you know I've heard a lot of experts say
that fear isn't real that is such a
bunch of baloney fear is so real in fact
there are probably things that you're
afraid of doing right now in your life
in your relationships and work and the
fact that you're afraid that's robbing
you of all of the experiences that you
want to have in your life I mean if
you're afraid to fly that's going to
limit your ability to travel and see the
world or go visit friends if you're
afraid of public speaking that's going
to really limit your ability to express
yourself and share your ideas if if
you're afraid of talking to your boss or
asking for a raise that directly impacts
how much money you make or what if you
are dreaming of starting a business or
you've already started a new business
but you're afraid to talk to people and
you're afraid to share your business
with people I mean fear is something
that stops us all and that's why I'm
here to talk to you because it doesn't
have to fear is real but I am going to
share a secret weapon that I have used
for years to beat every single fear that
used to stop me now first before we get
into this secret weapon I just want to
cover a few facts about fear What It Is
What It Isn't and some things that you
may may not know about fear so first
thing fear is a physical state in your
body that is exactly the same as
excitement let me say that again fear
and excitement are the exact same
physical state your heart races you
might sweat a little bit you might feel
tightening in your chest you might feel
a pit in your stomach uh you have a
surge of cortisol it's basically the way
that your body goes into a hyperaware
State because it's readying for Action
Now what's the difference between fear
and excitement really simple the only
difference between fear and excitement
is what your brain is doing as your body
is all agitated if you're excited your
brain's going oh wow this is going to be
so cool to ride this roller coaster if
you're afraid your brain's going oh no
way there's no way I'm doing that this
is dangerous get out of there don't do
that it's saying something different so
what's critical about understanding this
is that we're going to use the fact that
your mind is either working for you for
excitement or against you with fear to
your advantage and I'll tell you about
it in just a minute how you're going to
do that second thing I want you to
understand is that you may have heard
the advice Feel the fear and do it
anyway you may have heard the advice oh
just try to calm down think positive
thoughts
it doesn't work does it and there's a
reason why it doesn't work so let's go
back to fact number one when you're
afraid your body is in a state of
arousal and agitation and your heart is
racing and you're all like amped up and
you're hyper aware of what's going on
and you're freaking out a little bit
what is it like when you're
calm you just kind of chill right you
got like this low arousal State very
very difficult to go from a state of
agitation of being all jacked up and
excited and weirded out and to
a kind of state it doesn't work it's
like trying to stop a train by throwing
a boulder on the tracks it's going to
make the train jump off the tracks it's
going to cause a disaster in fact
they've proven in research that when you
try to ignore your fears it actually
makes them worse and they've also proven
in research that positive thinking alone
also can make your fears wor worse so
what do you do what do do you do when
you're about to go talk to your boss and
you feel afraid what do you do when you
have to get on a plane and you're
actually terrified of flying what do you
do if you got to give a presentation and
you are afraid of public speaking here's
what you're going to do you're going to
use a strategy the same one that I use
that has helped me beat every single
fear and turned me into somebody that is
terrific when it comes to a high stress
situation this is how you do it you're
going to use my 5-second rule in
combination with what I call an anchor
thought and that is going to
reframe what your mind is doing so that
your mind goes from feeling agitation
and making you afraid to reframing it
from agitation to excitement it works
like magic now I have used this
technique for years literally for years
and one of the ways that I want to
introduce you to it is I want to take
you backstage I want to take you back
stage to a speech that I delivered this
year and what you're going to see is
you're going to see me behind you know
the major set I'm about to walk out you
can kind of hear the crowd roaring my
introductory video is playing my body is
in a state of arousal I am literally my
heart is racing my arms are sweating
like it's like you're going to see this
I'm going to tell you about it and
you're going to watch me use this same
technique I'm going to teach you to
reframe my nerves into excitement check
this out all right I'm about to go on
stage there are 7,000 people out there
and it's so exciting because what they
don't know is they're about to learn the
5-second rule and their lives will never
be the same again now I got to tell you
my heart is racing um my armpits are
sweating I have the exact same
physiological feeling as when I'm afraid
but I'm not afraid I'm excited
excitement and fear is the exact same
thing in your body it's just what your
brain calls it here's a trick that's
proven by science that I use every time
I speak when I start to sweat when I
start to have butterflies when I start
to have my heart race I say I'm excited
I'm excited to get out there I'm excited
to talk to these people I'm excited to
share the 5-sec rule and what that does
is it sends a message to my brain that
tells my brain why my body's all
agitated and excited and that way I
don't feel afraid remember excitement
and fear exact same thing in your body
the only difference is what your brain
calls it that's why you want those go
get now I want to give you one more
example just to make sure that you
really get how you can use this so a lot
of you have written to me about your
fear of flying and I can really relate
to that fear because I used to have the
exact same fear but I use this same
strategy to conquer it here's how you're
going to do it so first things first if
you've got to do something that really
makes you nervous or that you're afraid
to do before you're about to do it come
up with an anchor thought what's an
anchor thought well an anchor thought is
something that's going to Anchor you so
that you don't escalate any situation
into a full-blown panic attack or into a
situation where you screw things up it's
a way for you to Anchor yourself so you
maintain control over what you're
thinking and how you behave so here's an
example with flying it's important when
you're creating an anchor thought to
pick something that is in the proper
context of what you're afraid to do so
for flying pick an anchor thought that
has to do with the trip that you're
taking so if I'm boarding a plane to fly
back home to Michigan an anchor thought
might be a picture in my mind of my mom
and I walking on the shores of Lake
Michigan where I grew up that's a
thought that makes me happy it makes me
excited and it's also related to the
trip that I'm taking if you have a
conversation that you need to have with
your boss pick an anchor thought about
how you feel after having that
conversation maybe it's you picking up
the phone and calling somebody that you
you love and saying oh my gosh it went
so well or you know you walking out of
the meeting and feeling like yeah I
survived that conversation I feel pretty
good about myself so now that you have
your anchor thought you're ready to beat
the
fear how you're going to do it is this
so let's go back back to the example of
the plane I'm on the plane I'm flying to
Michigan we hit
turbulence my body's going to start
getting agitated right I'm starting to
get nervous my heart starts to race one
of two things can happen I can't control
how my body might feel but I can always
always control what I'm thinking about
and I can always control how I act and
so can you so when I'm on a plane and
the turbulence hits 5 43 2 1 that's step
one and it's essential and the reason
why using the 5c Rule 5 4 3 2 1 is
essential is because that is how you
switch the gears in your mind you awaken
your prefrontal cortex and you trigger
your brain that you're now in control of
your thoughts you've interrupted the
fear you've settled your thoughts and
now your brain is ready for that anchor
thought so then what I do after I go 54
3 2 1 is I insert the anchor thought
that I've already come up with before
the flight I start thinking about
walking on the beach and being with my
mom and my dad and I start telling
myself I'm so excited to walk on the
shores of Lake Michigan I'm so excited
to see my parents now something
remarkable is going to happen in your
brain because you've interrupted the
fear and because you've used the
5-second rule to assert control and
awaken your prefrontal cortex and
because you have an image that
contextually makes sense to your brain
because you're flying to Michigan you
know your brain does your brain goes
huh Mel's excited to go to Michigan
because my body is in a state remember
the first fact fear and excitement exact
same thing what's the difference between
fear and excitement what your brain is
saying using the 5-second rule and an
anchor thought you can actually switch
the gears in your mind and reframe the
thoughts of fear into thoughts of
excitement and because you have a vision
that makes sense based on what you're
doing your brain buys it you just
tricked your brain now Dana used this
technique she says she's never been so
calm when she's been flying and Sarah
used it too now Sarah wrote to she was
petrified of flying but utilizing the
5-sec rule and 54321 with an anchor
thought check out this photo of her on a
helicopter tour in Hawaii Not only was
the tour amazing but here's what's
really amazing if fear stops
you this will change your life and for
those of you that are afraid of public
speaking check out this photo of Carol
she also had a fear of public speaking
and by using this technique that I've
just explained to you 5-sec rule anchor
thought reframe your thoughts from Fear
to excitement something incredible
happened she was able to beat her fear
and give a speech to her nursing
colleagues and that was something that
was a life goal and also something she
checked off her bucket list
fear is real you can't control the
feelings that are going to rise up in
your body when you're on a plane or when
you're talking to your boss or when you
see somebody that's attractive and you
you really want to go over and and talk
to that person but you can always
control what you think and you can
always make a decision about the actions
you're going to take so the next time
you feel afraid
54321 go to to that anchor thought tell
yourself you're excited and that my
friend is the power of how you beat fear
in 5 seconds flat and don't forget I'm
here to help you however I can make sure
you celebrate your successes on social
media using the #5c rule tag me and if
you ever have a question or you need
advice you can always reach us at hello
melrobbins.com