*Oh, the weather outside is frightful*
*But the fire is so delightful*
*And since we've no place to go*
*Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow*
*Man, it doesn't show signs of stopping*
*And I brought me some corn for popping*
*The lights are turned way down low*
*Let it snow, let it snow*
*When we finally kiss goodnight*
*How I'll hate going out in the storm*
*But if you really hold me tight*
*All the way home I'll be warm*
*Oh, the fire is slowly dying*
翻译：泽生 独醉
*And my dear, we're still goodbye-ing*
校对&总监：泽生
我的天 Oh! Oh, my god!
时间轴&后期：加森
起来 今天是圣诞节 Oh, get up! It's Christmas day!
出什么事了 我为什么穿着圣诞老人的衣服 What is happening? Why am I wearing a santa suit?!
我不知道 不知道 I don't know. I don't know.
但孩子们随时会醒来 But the kids are gonna be up any minute now.
为什么家里有只狗 Why is there a dog in here?!
我不知道 这是你家 I don't know. It's your house.
为什么会有只狗 Why there a dog in here?
你在这里做什么 What are you doing here?
我不知道 我在这里做什么 I don't know. What I doing here?
哇 宿醉之城 Whoa! Hangover city.
老天爷 Geez.
-别害怕 -什么事 - Okay, just don't freak out. - What?
你没事 Y-you're fine.
杰姬 你脸上发生了非常可怕的事 Jackie, something terrible has happened to your face.
才没 什么 不要 No. What?! Nuh-unh!
眉毛会重新长出来的 对吗 Oh! They're gonna grow back, right?
-是的 -我等不及要看看有什么礼物 - Yeah. - I can't wait to see what happened!
是孩子们 It's the kids.
你们好 Hey, guys.
我的老天爷 Holy crap.
出什么事了 What happened?
圣诞快乐 Merry Christmas.
-圣诞快乐 -圣诞快乐 - Merry christmas! - Merry christmas.
■
本字幕由人人影视字幕组翻译 禁止用作任何商业盈利行为
三妻喜事 第一季 第十集
我们家这是怎么了 What happened to our house?
我的星星 圣诞树 Oh, my stars! The tree!
别看 波特 别看 Look away, Bert! Look away!
这是什么 What is that?!
它很友好 只是想打个招呼 He's friendly. He just wants to get to know you.
来吧 我的小天使 Come on, my little angel.
我们走 看看烧焦的树下有什么 Yeah, let's go! Let's go look at our burning tree, guys!
-快走 -你们真厉害 - Come on! Go! Go! - Great job, you guys.
昨晚发生了什么事 What happened last night? I mean...
我不记得了 I don't remember.
我也是 什么都不记得了 Neither do I. Not a thing.
唯一一次 The only other time
我这样不省人事 还是抽了鸦片 I've ever blacked out like that was from opium.
当时在摩洛哥 那是一种习俗 It was in Morocco. It was customary.
我只是入乡随俗 I was being polite.
先回想下我们还记得的 Let's go back to what we do remember.
-老天 -好主意 聪明 - Oh, god. - Ooh, yes. Good idea. Smart.
我记得我之前有眉毛 Um, I remember I had eyebrows.
我记得我在调酒 Yeah, and I remember I was making drinks.
你每天不都做这件事吗 Well, isn't that what you every day?
12
小时
之前
想看小把戏吗 You want to see a trick?
当然 Sure.
太酷了 That's so cool!
你是怎么学会的 How do you know how to do that?
上学学的 I went to school for it --
凡奈斯调酒学院 The Van Nuys institute of mixology.
我也想去 That's where I want to go!
我这辈子最棒的两周 Oh, best two weeks of my life.
我只想说 郑重声明 I just want to say for the record --
哼 骗子 Bah, humbug.
我就知道不应该让你去商场 I knew we shouldn't have sent you to the mall.
我看到一个女人把另一个女人绊倒 I saw a woman trip another woman
就为了抢一个戴大厨帽的艾蒙[芝麻街玩偶] to get to an Elmo wearing a chef's hat.
这下可好 Oh, great.
霍琳点亮了她的装饰 Helene's powered up her decorations.
她又加了一个耶稣诞生场景 You know, she added another nativity scene.
已经三个了 如果算的话 有九个智者了 That's three. That's nine wise men, if you count.
放轻松 她喜欢为圣诞节做装饰 Take it easy. She likes to decorate for Christmas.
在太空都能看到她的房子 You can see that house from space.
什么味道 What's that smell?
-我在做格拉格酒 -格勒格 - Oh, I'm making glogg. - Glug?
-格拉格 -格勒格 - Glogg. - Glag?
-格拉格 -我们这是在干嘛呢 - Glogg. - What are we doing?
这是加香料的热葡萄酒 我想着 It's mulled wine. I just thought, you know,
这是我们共度的第一个圣诞节 It's my first Christmas with you,
我想融入一些 and I wanted to incorporate
我们瑞典家族的传统 some of my swedish family traditions.
两个人喝这些太多了吧 Isn't this a lot for just the two of us?
事实上我请了一些客人 Yeah, um...I actually invited some people,
你认识的人 Uh, people you've met,
你也许娶过 或是没娶过的人 people you may or may not have been married to.
凯特 我们谈过的 Kate, we talked about this.
我们有严格的假日轮流制度 We have a very strict holiday rotation.
今年是我们的 三个孩子跟我们过节 This is our year. We have the three kids.
不要黛安 不要杰姬 No Diane and no Jackie.
我知道 皮特 但听我说 I know, Pete. And you know what?
一年364天 我都支持你 364 days out of the year, I'm totally on your side.
但这是圣诞节 宝贝 家人应该团聚 But it's Christmas, babe. Family should be together.
好吧 Okay, fine.
给她们一块饼干 一杯葡萄酒 We'll give them a cookie, glass of wine,
发啦啦 她们走人 fa la la, out the door they go.
别担心 小气鬼 没事的 Don't worry, scrooge. It'll be great.
给 喝吧 Here. Drink up.
瞧 她的确逢人就劝酒 See? She was pushing that on everybody.
你有什么目的 凯特 W-w-what was your angle, Kate?
让大家酩酊大醉 To get us all so drunk
你可以保持清醒 试穿我的鲁布托名牌鞋吗 so you could stay up and try on my louboutins?
我看到你看着它们的眼光了 I've seen the way you look at them.
有可能是试穿我的鹿皮鞋 It was probably to try on my moccasins.
我也看到你看着它们的眼光了 Yeah, I've see the way you look at them.
我只想大家过一个开心的圣诞节 I just wanted us to have a nice Christmas.
我讨厌那些格拉格酒 Well, I for one, hated the glogg.
我爱死这个格拉格了 I love this glogg!
你得把配方告诉我 麻利点 You have to give me the recipe, pronto.
那是意大利语"快点"的意思 Oh, that's Italian for "Arriba, arriba!"
Arriba为西班牙语
大家真的很享受 You know, everyone's really feeling
我营造的这种家人团聚的感觉 this family-togetherness thing that I created.
这对你来说意义重大 对吗 It really means a lot to you, doesn't it?
是的 Yeah.
我成长的过程中没有享受过这种感觉 I mean, I never had this growing up.
事实上有一年圣诞节 Actually, one Christmas,
我们只有一张圣诞树的照片 we only had a picture of a Christmas tree.
就这么大 非常非常小 It was, like, this big. It was really, really small.
妈妈 你的姜饼屋太棒了 Mom, your gingerbread house is amazing.
-真不错 -这是建筑大师莱特的作品 - Wow. Pretty sweet. - It's a Frank Lloyd Wright,
无谷蛋白 结构稳健 gluten-free, and structurally sound.
哇 知道吗 Wow. Oh, hey -- you know, the only thing
这件大师之作 唯一缺的 missing from this masterful creation
就是姜饼狗窝 is a gingerbread doghouse.
-是的 -请听言下之意 - Yes. - Hint. Hint.
请听言下之意 Hint. Hint.
如果你们真的弄到一只狗 Well, if you do get a dog,
你们就会知道圣诞老人是真实存在的 you'll know Santa's real,
因为我永远不会为你们买狗 'cause I'd never get you one.
请听言下之意 Hint. Hint.
能不能来个人帮我点亮 Can someone help me light
光明节烛台 the Hanukkah menorah...
宽扎节烛台和排灯节蜡烛 And the Kwanzaa kinara and Diwali diya?
我的袖子是个火灾隐患 My bell sleeves are a real fire hazard.
好的 Uh, yeah.
我打算一下子欢庆所有的节日 You know, I'm celebrating every holiday this season
这样波特不会困惑 so Bert's less confused.
这周的重点是耶稣的生日 This week is about Jesus' birthday,
八天的灯油 涅盘的实现 eight days of oil, the attainment of nirvana,
黑人非常了不起 and black people being awesome.
别忘了 我还在为斋月斋戒 And don't forget that I'm fasting for Ramadan, too.
你知道斋戒意思是不吃东西吧 You do know that fasting means not eating, right?
现在是过节 It's the holidays.
我想我们还有钱 I mean, I think we can afford
给自己买点好吃的 to treat ourselves a little.
让孩子们睡觉后 记忆就模糊了 It all starts to get fuzzy after we put the kids to bed.
我记得告诉他们 Yes, I remember telling them
早上之前不准出房间 not to come out of their rooms till morning
否则圣诞老人送的礼物不会超过40块 or Santa wouldn't bring them anything over $40.
然后我记得黛安摔倒了 And then I remember Diane falling.
我没有摔倒 从来没有过 No, I didn't fall. I never fall.
我学走路的事我记得 I remember when I learned to walk.
立刻就会走了 It was instant.
孩子们睡觉了 Well, the kids are asleep,
我想我还是走吧 so I guess I'd better be going.
黛安 Diane.
-你没事吧 -你没事吧 - Are you okay? - Are you okay?
不 我没事 我没事 Oh, no. I'm okay. I'm okay.
你还好吗 Are you okay?
-黛安 你喝醉了 -什么 - Diane, y-you're -- you're smashed. - What?
你就这样 "啊" 砰然倒地 No, I'm -- you're like, "Aah!" Bam!
你一定得把这个格洛格的配方给我 You must give me the recipe for that glurg.
-格拉格 -格洛格 - Glogg. - Glurg.
－中间音是"拉" 格拉格 -格洛格 － It's like "Glo," Glogg. - Glurg.
格拉格 黛安 是格拉格 Glorg, Diane. Glorg.
都怪凯特愚蠢的格拉格 So, it was Kate's stupid glogg
害我们成这样的 that made us like this.
酒里有什么 What was in that wine?
主要是葡萄干 It was mostly raisins.
好吧 但那些葡萄干里有什么 凯特 Yes, but what was in those raisins, Kate?
你做什么 What are you doing?
证明我不是罪魁祸首 I'm proving I didn't do this.
看 Look.
这就是我们喝的酒 This is all that we drank, okay?
加上一些丁香和橙皮 With some cloves and orange peel.
-就是这样 -这是一瓶苦艾酒 - That's it. - And this bottle of absinthe.
我们与"绿色精灵"共舞了一曲 We danced with the green fairy.
上面全是你的大名 赖不掉的 This has your name written all over it.
才没有 黛安 No, it doesn't, Diane.
噢 真有的啊 Oh, it does.
但我根本不知道我们为什么会有这个 Yeah, but I don't even know how it got here.
那为什么这个会加进鸡尾酒里 Well, then how did it get in the punch?
你为什么穿着半身圣诞老人的衣服 And why are you in half a Santa suit?
最重要的是 And most importantly...
我现在就成这样了吗 is this who I am now?
那只狗在波特的桌子上咬了个洞 Guys, the dog just chewed a hole through Bert's desk!
你们说了想要狗 Well, you said you wanted a dog.
不是那种的 Not the kind!
你们告诉我们礼物在哪里 Now, if you could direct us to the presents,
我们想拆礼物 希望这不麻烦你们 we'd like to open them, if that's not too much trouble.
对 我爱礼物 Yeah, I love presents.
当然 Sure.
礼物在哪里 Where are they?
不见了 They're gone!
你们是说 You mean...
不要啊 N-o-o-o-o-o-o!!
找到了吗 Did you find them yet?
没有 才找了30秒呢 No, but it's only been 30 seconds.
现在呢 How about now?
冷静点 年轻的消费者 Cool your shorts, my young consumer.
礼物们 你们在哪里 Hello? Presents? Where are you?
没事的 各位 You know what? It's fine, you guys.
我们会去照片分享网上 We'll just go on instagram
看看我们朋友们礼物的照片 and look at pictures of our friends' presents.
-是的 -我们走 波特 - Yeah. - Let's go, Bert.
你们呢 找到什么了吗 How about you guys? You find anything?
-我到处都找遍了 -你没有 - I looked everywhere. - No, you didn't.
你喷了凯特的香水 You put on Kate's perfume
在镜子前翩翩起舞 and danced in front of the mirror.
我到处都找遍了 I looked everywhere.
别吵架 记住 这全是她的错 Let's not fight. Remember, this is all her fault.
什么 不 What? No.
我只是希望圣诞节时大家能聚在一起 I just wanted us all to be together on Christmas.
这里怎么有纸屑 And what's with this confetti?
这是雪花 Oh, this is snow!
我记得你说需要这个 Yeah, I think you were saying you needed it
来创造冬日奇境什么的 for our winter wonderland or something.
什么 What?
好吧 冬日奇境 Okay, "Winter wonderland"?
我永远不会说这种话 太差劲了 I would never say that. That's so lame.
我相当肯定你说了 I'm pretty sure you did.
-你为什么要碎这些纸 -我没有 - Why would you shred all this? - I didn't.
我甚至不知道我们有碎纸机 I didn't even know we had a shredder.
你都住一年了 Been living here a year,
居然不知道我们有碎纸机吗 you didn't realize we had a shredder?
我再强调一遍 她每天都在做什么 And I say, again, what does she do all day?
这里是冬日奇境 It's a winter wonderland!
瞧 就说了你说过 承认吧 See? Told ya you said it. Face.
这是我那个植物园案子的档案 This is my case against the botanical garden.
谁干的 谁干的 Who did this? Who did this?!
我做了 我在碎文件 I'm doing it! I am shredding my files!
好样的 宝贝 Good for you, baby.
我已经厌倦消费者权益保护了 I'm done with the consumerism.
如果我不再挣钱 我们就自由了 If I stop making money, we're free.
再见 腐败案件 You know, bye-- bye-bye, corrupt case.
再会 没有灵魂的工作 Toodle-oo, soulless job.
我们结婚前 Hey, you've been singing that song
你就在唱这首歌了 姐妹 since before we were married, sister.
知道吗 You know what?
我要给道格打电话 I'm gonna call Doug...
现在就打 我要告诉他 ...right now, and I am gonna tell him
我不再为他否认气候变化了 that he does not have me to deny climate change anymore.
语音信箱 Voicemail.
道格 我是皮特 Uh, Doug, it's Pete.
你有必要回我电话 It would behoove you to call me back.
现在是凌晨1:47 It's 1:47 in the morning.
接下来48小时我都醒着 I'll be up for the next 48 hours.
太兴奋了 Oh. That was intoxicating!
太兴奋了 That was intoxicating!
-想真正嗨一下吗 -是的 - You want a real high? - Yeah.
给他回电话 Call him back.
是的 是的 Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
道格 我是皮特 现在是1:48 Hey, Doug! It's Pete! It's 1:48!
你为什么没有回我电话 Why didn't you call me back?!
再来一遍 Do it again.
好主意 That's a good idea.
道格 Doug!!
-我的天 -怎么啦 - Oh, my god. - What?
我在1:47-3:38之间 给他打了16个电话 I called him 16 times between 1:47 and 3:38.
你接通他了吗 你辞职了吗 Well, did you reach him? Did you quit?
我不知道 I-I don't know.
我想劝他来着 但他会听吗 Well, I tried to stop him, but does he listen?
我一辈子都这样被无视 Story of my life.
如果是道格 就说我不在 If it's Doug, I'm not here.
那个 你们好像偷了我的玛丽圣母像 So, I think you have my marys.
什么 我完全不知道你在说什么 What? I don't know what you're talking about.
她们在办茶话会呢 They're having a tea party.
那真是太有爱了 That's frigging adorable.
-那个女人 都是她干的 -什么 - That one. She did it. - What?!
别表现得这么惊讶 Oh, don't look so surprised.
我也忍不住 我的眉毛出了点问题 I can't help it. Something happened to my eyebrows.
等等 我们能接着说她做的错事吗 Hang on -- can we just go back to what she did wrong?
*叮叮当 叮叮当* *Jingle bells, jingle bells*
*铃铛真真多* *There are lots of bells*
*真多多 哎呀* *They're -- ooh. Uh, whoops.*
好吧 Okay.
*叮叮当* *Jingle bells*
不好意思 Oops. Sorry.
-嘘 -抱歉 - Ooh, Shh! - Sorry!
-你在干什么呢 -嘘 - What are you doing!? - Shh!
你会把耶稣宝宝吵醒的 You're gonna wake the baby Jesuses!
不 别嘘我 这是我的家 No! Don't shush me! This is my house!
我是为耶稣才让你噤声的 I'm shush-- shushing for Jesus!
所以我才偷回来的 因为这代表着我们三个 That's why I took them, 'cause it's the three of us.
是凯特 我 和 It's Kate, me, and...
那个死鱼眼的人是黛安 The one with the dead eyes is Diane.
虽然我们都绝对不是处女 Except we're definitely not virgins.
我都懒得开口问 为什么圣母 I am not even gonna ask why the mothers of our lord
竟然在吃空心辣肉卷 were eating Jalapeno popper.
空心辣肉卷 可怕的食物 麦格之前来过 Jalapeno popper! Bad food. Meg was here.
叫那个酒鬼来接电话 Get the lush on the phone.
好吧 Okay.
喂 Hello?
麦格 你知道昨晚发生了什么事吗 Meg, do you know what happened last night?
是你把苦艾酒加进了潘趣酒当中吗 Are you the one who spiked the punch with absinthe?
那是触犯刑法的 而且是你第三次犯了 That is a criminal offense and would be your third strike.
所以你们才表现得那么古怪啊 That's why you guys were acting so weird.
我真不敢相信你们喝苦艾酒不带我 I can't believe you drank the absinthe without me.
我上周留给凯特的 I dropped it off for Kate last week
是为了圣诞节一起喝的 So we could drink it together on Christmas,
但我根本没有开瓶 But I didn't open it.
苦艾酒 好吧 但是 Absinthe? Yeah, but --
好吧 我们会在圣诞节 生日 Okay, we give alcohol to each other for Christmas
以及银行休假日互相送酒 and birthdays and bank holidays and...
别忘了还有每周四 Don't forget Thursdays.
我们喝得有点太多了吧 Wow, we drink too much.
但那不是现在的重点 But that's not the point right now.
是啊 重点是我被一头土狼袭击了 Yeah, the point is I got attacked by a coyote.
什么 你还好吧 What?! Are you okay?
不好 我圣诞节竟然在急诊室里 No! I'm in the E.R. on Christmas!
都是喝醉酒的圣诞老人和流浪汉 It's all... drunk Santas and hobos.
你怎么会被一头土狼袭击呢 How did you get attacked by a coyote?
你让我去参加史上最棒的派对 Well, you said to come over for the best party ever.
有人吗 Hello?
*我看见了那迹象* *I saw the sign,*
*让我大开眼界* *and it opened up my eyes*
*我看见了那迹象* *I saw the si--*
*生活苛求多 理解少* *Life is demanding without understanding*
*我看见了那迹象 让我大开眼界* *I saw the sign, and it opened up my eyes*
天啊 Oh, my god.
*我看见了那迹象* *I saw the sign*
*没人扶你一把* *No one's gonna drag you up*
*或推你进入你所属于的光里* *Or put you in the light where you belong*
*但你到底属于哪里呢* *But where do you belong*
反正不是这里 Not here.
真会扫兴 Way to bring it down.
我们刚刚玩得可开心了 Well, we were having so much fun.
不好意思 我们一起唱歌了吗 I'm sorry. We sang together?
好吧 但那跟土狼有什么关系 Okay, but what does that have to do with the coyote?
-我再问一遍 我们一起唱歌了吗 -是啊 - And I ask again, we sang together?! - Yeah.
然后黛安出去找栗子了 And then Diane went outside to go look for chestnuts.
我不知道栗子是什么 I don't know what a chestnut is,
但我敢肯定它们肯定不会长在车道上 but I'm pretty sure they don't grow on driveways.
我有吗 I did?
我上次那么做还是个小姑娘的时候 I haven't done that since I was a girl.
我们以前常和爸爸一起在火前烤栗子 Oh, we used to roast them in front of the fire with papa.
栗子 Chestnuts.
我会帮你选到最优质的栗子 爸爸 Oh, I'll pick you the finest chestnuts, papa.
它们在火上不断蹦跳 翩翩起舞 And, oh, how they'll jump and they dance on the fire.
你好啊 小家伙 Well, hello there, little thing.
天啊 你乖不乖呀 Oh, my. Aren't you friendly?
你乖不乖呀 Aren't you friendly?
我为孩子们找到了一条狗狗 I found us a dog for the kids.
等等 这条狗是土狼吗 Oh, wait, the dog is a coyote?
我的狗是土狼吗 My dog is a coyote?
我觉得那条狗是一只狼 I think that dog is a wolf.
是啊 它确实很像一只狼 Yeah, it could have been a wolf.
好吧 管它是什么 我觉得我们都同意 Okay, well, whatever it is, I think we can all agree
那是一只野生动物 that it's a wild animal.
快来 快来 小家伙 快出来 Come on. Come on, fella. Outside. Go.
等等 你为什么要赶走我们的狗 Wait, why are you getting rid of our dog?
那条狗是一头土狼 That dog was a coyote.
-是一只狼 -那是我们唯一的礼物 - It was a wolf. - That was our only present.
好了 各位 圣诞节最重要的并不只在于礼物 Okay, well, guys, Christmas isn't only about presents.
你们现在怎么还有心情讨论礼物呢 How can you people even be talking about presents
明明有个疑似死亡的女人躺在你们家浴缸里 when there's a seemingly dead woman in your bathtub?
斯坦伯格老师 Mrs. Steinberg?
沃伦的老师跑来干什么 What's Warren's teacher doing here?
帕蒂 Patty!
我去负责蛋糕售卖 I'll work the bake sale!
我就知道她没死 I knew she wasn't dead.
我也知道 Me, too.
我也知道她没死 I knew she wasn't dead, either,
但我真的想吸引注意力 But I really wanted attention.
你确定不要我帮你拿件浴袍什么的吗 You sure I can't get you a robe or something?
不 不用了 我这样挺好的 Oh, no, no. I'm comfortable like this.
你到这儿来干什么 So, why are you here?
你给我喝了那杯邪恶的酒 Oh, I fell asleep in your tub
我就在你家的浴缸里睡着了 after you fed me that devil juice.
好吧 那你的衣服是怎么回事 Yeah, but what happened to your clothes?
都被皮特脱走了 Oh, Peter took them.
什么 What?
我之前正在和女教友们一起唱颂歌 Well, I was caroling with my all-women's church group.
斯坦伯格老师 请进 跟我们一起喝一杯吧 Mrs. Steinberg? Come in. Have a drink with us.
我觉得她只是让我一个人进去 I-I think she meant just me.
我待会儿去祈祷圈举办地和你们碰面 I'll meet you at the chuns' prayer circle.
凯特 看这个 Kate! Look at this!
天啊 皮特 那真是个好主意 Oh, my god! Pete! That's a great idea!
我知道 我知道 I know. I know.
这是我最近一直在忙的一个案子 It's the case I've been working on.
我们可以为孩子们创造一个冬日奇境 Oh, we can make a winter wonderland for the kids!
-你知道你需要什么吗 -什么 - You know what you need? - What?
一个小精灵 An elf!
等等 这是我自己的主意吗 Wait... this was my idea?!
我看着像小精灵了吗 Do I look like an elf yet?
差不多吧 不过还有点不怎么对称 Almost. They're ju-- they're just a little uneven.
-把你那条稍微弄短一点 -好的 - Make yours a little shorter. - Okay.
不 你弄得太短了 Oh. No, you made it too short.
现在我只能把我的也弄短一些了 Now I have to make mine shorter, too.
好吧 确保你们一定要修好 Okay, make sure you get it right
因为眉毛是灵魂之窗的窗帘 Because the eyebrows are the curtains to the windows of the soul.
好吧 Okay.
真是太美了 They're gorgeous!
我们刚刚创造了完美的圣诞时刻 We just created the perfect Christmas moment!
我们 来拍张照吧 Let's -- let's take a picture.
-不要 -要 - No! - Yes!
快来啊 黛安 玩一下嘛 Come on, Diane, be fun.
-黛安 -好吧 好吧 - Diane. - Okay, okay, okay.
好咧 过来 Okay, here.
我来 我来 稍等 I got it. I got it. Oh, hang on.
麦格 你能照看一下我的小狗狗吗 Meg, can you watch my little puppy, please?
快过来 好的 Come on. Okay.
它看上去有点像土狼呢 You know, he looks a little like a coyote.
它看上去非常像土狼 He looks a lot like a coyote.
- 好了 好了 快挤进来 -好的 - Here we go. Here we go. Squish in. - Okay.
看到没 我觉得我们三个可以当超好的朋友 See? I think the three of us could be great friends.
我真这么觉得 I really do.
为什么还不拍啊 Why isn't it going?
就要拍了 快了 就要拍了 It's -- it's -- it's coming. It's coming.
茄子 茄子 Cheese! Cheese!
着火啦 火 It's on fire! Fire!
天啊 那条狗咬了我 Oh, my god! That dog bit me!
快灭火 快灭火 Get it out! Get it out!
我们完全没料到会发生这种事 We're so unprepared for this!
着火了 Fire!!
凯特 把门打开 Kate, open the door!
好的 打开门 打开门 Okay! Okay! Open the door! Open the door!
赶出去 打开门 Get it out! Open the door!
开门 开门 Open it! Open it! Aah!
衣服化了 手好烫 Suit is melting! Hands are hot!
我还是不明白我怎么会穿上你的圣诞老人装 I still don't understand how I got into your Santa suit.
我们当时正谈论 你是多么厌恶赚这么多钱 We were talking about how you were sick of making so much money.
什么 What?
你为什么想辞职 So, um, why do you want to quit your job?
因为极端唯物主义是圣诞节最糟糕的一点 Because crass materialism is the worst part of Christmas.
你想知道圣诞节最糟糕的一点是什么吗 You want to know the worst part of Christmas?
极端唯物主义 我刚说了 Crass materialism. I just said that.
不 是孩子们不再相信圣诞老人的存在 No, it's when the kids stop believing in Santa.
一年年过去 我眼看着孩子们不再相信 Year after year, I see the kids stop believing
圣诞的魔力 in the magic of Christmas.
童年结束了 小清新面孔的童真 Childhood is over, and fresh-faced innocence
也被黄色重口味取代了 is replaced by more pornography
让人都不敢试探 than you can shake a stick at.
有一天 波特也不会再相信圣诞老人的存在 Someday, Bert's not gonna believe in Santa anymore.
确实如此 That's the truth.
斯坦伯格老师 我现在必须要求您 Mrs. Steinberg, I'm gonna have to ask you
脱下衣服 to take off your clothes.
好戏开始了 Show time.
圣诞老人 Santa?
真的是你吗 Is that really you?!
再见 再见 各位 Bye-bye! Bye. Bye, guys!
再见 斯坦伯格老师 Bye, Mrs. Steinberg!
-再见 黛安 -祝我们大家快乐平安 - Bye, Diane! - L'chaim to us all!
再见 谢谢 Bye-bye! Thank you!
-礼物该怎么办 -是啊 - So, what's the deal with the presents? - Yeah,
我觉得我们因为没做过的事 I mean, it feels like we're being punished
而被惩罚了 for something we didn't do.
拜托 孩子们 圣诞的意义并不只在于礼物啊 Come on, guys. Christmas isn't just about presents.
而是美好的记忆 It's about memories.
但你什么都记不起来啊 But you can't remember anything.
记不起来昨天的事 但今天 About yesterday, but today,
我们有很多美好的记忆啊 We had a lot of great memories.
我们创造了雪 我们和一头 We made snow, we got to hang out
长得十分像土狼的狼一起玩了 wth a very coyote-like wolf.
而且我看到圣诞老人了 And I saw Santa!
是啊 波特还看到了圣诞老人 Yeah, and Bert saw Santa.
所以 我只想说 So, I just want to say...
谢谢你 凯特 让我们团聚在一起 Thank you, Kate, for bringing us all together.
我现在坐在这里 You know, as I sit here,
不禁想到 I can't help but think that...
我们有这么多东西需要清扫 We have so much to clean up.
我觉得挺好的 I think it's nice.
终于有圣诞的感觉了 It finally feels like Christmas.
这是什么气味啊 Hey, what's that smell?
沃伦 Warren.
闻着像希拉里放的屁吧 Smells more like Hillary.
-什么 -闻着像塑料烧焦的气味 - What?! - It smells like burnt plastic.
-怎么回事啊 -是什么味道啊 - What is going on? - What is that smell?
一辆自行车 Oh, a bike!
圣诞老人真的来过 我就知道 Santa was here! I knew it!
是啊 儿子 他是来过 是来过 Yes, he was, son. Yes, he was.
*我们祝您圣诞快乐* *We wish you a merry Christmas *
*我站的真真高* *And it's so high up here
我们终于找到礼物了 Well, we found the presents.
那辆车看着还是可以挽救的 I mean, the bike looks pretty salvageable.
圣诞老人送给我一辆自行车 因为我很乖 Santa brought me a bike because I was a good boy.
我刻苦学习 勤洗澡换衣 I worked hard in school, I showered every day,
我还帮凯特调派对饮料了 And I helped Kate with her party juice.
-等等 什么 -再说一遍 - Wait, what! - Come again*
-什么 -我每天都洗澡 - What? - I showered every day.
基本算是每天吧 Well, almost every day.
不不不 后面一句 No, no, no. The other part.
不是我干的哟 It wasn't me.
-听见了吗 女士们 -不是我干的 - You hear that, ladies? - I didn't do it!
恭喜哦 凯特 Congratulations, Kate.
谢谢你热心的帮忙 波特 And, oh, thank you so much for being so helpful Bert.
是啊 谢谢你 波特 Yes, thank you, Bert.
天啊 Oh, god.
-什么 -道格来电 - What? - It's Doug.
道格 听着 我... Doug! Hey, listen, I --
好的 Yes.
我很乐意圣诞来加班 I would love to come to work on Christmas day.
好啊 Yeah.
我没有辞职 I didn't quit.
-他没有辞职 -我没有辞职 - He didn't quit! - I didn't quit my job!
-他没有辞职 -真是圣诞奇迹 - He didn't quit! - It's a Christmas miracle!
耶 哈利路亚 Yay! Hallelujah!
我要去找那头土狼了 Well, I'm gonna go look for the coyote.
-你们也一起吧 -那是头狼 小心点 - You should come. - Uh, it's a wolf. Be careful.
*我看见了那迹象 让我大开眼界* *I saw the sign, and it opened up my eyes *
*没有你 我照样过得精彩* *And I am happy now living without you *
*我已经离开你* *I've left you, oh-oh-OH!*
*我看见了那迹象 让我大开眼界* *I saw the sign, and it opened up my eyes *
*我看见了那些迹象* *I saw the sign*
*没人扶你一把* *No one's gonna drag you up*
*或推你进入你所属于的光里* *Or put you in the light where you belong*
*我看见了那迹象* *I saw the sign*
*它让我大开眼界 我看见了那迹象* *and it opened up my eyes, I saw the sign*
太棒了 Naild it!