Okay so there's this 7, 38, 55 rule - which says that 7 percent of all communication
is words, 38 percent is your tone of voice, and a whopping 55 percent of all communication
is through your body language - and if you add it up, it turns out that more than 90%
of all communication is non-verbal.
So, if you want to present yourself as a confident person, the best way to achieve that is through
your tonality and body language - and by the end of the video you will learn exactly how
to do that.
This video will be divided into 2 parts.
First, we will discuss body language tips and habits of extremely confident individuals
and in the second part we will go from head to toes, covering your feet, legs, torso,
arms and head.
Now, here are the 4 tips that you can literally start using today to improve your body language
and exude a powerful, calm yet confident vibe in all of conversations and social interactions.
First: Look your best.
This is how our society works right now.
Whether you like it or now you will be judged by your appearance.
I know this is not strictly a body language tip, but it's important! because depending
if you look your best or if you don't care about your appearance at all it can either
increase or decrease the effectiveness of the tips that follow.
Plus, you will automatically feel more confident when you look your best, I'm sure you've experienced
this already.
And by looking your best I don't mean expensive brands and golden watches, what I mean is
that you're clean, smell nice and your clothes are appropriate and fit nicely.
Second: Use power poses.
Whenever you are feeling powerful you tend to subconsciously use a power pose.
But what Social psychologist Amy Cuddy revealed in her TED talk is that standing or sitting
with certain poses for as little two minutes raises testosterone levels and lowers cortisol
(also known as the stress hormone).
Those hormone levels are associated with power and dominance.
In other words, if you use power poses even if you are not feeling confident, you Will
begin to feel powerful, dominant, optimistic – traits that belong to the confident alpha.
I will link the TED talk in the description so you can learn more about the poses and
I highly recommend that you go ahead and watch the whole thing.
Third: Slow yourself down.
This was absolutely the tip that made the biggest difference in my case.
And by slowing down I mean slow your movement, your speech, slow down your arms, if someone
calls you slow down as you're turning your head, simply imagine that you are in a pool
of water and act with that speed.
The reason why slowing down works is because it shows people that you got everything under
control even if you don't.
And it shows that you are not afraid, you're confident and calm, even if something bad
happens you will find a way to fix it.
The opposite of being slow is being impulsive, nervous and fidgeting.
So, try to lower those things as much as possible, and simply remember to slow yourself down.
Fourth: Practice smiling and holding eye contact correctly.
Looking down when walking or talking is the fastest way to show someone that you are uncomfortable
and not confident.
What you should do instead is to hold firm eye contact about 80% of the conversation.
If you are not comfortable holding eye contact, you can try looking your partner in the eyebrows
at first, it will be much easier and they won't notice the difference - after that gradually
work your way up into full eye contact.
Also wear a smirk, a light smile on your face throughout the day, so you come across as
approachable, fun and confident person.
After the video go ahead and look yourself in the mirror, compare having a dead serious
face with a light playful confident smile, you'll notice the difference immediately.
Now let's go over your stance and posture.
Start with your feet shoulder width apart, and your toes pointing outwards.
This is considered open body language.
If your legs are crossed or you have one leg behind the other – this type of body language
is called closed body language and its associated with fear, anxiety, defense and lack of confidence
traits that are not so attractive.
On the other hand, open body language is associated with confidence and power, so feet shoulder
width apart and toes pointed outwards.
Bonus tip for your feet and legs is to take big steps.
Or at least, don't take small steps.
Shuffling or creeping makes you look nervous.
So, take firm strides.
Arms:
Don't cross them!
When we're nervous, we tend to put our hands in our pockets, behind our backs or cross
them to cover our chest, and that can be seen as shy, introverted and passive.
So, don't cross them, don't hide them, keep them relaxed by your side, on your waist or
use them to emphasize certain points in your conversation.
Now I want you to pay close attention to the next 2 groups because they will literally
change how people see you.
It's your shoulders and chest.
I want you to notice your posture right now, most of you watching this video will have
your shoulders slouched forward and your chest inwards – and, because we spend a lot of
time in this position because of computers and phones, without thinking we carry it throughout
the day.
What you should do is, first bring your shoulders back and then down.
This will fix your posture, open up your chest and straighten your neck.
Speaking about the neck, it should be in line with your body, and your head should be facing
forward.
You should bring your chin just a little bit upwards, but don't overdo it as you may come
across as arrogant.
Also avoid tilting your head down as it signals uncertainty and lack of confidence.
There is a lot of information in this video and it might be hard to think about all of
those things during the day, so I want you to kinda learn all of this stuff, get a feel
for it instead of memorizing it.
Confident body language is all about opening yourself up, doing slow and controlled motions,
speaking with calm and confident voice, having a straight posture with your shoulders back
and your chest up, not being afraid to take up space and looking and feeling comfortable,
a rule of thumb is if you feel comfortable you look comfortable.
Give yourself 10-15 minutes in front of the mirror after this video, correct some of the
things you think need to fixed with your posture, walking or talking.
Practice some of the power poses, because those 15 minutes may change how people perceive you.
You can literally become more confident, attractive and successful in your social life and in
your life in general if you apply these concepts.
If you look and feel confident long enough on the outside, I guarantee - you will also
start to feel it on the inside.
Anyway, thanks for watching, and I'll see you next time.