Sincro: wyxchari
You feeling better now, dear.
Erm. Yes, thank you. There's nothing like tea and crumpets is there? I feel so much more relaxed.
Oh that's good to hear, isn't it Tilda.
Yes, very good.
All the same, I really must be going now.
Oh, we couldn't possibly let you do that.
Oh no, not this time.
We can't possibly miss this opportunity, can we Tabby?
No we can't Tabby, not since those horrid little Kangs got suspicious of our little ways.
I am sorry, dear.
What d'you mean?
Well you see, we would like you to stay for a very long time.
In fact we don't imagine you ever leaving at all.
You are joking aren't you? Tilda? TABBY?
We don't see this as a matter for humour, Mel dear. We mean every word.
In our experience, Mel dear, it is much better not to struggle too much.
You must have a secret escape route.
I mean it's not like Kangs to allow themselves to be caught like rats in a trap.
Red Kangs have an unseen outway but
But what?
The Caretakers will be in our Brainquarters too soon for the Kangs to use it.
I see. You need time. Well, I will buy you that time. I'm the reason why the Caretakers are here.
Now go on, make your escape. Go on. Shoo! Build high for happiness.
Look, a joke's a joke but this gone on long enough.
Mel dear, I do think by now you should be appreciating that though Tabby
and myself are not averse to a humorous remark now and then, no joke was intended.
See if you can spot the basil.
Oh it's here somewhere. Uh, here we are.
Oh what is it, dear?
There's something wrong with the waste disposal unit.
No, don't talk nonsense, dear. It always makes that funny noise.
I think something's coming up in it.
Don't be silly, dear.
Oh we better make sure, Tabby.
Oh very well dear.
No, I can't see anything.
Tabby! Tabby!
Oh, what a naughty little girl we are.
Looks as though butter wouldn't melt in her mouth and now she's killed poor dear, Tabby.
It wasn't me, Tilda. It was the thing in the waste disposal.
Fibbing now is it? I hate little fibbers.
My name is PexÂ…
Help, Pex, help!
No! Now look.
Don't just stand there help me! Help!
You arrived just in time.
Mel.
Yeah.
Mel? Does mean that I've really helped save someone from something for the first time?
I think it might.
I think you'll find that the rulebook states that I remove the last section of the door.
Greetings, Deputy Chief Caretaker. You look surprised to see me.
I can't imagine why after all it was me you came for.
Seize him.
You're not alone down there, are you?
As a matter of fact I am.
You don't fool me, Great Architect. There are Kangs down there.
Take a look for yourself if you don't believe me.
Well?
I don't know what you're so pleased about.
There's a 327 appendix 3 Subsection 9 Death waiting for you.
What is it?
It's a map of the Paradise Towers. It occurred to me that when everyone was brought here,
they'd have been given a map to help them get around.
Well, I wasn't. But then nobody knew that I was in the ship, did they.
This building is huge, isn't it. 304 floors!
And we must be on floor 109.
Mel?
Yeah?
Are you want to get to the Pool in the Sky?
Of course, that's where I'm meeting the Doctor.
You mustn't go.
That's silly and anyway here is it. Floor 304.
But Mel!
What now?
Only the unalive go there.
Who says so?
Everybody, Bin Liner and Fire Escape.
Now that's odd.
What?
Look down here where it says, "Basement", and underneath, "No plan available.
Entry forbidden to all residents of Paradise Towers on pain of death".
You don't have to come.
But I do. It's my job to protect you.
So you're coming with me, come what may?
Welcome back, Great Architect.
I'm relieved that it's you and not my Deputy who will be enjoying
a 327 Appendix 3 Subsection 9 Death.
For a start his demise would have involved an enormous amount of extra paper work.
Chief?
Yes.
Chief, as I was coming in I heard reports that Caretaker Number 97 Stroke 2
Subsection 9 had disappeared without any known explanation. And that Caretaker 348
I'm well aware of that.
But Chief if this goes on and the Cleaners are out of control; how many of us are going to be left?
Deputy Chief Caretaker, by talking out of turn in such a way,
you have broken so many rules and regulations
that it would take me several hours just to innumerate them. Wait outside would you.
Yes, Chief.
I think it would be a very good idea if, before your death,
you and I had a nice little Regulation 13 Appendix 2 final conversation.
Kang wallscrawl.
I know.
Quiet!
What is it now?
I thought I saw a Blue Kang.
Relax! Come on.
Are you the Great Architect?
You mean you're not certain anymore?
Oh I shall have you killed anyway but it would be interesting to know.
What makes you think I'm the Great Architect? Haven't you ever met him?
Just when Paradise Towers was being completed, before any of us got here,
he disappeared under mysterious circumstances. Never been seen since anywhere.
How odd.
Odd indeed for a being who head was apparently full of extravagant future plans.
But I always knew in my bones he'd turn up again one day.
Start altering things just when I'd got them the way I wanted.
And that would justify killing me, I mean him.
Oh yeah.
Like everyone else you seem terrified to face up to the reality
of what's happening in Paradise Towers.
I mean killing me won't help you find out who's sending out those robotic Cleaners to kill people.
And that's a problem that isn't going to go away.
Unless, of course, you're giving the orders yourself.
What a ridiculous idea!
Perhaps but I do have a better one.
And what is that?
No doubt you've been allowing the Cleaners to kill off some of your people as well as the Kangs,
for reasons which are at the moment beyond me but then I'm not a power crazed psychopath.
What did you say?
Listen you're going to kill me anyway so you may as well make use of my brain.
What I also think is happening is that, besides your activities, is that the Caretakers, the Kangs,
Red, Yellow, Blue and everyone else are being killed off without instructions from you.
And that's why you're worried. You don't know how doing it.
Oh don't I!
Report from floor 109Chief! Two of the oldsters have apparently disappeared
and it's believed they've gone down the XY3 standard issue waste disposal unit.
What!?!
It's unheard of Chief!
I should remind you that under emergency regulation number 348 stroke 5 Subsection 6.
Alright, alright, alright! I better go and investigate this myself. Deputy, I leave you in charge.
I don't need to remind you of the consequences of second mistake.
No Chief.
No Perhaps we should allow the Great Architect to see
a copy of the Illustrated Prospectus of Paradise Towers.
Might bring back happy memories for him. Not that I shall be away long.
It's against my principles to keep anyone waiting.
And no funny business with the rulebook this time, alright?
I'm afraid I've got far too much to worry about, Deputy Chief Caretaker.
It's all safe. Quick!
Now all I have to do is press the button the 304th floor and
Um, Mel?
Yes? What is it?
Look!
What is it?
I'll explain later. Could you just press the button?
Of course. Come on!
We call those the Cleaners and sometimes they
Pex?
What?
Am I imagining things?
Why?
Are we going up or are we going down?
We're going down.
But I pressed the button
The Kangs play a game you see. They get into the lift
and press the buttons for all kinds of floors up and down the building.
So we could be stuck in here going up and down for hours.
Yes.
"Welcome one and all to Paradise Towers, which will be your new home for a good few years to come.
Some of you will understandably feel nervous at leaving everything you know
for a strange new environment.
But we believe once you've tasted the Paradise Towers experience you won't want to
change it for any other.
Our motto is "Build High for Happiness".
The facilities of this mighty structure are unrivalled as you can see from these pictures."
How you do, Doctor.
How you do. Bin Liner, Fire Escape, how did you get here?
We track you down the Carrydoors,
creep in when the Chief Caretaker left and bundle up these others.
Sorry to disturb you.
Not at all, I'm delighted to see you. Ah, whoops.
I'm sure there are some rules to govern this, Deputy Chief.
That's the most intelligent thing he's said so far.
Well, I can't think of any other explanation can you?
Since you ask, thousands.
Well, it's never happened before. We Rezzies are all very frightened.
Well you have my assurance; there is no cause for panic.
No cause for panic?
No.
No cause for panic?
No.
Two of my next door neighbours have just disappeared down the waste disposal chute.
I wouldn't wish that on anybody.
I will conduct a full investigation on the matter.
In due course a report will be issued to all residents.
And you may rest assured there'll be no cover up. No cover up whatsoever.
On the other hand I would urge you for the moment to keep the matter quiet.
We don't want to alarm people unduly, do we?
We'll I'm not really sure I ought to.
Not that I would wish to bribe you to hold your tongue in anyway but rules can be made flexible.
And it could be arranged for you to move into this flat instead of your own.
It is substantially larger.
And after all what's the good of panicking people when I repeat everything is under control.
Well I'd hate to upset anybody.
Exactly. And now if you'll excuse me I think I will depart
and begin my investigation. In the basement, perhaps.
Well is suppose it is one way of seeing the Paradise Towers,
just so long as nothing goes wrong with the lift.
What did you?
Oh I doesn't matter really. It's just if the lift gets completely stuck between floors...
And the lights go out.
Oh, I hate the dark.
Well Kangs, I must say there's no place like home. And this is no place like home.
Be seated, Doctor.
And drink.
Thank you, Fire Escape. But before we do anything else, we must view the Illustrated Prospectus.
Now which pocket did I put it in?
Hand on, I think I've found something. The controls are really stiff though.
Here, let me.
Well done, Pex! Except we seem to be going down. Very fast!
All shape ship and ready, Doctor.
Ah, the beginning's not important, Bin Liner. Wind it on.
"Paradise Towers has been specially designed for you by Kroagnon,
universally known as the Great Architect.
The genius responsible for Golden Dream Park, The Bridge of Perpetual Motion, Miracle City "
Miracle City!
Where are we now?
Oh no.
What is it?
I think we're in the basement.
As in, "Forbidden to all residents of Paradise Towers on pain of death".
You hear that! We have to get out of here.
Kroagnon was a brilliant architect. And Miracle City. His masterpiece. Only
Only?
Only he refused to move out and let anybody move in.
He thought that people would destroy the beauty of his work.
But they got him. Only those who moved in lived to regret it.
He made them unalive.
Nothing could be proven so he got away with it. And as I said he was a brilliant architect.
And space is a big place so he got other work. Of course, including Paradise Towers.
Blank walls and cleaners.
Quite. And then he disappeared. Mayhaps, my dear Red Kangs,
mayhaps your parents thought they were being very clever
by trapping him in his own building so that he wouldn't finish it.
But if they did such a thing it was very foolish.
Because no matter how deep they buried him in Paradise Towers, he's bound to get out in the end.
Oi! What are you doing there Robotic Cleaner 479?
I didn't order you to stand there. Get back to the 67Y Ghetto at once.
Do you hear my orders? What do you think you're doing Robotic Cleaner 479?
Look there's no need for this. Really there isn't.
No need at all. I was on my way to the basement anyway.
Oh we've got to get out of here. This is really jammed this time.
Shall I hit it?
Alright give it a try. What have we got to lose? Come on, Pex.
Well done, Pex. Going up.
So what must Red Kangs do, Doctor?
We'll fight for you!
Yes!!!!
More than that. You must tell me all you know.
I mean that door with smoke coming out of it. Where is it?
Please, it's important.
In the basement. The Cleaners have a secret alleviator. Red Kangs have used it and seen
And seen what?
Things they couldn't speak of.
I'm going down to the basement to find out what's going on.
I'll go and look with you, Doctor.
And me!
And me! And me! And me!
Fire Escape, Bin Liner and Air Duct you come with me. The rest stay here.
No. Red Kangs leave no outlooks.
Blue Kangs have got into their Brain Quarters and won the game. Blue Kangs are best!
Please! Please! Please! This is no time for games. The future of Paradise Towers is at stake.
We must all work together. You have got to help us. D'you understand?
But Blue Kangs have won!
Chief! Chief? Chief. It's no good. I can't trace him anywhere.
Look, you've got to believe me.
I'm sure the Red Kangs will agree that you've won this round of the game.
And there won't be many rounds worth playing if we don't discover who's ordering the killing.
Will you let us go to the basement?
More. I will come with you.
Good. Then you'll see with your own eyes what's going on.
Blue Kang eyespy saw Chief Caretaker footing it there too.
We must hurry. What's the quickest way to get there?
We must use the Cleaner's secret alleviator.
Ah right. To the basement! Build high for happiness.
300. 301. 302. 303. 30 We made it!
I just don' believe it. I really don't.
And look here it is. Oh, it's just how I imagined it.
Why don't the residents of the Towers ever use it, Pex?
It's the home of the unalive. We shouldn't be here.
I think that's all nonsense.
Don't you think it's wonderful to be somewhere calm and clean and relaxing?
It makes me nervous.
Oh everything makes you nervous.
I'm glad this is where I agreed to meet the Doctor.
Aren't you going to have a swim, Pex? I just don't understand you.
I think all that talk of it being dangerous is just a trick
by the Caretakers so they don't have to come
and clean up the pool all the time.
Well come on, lets investigate. Just a few minutes to take the weight off my feet
and then it's straight in to that lovely cool water.
Look, I don't understand what the matter is, my beauty.
I've always made sure you had lot of tender little morsels to keep you big and strong.
So why are giving the cleaners orders that aren't my orders
and cleaning people I didn't tell you to kill.
Because the bodies the Cleaners brought were not right.
Not right? What for?
For me to live in.
To live in? I don't understand my pet.
Neither could they. That was the problem.
You see all these bodies disappearing. People are starting to notice you know.
No matter.
What did you say?
I am ready now. I have my plan.
Look it's nice to have you chattier than usual, my pet.
But I do think you might be a bit more grateful for all I've done for you.
You have done all I need you to do. I need only one more thing from you.
Oh do you? And suppose I won't give it to you?
You have no choice. I am Kroagnon, the Great Architect
and I will put an end to you and everyone in Paradise Towers.
Ware Cleaners!
Back to the lift.
Wait, Doctor.
Back!
Doctor!!!