430 --> 00:14:42,710
你刚闯过了一个停车标志

356
00:14:42,710 --> 00:14:43,890
请出示驾照和行驶证

357
00:14:43,890 --> 00:14:45,060
抱歉警官  我刚刚在和我弟弟

358
00:14:45,060 --> 00:14:46,990
-说话  -这么说吧

359
00:14:46,990 --> 00:14:49,490
算了  这些标示有的时候是比较难发现

360
00:14:49,490 --> 00:14:51,180
下次注意点

361
00:14:51,180 --> 00:14:54,900
谢谢您  警官

362
00:14:54,900 --> 00:14:56,940
胡子挺帅的

363
00:14:58,250 --> 00:15:00,670
拍一个

364
00:15:00,670 --> 00:15:01,800
你没系安全带

365
00:15:01,800 --> 00:15:03,960
罚款50美元

366
00:15:11,490 --> 00:15:13,760
-派对不错啊  -老艾

367
00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:14,960
你来干什么

368
00:15:14,960 --> 00:15:17,620
斯特宾船长：美国著名剧集《爱之船》男主角

369
00:15:14,960 --> 00:15:17,620
还把自己打扮的和斯特宾船长一样

370
00:15:18,630 --> 00:15:20,620
我这不是追求你嘛

371
00:15:20,620 --> 00:15:22,190
你以为你打扮成海军小伙耍耍酷

372
00:15:22,190 --> 00:15:25,370
就能赢得我的芳心吗

373
00:15:25,370 --> 00:15:27,250
行么

374
00:15:27,250 --> 00:15:29,210
有点行

375
00:15:29,210 --> 00:15:30,510
继续

376
00:15:30,510 --> 00:15:35,030
我儿媳妇说  要是你在乎一个人

377
00:15:35,030 --> 00:15:36,640
你就要做出努力

378
00:15:36,640 --> 00:15:39,450
所以她带我去了一家时装店

379
00:15:39,450 --> 00:15:43,240
想给我买一些

380
00:15:43,240 --> 00:15:46,360
20多岁的小混混穿的那种

381
00:15:46,360 --> 00:15:47,970
洋相十足的衣服

382
00:15:47,970 --> 00:15:49,880
你好  罗斯玛丽

383
00:15:57,250 --> 00:15:59,140
嫉妒么

384
00:16:02,990 --> 00:16:04,030
不管怎么说吧

385
00:16:05,030 --> 00:16:07,370
如果你对我有意思

386
00:16:07,370 --> 00:16:09,810
我可以和你慢慢来

387
00:16:09,810 --> 00:16:11,360
你认真的

388
00:16:11,360 --> 00:16:15,350
以军官和老爷们的荣誉发誓

389
00:16:16,320 --> 00:16:17,520
我真是备受感动啊

390
00:16:17,520 --> 00:16:19,700
我得说这是个惊喜

391
00:16:19,700 --> 00:16:21,630
事实上  我今晚确实给你

392
00:16:21,630 --> 00:16:23,870
准备了一个惊喜

393
00:16:23,870 --> 00:16:25,830
-是什么  -相信我

394
00:16:25,830 --> 00:16:29,320
你会喜欢的  你想喝什么

395
00:16:29,320 --> 00:16:31,320
我应该不会拒绝一杯夏敦埃

396
00:16:31,320 --> 00:16:33,870
除非它想睡你

397
00:16:40,280 --> 00:16:44,610
罗斯玛丽  能  能请你跳支舞么

398
00:16:45,380 --> 00:16:47,380
没有音乐啊  马文

399
00:16:51,090 --> 00:16:53,700
我真恨我自己

400
00:16:56,560 --> 00:16:57,940
我在等老艾

401
00:16:57,940 --> 00:17:00,570
他有个惊喜给我

402
00:17:00,570 --> 00:17:02,180
天呢  那太致命了

403
00:17:02,180 --> 00:17:03,790
-怎么了  -我不能说

404
00:17:03,790 --> 00:17:05,950
男人的秘密

405
00:17:05,950 --> 00:17:07,440
他说他要睡你

406
00:17:07,440 --> 00:17:09,390
-他说了么  -没有

407
00:17:09,390 --> 00:17:12,060
他说他要搞定你

408
00:17:12,060 --> 00:17:12,980
这是他的原话

409
00:17:12,980 --> 00:17:14,310
我说的够多了

410
00:17:14,310 --> 00:17:16,610
狠狠的搞定你  罗斯玛丽

411
00:17:17,530 --> 00:17:19,430
他来了  记住  他要搞定你这个事

412
00:17:19,430 --> 00:17:21,960
不是我说的

413
00:17:21,960 --> 00:17:23,610
一杯夏敦埃

414
00:17:25,910 --> 00:17:27,790
来  咱们慢慢来

415
00:17:27,790 --> 00:17:29,810
惊喜到底是什么

416
00:17:29,810 --> 00:17:31,730
告诉你了还叫惊喜啊

417
00:17:31,730 --> 00:17:34,000
这么说吧  为了看到惊喜

418
00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:36,150
今晚你得跟我开车回家

419
00:17:39,420 --> 00:17:41,300
我给自己也准备了一点惊喜

420
00:17:41,300 --> 00:17:43,520
我再也不想跟你说话了

421
00:17:43,520 --> 00:17:46,120
-什么  -永别了  老艾

422
00:17:54,520 --> 00:17:55,650
肯定的

423
00:17:55,650 --> 00:17:58,080
他肯定是想把我骗到他家里

424
00:17:58,080 --> 00:18:00,590
号称是有惊喜给我

425
00:18:01,760 --> 00:18:05,010
唯一的惊喜就是自己上当受骗

426
00:18:05,940 --> 00:18:07,810
太蠢了

427
00:18:10,290 --> 00:18:12,180
你认为我蠢么

428
00:18:12,180 --> 00:18:16,940
女士  此项服务只针对道路指示和紧急事件

429
00:18:19,780 --> 00:18:21,650
这就是紧急事件

430
00:18:21,650 --> 00:18:24,370
我邻居就是个彻头彻尾的混蛋

431
00:18:26,920 --> 00:18:28,340
我勒个去

432
00:18:28,340 --> 00:18:30,660
您没事吧  发生了什么

433
00:18:30,660 --> 00:18:33,300
这就是惊喜

434
00:18:33,300 --> 00:18:35,870
他放了减速带

435
00:18:44,860 --> 00:18:46,920
该死的  太失败了

436
00:18:46,920 --> 00:18:48,010
发生了什么

437
00:18:48,010 --> 00:18:50,930
都这么多年了  我还是没把女人的心思整明白

438
00:18:50,930 --> 00:18:52,820
我觉得对待她们最好的方式

439
00:18:52,820 --> 00:18:55,000
就是像在感恩节时对待红莓果酱那样

440
00:18:56,490 --> 00:18:59,790
筷一勺  然后赶紧递给下一个家伙

441
00:19:02,080 --> 00:19:04,740
老艾  代表全世界女性我必须果断说一句

442
00:19:04,740 --> 00:19:06,340
恶心

443
00:19:07,470 --> 00:19:10,150
事实是  我确实喜欢她

444
00:19:10,150 --> 00:19:14,020
这就是我不愿跟女人追来追去的原因

445
00:19:26,890 --> 00:19:28,160
怎么个情况

446
00:19:28,160 --> 00:19:30,640
装了减速带  我开过去了

447
00:19:30,640 --> 00:19:31,880
然后我就一脸奶昔

448
00:19:31,880 --> 00:19:33,870
我知道啊  我亲自检查的

449
00:19:33,870 --> 00:19:35,720
我还是可以开着我的黑斑羚

450
00:19:35,720 --> 00:19:37,180
45迈不减速直接冲过去

451
00:19:39,420 --> 00:19:40,800
如果你还有意向  我还是很希望

452
00:19:40,800 --> 00:19:42,410
你能继续向我献殷勤

453
00:19:42,410 --> 00:19:44,250
求之不得

454
00:19:44,250 --> 00:19:45,300
好的

455
00:19:45,300 --> 00:19:47,840
我要回家换衣服去

456
00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:50,020
然后你就可以开始献了

457
00:19:54,620 --> 00:19:55,940
祝贺你  老艾

458
00:19:55,940 --> 00:19:57,630
你搞定了

459
00:19:57,630 --> 00:20:00,730
能尊重点么  这可是我追求的女人

460
00:20:13,780 --> 00:20:16,680
你真像你妈

461
00:20:21,130 --> 00:20:23,170
亨利  快点  时间到了

462
00:20:25,910 --> 00:20:29,390
昨晚刚长出来

463
00:20:30,400 --> 00:20:32,390
看上去还比较稀疏

464
00:20:32,390 --> 00:20:34,240
快点吧  让我们看看

465
00:20:34,240 --> 00:20:35,450
好吧

466
00:20:35,450 --> 00:20:37,230
来了

467
00:20:45,800 --> 00:20:49,840
现在  老爸  谁赢了

468
00:20:59,140 --> 00:21:00,850
你怎么知道这是假的

469
00:21:00,850 --> 00:21:02,980
我不知道