today's video was sponsored by carrots
actually alright if you put other stuff
on us I wouldn't consider my parents
health nuts more like health kernels
they would never buy unhealthy snacks
but they wouldn't force me and my
siblings to go outside and play because
it was always burning hot and we just
licked the melted candy off the sidewalk
anyways they would never buy sugary
cereal the most sugary cereal my parents
got was honey nut cheerios but my mom
would mix the honey nut cheerios with
regular ones to make it more healthy or
something
so I would start every day spending 15
minutes picking out the regular Cheerios
from the cereal bowl that's right my
parents didn't buy a stable Cocoa Puffs
or candy my life sucked we were allowed
to eat sugary cereal for one day out of
the year and that was on Christmas
morning it's a fun tradition and we
still do it to this day as a kid I would
always get jealous when my friends would
pull out their Lunchables and tell me
how much their family ate out and all
the sugary cereals they got to eat
meanwhile I had a PB&J sandwich on wheat
bread with the crust still on but it's
okay cuz I like the crust but now
looking back I'm just so grateful that
my mom cared enough about my health to
instill these healthy eating habits into
me at a young age I mean I don't follow
them anymore because I live on my own
and I don't know how to cook in Bagel
Bites tastes so darn good but I'm still
thankful my mom taught me what I should
be doing now if there's any parents
watching this going hmm I like the way
this James's mom character thinks good I
would recommend to all parents that you
should be teaching your kids healthy
eating habits as soon as possible I
definitely didn't appreciate it at the
time but now that I'm older and wiser
I'm thankful that I like the taste of
wheat bread my parents had a saying the
wider the bread the sooner you're dead
they would always get wheat bread even
for hot dog and hamburger buns they got
wheat some of you might have had to use
sandwich bread as hot dog buns you're
poor I get it but at least you didn't
have to use wheat bread however now that
I live on my own I still get the wheat
bread because I don't want to die young
I still have youtube videos to make some
things never change I guess except I do
get the white hotdog buns the wheat ones
are still gross when I was a very little
kid my dad's work was throwing a
barbecue get-together thing and I got to
eat as many hot dogs on white bread as I
could handle but the best part of it all
was I got to wash it down with soda
listen I was very sugar deprived back
home I had to catch up on all the sugar
I was missing out on I don't remember
what the soda was exactly but let's just
say for the sake of this story it was an
original bottle of coke from the 1800s
it might as well have had cocaine
because I was addicted to all the white
powdery stuff they added in that drink
pretty soon my tummy started to get the
rumblies and I had no idea what was
causing it so I told my dad dad my tummy
hurts
and he said hmm it's probably because
you're dehydrated here have some soda
and I still respected my dad at that age
and thought he knew what he was talking
about so I drank more soda and then I
threw up and my dad said we should leave
I mentioned this next story in my first
book available in bookstores near you be
on the lookout for book number two
coming out at the end of March but one
time my mom bought a giant three pound
bag of Skittles I forgot what she bought
them for but they definitely weren't for
us she locked them away in a closet
because she knew what us kids would do
if we got our grubby little hands on the
skittles this wasn't the first time my
mom had to hide candy from us but this
time she forgot to lock the closet
leaving the skittles unprotected and me
and my older brother ate the entire
thing and we would have gotten away with
it but then something came up
puke I threw up on the family room
carpet my mom saw how rainbow the
throw-up was and immediately put two and
two together and knew that we had gotten
into her skittles the funny part of this
story is that my older brother got
punished but I didn't because according
to my mom I had already suffered enough
and that's why that story is in the
chapter titled perks of being the
younger brother anyways don't eat so
much candy that you throw up okay I'm
gonna be talking about M&Ms for a while
so to make it go faster instead of
saying M&Ms I'm just gonna say mmm and
one of my older videos I said that my
favorite candy bar was mmm-hmm and every
time I would tell people that they would
always say that's not a candy bar I just
I just can't do this anymore
but then something interesting happened
a year after that video was posted mmm
actually released a bar version of their
candy so now I can absolutely say that
mom is my favorite candy bar and not get
any weird looks
someone at the marketing team sent me a
box of candy bars and I think they
wanted me to promote it but because I
said that moons are my favorite candy
bar whenever I go to a convention
sometimes you guys bring me
mmm candy which is very thoughtful but
you know I like other things too like
Oreos and Twix and money you know I'm
just saying you don't have to bring me
all the time when I was visiting London
I went to the store with my friends Adam
and Mads and if you don't know about the
London store it's four stories tall
35,000 square feet and according to
Wikipedia the largest sweet store in the
world
so it was kind of big once I stepped
inside my first thought was okay this is
too much
it was like the candy forest scene in
Willy Wonka except it was all chocolate
and expensive in one part of the store
you could make your own custom moons
with a picture in two phrases so for the
picture I googled my cartoon self held
up my phone to the camera and it bloody
worked bite and for the phrases
naturally we wanted to write something
that was meaningful so we wrote mad
stinks and Adam smells but the employee
didn't allow us to write that because it
was too negative and went against the
brand so knowing we were not allowed to
roast each other the next phrases we
decided to print was get Mads and
something else whitey it wasn't creative
but without being able to make fun of
each other we didn't have a lot to work
with
but those phrases weren't allowed either
because they were the names of some
youtubers so they got flagged by the
system and they told us you'll need
permission from the youtuber even though
you're both right here listen boys I'm
just an employee I don't want to get
sued on one hand I'm glad that has a
system in place to prevent people from
stealing but on the other hand it's just
hands what do you think we're gonna do
with them so after two failed attempts
at getting the phrase we wanted we
settled on getting and Mads at least I
still got my cannonball guy printed even
though technically this image is
copyrighted so mmm you'll be hearing
from my lawyers soon one of the
disadvantages of being a youtuber is the
lack of benefits we don't even have
dental and with all the junk food I'm
eating and the flossing I'm not doing I
should probably see one can I confess
something I didn't know dentists who are
optional I thought they summoned you to
their offices like jury duty that's what
it felt like when I was a kid I've never
gotten a cavity though at least not one
that I know of so at least I'm doing
something right
now comes the part of the video where I
give you advice on eating healthy but
I'm still working on that myself and
when I don't know what to eat I can't
help but biting down on a delicious
carrot carrots are the most popular
vegetable in the world having been
nominated as the best orange thing ever
use code odd one next time you purchase
a carrot to get five thousand free
carrot points and a bunch of weird looks
at the grocery store give your body the
fuel it needs you wouldn't pour soda in
a car engine and expect it to run of
course that's not really the best
metaphor to use because you also
wouldn't pour water into a car and
expect it to run I guess everyone drink
gasoline because cars and people are the
same but the point is you've only got
one body so you should take care of it
hey guys hope you enjoyed the first
video of 2020 did any of you eat sugary
cereals as a kid cool me neither
I want to get sappy for a second and
thank everyone for supporting me it's
crazy how far we've come in like how
long has it been six years many of you
have noticed some odd ones out merch
popping up at Hot Topic gamestop box
lunch and Target and all of this has
happened because of your support and it
really means the world to me I want to
give a big shout out to my amazing team
who worked on this video all of their
socials are in the description I
wouldn't have been able to finish this
video without you I'll see you cheeky
blokes at VidCon London in February and
maybe I'll try some jammie Dodgers while
I'm there and one last sugary sweet
message before I go next time you go to
the store buy some junk food remember to
wear your seat belt