■
m 20 0 l 209 0 b 218 0 229 11 229 20 l 229 209 b 229 218 218 228 209 228 l 20 228 b 11 228 0 218 0 209 l 0 20 b 0 11 11 0 20 0
m 115 64 l 115 35 l 171 0 l 177 0 l 133 46 l 143 52 l 179 0 l 184 0 l 159 63 l 229 107 l 229 182 l 145 96 l 135 122 l 207 227 l 137 227 l 115 172 l 115 93 l 126 76 l 115 64 l 104 76 l 115 93 l 115 172 l 93 227 l 23 227 l 95 122 l 84 96 l 0 182 l 0 107 l 70 63 l 45 0 l 50 0 l 87 52 l 97 46 l 52 0 l 59 0 l 115 35
m 71 60 b 71 0 161 0 161 60 b 161 120 71 120 71 60
m 325 0 l 355 0 l 332 47 l 354 47 l 399 136 l 369 136 l 328 53 l 288 136 l 257 136 l 325 0 m 467 0 l 497 0 l 474 47 l 496 47 l 541 136 l 511 136 l 470 53 l 430 136 l 399 136 l 467 0 m 545 1 l 583 1 l 583 14 l 568 14 l 568 19 l 583 19 l 583 30 l 568 30 l 568 34 l 599 34 l 599 30 l 583 30 l 583 19 l 599 19 l 599 14 l 583 14 l 583 1 l 611 1 b 616 1 622 6 622 10 l 622 36 l 652 0 l 678 0 l 644 41 l 622 41 l 622 47 l 596 47 l 597 54 l 625 54 l 625 68 l 541 68 l 541 54 l 572 54 l 571 47 l 545 47 l 545 1 m 583 72 l 583 85 l 569 85 l 569 90 l 598 90 l 598 85 l 583 85 l 583 72 l 611 72 b 615 72 621 78 621 82 l 653 44 l 678 44 l 644 86 l 621 86 l 621 103 l 597 103 l 597 136 l 570 136 l 564 126 l 562 136 l 542 136 l 548 107 l 568 107 l 565 121 l 571 121 l 571 103 l 547 103 l 547 72 l 583 72 m 600 107 l 620 107 l 624 124 l 653 89 l 679 89 l 642 136 l 615 136 l 618 132 l 606 132 l 600 107 m 689 0 l 716 0 l 721 15 l 732 15 l 732 30 l 718 56 l 731 56 l 735 100 l 721 100 l 717 59 l 714 64 l 714 136 l 693 136 l 693 79 l 676 79 l 707 30 l 679 30 l 679 15 l 694 15 l 689 0 m 738 0 l 804 0 b 807 0 813 6 813 9 l 813 87 l 794 87 l 794 14 l 756 14 l 756 87 l 763 77 l 763 21 l 787 21 l 787 91 l 798 91 l 798 120 l 820 120 l 812 136 l 778 136 l 778 90 l 748 136 l 723 136 l 756 87 l 738 87 l 738 0 m 257 151 l 275 151 l 297 182 l 319 151 l 337 151 l 304 197 l 304 227 l 290 227 l 290 197 l 257 151 m 337 151 l 355 151 l 377 182 l 399 151 l 417 151 l 384 197 l 384 227 l 370 227 l 370 197 l 337 151 m 425 192 l 447 192 b 445 181 427 181 425 192 l 410 192 b 414 162 458 162 462 192 l 462 206 l 425 206 b 425 210 429 212 433 213 l 462 213 l 462 227 l 433 227 b 412 227 408 203 410 192 m 462 151 l 532 151 l 532 165 l 504 165 l 504 227 l 489 227 l 489 165 l 462 165 l 462 151 m 580 172 l 580 186 l 549 186 b 543 186 543 192 549 192 l 565 192 b 589 192 589 227 565 227 l 532 227 l 532 213 l 565 213 b 570 213 570 206 565 206 l 549 206 b 524 206 524 172 549 172 l 580 172 m 592 213 l 606 213 l 606 227 l 592 227 l 592 213 m 639 172 l 665 172 l 665 186 l 639 186 b 623 186 623 213 639 213 l 665 213 l 665 227 l 639 227 b 603 227 603 172 639 172 m 700 184 b 722 184 722 215 700 215 l 700 229 b 740 229 740 170 700 170 b 660 170 660 229 700 229 l 700 215 b 680 215 680 184 700 184 m 737 172 l 782 172 b 803 172 813 177 813 198 l 813 228 l 799 228 l 799 198 b 799 186 793 187 782 187 l 782 228 l 768 228 l 768 187 l 752 187 l 752 228 l 737 228 l 737 172
本字幕由人人影視字幕組翻譯 禁止用作任何商業盈利行為
翻譯：瑣事煩心賽太公 腦力枯竭YY貓 醉芝士
校對：瑣事煩心賽太公 腦力枯竭YY貓總監 YY貓
後期：孤帆 時間軸：YY貓
生活大爆炸 第七季 第十集
《生活大爆炸》前情提要 Previously on The Big Bang Theory
謝爾敦 你這是想出了一個辦法 Sheldon, did you just figure out a method
可以人工合成一種新型穩定超重元素嗎 for synthesizing a new stable super-heavy element?
是嗎 Did I?
這不可能呀 Well, that can't be right.
從來沒有人成功過呢 No one's ever done that before.
除了我 我想出來了 Except me, because I just did it!
謝爾敦謝爾敦腦力無邊 Sheldon and his brain-- yeah!
謝爾敦謝爾敦腦震八方 Sheldon and his brain-- yeah!
我犯了個可怕的錯誤 I've made a horrible mistake.
你在說什麼 What are you talking about?
這個表格是平方釐米制的 This table-- it's in square centimeters.
我看成了平方米 I read it as square meters.
知道這意味著什麼嗎 You know what that means?
美國人看不懂公制嗎 That Americans can't handle the metric system?
艾米 我這是失之毫釐差之千里的錯誤 Amy, I was off by a factor of 10,000.
但是中國研究小組發現了元素 But the Chinese team found the element.
他們不應該發現的 Yeah, well, they shouldn't have.
我的計算是錯的 My calculations were wrong.
我這輩子最偉大的科學成就 the greatest scientific achievement of my life
是建立在一個巨大的錯誤之上 is based on a blunder.
我不是天才 I'm not a genius,
我是個騙子 I'm a fraud.
謝爾敦 在神經系統學裡 You know, Sheldon, in neuroscience,
我們總是在大腦某處有所發現 we're forever finding something in one part of the brain
但地方和原來想的完全不一樣 that we thought was someplace else.
這下可好 我連騙子都不如了 Oh, great, now I'm worse than a fraud.
我淪為生物學家之流了 I'm practically a biologist.
時至今日
歡迎收聽《科學星期五》 我是艾拉•菲萊 This is Science Friday. I'm Ira Flatow.
今日的來賓是第一個 My guest today is responsible for the discovery
穩定超重元素的發現者 of the first stable super-heavy element.
歡迎謝爾敦•庫伯博士 Welcome, Dr. Sheldon Cooper.
謝謝 Thank you.
是學校硬要我來的 Uh, the university made me come here.
我本人並不想來 I didn't want to.
我是這節目的忠實觀眾哦 Uh, big fan of the show.
我聽說你之所以發現這元素 So, I understand that you actually discovered
完全是因為一個錯誤 this element by mistake.
是的 Yes.
而科學界有些人把這個錯誤稱之為 And some people in the science community are calling it
-"蠢貨奇跡" -那些人是誰 - "The Wonder Blunder." - Who?
告訴我他們的名字 Give me their names.
肯定是沃羅威茨 I bet it's Wolowitz.
這故事真是太了不起了 It's just such a fascinating story.
你在計算上偏差了這麼多 Your calculations are way off,
卻還是有人找到了這元素 but they find the element anyway.
感覺就像是讀錯藏寶地圖 It's like misreading a treasure map
卻還是找到了寶藏一樣 and still finding the treasure.
我們能聊別的話題嗎 Can we talk about something else?
你知道我會唱山歌嗎 Do you know that I yodel?
那不錯啊 但這發現有可能 That's interesting, but this could be taking you
讓你獲得諾貝爾獎 down the path toward a Nobel Prize.
而且是化學獎哦 And in chemistry, no less.
這種情況很少見吧 And wouldn't that be unusual?
因為你是物理學家 Because you're a physicist.
對對對 我將是獲得諾貝爾化學獎的物理學家 Yes, yes, I'd be a physicist with a Nobel in chemistry.
大家快來笑我這個奇葩吧 Everyone laugh at the circus freak.
我不需要坐在這忍受你的羞辱 菲萊 You know, I don't need to sit here and take this, Flatow.
就是因為有你這種惡霸 It is because of bullies like you,
所以每天才會有越來越多的 every day more and more Americans
美國人轉投看電視 are making the switch to television.
塞伯特校長 你為什麼要凶我 President Seibert, I don't know why you're yelling.
是你叫我去上廣播節目的 You're the one who made me go on the radio.
我以為那會是一場專業的科學訪談 I was expecting a professional science interview,
而不是被整人節目口無遮攔的主持人攻擊 not an attack by some morning zoo shock jock.
如果學校這麼缺錢 Well, if the university needs money so badly,
或許你該設立個髒話罰款筒賺錢 perhaps you should start a swear jar.
你這一串髒話夠罰一塊錢啊 That one's worth a dollar.
我知道你不喜歡上節目 I know you don't like it,
但是你每次去接受採訪 but every time you do an interview,
都能提大學提高知名度 it raises the profile of the university.
高知名度就有高資助費 That translates to funding.
我又不是受訓的賣藝猴子 Yeah, well, I'm not just some trained monkey
幫他們乞討錢 dancing for coins.
你當然不是啦 Of course you're not.
那種猴子多討人喜歡 People love trained monkeys.
你有什麼好不開心的啊 How can you not be happy?
你又高又瘦又出名 You're tall, thin and famous.
天啊 我好嫉妒謝爾敦 Oh, my God, I'm jealous of Sheldon.
這些訪談估計還持續一段時間 Look, you're gonna be doing this stuff for a while.
你得找到習慣這些事的方法 You're just gonna have to find a way to get used to it.
但你們沒人能懂我的心情 But none of you know what this is like.
自己悔恨不已的事卻被人大肆讚揚 Being celebrated for something you wish you never did.
想必你沒跟我一起去過狂歡節 Mmm... you clearly haven't been with me at Mardi Gras.
要暫停一下遊戲來幫忙我打掃嗎 Want to pause the video game and help me clean up?
我正在打掃啊 I am cleaning up.
打掃小丑對高譚市造成的破壞 Look at the mess the Joker made of Gotham City.
拜託 要來暫住的可是你的朋友 Come on, it's your friend who's coming to stay here.
拉傑是在印度長大的 Raj grew up in India.
相信我 比這更髒的他都見過 Trust me, he's seen worse.
華仔 Howie.
我保證這周接下來的日子我會幫忙 I promise I'll help out the rest of the week.
這周接下來的日子 The rest of the week?
你不是說就一兩天嗎 You said it was just gonna be a night or two.
但如果我直接跟你說住一周 Yeah, but if I told you a week,
-你會同意嗎 -當然不會 - would you have said yes? - No!
所以我只好出此下策啦 Then you left me no choice.
我喜歡拉傑 但他這暫住也太久了吧 I love Raj, but that's a long time for a house guest.
但他的公寓整個樓都在除蟲 沒法住 I know, but they're tenting his building.
他也找不到能讓帶寵物的酒店 He can't find a hotel he likes that allows dogs.
他還帶小桂子來啊 He's bringing Cinnamon?
待一整周呢 For a whole week!
有些人真是大驚小怪 The nerve of some people.
迎面而來的是羞愧號快車 Here comes the Embarrassment Express.
將會經過 騙子鎮站 With stops at Fraudville...
蠢貨奇跡山站 WonderBlunderberg...
以及坎薩斯城 and Kansas City.
只因這是運輸交匯處 Because it's a hub.
謝爾敦 我能進來吧 Sheldon, can I come in?
-你有帶餅乾嗎 -沒有 - Do you have cookies? - No.
很好 我不配吃餅乾 進來吧 Good. I don't deserve cookies. Come in.
-威爾... -謝爾敦 - Wil...? - Hey, Sheldon.
好久不見 It's been a while.
你怎麼來了 Why are you here?
艾米說你最近不開心 Amy said you were having a rough time,
我就想來開導開導你 and I thought maybe we could talk.
可以嗎 Is that okay?
當然可以 Certainly.
雖然... Although...
現在我就不開心 right now, I'm having a rough time
因為我房間現在有三個人 because there's three people in my room,
感覺跟迪斯可舞廳一樣擁擠 and it's starting to feel like a discotheque.
謝爾敦 你說你不開心是因為 Sheldon, you said you were unhappy getting attention
人們都在關注讓你悔恨不已的事 for something you wished you never did.
關於這事 我也有點經驗 Yeah, I know a little something about that.
少來了 威爾 Oh, nonsense, Wil.
你的刷屏微博也沒那麼糟啦 Your endless tweets are not that bad.
我想起這麼久不見他的原因了 I remember why it's been a while.
謝爾敦 我要說的是 Sheldon, I was actually talking
我小時候在星際迷航裡演出的事 about when I was a kid on Star Trek.
你怎麼會不喜歡因為出演該電影 How could you not like getting attention
而獲得大家的關注呢 for playing Wesley Crusher?
你的角色很討喜啊 You were wonderful.
一個全知全能記憶超強的男孩 A know-it-all boy genius with an eidetic memory.
誰對那個角色會沒有代入感啊 Who couldn't relate to that?
不是每個人都這麼想的 Well, not everybody felt that way.
很多人很討厭那個角色 A lot of people really hated the character,
因此有些人也為此而討厭我 and some of them hated me because of it.
我也曾接受過訪談 I would do interviews,
很多人都會嘲諷我 and people would be mean to me.
我也碰到這種事了 That just happened to me.
下次你想不出刷什麼屏了 Next time you're stuck for a tweet,
歡迎你寫一條艾拉•菲萊是混蛋的微博 feel free to say what a jerk Ira Flatow is.
謝爾敦 重點的是威爾能學會接受現實 Sheldon, the point is Wil learned to embrace that part of his life
然後更重要的東西邁進 and moved on to bigger and better things.
是啊 我現在是個作家 Yeah, I'm an author now,
經常公開演講 I do public speaking,
我自己還出了一部關於桌遊的網路劇 and I have my own web series about board games.
我們是要哄他開心 所以... We're trying to cheer him up, so...
我只是想告訴你 曾有一段時間 I'm just saying that there was a time when I thought
我以為自己走不出那角色的陰影 I would never get out of Wesley Crusher's shadow.
但現在 But now,
那只是我完美人生中的一小章節 it's just one small part of a pretty great life,
我也很開心有過那些經歷 and it's a part that I'm happy is there.
我明白你的意思 I do see what you're saying.
挺受用的 That helps.
那就好 Good.
你們倆個要留下來一起玩火車嗎 Would you two like to stay and play trains with me?
-好 -可以啊 - Sure. - Okay.
太好了 Oh, great!
現在呢 Now...
我來操作控制器 I work the controls.
我來喊"請上車" I say "All aboard",
你們倆安靜坐著看就行了 you sit quietly and watch.
我能吹哨子嗎 Can I blow the whistle?
你還是走吧 You should probably go.
你要在我家沙發上刷牙嗎 You're gonna brush your teeth on my couch?
我是要刷小桂子的牙 No, I'm gonna brush Cinnamon's teeth.
何苦呢 Why bother?
她有一半的時間都是在舔屁眼 She spends half the time licking her butt.
另一半的時間是在舔我臉 And the other half licking my face.
所以我才要幫她刷牙 That's why I'm brushing her teeth.
抱歉 我回來晚了 Hey, guys. Sorry I'm so late.
你們吃完飯了嗎 Did you already have dinner?
沒 我們在等你 No, we were waiting for you.
你們真好 Aw, that's so sweet.
所以你今晚打算煮什麼呢 Yeah. So what do you feel like making?
霍華德 這可憐的姑娘剛忙完回家 Howard, the poor thing just got home from work.
我先給你倒杯酒 Let me get you a glass of wine.
然後我來做晚餐 I'll cook dinner.
-拉傑 你可是客人 -沒關係啦 - Oh, Raj, you're our guest. - Don't be silly.
快坐下 你看上去很累 Sit. You look like you've had a long day.
沒事啦 她經常這樣 No, she always looks like that.
因為她嫁了個傻逼 Because she married an idiot.
謝謝 拉傑 Thank you, Raj.
客氣啥 就當是我感謝你們 Please, this is my way of thanking you
讓我住在這裡吧 for letting me stay here.
跟我們說說你今天過得怎麼樣 Now, tell us all about your day.
好的 首先我開會遲到了 Okay, um, well, first, I was late to a meeting
因為在路上堵車了 'cause I was stuck in traffic.
我就叫你在手機裝一個交通即時監控軟體嘛 Well, I keep telling you to put that traffic app on your phone.
你今天回家抱怨 因為吃太多糖豆 Hey, when you got home today complaining that you felt sick
而肚子不舒服時 from eating too many jelly beans,
我有教你怎麼解決問題嗎 did I tell you how to fix it?
沒有 No.
相反 我說"小可憐 一定很疼吧" I said, "Aw, that must hurt,"
然後幫你揉肚肚 and I rubbed your belly.
我全程都在想著你 I thought of you the whole time.
我的意思是 有時你只需去傾聽 All I'm saying is there's a time to just listen.
多謝 Thank you.
有時你也得適可而止 別吃那麼多糖豆 There's also a time to stop eating too many jelly beans.
"有時"是指十歲以後 And it's when you're ten.
塞伯特校長 Hello, President Siebert.
謝謝您接聽我的電話 Thank you for taking my call.
我只是想讓您知道 您現在可以指望我 I just wanted you to know that you can now expect
熱心參與有關我的發現的一切活動了 enthusiastic participation from me regarding my discovery.
不 不 不 Oh, no, no, no, no.
無需感謝我 No need to thank me.
要謝就謝我的朋友 威爾•惠頓 Thank my friend, Wil Wheaton.
向您報告一下 我有九個朋友 For your information, I have nine friends, hmm?
算上您的話 就十個 Ten if we include you.
那就九個吧 Nine it is.
還是十個吧 算上沃羅威茨好了 Ah, it's ten. I'll count Wolowitz.
你好 朋友萊納德 Hello, friend Leonard.
你心情不錯嘛 Hey, you're in a good mood.
我心情超棒的 I'm in a great mood.
那你的心情即將變得更棒 Well, you're about to be in an even better one.
我是現在確定了才敢告訴你 I didn't want to say anything until I knew for sure,
但 but...
我在我實驗室重新測試了你的元素 I've been re-running the tests on your element in my lab
我證明了它不存在 and I disproved it.
你的元素根本不存在 Your element does not exist!
是嗎 但中國的研究小組呢 Yeah, but what about the Chinese research team?
他們的確發現了啊 They found it.
結果證明是有人在 Yeah, it turns out someone added
資料檔案裡加入了類比信號 simulated signals to the data files.
他們偽造了結果 They faked the results.
-真的嗎 -真的 - Really? - Yes!
你知道這意味著什麼嗎 Do you know what that means?
你討厭的所有關注 通通都會消失 That means all of this attention that you hate goes away.
所以不會再有訪問嗎 So no more interviews?
對 全都結束了 No, it's all over.
真是難以置信 I can't believe it.
不用客氣 Well, you're welcome.
你奪走了我這輩子最大的成就 You robbed me of my greatest achievement!
什麼 What?!
我現在只有九個朋友了 I'm back down to nine friends!
算了 八個吧 我也不喜歡沃羅威茨 Make it eight-- I'm sick of Wolowitz, too!
我不明白了 I-I don't understand.
自從你發現這個該死的元素後 All you've done since you discovered
你就一直在抱怨個不停 this stupid element was complain.
我只是想讓你開心 I was trying to make you happy!
所以要奪走我唯一成名的機會嗎 By taking away my only claim to fame?
如果你想讓我開心 Well, if you wanted to make me happy,
你可以跟我講個笑話 you could have told me a joke.
或是給我看一段有愛的視頻 Or shown me a cute video
比如考拉和水獺 of a koala and an otter
破天荒地成為朋友 becoming unlikely friends.
你總是最有理那個 Oh, there is no winning with you.
而且考拉和水獺居住地差了十萬八千里 And koalas and otters don't even live near each other!
所以它們成為朋友才是破天荒之舉 That's what makes their friendship unlikely!
你們倆在吵什麼啊 What's with all the yelling?
萊納德推翻了我的發現 Leonard disproved my element.
現在所有的關注都要消失了 Now all the attention is going to go away.
這很好啊 你一定很激動吧 Oh, that's great. You must be thrilled!
很好 我現在只剩七個朋友了 That's it! I'm down to seven friends.
他是連霍比特人和超級英雄都算上了吧 He's counting hobbits and superheroes, right?
一開始我以為元素是真實存在的 我不想要它 When I thought the element was real, I didn't want it.
但現在萊納德證實它並不存在 But now that Leonard made it not exist,
它反而成了我全世界最想要的東西了 I want it more than anything in the world.
那元素從來就不存在 The-the element never existed.
不是我奪走它 而是科學奪走了它 I didn't take it away, science took it away.
要氣就氣科學吧 Be mad at science.
你膽敢用科學來反駁我 Don't you dare use science against me.
科學可是我最好的朋友 Science is my best friend!
太好了 我又有八個朋友了 Oh, good, I'm back up to eight.
你能告訴他 他瘋了嗎 Will you tell him he's out of his mind.
老實說 我理解他的意思 Actually, I get what he's saying.
太棒了 變九個了 Oh, yes! Nine!
歡迎回來 朋友 Welcome back, buddy.
就像跟一個你不是很喜歡的人約會 It's like if you're dating someone you're not that into,
等那人跟你分手了 and then they break up with you
你就變得很想要那人了 and then you want them more than ever.
我完全不知道她在說什麼 I have no idea what she's talking about.
但我們現在聯手對付你 所以我贊成她的話 but we're ganged up on you so I agree.
謝爾敦 那你要我怎麼樣 Okay, Sheldon, what do you want me to do,
隱瞞我的發現嗎 hide the information?
如果我不公佈 If I don't publish it,
遲早其他人也會這麼做的 it's just a matter of time before someone else does.
不 你當然得公佈 No, no, of course you have to publish.
那是你作為一個科學家應盡的責任 That's your responsibility as a scientist.
否則會違背職業道德 Doing otherwise would be unethical.
你別無選擇 You have no choice.
好吧 我會公佈 Fine, I'll publish.
你看這沒良心的混球 Can you believe this guy?
拉傑把碗都洗了 Aw! Raj did the dishes.
你怎麼知道不是我洗的 How do you know I didn't do them?
因為有一次 所有刀子都沒洗 Because once, when all the knives were dirty,
你寧願用鑰匙切面包圈 也懶得洗 you cut a bagel with your keys.
早上好 兩位 Good morning, everybody.
我出去的時候 順便買了咖啡 I picked up coffee while I was out.
伯納黛特 這是你的大豆薄荷摩卡 Bernadette, here's your soy peppermint mocha.
你真是太客氣了 Aw, you didn't have to do that.
樂意之至 Oh, my pleasure,
對了 不要擔心今天的演講 and don't worry about your presentation today.
你一定會表現出色 You're gonna be great.
對啊 你一定能震驚四座 Yeah, you're gonna knock it out of the park.
我今天要做什麼演講來著 What presentation do I have today?
快走吧 Just go.
他很愛你的 He loves you.
你這是幹什麼 What are you doing?
你是故意讓我難堪嗎 Are you trying to make me look bad?
我只是想當個好客人 I'm just being a good house guest.
不 你是想當一個比我還好的丈夫 No, you're being a better husband than I am.
洗碗 買咖啡 Doing the dishes, getting coffee,
對她的生活瞭若指掌 knowing about her life--
誰會那樣做啊 who does that?
別這樣嘛 我也給你買了一杯 Oh, come on, I brought you one, too.
我不想喝咖啡 I don't want coffee.
所以我給你買了熱巧克力 That's why I got you hot chocolate.
快給我 Give me that.
不許什麼都做得比我好 Just stop showing me up.
霍華德 聽我說 Howard, listen to me.
你是一個很棒的丈夫 You're a great husband.
沒錯 你傾聽的技巧還需要多練練 Yes, your listening skills could use some work.
但作為一個獨生子 But it's amazing how far you've come
還有一個過度保護的老媽 given that you're an only child
你算做得很不錯啦 raised by an over-protective mom.
這情形好像有點奇怪啊 Um, is this getting weird?
別動 Hang on.
的確是很怪 So, yes.
我想告訴你一聲 我發表了我的發現 I just wanted to let you know that I-I posted my findings.
我看見了 I saw.
我剛發公告 要求撤回我的論文 And I just posted a retraction of my paper.
現在整個科學界都知道我是錯的 Now the whole scientific community knows I was wrong.
這樣的事情經常發生 謝爾敦 These things happen all the time, Sheldon.
不是發生在我身上 Not to me.
我之前唯一一次公告的撤回說明 The only other retraction I ever had to issue
還是在我7歲的時候 我承認我哥哥 was when I was seven and I conceded that my brother
是東德州最優秀的忍者 was the greatest ninja in East Texas.
但那只是把我的臉 But that was just a ploy
從他的臭腋窩裡拯救出來的權宜之計 to get my face out of his armpit.
他在這裡啊 There he is!
我最愛的超級英雄 It's my favorite superhero--
撤回俠 the Retractor!
拜託 別落井下石了 Come on, don't give him a hard time.
對不起 庫珀 I'm sorry, Cooper.
我撤回剛才說的話 I retract it.
順便說下 霍夫斯塔德 By the way, Hofstadter,
做得真棒 推翻了中國研究組的結果 nice job disproving the Chinese team.
不算什麼 It's not a big deal.
這可是大事 It's a huge deal.
庫珀 也許你不太適合研究物理 Cooper, maybe physics just isn't your thing.
有沒有考慮轉去做零售 Have you ever considered a career in retail?
這樣你就能靠撤回東西過生活了 That way you could take things back for a living.
好了 巴里 太過了 Okay, Barry, that's enough.
不 沒事 Oh, no, that's okay.
我可以打贏自己的戰鬥 I can fight my own battles.
對嗎 "八尼" Isn't that right, "Bawwy."
你這是 Is...?
在嘲笑我的語言障礙嗎 Is that a reference to my speech impediment?
太傷人了 That's pretty hurtful.
我 I...
我自己沒法控制 I can't control it.
你說得對 You're right,
這招太卑鄙了 That was uncalled for.
我收回 I take it back.
你當然要收回了 Of course you do.
因為你是鼎鼎大名的撤回俠 Because you're the Retractor!
拉傑 晚餐的味道太好了 Raj, this dinner was amazing.
如果你多住一段時間 If you're here much longer,
我得買大一號的衣服了 I'm gonna have to buy bigger clothes.
瞎說 Nonsense.
你需要長點肉 You need a little fattening up.
你最近太瘦了 You've been looking too skinny lately.
華仔 你怎麼從來不會說這些哄人開心的話 Howie, how come you never say anything sweet like that?
說什麼呢 What are you talking about?
記得上周 我問你 Remember last week, when I asked you
你是否穿了塑身衣 你卻沒穿嗎 if you were wearing Spanx and you weren't?
這明明就是誇你苗條嘛 How's that different?
也許你可以學學你的朋友拉傑 Maybe you could try being more thoughtful,
更體貼一些 like your friend Raj.
也許你可以學學拉傑 Yeah, well, maybe you could try being more like Raj.
-是嗎 -當然 - Oh, really? - Yeah, yeah.
他今天早上為我打包了午餐 He packed me a lunch this morning.
袋子裡有張字條寫著 "勇敢上吧" And there was a note inside that said, "Go get 'em"
我為這個家做得還不夠多嗎 Like I don't do enough around here.
現在還要為你打包午餐嗎 Now I need to pack your lunch?
而且 你為什麼需要字條來告訴你 And by the way, why do you need a note telling you
"勇敢上吧" 你是個大老爺們 to "Go get 'em"? You're a grown man!
你應該知道要"勇敢上吧" You should know to "Go get 'em"!
我的確知道"勇敢上吧" I do know to "Go get 'em"
只是有時候 我"勇敢"去"上"的同時 but sometimes it's nice to have emotional support
有精神支持感覺會更好 when I'm going and getting them!
別這樣 瞧你們在說些什麼話 Hey, hey, do you hear yourselves?
咱們冷靜下 都各退一步 Let's just, you know, all calm down and take a step back.
太傻了 我們為什麼要吵架 This is stupid. Why are we fighting?
我不知道 I don't know.
我想是因為我覺得自己是個差勁的老公 I guess I was just feeling like I'm a lousy husband.
你不是差勁的老公 You're not a lousy husband.
你是個非常棒的老公 You're a great husband.
我才覺得自己是個差勁的老婆 I was the one feeling like a lousy wife.
開什麼玩笑 你最棒了 Are you kidding? You're the best.
我知道問題在哪裡 I know what the problem is.
都怪他 It's him!
我做了什麼 Oh, what did I do?
你讓我們覺得 我們經營婚姻不夠用心 You made us feel like we're not trying hard enough.
我們之前很滿意我們打混摸魚的婚姻 Yeah, we were totally fine half-assing our marriage
直到你這個禍害出現 till you showed up.
我很抱歉讓你們生氣了 Look, I'm sorry you're upset with me,
但我得說 看到你們統一戰線 but I just have to say it's nice to see
真是太好了 the two of you on the same page.
你能支持我一次 Oh, it does feel good to have you
的確感覺不錯 backing me up for once.
-我總是支持你好吧 -那不是... － I back you up all the time! - That is not...
-他又在挖坑 -你這人太壞了 - He's doing it again! - What is wrong with you?!
真不敢相信他們把你趕出來了 I can't believe they kicked you out.
真不敢相信他們還沒離婚 I can't believe they're still married.
不好 我把小桂子的牙刷忘在霍華德家了 Oh, no, I forgot Cinnamon's toothbrush at Howard's.
看來你又要和爸比共用一把牙刷啦 I guess you're sharing with Daddy again.
要我打電話給反虐待動物協會就吠一聲 Bark once if you need me to call PETA.
那只動物在咱們家幹嘛 What's that animal doing in our apartment?
放輕鬆 她在籠子裡 出不來的 Oh, relax, she's in her crate. She can't get out.
送你幾個字送給你 I have two words for you:
侏羅紀公園[恐龍逃出] Jurassic Park.
今天真是越來越糟糕 This day just keeps getting worse and worse.
如果這話能讓你感覺好點... You know, if it makes you feel any better...
可能不會 It probably won't.
你可能是對的 You're probably right.
謝爾敦 今晚夜色不錯 Sheldon, it's a beautiful night.
我們出去散步好嗎 Why don't you and I go for a nice walk together?
你這人怎麼整天淫蟲上腦啊 Oh, everything is just sex with you isn't it?
謝爾敦 你得意識到 Sheldon, I think you might find the support
想在戀愛中得到多少扶持 you're looking for, if you realize that
全取決於自己有多少付出 relationships are a give and take.
你有多支持她 She can only be there for you
她也會有多支持你 as much as you are for her.
謝謝你 拉傑什 Thank you, Rajesh.
艾米 你對待謝爾敦也要有耐心 And, Amy, you need to be patient with Sheldon,
而不是對他施壓 instead of pressuring him
讓他接受你的這一套親密觀 to accept intimacy on your terms.
你還是走人吧 You should probably go.
我是艾拉•菲萊 這裡是《科學星期五》節目 I'm Ira Flatow, and this is Science Friday.
歡迎謝爾敦•庫珀博士再次前來 I'd like to welcome back Dr. Sheldon Cooper,
他以為自己發現了一種新的超重元素 who thought he had discovered a new super-heavy element
不料卻被另一位嘉賓萊納德•霍夫斯塔德 only to have it disproved by my next guest,
證明是錯的 Dr. Leonard Hofstadter.
先生們 歡迎來到《科學星期五》做客 Welcome to Science Friday, gentlemen.
-謝謝 -謝謝你 - Thanks. - Thank you.
艾拉 容我說一句 我想為 Ira, if I may, I'd like to apologize
我上周的行為道歉 for my behavior last week.
沒關係 It's all right.
你有沒有什麼話想對我說 Now, isn't there something you'd like to say to me?
沒有 No.
霍夫斯塔德博士 Now, Dr. Hofstadter.
你能講述一遍你推翻 Can you walk us through the process
他理論的實驗過程嗎 you used to disprove his theory?
-好的 -我可以回答這個問題 - Well... - I believe I can answer that.
他問的是我 He asked me.
好的 Fine.
我剛才在說 As I was saying...
你講得不好 艾拉 You're telling it wrong. Ira...
要想好好理解這件事 to really understand the story here,
就得從最開始講起 you have to start at the very beginning:
在東德州的一個小鎮 一位年幼的天才叫做 A small town in East Texas, where a young genius named...
-謝爾敦 -沒錯 謝爾敦•庫珀 - Sheldon... - That's right, Sheldon Cooper.
他被鄰居家的狗咬了 He was bitten by his neighbor's dog,
這讓他有了第一次科學方面的大突破 leading to his first scientific breakthrough--
狗狗死亡射線 the doggie death-ray.
可悲的是 他不能使之成為現實 Which, sadly, he couldn't build
因為聖誕老人沒有送他濃縮鈾 because Santa wouldn't bring him enriched uranium.
你沒意見的話 我真的很想聽 I mean, I'd really like to hear it from Dr. Hofstadter,
霍夫斯塔德博士說說 if it's okay with you.
好意外啊 What a surprise.
你邀請我回來 就是為了無視我嗎 Did-did you invite me back just so you could ignore me?
事實上 我根本沒有邀請你 Actually, I didn't invite you.
你走進來 自己坐下 You came in, you took a seat,
我不太喜歡這種唇槍舌劍 and I'm not comfortable with confrontation.
謝爾敦 這次採訪的重點是我 Sheldon, this interview is supposed to be about me.
聽起來多無趣啊 Well, that seems like a snooze.
在無聊的電臺上都顯得無聊 Even for public radio.
如果他們每說一句丟人的話 You know, if we did a shot every time
我們就幹一杯 they said something embarrassing,
那這遊戲絕對能把人喝到酒精中毒 this would be one hell of a drinking game.
現在喝酒太早了吧 A little early for alcohol, isn't it?
我可不僅只會發表科學方面的高明見解 You know, I don't just say smart things about science.
我還會唱山歌 I also yodel.
我去拿伏特加 I'll get the vodka.