Take Me Out to the Ball Game
WOLVES - WORLD'S CHAMPIONS
Hold it, boys. Steady.
- That's it. All right for you, Pete? - Sure.
Change clothes and get back to work.
- Make it snappy. - Mike, what have you got for us?
We have the same line up as last year. Taylor behind the bat, Gordon on third.
Goldberg! Douse that heater!
We have that old double play combination: O'Brien to Ryan to Goldberg.
Maybe.
You've got Goldberg, but I'm told O'Brien and Ryan ain't showing up this year.
Don't make me laugh.
Tell your readers that they're on their way here this minute.
They've been working out all winter and they're in the pink.
Okay. Thanks, fellas.
Did you hear from them?
I've sent them 10 telegrams, and they ain't answered one.
Here's one they'll answer. Where are they?
They're in Pottstown, Illinois.
Pottstown, Illinois?
Get a pencil and paper. Write this down.
"O'Brien and Ryan, Pottstown, Illinois.
"Who do you guys think you are?" Stop.
"Get your fannies on the first train to Florida or I'll throw you out of baseball!"
Wait a minute, make a change there.
Just say...
..."Please, fellas, we need you."
IN PERSON - O'BRIEN & RYAN
Shortstop and 2nd Baseman CHAMPION WOLVES
"Nelly Kelly loved baseball games
"Knew the players, knew all their names
"You could see her there every day Shout 'Hurray! '
"When they'd play
"Her boyfriend by the name of Joe
"Said, 'To Coney Isle, dear, we'll go'
"Then Nelly started to fret and pout
"And to him I heard her shout
"'Take me out to the ball game
"'Take me out with the crowd
"'Buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack
"'I don't care if I never get back
"'Let me root, root, root for the home team
"'lf they don't win it's a shame
"'Cause it's one, two, three strikes you're out
"'At the old ball game!"'
- You wanna chase them all home? - Yeah, we wanna.
Why don't you stop stealing bows?
Why don't you mind your own business?
- You bonehead. I got a notion to... - To what?
Denny, cut it out, will you?
You big lug!
Now wait a minute, Eddie.
Wake up, kid. We're in a hurry.
- What happened? - Nothing.
This happens all the time.
Every once in a while he gets illusions. He thinks he has muscles.
Are you pulling out?
Yeah. We've got to catch a train. We're joining the ball club in Florida.
Goodbye, baby doll.
- See you next season - 'Bye.
Lucky punch, that's what it was.
How many times have I told you to pick on somebody your size?
There ain't nobody my size!
I could have knocked the big lug for a loop.
- But I didn't want to hurt my hands. - Sure.
You don't want me to show up at training with a busted hand, do you?
You save these pictures, don't you?
For the kids at the park, yeah.
That's me.
I'd sooner have my picture in front of a theatre.
You and your show business.
It's gonna be great to get back in that old ball game again.
I can hear the umps now.
"Batteries for today...
"...Rube Waddell and R. C. Schrick."
- Kind of chokes you up, doesn't it? - Yeah, it chokes me.
When I think of all the dames I lost because I had to be in bed by 10:00.
Play a lot of checkers by 10:00.
No, sir, brother. Give me vaudeville anytime.
And maybe a musical show. 50 girls.
Maybe even 100 girls. Oh, boy!
I suppose it would be more fun than playing checkers.
You suppose?
You know, Denny...
...you're getting old enough to find out.
To tell you the truth, Ed...
...lately, I have been thinking a lot about romance and about girls.
No!
Yeah.
- They smiled at us. Let's go talk to them. - We don't even know them.
But I feel like talking. I'm a very sociable fellow.
Let's go talk to those fellows over there.
It ain't the same.
SARASOTA BASEBALL PARK
- Drop our stuff at the hotel, will you? - Yes, Mr. O'Brien.
Look who's here! How are you? How you doing, kids?
Win a pennant again this season?
- How's the throwing arm? - You got any pictures?
- There's the guy with pictures. - Got thousands of them. There you are.
What a sight.
You got to admit, it's a great thrill.
Who's knocking it?
Kind of warm feeling comes over you, doesn't it?
It happens to me every spring.
PLAYERS ENTRANCE
Ryan! How are you?
- Good to see you. O'Brien! - How you doing, Slappy?
Goldberg!
Eddie! Dennis! How are you?
How you been?
What about your vaudeville tour?
It was great. We worked every town in the USA.
But we didn't work hard. We had time for play.
The art shows, the birdwalks, the museums were nice.
Tell them about the girls! The quail! The mice!
The mice!
Yeah, the girls.
"I kissed a gal in old Wyoming
"She rode a horse in a Wild West show
"When I said, 'Baby, I'm bent on roaming'
"She cried, 'We just got started' and she sighed, 'We can't be parted'
"But I left her broken-hearted at the rodeo
"Oh, yes, indeed
"Yes, indeedy
"Yes, indeed
"The boy said, 'No'
"Yes, indeed
"Yes, indeedy
"I left her broken-hearted at the rodeo
"I kissed a gal way out in Boise
"That's Idaho where potatoes grow
"I went away and her sobs were noisy
"I said, 'I'll see you later' and I hopped the nearest freighter
"Left her holding a potato down in Idaho
"Yes, indeed
"Yes, indeedy
"Yes, indeed The boy said, 'No'
"Yes, indeed
"Yes, indeedy
"She's left with her potatoes down in Idaho
"I kissed a gal in old Poughkeepsie
"That's where the College of Vassar's found
"She couldn't study, love made her tipsy
"Her teachers wouldn't pass her so she just turned on the gas
"And now the sweetest gal at Vassar's in the cold, cold ground
"Yes, indeed
"Yes, indeedy
"Yes, indeed The boy's a hound
"The sweetest gal at Vassar's in the cold, cold ground
"I met a gal when we hit Manhattan
"A scrumptious babe dressed in silk and lace
"Her eyes were stars and her skin were satin
"I told her how I'd missed her then she murmured that and this
"So I thought I'd try to kiss her, but she slapped my face!
"Yes, indeed
"Yes, indeedy
"Yes, indeed Couldn't reach first base
"Yes, indeed
"Yes, indeedy
"I thought I'd try to kiss her, but she slapped my face!
"I kissed a gal down in Mississippi
"A Southern belle name of Emmy Joe"
That was her name?
"I thought for once love had got me dippy
"She called me 'Lucky Seven'
"Said my kisses were from heaven
"Then I learned she was 11 And I had to go
"Yes, indeedy
"Her age was just 11 So he had to go
"Yes, indeed
"Yes, indeedy
"Yes, indeed The boys made hay
"Yes, indeed
"Yes, indeedy
"We're hot as electric wires Twice as hot as forest fires
"And the biggest pair of liars!"
Liars?
What the hay?
"We're the biggest pair of liars in the USA"
Gilhuly!
- How are you? - Hiya, Mike. How are you?
What's ailing him?
I've got some bad news for you.
This just came.
"From the law office of Hergesheimer, Hergesheimer, Hergesheimer, Herge..."
Never mind the batting order.
"Gentlemen...
"...this will inform you that according to the will of Colonel J. B. Newhouse...
"...former owner of the baseball club known as the Wolves...
"...all rights and interests in said club...
"...have been bequeathed to the late Colonel's young and distant relative...
"...one K. C. Higgins...
"...who will arrive in Florida on the 10th instant to assert ownership...
"...and actively participate in the management of said club."
- Who's K. C. Higgins? - He'll probably want to pitch.
We got to take orders from a dopey kid who never swung a bat?
- Looks that way. - Not to me!
I don't know about you, but I want us to win the pennant.
You don't cop any prize money finishing in last place.
This happened to Baltimore once. They had to dig them out of the cellar.
- Lf this guy opens his trap, I quit! - So do I!
Wait a minute. Quiet.
Wait a minute now.
How about a little fair play here, boys?
You guys don't even know this Higgins.
Now here's what I say.
He's gonna arrive here Sunday morning. Until then, let's keep an open mind.
Above all, let's not judge him too hastily.
The little rat!
You take the back end.
Are you Mr. Higgins?
K. C. Higgins?
- Higgins? - No.
Good.
- Are either of you Higgins? - No.
- I'm so sorry. - That's all right.
I never did have any sense of direction, Miss...
- K. C., Miss Higgins. - Thank you.
You're welcome.
Florida Palms Hotel, please.
K. C. Higgins!
He's a girl!
Miss?
Are you looking for someone?
Yes, I am. Michael Gilhuly, he's the manager of the Wolves.
Could you point him out to me?
Lt'd be an awful long point. He's down at the railroad station.
He went to meet the 12:10.
That's the train I came in on. I must have missed him.
I wonder how he missed you.
Mike ought to be along very soon.
Where are your manners? Give the lady your seat.
- I'm sorry, ma'am. - Won't you sit down?
One of our very nicest chairs.
Go read your funny papers, kid.
Mike's in a nasty temper this morning.
Boy, is he mad!
What seems to be the trouble?
He's gone to get the new owner of the club.
Is that bad?
Bad?
On the trip down, you didn't run into a little fathead named Higgins, did you?
A little fathead?
Some, lamebrain from Providence, Rhode Island.
Excuse me, but I'd better...
You better wait until Mike cools off. Now, look, baby doll...
Just put yourself in my hands.
Fast worker, that boy. Just met her, and he's rounding third.
It's a sad situation, miss. Picture this.
Here we are, the greatest team in baseball, the champs...
...and this little fathead from Providence will come here and teach us the game.
- How do you like that? - It's very depressing.
Don't ever be a ball player.
I'll try and avoid it.
Let's talk about you. What are you doing tonight after dinner?
I hadn't made any...
- After dinner? - Yeah, how about stepping out a little?
Just the two of us?
Aren't you ball players supposed to be in training?
Who, me?
- I don't believe in it. - You don't say!
What time do you usually get in?
We're supposed to be in by 10:00.
It's all right for the others, but I usually get in about midnight.
Except, of course, when I have an extra special date.
Then I get in about 2:00 or 3:00.
Tonight I could stay up until 5:00.
Really?
Won't Mr. Gilhuly get mad?
What I always say is, what the boss doesn't know won't hurt me.
You get it, sister?
I get it, brother.
Here he is.
I'd like you to meet a friend of mine, Miss...
Higgins. K. C. Higgins.
- I'm afraid I missed you at the station. - I'm sorry.
That's all right. We've had a very interesting chat...
...Mr. O'Brien and I.
Haven't we?
We sure have, Miss Higgins.
Just call me "Fathead."
Take it easy, now, Eddie.
Papa!
What's bothering you, Ed? You swing like a rusty gate.
- He's lost his batting eye. - Yeah.
Mr. O'Brien, you're stepping in the bucket.
How's that?
I said, "You're stepping in the bucket."
Thank you.
Maybe you'd like show me how to do it.
If you don't mind.
I'd like to.
Slappy, would you get me the water bucket, please?
May I?
You see, here's what's happening.
Instead of stepping into the ball, like this...
...you're stepping over here...
...and into the bucket.
Let me get this straight.
When I stand at the plate, I'm like this.
No, I hold it a little higher. Up here. You see?
And while waiting for the pitch, I wiggle a little bit.
Like this.
Just to get myself set.
Yes, I've noticed that.
Now, as the ball comes over...
...try stepping into it as you bring the bat back like...
I'm so sorry, Mr. O'Brien.
Would you try it, please?
Pitch to him, would you, Joe? But easy on that arm.
Yeah, easy on the arm.
Okay.
What a poke!
That's four bases in any ball park!
That's the idea, Eddie, but don't try to kill them all.
You know Charlie Davis of Cincinnati only hit 279 but he batted in 102 runs.
Why don't you get Charlie Davis?
Cut the cracks, Eddie!
Mr. Gilhuly, I seem to have taken over your job.
Not at all, Miss Higgins.
Please forgive me. I'll see you back at the hotel.
Let's get busy! Get around there.
Come on, Dennis.
Look out!
Ain't that something?
She's the kind of girl I've always dreamed about.
Wouldn't it be wonderful to be married to a girl who played baseball?
I remember this time last season, we were playing Scranton.
Great town!
Anyway there's a dame named Maxine that's kind of sweet on me.
A very refined, artistic little chick with plenty on the ball.
- A kootch dancer from the circus. - That's what I mean.
Goldberg, give me the bread.
Anyway, this minx is really warm for me.
One night, she's walking me home after the show...
...when all of a sudden I hear a flute playing a kootch dance.
You know like this.
- Good evening, boys. - Good evening.
- Evening, Miss Higgins. - Hello, Denny.
Sit down.
What do you think it is, a formal affair?
Is she gonna eat with us, too?
Hey, watch your language, fellows, and your table manners, too.
She called me Denny.
This may not be such a good idea. You're kind of cramping their style.
They're not used to eating with skirts.
I mean, ladies.
The sooner they get used to seeing me around, the better it will be for all of us.
Yes, ma'am.
Would someone be so kind as to pass me the bread, please?
- Yes, indeed. - With pleasure.
Thank you very much.
Mind your manners!
What's the matter? I had my pinky out, didn't I?
Temper, Mr. Zalinka. Temper.
Have you boys seen the fashion page in this week's Vanity Fair?
There's the cutest pair of pants with a peg top and a narrow bottom...
...if you'll pardon the expression, and the sweetest pair of...
Look. We're plastered all over the paper.
Pretty nice.
O'Brien To Ryan To Goldberg
What does it say?
- Shall we tell them? - Shall we?
By all means.
"O'Brien
- "To Ryan - "To Goldberg
"What a great double play!
"The other team never can get to score
- "In every inning - "We keep them from winning
"Each time that they try for a rally
"That's when we save the day
"Someone's on first and the game is in doubt
"The guy up at bat hits a terrible clout
"The dust clears away and they're both of them out
- "O'Brien - "To Ryan
"To Goldberg
- "O'Brien - "To Ryan
"To Goldberg
"Packs them into the park
"The crowds in the bleachers Are there at dawn
"They treat us royal Gee-whiz, but they're loyal
"One game lasted 17 innings
"It was way after dark
"We couldn't see a darn thing anymore
"We thought the crowd had gone home good and sore
"Then out of the back came a deafening roar!
"O'Brien to Ryan to Goldberg!
"Who is the guy who scoops up the ball
"And whips it to second base?
"O'Brien
"And who is the guy who stands on the pill
"To first at an awful pace?
"Ryan
"And who is the guy who tags them at first
"With a pitying look on his face?
"Mrs. Goldberg's baby boy
"Goldberg, Goldberg That's the word for us
"My mother always wanted me to play the violin
"That dainty little instrument just didn't fit my chin
"The night of my recital
"I played Ich Liebe Dich
"When suddenly a voice rang out:
"'Throw that cat a fish! '
"And then a ripe tomato was hurled in rude attack
"I swung my fiddle wildly and batted it right back
"That moment started off my new career
"And now the sweetest music do I hear is
"O'Brien to Ryan to Goldberg
"What they all come to see
"Shortstop to second and then to first
"Just one, two, tree, the unholy trio
"The way that we move on the diamond
"It is sheer poetry
"Winning the games from the spring to the fall
"It's just all for one and it's just one for all
"The Three Musketeers of the bat and the ball
"O'Brien
"To Ryan
"To Goldberg"
- How about a game of checkers? - Checkers? That's for firemen.
For ballplayers too, if you know what's good for you.
I know what's good for me.
Don't lock the door. I'll be in around 2:00.
What's the fine for breaking training?
$25. Why?
Let's make it $50, shall we?
The little dears do need their rest, you know.
How much money have you got?
Well, in round figures, exactly 38 cents.
And you?
Checkers.
I didn't say nothing.
- That's a quarter you owe me. - This could go on all season.
- What's eating him, anyway? - The call of the wild, junior.
Something's got to be done. Something's got to be done.
Take a look.
Beautiful, isn't she?
Not bad for a dame who can field a hot grounder.
"'... The crowd
"'Buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack
"'I don't care if I never get back
"'Let me root, root, root for the home team
"'lf they don't win it's a shame
"'Cause it's one, two, three strikes you're out
"'At the old ball game
"'One, two, three strikes You're out
"'At the old ball game"'
Boys, I've got it.
This is what we do. First, we...
Fellas...
...come here.
Come here!
There's one way we can break training without getting into a jam.
Take her out on a date. We'll get two other girls and we'll go stepping.
I've got a hunch that girl is human.
Yes, and guess who she's crazy about? You.
Me? Personally? You think so?
Sure. Denny, this is it. If she's a dame, she wants romance.
And she's a dame. Denny, here's your chance.
A touch of her hand, a subtle caress...
...a few tender little nothings whispered in the moonlight...
Denny, it's up to you.
But I don't know any tender little nothings.
It's been my experience, the athletic type like Higgins...
...might go for the caveman approach, like this.
Come here.
Handle her rough, Denny.
Rough?
No.
What do you want me to do?
First, go out on that balcony. Let her see you.
Then let nature take its course.
Be nonchalant.
But I don't know about nonchalant and things like that.
Sit on the rail, look up at the moon.
Look up at the moon!
Never mind the moon.
Never mind the moon!
Make up your mind.
Attract her attention.
Cough!
Softly, you dope.
Hello, Denny.
Hello, Miss Higgins.
Katherine's the name.
Hello, Katherine.
What do I do next?
What did you say, Denny?
I said, what do I do...
- Talk to her! - Say something!
- Go down and talk to her. - How can I get down?
- Get down the tree! - The tree?
Go down the tree. Go on. Don't stop now!
- Hello, Miss Higgins. - Katherine.
Katherine.
- It's a lovely night, ain't it? - Yes, it is, Denny.
And that's a great big moon, ain't it?
Yes, it certainly is. It's a lovely moon.
How's that?
I said, "It's a lovely moon."
Just stopped to think that...
...a lovely night like this and a great big moon, and a girl like...
The right girl, Denny.
Sure.
How would you be able to tell, Denny?
I could tell.
Right away?
Right from the very first time.
"I'll hear heavenly music
"I'll hear bells start to chime
"I'll hear thunder
"And I'll be struck with wonder
"But I won't have to look
"A second time
"If her voice is a song
"And her walk is a dance
"And if her laugh
"Is warm and free
"If I suddenly seem
"To be seeing a dream
"She's the right girl for me
"If the glow in her eyes
"And the light in her smile
"Could charm a bird
"Right off a tree
"I'll be charmed as a bird
"And I'll know in a word
"She's the right girl for me
"She'll have a simple, sweet appeal
"That wins my affection
"She'll be the kind who'll make me feel
"She needs my protection
"If the sight of her face
"And the touch of her hand
"Can make me happy as can be
"If my heart says, 'Come in
"'Darling, where have you been? '
"She's the right girl...
"...for me"
That was beautiful, Denny. Beautiful!
Miss Higgins, you're wonderful!
The way you picked up that grounder was just wonderful.
The kid's all right.
Yes. It's gonna be a gay social season.
There's some little red books in my drawer. Get me Volume 3.
Volume 3.
One, three.
Give me that.
We'll get two other girls. We'll be a party of six till we get to town.
Then it's every man for himself.
Let's see now: Alice, Stella. How about Stella?
- Nothing. - Nothing? Let me see.
Jesse Davis, I think she owned a horse and buggy.
I don't think we'll go out tonight.
What do you mean?
There's the bag.
Hit it hard.
- You're out. - Got me.
See if you can get it.
I'll go to second. I got it.
Out.
- Wonderful. - That's fun, Denny, but...
...it is getting late. I think I'd better be going.
- Goodnight. - Goodnight.
Of all the stupid...
He's probably coming back for his baseball bat.
What a spot for a pinch hitter.
Pinch hitter? No, not me. I'm poison to her.
We've got to get out of here. The social season. The little red book.
Remember?
- That a boy! - Okay.
She's wonderful! She's beautiful! Did you see her figure?
Did we see her figure?
Wait a minute. What are you gonna do?
Take it up where you left off.
A fine pal he turned out to be!
Come on. Quit worrying! He's just gonna fix it up for you.
He is? Really?
"If I suddenly seem
"To be seeing a dream
"She's the right girl for me"
Who is it?
It's me. O'Brien.
May I come up?
I hope you'll pardon me, Miss Higgins, but I...
There's something on my mind and I...
Yes?
I'd like to apologize...
...for everything that's happened.
I've been behaving like an idiot, haven't I?
Yes, you have.
I just wanted you to know I was sorry.
Fine. Was there anything else?
- What? - 'Cause it's getting kind of late.
Miss Higgins, don't go in yet.
Why not?
- Don't spoil it! - Spoil what?
The whole picture.
The moonlight on the ocean...
...and the garden and the night...
...and you on a balcony.
Mr. O'Brien, you're very poetic for a shortstop.
Call me Edward.
Edward.
By the way, what'll I call you? Miss K. C. Higgins?
No.
What does the "K" stand for?
Katherine.
That's nice.
What does the "C" stand for?
Catherine.
Two Katherines.
They couldn't decide which way to spell it, so they named you twice.
That's right.
- You sure they're talking about me? - Positive. They're laughing, aren't they?
Look, Katherine, Catherine, we're wasting time.
Why don't we go for a stroll on the beach in the moonlight?
- But don't you think it's a little late? - No.
Well, I do.
How about tomorrow night?
Perhaps. But you'd better go now.
Okay.
The stairs, please.
Goodnight.
Goodnight and sweet dreams, baby doll.
Kissing her hand! The dirty double-crossing rat!
Calm down, will you? He's just kissing her for you.
Then what? I suppose she'll kiss him and he'll come back and kiss me?
I know I won't like it!
Edward.
Yes?
You broke training tonight just to speak to me.
You risked a fine.
I'd risk my life.
You would?
Then I'm sure you won't mind.
Mind what?
It's going to cost you $50...
...baby doll.
Goodnight.
- He's only trying to help you. - Looks like he's helping himself!
Wise guy, ain't you? Trying to beat my time?
Forget it, will you?
You climbed the wrong balcony this time, buddy.
- Go away. - Put up your dukes!
He walked right into it!
Hey, what's all this noise about? You guys should be in bed!
- What's the matter with him? - Nothing.
They were showing me their new vaudeville act.
Yeah, the new vaudeville act.
"Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou, Romeo?
"Deny thy father and refuse thy name.
"If thou wilt not be, but sworn my love
"And I'll no longer be a Capu..."
Go to bed, Goldberg! And you, too, Juliet!
WOLVES START HEAVY PRE-SEASON TRAINING
WOLVES HEAD FOR HOME WILL MEET SENATORS IN OPENER
TEDDY ROOSEVELT TO ATTEND OPENER
All right, boys, that's it. Come on.
What's going on out there, Mike?
The boys like to do a little clowning. They do it before every game.
The fans eat it up.
It looks like the Senators to me, at the right odds.
- Three to two? - I'll take $2,000 worth.
You've got it.
- Who's that skinny little runt? - Denny Ryan, the second baseman.
He's cute.
And so active for a little fellow.
Denny!
Hiya. Pleased to meet you.
My name's Shirley.
Didn't you like it?
I don't like to mix clowning with baseball.
Maybe I ought to give up baseball and stick to clowning.
Mr. President, would you mind posing with this "big stick"?
Delighted.
Get a nice one in there now.
- Come on back. Come on back. - Safe!
All right.
Send him around now, boys.
Strike!
- Would you like my opinion? - Play ball.
Strike!
What's the matter? You blind?
Keep your eyes open! Watch them, you robber!
Cut it out, O'Brien!
- Cut what out? - Riding the umpire.
Miss Higgins says you're antagonizing him.
So what? He's an umpire, ain't he?
I guess she's afraid we'll hurt his feelings.
Safe! That's the old boy.
- He looks like the winning run. - He's a long way from home.
- Strike! - What? Why?
Lay off the umpire!
So sorry. I almost lost my temper, sir.
You'll pardon the suggestion, sir, but I have a cousin in the optical trade.
He can get you the finest pair of spectacles wholesale, bifocals, too.
Play ball!
Give that big mouth of yours a rest!
I beg your pardon, but I was not addressing you, stupid.
Ball!
Thank you, sir. Even you could see that.
You're out!
- I was safe for a mile! - And I say you're out!
I say you're a liar! He never even tagged me.
Of all decisions, that's the worst I've ever seen! You blind robber!
- You going to take that? - You don't belong here.
Umpires always know best!
You've been calling them wrong all day, you big burglar, you!
That's a very libelous remark.
I won't listen to that! Get off the field!
- You can't put me off! - Yes, you can, can't you?
- Get off. And you are fined $50. - I'm not going to pay it, you crook!
- You thief! You robber! - Don't start anything.
- You burglar! - Make it $100!
- And you keep out of this! - Me? What did I say?
Play ball!
Certainly, sir.
Ball!
- What! - Shut up, or I'll put you off the field, too!
That was right over the plate.
I couldn't even reach that with the big stick.
You could use it to match that big head of yours!
What'd you say?
You heard me. Your ears don't lap over.
Your nose don't either, but I could arrange it.
Play ball!
Ryan, come back!
Wait. What do you want, to start something, Buddy?
Sure.
Cut it out! Break it up! Play ball!
He's hurt. They'll trample him.
You're out!
Give him air.
There's $3,000.
- Better luck next time. - The season's just started.
Look who's here.
Easy now. There.
- The poor kid. He's out cold. - I'll make him come around.
I didn't know you was stuck on the guy.
Who's stuck on him? I ain't stuck on him.
It's just the mother instinct.
That's what it is, the mother instinct.
Hey, you. Come here.
He's a nice-looking little fellow.
Bring him over to the cafй sometime if he ever wakes up.
He's waking up now.
Mr. Ryan.
What happened? Are you all right?
Who are you, anyway?
- She owns him. - What?
She owns me, too.
Can you do that?
What happened to me?
Who are you?
She wants to be your mother.
She wants to be my...
I'll have to take it up with my father.
PLAYERS LOCKER ROOM
TO BLEACHERS
"It's time you made your mind up not to stall with me
"Start playing ball with me
"Your future isn't changeable or shapeable
"It's inescapable
"If you should run to China or to Turkey or Sweden
"Or Herzegovina or Mars
"It wouldn't matter where you'd be
"A force would pull you back to me
"It's written in the stars
"It's fate, baby, it's fate
"And it's knocking at our door
"It's fate, baby, and that's the reason
"You're mine and I am yours
"Don't wait, baby, don't wait
"lt'll happen anyhow
"Don't wait, baby, to do next season
"What you can do right now
"There's a plan for every woman and every man
"Each was made for the other
"Don't treat me like a brother
"Too late, baby, too late
"So accept your destiny
"It's fate, baby, that you were meant
"To fall in love with me
"I've gone and studied up on my astrology I'm really knowledgey
"It doesn't matter if you are Aquarius
"Or Sagittarius
"Or Gemini or Scorpio or Taurus the Bull
"Capricornus or Pisces the Fish
"Winter, summer, spring or fall as long as you were born at all
"Mister, you're my dish
"It's fate, baby, it's fate
"Can't I even put up a fuss?
"It's fate, baby, the stars have written
"That you and me is us
"It's right, baby, so right
"I can see it in the cards
"Don't fight, baby, take off that mitten
"'Cause you and me is pards
"Listen, Mac, it's all arranged in the Zodiac
"Got you coming and going
"Hey, bud, you're future's showing
"Too late, baby, too late
"This feeling in me stirs
"It's fate, baby, so let's start buying
"Towels marked 'His' and 'Hers"'
WOLVES START RO AD TRIP
WOLVES SWEEP SERIES FROM THE ATHLETICS
WOLVES MAKE IT EIGHT STRAIGHT
Wolves Head League By Seven Games
LEAGUE LEADING WOLVES ARRIVE HOME TODAY
I want to talk to you.
No, I'm sorry. I'm very busy now. Why don't she leave me alone?
I got to see you, just for a minute.
I can't now. I'm busy.
Denny, why don't you talk to the lady?
She ain't a lady.
She's been sending me candy and flowers, she's been writing and phoning me.
What does she want from me?
You can't drive a horse up on the sidewalk!
Are you crazy?
Come here!
Why are you running away? What's wrong with you?
She just wants to mother you.
With a whip in her hand? Are you crazy?
You bad boy, I got a notion to take you on my knee.
- You mean over your knee, don't you? - I know what I mean!
What do you want with me?
I got an invitation for you, the whole team.
You, too, I guess.
An invitation to what?
Joe Lorgan's throwing a party Saturday night after the game...
...down at Gibby's Wharf, and he wants the whole team to come.
I don't know...
Are you afraid the boys might enjoy themselves?
You'll love it, there'll be beer and food and music and dancing...
...and clams!
A clambake!
Look away!
"Look away! Look away!
"It's a lovely day today in the USA
"Like a great big strawberry shortcake
"Or a turkey on Thanksgiving Day
"Like the Fourth of July or apple pie
"It's strictly USA
"Like a hot dog covered with mustard
"Or an amateur home talent play
"Like a circus parade or lemonade
"It's strictly USA
"Go to a picnic
"Go to a clambake
"Go to a barn dance
"Or county fair
"You'll see the happy residents
"Raising kids to be the future presidents
"Take a man like Abraham Lincoln
"Take a state like loway
"Take a sugar-cured ham
"A candied yam
"Or take your favorite Uncle Sam
"And shout a big 'hooray'
"It's strictly USA
"You never can know a country till you know the folks
"See 'em in their native locales
"If you want to see young acorns growing into oaks
"You got to see the fellas and gals
"And as the sweetest, extra special bunch of merchandise
"The all-American gal wins the prize
"The all-American man is a hunk of a man
"He's a handy man in a pinch
"And maybe he can't make love like a Latin can
"Still he's quite a guy in a clinch
"The all-American fellow wears the coat of high finance
"But the all-American girl wears the pants
"Like the bell on the little red schoolhouse
"Or a vote on election day
"Like a brass spittoon or Daniel Boone
"It's strictly USA
- "Back East it's 'Hey, bud' - "Down South it's 'Hi, y'all'
- "Cowboys say 'Howdy' - "Injuns say 'How'
"No matter where you're meeting folks
"It's the real American way of greeting folks
"Take a gal like Lydia Pinkham
"Take an oyster from Chesapeake Bay
"Take our ice cream cones
"Or Casey Jones
"Take Mister Tambo and Mister Bones
"They're really here to stay
"'Cause it's strictly USA!"
We're entertaining a bunch of ball players. I don't get it
These boys are a cinch to win. You bet a big chunk of dough against them.
I like the odds. They're 4-to-1.
But they're unbeatable.
So was One Round Delgan until he was knocked cold.
- That fight was fixed. You yourself... - You don't say!
You sure need fattening up.
I don't need anything.
Bones.
She don't feed you enough, that one.
- What one? - The one that owns you.
She doesn't own me, and she feeds me plenty.
Then she ought to change your formula.
Is she your girl?
Yes. No. I mean, I don't know.
If I was your girl, you'd know.
Some people just never appreciate.
Appreciate what?
Just appreciate.
You know, come to think of it, she's really not your type of girl at all.
Will you do me a favor, and don't think about it?
She's wonderful.
Sometimes a person thinks a person is his type of person.
Suddenly, he meets another person who turns out to be really his type of person.
Do you know what I mean?
No. And I don't believe you.
Besides, when the right one comes along, I'll know.
I'll wait.
Say, what's with you and Denny, or am I too personal?
Yes, you are. Much too.
I have a reason for wanting to know.
A personal reason.
You've been keeping me awake nights.
I have?
You have. Indirectly, of course.
Denny talks about you in his sleep.
Keeps waking me up.
Last night, for instance. All of a sudden he woke up yelling...
..."slide, Katherine, slide."
Denny even dreams baseball.
He wasn't dreaming about baseball.
How do you know?
Because when I leaned over to wake him up, he embraced me...
...like this...
...and then he kissed me, like this.
You're right.
It couldn't have been about baseball.
That's what I said.
Okay, Eddie, okay.
Boy, I got to hand it to you. You win.
Win what, Nat?
Nothing, Miss Higgins.
Come on, Nat. What is it, tell me?
Something personal between us.
I bet him $1 that I'd kiss you before the dance was over.
You know something, Eddie? Sometimes I don't get you.
Sometimes I don't get myself.
- Why'd you tell her? - I didn't intend to.
Then why did you?
Because she's got Denny crazy about her and she doesn't care that much about him.
How do you know?
From the way she kissed me.
You're kind of mixed up, ain't you, fellow?
Kind of.
- At last. - At last what, Denny?
You know, Katherine. You must know.
No, Denny, please.
Honest, from the minute you picked up that grounder and threw to third...
...I knew it was love. - No.
It, it's just that I don't want you to build up any false hopes.
I like you very much but, well...
You mean, maybe when the season's over? After we win the pennant?
- We'll talk about it then. - Good.
Will you do me a favor?
Sure.
Will you kiss me? Right now. Hard.
Kiss you now?
- Here? Now? - Right here.
No kick in it?
No. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry.
Sure, it's all right. I understand.
Sometimes a person thinks a person is her type of person...
...and all of a sudden, she finds that...
...that person's really not her type, but another one is her type of person.
It doesn't always work that way, Denny.
It doesn't always work?
- What are you doing spying on me? - Who's spying? I was just watching.
Some people just never appreciate.
Come here, you.
Well, come here.
Kiss me.
Did it have any kick in it?
Good.
I was beginning to worry a little bit.
Hello, Shirley.
Hi.
Dennis, you shouldn't have kissed me in front of all these people.
What's wrong with Mrs. O'Brien's boy, Eddie?
Heart trouble. It looks like heart trouble to me.
What Irish lad could sit while the fiddlers are fiddling...
...the pipes are piping, the women are smiling like it's a wedding.
You should be leaping in the air, knocking your heels, doing a handsome clog.
Come on, get with us!
Go to it, Michael, my boy.
The Gilhulys were the greatest dancers in all Ireland.
This is what sent me over Cockney the night of the Big Wind.
Now you can see why the O'Briens were the first kings of Ireland.
- Good little hoofer, that O'Brien. - Not a bad shortstop, either.
That infield wouldn't be much good without him.
- Where did you get that hat? - Where did you get that hat?
Where did you get that hat?
"'Where did you get that hat? ' Folks ask me every day
"'lsn't it a nifty one? ' You often hear them say
"Put it on, it's funny Can't you see the people smile
"It keeps me busy telling them
"The history of this tile
"It's the hat my dear old father wore
"Upon St. Patrick's Day
"Now talk about respect With his head erect
"As he marched down old Broadway
"'Sure not a man in line Looked half as fine'
"My dear old mother used to say
"'As your father did In his old-time lid
"'Upon St. Patrick's Day'
"It's the hat my dear old father wore
"Upon St. Patrick's Day
"Talk about respect With his head erect
"As he marched down old Broadway
"'Sure not a man in line Looked half as fine'
"My dear old mother used to say
"'As your father did In his old-time lid
"'Upon St. Patrick's Day
"'lt's the hat your dear old father wore
"'Upon St. Patrick's Day'
"Talk about respect With his head erect
"As he marched down old Broadway
"'Not a man in line Looked half as fine'
"Your dear old mother used to say
"'As your father did In his old-time lid
"'Upon St. Patrick's Day"'
What a wonderful clambake!
The most wonderful clambake there ever was!
Yeah, wonderful.
What's eating you?
As if I didn't know.
I told you, I'm not interested in Katherine. She's not my type.
She's not my type, either. Forget it.
Sure, I'll forget it.
But you can't forget it. Why don't you quit fighting it, Ed?
After all, she's beautiful and she's smart...
And she's got a great throwing arm.
Great throwing arm? You just didn't look any further.
Remember the night we saw her swimming in the pool?
Remember?
No.
"No," he says.
In that gold bathing suit.
You're drooling.
Yeah, but Shirley's my type.
Yeah. She's kind of timid and sort of shy.
You should've seen me sweep her off her feet.
That's what they like, the rough stuff. You got to treat them rough.
Caveman stuff.
They like that caveman stuff.
She hits me over the head with her own club...
...slings me over her shoulder, carries me out of the cave into the woods.
And what'd you do?
I don't know. I was unconscious.
You missed the best part of the dream.
You think so?
- Mr. Lorgan, how are you? - Fine.
I'd like to have a chat with you.
I'll get a newspaper. I'll be back in a few minutes.
Won't you have a chair, Mr. Lorgan?
What's on your mind?
I liked the way you handled yourself last night at the clambake.
Yes, sir, I liked it a lot.
Thank you, Mr. Lorgan. What are you leading up to?
A job.
I'm thinking of opening up a cafй.
Big, swanky place for the carriage trade.
You know, I could use you as a show.
That's swell, but what about Dennis? He's my partner, you know.
- I think we can work that out. - Good.
How much will you pay?
You've been getting a lot of publicity. I can double your last vaudeville salary.
- It's a deal. - Good. When can you start?
Not until after the baseball season's over.
Not till then?
You don't think I could walk out now, do you?
We've practically got the pennant cinched.
I'm not interested in baseball.
I've got a chorus of girls waiting, ready to start to rehearse.
Thirty of them.
Thirty girls.
A bevy of beauties.
I'm sorry you can't make it.
Wait a minute. Couldn't you hold off for a while?
The baseball season's almost over.
I'll tell you what I'll do. Are you going to be in town for a while?
Sure. The season finishes here.
Couldn't you arrange to get away at nights for rehearsals?
No. I couldn't do that.
Then there's no use of talking any more.
- So long, Eddie. - Wait a minute.
Look, I'll do it, but...
I'll do it, but keep it quiet, will you?
Sure. I wouldn't want to get you in a jam.
I'll tell you what. I'll call you tomorrow to tell you when we start rehearsals.
- So long. - So long.
- So long, fellows. - So long.
- How do you know it'll work? - With Eddie? It's a cinch.
Didn't you see his face when I told him there'd be 30 chorus girls?
Look what one dame did to a guy named Samson.
Who was he, a fighter?
I'm all set. I'll get the act framed. Then when the season's over, you're in.
Of course, I'll have to sneak out every night.
You'll cover up for me, won't you?
What else can I do? I'm your pal.
That a boy!
You can't rehearse all night and play ball the next day.
A few bad breaks, we can lose the pennant!
Quit worrying, will you? I can handle it. I'm in great shape.
WOLVES DEFENDING PENNANT LEAD AT HOME
Wolves Lead Dwindles
Wolves Drop Four Straight
Pass me the milk, will you, Ray?
"Wolves continue slump in game with Chicago.
"The Wolves dropped another game today to Chicago...
"...who swept to a 6-5 victory aided by a flurry of last inning hits...
"...and three startling errors by..."
By shortstop, Eddie O'Brien. Go ahead, read it.
What's got into him, anyway?
The kid's lost his pep. No coordination, no zip. He plays like a tired old man.
He ain't tired. He's been hitting the hay early every night. In fact, too early.
- That's very unusual for O'Brien. - I should say so.
Something's eating him.
What do the other boys say? Have they got any ideas?
No, not exactly.
- Come on, what is it? - It's nothing.
If O'Brien stays in this slump, we can kiss the pennant goodbye.
So if you have any ideas, open up. Come on.
Tell her.
It's really got two angles, see?
You take a race horse.
He's going great, winning every out.
But, all of a sudden he starts looking around.
He's getting restless, see?
What has O'Brien got to be restless about?
It's like he says, you take that race horse when he starts looking around...
...he's looking at another nag.
With a ribbon in her hair.
That sounds like a pretty silly reason for losing ball games.
But, if O'Brien wants to chase the girls, let him.
Who's stopping him? As long as he keeps decent hours.
Yes, that other angle.
What else is bothering our little race horse?
You.
Me?
You're the other nag.
I'm the...
Really?
You want me to play up to O'Brien, so we'll win the pennant, is that it?
Can you think of a better reason?
No, of course not.
Personally, I'm only interested in his batting average.
I can't rehearse all night and play ball in the afternoon. I need some rest.
Get someone else. I'm through.
You'll have all next week to rest.
I don't care about your ball playing. I've got to get this show set.
And I got to play baseball. I feel like a heel letting the team down.
That pennant means extra dough to those guys.
I don't like that kind of talk.
Don't threaten me!
I'm not coming down, not tonight or any night.
I think that boy needs a little talking to.
Hello, Eddie.
Hiya.
What's your hurry?
I'm tired. I'm gonna hit the hay.
Wait a minute.
Let's have a little talk?
Just you and me?
Come on.
If it's about my batting average, there's nothing left to talk about.
That's why I want to get some sleep.
That's just it.
Maybe you're getting too much sleep.
That can happen, too, you know.
You see, it's this way.
You're just like a horse.
I mean, a racehorse.
You're all nerves. You're too finely trained...
...and all of a sudden, after you win a race, well...
...you start looking around.
What am I looking at?
Don't you know?
It's a long time since I've been a racehorse.
Anyway, Eddie, what I'm trying to say is that...
...maybe you're getting restless. You should relax more.
Get out and just bust out. You know?
I really think it might do you some good.
Get yourself a girl, maybe, and just...
...bust out.
What girl am I gonna...
..."bust out" with?
I don't know, but...
...if you can't find one...
...there's always me.
You?
You want to go out with me?
You're asking me?
It's for the team.
Sure, the team.
Your batting average, you know.
Sure, I know.
You've been making errors.
Am I making one now?
You're the prettiest manager in baseball.
You're certainly the prettiest shortstop.
I've been a foul ball up to now...
...but it's all gonna be different from here in.
Goodnight, Miss Higgins.
Eddie, wait.
Don't you want to bust out?
Right now all that counts is winning that pennant.
I'll take a rain check on the other.
I'm going to lay that pennant right at your feet.
But, baby, when I do, we're gonna bust out in every town in this league.
Hello, Eddie.
I hope I'm not intruding. Good evening, Miss Higgins.
Run along. I'll see you tomorrow.
This is why you missed the rehearsal tonight?
I thought you said you needed a rest.
Rehearsal? What's he talking about?
Doesn't she know?
He's been rehearsing every night for the past couple of weeks.
Rehearsing every night?
For a show that I'm putting on.
The girls are gonna miss you tonight. They need you badly.
- The girls? - Listen, I'll explain all this tomorrow.
From now on, they can have him.
And the team can get along without him for the rest of the season.
Personally, I can get along without him for the rest of my life.
I guess I can get along without you, too, Eddie, from now on.
It's beginning to penetrate my thick skull.
You must've bet a lot of money against the Wolves.
The little boy's beginning to get smart.
So you played me for a sucker.
I had to protect my investment.
There's no point in giving you the routine...
...about baseball being a great game, and keeping it clean for the kids.
- You'd just be wasting your time. - That's what I thought.
Come on.
Wolves In Slump As O'Brien Shelved
PENNANT PLAY-OFF TODAY
Come on, folks. Get a program before the game starts. Program.
We want O'Brien. We want O'Brien.
Louder!
We want O'Brien!
This is the guy they need.
No, he went all to pieces.
What do you mean all to pieces? Anybody can have a slump once in a while.
Look.
We want O'Brien!
Louder.
We want O'Brien! We want O'Brien!
I knew it was you, Eddie.
It's O'Brien, fellas. He's sitting right here.
Get in there and play!
Nobody asked me.
We'll carry you if it'll do any good.
Holy smoke! Look, it's Eddie!
Hey, Eddie!
That a boy, Eddie!
What are you going to do?
There's nothing to be done.
It won't hurt to talk to him.
Mike, there's nothing to talk about.
He's probably in no condition to play.
- Put him out there and see. - We have plenty of time before the game.
No.
You can talk to him if you want to.
That a boy, Eddie! Get in there!
If he goes in, we can kiss our $20,000 goodbye.
You give up too easily.
What are you talking about? What $20,000?
- Have you boys been betting against them? - Shut up!
O'Brien mustn't play today, boys.
- That's it. - Okay.
A change in the line-up for today's game.
O'Brien at shortstop for the Wolves.
Denny, come here.
- What are you doing here? - They're gonna get him!
- Get who? - Eddie. They're out to get him!
- What? - I heard Lorgan and his men talking.
They've bet a lot of money against the Wolves.
They're bad luck! They won't stop at anything!
- You've got to tell Eddie not to play. - He'd play anyway.
But you've got to stop him from playing!
Sure. Stop him from playing.
Yeah, I'll stop him.
How about giving them the old routine, the gag?
- You got the soft ball? - Right there.
Come on, let me have it.
Hurry up. Let me have it.
Fellas, come here. I think he's hurt.
Get a doctor!
Is there a doctor?
- Looks as if our boy was really hurt. - Yeah. What do you know?
- I'm Dr. Winston. - Right here, Doc.
- Open up, boys. - Here he is, Doctor.
Better get him to the locker room.
- Get him up. Take it easy. Go ahead. - Take it easy, boys.
There ain't nothing left for us to do.
Maybe he's stunned for a few minutes. We must keep him out.
They don't know you. Pretend you're doctors and keep O'Brien out.
He'll be out, Joe.
Take it easy now, boys.
- Put him right down here. - Careful with him, very careful.
- Give me room, boys. I'm Dr. Karl. - I'm Dr. Stevens.
- How is he? - It may be a concussion.
Concussion?
- Get out of here. We'll take care of him. - Boys, back in the field.
Come on, Miss Higgins. He'll be all right.
I don't suppose you have a stethoscope with you?
Just caught me short.
Why don't you run along? We don't all have to be here.
Thank you very much. I would like to see the game.
What is it?
It's 2:10.
Run along and enjoy the game.
That's a nice fellow.
- He's a light sleeper, ain't he? - Yeah.
Call it.
- Heads. - You win.
He's safe!
- How is he? - They say they may have to operate.
What?
Denny, what's all this about gamblers?
- Who told you? - Shirley did.
Don't you start that! I know you knocked him out on purpose.
Look, I was in a spot. You don't want a dead shortstop, do you?
Why didn't you call the cops?
I was scared. Why didn't you tell me?
How did I know you were gonna bean him with a hard ball?
- Have you seen him? - He's still out.
The doctors won't let me in. They're gonna operate.
Operate! In there? That's impossible!
- That's what they're saying. - I'm going in there.
Is it that bad?
You hit him next time, will you? My knuckles are getting sore.
You can't come in here!
- Why not? - Doctor's orders, and I'm the doctor!
This man's been hurt very bad. Shut the door and get out of here!
Those two aren't doctors! Come on, quick.
You can't come in here!
He's safe.
Hold it!
Hold it! Enough!
He's safe!
There they are, Officer!
Wait a minute. What's the hurry?
Stop him somebody! Denny!
Stop him!
Just a second.
I hardly touched him.
I guess I don't know my own strength.
- Take him away, fellows. - Come on, boys.
All right, play ball! Batter up!
Get in there and send Goldberg around.
Just watch me.
- Slappy, is he still out? - Yeah.
I don't think he's seriously hurt, Miss Higgins. He's merely stunned.
Darling!
Darling, please, look at me!
Eddie, can you talk? How do you feel?
I feel fine.
I feel wonderful.
Then you just lie right here and don't you move.
Who's moving?
Darling, I was so worried when Dennis hit you on the head with the ball.
Where is he?
I'll murder him! I'll kill him!
Let me go!
He did it on purpose!
No, Eddie, he didn't!
Wait a minute! Hold it!
Let me at him!
Get a hit. You can catch him.
Yeah! Give me a bat.
I can explain the whole thing.
Come on, Eddie!
Eddie, stop!
Wait!
"Keep your seats, hold your hats
"It's not the finish of the show
"The love scene must be played out
"Before the final fade out.
"Sinatra gets Garrett
"Kelly gets Williams
"For that's the plot the author wrote
"So turn this duet into a quartet
"And end it on a happy note
"Like a Philadelphia scrapple
"Like a Washington exposй
"Like the St. Louis Blues or the Dallas News
"It's strictly USA
"Like a Saturday night on Main Street
"Like a Ford or a Chevrolet
"Like potato chips or comic strips
"It's strictly USA
"Take Judy Garland
"Take Kathryn Grayson
"Take Mr. Crosby
"Or Fred Astaire
"Don't let the movies thin 'em up
"'Cause they look so pretty when we pin 'em up
"Like the annual Elks convention
"Like a Rotary Club soiree
"Like Masonic halls or firemen's balls
"Like honeymooning at Niagara Falls
"They're really here to stay
"Cause it's strictly USA"
THE END