we're bringing the dance party outside
[Music]
guys
Embrace I didn't know it in this moment
but everything was about to
[Music]
end I Know Nothing in life is meant to
last
forever everything eventually ends in
one way or
another and that's the beauty of it
all life really is this series of
fleeting moments emotions and
[Music]
experiences I guess I just could have
never imagined this all ending in the
way it
did
someone I really genuinely thought I
could
trust recently
has deeply deeply hurt
me it was hard to process that my dream
life life on the road living and
traveling out of my van was now
over these plans I invested everything
into all had abruptly
[Music]
failed against
me come back and now you remember
me sh off when they
found it's been
[Music]
she so I had to move back home back to
this place I thought I
outgrown and I was left alone at my
absolute lowest this is the worst my
mental health has like ever been for the
past 3 months I have not been able to
eat or sleep properly like I'm genuinely
shocked this is literally the most
insane situation I've never in my life
been so confused I've literally lost
thousands of dollars my camera equipment
footage I need for the whole borderless
series everything just like fell apart
this is just like not the plan I never
wanted to be back
here I just have like no idea what I'm
supposed to do now about everything dude
like this is genuinely a [ __ ]
disaster I started therapy yesterday
I'm supposed to write out some of my
thoughts and
feelings I guess I'm just
devastated I think I've always had a
hard time making friends getting close
to people it just feels like everyone
always
leaves no matter how close I think I am
with someone One day things are just
different and I just wish I knew
why
[Music]
last week I bought a
guitar I'm terrible so far but I've been
having a really hard time dealing with
the
[Music]
silence
[Music]
the more time goes on the less I know
what to think or feel I've just never
been so
disoriented all these memories
everything I ever thought was real I
can't stop questioning now was it all
really a
lie what even is the truth
anymore
on the
[Music]
road put on the dance show the dance
party outside
[Music]
guys what if the truth is I should have
never
trusted maybe I shouldn't have ever let
my guard down
[Music]
I've always feared this sense of
Abandonment this feeling of
betrayal so why did I actually believe
this time would be different how could I
be so
naive I don't know if I'll ever figure
out the answers to all my questions but
last last night I got my first full
night of sleep in
months I've been working on accepting
that I can't change
anything I can only really choose where
it will all lead me
[Music]
next depression is a Relentless haunting
Affliction but with cocy treatment we
were seeing immediate reductions in
depression symptoms
these days I feel distant from the
person I once
[Music]
was all I really do now is edit my
films practice
guitar micros soloc
cybin and well
Journal today I realized it's been 4
months since the last time I hung out
with
anyone I know it's probably not healthy
to spend all this time isolating myself
but it's safe here in my room
[Music]
alone
[Music]
hey Natalie uh it's Simon um I tried
calling you earlier because basically I
want to ask you if you'd be interested
on going on an adventure sometime I know
it's like literally last minute but I'm
going to be in Canada next week and I
know you're kind of close to there so
yeah just let me know if you're
free so I was hesit to say yes but I've
really missed
[Music]
traveling I guess my main concern is
well I've only met Simon once before
back while I was on the road last year
so I really have no idea how this
adventure is going to
go I don't even really know if I'm ready
yet but I think I've been through a lot
the past few months so I'm just hoping
my life can only go up from here
woohoo FC on the
road oh
[ __ ] oh my God I really hope I have
everything I need to have dude this is
so scary
actually hi hi
passport okay those are usually the
options just leave
together I'm in Canada what the
hell oh my god there he is what's up
Uber ride for
Simon all
right let's go we are here on the boat
we made it I didn't know it in the
moment but everything was about to begin
why' you want to go in this adventure
together
um first of all try to live out of a
van but I want to get to know you better
you seem like a really cool person and
this is like potentially my last trip
before I go back to school so it's like
whatever happens happens and I'm going
to enjoy it because who knows the next
time I'll be doing something like this
you
know that fairy ride to Vancouver Island
was only the
start it was the start of something
better than I could have ever even
[Music]
imagined
wonder where Natalie
is oh let's go baby
[Laughter]
girl feel the
same I know we'll never
try oh wait how do you use this I don't
think it works God crap
you oh my god BR you be sleeping in
here it couldn't
CH I feel like it'll be
okay I don't know [ __ ] come
on oh my God
everything
when the adventure first started I'll
admit I didn't know if we would even get
along that
well if anything I honestly just saw the
trip is more of an escape from
everything I was going
through I this is just beautiful just
trying to be present trying to not think
about like I yeah that's what this is in
a way like it's almost like I'm kind of
running from these things that have been
kind of bothering
me being back outside in nature did help
me for a
while it helps me remember how
insignificant all my problems are in the
grand scheme of
[Music]
everything
I started to think maybe I was never
supposed to figure out all the answers
maybe I was never meant to understand it
all now I should just try to experience
whatever life even really
[Music]
is some kind
of a journey
no dude it's dude that's a lot Simon cut
his feet on the Rocks okay I have
Band-Aids in the back yeah we have like
a first shade kit here okay that's fine
I quickly realized that trying to travel
and live out of my van with Simon was
going to be interesting oh my God I'm
about to
rage oh
[Music]
no that smells so bad between all of our
clothes smelling like literal ass haat
items trying to shower with only a water
jug guys this is Peak van life right
here oh my God eise e realizing the eggs
molded in the fridge ew what the
[ __ ] this is some foul ass
[ __ ]
literally we've been like trying to get
on the road all day and everything keeps
going wrong and just all the realities
that come with driving around a
30-year-old vehicle one windshield
wiper this thing feels like it's going
to fall apart at any second I
swear just I think the brak's overheated
because the right tire started smoking
so we might need someone to tow us well
we can certainly assist you it really
seemed like there was always something
going wrong in one way or another we
called the wrong AAA at first but
there's one in Canada apparently that's
specifically but having someone there to
make light of the whole situation and
laugh with about everything really meant
a lot to me oh could it be yes wait no
no
no Natalie actually called me fat
because I'm on the side of the wheel
that exploded and you know what that's
getting to
me
we got like no sleep last night cuz we
were waiting for a tow truck until like
3:00 a.m. and then the tow truck that
did finally show up couldn't fit us on
the van so we had to we literally had to
spend the night at of stop
sign
[ __ ] bro this is not where I expected
to be this morning what the hell I'm
riding on a sketchy ass tow truck in the
in the back of my van oh my
God sure this was never a part of the
plan or where I expected to
be but when I was on the road with Simon
all my failed plans and expectations
suddenly didn't seem to matter as much
anymore how did we end up your action I
think this is one of those moments that
you will not forget you know because of
how like just random it is you know it's
so cool like oh we'll just sleep in a
Walmart parking lot tonight you know but
then we end up here somehow know how we
end I have
no
R let's go
what really oh
[ __ ] but I feel like this Trip's been so
good because like before we were both
like in a tough place I'd say 100% yeah
yeah to say the least but I feel like it
it's this like random spontaneous breath
of fresh air that we both needed so I
appreciate it appreciate I appreciate I
appreciate this trip as well thank you
for coming with me thanks for thanks for
hosting me in spiffy do you think you
can live in
solitude for your whole life and just
live life that way or do you think like
humans need love and humans need
relationships I think we need
relationship cuz I I feel like I tried
to do that for like a lot of years I
like just isolated I'm working on
myself but I'm also lonely yeah like you
you can't I don't think I don't think
anyone can be alone for lot amount of
[Music]
time oh my God
and oh
my so before I even really realized it
we were getting
close maybe even a little too close how
are your balls
doing
all right all right thanks for asking
thanks for checking up I was I was
interested in an update anyways what I'm
trying to say is it honestly caught me
off guard to be able to open up in the
way that I did look at how fat that
puddle is
[Music]
oh normally I'm just really closed off
with most people and it takes a lot for
me to actually get close to
somewh Natalie's amazing we die it's
your
fault face before this trip I just
genuinely didn't think i' would ever be
able to trust anyone ever
again but somehow in some way there I
was exploring that random Beach on
theber island with my new friend
[Music]
Simon
[Music]
what's something deep and meaningful
Natalie say something so deep and
profound
balls the first night like I just wake
up to this
and she's one of those snores that
goes you know what I mean like it's not
even a [ __ ] you it's
a it's like what is that bro it's like
we're not in a cartoon right now this is
what I wake up to in the middle of the
night like like I'll see like some
wrestling in the sleeping bag
and I'll wake up to this
sound so for the first time in a long
time life started to feel a little less
heavy
[Applause]
[Music]
I don't know what do you think it takes
for you to form like a really close
connection with someone like what do you
think it's been specifically I don't
know why but it seems like you're easy
to open up to easy to talk to really
that's a huge compliment thank you and I
think as you get older and you kind of
like move through more relationships you
get a better understanding of the type
of people you get along with the most
and you know it might be hard to get to
that point cuz you might have to go
through a lot of relation ship that
don't work out you know that show you
what you might not want in a
relationship but after a few talks with
those people you can just kind of tell
like hey I'm going to have a good time
with this person this could be this
going to out oh I just want OT you're do
you see it do you see it oh my
God I've never really had a friend quite
like Simon before let's
go in
the I like I did a flip like I like
someone with such a vibrant
personality someone who loves caned
befferoni so
much seriously it's it's a little
concerning we got beeron on the [ __ ]
curtain beeron is everywhere it's on
this it's on that it's on that in case
that be hits later you'll see me back
there yeah Simon really just is the type
of friend you can talk to about anything
and everything half the things I'm
telling you now I would have never
[ __ ] told you when we first started
this trip like how Natalie admitted to
having a no
no oh [ __ ] how do you feel right now so
happy a bit scared cuz it's we're pretty
it's a little sketch but it's definitely
a little sketch up here but worth
it
this past year has shown me through
meeting people like you and all my new
friends that maybe success is more in
the people that you surround yourself
with rather than those metric goals like
yes we have these like really pretty
views and everything but it's literally
those moments that we have where none of
that matters that's something I've taken
away from this it's like it's about the
people not about like you know
how pretty the place is or where we're
going before adventure together I used
to question a
lot I know you might not have even had
all the answers
yourself is it but I've learned a lot
from
you now I understand everything a little
better I think you helped me
remember just how beautiful full life
can really
be so me and Simon just pull up to the
final spot of this trip this is the last
night we have together in the road but I
think we definitely making the most out
of it
you so thank you Simon thank you for
everything thank you for helping me find
the beauty in all of life's apparent
disasters thank you for getting me back
out into the world and showing me that I
don't deserve to spend the rest of my
life alone in my room it's been a great
adventure with you and I've learned a
lot I think you showed me the importance
human
[Music]
connection but most importantly you
showed me what it means to trust again I
feel so I love you so much dud thank
[Music]
you
[Music]
yo
no way no way dude the beef no
[Music]
way that was insane taught me how to
find beauty in life's apparent disasters
most
importantly oh my God you showed me what
it means to trust again oh my god dude I
love you I love
you I I need to get the shot sh this is
my shot got my cinematograph for Natalie
Liv behind the camer I'm nothing more
than a tripod nothing more oh this is
going up my ass yeah this is going up my
ass
too I think I was supposed to get an
outfit for it too that's the sad part I
just have this nude baby neglective
mother wow wo this spot is perfect this
spot is insane look look at the view of
this
Chevy actually wait why are we doing
this why no one comes
from the laundry mat just just smell
their [ __ ]
[Music]
clothes