片名：《安妮.霍尔》
有个老笑话是这样说的 There's an old joke.
有两位老妇人去卡茨基尔山旅游 Two elderly women are at a Catskill mountain resort.
其中一个说："哎，这地方的食物可真够糟的！" One says, "The food at this place is really terrible. "
另一个说： "可不是嘛，给的份量又那么少" The other says, "I know, and such small portions. "
你瞧，我对生活的看法基本上也是如此 That's essentially how I feel about life:
尽管充满了寂寞、痛苦、悲惨和不幸 full of loneliness, misery, suffering and unhappiness
但又觉得一切都逝去得太快 and it's all over much too quickly.
另一个对我来说比较重要的笑话出自于 The other important joke for me...
格劳乔·马克斯(美国谐星) 一般是这样认为的 is one usually attributed to Groucho Marx
但是我想它最初来自于弗洛伊德的 《智慧以及它与无意识的关系》 but it appears originally in Freud's Wit and Its Relation to the Unconscious.
是这样的，我来简要复述一下 It goes like this, I'm paraphrasing:
我永远也不想加入这样的俱乐部 它的会员是像我这样的人 I never want to belong to any club that would have someone like me for a member.
这是我成年生活的关键笑话 它说明了我和女人之间的关系 That's the key joke of my adult life in terms of my relationships with women.
你知道，近来我头脑里总有些 奇怪的念头挥之不去 Lately the strangest things have been going through my mind
因为我刚过四十，我想我正经历我一生中的 一个危机，诸如此类的事，我不知道 because I turned 40, and I guess I'm going through a life crisis.
我并不担心变老 我不是那样的人，你知道 I'm not worried about aging. I'm not one of those characters.
当然，我头顶的头发开始变得稀疏 那可能是你可以看到的我最糟糕的方面了 But I'm balding slightly on top. That's about the worst you can say about me.
我想我是年纪越大状态越佳，你知道 I think I'm going to get better as I get older.
我想我会成为头上光光 阳刚十足的的那种类型，你知道 I think I'm going to be the balding, virile type
而不是，譬如说 满头银发、有款有型的那种 as opposed to the distinguished gray.
也有可能我两种都不是 Unless I'm neither of those two.
弄不好我会变成那样一种人 嘴角哩哩啦啦流着哈喇子 Unless I'm one of those guys with saliva dribbling out of his mouth
手里拎着购物袋，颤颤巍巍走进自助餐馆 口中高呼着社会主义 who wanders into a cafeteria with a shopping bag, screaming about socialism.
安妮和我分手了 对此我仍然耿耿于怀 Annie and I broke up, and I still can't get my mind around that.
我一直想梳理出点头绪 在心里拾掇着我们之间关系的点点滴滴 I keep sifting the pieces of the relationship through my mind
检讨着自己的生活 试图弄明白究竟哪儿搞糟了，你知道 examining my life and trying to figure out where did the screwup come.
一年以前，我们还相爱着，你知道 A year ago we were in love.
有点滑稽，我不是个抑郁的人 我的性格也不乖僻 It's funny. I'm not a morose type. I'm not a depressive character.
你知道，我以前是个 相当快乐的孩子，我想是的 I was a reasonably happy kid.
我在布鲁克林长大，那是二战期间 I was brought up in Brooklyn during World War ll.
他最近情绪很低落 He's been depressed.
突如其来地，他不想做任何事情 - 你为什么会情绪低落呢，艾尔维? Suddenly he can't do anything. - Why are you depressed, Alvy?
快告诉弗利克医生 可能是他读了什么东西了 Tell Dr. Flicker. It's something he read.
读了什么东西，呃? Something he read, huh?
宇宙正在膨胀 - 宇宙正在膨胀? The universe is expanding. - The universe is expanding?
宇宙代表世间万物 如果它正在膨胀 The universe is everything, and if it's expanding...
那么总有一天，它会四分五裂 那就会是世界末日 someday it will break apart, and that will be the end of everything.
那和你有什么关系? 他不再做作业了！ What is that your business? He stopped doing his homework!
还有什么做头? - 宇宙和作业有什么关系啊? What's the point? - What's the universe got to do with it?
你现在在布鲁克林 布鲁克林没有膨胀！ You're here in Brooklyn. Brooklyn is not expanding!
再过亿万年它都不会膨胀啊！艾尔维 It won't be expanding for billions of years!
我们应该乘着我们还在这儿 尽情享受生活才对！啊，啊，哈哈… We've got to try and enjoy ourselves while we're here! Huh?
我的心理医生说我夸大了我童年的记忆 My analyst says I exaggerate my childhood memories...
但是我可以告诉你 我是在过山车下长大的 but I swear I was brought up underneath the roller coaster
它位于布鲁克林的科尼岛那一块 in the Coney Island section of Brooklyn.
或许这造成了我的性格 就是有点神经质，我想 Maybe that accounts for my personality, which is a little nervous.
你知道，我有极度亢进的想象力 我的心思总是跳来跳去 I have a hyperactive imagination. My mind tends to jump around a little.
有时会分不清幻想和现实的界限 I have some trouble between fantasy and reality.
我父亲经营着一家碰碰车游乐场 My father ran the bumper-car concession.
那个就是他，我在这儿 There he is, and there I am.
我经常利用碰碰车来发泄我的进攻性 I used to get my aggression out through those cars.
我也记得我们公立学校的那些老师 I remember the staff at our public school.
你知道有这样的说法 那些干不了啥事的，就去教书 We had a saying, "Those who can't do, teach...
那些教不了啥书的，就去教体育 and those who can't teach, teach gym. "
当然，那些啥事都干不了的，我想 都被派到我们学校来了 And those who couldn't do anything, I think, were assigned to our school.
我得承认，我一直认为 我的同学都是些白痴 I must say, I always thought my schoolmates were idiots.
梅尔文·格林哥拉斯 你知道，长着张肥肥的小脸 Melvyn Greenglass and his fat little face.
亨丽埃塔·法雷尔 总是一副"完美小姐"的腔调 And Henrietta Farrell, Miss Perfect all the time.
还有伊凡·艾克曼 从来没答对过任何问题，从来没有过！ And Ivan Ackerman, always the wrong answer. Always!
七加三等于九 Seven and three is nine.
那时我就知道他们都是些混球 Even then I knew they were just jerks.
早在1942年，我就开始对女性发生兴趣 In 1942 I had already discovered women.
他吻了我！他吻了我！ He kissed me!
这已经是这个月的第二次了！ 站到这里来！ That's the second time this month! Step up here.
我做错什么了? - 快站过来！ What did I do? - Step up here.
我做错什么了? - 你应该为自己的行为感到羞耻 What did I do? - You should be ashamed of yourself.
为什么啊?我只不过表达了一种 健康的异性好奇而已 Why? I was just expressing a healthy sexual curiosity.
六岁的男孩不会对女孩产生好奇 Six-year-old boys don't have girls on their minds.
我会啊 I did.
拜托，艾尔维 即使弗洛伊德都说有性潜伏期！ For God sakes, Alvy, even Freud speaks of a latency period!
可我从没有过性潜伏期 我情不自禁嘛 I never had a latency period. I can't help it.
你就不能向唐纳德好好学学吗? Why couldn't you have been more like Donald?
这孩子是我们的好典型 There was a model boy.
快告诉大伙你现在干啥，唐纳德 Tell the folks where you are today, Donald.
我开了家挺挣钱的服装公司 I run a profitable dress company.
我经常想知道我同学如今都混得怎样了 Sometimes I wonder where my classmates are today.
我是"平克斯水暖设备公司"总裁 I'm president of the Pinkus Plumbing Company.
我推销(犹太人用的)披巾 I sell talliths.
以前我吸食海洛因 现在我离不开美沙酮了 I used to be a heroin addict, now I'm a methadone addict.
我经营皮货 I'm into leather.
大部分老同学我都失去了联系 反正我成了喜剧演员 I lost track of most of my old schoolmates, but I wound up a comedian.
他们不让我入伍 They did not take me in the army.
绝的是，我有四个加(?) I was 4-P.
是的，如果发生战争，我只能变成人质 In the event of war, I'm a hostage.
你总是把人往最坏处想 You always only saw the worst in people.
你在学校里和任何人都处不好 You never could get along with anyone in school.
你总是和这个世界格格不入 You were always out of step with the world.
即使你已经出名了 你仍然不信任这个世界 Even when you got famous, you still distrusted the world.
我听得清清楚楚 他压低嗓门嘟囔着："犹太佬" I distinctly heard it. He muttered under his breath, "Jew. "
你真疯了 - 没有，我没疯 You're crazy. - No, I'm not.
我们正往网球场外走 他和我，还有他妻子 We were walking off the tennis court. He was there and me and his wife.
他看了她一眼，然后他们俩一起看着我 He looked her, then they both looked at me
他压低嗓门说："犹太佬" and under his breath he said, "Jew. "
艾尔维，你是个十足的偏执狂 You're a total paranoid.
我哪儿偏执啦? 我对这类事情是很敏感的 How am I a paranoid? I pick up on those kind of things.
你知道，有一次我想和全国广播公司的家伙 一起吃中饭，于是我问道:"你吃了吗?" I was having lunch with guys from NBC, so I said, "Did you eat yet?"
汤姆·克里斯蒂说："没有，犹太佬(你呢)?" 他不说"你呢?" Tom Christie said, "No. Jew?" Not "Did you?"
他没说"你吃了吗?" 他说"犹太佬吃了?"你明白吗? Not "Did you eat?" but "Jew eat?" You get it?
麦克斯… - 别叫我麦克斯 Max - Stop calling me Max.
为什么? 这个名字很适合你 麦克斯，你看什么都像有阴谋 Why? It's a good name for you. Max, you see conspiracies in everything.
不，我没有，你知道有一次我在一家唱片店 我跟你说 No, I don't. I was in a record store. Listen to this.
有个高高壮壮的、金发剪得短短的家伙 他用一种奇怪的表情看着我 There's this tall, blond crew-cutted guy and he's looking at me in a funny way.
并冲着我笑着说："对，这个星期 瓦(发德音V)格纳的音乐减价销售" He's saying, "Yes, we have a sale this week on Wagner. "
瓦格纳，麦克斯，瓦格纳 我知道他到底想说什么 Wagner, Max. I know what he's trying to tell me.
再明显不过了，瓦格纳 Very significantly, Wagner.
行了，麦克斯 去加利福尼亚吧，麦克斯 Right, Max. California, Max.
离开这疯狂的鬼城市 - 想都别想 Get the hell out of this crazy city. - Forget it.
我们搬到阳光灿烂的洛杉矶去 所有的娱乐业都在那儿，麦克斯 We move to sunny L.A. All of show business is out there.
不，我不愿意，你老是跟我提这个 我可不想住在那样一个城市 You keep bringing it up, but I don't want to live in a city...
在那儿唯一的文化上的优势就是 你遇上红灯时可以右转 where the only cultural advantage is you can make a right turn on a red light.
好吧，麦克斯，算了 你和安妮的约会要迟到了吧? All right, forget it. Aren't you going to be late for meeting Annie?
我和她在"比克曼剧院"门口见 我想我还有几分钟，对吗? I'm meeting her in front of the Beekman. I have a few minutes left, right?
你上过电视，对吧? Are you on television?
没有
是的，偶尔吧，个把次 Yeah, occasionally.
你叫什么名字? What's your name?
你没必要知道，没什么大不了的 You wouldn't know it. It doesn't matter.
你上过强尼·卡森的节目，对吗? You're on Johnny Carson, right?
有几次吧，你知道，每… Once in a while.
你叫什么名字? What's your name?
我是罗伯特·雷德福 - 别逗了！ I'm Robert Redford. - Come on!
我是艾尔维·辛格 很高兴认识你，非常感谢 Alvy Singer. Thanks very much for everything.
这是艾尔维·辛格！ This is Alvy Singer!
伙计，你这是…天哪！
这家伙上过电视 叫艾尔维·辛格对吧?我没弄错吧? This guy's on television. Alvy Singer, right? Am I right?
饶了我吧，天哪 - 这家伙上过电视 Give me a break. - This guy's on television.
我真想找根大号的马球拐棒 I need the large polo mallet.
谁上过电视? - 这家伙，上过强尼·卡森的节目 Who's on television? - This guy, on the Johnny Carson Show.
- 伙计，怎么了嘛，想搞卡车司机 聚会还是怎么着? - 什么节目? - Is this a meeting of the teamsters? - What program?
能给我签个名吗? - 你不会要我签名的 Can I have your autograph? - You don't want my autograph.
不，我想要！给我女朋友的 I do! It's for my girlfriend.
写上给拉尔夫的 Make it out to Ralph.
你女朋友叫拉尔夫? - 那是给我弟弟的 Your girlfriend's name is Ralph? - It's for my brother.
你真是艾尔维·辛格，那个电视明星? You're really Alvy Singer, the TV star?
艾尔维·辛格在这儿！ - 行了，行了，幽着点，伙计 Alvy Singer over here! - It's all right, fellas.
天哪，你干什么去了? 绕过巴拿马运河才来? Jesus, what did you do? Come by way of the Panama Canal?
我情绪不好，行了吧， - 我站在这儿碰到《教父》的演员了 I'm in a bad mood. - I'm here with the Godfather cast.
你应该学着怎样应付这种事 - 我正应付两个名叫"奇曲(纽约黑手党)"的家伙呢 Learn to deal with it. - I'm dealing with two guys named Cheech.
拜托，我头很疼，行了吧 Please, I have a headache.
你是情绪不好 肯定又来例假了吧 You are in a bad mood. You must be getting your period.
我没来例假！天哪！ I'm not getting my period! Jesus!
每次稍有点不对劲 你都说我来例假了 Every time anything out of the ordinary happens, you think I have my period.
你还可以再喊响点 我想那边有一位没听到你说的 A little louder. I think one of them may have missed it.
电影开场了吗? 两分钟之前开始的 Has the picture started? - Two minutes ago.
得，别看了，我不想进去了 That's it. Forget it. I can't go in.
才两分钟 - 抱歉，我不想看了 Two minutes. - We've blown it already.
你知道，我不想放到一半了再入场 I can't go in, in the middle.
放到一半?我们只错过了片头字幕 而且还是瑞典语的 In the middle? We've only missed the titles. They're in Swedish.
你想我们去喝两个小时的咖啡呢 还是怎样? You want to get coffee for two hours?
两个小时?不，我要进去 - 那你去吧，再见 Two hours? No. I'm going in. - Go ahead. Good-bye.
要是我们不说那么多话 我们早就可以在里面了，你知道吗? While we're talking, we could be inside.
咳，我们能不能不站在这儿当众争吵? 我感到很难堪 Can we not argue in front of everybody? I get embarrassed.
好吧，好吧，那你想干什么? - 我不知道，你想换一部电影看吗? All right. So what do you want to do? - I don't know. Go to another movie?
我们去看《悲伤和怜悯》吧 - 算了吧，我们已经看过了 Let's see The Sorrow and the Pity. - We've seen it.
我现在可没心情看一部四小时长的 有关纳粹的纪录片 I'm not in the mood to see a four hour documentary on Nazis.
抱歉，我不能… I'm sorry.
我看电影必须是严格地从头到尾 因为我是"屁眼"(紧张刻板、注重细节) I've got to see a picture exactly from start to finish, 'cause I'm anal.
哈哈，这个词用在你身上还真不过分 That's a polite word for what you are.
我们上周二看了部费里尼的片子 不算他最好的作品 We saw the Fellini film last Tuesday. It is not one of his best.
因为它的结构缺少一种内聚力 It lacks a cohesive structure.
给你的感觉是他自己也不确定 到底想要表达什么 You get the feeling he's not absolutely sure what it is he wants to say.
因为我一直认为他本质上只是一位 注重技巧的电影人 I've always felt he was essentially a technical filmmaker.
当然《大路》是一部伟大的电影 Granted La Strada was a great film.
之所以伟大是因为它将负面的意象用到了极致，但是，那简单的凝聚内核 Great in its use of negative imagery more than anything else.
受不了这家伙，我要晕过去了 - 不听他的就是了 I'm going to have a stroke. - Stop listening to him.
他对着我耳朵直嚷嚷他的见解啊！ He's screaming his opinions in my ear.
看看他拍的《鬼迷朱丽叶》或《爱情神话》 All that Juliet of the Spirits or Satyricon.
我发现简直是难以置信地自我陶醉 I found it incredibly indulgent.
他的确是最自我陶醉的电影人之一 He really is one of the most indulgent of filmmakers.
这里的关键词是"自我陶醉" Key word here is "indulgent. "
你为什么心情不好? - 我错过心理治疗了，我睡过头了 What are you depressed about? - I missed my therapy. I overslept.
你怎么会睡过头的嘛 How can you possibly oversleep?
闹钟没响 The alarm clock.
你知道吗，在我看来你的 这种态度真的是充满敌意? You know what a hostile gesture that is to me?
我知道，因为我们的性生活有问题，对吗? I know. Because of our sexual problem, right?
你是不是想让在"纽约客剧院"排队的每一个人都知道我们性生活的频率啊? Everybody in line has to know our rate of intercourse?
这有点像塞缪尔·贝克特 It's like Samuel Beckett.
你知道，我赞赏他的技巧 但是他无法真正打动我(肚子上揍一拳) I admire the technique, but it doesn't hit me on a gut level.
我倒是希望在这家伙的肚子上揍上一拳 - 行了，艾尔维！ I'd like to hit him on a gut level. - Stop it.
他说话的唾沫星子都喷到我脖颈里了 He's spitting on my neck when he talks.
你知道吗? 你也太自我为中心了！ You know something else? You're so egocentric that
我错过了治疗，可你想着的只有 那会对你造成什么影响！ if I miss my therapy you can only think of it in terms of how it affects you!
这是"世界观"的问题
也许这是他们的第一次约会 They're probably on their first date.
也许那女的是看了《纽约书评》上登的广告应约而来 Probably met by answering an ad in the New York Review of Books.
"三十出头学者，希望约一位女性 "Thirtyish academic wishes to meet woman...
她对莫扎特、詹姆斯·乔伊斯 和鸡奸有兴趣，" who's interested in Mozart, James Joyce and sodomy. "
你刚才说"我们的性生活有问题" 是什么意思? What do you mean "our sexual problem"?
对于一个在布鲁克林长大的人来说 我还是比较正常的 I'm comparatively normal for a guy raised in Brooklyn.
非常抱歉，是我的性生活有问题 行了吧?我的性生活有问题！ I'm sorry. My sexual problem. Okay? My sexual problem!
我没读过，那是亨利·詹姆斯的小说对吗?是《螺丝在旋紧》的续篇?"我的性…" I never read that. That was Henry James' sequel to Turn of the Screw?
这就是电视的影响力 It's the influence of television.
马歇尔·麦克鲁恩(加拿大传媒学家) 称其为具有高强度 Marshall McLuhan deals with it in terms of it being a high intensity.
你明白吗?一种强烈的媒体 Do you understand? A hot medium.
我真希望手头有只装满了马粪的大袜套！ What I wouldn't give for a large sock with horse manure in it.
当你排在一动不动的买电影票的队列里 在你身后有这样一个家伙，你怎么办? What do you do when you get stuck on a movie line with a guy like this?
真让人发疯！ - 慢着！为什么 我不可以发表意见?这是一个自由的国家！ Wait. Why can't I give my opinion? It's a free country!
他可以啊， 你有必要这么大声喧哗吗? He can. Do you have to give it so loud?
你不惭愧吗? 你那样的夸夸其谈，装腔作势? Aren't you ashamed to pontificate like that?
最逗的是，还…还马歇尔·麦克鲁恩呢！ 你压根就不知道谁是马歇尔·麦克鲁恩 The funny part is, you don't know anything about Marshall McLuhan.
哦，真的吗?我碰巧在哥伦比亚大学 教一门课，名字是"电视、传媒、及文化" I happen to teach a class at Columbia called "TV, Media and Culture. "
我想我对麦克鲁恩先生的认识 还是非常站得住脚的 I think my insights into Mr. McLuhan have a great deal of validity.
哦，是吗?那太有趣了 因为麦克鲁恩先生碰巧也在这里 Do you? That's funny, because I happen to have Mr. McLuhan right here.
因此，让我，让我… 你过来一下，现在告诉他 Just let me- Come over here. Tell him.
我听了你刚才扯的 I heard what you were saying.
你对我的著作一点也不了解 你的意思是我的所有谬误都是错的 You know nothing of my work. You mean my whole fallacy is wrong.
你这样上课能教出什么东西? 简直太不可思议了！ How you ever got to teach a course in anything is totally amazing!
哎，如果生活都像这样的话… If life were only like this.
《悲伤和怜悯》
1940年6月14日 德军占领巴黎 June 14, 1940. The German army occupies Paris.
全国上下，人们急切地渴望听到、收到的哪怕点滴的消息 All over the country, people are desperate for food.
法国抵抗组织的那些家伙真是勇敢 Those guys in the French Resistance were really brave.
他们不得不一直听 莫里斯·谢瓦利埃(法国谐星)唱歌 To have to listen to Maurice Chevalier sing so much.
是啊，有时我会问自己是否经受得住折磨 I know. Sometimes I ask myself how I'd stand up under torture.
你?开玩笑吧? You? You kidding?
盖世太保一收掉你的布鲁明戴尔信用卡 你就会乖乖地全招了 The Gestapo would take away your charge card, and you'd tell 'em everything.
那电影让我有负罪感 That movie makes me feel guilty.
是啊，因为本来就应该如此 It's supposed to.
艾尔维，我… - 怎么了? Alvy, I - What?
怎么了嘛！ - 我…我不知道 What's the matter?
这不对劲 我们睡在一张床上 It's not natural. We're sleeping in a bed together.
你看，已经很长时间了！ It's been a long time!
只是…，你看，我是说… It's just, I mean-
我明晚还要演唱 所以我想休息下嗓子 I've got to sing tomorrow night, so I have to rest my voice.
你总是有理由 你以前不是认为我很棒的嘛 It's always some kind of an excuse. You used to think I was very sexy.
我们刚开始约会的时候 可是频繁亲热的 When we first started going out, we had sex constantly.
可能都可以上《吉尼斯世界纪录》了 We're probably listed in The Guiness Book of World Records.
艾尔维，过一阵子就好了 只是我最近这段时间就是不想，就是这样 It'll pass. I'm going through a phase, that's all.
你以前结过婚 你应该知道有的时候就是这样子的 You've been married before. You know how things can get.
一开始，你不也和爱丽森打得火热 You were very hot for Allison at first.
你知道你紧接着克里斯·布朗上场 大概二十分钟以后 You know that you're on right after Chris Brown, in about 20 minutes.
对不起，我什么时候上? Excuse me. When do I go on?
你是谁? Who are you?
艾尔维·辛格 Alvy Singer.
我是演喜剧的 - 噢，喜剧演员，对 I'm the comedian. - Oh, comedian.
噢，你是下一个 Oh, you're on next.
你什么意思，我是下一个? What do you mean "next"?
我是说这个节目完了后，你就上场 You're on right after this act.
不能啊，他也在演喜剧啊！ - 是的 It can't be, because he's a comic. - Yes.
你是说你把两个喜剧节目排在一起啦? - 为什么不能? You're putting on two comics in a row? - Why not?
不，抱歉，我可不愿意接在 另一个喜剧演员后上场 No, I'm sorry. I'm not going to go on after another comedian.
没事的， - 不，因为他们一直在笑，我还是不上的好 It's okay. - No. They're laughing. I'd rather not.
你别那么紧张，行吗? 他们会喜欢你的，我保证 Will you relax, please? They're going to love you.
我还是不上的好， 因为，你瞧，他们正冲着他大笑呢 I know. I prefer not to. Look, they're laughing at him.
你什么意思? 他们会一直笑个几分钟 What are you telling me? They'll laugh at him a few minutes.
然后我也想要他们的笑声 他们还能再笑得出来吗? Then I've got to get laughs, too. How much can they laugh?
他们都笑光了啊！ - 你别这么激动行吗? They're laughed out. - Do you feel all right?
天哪！ Jesus.
你叫什么名字? - 爱丽森， What's your name? - Allison.
是吗?爱丽森什么? Yeah? Allison what?
普曲尼克 Portchnik.
普曲尼克?好名子 - 谢谢 Portchnik? That's nice. - Thank you.
这么说，你一直在史蒂文森手下干? So, you work for Stevenson all the time?
不，不，我正在做我的学位论文 - 论题是? No. I'm doing my thesis. - On what?
"二十世纪文学的政治义务" Political commitment in 20th-century literature.
这么说你属于纽约犹太人 左翼自由派知识分子 You're like New York Jewish, left-wing, intellectual
住在中央公园西街、上布兰德斯大学 参加社会主义夏令营 Central Park West, Brandeis University, socialist summer camps
父亲喜欢本·肖恩(犹太画家)的画，对吗? and the father with the Ben Shahn drawings...
经常喜欢罢工… really strike-oriented-
如果你觉得我像个十足的白痴 你尽可以打断我 Stop me before I make a complete imbecile of myself.
不，这太棒了！我喜欢被人简单地 从文化上划入某一类(反话) That was wonderful! I love being reduced to a cultural stereotype.
是吗，我是个固执己见的人，左翼的 Right. I'm a bigot, but for the left.
我要出场了 说点鼓励的话，快 I have to go out there. Say something encouraging, quickly.
我觉得你很可爱 - 是吗?真的吗? I think you're cute. - Yeah? Do you?
上吧 Go ahead.
我不知道他们怎么会让我参加这样的集会 I don't know why they would have me at this kind of rally
因为我本来根本不是表演政治喜剧的 'cause I'm not essentially a political comedian.
有意思的是，我曾和艾森豪威尔班子里的… I interestingly had dated a woman...
一位女士约会过，时间不长 in the Eisenhower administration, briefly.
在我看来这真的很滑稽 It was ironic to me...
因为我想要对她"做"的事情 'cause I was trying to do to her...
正是艾森豪威尔在过去八年里 一直对这个国家"做"的 what Eisenhower's been doing to the country for the last eight years.
对不起，我无法继续下去了 I'm sorry. I can't go through with this.
因为我无法忘记这事，爱丽森 它一直困扰着我！ I can't get it off my mind! It's obsessing me!
噢，我真受够你了！ 你要你更加专注一点！ I'm getting tired of it. I need your attention.
但是这太说不通了 他的车通过存书房 But it doesn't make any sense. He drove past the book depository...
可警察确凿地说那伤口是 子弹穿出造成的 and the police said conclusively that it was an exit wound.
因此，奥斯瓦尔德怎么可能 同时从两个不同的角度射击呢? So how is it possible for Oswald to have fired from two angles at once?
这太荒唐了嘛！ - 艾尔维！ It doesn't make sense!
我来告诉你 他的枪法没那么好 I'll tell you this. He was not marksman enough...
在那么远距离射中一个移动的目标 to hit a moving target at that range.
但是，如果有第二个杀手… But if there was a second assassin-
那么就结了！ - 我们已经说过这个了 That's it! - We've been through this.
他们找到了从那把来复枪掉出的弹壳 They recovered the shells from that rifle.
好吧，你现在想说什么? What are you saying now?
沃伦委员会的每一个人 都卷进了这个阴谋，是吗? That everybody on the Warren Commission is in on this conspiracy, right?
为什么不会? Why not?
厄尔·沃伦? - 亲爱的，我不确定厄尔·沃伦是否卷入， Earl Warren? - Honey, I don't know Earl Warren.
林登·约翰逊? Lyndon Johnson?
林登·约翰逊?林登·约翰逊是个政客！ Lyndon Johnson is a politician!
你知道那些家伙的道德观 他们比儿童骚扰犯还要低一个档次 You know the ethics those guys have. It's a notch underneath child molester.
那么每一个人都参与了阴谋 Then everybody's in on the conspiracy.
联邦调查局、中央情报局 约翰·埃德加·胡佛、还有石油公司 The FBl and the CIA and J. Edgar Hoover, the oil companies
五角大楼、再加白宫卫生间里的服务生? the Pentagon, the men's-room attendant at the White House?
我看卫生间里的服务生可以排除掉 I would leave out the men's-room attendant.
你这是在用阴谋论 作为逃避和我做爱的借口 You're using this conspiracy theory as an excuse to avoid sex with me.
噢，我的上帝！她说得对 Oh, my God! She's right.
为什么我要拒绝爱丽森·普曲尼克? Why did I turn off Allison Portchnik?
她那么漂亮，那么心甘情愿 而且她也真的很聪明 She was beautiful. She was willing. She was real intelligent.
是不是这就像格劳乔·马克斯的 老笑话说的那样 Is it the old Groucho Marx joke...
我只是不想加入这样的俱乐部 它的会员是像我这样的人? that I don't want to belong to any club that would have me for a member?
艾尔维，不要慌！快抓住它！ - 我早就跟你说过… Alvy, don't panic! - It's a mistake...
不要把活的东西带回屋里 to bring a live thing in the house.
别，别那样做！ 快抓那边那个 Don't do that.
也许我们应该报警 快拨911，那是专门对付龙虾的分队 Maybe we should call the police. Dial 911. It's the lobster squad.
得了吧，它们只是小龙虾 看在上帝的份上！ They're only baby ones. For God sakes.
它们只是小龙虾?那你把它们捡起来 - 好吧！行了！ If they're babies, you pick them up. - All right! All right!
给你这个！ - 别给我！别这样！ Here you go! - Don't give it to me.
快看！一个爬到冰箱后面去了 Look! One crawled behind the refrigerator.
它晚上会出现在我们的床上 快把那家伙拿开！天哪！ It'll turn up in our bed at night. Get out of here with that thing!
跟它谈谈吧，你不是会说贝壳语嘛 Talk to him. You speak shellfish.
咳，看，快把它放到锅里！ Hey, put it in the pot.
我不能，我不能把一个活的 东西放进热水锅里 I can't. I can't put a live thing in hot water.
给我，让我来，你觉得我们应该怎样做 带它去看电影? What d'you think we were going to do, take him to the movies?
好，艾尔维！噢，谢谢！ Good. Oh, thank you.
行了，放进去了，它绝对在锅里了 Okay, it's in. It's definitely in the pot.
安妮，有一只大的龙虾在冰箱后面 Annie, there's a big lobster behind the refrigerator.
我弄它不出来，冰箱太沉了 I can't get it out. This thing's heavy.
也许我放一盘奶油沙司再加把 胡桃钳子在这儿，它就会从另一边跑出来了 Maybe if I put a dish of butter sauce here, it'll run out the other side.
我去取我的相机，等等 I'm going to get my camera.
要是我能撬开… I think if I could pry-
我们应该买牛排的 因为它们没有腿，它们不会到处乱跑 We should have gotten steaks, 'cause they don't have legs and run around.
噢，讨厌！噢，天哪！
抓着这个龙虾，抓住它，快！ - 你什么意思?现在还要拍照片? Pick this lobster up. Hold it, please. - You're going to take pictures now?
艾尔维，那很好玩的，噢，太妙了！ Alvy, it'll be wonderful. Oh, lovely!
天哪，太恶心了！ - 再来一张，艾尔维！快点，再来一张！ It's disgusting. - One more, please? One more.
噢，好！好！ Good!
那么这是我想知道的 我是你第一个真正的情人吗? Here's what I want to know. Am I your first, big romance?
噢，不，不是的
真的吗?那是谁? - 噢，那是齐佩瓦瀑布市高中的丹尼斯 Who was? - There was Dennis from high school.
丹尼斯吗?当地男孩?那么一定在 周六晚上在电影院门口和你约会? Local kid who'd meet you in front of the movie house on Saturday night?
噢，天哪，你应该看看我那时候的样子 - 我可以想象，也许像个宇航员的妻子 You should've seen how I looked then. - I can imagine. An astronaut's wife.
然后就是杰里，他是演员 - 你看看你 Then there was Jerry, the actor. - Look at you.
真的很可笑 You're such a clown.
我看上去很漂亮 - 你总是很漂亮，但是那个和你在一起的家伙！ I look pretty. - You always do. But that guy with you!
表演，就如同对灵魂的探索 是非常宗教性的 Acting is like an exploration of the soul. It's very religious.
就像是某种意识的解放 Like a kind of liberating consciousness.
又像是一首视觉上的诗歌 It's like a visual poem.
哈，他那样胡扯不是在开玩笑吧? Is he kidding with that crap?
噢，对！ Oh, right!
是的，我想我知道你说的 "宗教性的"确切意思是什么 Right. I think I know exactly what you mean when you say "religious. "
你真知道? - 行行好！我那时太年轻了 You do? - Come on. I was younger.
咳，那才是去年啊！ That was last year!
就像是我想起死亡的感觉 你知道我愿意怎么死吗? It's like when I think of dying. You know how I'd like to die?
不知道，怎么死? How?
我希望被野兽撕成碎片 I'd like to get torn apart by wild animals.
够猛！被松鼠啃掉 - 咳，听着，他是个出色的演员 Heavy! Eaten by some squirrels. - He was a terrific actor.
看看他！长得也很优雅，而且感情丰富 He's neat looking and he was emotional.
对了，我想你不太喜欢感情化的吧 I don't think you like emotion too much.
用你的脚摸一下我的心 Touch my heart with your foot.
我去吐先！ I may throw up.
他的确是有点怪 - 承认了吧！ He was creepy. - Yeah!
我想你遇见我真是很幸运 - 哦，真的吗?呵呵，啦-嘀-哒！ You're pretty lucky I came along. - Oh, really? La-de-dah!
"啦-嘀-哒"，要是以前有人跟我说 我会和一个满嘴"啦-嘀-哒"的姑娘约会 If anyone ever told me that I'd be taking out a girl...
我肯定以为他是个疯子 who used expressions like "la-de-dah"-
是啊，你只喜欢那些纽约女孩 That's right. You really like those New York girls.
嗯，不"只"是啦，不全是啦 - 我看是的，你不是结了两次婚都是纽约女孩吗? Not just. Not only. - I'd say so. You married two of them.
那位是亨利·德鲁克 There's Henry Drucker.
他在普林斯顿历史系有个位置(椅子) He has a Chair in History at Princeton.
那矮个的男人是赫歇尔·卡明斯基，他在康奈尔哲学系有个位置(椅子) The short man is Hershel Kaminsky. He has a Chair in Philosophy at Cornell.
再加两把椅子，他们就可以搞定个餐室了 Two more chairs, they got a dining room set.
你为什么那样充满敌意? - 因为我想在电视上看尼克斯队的比赛 Why are you so hostile? - I want to watch the Knicks on TV.
那是保罗·古德曼吗?不 Is that Paul Goodman? No.
对主人客气点 因为他正在出版我写的书 Be nice to the host, because he's publishing my book.
嗨，道格！那是道格拉斯·外厄思 Hi, Doug. Douglas Wyeth...
"污秽的回收心灵破烂之店" (叶芝：《遗弃马戏团动物》) The Foul Rag-and-Bone Shop of the Heart.
我真受够了整晚和那些… I'm so tired of spending evenings...
干"痢疾"活的人 进行假惺惺的探讨 making fake insights with people who work for Dysentery.
干"评论"活的人 Commentary.
哦，是吗?我怎么听说"评论"和"异议" 已经合并成了"痢疾" I heard Commentary and Dissent had merged and formed Dysentery.
别说笑了，他们都是朋友，行吗? No jokes. These are friends. Okay?
克里夫兰骑士队要输给纽约尼克斯队了 Cleveland Cavaliers losing to the New York Knicks.
你在这儿哪 那外面都是人哪 Here you are. There's people out there.
两分钟前，尼克斯队还领先十四分 Two minutes ago, the Knicks are ahead 14 points...
可现在他们才领先两分了 and now they're ahead two points.
艾尔维，一帮子脑垂体变异的怪胎… Alvy, what is so fascinating...
忙活着将只圆球塞进个铁圈子里 究竟有什么吸引人的? about a group of pituitary cases trying to stuff a ball through a hoop?
吸引人的地方在于这是体力活 What is fascinating is that it's physical.
而有关于智力往往是 That's one thing about intellectuals:
知识分子可以看起来很才华横溢 而实则却是狗屁不通 They've proved you can be brilliant and have no idea what's going on.
但从另一方面来说，身体却从不口是心非，就像你我都知道现在该干什么 But, on the other hand, the body doesn't lie as we now know.
别装疯卖傻了！ Stop acting out.
那感觉会很棒的，因为那些博士们都在那儿讨论… It'll be great, because all those Ph. D.s are in there discussing
离间的模式啥的 而我们却在这儿静悄悄地嘿咻嘿咻 modes of alienation, and we'll be in here quietly humping.
艾尔维，别这样！ 你这是利用性来表达你的敌意 Don't. You're using sex to express hostility.
"为什么你总是把我的动物本能 降格到心理分析的范畴" "Why do you always reduce my animal urges to psychoanalytic categories"
他一边说一边解她的胸罩 he said as he removed her brassier.
艾尔维，外面有从《纽约客》杂志来的人啊！ There are people out there from the New Yorker magazine!
老天啊！他们会怎么想? My God! What would they think?
- 该死的警笛！ - 别生气！ - Damn siren! - Don't get upset.
妈的！我已经差不多了！ Damn it! I was so close!
天哪，昨晚是因为有个家伙直按喇叭 Last night it was a guy honking his car horn.
我是说，整座城市不可能完全安静下来嘛！ The city can't close down.
你想让他们把机场也关闭啦? 没有了飞机我们才可以做爱? You want them to close the airport so we can have sex?
我太紧张了，我要吃一片安定 I'm too tense. I need a Valium.
我心理医生说我应该住在乡间而不是纽约 My analyst says I should live in the country and not in New York.
我不能住在…我们不能老是讨论这个话题 乡间让我神经紧张 We can't have this discussion all the time. The country makes me nervous.
蟋蟀到处乱爬，安静得要死 晚饭后也没地方散步 You've got crickets. It's quiet. There's no place to walk after dinner.
还有遮帘后面藏有好多死掉的蛾子 There's the screens with the dead moths behind them.
说不定你还会遇上曼森家族(杀人"家族")或者是迪克和佩里(见影片《卡波蒂》) You got the Manson family, possibly. You got Dick and Perry.
行了！打住！医生只是说我太精神紧张了！ 他妈的我的的安定在哪儿? Okay! My analyst just thinks I'm too tense! Where's the goddamn Valium?
好了，现在安静下来了 我们可以重新开始 Okay, it's quiet now. We can get started again.
不行！我的头在抽抽 I can't! My head is throbbing.
你头痛了? - 我头痛！ You got a headache? - I have a headache!
厉害吗? - 像《群鬼》(易卜生戏剧)里的奥斯瓦尔德(患性病而死) Bad? - Like Oswald in Ghosts.
上帝啊！ - 你去哪儿? Jesus. - Where are you going?
我要去洗另一系列的冷水澡 I'm going to take another in a series of cold showers.
麦克斯，我的发球会让你早点回来洗澡 Max, my serve is going to send you to the showers early.
行啊，行啊 还是先回到我们刚才谈论的话题吧 Right. To get back to what we were discussing.
这个国家不支持纽约市就是种反犹主义 The failure of the country to get behind New York City is anti-Semitism.
麦克斯，这座城市搞得很差劲啊 Max, the city is terribly run.
我不是在讨论政治或者经济 那只是包皮 I'm not discussing politics or economics. This is foreskin.
你逃脱得也太轻巧了, 每当有人跟你的意见相左，你都把它归为反犹主义 That's a convenient out. When some group disagrees with you, it's anti-Semitism.
你没觉得这个国家的其它地方是这样看纽约的 The rest of the country looks upon New York...
好像我们都是些左翼的共产主义的犹太人 而且还是同性恋的色情狂? like we're left-wing, communist, Jewish, homosexual pornographers.
连我有时候都这样看我们自己了 况且我还生活在这儿呢 I think of us that way sometimes, and I live here.
麦克斯，如果我们生活在加利福尼亚 那么我们就可以天天在阳光下做户外运动了 Max, if we lived in California, we could play outdoors every day in the sun.
阳光对你没什么好处 我们的父母说是好的东西没有一件是好的 Sun is bad for you. Everything our parents said was good is bad.
阳光、牛奶、牛羊肉、大学，统统无益 Sun, milk, red meat, college.
我知道，但是我…
哎呀，他来了！ Egad, here he comes.
你认识艾尔维吗?这是珍妮特 You know Alvy? This is Janet.
- 这是安妮·霍尔 - 这是艾尔维 - This is Annie Hall. - This is Alvy.
谁跟谁玩呢? - 你和我对她们俩? Who's playing with who here? - You and me against them?
这不公平 - 我打得不好 That's not fair. - I can't play too good.
我才上过四节课 I've had four lessons.
那么… Well...
再见 bye.
你打得很好 - 哦，是吗?你也是！ You play very well. - Oh, yeah? So do you!
天哪，这样说话真的好傻 God, what a dumb thing to say.
你说"你打得很好"， 我马上要回一句"你打得很好" You say "You play well," and right away I have to say, "You play well. "
噢，天哪，安妮 Oh, God, Annie.
嗯，噢，那好！ Well. Oh, well!
啦-嘀-哒，啦-嘀-哒，啦啦… La-de-dah.
要让我捎你一程吗? You want a lift?
噢，什么?你有车吗? Oh, why? You got a car?
没有，我是想叫辆出租 No, I was going to take a cab.
噢，不用了，我有车 Oh, no. I have a car.
你有车? You have a car?
那么我有点不明白，你如果有车 If you have a car...
你怎么还问："你有车吗?" 听起来像是你想搭我的车 then why did you say, "Do you have a car" like you wanted a lift?
天哪，我不知道，我没想…噗… Geez, I don't know. I wasn't-
我有辆大众在外面 I got this VW out there.
真的好傻！ What a jerk.
你想要搭车吗?呵呵… Would you like a lift?
当然好，你往哪儿走? - 我?噢，我上市中心 Sure. Which way are you going? - Me? Oh, downtown.
我上市区外 I'm going uptown.
噢，我也上市区外 Oh, I'm going uptown, too.
你不是说你上市中心吗? - 噢，是的，可是我也可以… You said you were going downtown. - Yeah, well
我也可以上市区外 我住在市区外，但是… I can go uptown, too. I live uptown.
怎么了?有个人做伴感觉好点 你知道，我讨厌一个人驾车 What the hell? It would be nice having company. I hate driving alone.
那么你认识珍妮特多长时间了? 在哪儿认识她的? How long do you know Janet? Where do you know her from?
我上她的表演课 - 啊，你是演员！ I'm in her acting class. - You're an actress!
嗯，我拍点广告啥的 Well, I do commercials, sort of.
你小心看着点路！ 你不是纽约人，对吗? You want to watch the road? You're not from New York, right?
齐佩瓦瀑布市 - 是啊 Chippewa Falls. - Right.
哪儿? - 威斯康星 Where? - Wisconsin.
你开得有点快哈 - 别担心，我车开得很好 You're driving a tad rapidly. - Don't worry. I'm a very good driver.
你想吃口香糖吗? - 不，谢谢 You want some gum? - No, thanks.
它们放哪儿去了? - 别，别，别那样，看着点路 Where is it? - Don't do that. No, no, watch the road.
我自己来，你专心驾车，行吗? I'll get it. Concentrate, will ya?
我来给你一颗 - 我说，你开车吗? I'll get you a piece. - Listen. You drive?
我开车吗? 不，我开不了车 Do I drive? No, I got a problem with driving.
- 是吗? - 是的 - You do? - Yeah.
我有驾照，但是我有种抗拒心理 I got a license, but I have too much hostility.
你的车不错，要好好保养 Nice car. You keep it nice.
我能问你一下，这是三明治吗? - 噢，是的 Can I ask you, is this a sandwich? - Oh, yeah.
我住在这儿，噢，我的上帝，快看！ 那儿有个空车位 I live over here. Oh, my God, look! There's a parking space.
不要紧，我们可以从这儿走到马路沿上 That's okay, we can walk to the curb from here.
你想拿着你的网球拍吗? 你想拿着你的用具吗? You want your tennis stuff? You want your gear?
是的，很好，谢谢 非常感谢 Yeah. That's good. Thanks. Thanks a lot. Well.
那么… Well.
谢谢 - 谢谢 Thank you. - Thank you.
你网球打得很棒， You're a wonderful tennis player...
但是你的车开得 是我这辈子见到过的最糟的 and you're the worst driver I've ever seen in my life.
任何地方最糟的 欧洲，英…任何地方，亚洲 Anyplace. Europe. Anyplace. Asia.
我喜欢你的穿着 - 哦，是吗? I love what you're wearing. - You do? Yeah.
嗯，这条领带是格莱美·霍尔给我的礼物 This tie is a present from Grammy Hall.
谁?格莱美?谁是格莱美·霍尔? Who? Grammy Hall?
是的，我的格莱美奶奶 Yeah, my grammy.
怎么回事?你难道是在诺曼.罗克威尔(美国风俗画家)的画中长大的吗?你的奶奶? What did you do, grow up in a Norman Rockwell painting? Your grammy?
我知道，是有点傻不啦叽的，对吗? - 天哪，我奶奶从没给过我礼物 It's pretty silly, isn't it? - My grammy never gave gifts.
她忙着被哥萨克士兵强奸了 She was too busy getting raped by Cossacks.
那么，再次谢谢你 Well, thank you again.
噢，好 Oh, yeah.
咳，听着，你想不想上去喝一杯或什么? Listen. You want to come upstairs and have a glass of wine or something?
噢不，不是说你非得去 如果你已经有什么事要迟到了的话 No, I mean you don't have to. You're probably late and everything.
不，那太好了，我很乐意，真的 No, that would be fine. I wouldn't mind. Sure.
我有时间，在我去见 我的心理医生之前，没什么事 I got time. I got nothing until my analyst appointment.
你看心理医生? You see an analyst?
是啊，有十五年了 - 有十五年啦? Just for 15 years. - 15 years?
我打算再让他看一年，再不行的话我就去卢尔德(法国小镇，天主教圣地)朝圣 I'm going to give him one more year, and then I'm going to Lourdes.
十五年?不，别逗了！是吗?真的? 15? Nah, come on! Yeah? Really?
希尔薇娅·普拉斯，很有个性的女诗人 她的自杀悲剧… Sylvia Plath. Interesting poetess whose tragic suicide...
在一些大学里的女孩子们看来居然很浪漫 was misinterpreted as romantic by the college-girl mentality.
是啊，我不知道 我是说，她的有些诗看上去很优雅 Right. I don't know. I mean, some of her poems seem neat.
"优雅"?我不得不提醒你现在是1975年 Neat? I hate to tell you this is 1975.
你知道，"优雅"在本世纪初 就已经开始消亡了 "Neat" went out at the turn of the century.
墙上的那些照片是谁? Who are those photos on the wall?
噢，噢，你瞧… Oh, you see...
那是我爹地，我父亲 那是我弟弟，杜温 that's my dad, that's Father, and that's my brother, Duane.
是的，杜温 那边是格莱美·霍尔 Yeah, right. And over there's Grammy Hall.
这是塞蒂 - 塞蒂是谁? And that's Sadie. - Who's Sadie?
噢，呵呵，塞迪通过格莱美的哥哥乔治 认识的格莱美 Well, Sadie met Grammy through Grammy's brother, George.
乔治人很好，但是他得了种病 George was real sweet. He had that thing.
那叫什么病来着?就是讲话讲到一半 你就会睡过去的那种?你知道吗? What is that thing where you fall asleep in the middle of a sentence?
嗜眠症 - 嗜眠症，对！ Narcolepsy. - Right.
是这样，乔治有一次去(退伍军人?)联合会 领免费的火鸡 So anyway, George went to the union to get his free turkey...
因为联合会总会在圣诞期间 发给乔治免费的火鸡 because the union always gave George this free turkey at Christmastime...
因为他在一次大战中患上了弹震症 because he was shell-shocked in the first World War.
不管那么多了，乔治排在队伍中间 Anyway, so George is standing in line...
准备领他的免费火鸡 getting his free turkey...
但滑稽的是他突然就睡过去了 而且就再也没醒过来 but the thing is he falls asleep, and he never wakes up.
因此他死掉了 So he's dead.
他死掉了，是啊 He's dead. Yeah.
噢，天哪 Oh, dear.
嗯，很可怕，对吗?你认为呢? Well, terrible, huh? Wouldn't you say?
我是说太可怕了 Pretty awful.
不过故事倒很精彩 我今天收获颇丰 It's a great story, though. It really made my day.
我想我得走了 因为我觉得我可能影响到你了 I think I should get out of here, 'cause I think I'm imposing.
是吗?也许… - 你知道，我… Really? Maybe-
你没必要急着走，我说 - 我知道，可是我浑身是汗 You don't have to. - But I'm all perspired and everything.
你没在俱乐部冲个澡吗? Didn't you take a shower at the club?
我?没有，我从来不在公共场合洗澡 No, no. I never shower in a public place.
为什么不? Why not?
因为我不想在其他男人面前裸着身子 I don't like to get naked in front of another man.
噢，我明白了 I see.
我不愿意被同性的男子看到我的身体 I don't like to show my body to a man of my gender.
是啊，我想我明白了 - 你不知道会不会发生什么意外的事情 I see, I guess. - You never know what's going to happen.
看了十五年心理医生，哈? - 十五年了，是啊 15 years, huh? - 15 years, yeah.
万事如意 God bless.
是啊！嗯… Well! Well-
你是那种格莱美·霍尔 会称为"十足的犹太人"的人 You're what Grammy Hall would call "a real Jew. "
噢，谢谢 Thank you.
她讨厌犹太人 在她眼里犹太人只会赚钱， She hates Jews. She thinks they just make money.
但是我可以告诉你，她自己就是 这样跟你说：嗜钱如命 But she's the one, is she ever. I'm telling you.
那么，里面的那些照片是你自己拍的吗? So, did you do those photographs in there?
是的，我只是随便玩玩而已，你知道(随便玩玩?听听你自己都说的啥，笨蛋！) I dabble? Listen to me. What a jerk. Yeah, I sort of dabble around, you know.
拍得不错，很有特性 (你是个漂亮的姑娘) You are a great-looking girl. They're wonderful. They have a quality.
是吗，我倒愿意参加一个正规的摄影课程 (也许他会认为我很愚蠢) He probably thinks I'm a yo-yo. Well, I would like to take a serious photography course.
摄影很有意思，因为… Photography's interesting because...
这是一种新的艺术形式一系列的美学标准还没建立起来(我想看看她不穿衣服的样子) I wonder what she looks like naked. it's a new art form. A set of aesthetic criteria have not emerged yet.
美学标准?你的意思是如何判断一幅摄影的好坏,是吗?(我在他眼里一定显得很笨，认了吧) I'm not smart enough for him. Hang in there. You mean whether it's a good photo or not?
摄影工具会对艺术形式本身的状态起到作用(我不知道自己在瞎掰啥她一定感觉到了我的浅薄) I don't know what I'm saying. She senses I'm shallow. The medium enters in as a condition of the art form itself.
嗯，对我来说，我的意思是…都是出于直觉(老天，我希望他别像其他人一样到头来也是一个混蛋) God, I hope he doesn't turn out to be a schmuck like the others. Well, to me- I mean- It's all instinctive.
我只是试着去感觉，试着去把握，而并没有考虑得太多， I just try to feel it, to get a sense of it and not think about it so much.
问题是，从社会的角度来看 你还是需要些审美的导向的，我想 (天哪，我的话听上去像是调频广播，放松点！) Christ, I sound like FM radio. Relax. Still, you need aesthetic guidelines to put it in social perspective.
我不知道 我想你是不是快要迟到啦 I don't know. I mean, I guess you must be sort of late.
你知道，我马上可以 开始到医生那里大倒苦水了 You know, I've got to get there and begin whining soon.
你星期五晚上有事吗? Are you busy Friday night?
我?噢，没有 Me? Oh, no.
噢，对不起，等等，我有事 星期六晚上呢? Oh, I'm sorry, I have something. What about Saturday night?
没有，没事， Nothing. No, no.
我可以看出来 你可真够受欢迎的哈！(反话) You're very popular, I can see.
我知道 - 怎么?你有瘟疫? I know. - You have plague?
我碰到过太多的混蛋 I meet a lot of jerks.
是吗?我也碰到过很多混蛋 I meet a lot of jerks, too.
我在想是否养几只猫算了 I'm thinking about getting some cats.
噢，等一下！不，不！噢，见鬼！ Wait a second! No, no! Oh, shoot!
星期六晚上我要去…我要去唱歌 Saturday night, I'm going to sing.
你要去唱歌?你唱歌?没开玩笑? You're going to sing? You sing? No kidding!
- 这是我第一次演唱 - 真的吗?在哪儿啊? - This is my first time. - Really? Where?
我想去听听 I'd like to come.
- 不，不，我只是… - 我很有兴趣 - I'm interested. - No, no. I'm just a-
我只是在那家夜总会试唱一下 是我的第一次 I'm auditioning at this club. It's my first time.
没事的，因为我知道夜总会是怎么回事 That's okay, 'cause I know exactly what that's like.
听着，你会喜欢夜总会的 真的会很有乐趣的 You're going to like nightclubs. They're really a lot of fun.
那一定是你 It had to be you
我四处徘徊，最终发现 I wandered around And finally found
这某个人 This somebody who
能使我真诚 Could make me be true
能使我忧郁 Could make me be blue
甚至快乐 And even be glad
想起你 Just to be sad
就使我忧伤 Thinking of you
我糟透了！我真丢脸！ 我根本不会唱歌 I was awful! I'm so ashamed! I can't sing.
只是观众有一丁点不安分 So the audience was a tad restless.
你什么意思，"一丁点不安分"? 噢，我的上帝啊，他们讨厌我！ What do you mean, "a tad restless"? My God, they hated me!
不，他们没讨厌你 你的声音很棒的 No, they didn't. You have a wonderful voice.
我打算放弃了 - 我不会让你放弃的 I'm going to quit. - I'm not going to let you.
你的声音很美妙 - 真的吗?你真这样想的? You have a great voice. - Do you think so, really?
真的！非常出色 - 你知道吗?我甚至从没上过这方面的课 Yeah! It's terrific. - I never even took a lesson either.
- 听着，听着，吻我一下 - 真的吗? - Listen, give me a kiss. - Really?
为什么不?因为我们会呆到 很晚才回家，是吗? Why not? Because we're just going to go home later.
我们还没接过吻 所以总有些不自在 There's going to be all that tension. We've never kissed before.
我会一直在想该什么时候吻你什么的 I'll never know when to make the right move.
所以我们现在吻一下，就可以克服掉紧张 然后我们就可以去吃饭了，行吗? We'll kiss now and get it over with, and then we'll go eat. Okay?
我们就可以更好地消化食物了 We'll digest our food better.
好，现在我们可以去消化食物了 Okay? Now we can digest our food.
请来份咸牛肉 Corned beef, please.
我要五香熏牛肉、白面包 I'm having pastrami on white bread...
还有蛋黄酱、西红柿、和生菜 with mayonnaise, tomatoes and lettuce.
那么，你第二任妻子离开了你 So, your second wife left you.
你为此觉得沮丧吗? Were you depressed about that?
没什么，吃一点强力维他命就好了 Nothing that a few mega-vitamins couldn't cure.
你的第一个妻子，爱丽森? - 对，她很好 Your first wife, Allison. - She was nice.
但是，你知道，那是我的错，我太疯狂了 That was my fault. I was too crazy.
感觉真好！感觉真好 That was so nice! That was nice.
就像巴尔扎克说的："这是一部新的小说" As Balzac said, "There goes another novel. "
你好棒！ You were great.
噢，是吗?是吗? Oh, yeah? Yeah?
- 是的，我失魂落魄了 - 你失魂落魄了 - Yeah, I'm wrecked. - You're wrecked.
真的，我再也不弹钢琴了 I mean it. I'll never play the piano again.
我不知道 你真的认为很棒吗? It was, I don't know. You really thought it was good?
很棒?是的，岂止很棒，这简直是我获得的 不发出笑声的最大的乐趣了 Good? Yes. No, that was the most fun I've had without laughing.
给，想吸一口吗? Here, you want some?
不，我不用任何大的致幻药 No, I don't use any major hallucinogenics.
因为我以前吸过一次 大概五年前在一次聚会上 I took a puff about five years ago at a party...
结果是我试图把我的裤子从头上脱下来 卡在我的一只耳朵上了 and tried to take my pants off over my head.
我不知道，我也不经常吸 只是有时想放松一下自己 I don't do it very often. It just sort of relaxes me.
- 可能有点难以置信，但是… - 怎么?怎么啦? - You won't believe this, but- - What?
《死亡和西方思想》、《拒绝死亡》
咳，我要给你买这两本书 I'm going to buy you these books...
因为我认为你应该读这些书 而不是什么养猫经 because I think you should read them instead of that cat book.
这些是很严肃的东西啊 That's pretty serious stuff.
是的，因为你知道 我对死亡很着迷，我想是的 I'm obsessed with death, I think.
这对我来说是个很重要的主题 我对人生的看法非常悲观 It's a big subject with me. I have a pessimistic view of life.
如果你想和我在一起 你就应该了解我的这方面 You should know this about me if we're going to go out.
我觉得人生可以划分为 "可怕"和"可悲"两种 I feel that life is divided up into the horrible and the miserable.
就是这两种类别，你知道 Those are the two categories.
"可怕"包括那些，我不知道 绝症病人啊、盲人啊、残疾人啊 The horrible would be like terminal cases and blind people, cripples.
我不知道他们怎样度过这一生 简直不可思议，你知道 I don't know how they get through life. It's amazing to me.
而剩下的都是"可悲"的 And the miserable is everyone else.
因此你在度过这一生时 应该感到庆幸自己是个"可悲"的人 So when you go through life, be thankful that you're miserable.
因为你运气好才成为"可悲"的人的 You're very lucky to be miserable.
瞧那边那个家伙，他是"粉红衣服"先生 他是"迈阿密海滩"先生 Look at that guy. There's Mr. Miami Beach in the pink.
他才参加金拉米纸牌的决赛圈回来 He's just come back from the gin rummy finals.
拿了个第三名 He placed third.
瞧那两个家伙，那么开心 他们才从火岛回来 Look at these guys. That's hilarious. They're back from Fire Island.
像是抓住了一次浪漫的机会 They're sort of giving it a chance romantically.
噢，这个是意大利人，对吗? - 他?对，他是黑手党 Italian, right? - Him? He's the Mafia.
亚麻供应商或混凝土及工程承包商，我猜是 Linen supply business or cement and contracting.
"噢，天哪，我应该在胡子上上点蜡的" Oh, gee, mess up my moustache wax.
这位是"杜鲁门·卡波蒂模仿比赛"的优胜者 There's the winner of the Truman Capote look-alike contest.
你极度地性感，难以置信地性感，是的，你是的 - 不，才不是呢 You are unbelievably sexy. Yes, you are.
因为你知道你怎么样吗? 你有"多种形态的乖张反常" You know what you are? You're polymorphously perverse.
那是什么意思? 我不知道那是什么 What does that mean? I don't know what that is.
你在床上非常特别 You're exceptional in bed...
因为当我碰到你身体的任何一部分时 你都会有快感 because you get pleasure in every part of your body when I touch it.
譬如你的鼻尖，如果我敲你的牙齿 或拍你的膝盖 Like the tip of your nose, and if I stroke your teeth or your knee caps...
你一定马上就兴奋了 you certainly get excited.
你知道吗?我喜欢你，我真的很喜欢你 You know what? I like you, I really do.
但是你爱不爱我? 这才是关键问题 But do you love me? That's the key question.
我知道我们认识的时间还不长 I know you've only known me a short while.
我想那是…是的，是的 I think that's sort of- Yeah, yeah.
你爱我吗? Do you love me?
"爱"是一个太弱的词—— 我"嗳"你，你知道 Love is too weak a word for what- I "lurve" you.
我"暧"你，我"瞹"你，"口"越来越多 是的，我得发明点… I "loave" you. I "luff" you, with two "f"s.
我当然是的，你不觉得吗? Of course I do. Don't you think I do?
我不知道 I don't know.
你什么意思? 你不是想放弃你自己的公寓吧，是吗? What do you mean? You're not going to give up your own apartment, are you?
- 我想放弃 - 但是，为什么啊? - Of course. - But why?
我搬来和你一起住啊，这就是为什么 I'm moving in with you, that's why.
- 但是你的公寓不错啊 - 我的公寓很小 - But you have a nice apartment. - I have a tiny apartment.
- 我知道它很小， - 对！而且里面的水管也坏了，还有好多虫子 - I know it's small. - And it's got bad plumbing and bugs.
行，同意！水管坏了、有好多虫子 但是，听起来那像是坏事似的 Granted, it has bad plumbing and bugs. You say that like it's a negative.
你知道虫子是… Bugs are-
昆虫学是一门正在快速发展的学科 - 你不愿意我和你住在一起！ Entomology is a rapidly growing field. - You don't want me to live with you.
- 我不愿意你和我住在一起?谁这样想的? - 我 - I don't? Whose idea was it? - Mine.
是的，事实上是你这样想的 It was yours, actually.
但是，我也立刻同意了 But I approved it immediately.
我猜你是以为 我想把自己的意愿强加在你身上 You think I talked you into something.
没有，我们住在一起，我们睡在一起 我们吃在一起 No. We live together, we sleep together, we eat together.
天哪，你不会想让我们看起来 已经结婚了吧，是吗? Jesus, you don't want it to be like we're married, do you?
有什么区别吗? - 你有你自己的住处，那么就有区别 How is it any different? - Because you keep your own apartment.
因为它在那儿，尽管我们可以不去住 我们可以不去管它 It's there. We don't have to go to it, deal with it...
但是它就像一只在水面上漂着的救生筏有了它，我们就知道我们没有结婚 but it's like a free-floating life raft that we know that we're not married.
那套小公寓一个月要400美元，艾尔维！ That little apartment is $400 a month, Alvy.
那地方要400美元一个月? - 是的 That place is $400 a month? - Yes, it is.
里面的那些坏水管和虫子?老天 It's got bad plumbing and bugs. Jesus.
让报税员作为我课税减免的一款 我来替你付好了 My accountant will write it off as a tax deduction. I'll pay for it.
你认为我不够聪明 老是想糊弄我，是吗? You don't think I'm smart enough to be serious about.
别荒唐了 Don't be ridiculous.
那你为什么老是逼着我去修 大学里的那些课程，好像我是个笨蛋似的 Then why are you always pushing me to take college courses like I was dumb?
因为成人教育是件极好的事！ Adult education is a wonderful thing!
你会遇上许多有意思的教授 你知道，那很激励人的 You meet a lot of interesting professors. It's stimulating.
这听起来像是一门好的课吗 《现代美国诗歌》? Does this sound like a good course: "Modern American Poetry"?
噢，看看这个… Or, let's see...
也许我应该选《小说入门》 maybe I should take "Introduction to the Novel. "
只要不选要让你读《裴欧沃夫》 (英格兰诗史)的课就行 Just don't take any course where they make you read Beowulf.
什么? What?
嗨，听着，你认为怎么样? 我们要不要去参加在南汉普敦的聚会? What do you think? Should we go to that party in South Hampton?
不，别傻了，我们还需要别人干吗? No, don't be silly. What do we need other people for?
我们应该马上关灯 开始玩藏"腊肠"之类的游戏 We should just turn out the lights and play hide the "salam" or something.
嗯，我去拿根烟，行吗? Well, I'm going to get a cigarette, okay?
麻烟，对吗?幻想着那会使白种女人 更像比莉·霍利戴(美国黑人爵士女歌手) Grass, right? The illusion that it makes a white woman more like Billie Holiday.
- 你没在做爱时磕过药吗? - 我?没有 - Have you ever made love high? - Me? No.
你知道，如果我用大麻或酒精 那我就会过分出色了 If I have grass or alcohol, I get unbearably wonderful.
难以言表地出色 I get too wonderful for words.
我不明白为什么每次我们做爱 你都要用药来兴奋 I don't know why you have to get high every time we make love.
那让我放松 It relaxes me.
在我们上床之前， 你非得拿人造的药物来放松吗? You have to be artificially relaxed before we can go to bed?
有什么区别吗? What's the difference, anyway?
我要给你来一针喷妥撒钠(麻醉药) 这样你就可以睡过去了 I'll give you a shot of Sodium Pentothal. You can sleep through it.
得了吧，瞧瞧谁在说话！ 是你看了十五年心理医生好吧 Look who's talking! You've been seeing a psychiatrist for 15 years.
你应该吸一些这个 那样你就可以立马摆脱心理医生了 You should smoke some of this. You'd be off the couch in no time.
行了，你不需要这个 - 你要干吗? Come on, you don't need that. - What are you doing?
- 别，艾尔维，求你了！ - 至少这一次你可以不抽 - No, Alvy, please? - You can live without it once.
等一下，我有个好主意 Wait, I got a great idea.
稍等一会儿，我有件小玩意 一件起性的小玩意 Hang in there for a second. I got a little erotic artifact
我从城里带来的，我认为那会棒极了 that I brought up from the city, which I think is going to be perfect.
你看，制造出一点新奥尔良的旧城氛围 There. Create a little old New Orleans essence.
现在我们可以开始干活了 Now we can go about our business...
如果我们愿意的话 甚至都可以来冲相片了 and even develop photographs if we want to.
- 有什么不对劲吗? - 没有，怎么了? - Is something wrong? - No, why?
我不知道，你有点心不在焉 I don't know. It's like you're removed.
不，我还好 No, I'm fine.
真的吗? Really?
我不知道，感觉你好像不在这儿一样 I don't know. You seem sort of distant.
就让我们做吧，行吗? Let's just do it, all right?
只是我的感觉还是什么 你好像没怎么投入感情 Was it my imagination or are you just going through the motions?
艾尔维，你记得我把 画画的本子放哪儿了吗? Alvy, do you remember where I put my drawing pad?
因为你们俩干你们的 我想我还是来画点画好了 Because while you two are doing that, I'm going to do some drawing.
看到没有 那就是我说的"心不在焉"！ That's what I call removed!
唉，你有我的身体 You have my body.
但是，那样感觉不好，我要你的全部！ But I want the whole thing!
但是我需要大麻，你也应该来点 I need grass.
但是你抽大麻让我很沮丧 It ruins it for me if you have grass.
因为，你知道，譬如说，我在演喜剧 如果我从一个磕了药的家伙那里赢得了笑声 I'm like a comedian, so if I get a laugh from a person who's high...
那压根就不作数嘛，你知道 因为他们一直在笑嘛 it doesn't count, 'cause they're always laughing.
你一直那么搞笑吗? Were you always funny?
咳，这是什么?是在采访吗? 我们应该做爱才对嘛 Is this an interview? We're supposed to be making love.
这家伙天生很搞笑 我想他能为你写点什么 This guy is naturally funny. I think he can write for you.
是啊，是啊，咳，小子 他告诉我你很不错 Yeah, yeah. Hey, kid, he tells me you're really good.
那么我来解释下我的表演风格 你会说我乍一看上去… Let me explain how I work. You can tell off the bat...
并不像是个有趣的家伙 不像有些人，你知道 that I don't look like a funny guy like some of the guys.
他们一出场你就知道他们会讲些故事 然后逗得你笑翻在地 You know they're going to tell you their stories, you're going to fall down.
但是我有真正的才能 我的笑料必须非常具有感染力 But I gotta be really talented. Material's got to be sensational for me.
因为我的表演，你知道，很…很… 我讲究某种品味，你知道我的意思吗? I work- I'm kind of classy. Know what I mean?
我来解释一下 比如说，我会用一首歌来开场 Let me explain. I'll open with an opening song.
像这样的音乐开始… The music will start.
我走出来 "这地方看起来真不错" I walk out. Place looks wonderful from here
"你们瞧上去也很棒" You folks look wonderful from here
"看到你们坐在那儿笑容挂在脸上" And seeing you there With a smile on your face
"令我高喊，这就是我的地方" Makes me shout This must be the place
我在半当中猛然停下，然后开始讲笑话 这里我就需要你来给我写点东西了 I stop, and then I open with some jokes. That's where I need you.
比如像这样的，我会说："咳，我才从 加拿大回来，你知道，那儿的人说很多法语" I'll say, "I just got back from Canada. They speak a lot of French.
"我记得的唯一的词是‘黑厕所(法语"圣女贞德"的谐音)’ 意思是洗手间里的灯坏(关)了" The only word to know is John Dark. It means the light's out in the bathroom.
- "噢，我碰到个大块头的伐木工人…" - 天哪，这个家伙可真够戗 - I met a big lumberjack. " - Jesus, this guy's pathetic.
瞧瞧他那副装腔作势的德行 天哪，还真以为自己超可爱呢 Look at him mincing around. Boy, thinks he's real cute.
我都要吐了 You want to throw up.
让我以后都不敢讲我自己的笑话了 If only I had the nerve to do my own jokes.
我不知道自己僵在 脸上的微笑还能保持多久 I don't know how much longer I can keep this smile frozen on my face.
我肯定入错行了，我就知道 I'm in the wrong business. I know it.
可是，亲爱的(法语) "But, cherie...
我该拿这怎么办呢，嗯? what will I do with this, eh?"
他说："噢，玛丽，有时你真让我生气！" He says, "Oh, Marie, sometime you make me so mad!"
他们那样叫着 给我写点这样的东西，你行吗? They scream at that. Write me something like that, will you?
带点法国味道的 你能做吗?嗯，小子? Kind of a French number. Can you do it?
我这是在哪儿? 我一直…我得重新熟悉下环境 Where am I? I have to reorient myself.
这是威斯康星大学，对吗? This is the University of Wisconsin, right?
因为我到大学里表演 总是令我紧张兮兮 Because I'm always tense when I'm playing a college.
我上大学的记录非常糟糕 我上过纽约大学 I have a bad history with colleges. I went to New York University.
我在纽约大学的第一年就被开除了 And I was thrown out of NYU my freshman year...
原因是我期终考 《形而上学(玄学)》时作弊 for cheating on my metaphysics final.
你知道，我偷看进了 坐在我旁边的那小子的心灵 I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me.
我被赶出来后，我妈妈是一个情绪 很容易激动的女人，把自己锁在卫生间里 My mother, an emotionally high-strung woman, locked herself in the bathroom
吞服了过量的麻将牌 and took an overdose of mah-jongg tiles.
那段时间我郁闷异常 就去看心理医生 I was depressed at that time. I was in analysis.
我有了自杀倾向 实际上，我早就已经自杀了 I was suicidal, as a matter of fact, and would have killed myself...
要不是我的心理医生是个严格的 信奉弗洛伊德学说的人 but I was in analysis with a strict Freudian.
他说如果你想自杀，那么你把 你要错过的那些疗程的钱付了先 And if you kill yourself, they make you pay for the sessions you miss.
艾尔维，你太棒了！不开玩笑 Alvy, you were just great. I'm not kidding.
- 这简直…你太优雅了 - 大学里的观众就是棒 College audiences are wonderful.
你知道吗?我认为我也开始越来越多地 理解笑话里所指的东西了 You know what? I think I'm starting to get more of the references, too.
是吗?可是十二点的表演 和九点的表演完全不一样啊 Are you? The 12:00 show is completely different than the 9:00.
噢，我真的非常盼望明天，我是说 那会很棒的，你会见到我的母亲和父亲 I'm looking forward to tomorrow. It'll be nice. You'll meet Mother and Father.
是啊，我知道，他们一看到我就会讨厌我 They'll hate me immediately.
不，我可不这样想，我一点也不认为 他们会讨厌你，恰恰相反 No, I don't think they're going to hate you at all. Contrary.
这是复活节，我们会坐下来一起共进一顿丰盛的晚餐，我想他们会真的很喜欢你的 It's Easter. We'll sit down and eat. I think they'll really like you.
今年的火腿做得不错，妈妈 It's a nice ham this year, Mom.
噢，是的，奶奶一直做得最好 Grammy always does such a good job.
味道真棒 Great sauce.
是的，不同凡响的火腿 It is. It's dynamite ham.
我们去了旧货交换会 We went to the swap meet.
安妮、奶奶、和我 弄来些很不错的画(相)框 Annie, Gram and I. Got some nice picture frames.
我们玩得很愉快 We really had a good time.
安妮告诉我们 你已经看了十五年的心理医生 Ann tells us you've been seeing a psychiatrist for 15 years.
是的，我正取得极大的进展 Yes. I'm making excellent progress.
不久以后，我躺在医生的睡椅上时 就不用再穿紧身束衣啦 Soon, when I lie down on his couch, I won't have to wear the lobster bib.
杜温和我去了停船的内湾 - 我们一整天在那儿修补船体 Duane and I went to the boat basin. - We caulked hulls all day.
看到伦道夫·亨特了 还和往常一样喝得醉醺醺的 And Randolph Hunt was drunk as usual.
那个伦道夫·亨特啊！ 你还记得伦道夫·亨特吗，安妮? That Randolph Hunt! You remember Randy Hunt, Annie.
- 他以前和你在同一个合唱队 - 噢，记得， - He was in the choir with you. - Oh, yes.
真不敢相信这样一家子 I can't believe this family.
安妮的妈妈确实漂亮 Annie's mother is really beautiful.
他们谈论旧货交换会和停船的内湾 And they're talking swap meets and boat basins.
坐在桌子那头的老太太是个 一流的犹太讨厌者 The old lady at the end of the table is a classic Jew-hater.
他们给人感觉是标准的美国人，你知道 身体健壮，好像他们从不生病似的 They really look American, healthy, like they never get sick or anything.
和我的家庭完全不同 两家可以说是油和水互不相容 Nothing like my family. The two are like oil and water.
啊，让他去死吧 谁稀罕他的生意啊? Ah, let him drop dead. Who needs his business?
- 他老婆可有糖尿病啊 - 糖尿病?那可以作为借口吗?糖尿病? - His wife has diabetes. - Diabetes? Is that an excuse?
那男人已经五十岁了 也没有正经工作 The man is 50 years old and doesn't have a substantial job.
那就可以从你合伙人那里偷东西啦? Is that a reason to steal from your partner?
你在说什么啊?你什么都不了解尽瞎扯 You don't know what you're talking about.
乔治，为他辩护！ Defend him!
把这些胸肉放过去 Pass the brisket.
莫·莫斯科维茨，他有冠心病 Mo Moskowitz. He had a coronary.
别瞎说！ You don't say!
你们怎么过假日呢，辛格太太? How do you plan to spend the holidays, Mrs. Singer?
- 我们斋戒 - 斋戒? - We fast. - Fast?
不吃东西，你知道，为了赎罪 No food. You know, to atone for our sins.
赎什么罪?我不明白 What sins? I don't understand.
跟你老实说吧，我们也搞不懂 Neither do we.
艾尔维！
嗨，杜温，你怎么样? Hi, Duane. How's it going?
这是我的屋子 - 哦，是吗? 很不错啊 This is my room. - Oh, yeah? It's terrific.
我能向你说说心里话吗? Can I confess something?
我告诉你这个，是因为你是个艺术家 我想你应该会理解 I tell you this, because, as an artist, I think you'll understand.
有时在夜晚 Sometimes when I'm driving...
我驾着车在公路上 on the road at night...
我看见迎面的两束车前灯朝我过来，很快 I see two headlights coming toward me, fast.
我有种即刻的冲动 想疾速地拐一下方向盘 I have this impulse to turn the wheel quickly...
直直地撞向开过来的车子 head-on into the oncoming car.
我可以设想那爆炸的情景 I can anticipate the explosion.
那玻璃碎裂的声音 The sound of shattering glass.
那四处流淌的汽油所燃烧起的火焰 The flames rising out of the flowing gasoline.
是的 Right.
嗯，我现在得走了，杜温 因为我该回到地球上去了 I have to go now, Duane, because I'm due back on the planet Earth.
- 别太长时间了 - 不会的 Don't let it be so long now.
- 去看看比利叔叔，答应我 - 他很可爱的 - Look up Uncle Billy, promise. - He is adorable.
- 你现在送他们去机场，是吗? - 不，不，杜温可以送 - You'll take them to the airport now? - No. Duane can.
- 我还没喝完呢 - 是的，杜温去吧，我马上回… - I haven't finished my drink. - Yes, Duane is. I'll be right-
你跟踪我，我不敢相信！ You followed me. I can't believe it!
- 我没跟踪你， - 你跟踪我了！ - I didn't follow you. - You followed me!
为什么啊?因为我走在你后面 隔着个街区盯着你?那不叫跟踪 Because I was walking a block behind staring at you? That's not following.
那你说什么是"跟踪"? - 跟踪不是这样的，我这叫盯梢 What's your definition of "following"? - Following is different. I was spying.
你知道你有多么妄想狂吗? Do you realize how paranoid you are?
妄想狂?我看到你了 你用你的双臂揽着另一个家伙 Paranoid? I'm looking at you, and you've got your arms around another guy.
这是最厉害的妄想狂了！ That is the worst kind of paranoid!
天哪，我一开始并不想盯你的梢 我以为会给你个惊喜，在你下课后去接你 I didn't start out spying. I thought I'd surprise you, pick you up after school.
哦，是啊，是你希望我们保持这样 有弹性的关系的，还记得吗?这是你的原话? You wanted to keep the relationship flexible, remember? It's your phrase.
噢，拜托，你要和你的大学教授插上一腿了！ You're having an affair with your college professor!
那个混蛋教什么《西方男人的当代危机》 这都是什么垃圾课程啊，简直难以置信！ That jerk that teaches that crap course, "Contemporary Crisis in Western Man. "
是《俄国文学中的存在主义主题》好吧 你说的真靠谱啊！ "Existential Motifs in Russian Literature. " You're really close.
有啥子区别嘛 反正都是些精神上的自渎 What's the difference? It's all mental masturbation.
噢，是啊，我们终于聊到 你有所了解的题目了！ Now we're getting to a subject you know something about.
咳，别贬低自渎！ 那是和我爱的人做爱 Don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love.
我们没有一腿，他结过婚 只是他认为我比较优雅 We're not having an affair. He's married. He happens to think I'm neat.
"优雅"！你还是十二岁吗? 那是你齐佩瓦瀑布的用词之一 Are you 12 years old? That's one of your Chippewa Falls expressions.
我才不管呢！ Who cares?
接下来他会发现你很热情、你很漂亮，接下来，他把他的手搭在你的屁股上！ Next he'll find you're keen and peachy. Then he'll have his hand on your ass.
自从我跟你提到大卫 你就一直对他充满敌意！ You've had hostility towards David ever since I mentioned him.
- "大卫"?你喊你老师大卫? - 那是他名字 - You call your teacher David? - It's his name.
嗯，听着，这是个好《圣经》里的名字，对吗? 那他叫你什么?拔示巴(大卫王之妻、所罗门王之母)? It's a Biblical name, right? Does he call you Bathsheba?
艾尔维！艾尔维！是你从来不想对我真正负责！ Alvy, you're the one who never wanted to make a real commitment.
你认为我不够聪明 我们上个月才为此争吵过 You don't think I'm smart enough. We had that argument last month...
你不记得那天的事了吗? or don't you remember that day?
- 我回来了！ - 噢，是啊，怎么样? - I'm home! - How'd it go?
感觉很怪，不过她人很好 It was really weird, but she's a very nice woman.
她没让我躺在睡椅上，艾尔维 她让我坐在那儿 I didn't have to lie on the couch. She had me sitting up.
然后我告诉她我的家庭 我对男人的感觉 I told her about the family and my feelings towards men...
还有我和我弟弟的关系 and my relationship with my brother.
然后她提到了"阴茎羡慕" 你知道那是什么吗? Then she mentioned penis envy. Do you know about that?
我?我是为数不多的深受其害的男性之一 所以，你知道…你接着说，我很感兴趣 I'm one of the few males who suffers from that. Go on.
她说我对自己经常想结婚生子的冲动 怀有很深的负罪感 She said I was guilty about my impulses towards marriage and children.
然后我就记起了当我还是小孩时 有一次无意中撞见我父母在做爱 I remembered, when I was a kid, I accidentally saw my parents making love.
真的吗?所有这些在第一个小时里就发生了吗? 真太不可思议了！ All this happened the first hour? That's amazing.
我看了十五年心理医生了 你知道，我没有这样的经历 I've been going for 15 years. I don't have nothing like that.
我告诉她我的梦，然后我就哭了 I told her my dream, and then I cried.
你哭了?我一次都没哭过 真是太奇妙了！ You cried. I've never once cried. That's fantastic to me.
我呜咽，我坐在那儿呜呜咽咽 I whine. I sit and I whine.
艾尔维，在我的梦里，弗兰克·辛纳特拉 拿着个枕头压在我脸上 In my dream, Frank Sinatra is holding this pillow across my face...
我透不过气来 and I can't breathe.
- 辛纳特拉? - 是的，他想闷死我 He's strangling me.
别开玩笑了，噢对了，是的，他是个歌手 你也是个歌手，你知道，这就对了 Sure, because he's a singer, and you're a singer. It's perfect.
你试图闷死你自己，这就很说得通了 You're trying to suffocate yourself. It makes perfect sense.
这是精神分析的某种完美诠释 That's a perfect analytic insight.
她说那是你，你的名字艾尔维·辛格 She said your name was Alvy Singer.
- 你什么意思，我? - 是啊，是啊，你 - What do you mean, me? - Yeah, you.
因为在梦里，我打碎了辛纳特拉的眼镜 Because in the dream, I break Sinatra's glasses.
辛纳特拉戴…你刚才没说辛纳特拉戴眼镜 那么你是说我想闷死你? You never said Sinatra had glasses. Are you saying I'm suffocating you?
噢，老天，艾尔维 我对他做了件真正可怕的事 God, I did this really terrible thing to him...
因为他在我梦里演唱时 他的声音高得离奇 because then when he sang, it was in this real high-pitch voice.
医生说什么? - 她说我或许应该一周去看五次 What'd the doctor say? - I should come five times a week.
你知道吗?我一点也不介意去做精神分析 唯一的问题是，这会不会改变我的妻子? I don't think I mind analysis at all. The question is, will it change my wife?
- 会不会改变你的妻子? - 会不会改变我的生活? - Will it change your wife? - Will it change my life?
但你说的是"会不会改变我的妻子" - 不，我说的是"会不会改变我的生活" But you said "wife. " - No, I said "life. "
不，你说"会不会改变…"妻子 - "生活"！我说的是"生活"！ No, you said "wife. " - "Life!" I said "life. "
她说的是"会不会改变我的妻子"，你们都听到的 因为你们刚才也在这儿，我没不正常吧 She said "wife. " You heard that, because you were there. I'm not crazy.
艾尔维，然后我告诉她我认为 你从来没把我认真地当回事儿 Then I told her I didn't think you'd ever take me seriously
因为你认为我不够聪明 because you don't think I'm smart enough.
你为什么老是这样说? 因为我鼓励你去修成人教育课程? Why do you bring that up? Because I encourage you to take adult education?
我认为那是件极好的事 你会遇上许多很好的、有意思的教授 It's a wonderful thing. You meet wonderful, interesting professors.
成人教育都是废物垃圾！大学教授 都是超级骗子！你怎么受得了的嘛！ Adult education is junk. The professors are phony. How can you do it?
我不管你怎么说大卫, 她是个很好的老师 I don't care what you say about David. He's a fine teacher.
你干吗要到处跟踪我?真是的！ And why are you following me around?
我在想我们的关系是不是该到此为止了！ We should call this relationship quits.
很好，很好，太棒了！ 你看，我不知道我哪边做错了 That's fine. That's great. I don't know what I did wrong.
不知怎么的，她就对我冷了下来，是因为我做错什么了吗? Somewhere she cooled off to me. Is it something that I did?
你根本没做错什么 大家都这样子的，爱会消退 It's never something you do. That's how people are. Love fades.
爱会消退 天哪，这真是个令人沮丧的想法 Love fades. God, that's a depressing thought.
我想问你个问题 先别急着走 I have to ask you a question. Don't go any further.
你和你妻子在床上时，她需不需要某种人造的东西来刺激一下 With your wife, in bed, does she need some kind of artificial stimulation
譬如说大麻? like marijuana?
我们用一个大的震荡蛋 We use a large vibrating egg.
大的震荡蛋 A large vibrating egg.
得，我去问个精神病人 也可以得到这样的答案，天哪！ I ask a psychopath, I get that kind of answer. Jesus!
这两位，你们看上去像是很幸福的一对 You look like a very happy couple.
- 是吗? - 是啊 - Are you? - Yeah.
那么你们是怎么做到的? How do you account for it?
嗯，我很浅薄和空洞 我没什么想法 I'm very shallow and empty, and I have no ideas...
也说不出啥道道 and nothing interesting to say.
- 我跟她完全一样 - 我明白了 - I'm exactly the same way. - I see.
非常有意思 这么说你们找对某种路子了，是吗? That's interesting. So you've managed to work out something?
是的 Right.
那么，非常感谢你们跟我谈话 Thanks for talking to me.
你知道，甚至在我小的时候，我就总是 找错女人，我想我的问题就出在这里 Even as a kid, I went for the wrong women. I think that's my problem.
当我妈妈带我去看《白雪公主》 When my mother took me to see Snow White...
人人都爱上了白雪公主 而我却对刻毒的皇后一见倾心 everyone fell in love with Snow White, and I fell for the wicked queen.
- 我们再也不会有任何快乐了 - 你怎么能这样说? - We never have any fun anymore. - How can you say that?
为什么不能? 你总是寄希望于我改善自己 Why not? You're always leaning on me to improve myself.
你又心烦了，你一定又来例假了 You're upset. You must be getting your period.
我没有例假！我是个卡通人物 我就不能偶尔心烦一下吗? I don't get a period. I'm a cartoon character. Can't I be upset sometimes?
麦克斯，你能不能把安妮忘了我认识很多女人你可以约会 Max, forget about Annie. I know lots of women you can date.
我不想跟任何其他女人出去约会 I don't want to go out with other women.
麦克斯，我给你介绍个女孩 你会喜欢她的 Max, I've got a girl for you. You are going to love her.
她是《滚石》杂志的记者 She's a reporter for Rolling Stone.
我想到这儿来看 玛哈利师(印度超在禅定派玄学士)的人 There are more people here to see the Maharishi
比去看迪伦(鲍勃·迪伦) 演唱会的人还多 than there were to see the Dylan concert.
我报道了那场迪伦演唱会 简直酷毙了 I covered the Dylan concert, which gave me chills.
特别是当他唱道："她像女人一般占有" Especially when he sang, "She takes just like a woman
她做爱时像个女人 and she makes love just like a woman.
是的，她是的 Yes, she does.
她痛楚时像个女人 And she aches just like a woman...
但是她哭泣时却像个小女孩 but she breaks just like a little girl. "
除了这个 我想我报道过的最有魅力的事件是 Up to that, the most charismatic event I covered...
米克(米克·贾格尔)过生日时 "滚石"乐队在麦迪逊广场花园的那场表演 was Mick's birthday when the Stones played Madison Square Garden.
是的，很棒，的确很棒 That's just great.
你喜欢迪伦吗? You catch Dylan?
我?没有，我没能赶上那晚他的… 我的浣熊得了肝炎 No, I couldn't make it. My raccoon had hepatitis.
你养浣熊? You have a raccoon?
有几只 A few.
唯一能形容这个的词是"超妙" The only word for this is "transplendent. "
- 超妙！ - 我可以想个其它的词 - It's transplendent. - I can think of another word.
他是上帝！我是说，这个人是上帝！ He's God. I mean, this man is God.
他有数百万的信徒 他们从世界各地虔诚地一路赶过来 He's got millions of followers, who would crawl across the world
为的只是触摸一下他那外袍的下摆 just to touch the hem of his garment.
真的吗?那它的下摆肯定巨大无比 It must be a tremendous hem.
- 我自己是蔷薇十字会员 - 是吗? - I'm a Rosicrucian myself. - Are you?
我不太能接受那些在《大众机械》 杂志上打出广告的宗教 I can't get with any religion that advertises in Popular Mechanics. Look.
快看！上帝从男洗手间出来了 There's God coming out of the men's room.
简直无法置信地超妙！ It's unbelievably transplendent!
我参加了"滚石"乐队在艾尔塔蒙特的演唱会，那次有个家伙被杀了，你还记得吗? I was at the Stones' concert when they killed that guy. Remember?
哦，是吗?我有次去听艾利斯·库珀 Were you? I was at an Alice Cooper thing...
现场有六个人因反应剧烈 而被送进了急救医院 where six people were rushed to the hospital with bad vibes.
我希望你别介意 我那么长时间才来(高潮) I hope you don't mind that I took so long to finish.
我?不会，别傻了 Me? No. Don't be silly.
你知道，我的下巴开始慢慢恢复知觉了 I'm starting to get some feeling back in my jaw now.
跟你做爱真是种 卡夫卡式(怪诞、超现实)的体验 Sex with you is really a Kafkaesque experience.
噢，谢谢 Thank you.
我那样说是赞赏的意思 I mean that as a compliment.
我认为性高潮被赋予了过重的负担，你知道 I think there's too much burden placed on the orgasm...
好像它是用来填补生活中的所有空白似的 to make up for empty areas in life.
那是谁说的? Who said that?
我不知道，我想也许是列奥泊德和勒布说的 (犹太同性恋青少年、高智商杀人犯) I don't know. I think it may have been Leopold and Loeb.
喂！ Hello.
呃，没有，怎么啦? No. What's the matter?
怎么?你听上去很糟 You sound terrible.
没有，什么…好的，我… No, what- Sure, I-
什么…什么紧急情况? What kind of emergency?
不，你呆在那儿，你呆在那儿！ 现在我马上赶过来 No, stay there. I'll come over right now.
就呆在那儿，我立刻过去 Just stay there. I'll come right over.
是我，开门，你怎么样? It's me. Open up. Are you okay?
有什么事?你还好吧? What's the matter? Are you all right?
卫生间里有个蜘蛛 There's a spider in the bathroom.
- 什么? - 卫生间里有个大个的、黑色的蜘蛛 - What? - There's a big spider in the bathroom.
你凌晨三点把我叫到这儿 就因为在卫生间里有个蜘蛛? You got me here at 3:00 a. m. 'cause a spider's in the bathroom?
噢，我的天哪！你知道我对虫子的反应 那东西在卫生间到处乱爬，我根本睡不着觉 You know how I am about insects. I can't sleep with that thing crawling around.
杀死它！看在上帝的份… 你究竟怎么了嘛！ Kill it! What's wrong with you?
- 你屋里有没有"雷达"罐? - 没有， Don't you have Raid in the house?
我跟你讲过千百遍了 你一定要时时备足杀虫喷雾剂 I told you a thousand times to keep a lot of insect spray.
- 你不知道有什么东西会爬出来 - 我知道，我知道 - You never know who will crawl over. - I know.
还有急救包和灭火器 And a first aid kit and fire extinguisher.
天哪！行了 给我本杂志，因为我有点累了 Give me a magazine, 'cause I'm a little tired.
你知道，你取笑我，你嘲笑我 可是我却时刻准备为你做任何事情 You make fun of me, but I'm prepared for anything.
在紧急情况下，像海啸、地震 An emergency, a tidal wave, an earthquake.
咳，这是什么?你去听摇滚音乐会啦? What is this? Did you go to a rock concert?
是的 Yeah.
哦，真的吗?你…你喜欢吗? Really? How'd you like it?
那怎…我是说，那过瘾吗? 有没有获得完全的"过瘾感"?还是… Was it heavy? Did it achieve total "heavyosity"?
那确实很棒！ It was just great!
是吗?我有了个奇妙的主意，为什么你不喊这个带你去听摇滚的家伙?我们给他打电话 I've got an idea. Call the guy who took you to the rock concert...
然后他可以过来杀掉蜘蛛 你知道，这… and he can come and kill the spider.
我找的是你 你想帮我还是不帮?嗯?给你 I called you. You want to help me or not?
这是什么?从什么时候开始你阅读起 《全国评论》来啦?你现在变成什么人啦? Since when do you read the National Review? What are you turning into?
那是我想了解各方面的观点 I like to get all points of view.
太棒了！那你为什么不干脆喊 威廉·巴克利(保守派记者)来杀掉蜘蛛 Wonderful. Get William F. Buckley to kill the spider.
艾尔维！你干吗那么敌视我?你知道吗? You're a little hostile, you know that?
还有，你看上去很瘦也很疲惫 Not only that, you look thin and tired.
哈，现在是凌晨三点！ 你把我从床上拽了起来 It's 3:00 in the morning. You got me out of bed.
我跑了过来，因为我叫不到出租 因为你说你有紧急情况 I ran over. I couldn't get a taxi. You said it was an emergency.
我没有…我跑上了楼梯 I ran up the stairs.
昨晚早些时候，我还是很有吸引力的 I was more attractive when the evening began.
告诉我，你是…你现在喜欢上 右翼摇滚明星啦?那可能吗? Are you going with a right-wing rock-and-roll star?
你要不要来一杯巧克力奶? Would you like a glass of chocolate milk?
咳，我是什么人?你儿子?你什么意思?我来是 - 我有很好的巧克力奶， What am I, your son? I came over for - I've got the good chocolate.
好的，蜘蛛在哪儿?在卫生间? - 在卫生间 Where's the spider? - It's in the bathroom.
咳，别拍得稀烂！打死以后 用水冲下抽水马桶，行吗?多冲两次！ Don't squish it. After it's dead, flush it down the toilet, okay?
亲爱的，我从三十岁起 就开始杀蜘蛛了，放心了吗? I've been killing spiders since I was 30. Okay?
那是只非常大的蜘蛛 是的，有大麻烦了，有两个蜘蛛 It's a very big spider. A lot of trouble. There's two of 'em.
是的，我没料到它会有那么大 但是它是只特大蜘蛛 I didn't think it was that big, but it's a major spider.
你有扫帚吗，或是雪铲之类 - 噢，我把它留在你房里了，对不起 You got a broom or snow shovel? - I left it at your house. I'm sorry.
好吧，我来用这个 - 你要干吗?你用我的… What are you doing?
亲爱的，在你的卫生间里有个蜘蛛 它的尺寸有别克车那么大 There's a spider in your bathroom the size of a Buick.
- 咳，这是什么?你用黑肥皂? - 用在脸上皮肤的 - You got black soap? - It's for my complexion.
怎么?你加入 "滑稽说唱团(涂黑脸讲笑话)"啦?天哪！ Are you joining a minstrel show?
不要担心！ Don't worry.
我杀掉了，两个都杀掉了 你怎么了? I did it. I killed them both. What's the matter?
你为什么难过?你想让我抓住它们 把它们养起来? What are you sad about? Did you want me to capture and rehabilitate 'em?
- 不要走，行吗? - 你什么意思?"不要走"? - Don't go, please. - What do you mean?
怎么啦?你还担心会有白蚁? What's the matter? Are you expecting termites?
怎么了嘛? What's the matter?
我不知道，我想你 I don't know. I miss you.
- 天哪！真的? - 噢，是的 Jesus! Really?
- 艾尔维? - 什么? - Alvy? - What?
我打电话给你的时候 你屋里有什么人吗? Was there somebody in your room when I called you?
- 你什么意思? - 我的意思是有没有其他…我想我听到了声音 - What do you mean? - I mean, I thought I heard a voice.
我开着收音机 对不起，是电视，我开着电视 I had the radio on. I'm sorry, it was the television.
艾尔维，我们别再分手了 我不想分开 Let's never break up again. I don't want to be apart.
噢，好的，我想我们都已经足够成熟 来应付这样的事了 I think we're both much too mature for something like that.
住在一起不是很好嘛，不是吗? Living together hasn't been so bad, has it?
我的感觉是很好，很棒，你知道吗? For me it's been terrific. You know?
比我的前两次婚姻好 Better than either of my marriages.
因为你身上有种不同的东西 我不知道那是什么，但是感觉很好， There's something different about you. I don't know what, but it's great.
你知道，我在想要是你愿意，也许我 可以帮你得到更多的快乐，你知道吗? I think, if you let me, I could help you have more fun.
我是说我知道那很难，是的 I know it's hard. Yeah.
艾尔维，这个周末我们出去好不好? What if we go away this weekend?
为什么我们不带上罗伯 我们三个一起开车去布鲁克林? Why don't we get Rob, and the three of us would drive into Brooklyn?
你知道，我们可以带着你看看我们的老家 你会觉得很好玩的，你认为呢? We could show you the old neighborhood. That'd be fun for you.
好的，我很乐意 Yeah, I'd love it.
噢，我的天，今天太棒了！ God, it's a great day!
咳，你看着点路好吗?看着点路！ 你会彻底毁了这车的！ Watch the road! You'll total the car!
咳，你知道吗? 我以前从没去过布鲁克林 I've never been to Brooklyn.
- 我等不及了，想去看看我们的老家 - 是啊，老家会感觉很棒的 - I can't wait to see the neighborhood. - The neighborhood will be great.
- 我们还能带她看看校园操场 - 对，我那时是个运动能手，告诉她，麦克斯！ - We could show her the schoolyard. - I was a great athlete. Tell her.
- 我是最棒的，我是全能选手 - 是的，我记得的 I was all-schoolyard.
他是全能选手，有一次有人扔给他 一只橄榄球，他居然想试着运球 They threw him a football once. He tried to dribble it.
是的，那时我丢掉不少眼镜 I used to lose my glasses a lot.
噢，看！快看！那是我家的老房子 那是我住过的地方 Look! That's my old house. That's where I used to live.
我的老天！ Holy cow!
你很幸运，麦克斯，我以前住过的地方 现在成了一家色情用品商店 You're lucky. Where I used to live is now a pornographic equipment store.
我有一些很美好的回忆在这儿 I had some very good memories there.
什么样的美好回忆，麦克斯? 你的父母亲总是吵个不停 What good memories, your mother and father fighting all the time?
不错，而且总是为些最荒唐可笑的事情 And over the most ridiculous things.
你把清洁房间的女仆开除啦? - 她在偷东西！ You fired the cleaning woman? - She was stealing!
但是她是黑人 - 那又怎么样? But she's colored.
黑人已经有够多的麻烦了！ The colored have enough trouble!
她在搜我的钱包！ - 他们已经受到太多的迫害！ She was going through my purse. - They're persecuted enough.
谁迫害他们啦?她偷东西！ - 是啊，那又怎么样?我们还经得起偷 Who's persecuting? She stole! - So? We can afford it.
我们怎么经得起偷啦?以你的薪水? 要是她越偷越多怎么办? How can we afford it, on your pay? What if she steals more?
她是个从哈莱姆区来的黑人妇女 她没有钱！ She's a colored woman from Harlem. She has no money.
她有权偷我们的东西！ 毕竟要是她不偷我们，她还能去偷谁嘛！ She has a right to steal from us. Who can she steal from if not from us?
你们俩都疯了！ - 他们听不见你说的，麦克斯 You're both crazy. - They can't hear you.
列奥，我嫁给了个傻瓜！ Leo, I married a fool!
咳，麦克斯，那是什么? What's that?
那是1945年欢迎我的表兄 赫比回家的聚会 That's the welcome home party, 1945, for my cousin Herbie.
瞧那儿，那边那个 那是乔伊·尼克尔斯 Look. That over there is Joey Nichols.
他是我父亲的朋友 当我还是小孩时，他总是来烦我 He was my father's friend. He was always bothering me when I was a kid.
乔伊·尼克尔斯 看到没有?镍扣！ Joey Nichols. See? Nickels.
看到没有?镍扣！ 你瞧，五分镍币！ See? Nickels. You see? Nickels.
你可以一直记住我的名字 只要想起乔伊·五分镍币 You can always remember my name. Just think of Joey Five-Cents.
那就是我，乔伊·五分镍币！ That's me. Joey Five-Cents.
真是个混蛋啊！ What an asshole.
最让我好笑的是我母亲的姐姐，泰茜 The one who killed me the most was my mother's sister, Tessie.
我一直是几个姐妹当中最有见识的 I was always the sister with good common sense...
而泰茜一直是最有个性的 but Tessie was always the one with personality.
在她年轻的时候 他们都想和泰茜结婚 When she was younger, they all wanted to marry Tessie.
你相信吗，麦克斯? 泰茜·莫斯科维茨有个性? Do you believe Tessie had the personality?
她是犹太人区受到关注的人物，毫无疑问 - 她从前可是个大美人 She's the life of the ghetto no doubt. - She was once a great beauty.
泰茜，他们说你是姐妹中最有个性的 Tessie, they say you were the sister with personality.
我以前是个大美人！ I was a great beauty!
这样的个性是如何形成的呀? - 我很有魅力 How did this personality come about? - I was very charming.
有许多男人对你有兴趣吗? There were many men interested in you?
噢，我会跳非常活泼的舞蹈 I was quite a lively dancer.
这真的很难相信 It's very hard to believe.
嗯，我今天玩得很开心，你知道吗? 这真是个很好的方式度过我的生日， I had a really good day. It was a fine way to spend my birthday.
啊，你的生日是在明天 - 是的，但是已经够近了 - Your birthday isn't until tomorrow. - But it's real close.
- 是的，但是午夜前你得不到礼物 - 噢，见鬼 But no presents until midnight.
这是…嗯?
生日快乐！ Happy birthday.
这是什么?这是礼物吗? 你开玩笑吧? What is this? Is this a present? Are you kidding?
是啊，咳，你为什么不试着穿上? Yeah. Why don't you try it on?
这更像是送给你的礼物，是的，但是… - 试试，它可使我们的性生活延长十年 This is more like a present for you. - It'll add ten years to our sex life.
啊哈，是啊，别做梦了 Yeah. Forget it.
这才是真正的礼物 Here's a real present.
- 噢，是吗?这又是什么?让我看看 - 打开看看 - What is this anyway? - Check it out.
噢，天哪！你知道我想要这个 天哪，太棒了！天哪！ You knew I wanted this. God, it's terrific!
那就戴上手表，还有那玩意儿 那就完美了 Just put on the watch and that thing. It'll be perfect.
仿佛 Seems like
旧时 Old times
与你 Having you
同行 To walk with
仿佛 Seems like
旧时 Old times
与你同行 Having you to walk with
依然令我心动 And it's still a thrill
将我的双臂 Just to have my arms
与你相拥 Around you
依然令我心动 Still the thrill
在那一天 That it was the day
我发现你 I found you
仿佛 Seems like
旧时 Old times
相约晚餐鲜花束束 Dinner dates and flowers
旧时 Old times
彻夜无眠 Staying up all hours
让梦想成真 Making dreams come true
重温往日 Doing things we used
情怀 To do
仿佛 Seems like
旧时 Old times
和你 Here with
在一起 You
谢谢！ Thank you.
你唱得很有感染力 You were sensational.
我是说，你知道，我跟你说过 如果你坚持下去，你会成功的… I told you if you stuck to it, you would be great and-
你知道，你唱得非常具有感染力 You were sensational.
噢，是啊，艾尔维 我是说他们都是很棒的观众 Yeah, they were a terrific audience.
我是说，你知道，那让我真的很放松 因为我可以…呃? It makes it easy for me, because I can be-
- 抱歉打扰了，嗨，我是托尼·雷西 - 噢，你好！ Excuse me. Hi, I'm Tony Lacey.
- 我们只是想过来说一下，我们真的非常 欣赏你的表演 - 是吗?真的吗?噢！ - We wanted to say we enjoyed your set. - Yeah? Really?
我认为唱的很有乐感，我非常喜欢 I thought it was very musical. I liked it a lot.
那真太好了，天哪，非常感谢！ That's really nice. Thanks a lot.
你…你灌唱片吗?你有签约吗? Are you recording? Are you with any label?
我?没有，还没有 Me? No, not at all.
那么如果你有时间的话 我想找个机会跟你谈谈这个 I'd like to talk to you about that sometime if you get a chance.
或许可以进行合作 Possibly working together.
噢，那太好了，噢，对了，这是艾尔维·辛格 你认识艾尔维吗?这是托尼·雷西 That's nice. This is Alvy Singer. Do you know Alvy?
不，我不认识，但是我知道你的作品 我非常喜欢你的表演 I don't, but I know your work. I'm a big fan of yours.
- 非常感谢，认识你很高兴 - 这位是肖恩，还有鲍勃和佩特罗尼娅 This is Shawn, Bob and Petronia.
我们要回"皮埃尔饭店" 我们住在"皮埃尔饭店" We're going back to the Pierre...
我们要去见杰克(尼克尔森)和安杰丽卡(休斯顿) 大家一起喝一杯 and we're going to meet Jack and Angelica for a drink.
如果你们愿意加入，我们非常欢迎 If you'd like to come, we'd love to have you.
我们可以一起坐下来聊聊 没什么，没什么大事 We can sit and talk. Not a big deal.
只是放松一下，会很醇熟的 Just relax, be very mellow.
记不记得我们还有那事儿? Remember we had that thing?
什么事? What thing?
你不记得我们讨论过的那件事? 我们在… Remember we discussed that thing?
- 那件事? - 对，我们讨…
噢，那件事！噢，那件事…对…对 Oh, the thing! Oh, the thing. Yeah.
噢，那么如果你们不方便 不能去，那也没事儿 Well, if it's inconvenient, that's fine, too.
我们换个时间再谈，或许你们会去西海岸(洛杉矶)，我们可以在那儿相见聚一聚 We'll do it another time. If you're on the coast, we'll get together there.
- 你唱得真不错，我真的很欣赏 - 噢，天哪， It was a wonderful set. I really enjoyed it.
- 很高兴遇见你们，晚安！ - 再见，再见！ Nice to have met you. Good night.
你怎么了? 你想参加他们的聚会? What's the matter? You want to go to that party?
我不知道，我想或许会很好玩 I don't know. I thought it might be fun.
你知道我的意思 结识些新朋友也不错啊 It would be nice to meet some new people.
我想我过不了一个醇熟的夜晚，因为我对醇熟的反应不怎么好，你知道 I don't think I could take a mellow evening. I don't respond well to mellow.
如果我太醇熟了 那我会因为太熟了而烂掉的 If I get too mellow, I ripen and rot.
- 你知道，那对我不… - 行了，行了， - It's not good for my- - All right.
你不想去参加聚会 那么你想干点什么呢? You don't want to go to the party. What do you want to do?
(《悲伤和怜悯》) 犹太战争狂人和巴黎的大财阀们
企图裹挟着他们的金银财宝逃走
那天的布鲁克林之行是我所记得的 最后一天真正快乐的时光 That day in Brooklyn was the last day I remember having a good time.
- 我们之间再也没有了欢笑，这就是问题 - 我情绪不稳，经常闷闷不乐 - We never have any laughs anymore. - I've been moody and dissatisfied.
你们经常睡在一起吗? - 你们经常做爱吗? How often do you sleep together? - Do you have sex often?
几乎很少，可能一周三次吧 Hardly ever. Maybe three times a week.
非常频繁！我要说一周有三次 可是好像隔个一夜，艾尔维就想要 Constantly. I'd say three times a week. Like the other night, Alvy wanted sex.
她过了一夜就不愿意再和我睡在一起了 She would not sleep with me the other night.
不知道，要是六个月前我可能还会顺着他，只是为了让他高兴 I don't know. Six months ago I would have done it just to please him.
我试了各种办法，你知道 I tried everything.
我放上轻柔的音乐，还有我的红灯泡 I put on soft music and my red light bulb.
有意思的是…我是说自从来和你交谈以后 我觉得我应该对自己的感情负责 Since our discussions here, I feel I have a right to my own feelings.
我想你可能会感到高兴 因为我现在变得有主见了 I think you would have been happy, because I really asserted myself.
最让人难以置信的是 我付钱让她去看心理医生 The incredible thing is, I'm paying for her analysis...
她进展顺利 而我却快完蛋了 she's making progress, and I'm getting screwed.
但是我不知道，我是说我深感内疚 因为是艾尔维出的钱让我来看的 I feel so guilty, because Alvy is paying for it.
所以说我真的会很内疚 要是我不和他睡在一起的话 So I feel guilty if I don't sleep with him.
但是如果我和他睡在一起 那又好像是违背了我自己的感情 But if I do sleep with him, it's like I'm going against my own feelings.
她有了进展，可我没任何进展 - 我不知道，我不可能赢 I'm not making any progress. - I can't win.
有时我会想我还不如干脆找个女的住在一起 Sometimes I think I should live with a woman
哇噢，我不相信！ 你是说你们两个从没吸过可卡因? I don't believe it. You guys have never snorted coke?
嗯，我一直想试试，你知道 但是艾尔维总是强烈反对 I always wanted to try, but Alvy's very down on it.
别怪我好吧！我可不愿意 把一大包白粉填进我的鼻子 Don't put it on me. I don't want to put a wad of white powder in my nose.
因为鼻子里有粘膜 There's the nasal membrane.
你从不想尝试新鲜的东西，艾尔维 - 你怎么能这样说? You never want to try anything new. - How can you say that?
我有一次提出，你、我、还有你表演班上的那个女孩，我们三个睡在一起 I said you, I and that girl from acting class should sleep together.
- 那太恶心了！ - 我知道那很恶心，但那很新鲜 - That's sick. - I know it's sick, but it's new.
- 你可没说新鲜的东西不会令人恶心 - 快过来试试，艾尔维！ - You didn't say it couldn't be sick. - Come on, Alvy.
让你的身体来爽一把，试试，快过来！ - 是的，快，会很有趣的 Do your body a favor. Try it. - It'll be fun.
我确信那很有趣，因为印加人吸那东西 百万印加人灰飞烟灭，都成了笑话 I'm sure it's fun, 'cause the Incas did it. They were a million laughs.
艾尔维，快点！给你自己增加点体验 你不是想写作吗，为什么不试试? For your own experience. You want to write. Why not?
这货很棒，艾尔维，我的一个朋友 才从加利福尼亚搞回来的 It's great stuff, Alvy. A friend just brought it in from California.
噢，你们知道吗…我还没告诉你们 我们下星期去加利福尼亚 I didn't tell you. We're going to California next week.
让我感到特兴奋，你可以想象，(反话) It's really a thrill, as you know.
我听从了我经纪人的建议，我了结了这里的一切，准备去那儿上电视上露露脸 On my agent's advice, I sold out and am going to do a TV appearance.
不，根本不是这么回事 艾尔维是去颁奖，在电视上 That's not it at all. Alvy's giving an award on TV.
天哪，你这样说好像 那是件见不得人的事似的 You act like you're violating a moral issue.
那太诈唬了，而且我们还得在圣诞期间离开纽约，这最让我受不了了 It's so phony. We have to leave New York during Christmas. It kills me.
艾尔维，你听着，你到加利福尼亚后有没有可能给我搞些可卡因带回来? Listen, while you're in California, could you score some coke for me?
当然，当然，乐意效劳，我只要把我的鞋后跟掏空，放在里面就行了 Sure, be glad to. I'll just put it in the hollow heel on my boot.
这玩意多少钱? - 大概2000美元一盎司 How much is this stuff? - About $2,000 an ounce.
真的吗?到底有什么过瘾的? 因为我从没… Really? And what is the kick of it?
祝你圣诞快乐
祝你圣诞快乐、新年幸福
在我搬到这儿来之前 从来没有这样放松过，麦克斯 I've never been so relaxed as I have been since I moved out here.
我要让你看看我的房子，我住在休·海弗纳 (《花花公子》老板)隔壁， 麦克斯他允许我用他的水流按摩浴缸 I want you to see my house. I live next to Hugh Hefner.
还有女人，麦克斯，她们都和《花花公子》女郎一样，所不同的是她们的手脚都会动 And the women are like in Playboy, but they can move their arms and legs.
我无法相信这真的是贝弗莉山庄吗 I can't get over that this is really Beverly Hills.
是啊，这儿的建筑风格可真够一致的哈? 法国式挨着西班牙式 The architecture is really consistent. There's French next to Spanish
西班牙式挨着都铎(英国)式 都铎式挨着日本式 next to Tudor next to Japanese.
天哪，这儿真干净！ It's so clean out here.
那是因为这里的人不扔垃圾 他们把垃圾都整到电视节目里了 Because they don't throw garbage away. They make it into TV shows.
得了吧，麦克斯！现在是圣诞节 - 你们能相信这儿像过圣诞节吗? - Give us a break. It's Christmas. - Can you believe this is Christmas?
- 你知道，纽约刚下过雪自然是白茫茫一片的 - 真的吗? It was snowing and really gray in New York.
太好了，是的 圣诞老人要被晒得中暑了 Nice. Santa Claus will have sun stroke.
麦克斯，这儿没有犯罪，没有抢劫 Max, there's no crime, there's no mugging.
这里没有经济上的犯罪，你知道 There's no economic crime...
但是这里有各种典礼 还有宗教式的膜拜，这些都够谋杀人的 but there's ritual, religious cult murders.
这里还有麦芽杀手 There's wheat-germ killers out here.
既然你们已经在这儿了 我想带你去看看我的电视节目 While you're out here, I want you to see my TV show.
还有，我们受邀参加 一个大型的圣诞聚会 And we're invited to a big Christmas party.
铭记基督是我们的救世主圣诞是他的出生日
他会拯救我们于撒旦的魔掌 当我们误入迷途时
瞧这儿，查理，这里给我一个大笑声 Charlie, give me a good laugh here.
跟踪的豪华轿车抛锚啦?
再大点！ A little bigger.
麦克斯，你没意识到这有多不道德吗? Do you realize how immoral this all is?
麦克斯，我的这个系列很热门的 I've got a hit series.
是的，我知道 但你这是在加进去假的笑声啊 But you're adding fake laughs.
给我一个很大的笑声，查理 Give me a tremendous laugh here.
我们这是在观众面前的现场表演 We do the show live in front of an audience.
是的，可是没人笑啊 因为你的笑话一点也不可笑 But nobody laughs, because the jokes aren't funny.
对啊，所以说这机器作用不凡哪 That's why this machine is dynamite.
你最好躺下来 你在阳光下晒了太长时间了
这里给我点适中的咯咯笑声 Give me a medium chuckle here...
接着是热烈的掌声 and then a big hand.
这机子上有嘘声没? Is there booing on that?
噢，麦克斯，我感到不太舒服 - 我们正打算撮合你和我表妹德洛丽丝呢 I don't feel well.
你怎么了? - 我不知道，我只是感到很晕 What's the matter? - I got very dizzy.
我感到头晕，麦克斯 - 那你坐下， I feel dizzy. - Sit down.
噢，上帝！ Jesus.
你感觉怎样? - 我不知道，我是说… You all right?
你想躺下吗? - 不，我一上午都感到有点反胃，只是现在 You want to lie down? No. My stomach felt queasy all morning.
要不要喝点姜汁汽水? How about a ginger ale?
噢，麦克斯，不，也许我最好躺下 No. Maybe I'd better lie down.
你为什么不试着吃点这个? 这只是鸡肉 Try to get some of this down. It's just plain chicken.
不，我吃不下这个，我感到恶心 No, I can't eat this. I'm nauseous.
你能不能给我点什么药 好让我熬过下面两个小时 If you could get me something to get me through the next two hours.
因为我必须赶去伯班克(洛杉矶郊县) 给一个电视节目颁奖 I have to go to Burbank and give out an award on a TV show.
但是实际上你没有什么不对劲的 至少我看不出来 There's nothing wrong with you as far as I can tell.
我是说，你没有发烧 也没有任何严重的症状 You have no fever, no symptoms of anything serious.
你没有吃过猪肉或者海鲜 - 对不起，抱歉，医生 You haven't eaten pork or shellfish. - Excuse me. I'm sorry, Doctor.
艾尔维，我给节目组打了电话 他们说现在没事了，他们找了个替换的人 Alvy, that was the show. Everything is fine. They found a replacement.
所以他们不用你来录带子了 They're going to tape without you.
噢，天哪，那么我上不了电视啦? Jesus! Now I don't get to do the TV show?
- 是的，我说，医生，我很担心… - 天哪！
我刚才说了，我找不出他这样子的理由 - 一切都正常吗? I can't find any reason for this. - Nothing at all?
- 是啊，但是我想我可以叫个化验员过来 - 麻烦你把盐递给我 - I could get a lab man up here. - Hand me the salt, please.
好的，等一下，或许我们送他上医院 住上一两天可能会更好一些 Perhaps it would be better if we took him to the hospital.
上医院? The hospital?
否则的话没办法确诊他 - 话说回来，这鸡味道还真不赖 There's no other way to diagnose him. - This is not bad, actually.
咳，别跟我说我们得下车走到那屋子里 Don't tell me we're going to have to walk from the car to the house?
天哪，我来洛杉矶后 我的双脚还没挨过人行道呢 My feet haven't touched pavement since I reached Los Angeles.
那么，你和他见一面 如果你去见弗雷迪的话，那么我就去见你 I'll take a meeting with you if you'll take a meeting with Freddy.
我见过弗雷迪了 弗雷迪见过查理 I took a meeting with Freddy. Freddy took a meeting with Charlie.
- 你见见他吧 - 该见的面都要见 - You take a meeting with him. - All the good meetings are taken.
现在只是一种想法 Right now it's only a notion.
我想我可以弄到钱使它变成一种概念 然后再将它转变成一种思想 I think I can get money to make it into a concept, then turn it into an idea.
喜欢这房子吗，麦克斯? Like this house, Max?
我甚至带来张地图好领着我们去卫生间 Even wrote a road map to get us to the bathroom.
你应该告诉我 这是托尼·雷西的社交聚会 You should have told me it was Tony Lacey's party.
有什么不一样吗? What difference does that make?
我想他对安妮有点意思， I think he has a thing for Annie.
不，不，可惜的是，麦克斯 他和那边的那位姑娘在一起 - 哪一个? No. He goes with that girl over there. - Where?
- 那个有"见裤线"的 - "见裤线"? - The one with the VPL. - VPL?
看得见内裤线 麦克斯，她太漂亮了 Visible panty line. She's gorgeous.
是啊，她得十分，对你来说太重要了 因为你老是找只有两分的，不是吗? She's a ten. That's great for you, 'cause you're used to two's, aren't you?
没找过只有两分的，麦克斯 There are no two's.
你习惯于那种手里拎着购物袋 脸上戴着医生用的大口罩 You're used to the kind with shopping bags walking through Central Park...
嘴里嘟嘟囔囔地走过中央公园的姑娘 with the surgical masks on, muttering.
你认为这一对怎么样，麦克斯? 像是他们才从马思特斯和约翰逊(性医学家)那里回来 How do you like this couple? They look like they're from Masters and Johnson.
是啊，重症特护病房 噢，我的上帝！我想她正… Intensive care ward. My God!
- 我想她正朝我这边看 - 要是她过来的话，麦克斯，我的脑瓜子会变成鳄梨酱的 - I think she's giving me the eye. - If she comes over, my brain will mush.
我来应付，交给我来应付，嗨！
你是艾尔维·辛格吗? 我们是不是在"埃哈德研讨训练班"(心理治疗的cult组织)碰过面? You're Alvy Singer, right? Didn't we meet at EST?
"埃哈德研讨训练班"? 不，不，我从没参加过 No, I was never to EST.
那你怎么能瞎批评它呢? - 他没说什么 Then how can you criticize it? - He didn't say anything.
我没批评，我来这儿是为了做什么 电击疗法，可惜遇上了能源危机 I came to get some shock therapy, but there was an energy crisis.
他是我的食物品尝员，你们俩见过面吗? - 嗨，你好！ He's my food taster. Have you two met? - How do you do?
你是品尝食物看看是否下了毒? - 是啊，他疯了 Do you taste for poisoned food? - Yeah, he's great.
嗨，你们两个都穿白色服装 这一定是在明星的节目里 You guys are wearing white. It must be in the stars.
- 说不准尤里·盖勒(特异功能表演者)也在这屋子里的某个地方 - 我要和他一起表演 - Uri Geller must be on the premises. - We're going to operate together.
我们只要六个星期，大约六周后 我们就能灌完整张专辑 In about six weeks we could cut the whole album.
我不知道，这对我来说很新鲜 我不知道 I don't know. This is strange to me.
你可以来住在这儿 房子的整个这一侧你都可以用 You can stay here. Use the whole wing in this house.
- 噢，住在这儿?啊哈? - 真的，你为什么要笑? - Stay here? - Really. Why are you smiling?
我不知道，我不知道
他不仅是个伟大的经纪人 他还召集很好的会面 Not only is he a great agent, but he really gives good leading.
这是套很棒的房子，真的，应有尽有 桑拿、水流按摩浴缸、三个网球场 This is a great house: saunas, Jacuzzis, three tennis courts.
你们知道谁是最初的房主吗?先是尼尔森·埃迪(歌星影星)然后是雷格斯·戴蒙德乐队 You know who the original owners were? Nelson Eddy then Legs Diamond.
- 你们猜猜谁还在这儿住过? - 给点提示 - Then you know who lived here? - Trigger.
查理·卓别林，在他因"非美国化" 而被拒绝回国之前 Charlie Chaplin, right before his un-American thing.
你们两个仍然住在纽约 - 是啊，我喜欢那里 But you guys are still New Yorkers. - Yeah, I love it there.
我也在纽约住过，我在那儿住了几年 你知道，但是现在好像变得特别脏 I used to live there for years, but it's so dirty now.
我对垃圾很感兴趣，情有独衷 - 这间放映室真的很不错，很不错的房间 I'm into garbage. It's my thing. - This is a nice screening room.
关于纽约还有一点 There's another thing about New York.
你瞧，如果你想看电影 你不得不去排长队 If you want to see a movie, you have to stand on line.
天气可能冻得要死 或下着大雨，可这儿… It could be freezing or raining. And here-
我们昨晚在这里看的《大幻影》 We saw Grand lllusion here last night.
如果你吸点这个再看，更会觉得是部 伟大的电影，真的很有意思 That's a great film if you're high. It's really funny.
过来看看卧室 那里面也布置得很棒 Come and see our bedroom. We did a fantastic thing up there.
我还好，不用 I'm cool.
真太妙了 你知道他们整天边吃东西边看电影 It's wonderful. They eat and watch movies all day.
是啊，然后你就这样逐渐地老死 你知道有的时候努力一下也是很重要的 And gradually you get old and die. It's important to make an effort sometimes.
- 你认为他女朋友漂亮吗? - 是的，她很好看 - Do you think his girlfriend's pretty? - She's great looking.
有点中性化的风格，但是非常出众 A little on the androgynous side.
是的，我忘了做颂祷 I forgot my mantra.
玩得真愉快 That was fun.
我一点也不认为加利福尼亚有什么不好 I don't think California is bad at all.
回家反而让我感到乏味 It's a drag coming home.
那么多漂亮女人 和她们调调情也很有趣 A lot of beautiful women. It was fun to flirt.
我必须面对事实 I have to face facts.
我喜欢艾尔维，但是我们的关系 看起来走入了死路 I adore Alvy, but our relationship doesn't seem to work anymore.
我和安妮今晚在床上又要有 以往一样的麻烦了 I'll have the usual trouble with Annie in bed tonight.
为什么我还需要这个关系? Why do I need this?
但愿我有足够的勇气提出分手 但是那样真的会很伤害他 If only I had the nerve to break up, but it would really hurt him.
但愿我不会感到内疚 如果我让安妮搬出去的话 If only I didn't feel guilty asking Annie to move out.
那可能会令她伤心欲绝 但是我必须跟她坦白 It'd probably wreck her, but I should be honest.
艾尔维，让我们面对现实吧 Alvy, let's face it.
你知道，我不认为我们的关系会有出路 I don't think our relationship is working.
我知道，这种关系我认为就像一条鲨鱼 I know. A relationship is like a shark:
它必须不停地往前游 否则的话就会死掉 It has to constantly move forward or it dies.
我认为在我们手里的 是一条已经死掉了的鲨鱼 And I think what we've got on our hands is a dead shark.
这本《麦田里的守望者》是谁的? - 让我看一下，如果有我名字在上面 Whose Catcher in the Rye is this? - If it has my name on it...
那么我猜是我的 I guess it's mine.
当然有，你知道你在我所有的书上都写上 你的名字，因为你早料到这一天迟早会来 You wrote your name in all my books, 'cause you knew this day would come.
唉，艾尔维 你想分手的愿望和我的一样强烈吧 You wanted to break up just as much as I do.
我没问题，我认为我们这样做 是成熟的表现，毫无疑问 No question. I think we're doing the mature thing.
听着，所有有关死亡的书都是你的 Look. All the books on death and dying are yours.
所有有关诗歌的书都是我的 And all the poetry books are mine.
这本《拒绝死亡》，你还记得吗? 这是我给你买的第一本书 Denial of Death. This is the first book I got you.
噢，上帝，是的 - 还记得那天吗? Remember that day?
天哪，我感到我背后的负担减轻了好多 I feel like there's a great weight off my back.
多谢了，亲爱的 Thanks, honey.
噢，不，不，我的意思是，你知道，我是说发展新的关系等等的对我们两个都很重要 I mean, no. I think it's important for us to explore new relationships.
对此我没有异议，因为我们这样做绝对是打开天窗说亮话，你知道 There's no question about that, because we've given this a more than fair shot.
是啊，我的心理医生认为 这样做对我很关键 My analyst thinks this move is key for me.
是啊，你知道，我相信她 因为她是我的心理医生推荐的 And I trust her, because my analyst recommended her.
不管怎么说，为什么我要让你来忍受 我的不良情绪和焦虑不安呢? Why should I put you through all my moods and hang-ups anyway?
是的，你知道我们这样分手的好处吗? 我们还有机会破镜重圆的 You know what the beauty part is? We can always come back together again.
- 没问题的 - 正是，正是 - There's no problem. - Exactly.
要知道，我认为许多男女处理不好这个 你知道，他们分手后保持不了朋友关系 I don't think many couples could handle this, break up and remain friends.
咳，这个是我的，这颗徽章，还记得吗? This button is mine. Remember?
我想这些都是你的 "弹劾艾森豪威尔"、"弹劾尼克松" These are yours. "Impeach Eisenhower. " "Impeach Nixon. "
"弹劾林登·约翰逊" "弹劾罗纳德·里根" "Impeach Lyndon Johnson. " "Impeach Ronald Reagan. "
我想念安妮，我犯了一个可怕的错误 I miss Annie. I made a terrible mistake.
她现在住在洛杉矶 和托尼·雷西在一起 She's living in Los Angeles with Tony Lacey.
要是这样，那么就让她见鬼去吧！如果她喜欢那样的生活方式，那就让她呆在那里好了！ If she is, then the hell with her. If she likes that lifestyle, let her stay.
- 我要说的是，托尼是个混蛋 - 他从哈佛毕业的， - He's a jerk for one thing. - He graduated Harvard.
是的，他…听着，哈佛也会犯错 你知道，基辛格在那儿教过书 Harvard makes mistakes, too. Kissinger taught there.
别跟我说你这不是嫉妒? Don't tell me you're jealous?
是的，嫉妒，是有一点就像美狄亚 (希腊神话，因丈夫不忠而杀了他们的子女) Yeah. Jealous? A little bit. Like Medea.
让我给你看点东西，夫人 这个是我在她的房间里找到的 Can I show you something? I found this in the apartment.
黑肥皂，她以前用黑肥皂一天洗八百次脸 Black soap. She used to wash her face 800 times a day with black soap.
不要问我为什么 Don't ask me why.
你为什么不和其他女人约会呢? Why don't you go out with other women?
嗯，我试过 可是，你知道，结果总是很沮丧 I tried, but it's very depressing.
我老是对付不了这个 快点，去拿把扫帚来！ This always happens to me. Quick! Get a broom!
你为什么要弄得这样大惊小怪的? What are you making such a big deal about?
它们只是龙虾啊 They're only lobsters.
你是大人了，你知道该怎样抓龙虾 - 自从我戒烟以后，我就不太正常了 You're adult. You can pick up lobsters. - I'm not myself since I quit smoking.
- 噢，那你什么时候戒的烟? - 十六年前 - When did you quit? - Sixteen years ago.
- 你什么意思? - 意思? - What do you mean? - Mean?
你十六年前就停止吸烟了 你是这样说的吗? You stopped smoking 16 years ago. Is that what you said?
我不明白 I don't understand.
你是开玩笑还是什么? Are you joking or what?
中央公园开始变绿了 Central Park's turning green.
我又看见那个我们以前常见的 头顶风车帽 I saw that lunatic we used to see with the pinwheel hat...
脚蹬旱冰鞋的疯子了 and the roller-skates.
听着，我想你回到这儿来 Listen, I want you to come back here.
那好，那我就去你那里接你回来 Well, then I'm going to come out there and get you.
你什么意思，我在哪儿? 你以为我在哪儿? What do you mean, where am I? Where do you think I am?
我在洛山矶机场，我飞过来了 I'm at the Los Angeles airport. I flew in.
我飞过来见你 I flew in to see you.
听着，我们能不能不在电话上争吵 Can we not debate this on the telephone...
因为我感觉我的体温又升高了 because I've got a temperature...
还有我的慢性洛衫矶恶心症又犯了 我感觉不好 and I'm getting my chronic Los Angeles nausea again.
不管你想在哪儿见面，我不在乎 Wherever you want to meet. I don't care.
我会开车过去，我租了辆车 I'll drive in. I rented a car.
我会开车，你什么意思? I'm driving.
难道有什么大不了的吗? 我自己开车过去 What, is that such a miracle? I'm driving myself.
我要一份苜蓿苗 I'm going to have the alfalfa sprouts...
再来一盘酵母菌糊 and a plate of mashed yeast.
你看上去很漂亮 You look pretty.
噢，不，我只是减了点体重，仅此而已 No, I just lost a little weight, that's all.
那么，你看上去也不错 Well, you look nice.
我在考虑我们应该结婚了 I think we should get married.
噢，艾尔维，算了吧 Come on.
怎么?你想一直住在这儿? 就像住在矮人国里一样 Why, you want to live out here? It's like living in Munchkinland.
你什么意思? 这儿一切都很好 What do you mean? It's perfectly fine out here.
托尼人很好 Tony's very nice.
我结识朋友，参加聚会，还打网球 I meet people, go to parties and play tennis.
那是我迈出的很大的一步，你知道 That's a very big step for me.
我是说我能够和人们更好地相处了 I'm able to enjoy people more.
你什么…你不想回纽约吗? You're not going to come back to New York?
纽约究竟有什么好?那是座濒临死亡的城市，你读过《威尼斯之死》 What's so great about New York? It's a dying city. You read Death in Venice.
咳，要是我没给你买《威尼斯之死》 你也不会看 You didn't read Death in Venice until I bought it for you.
是的，是的 你只给我买标题带有"死亡"的书 That's right. You only gave me books with the word "death" in the title.
是的，因为这是个重要的问题 Because it's an important issue.
艾尔维，你无法享受生活，你知道吗? You're incapable of enjoying life. You know that?
我是说，你就像是纽约市 你是这样的人 You're like New York City. You're just this person.
你把自己封闭起来，像个小岛 You're like this island unto yourself.
我无法享受什么，除非人人都能那样 I can't enjoy anything unless everybody is.
你知道，要是哪里有人正在挨饿 那么我晚上就会睡不好觉 If one guy is starving someplace, it puts a crimp in my evening.
那么你到底想不想结婚嘛? Do you want to get married?
不，我们只是朋友 No. We're friends.
我想保持朋友关系 I want to remain friends.
好吧，请拿帐单来，能把… Check please.
你很生气，是吗? You're mad, aren't you?
是的，我当然很生气 因为你爱我，我知道的 Yes, of course I'm mad, because you love me. I know that.
艾尔维，就我现阶段的生活而言 我不认为那是事实 I can't say that that's true at this point in my life.
我真的不认为那是事实 I really can't say that's true.
我想说你知道你自己有多出色 You know how wonderful you are.
是你鼓励我走出我的房间 给我勇气去唱歌 You're the reason I got out of my room, that I was able to sing...
让我了解了自己的感情 诸如此类的等等… and get more in touch with my feelings and all that crap.
听着，听着，嗯… Listen, listen.
那么你又在忙什么呢? So what are you up to?
还是和往常一样，试着写点东西 我正在写一个舞台剧 The usual. I'm trying to write. I'm working on a play.
那么你是说你不愿意跟我回纽约? Are you saying you're not coming back to New York with me?
不！你看，我得走了 No. Look. I gotta go.
- 你什么意思嘛?我飞了三千英里来看你 - 我要迟到了 What do you mean? I flew 3,000 miles to see you.
是航空英里，你知道 在飞机上我的胃有多难受吗? Air miles. Do you know what that does to my stomach?
你应该知道托尼正忙得要死 If you must know, it's a hectic time for Tony.
今晚就是格莱美奖 - 是什么? The Grammys are tonight. - The what?
格莱美颁奖 他出的好多张唱片有望获奖 The Grammys. He's got a lot of records up for awards.
哦，是吗?他们给那样的音乐还颁奖? 我恨不得把耳朵塞住 They give awards for that music? I thought just ear plugs.
我们还是忘了吧，艾尔维，行吗? 让我们忘了刚才的谈话吧 Just forget it. Let's just forget the conversation.
颁奖！他们不干别的，只会颁奖！ 我简直不敢相信！ They do nothing but give out awards. I can't believe it.
最佳法西斯独裁奖：阿道夫·希特勒！ Greatest Fascist Dictator: Adolph Hitler.
我知道你会说什么 我的车开得不太好 I know what you're going to say. I'm not a great driver.
你知道，我有点麻烦… - 请出示你的驾照！ I have some problems with- - May I see your license, please?
只是别生气 Just don't get angry.
我的驾照在这儿 这辆车是租来的 I have my license here. It's a rented car.
别跟我絮叨你这一辈子的故…事 Don't give me your life's story.
把驾照捡起来 Just pick up the license.
噢，"把驾照捡起来"，你应该好好地说 You have to ask nicely,
因为我今天过得太糟糕了，我女朋友… because I've had a rough day. My girlfriend-
能不能请你就把驾照交给我呢? Just give me the license, please.
既然你这样说 那我就很难拒绝了 Since you put it that way, it's hard for me to refuse.
我和长官一向不怎么对劲，你知道 I have a terrific problem with authority.
这不是你的原因 我不是针对你个人的 It's not your fault. Don't take it personal.
再见，伙计们，保持联系 So long, fellows. Keep in touch.
可以想象我接到你的电话有多吃惊吗，麦克斯? Imagine my surprise when I got your call.
是啊，我感觉到了我打得不是时候 Yeah. I had the feeling I got you at a bad moment.
因为我在电话里听到了尖叫声 I heard high-pitched squealing.
一对孪生姐妹，麦克斯 Twins, Max.
才十六岁 Sixteen-year-olds.
你能想象数学上出现这种事的几率吗? Can you imagine the mathematical possibilities of that?
你是个演员，麦克斯 你应该在中央公园里表演莎士比亚 You're an actor. You should be doing Shakespeare in the park.
噢，我在中央公园里演过莎士比亚 麦克斯，可是我被抢了 I did Shakespeare in the park. I got mugged.
我在演《理查二世》，有两个穿 皮夹克的家伙，偷走了我的紧身连衣戏裤 I was playing Richard ll. Two guys with leather jackets stole my leotard.
麦克斯，我们这是要驾车 穿越钚元素放射区吗? Are we driving through plutonium?
防止阿尔法射线的，麦克斯 那样你就不会变老了 Keeps out the alpha rays. You don't get old.
你应该是一个会思考的人， 你怎么能选择这样的生活方式? You're a thinking person. How can you choose this lifestyle?
纽约到底有什么特别了不起的地方? What is so great about New York?
那是座濒临死亡的城市 你读过《威尼斯之死》 It's a dying city. You read Death in Venice.
是我给你《威尼斯之死》之后 你才读的 You didn't read Death in Venice until I gave it to you.
你只给我看标题带有"死亡"的书 You only give me books with the word "death" in the title.
- 这是个重要的问题 - 你完全无法享受生活 - It's an important issue. - You're incapable of enjoying life.
你就像是纽约，你是座孤岛 You're like New York. You're an island.
那好吧，如果我们所经历的一切 对你而言仅此而已 Okay. If that's all that we've been through together means to you...
那我想我们最好还是就此别过 永不再见 it's better if we just said good-bye, once and for all.
你不觉得这有点可笑吗? It's funny.
经历了那么多认真的讨论和 激情的时刻之后 After all the serious talks and passionate moments...
一切都在这里结束了 在日落大道上的一家健康食品餐馆里 that it ends here, in a health food restaurant on Sunset Boulevard.
再见，萨莉 Good-bye, Sally.
等等！我想跟你一起走 Wait. I'm going to go with you.
我爱你 I love you.
你想怎么样?这是我的第一部戏 What do you want? It was my first play.
你知道人们总是试图 通过艺术来表达完美 You know how you're always trying to get things to come out perfect in art
因为真实的生活比较难缠 because it's real difficult in life.
有趣的是，我的确又遇见过安妮 Interestingly, however, I did run into Annie again.
那是在曼哈顿的西北区 It was on the Upper West Side of Manhattan.
她搬回纽约来了 和某个人一起住在搜活区 She had moved back to New York. She was living in Soho with some guy.
我碰见她时 她正拽着他去看《悲伤和怜悯》呢 When I met her, she was dragging him in to see The Sorrow and the Pity
这个我可以算成是我个人的胜迹 which I counted as a personal triumph.
那以后的某一天 安妮和我一起吃了中餐 Annie and I had lunch sometime after that...
回忆着我们往昔的时光 and just kicked around old times.
将我的双臂 Just to have my arms
与你相拥 Around you
依然令我心动 Still the thrill
在那一天 That it was the day
我发现你 I found you
仿佛 Seems like
旧时 Old times
相约晚餐鲜花束束 Dinner dates and flowers
旧时 Old times
之后，天有点晚了，我们都得回去了 After that, it got late and we both had to go.
再一次见到安妮，我真的很高兴 But it was great seeing Annie again.
我意识到她是一个多么好的人 I realize what a terrific person she was...
能认识她就是一件多么有趣的事情 and how much fun it was just knowing her.
我想起了那个老的笑话，你知道 And I thought of that old joke.
有个家伙去看精神病医生 他说："大夫，我兄弟疯了" This guy goes to a psychiatrist and says, "Doc, my brother's crazy.
他以为他自己是一只鸡 He thinks he's a chicken. "
医生说："那你怎么不把他带来?" The doctor says, "Why don't you turn him in?"
那家伙说："我是想带他来着 可是我需要鸡蛋啊" The guy says, "I would, but I need the eggs. "
你看，我想这就是现在 我对男女之间关系的感觉 Well, I guess that's, now, how I feel about relationships.
你知道，它是完全非理性的 疯狂的、甚至荒谬的 They're totally irrational, crazy and absurd.
但是我想我们还一直要经历这一切 But I guess we keep going through it...
因为我们大多数人都需要鸡蛋 because most of us need the eggs.
伍迪·艾伦——艾尔维·辛格(麦克斯) 黛安·基顿——安妮·霍尔
托尼·罗伯茨——罗伯(麦克斯)
卡萝尔·凯恩——爱丽森·普曲尼克(第一任妻子) 保罗·西蒙——托尼·雷西(唱片制片人)
雪莉·杜法尔——帕梅(《滚石》记者) 珍妮特·马高林——罗宾(第二任妻子)
克里斯多佛·沃尔肯——杜温·霍尔(弟弟) 科琳·丢赫斯特——霍尔太太(母亲)