1 00:00:02,336 --> 00:00:04,547 - No, Mitch! God! Mitch! - Mitch! 2 00:00:04,631 --> 00:00:06,216 Save the camp... 3 00:00:06,299 --> 00:00:07,383 Save the camp? How? 4 00:00:07,466 --> 00:00:10,261 - Mitch! - Mitch! 5 00:00:10,344 --> 00:00:12,013 Follow the money. 6 00:00:12,096 --> 00:00:13,682 But how do we follow the money? 7 00:00:16,851 --> 00:00:17,936 Get the code. 8 00:00:18,019 --> 00:00:20,647 Code? What code? What code? 9 00:00:20,730 --> 00:00:22,441 No! No, no, no! 10 00:00:22,524 --> 00:00:24,401 - Mitch! - Mitchell! Oh, God. 11 00:00:24,483 --> 00:00:25,818 Mitch! 12 00:00:27,406 --> 00:00:29,406 Sync and corrections by btsix www.addic7ed.com 13 00:00:31,575 --> 00:00:34,619 {an8}Cruisin' time comin' 'round one to the one-five. 14 00:00:34,703 --> 00:00:37,622 {an8}That's 1:15 as the crow flies, 15 00:00:37,706 --> 00:00:41,000 {an8}or in the case of yours truly, as the Beekeeper buzzes. 16 00:00:41,084 --> 00:00:42,085 {an8}Ahh! 17 00:00:42,168 --> 00:00:44,545 {an8}I've only been at Camp Firewood for a few hours, 18 00:00:44,629 --> 00:00:46,923 {an8}but it already feels like an old pair of sneakers. 19 00:00:47,006 --> 00:00:49,843 {an8}Speakin' of which, Lyme disease is here 20 00:00:49,926 --> 00:00:51,970 {an8}-and those ticks don't play favorites. 21 00:00:52,053 --> 00:00:55,890 {an8}So make sure you keep your jeans long and your laces tied if you're woods-bound. 22 00:00:55,974 --> 00:00:57,141 {an8}Ew! 23 00:00:57,225 --> 00:00:59,853 {an8}And congrats, congrats to Jonas and Gail, 24 00:00:59,936 --> 00:01:02,897 {an8}tying the knot later today at the upper field. 25 00:01:02,981 --> 00:01:06,610 It's early afternoon, sort of the lower midriff of the day, if you will. 26 00:01:06,693 --> 00:01:09,278 And if you won't, then that's okay. 27 00:01:11,364 --> 00:01:12,782 We have to stay calm, okay? 28 00:01:12,866 --> 00:01:14,826 Just need to keep it together. We'll fix this. 29 00:01:14,909 --> 00:01:16,244 Fix it? How can we fix it? 30 00:01:16,327 --> 00:01:18,454 My lover's just drowned in a pool of green sludge. 31 00:01:18,537 --> 00:01:20,331 - We can't fix it. - He's gone now. 32 00:01:20,414 --> 00:01:21,625 We can't change that. 33 00:01:21,708 --> 00:01:24,418 But now the camp needs us, okay? 34 00:01:24,502 --> 00:01:26,254 And the parents are gonna be asking a lot of questions. 35 00:01:26,337 --> 00:01:27,338 And we have to tell them the truth. 36 00:01:27,421 --> 00:01:30,174 Absolutely not! The truth is the last thing we need to tell them. 37 00:01:30,258 --> 00:01:32,844 When they ask us where Mitch is, what are we gonna say? 38 00:01:32,927 --> 00:01:34,596 - He's dead. - No. 39 00:01:34,679 --> 00:01:36,055 Beth, look at me. Focus! 40 00:01:36,139 --> 00:01:38,182 - I'm trying. - Try harder. 41 00:01:38,266 --> 00:01:39,643 Try harder? What is this? 42 00:01:39,726 --> 00:01:41,811 The latest ad campaign for Avis Rent A Car? 43 00:01:41,895 --> 00:01:43,897 'Cause that's their ad campaign. 44 00:01:46,190 --> 00:01:47,901 Let's go save Camp Firewood. 45 00:01:53,948 --> 00:01:55,700 Hey, you. 46 00:01:55,784 --> 00:01:57,410 Can I come in? 47 00:01:58,036 --> 00:01:59,453 I guess so. 48 00:02:06,460 --> 00:02:07,503 So... 49 00:02:07,586 --> 00:02:09,839 I'm really sorry that I lied about unpacking my bags. 50 00:02:09,923 --> 00:02:11,966 But the reason that I lied 51 00:02:12,050 --> 00:02:15,679 is because what I really was doing was wrapping a gift for you. 52 00:02:15,762 --> 00:02:17,180 Really? 53 00:02:19,348 --> 00:02:20,892 Oh, my God. 54 00:02:23,645 --> 00:02:26,439 Wow, that's such an odd way to wrap a present. 55 00:02:26,522 --> 00:02:28,482 Yeah, it's just... It's easier for multiple takes. 56 00:02:28,566 --> 00:02:32,611 It's a shofar. I bought it for you in Yerushalayim. 57 00:02:32,696 --> 00:02:35,824 Oh, awesome! Like in temple on Rosh Hashanah! 58 00:02:38,451 --> 00:02:40,036 Oh! 59 00:02:40,912 --> 00:02:42,205 Gonna have to work on that. 60 00:02:42,288 --> 00:02:44,498 Well, you have a few more months till Rosh. 61 00:02:44,582 --> 00:02:49,045 The shofar symbolizes many different things. 62 00:02:49,128 --> 00:02:54,133 Like strength and joy. 63 00:02:54,217 --> 00:02:55,885 Love. 64 00:02:55,969 --> 00:02:58,805 Coop, it feels really good to speak my truth with you. 65 00:02:59,806 --> 00:03:00,807 Yeah. 66 00:03:03,893 --> 00:03:06,020 You have really great arms. 67 00:03:06,104 --> 00:03:07,563 - I do? - Yeah. 68 00:03:07,646 --> 00:03:09,232 You should show them off. 69 00:03:09,315 --> 00:03:11,359 - All right. - Yeah. 70 00:03:11,442 --> 00:03:15,071 You just push this up like that. Perfect. 71 00:03:17,907 --> 00:03:19,951 Can I kiss you, Donna? 72 00:03:20,034 --> 00:03:22,245 Okay. 73 00:03:25,581 --> 00:03:27,375 Ooh! 74 00:03:28,918 --> 00:03:32,088 - Save the camp. Gotta save the camp. - Save the camp. A volleyball... 75 00:03:32,171 --> 00:03:33,381 - Whoa, whoa, whoa! - Hey! 76 00:03:33,464 --> 00:03:35,549 Where is Mitch? We have been looking for him all morning. 77 00:03:35,633 --> 00:03:37,051 Where is he? 78 00:03:37,135 --> 00:03:39,178 - Mitch is very close by right now. - Okay. 79 00:03:39,262 --> 00:03:42,515 And he's very excited to say hello to all of you. 80 00:03:42,598 --> 00:03:45,059 He promised my daughter she could be in the same bunk with her friends, 81 00:03:45,143 --> 00:03:47,228 and instead she's with Justine and Pam! 82 00:03:47,311 --> 00:03:49,397 I'll get ahold of him. 83 00:03:49,480 --> 00:03:50,982 Hello, Mitch? 84 00:03:51,065 --> 00:03:53,526 This is Mitch. I'm somewhere else right now. 85 00:03:53,609 --> 00:03:55,111 See that? He's somewhere else right now. 86 00:03:55,194 --> 00:03:57,238 That walkie-talkie probably has a tape recorder in it, 87 00:03:57,321 --> 00:04:00,116 and you tape-recorded Mitch's voice earlier and now you're just playing it. 88 00:04:00,199 --> 00:04:03,369 - Where's Mitch? - Mitch. Mitch? Um... 89 00:04:03,452 --> 00:04:05,789 He's right over there in the soccer field, see? 90 00:04:05,872 --> 00:04:07,165 - Is that Mitch? - Oh! 91 00:04:07,248 --> 00:04:09,167 I recognize his hat. That is Mitch. 92 00:04:09,250 --> 00:04:10,919 - Hey! Hey, Mitch! - There he is. 93 00:04:11,002 --> 00:04:12,754 I gotta hand it to you, you just saved our bacon. 94 00:04:12,837 --> 00:04:14,630 But we only have an hour, maybe two, 95 00:04:14,713 --> 00:04:16,715 before those parents realize that's not Mitch. 96 00:04:16,800 --> 00:04:17,801 Come on. 97 00:04:17,884 --> 00:04:19,635 Mitch, our daughter is allergic to bees. 98 00:04:21,304 --> 00:04:24,348 Who are you making your friendship bracelet for, Katie? 99 00:04:24,432 --> 00:04:26,517 Oh, I'm making a boyfriendship bracelet 100 00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:29,353 for my boyfriend, Blake, from Camp Tigerclaw. 101 00:04:29,437 --> 00:04:32,273 We've been to second base twice. So that adds up to fourth. 102 00:04:32,356 --> 00:04:34,692 And he is so good at lacrosse. 103 00:04:34,776 --> 00:04:35,819 I thought I heard my name. 104 00:04:35,902 --> 00:04:37,403 No. 105 00:04:37,486 --> 00:04:39,113 Hey, your bones look all jacked out, Katie. 106 00:04:39,197 --> 00:04:41,157 Let me fix 'em. 107 00:04:45,411 --> 00:04:47,914 That no-good, two-timing harlot! 108 00:04:47,997 --> 00:04:49,415 Oh, let me see, Blake! 109 00:04:51,084 --> 00:04:52,126 Ugh! 110 00:04:52,210 --> 00:04:54,378 - Textbook nymphomaniac! - I knew it! 111 00:04:54,462 --> 00:04:56,464 Doesn't he know that caviar and corn dogs don't mix? 112 00:04:56,547 --> 00:05:00,051 You don't touch a Tigerclaw man's girl and expect to get away with it. 113 00:05:00,134 --> 00:05:05,139 Let's go smash those Camp Fire Ant fruitcakes into their graves. 114 00:05:05,223 --> 00:05:06,682 No, no, no. Not yet. 115 00:05:06,765 --> 00:05:08,893 We wait until after the formal tonight. 116 00:05:08,977 --> 00:05:12,605 Until then, you two continue your normal Tigerclaw camp activities. 117 00:05:12,688 --> 00:05:15,441 I've got something that I need to do. Go! Go, go, go, go! 118 00:05:24,951 --> 00:05:26,577 Thank you, Andy, but you can stop now. 119 00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:31,790 I have a boyfriend, and these are his shoulders, not yours. 120 00:05:31,875 --> 00:05:32,917 You're telling me you don't want 121 00:05:33,001 --> 00:05:35,461 to hack yourself off a slice of this long, greasy dick? 122 00:05:35,544 --> 00:05:38,589 - I told you I'm with Blake. - Blake can't blow your life like I can. 123 00:05:38,672 --> 00:05:40,133 You don't even know him. 124 00:05:40,216 --> 00:05:43,094 I know he's got a pair of duck boots jammed in his butthole. 125 00:05:45,096 --> 00:05:48,141 You'll come around, Katie, Duchess of Snobville. 126 00:05:50,518 --> 00:05:51,978 I know you will. 127 00:06:01,070 --> 00:06:02,571 I know you will. 128 00:06:05,449 --> 00:06:06,742 I know you will. 129 00:06:08,869 --> 00:06:10,413 You will. 130 00:06:18,671 --> 00:06:21,090 The only chance that we have of saving this camp for good 131 00:06:21,174 --> 00:06:23,509 is to get Xenstar to stop dumping that waste. 132 00:06:23,592 --> 00:06:25,428 Oh, what are we supposed to do? Call 'em up? 133 00:06:25,511 --> 00:06:27,138 "Hello, Xenstar, it's Beth. 134 00:06:27,221 --> 00:06:29,015 Could you please stop dumping waste in our camp? 135 00:06:29,098 --> 00:06:30,266 - It's very inconvenient..." - I get your point. 136 00:06:30,349 --> 00:06:32,560 You don't have to act out what the phone call would be. 137 00:06:32,643 --> 00:06:35,479 Now, we'll have to be more covert than that. 138 00:06:35,563 --> 00:06:37,190 First, we need proof that they're actually doing it. 139 00:06:37,273 --> 00:06:38,942 How about we hack into their mainframe computer? 140 00:06:39,025 --> 00:06:40,109 Oh, fat chance. 141 00:06:40,193 --> 00:06:43,780 A company like that's gonna have security protocols second only to Fort Knox. 142 00:06:43,862 --> 00:06:46,074 I mean, their protocols probably have protocols. 143 00:06:46,157 --> 00:06:47,158 That's a lot of protocols. 144 00:06:47,241 --> 00:06:49,118 We'd never be able to crack that code. 145 00:06:50,036 --> 00:06:51,495 Wait, code? 146 00:06:52,956 --> 00:06:55,624 That's what Mitch was saying when he was drowning in the toxic waste. 147 00:06:55,708 --> 00:06:57,126 "Get the code!" 148 00:06:57,210 --> 00:06:58,669 - Right! - But from who? 149 00:06:58,752 --> 00:07:01,672 Who would have access to top secret computer network codes? 150 00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:03,591 Someone with a military background, I'd think. 151 00:07:03,674 --> 00:07:07,761 Military background? Here? I mean, maybe a Boy Scout or two. 152 00:07:07,845 --> 00:07:09,638 Nurse Nancy down at the infirmary 153 00:07:09,722 --> 00:07:12,391 is a crossing guard during the school year, but... 154 00:07:13,935 --> 00:07:16,812 Actually, there is one person. 155 00:07:20,691 --> 00:07:24,195 ♪ Yes, I am dead ♪ 156 00:07:25,363 --> 00:07:29,700 ♪ Yes, I'm a ghost ♪ 157 00:07:30,451 --> 00:07:33,829 ♪ But I've still got the one thing ♪ 158 00:07:33,912 --> 00:07:36,790 ♪ I wanted the most ♪ 159 00:07:36,874 --> 00:07:39,502 - ♪ It's you! ♪ - ♪ It's you! ♪ 160 00:07:39,585 --> 00:07:42,546 - ♪ Feel the spark! ♪ - ♪ It's you! ♪ 161 00:07:44,048 --> 00:07:45,799 ♪ Feel the spark ♪ 162 00:07:45,883 --> 00:07:47,926 Stop! Stop! 163 00:07:48,011 --> 00:07:50,054 If I wanted to watch two people not perform, 164 00:07:50,138 --> 00:07:51,973 I would go to the not-theater. 165 00:07:52,056 --> 00:07:53,557 Is this a not-theater, Susie? 166 00:07:53,641 --> 00:07:55,684 No, sir. This is a yes-theater. 167 00:07:55,768 --> 00:07:57,145 Thank you, Susie. 168 00:07:57,228 --> 00:07:59,230 A yes-theater, which means that we say yes 169 00:07:59,313 --> 00:08:02,817 to 100% commitment 100% of the time. 170 00:08:02,900 --> 00:08:04,986 You got that, you two? Rhonda, walk them through it again. 171 00:08:05,069 --> 00:08:06,279 - My God. - All right. 172 00:08:06,362 --> 00:08:08,697 Becky, you're gonna do a three-steps giant leap. 173 00:08:08,781 --> 00:08:10,741 Right? Danny, you've gotta catch her full flight. 174 00:08:10,824 --> 00:08:13,036 None of this Busby-Berkeley- rah-rah-fun-fun stuff, okay? 175 00:08:13,119 --> 00:08:15,038 Think Fosse. Think Balanchine. Okay? 176 00:08:15,121 --> 00:08:17,706 Knock the knees, point the toes, gyrate and lead with the crotch. 177 00:08:17,790 --> 00:08:20,751 Good. All right, now. Take it from the pivot. 178 00:08:20,834 --> 00:08:21,877 Just the jump. 179 00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:24,046 Make it swing! 180 00:08:25,756 --> 00:08:27,091 - Ugh! - God damn it! 181 00:08:27,175 --> 00:08:28,467 I've seen better leaps from a year! 182 00:08:28,551 --> 00:08:30,636 ♪ Cattown lady chingle-chong ♪ 183 00:08:30,719 --> 00:08:32,763 ♪ Oh, the dooda day ♪ 184 00:08:32,846 --> 00:08:34,682 ♪ Needle in the doll Needle in the hay ♪ 185 00:08:34,765 --> 00:08:38,269 ♪ I put my bunny in a five-mile box Oh, the do-la hey! ♪ 186 00:08:38,352 --> 00:08:41,647 Make yourself scarce, Gary. We need to talk to JoJo. 187 00:08:41,730 --> 00:08:43,066 Why do I have to leave? 188 00:08:43,732 --> 00:08:46,069 Anything you have to say to me can be said in front of Gary. 189 00:08:46,902 --> 00:08:48,153 We have a problem. 190 00:08:48,237 --> 00:08:49,738 The problem's with Mitch. 191 00:08:49,822 --> 00:08:51,407 Long story short, 192 00:08:51,490 --> 00:08:53,201 {an8}he said he made a deal with Xenstar. 193 00:08:53,284 --> 00:08:57,663 {an8}We need you to hack into the government's mainframe computer and find proof of it. 194 00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:00,916 Mainframe? Hack? 195 00:09:00,999 --> 00:09:02,960 Proof? 196 00:09:03,044 --> 00:09:04,128 It? 197 00:09:05,088 --> 00:09:07,381 {an8}Why do you come to me for help? I'm just a camp chef. 198 00:09:07,465 --> 00:09:10,093 I don't know a mainframe from a picture frame. 199 00:09:10,176 --> 00:09:11,928 See, Beth, I told you. He's an idiot. 200 00:09:12,010 --> 00:09:13,679 He doesn't know his ass from a doorknob. 201 00:09:13,762 --> 00:09:17,141 Jonas, Mitch told me something in confidence once, 202 00:09:17,225 --> 00:09:18,976 I know you were in the military. 203 00:09:22,146 --> 00:09:24,690 - The 'Nam. - No way. 204 00:09:27,693 --> 00:09:30,738 I'm quite sure I don't know what you're talking about. 205 00:09:40,248 --> 00:09:42,458 I think you do know. 206 00:09:42,541 --> 00:09:44,502 What the fuck, dude? 207 00:09:44,585 --> 00:09:47,213 We need your help, Jonas. 208 00:09:47,296 --> 00:09:50,674 We need the secret passcode to access the government computer. 209 00:09:53,469 --> 00:09:55,012 Who's there? 210 00:10:01,310 --> 00:10:03,687 - Where's Mitch? - He's not here. 211 00:10:03,771 --> 00:10:04,980 I want to talk to Mitch! 212 00:10:05,063 --> 00:10:07,525 - Mitch is dead! - What? 213 00:10:07,608 --> 00:10:10,111 Mitch is dead? I just saw him like an hour ago. 214 00:10:10,194 --> 00:10:11,862 Well, he died more recently than that. 215 00:10:11,945 --> 00:10:14,782 He fell into a pool of toxic waste in the woods and now he's dead. 216 00:10:17,368 --> 00:10:19,870 No, I'm not. I'm right here. 217 00:10:19,953 --> 00:10:21,038 Mitch? 218 00:10:21,122 --> 00:10:22,707 Down here. 219 00:10:31,006 --> 00:10:33,509 This is me. 220 00:10:35,553 --> 00:10:36,929 Go! Go! Go! 221 00:10:37,012 --> 00:10:38,931 Wait, just... Cut it. Cut it. 222 00:10:43,602 --> 00:10:47,440 It's called a shofar. It's a religious horn. 223 00:10:47,523 --> 00:10:50,901 My girlfriend, Donna, got it for me from Jerushalayim. 224 00:10:50,984 --> 00:10:52,069 - Cool. - Yeah. 225 00:10:52,153 --> 00:10:53,529 Sounds pretty sweet. 226 00:10:53,612 --> 00:10:57,741 Makes me feel really special to have a girlfriend that gets me. 227 00:10:57,825 --> 00:10:58,867 You know? Like... 228 00:11:00,828 --> 00:11:02,371 Hey! Check it out, you guys. 229 00:11:02,455 --> 00:11:05,123 Horns from Israel. Donna got 'em for us. 230 00:11:05,208 --> 00:11:06,209 Donna gave you those? 231 00:11:06,292 --> 00:11:08,627 Yeah. She's giving 'em to everybody like it's candy or something. 232 00:11:08,711 --> 00:11:10,170 They must sell 'em in packs over there. 233 00:11:10,254 --> 00:11:12,423 - Shofar dick sword fight! - Yeah. 234 00:11:12,506 --> 00:11:13,799 - En garde. - En garde. 235 00:11:15,343 --> 00:11:17,636 You stabbed me with your dick-like shofar! 236 00:11:22,015 --> 00:11:23,851 All right, now, everybody! 237 00:11:31,734 --> 00:11:33,486 What's up, buttercup? 238 00:11:33,569 --> 00:11:34,778 Blake? 239 00:11:37,531 --> 00:11:38,949 What are you doing here? 240 00:11:39,032 --> 00:11:41,285 I should be asking you the same thing. 241 00:11:41,369 --> 00:11:42,536 This is my bunk. 242 00:11:42,620 --> 00:11:44,413 Touché. 243 00:11:45,456 --> 00:11:47,750 You think of me favorably. 244 00:11:47,833 --> 00:11:50,002 Hey, that's my private diary. 245 00:11:50,085 --> 00:11:51,420 Aren't you happy to see me? 246 00:11:51,504 --> 00:11:56,759 You must be after toiling in frivolity all day with these people. 247 00:11:56,842 --> 00:12:00,220 - What do you mean "these people"? - Oh, don't make me say it. 248 00:12:00,304 --> 00:12:01,472 Say what? 249 00:12:01,555 --> 00:12:04,517 Katie, do you want to hang out with the future leaders of the world, 250 00:12:04,600 --> 00:12:06,560 or a bunch of sunburned Jews? 251 00:12:07,978 --> 00:12:09,104 That is really mean. 252 00:12:09,187 --> 00:12:10,188 Is it? 253 00:12:11,440 --> 00:12:12,900 Or does it just hit home? 254 00:12:14,485 --> 00:12:15,944 Think on it. 255 00:12:16,028 --> 00:12:17,863 Oh... 256 00:12:17,946 --> 00:12:19,573 And clean yourself up a bit 257 00:12:19,657 --> 00:12:22,242 before I show you off at the Tigerclaw formal tonight, will you? 258 00:12:23,201 --> 00:12:27,748 Maybe try a little rouge. Them cheeks are looking a little pallid. 259 00:12:27,831 --> 00:12:29,833 Another layer of base wouldn't kill you either. 260 00:12:29,917 --> 00:12:32,127 Well, I wanted to talk to you about that. I'm not sure I can go. 261 00:12:34,087 --> 00:12:35,255 They're putting on a musical 262 00:12:35,339 --> 00:12:38,342 and there's a big staff party afterwards at the Roundhouse and I want... 263 00:12:38,426 --> 00:12:39,677 Katie! 264 00:12:42,513 --> 00:12:45,474 Let me be perfectly clear. 265 00:12:45,558 --> 00:12:47,225 If you back out on the formal... 266 00:12:48,644 --> 00:12:50,145 you and me... 267 00:12:51,689 --> 00:12:53,023 we're toast. 268 00:12:54,442 --> 00:12:55,943 As in... 269 00:12:56,026 --> 00:12:58,571 burnt bread. 270 00:13:11,750 --> 00:13:16,046 Mitch, you're alive. I can't believe it. 271 00:13:16,129 --> 00:13:18,048 What happened to you? 272 00:13:18,131 --> 00:13:20,551 I remember sinking into the darkness. 273 00:13:20,634 --> 00:13:23,596 I felt my life draining away. Then, blackness. 274 00:13:23,679 --> 00:13:27,224 When I came to, I was moving back up, up towards life. 275 00:13:27,307 --> 00:13:31,354 I was alive, but... changed. 276 00:13:31,437 --> 00:13:33,021 I love you! 277 00:13:33,105 --> 00:13:34,940 I love you so much, it hurts. 278 00:13:37,234 --> 00:13:38,318 Get a room, already. 279 00:13:38,402 --> 00:13:40,696 Hey, wait, is nobody going to talk about how weird it is 280 00:13:40,779 --> 00:13:42,990 that Mitch is a can of vegetables? 281 00:13:43,073 --> 00:13:44,658 It's really weird for me, too. 282 00:13:44,742 --> 00:13:47,328 Look, I hope you guys find what you're looking for, I really do. 283 00:13:47,411 --> 00:13:50,414 But if you'll excuse me, I have a wedding to attend to. 284 00:13:50,498 --> 00:13:51,540 My wedding. 285 00:13:51,624 --> 00:13:53,291 Jonas? 286 00:13:54,251 --> 00:13:56,754 I told you I'd keep your secrets when I hired you, 287 00:13:56,837 --> 00:14:00,132 but now I need you to access the memory banks of your brain 288 00:14:00,215 --> 00:14:02,175 and tell us the secret access code 289 00:14:02,259 --> 00:14:05,053 that will break into the government's secret computer network. 290 00:14:05,137 --> 00:14:08,391 If you don't, we'll lose the camp. Forever. 291 00:14:08,474 --> 00:14:11,560 Jonas, you gotta help us. Think about the kids. 292 00:14:14,813 --> 00:14:18,692 You're opening a can of worms you might not be able to close. 293 00:14:18,776 --> 00:14:20,110 Don't tell me about cans. 294 00:14:20,193 --> 00:14:23,321 I know about cans. Believe me. I am one. 295 00:14:23,406 --> 00:14:25,282 So, what'll it be, JoJo? 296 00:14:25,366 --> 00:14:28,494 Are you part of the problem, or are you the solution? 297 00:14:32,706 --> 00:14:35,501 I'm hoping for solution. 298 00:14:48,221 --> 00:14:49,432 I got you a present. 299 00:14:49,515 --> 00:14:54,102 Oh, a shofar. Donna, yofi, this is wonderful. 300 00:14:54,186 --> 00:14:55,187 Thank you. 301 00:14:55,270 --> 00:14:57,605 The shofar symbolizes many things. 302 00:14:57,690 --> 00:14:59,900 Strength, joy, love. 303 00:14:59,983 --> 00:15:03,320 Those are beautiful words, Donna. 304 00:15:03,404 --> 00:15:06,031 It really feels good to speak my truth with you. 305 00:15:22,923 --> 00:15:24,550 Donna, hey. 306 00:15:25,175 --> 00:15:28,053 Can I, uh, talk to you privately for a second? 307 00:15:28,679 --> 00:15:30,598 Um, sure. 308 00:15:30,681 --> 00:15:33,517 Girls, girls, girls. Save that for the bedroom. 309 00:15:33,601 --> 00:15:35,478 Hey, what's up? 310 00:15:35,561 --> 00:15:37,771 I can't figure you out. That's what's up. 311 00:15:37,855 --> 00:15:40,232 Hey, Coop, where's this anger coming from? 312 00:15:40,315 --> 00:15:43,486 You gave me a shofar, Donna. You told me it was special. 313 00:15:43,569 --> 00:15:44,570 It is special and... 314 00:15:44,653 --> 00:15:47,615 You said all that stuff to me about strength, love, joy. 315 00:15:47,698 --> 00:15:49,450 You said I was the only person you said that to, 316 00:15:49,533 --> 00:15:50,951 and then you said it to Yaron, too. 317 00:15:51,034 --> 00:15:54,079 Oh, so now you're one of those people who opposes the First Amendment? 318 00:15:54,162 --> 00:15:57,207 I mean, freedom of speech? God, that's a privilege, Coop. 319 00:15:57,290 --> 00:15:58,626 Don't you realize how lucky we are? 320 00:15:58,709 --> 00:16:00,211 Yeah, I... 321 00:16:00,293 --> 00:16:02,838 You know, you can be a real asshole sometimes, Coop. 322 00:16:08,218 --> 00:16:09,386 Donna! 323 00:16:24,693 --> 00:16:28,196 - What's he doing? - Sometimes, to access buried memories, 324 00:16:28,280 --> 00:16:30,115 you have to go back to the beginning of your life. 325 00:16:30,198 --> 00:16:31,784 Start from scratch. 326 00:16:31,867 --> 00:16:34,036 Oh, Mummy, what a pretty, pretty kitty. 327 00:16:34,119 --> 00:16:37,080 But I don't want to go to the workhouse. 328 00:16:37,164 --> 00:16:41,376 Coach, I know it's only Pee Wee and I've got these spindly legs, 329 00:16:41,459 --> 00:16:43,045 but I'd sure like to get into a game... 330 00:16:43,128 --> 00:16:46,131 Jenny, you want to go to the prom with me? 331 00:16:46,214 --> 00:16:49,176 Hey, man, want a dime bag? 332 00:16:49,259 --> 00:16:51,428 - All right, Jonas. - Shh! 333 00:16:51,512 --> 00:16:52,930 Sorry I've disappointed you, Father. 334 00:16:53,013 --> 00:16:55,182 That's why I'm enlisting in the Merchant Marines. 335 00:16:55,265 --> 00:16:58,894 Sir! Reporting for duty, sir! 336 00:16:58,977 --> 00:17:01,647 Charlie Bravo! Incoming, incoming! 337 00:17:01,730 --> 00:17:03,941 Light 'em up! 338 00:17:05,233 --> 00:17:09,947 Sir! I will defend the network access code, sir! 339 00:17:10,030 --> 00:17:11,031 The code is 340 00:17:11,114 --> 00:17:15,619 5-7-9-8-Delta-Alpha-N- 341 00:17:15,703 --> 00:17:18,205 Alpha-November-Tango-Echo- 342 00:17:18,288 --> 00:17:21,416 Niner-1-7-5-6-2-0- 343 00:17:21,499 --> 00:17:26,463 Alpha-Papa-H-India-Alpha-4-3-7. 344 00:17:26,547 --> 00:17:27,756 Got it! 345 00:17:30,884 --> 00:17:32,510 Hell of a job, Jonas. 346 00:17:32,595 --> 00:17:34,138 Jonas? 347 00:17:36,306 --> 00:17:37,600 Are you okay? 348 00:17:37,683 --> 00:17:40,853 Yes, thank you. 349 00:17:40,936 --> 00:17:45,357 Jonas. That's me. Jonas Jurgensen. I'm a camp chef and in love with Gail. 350 00:17:53,281 --> 00:17:54,282 Hey, you. 351 00:17:55,826 --> 00:17:57,244 Can I come in? 352 00:17:58,912 --> 00:17:59,913 I guess so. 353 00:18:07,630 --> 00:18:09,214 Listen. 354 00:18:09,297 --> 00:18:10,423 I've been thinking about it, 355 00:18:10,507 --> 00:18:13,343 and I'm really sorry about what happened back there with the shofar. 356 00:18:13,426 --> 00:18:14,719 You know, the bottom line is you're right. 357 00:18:14,803 --> 00:18:17,055 I shouldn't have acted that way. 358 00:18:18,223 --> 00:18:21,351 But it's just, you have such a strong influence on me, Coop. 359 00:18:21,434 --> 00:18:24,146 I mean, do you understand what I'm talking about? 360 00:18:24,229 --> 00:18:26,774 Um, maybe elaborate so that I can be sure. 361 00:18:26,857 --> 00:18:28,566 Okay. 362 00:18:28,651 --> 00:18:34,531 Your energy feather allowed my energy feather to find its voice. 363 00:18:34,615 --> 00:18:38,827 So once I had the strength to open up to someone, 364 00:18:38,911 --> 00:18:40,537 well, then I could open up to someone else, 365 00:18:40,621 --> 00:18:43,916 and Yaron just happened to be the first person that I bumped into 366 00:18:43,999 --> 00:18:47,044 with this newfound energy plumage. 367 00:18:47,127 --> 00:18:52,465 So, in a way, thank you. Coop, thank you. 368 00:18:52,549 --> 00:18:55,719 Um, well, you're welcome. 369 00:18:57,095 --> 00:18:59,056 I got you something. 370 00:18:59,139 --> 00:19:00,432 - Really? - Yeah. 371 00:19:00,515 --> 00:19:03,435 - Another gift? - Yep. 372 00:19:05,020 --> 00:19:06,730 Wow, a hat. 373 00:19:06,814 --> 00:19:08,816 Do you like it? I got it for you in the East Village. 374 00:19:08,899 --> 00:19:09,942 It feels a little small. 375 00:19:10,025 --> 00:19:12,235 God, it looks so cool. I really want you to wear it. 376 00:19:12,319 --> 00:19:13,320 It feels small. 377 00:19:13,403 --> 00:19:14,947 It does? It looks great. 378 00:19:15,030 --> 00:19:16,156 It'll go perfectly with this. 379 00:19:16,239 --> 00:19:18,241 Oh, a shirt. 380 00:19:18,325 --> 00:19:20,452 - So cool. - Shiny. 381 00:19:20,535 --> 00:19:22,705 I want you to wear it to the show tonight. 382 00:19:23,997 --> 00:19:25,666 - Okay. - Coop? 383 00:19:25,749 --> 00:19:30,087 I'm so sorry. Can you forgive me? 384 00:19:30,170 --> 00:19:34,257 Donna, of course I forgive you. 385 00:19:34,341 --> 00:19:38,428 You're my girlfriend, and we're in a serious relationship. 386 00:19:40,764 --> 00:19:42,558 Can I kiss you? 387 00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:43,726 What? 388 00:19:43,809 --> 00:19:45,978 I said, "Can I kiss you?" 389 00:19:47,354 --> 00:19:49,647 - Yeah. - Okay. 390 00:19:50,899 --> 00:19:52,818 - Are you doing it? - Yeah, I'm gonna do it right now. 391 00:19:55,362 --> 00:19:57,239 Ooh! 392 00:19:57,322 --> 00:19:59,783 You guys are here again? 393 00:19:59,867 --> 00:20:01,910 - So weird. - I know. 394 00:20:03,328 --> 00:20:05,080 Again! 395 00:20:05,163 --> 00:20:08,541 I need to see some daylight between those chubby thighs, Becky. 396 00:20:08,625 --> 00:20:09,877 Do it again! 397 00:20:09,960 --> 00:20:11,169 Arch your body! 398 00:20:14,006 --> 00:20:15,841 Shit! Abraham! 399 00:20:15,924 --> 00:20:17,050 Someone call an ambulance! 400 00:20:17,134 --> 00:20:21,138 We have four hours until the show, Claude, and these guys suck dick. 401 00:20:21,805 --> 00:20:22,848 What are we gonna do? 402 00:20:23,681 --> 00:20:26,601 I'm not quite sure, Susie. All right, let's take five! 403 00:20:26,684 --> 00:20:27,895 You heard Claude! Take five! 404 00:20:32,858 --> 00:20:37,279 Guys, come on. Just tell me. What's in that cabin? 405 00:20:38,030 --> 00:20:40,741 I mean, you've got to tell me, what is going on with that cabin? 406 00:20:40,824 --> 00:20:42,450 Okay, 407 00:20:42,534 --> 00:20:46,121 I heard a rumor that Eric used to live there. 408 00:20:46,204 --> 00:20:47,289 But then he died. 409 00:20:47,372 --> 00:20:48,623 Eric? Who's Eric? 410 00:20:48,706 --> 00:20:51,752 I heard he still lives there. But he's half werewolf, half dog. 411 00:20:51,835 --> 00:20:53,003 What? Who is this guy? 412 00:20:53,086 --> 00:20:54,755 Okay, you guys. Fine. 413 00:20:56,339 --> 00:21:00,052 Look, I know the real story about Eric, but... 414 00:21:01,261 --> 00:21:03,096 you probably don't want to hear it. 415 00:21:03,180 --> 00:21:04,306 - What? We do. - No, we do wanna hear it. 416 00:21:04,389 --> 00:21:05,432 Tell us. 417 00:21:05,515 --> 00:21:07,600 - Tell it. - Come on, tell it. 418 00:21:07,684 --> 00:21:09,352 Tell it. I want to hear it. Definitely, tell it. 419 00:21:09,436 --> 00:21:10,478 We were just talking about it. 420 00:21:10,562 --> 00:21:12,480 - You have to tell it. - Tell it. 421 00:21:12,564 --> 00:21:14,357 - Tell it. - Tell it. 422 00:21:14,441 --> 00:21:16,443 - You have to tell it. - Come on, tell it. 423 00:21:16,526 --> 00:21:18,111 Okay, okay, okay, guys. 424 00:21:18,195 --> 00:21:21,739 So, the version of the story that I heard goes like this. 425 00:21:23,450 --> 00:21:27,079 Eric was a counselor at Camp Firewood back in the mid '70s. 426 00:21:27,162 --> 00:21:29,622 - And he was, like, a guitar prodigy. - Mmm-hmm. 427 00:21:29,706 --> 00:21:33,126 And he was in a band, called the Rockin' Knights of Summer. 428 00:21:33,210 --> 00:21:34,252 Knights! Knights! 429 00:21:34,336 --> 00:21:38,673 So the legend goes that the dad of one of the kids at camp that year 430 00:21:38,756 --> 00:21:42,219 was an A&R guy for Columbia Records. 431 00:21:42,302 --> 00:21:44,054 And the night of the talent show, 432 00:21:44,137 --> 00:21:45,764 he came and saw Eric play, 433 00:21:45,848 --> 00:21:49,642 and the band played their most popular song. 434 00:21:49,726 --> 00:21:52,896 - "Turn It Up"? - Exactly, "Turn It Up." 435 00:21:58,026 --> 00:22:03,198 So this A&R guy just completely, like, flips his lid! 436 00:22:04,491 --> 00:22:05,742 ♪ Turn it up ♪ 437 00:22:05,826 --> 00:22:09,621 He signs Eric and the band to a record deal on the spot. 438 00:22:09,704 --> 00:22:13,834 And he puts the band on tour opening for the J. Geils Band. 439 00:22:13,917 --> 00:22:15,836 The J. Geils Band? No way! 440 00:22:15,919 --> 00:22:18,755 I am not lying to you, Jeremy, you piece of shit! 441 00:22:18,839 --> 00:22:19,882 Then what happened? 442 00:22:20,548 --> 00:22:22,092 Well, things started to unravel. 443 00:22:22,175 --> 00:22:24,887 Eric and the band rent this old house upstate, 444 00:22:24,970 --> 00:22:26,804 and he just starts laying down tracks, you know? 445 00:22:26,889 --> 00:22:28,974 He's trying to write this sonic masterpiece. 446 00:22:30,934 --> 00:22:34,479 And that is when Eric just lost his shit. 447 00:22:37,524 --> 00:22:39,651 Hey, hey! Stop it! What did I tell you, man? 448 00:22:39,734 --> 00:22:40,818 Come in on the down beat. 449 00:22:40,903 --> 00:22:43,406 JD, one more time! Again! Again! 450 00:22:43,488 --> 00:22:45,657 No matter what the band did, 451 00:22:45,740 --> 00:22:47,409 Eric was never satisfied. 452 00:22:48,660 --> 00:22:50,620 - Again, JD! - Okay. 453 00:22:50,703 --> 00:22:52,080 Again and again and again! 454 00:22:53,040 --> 00:22:54,832 I've got nothing left. 455 00:22:56,834 --> 00:22:58,878 The muse is gone. 456 00:23:01,464 --> 00:23:03,300 So Eric just walks out of that studio, 457 00:23:03,383 --> 00:23:08,721 and he got into his car and he drove all the way back to Camp Firewood. 458 00:23:08,805 --> 00:23:11,641 No one ever heard those recordings. 459 00:23:12,935 --> 00:23:14,894 And then he just disappeared 460 00:23:14,978 --> 00:23:16,729 into that abandoned cabin where he still lives today. 461 00:23:16,813 --> 00:23:18,606 Or at least that's how the story goes. 462 00:23:18,690 --> 00:23:20,025 I mean, no one's ever seen him. 463 00:23:21,443 --> 00:23:25,822 It's sad, too. 'Cause, I mean, he was going to be huge. 464 00:23:25,905 --> 00:23:27,449 Second rule of journalism? 465 00:23:27,532 --> 00:23:29,617 Sometimes stories have chapters. 466 00:23:29,701 --> 00:23:33,080 I think I just found my chapter one, "Eric." 467 00:23:35,248 --> 00:23:37,835 He's like this mythical beast in a bunk. 468 00:23:37,917 --> 00:23:41,421 It sounds like a great story, but save it for the article. 469 00:23:41,504 --> 00:23:45,842 And hey, word of warning, don't get too close. 470 00:23:47,844 --> 00:23:49,679 Too close? 471 00:23:49,762 --> 00:23:54,642 I didn't know it then, but I would become closer to this story than I ever imagined. 472 00:23:54,726 --> 00:23:57,895 Phone's for emergencies only, young lady. 473 00:23:57,980 --> 00:24:00,148 Oh, yeah. Uh, that was an emergency. 474 00:24:00,232 --> 00:24:02,985 I, um... forgot... 475 00:24:04,027 --> 00:24:06,363 my diaphragm, so... 476 00:24:06,446 --> 00:24:07,947 My dad's gonna send it to me. 477 00:24:08,031 --> 00:24:10,659 That was him on the phone. 478 00:24:10,742 --> 00:24:13,203 It's a mixed marriage. That's why he's black. 479 00:24:13,953 --> 00:24:15,372 - Lindsay? - Mmm-hmm? 480 00:24:15,455 --> 00:24:19,501 Believe it or not, I was your age once, I get it. 481 00:24:19,584 --> 00:24:21,961 Here, take mine. 482 00:24:30,845 --> 00:24:32,639 You're a real pal, Nurse Nancy. 483 00:24:39,396 --> 00:24:43,066 Steve, I need you to stop playing with that typewriter and that TV screen 484 00:24:43,150 --> 00:24:45,360 and help us with something on the camp computer. 485 00:24:45,443 --> 00:24:47,279 Uh, Beth, I think that is the computer. 486 00:24:47,362 --> 00:24:49,072 Can you hack into the government's mainframe? 487 00:24:49,156 --> 00:24:51,616 Does not compute. Logging onto government mainframe 488 00:24:51,699 --> 00:24:54,744 requires a secret military alphanumeric password. 489 00:24:54,827 --> 00:24:56,746 Try this. 490 00:24:56,829 --> 00:24:58,415 We're in. 491 00:24:58,498 --> 00:25:00,917 My God, it's not just toxic waste. 492 00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:04,296 Xenstar has been doing the government's dirty work for years. 493 00:25:04,379 --> 00:25:07,799 Arms smuggling, targeted assassinations, regime overthrow. 494 00:25:07,882 --> 00:25:10,677 If there's something bad to be done, Xenstar's been doing it. 495 00:25:10,760 --> 00:25:12,053 Steve, print out that matrix, would you? 496 00:25:18,893 --> 00:25:19,894 Just as I suspected. 497 00:25:19,977 --> 00:25:21,104 What is it? 498 00:25:21,188 --> 00:25:23,273 This conspiracy goes a lot higher than we thought. 499 00:25:23,356 --> 00:25:25,817 The only question is, just how high? 500 00:25:41,291 --> 00:25:43,000 Can I have five minutes with the president? 501 00:25:43,085 --> 00:25:45,878 President Reagan is busy right now. 502 00:25:45,962 --> 00:25:47,964 Mr. President, we have a problem. 503 00:25:48,548 --> 00:25:49,591 Eh? 504 00:25:49,674 --> 00:25:52,094 Two high-ranking counselors at Camp Firewood 505 00:25:52,177 --> 00:25:53,720 have hacked into the mainframe. 506 00:25:53,803 --> 00:25:56,598 - And these are head counselors? - Yes, sir. 507 00:25:56,681 --> 00:26:01,103 They know that Xenstar is dumping toxic waste into the water supply, 508 00:26:01,186 --> 00:26:04,106 which means pretty soon they'll know about us. 509 00:26:04,897 --> 00:26:06,065 Then handle it. 510 00:26:06,149 --> 00:26:10,069 Mr. President, you want me to activate the Falcon? 511 00:26:10,987 --> 00:26:14,073 If we do, we may not be able to control the situation. 512 00:26:14,157 --> 00:26:16,493 I said handle it! 513 00:26:20,788 --> 00:26:21,998 Yes, Mr. Pres... 514 00:26:46,022 --> 00:26:47,774 They're ready for you, Mr. President. 515 00:26:47,857 --> 00:26:50,193 Well, let's go get 'em. 516 00:26:58,576 --> 00:27:03,122 Ah! General Secretary Brezhnev, 517 00:27:03,206 --> 00:27:05,375 I hope you like quiche. 518 00:27:12,424 --> 00:27:17,512 {an8}Falcon, you are activated. The instructions are in the usual place.