[音乐] [MUSIC]
那段标志音乐让你兴奋不已，对吗？ That logo music just gets you pumped, right?
很抱歉，我只是很高兴来到这里。 I'm sorry, I'm just excited to be here.
有一阵子了。 It's been a while.
很长一段时间以来，我都不确定我是否还能回来。 For a long time, I wasn't sure I'd ever be back.
迪士尼收购了福克斯， Disney bought Fox, there was a whole
无聊的配股， boring rights issue,
啦啦啦啦啦啦啦。 blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
但后来他们想要我， But then, it turned out they wanted me,
这个人甚至不配拥有自己的电影。 the one guy who shouldn't even have his own movie.
更不用说特许经营权了。 Much less a franchise.
你们都太愚蠢了。 You have all so stupid.
瞧，我们知道这个东西的名字，所以 Look, we know the title of this thing, so
我知道你在疑惑什么。 I know what you're wondering.
如果没有 How are we going to do this without
玷污洛根的名誉？ dishonoring Logan's memory?
我会告诉你怎么做。 And I'll tell you how.
不是。 We're not.
圣。 Holy.
我要告诉你一个小秘密。 I'm going to let you in on a little secret.
金刚狼没有死。 Wolverine is not dead.
当然，这为这个悲伤的故事画上了完美的句号， Sure, it made for a perfect ending to a very sad story,
但再生治疗因子的作用原理并非如此。 but that's not how regenerative healing factors work.
你以为我想在这里 You think I want to be out here in
美丽的北达科他州市中心， beautiful downtown North Dakota,
挖出独一无二的金刚狼？ digging up the one and only Wolverine?
不，谢谢。 No, thank you.
但我的整个世界的命运都岌岌可危。 But the fate of my entire world is at stake.
他可能没有过上最好的生活，但是 He may not be living his best life, but
他肯定没有死。 he sure as hell ain't dead.
答对了。 Bingo.
快艇。 Yahtzee.
是的，是的，是的，是的，是的。 Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
该死的！ Damn it!
王八蛋！ Son of a bitch!
操！混蛋！ Fuck! Motherfucker!
我的世界完蛋了！ My world is fucked!
那很奇怪。 That was weird.
我现在平静多了。 I'm much calmer now.
瞧，我并不是一名科学家， Look, I'm not a man of science,
但你看上去已经去世了。 but you seem incredibly passed away.
但我很高兴见到你。 But it's good to see ya.
说实话，我一直想 I gotta be honest, I've always wanted to
和你一起骑行，洛根。 ride with you, Logan.
你和我将面对一个死侍和一个金刚狼。 You and me getting into a Deadpool and a Wolverine.
真是他妈的糟透了。 Just fucking shit up.
你能想象其中的乐趣吗？ Can you imagine the fun,
混乱、残余？ the chaos, the residuals?
我可以吗？ Could I of mine?
没有什么能让我回到 It's nothing that'll bring me back to
生活速度比一大袋现金还要快。 life faster than a big bag of matted cash.
我也是，休。 Me too, Hugh.
不不不不。 No, no, no, no.
唉，他必须变得高尚起来，真正地死去。 Ugh, he had to get all noble and die for real.
他妈的！ God damn it!
我现在确实需要你的帮助。 I could really use your help right now.
等待！ Wait!
我警告你！我不是一个人！ I'm warning you! I'm not alone!
韦德·温斯顿·威尔逊！ Wade Winston Wilson!
您已被时空管理局逮捕。 You're under arrest by the Time Variance Authority.
罪孽太深重了，出来吧！ With too many crimes for this, come out!
哦，你这是在以死相搏，你这个女球员。 Oh, you're the courtesy death fighting you dame player.
最后的机会！ Last chance!
扔掉你的武器，和平地走出来！ Throw out your weapons and come out peacefully!
我不会把我的武器给你！ I'm not gonna give you my weapons!
但我保证不使用它们。 But I promise not to use them.
人体共有206块骨头。 There are 206 bones in the human body.
如果我在看《绯闻女孩》，那就给 207。 207 if I'm watching Gossip Girl.
我们开始吧，尽最大努力。 Here we go, maximum effort.
我会把每件物品赠送出去。 I'll give away every item.
你知道这只是一场噩梦 There comes the You know it's just a nightmare
我现在可能要开始一场战斗了 I'm probably gonna start a fight now
现在这不可能是对的 Now this can't be right
宝贝 来吧 Baby, come on
没有什么可以甜蜜 Nothing can be sweet
没有时间处理一点危机 No time for a little bit of a crisis
现在是时候离开了 Now it's time to leave
并独自一人 And make it alone
我知道我不能再忍受 I know that I can't take no more
我不是男人 I ain't no man
我不想见你 I don't wanna see you
回来找我，再见 Back for me, bye bye bye
我会为你变得愚蠢 I'm gonna be a fool for you
但你只是另一个玩家 But you're just another player You came into it
你不应该恨我，但那没关系 You shouldn't be hating me But it ain't no matter
你可以再见 You can bye bye bye
再见 Bye bye
我真的不想让事情变得困难 I don't really wanna make it tough
我只想小睡一会儿 I just wanna take a nap
我自己也疯了 I'm myself crazy
但这不是谎言 你可以再见 But it ain't no lie You can bye bye bye
你会口渴 You're gonna be thirsty
法律的真理 With the truth of the law
姑娘，你妈妈会来 Girl, your mother will come
最好不要从你的盒子外面询问。 Better not ask from outside your box.
（大喊） (yelling)
你会口渴 You're gonna be thirsty
快点 Come on
我只知道我不能再忍受了，你不是男人 I just know that I can't take no more You ain't no man
我想看到你 I wanna see you
回来找我吧，再见，再见，再见 Back for me, bye bye bye Bye bye
我会为你变得愚蠢 I'm gonna be a fool for you
但你只是另一个玩家 But you're just another player
你闯进来让我成了傻子 You came into it You made me a fool
你让我变得像个傻子 再见再见 You made me a fool Bye bye bye bye
我会让你变得坚强 I'm gonna make you tough
我只想小睡一会儿 I just wanna take a nap
我将会成为一个傻子 And I'm gonna be a fool
我自己也疯了 I'm myself crazy
但这不是谎言，你会为自己而傻 But it ain't no lie You're gonna be a fool for you
我不想成为你的傻瓜 I don't wanna be your fool
在这场双人比赛中 In this game for two
所以我需要一个男人来吧，让我们让事情变得更好。 So I need a man Come on, let's make it better.
回来吧，我疯了 Back for me, I'm crazy
但这不是谎言 But it ain't no lie
你让我傻了 You made me a fool
你让我变得愚蠢，我自己也疯了 You made me a fool I'm myself crazy
但你却让我成了傻子 But you made me a fool
你让我傻了 You made me a fool
你让我傻了 你让我傻了 You made me a fool You made me a fool
你让我变成了一个傻瓜，我也会成为一个傻瓜 You made me a fool I'm gonna be a fool
我只想小睡一会儿 I just wanna take a nap
我自己也疯了 I'm myself crazy
但这不是谎言 But it ain't no lie
但是但是但是但是 But, but, but, but
（枪声） (gunshot)
我现在浑身都湿透了。 I am soaking wet right now.
（尖叫）说清楚点，我对这一切并不感到自豪。 (screaming) To be clear, I'm not proud of any of this.
肆意的暴力， The wanton violence,
恋尸癖的气息， the whiff of necrophilia,
这不是现在的我，这也不是我想要成为的人。 it isn't who I am, it isn't who I wanna be.
我想成为谁？ Who I wanna be?
好吧，为了帮助你理解这一点， Well, to help you understand that,
我得送你回去。 I gotta take you back.
我穿越时空的快乐之旅， My little joy ride I took through space and time,
直到那一天，一切都改变了。 to the day that changed everything.
（激昂的音乐） (dramatic music)
（枪声） (gunshots)
我真不敢相信我终于到了这里。 I can't believe I'm finally here.
我等待这一刻已经很久了。 I've waited for this moment for so long.
先生，谢谢您见我。 Thank you, sir, for seeing me.
我坚信我的服务将大有裨益 I firmly believe that my services could be of great use
到您的组织。 to your organization.
现在我知道我被抓到手淫了 Now, I know I was caught masturbating
在斯塔克大厦的大厅里。 in the lobby of Stark Tower.
砸碎横幅？ Shmash the banner?
我确信你做到了。 I'm sure you did that.
抱歉，那是什么？ I'm sorry, what was that?
不，我很抱歉。 No, I'm sorry.
那时你就会有玩具绿巨人的手，对吗？ That's when you get those toy hulk hands, right?
然后你只要低下头， And then you just, you look down and you just,
你鼓起勇气，然后蹂躏腹部。 you brace yourself and you ravage the midsection.
我明白了，好的，谢谢你。 I get it, okay, thank you.
这幅画是画出来的。 The picture's painted.
你明白了。 You get the gist.
您今天来这里究竟是为了什么？ What exactly brings you here today?
嗯，好的，我在乎。 Well, okay, I care.
我知道我把一切都变成了笑话， I know I'm turning everything into a joke,
但我在乎，我想利用这种感觉 but I care and I want to use that feeling
为了某件重要的事情。 for something important.
我不想有什么关系。 I don't want to matter.
并让我的女孩知道我很重要。 And to show my girl that I matter.
你知道，我感觉我在浪费 And, you know, I feel like I'm wasting
这里的好东西。 the good stuff here.
难道这个男人不打算和我们一起吗？ Is the man not going to be joining us?
男人？ The man?
是的，如果他要这么做的话我就应该这么说。 Yeah, I should say this if he's going to.
据你现在所知，我就是那个男人。 As far as you can tell right now, I'm the man.
这个男人就是我。 The man is me.
我就是这种情况下的男人。 I am the man in this circumstance.
他现在不再做这种事了。 And he doesn't do this kind of thing anymore.
候选人？ Candidates?
会议。 Meetings.
入门级会议。 Entry-level meetings.
入门级？ Entry-level?
你不是司机吗？ Aren't you the chauffeur?
我可能是。 I, maybe.
常见的误解， Common misconception,
我的职业生涯确实是作为斯塔克先生的司机开始的。 I did begin my career as Mr. Stark's driver.
我迅速转向安全主管。 I quickly pivoted to the head of security.
保安队长？ The head of security?
安全主管，当然，是的，是的，是的。 The head of security, of course, yes, yes, yes, yes.
这就是我要审查你的简历的原因。 And why I am vetting your resume.
你似乎没有说明 You seem to have left out whether or not
您是否曾作为团队成员有过任何经验？ you had any experience as a member of a team.
您能否补充一点观点？ Could you maybe add a little bit of perspective?
哦，是的，当然。 Oh, yes, of course.
我是特种部队，但我主要是， I was Special Forces, but I was mainly,
我是 X-Force 的团队负责人，实际上也是创始人。 I was team leader, founder, really, of X-Force.
令人悲伤的是，他们全部阵亡了。 Sadly, they all perished in action.
这究竟是怎么回事？ How exactly did that happen?
嗯，警察说是重力，不过我们私下说说， Well, the police say gravity, but just between us,
他们在焦点小组的测试中表现不佳。 they didn't test well in the focus group.
他们要去电缆处。 They were to go to the cable.
哇，哇，哇，哇，我知道这是不可能的。 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, I can see this isn't going on.
请停止写作。 Please stop writing.
我只是想成为一名复仇者。 I'm just, I want to be an Avenger.
我想成为一名复仇者。 I want to be an Avenger.
你为什么想成为复仇者？ Why do you want to be an Avenger?
环顾四周，我的意思是， To look around you, I mean,
他们是最好的。 they're the best of the best.
他们所做的事情很重要。 And what they do matters.
我需要成为一名复仇者。 I need to be an Avenger.
先生，那女孩有点儿古怪， Sir, that girl is kind of had a bit of a shtick,
如果我不能扭转局面 and if I don't, you know, turn things around
用我的天赋做点什么， and do something with my gifts,
我觉得这对我来说没什么用， I don't think it's going to really work out for me,
我不会责怪她。 and I wouldn't blame her.
复仇者联盟是一群非常独特的超级英雄 Avengers are a very unique group of superheroes
不仅仅代表战斗 that stand for something more than just fighting
并穿着服装。 and wearing costumes.
我的意思是，人们尊敬我们。孩子们也尊敬我们。 I mean, people look up to us. Kids look up to us.
对不起，我们？ I'm sorry, us?
我不知道你是一名复仇者。 I wasn't aware that you were an Avenger.
从技术上来说，与“复仇者联盟”相邻。 Avengers adjacent, technically.
哦，你的超能力是什么？平行停车吗？ Oh, what's your superpower? Is it parallel parking?
我很抱歉。太残忍了。 I am so sorry. That was cruel.
我紧张的时候就会发脾气。这种事不会再发生了。 I lash out when I'm nervous. It won't happen again.
让我们直入主题吧。拜托。 Let's cut to the chase. Please.
你刚才说 You just said moments ago
你想成为一名复仇者，因为你需要它。 that you wanted to be an Avenger because you need it.
是的，先生，我明白。 Yes, sir, I do.
但复仇者联盟并不是因为他们需要才这么做的。 But the Avengers don't do the job because they need it.
他们做这份工作是因为人们需要他们。 They do the job because people need them.
你看出区别了吗？ Do you see the distinction?
是的先生。 Yes, sir.
霍根先生，我不知道 Please, Mr. Hogan, I don't
我想用我的余生 want to spend the rest of my life
就像一匹让人讨厌的只有一招的小马。 like an annoying one-trick pony.
好的。 All right.
哦天哪，你站起来了。 Oh, my God. You're standing.
是的，现在是我们站起来的时候了。 Yeah, now's the time that we stand.
该死的。 Damn it.
问题可能是 The problem might be that
你伸手的有点太高了。 you're reaching a little too high.
瞄准中间你就不会错过。 Aim for the middle and you'll never miss.
对吧？我觉得你心地善良。我 Right? I think you got a good heart. I
相信你所说的话。 believe what you're saying.
但并非每个人都是拯救世界的人。 But not everybody's a world-saving type.
我没有。我很高兴。对吧？ I'm not. I'm happy. Right?
我找到了自己的位置。 I found my place.
找到你的位置。 Find your place.
好的。回去吧。 All right. Get back out there.
我们会密切关注。祝你好运。 We'll keep an eye. Good luck.
嗯嗯。嗯嗯。嗯嗯。 Mm-mm. Mm-mm. Mm-mm.
赶上车。我想去 Shake Shack。 Catch the car. I want to hit Shake Shack.
遭到拒绝令我饥渴。 Rejection makes me hungry.
不不不，拜托你了。 No, no, no. Please.
不不不，好的。 No, no, no. Okay.
你知道他们说了什么？ You know what they say?
当一扇门关闭时， When one door closes,
你工作时的储物柜打开了。 your locker at work opens.
我们去卖一些经过认证的 Let's go sell some certified
二手车，妈的—— pre-owned vehicles, motherf--
从技术上来说，嘉年华不是小型货车。 Technically, the carnival's not a minivan.
这是一辆 MPV。 It's an MPV.
那么起亚与本田奥德赛相比如何？ So how does the Kia compare to the Honda Odyssey?
《奥德赛》？这个问题问得真好。 The Odyssey? That's a great question.
这他妈并不糟糕。 It doesn't fucking suck.
你知道，你无法回答 You know, you can't answer
不带脏话地提出问题。 the question without swearing.
对不起。告诉我我没有孩子。 I'm sorry. Tell me I don't have kids.
我并不是没有梦见过这样的事。 Not that I haven't dreamt of that.
你没有太多自然的性生活。 You don't have a lot of natural sex.
下次你就会得到它们了，朋友。是的。 You'll get them next time, pal. Yeah.
你看，你总是可以回到超级英雄的位置。 And look, you can always go back to super-heroing.
我的意思是，我知道我很想看到你重新穿上这套西装。 I mean, I know I'd like to see you back in the suit.
我没有把它放在储物柜里，以便我可以戴它。 I don't keep it in my locker so that I can wear it.
我把它放在我的储物柜里 I keep it in my locker in
如果这样我们就需要再次解决。 case we need to settle up again.
嘿，嘿，嘿。那东西在那儿干什么？ Hey, hey, hey. What is that doing in there?
我受够了。 I'm done.
哥们，我对此很满意。 Man, I'm fine with being done.
你看，销售是不是最匹配呢？ Look, is sales the best match?
可能没有。 Probably none.
这就是我一直想象的生活吗？ Is this the life that I always imagined for myself?
他妈的不！ Fuck no!
这对我来说正合适。 This is the right fit for me.
是啊，是糖熊。好的，威尔逊先生。 Sugar Bear, it is. Okay, Mr. Wilson.
我只是说，我们可以每月一次 I'm just saying, once a month, we could
去执行一个小任务。 go on a little mission.
我们是人类。我们渴望目标。 We're human beings. We crave purpose.
毕竟我们是死侍。 After all, we're Deadpool.
请不要再这么说了。我们不是死侍。 Please stop saying that. We're not Deadpool.
我甚至不再是死侍了。 I'm not even Deadpool anymore.
好吧，如果我们要面临中年危机，那就大手大脚吧。 Well, if we're gonna have a midlife crisis, go big.
几年前，一位朋友 A few years ago, a friend of
我的乳头被刺穿了 mine got his nipples pierced
带有钛链条， with a titanium chain that goes down and
附加到他的 Van Johnson 上。 attaches to his Van Johnson.
你是不是感觉很烦躁 Are you feeling Grumple
因为今天是你的生日，所以你穿高跷吗？ stiltskin because it's your birthday?
什么？ What?
不。 No.
惊喜！ Surprise!
好吧，你们很幸运我没有武装。 All right, you guys are lucky I'm not armed.
来这边。 Get in here.
这是六年前的事了。你们都已经死了。 This was six years ago. You'd all be dead.
然后他下了车，你 So then, he gets out of the cab, and you
不会相信。 would not believe it.
我转过身，发现了什么？ I turn around, and what do I find?
Airpods。Airpods！ Airpods. Airpods!
每次都是疯狂的故事。 Crazy stories. Every time.
来吧。单身时光。 Come on. Fingle time.
今天有销售吗？ Make any sales today?
你知道我没有。 You know I didn't.
你卖过什么吗 Did you sell any
Etsy 上的捕梦网或者其他什么？ dreamcatchers on Etsy or whatever it is?
我三天前就去做了这件事， I went to do it three days away, and I
不能一直背着它。放松。 can't keep carrying it. Relax.
我有钱。我卖了一些老血。 I have the money. I sold some old blood
我发现周围的压力药物。 pressure medication I found lying around.
你想杀我，混蛋。 You're trying to kill me, motherfucker.
我不是那个浇水的人 I'm not the one dousing
什么都加盐，混蛋。 everything in salt, motherfucker.
我每天都祈祷火能找到你 I pray every day that fire finds your
身体并完成工作 body and finishes the job
上帝没有胆量去做这件事。 God didn't have the nuts to do.
这很伤人。如果你能听到我脸上的表情， That's hurtful. If you could hear the look on my face,
你会闻到我有多悲伤。 you'd smell how sad I am.
你看着我好吗？ You watching me good?
英国大分裂。 Great British break-off.
噢，该死的。 Oh, God damn.
这件事阻碍了我自杀长达十年。 This shit stood between me and suicide for ten years.
这就是我的感受。 Those are my feelings.
堕胎、宗教自由、动物 Abortion, religious freedom, animal
权利、隐私权、疫苗、免费 rights, privacy rights, vaccines, free
市场资本主义、全球气候变化。 market capitalism, global climate change.
不，不，不，不，我们做爱吧，甜蜜。 No, no, no, no, sweet from let's fuck.
嗨，Kyo。嗨，Wade。 Hi, you, Kyo. Hi, Wade.
漂亮，假的眼影。 Nice, fake o'clock shadow.
这是来自法国的夏季挑染。 It's a summer balayage from the French.
其目的在于模仿太阳的自然亮点。 It's meant to mimic the natural highlights of the sun.
这是假发。这是发型系统。 It's a toupee. It's a hair system.
我喜欢你的发型，韦德。 I love your hair system, Wade.
谢谢。 Thank you.
想吸点可卡因吗？嘿，可卡因是 Want to do some cocaine? Hey, cocaine is
法吉说的一件事是禁止的。 the one thing that Faggy said is off-limits.
那玻利维亚人观看比赛怎么样？他们知道 What about Bolivian watching? They know
所有俚语。他们有一个列表。 all the slang terms. They have a list.
甚至滑雪板？甚至迪斯科舞会的烟尘。 Even snowboarding? Even disco dust.
白人女孩插嘴？甚至强行撞击。 White girl interrupted? Even force bump.
焦点转移。我甚至不会尝试糖粉甜甜圈。 Focus shift. I wouldn't even try powdered gonuts.
你想堆雪人吗？想，但是我不会。 Do you want to build a snowman? Yes, but I can't.
等在这​​儿。这儿？ Hold here. Here?
发生了什么事？这就是热点部分。 What happened? That's the buzz part.
谢谢你来。是的。 Thanks for coming. Yeah.
工作怎么样？哦，我升职了。 How's work? Oh, I got a promotion.
不可能。是的。 No way. Yeah.
虽然这是令人麻木的中层管理，但我很高兴。 It's mind-numbing middle management, but I'm happy.
那太棒了。 That's great.
你想见他吗？你好吗？ You want to see him? How are you?
嗯，是的。同事。 Um, yeah. Guy from work.
德曼。德曼？ Derman. Derman?
他很善良，很好。 He's kind. Good.
喜欢徒步旅行。 Likes to go hiking.
还没让我中枪。 Hasn't gotten me shot yet.
哇！现在才刚刚开始。 Wow. It's the early days.
你呢？有约会对象吗？ How about you? You seeing anyone?
不，不，我住在一居室 No, no, I live in a one-bedroom
公寓。与盲人 Al 同床睡。 apartment. Share bed with blind Al.
好的。好的。 All right. All right.
祝你生日快乐。 Happy birthday to you.
好的，好的，好的。 Okay, okay, okay.
生日。 Birthdays.
绕月球的每一次旋转确实都是一次新的冒险。 Every spin around the moon is a new adventure indeed.
Sundomous。好的，地球是圆形的。 Sundomous. Okay, round-earther.
我在哪里？生命的冒险。 Where was I? The Adventure of Life.
是的。这几年充满挑战。 Right. It's been a challenging few years.
我有一段时间没见到你们了。 I haven't seen you guys in a while. And
经历了很多。生活的改变。 through a lot. Change of life.
钉子？婊子，你在即兴发挥吗？ Nail-a-paw? Bitch, are you improv-ing?
我很抱歉让你看到这个，雪王。 I'm sorry that you had to see that, Yuki-oh.
但我很高兴。 But I'm happy.
你们知道，这是因为你们每一个人。 You know, that's because of each and every one of you.
我想说的是 I guess what I'm trying to say is how
我感到自豪，我非常感激， proud I am, how grateful I am,
站在房间里， to be standing in a room with every
我爱的“单身”人士。 single person I love.
我是世界上最幸运的人。 I'm the luckiest man alive.
许个愿吧，伙计。10-4，好伙计。 Make a wish, buddy. 10-4, good buddy.
我要蹲下去了 Going down.
韦德·威尔逊？哦，是的。舞者。 Wade Wilson? Oh, yeah. Dancers.
画家肯定命令你这么做。 The painter must have ordered you. Are
这些是警察服装吗？ those supposed to be cop costumes?
没关系。拿你的 Never mind. Take your
脱掉衣服，但留下头盔。 clothes off, but leave the helmets.
这不是《风月俏佳人》。我们在接吻，好吗？ And this isn't Pretty Woman. We're kissing, all right?
你们通常跳舞时听什么歌曲？ What song do you guys normally dance to?
哇，哇，哇，哇，哇，哇，哇，哇。 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
那应该很可怕吗？ Is that supposed to be scary?
欺辱对我来说并不是什么新鲜事， Hagging isn't new for me,
朋友，但这是给迪士尼的。 friendo, but it is for Disney.
瞧，我从来都不是一个天生的承受者。 Look, I've never been a natural bottom.
所以我们要慢慢来， So we're going to take things real slow,
我想要一些疯狂的眼神交流。 and I want some crazy eye contact.
不是你，是你。 Not you, you.
我看不到你的眼睛 I can't see your eyes through
面具，但我能感觉到它。 the mask, but I can feel it.
我们要继续沿着走廊走下去 We're going to move on down the hallway
这样我们就可以省去对哈塞尔岛进行清理的麻烦。 so we can spare a cleanup on Isle Hassel.
大家对这个星球有什么感觉？ How does everyone feel about this planet?
我不喜欢你。是的。 I don't like you. Yes.
让我们坚持这种态度， Let's hold on to that attitude,
而且我们会愤怒地这么做。 and we're going to do it angry.
[音乐播放] [MUSIC PLAYING]
威尔逊先生。 Mr. Wilson.
看来您在昏迷期间弄脏了自己。 You appear to have soiled yourself while unconscious.
我昏过去了。你是谁？ I was unconscious. Who are you?
我的名字叫悖论，悖论先生， I go by the name of Paradox, Mr. Paradox,
你坐在 TVA 这里， and you're sitting here at the TVA, the
时间差异管理局。 Time Variance Authority.
我们实际上是一个监督组织。 We're really a watchdog organization.
但我们其实比听起来更轻松， Except we're more lighthearted than that sounds,
带有某种复古讽刺意味。 with sort of throwback ironic twist.
我们负责保卫 And we're in charge of defending what's
被称为神圣时间线。 known as the sacred timeline.
妈的，这真是太垃圾了 Holy fuck, that is a shit ton of
第三部续集的展览。 exposition for a three-quel.
这是因为我使用了电锁的时光机，带了 Is this because I used Cable's Time Machine, brought a
几个人复活了，然后我又把它毁了。 couple of people back to life, then I destroyed it.
那是很久以前的事。 That was a long time ago.
是的，我们知道你滥用了时间线。 Yes, we're aware of your abuse of your timeline.
你对它太滥用了。 You were so abusive of it.
不，这跟那没关系。跟我一起走吧。 No, it has nothing to do with that. Walk with me.
我带你来这里，威尔逊先生，是为了告诉 I brought you here, Mr. Wilson, to tell
你很特别。 you that you're special.
事实上，你被选中是为了一个更高的目标， In fact, you've been chosen for a higher purpose,
甚至我自己都不清楚其目的，但可以拯救 a purpose unclear even to me, but one that could save
整个神圣的时间线 the entire sacred timeline
避免未来某个时候可能遭遇的可怕命运， from a possibly grisly fate sometime in the future,
这很可能需要报复。 which may very well need to be avenged.
这条神圣的时间线，我想我会 This sacred timeline, I assume I'm going
惊叹于它的电影般的感觉， to marvel at how cinematic it feels,
无端的引诱，不加区别地使用 gratuitous cameons, indiscriminate use of
方差，整个包。 variance, the whole package.
不，你告诉我。 No, you tell me.
美队？ Cap！
你不再迷失了。 You are no longer lost.
韦德 Wade
你可以成为英雄中的英雄。 You can be a hero among the heroes.
我们已经监视你有一段时间了。 We've been surveilling you for quite a while.
这是一个男孩站。 It's a boy station.
是的，时空管理局前哨站。 The TVA outpost, yes.
那是什么？ And what is that?
那是我吗？那是雷神吗？ Is that me? Is that Thor?
他哭了吗？ Is he crying?
我们不要太过分。 Let's not get ahead of ourselves.
那是在遥远的未来发生的事情。 That happens in the distant future.
托尔为何哭泣？ Why is Thor crying?
别跟她说话。别再这样了。 Do not speak to her. Stop that.
我带你来这里是为了给你一个机会， I brought you here to offer you an opportunity,
你多年前寻求的机会，但是 the opportunity you sought years ago but
但你还没有做好准备。 for which you were not ready.
我们相信你现在已经准备好了， We believe you're ready now,
准备好离开你的时间线 ready for a chance to leave your timeline
并加入最伟大的宇宙。 and join the greatest universe of all.
我即将给你你一直想要的东西。 I am about to give you the thing you've always wanted.
我闻到了你踩到的东西的味道。 I smell what you're stepping in.
奇迹的力量 The power of the Marvel
宇宙即将永远改变。 universe is about to change forever.
我只是旁白。 I am an aside.
我是... I am...
惊叹耶稣。 Marvel Jesus.
打扰一下。 Excuse me.
她正在朝这边走。 She's getting over here.
垃圾，福克斯 Suck it, Fox.
我在迪士尼乐园。 I'm on Disneyland.
去死吧！ Get fucked!
我在哪里签字？ Where do I sign?
哦，文书工作就此结束。 Oh, it's an ending for paper work.
很好。不是吹牛，但我不读书。 Good. Not to brag, but I do not read.
但有一件事我需要。 There is one thing I will need, though.
哦，滚开。 Oh, fuck off.
崇拜吧，胡子哥。 Adorn me, Beardo.
去他妈的！ Fuck it!
这是完美的。 It's perfect.
仅供参考，你的裁缝是个掠食者，但我喜欢它。 FYI, your tailor is a predator, but I love it.
舒适、无骆驼趾、新车气味和金刚砂。 Snug, no camel toe, new car smell, and adamantium.
卡托玛斯，你不应该这么做。 Katomas, you shouldn't have.
来吧。把它拿进去。 Go ahead. Take it in.
是的，你的内衣越来越紧了。 And yes, your underwear is getting tighter.
那家伙知道我在说什么。 That guy knows what I'm talking about.
他的穿着表明他属于中层管理阶层，但是 His clothes say middle management, but
他的眼睛在说着“操他妈的”。 his eyes say fucky fucky.
是的，你看上去很漂亮。 Yes, you look very nice.
好吗？你的伙伴已经准备好了 Nice? Your buddy here is ready to throw
这一切都离我远去了。 it all away from me.
你给你老婆打电话吗？ You calling your wife?
人力资源。 HR.
您的妻子是从事人力资源工作的吗？ Is your wife working HR?
我真高兴你接受得这么好。 I'm really glad you're taking this so well.
噢，我感觉很好。 Oh, I'm taking it well.
我从来没有遇到过出差旅行的问题。 I have never had a problem traveling for work.
话虽如此，我们应该谈谈假期舞蹈。 That said, we should talk vacation dance.
我比较喜欢工作一周，休息一周的那种人。 I'm more of a one-week-on, one-week-off kind of guy.
我认为这就是他们在丹麦所做的事情。 I think it's what they do in Denmark.
你永远不会在月球上看到丹麦国旗，但是...... You'll never see a Danish flag in the moon, but...
该死的，他们很高兴。 God damn it, they're happy.
现在，让我们在那里启动你的亚马逊 Fire Phone Now, let's power up your little Amazon Fire Phone there
然后让我回家，这样我就可以让我的朋友们知道 and sit me back home so I can let my friends know
他们已升级为门徒。 that they've been upgraded to Disciples.
是的。我听说你很明白。 Yep. I hear that you quite understand.
你将不会回到你的家 You will not be returning to your home
因为将无家可归。 because there will be no home to return to.
又来了，这次在我耳边？ Come again, this time in my ears?
这是你的宇宙，威尔逊先生。 This is your universe, Mr. Wilson.
这就是当宇宙 That is what happens when a universe
失去了其锚点。 loses their anchor being.
看看它的内部是如何腐烂的？ See how it decays from the inside?
这就是现实消亡的方式。 This is how a reality dies.
锚是什么？ What's an anchor being?
锚定生物是一个至关重要的实体 An anchor being is an entity of such vital importance
当他们死去的时候，他们的整个世界 that when they die, their whole world
慢慢地枯萎而消失。 slowly withers out of existence.
因为我没死，所以你刚刚中了彩票。 You've just won the lottery because I didn't die.
这只是一点中年危机，我现在好多了。 It's just a little midlife crisis, I'm better now.
我的天啊！ Oh, my God!
噢，别笑。 Oh, not to laugh.
你能想象如果你是主播的话会怎样吗？ Can you imagine if you were the anchor being?
是的。 Yeah.
不，不是你，威尔逊先生。 No, it isn't you, Mr. Wilson.
你的锚在自我牺牲中死去 Your anchor being died in an act of self-sacrifice
如此史诗般，让整个时间线都为之颤抖。 so epic that it sent shivers down the timeline.
我指的当然是金刚狼洛根。 I am referring, of course, to Logan, the Wolverine.
不要出现在该页面上。 Don't be on that page.
（音乐） (Music)
噢，就是这种感觉。 Oh, this is what it feels like.
洛根。 Logan.
当然。 Of course.
洛根。 Logan.
洛根！ Logan!
这家伙用叉子做手！ The guy forks for hands!
那只金刚狼！ That Wolverine!
是的，我明白了。 Yeah, I got it.
您现在可以关闭复古的死亡图形了。 You can turn your retro graphics of death off now.
让它停止。 Make it stop.
我们不这么做，威尔逊先生。我们 We're not doing it, Mr. Wilson. We
肯定无法阻止。 certainly can't stop it.
我们还有多少时间？ How long have we got?
大多数情况下，需要几千年。 In most cases, a couple thousand years.
嗯，很甜蜜。 Well, sweet.
大多数情况下都不够快，对我来说不是。 Most cases aren't fast enough, not for me.
这意味着什么？ What does that mean?
这意味着我被赋予了 It means that I have been tasked with
监督你的宇宙的终结 overseeing the end of your universe
不管文员们 and regardless of what the pencil pushers
楼上更喜欢 upstairs would prefer,
我不会浪费我的生命看着它死去 I will not waste my life watching it die
由于自然原因而缓慢地 slowly of natural causes.
我们以前只是修剪这些东西， We used to just prune these things,
简单、优雅、高效，但我听说 TVA simple, elegant, efficient, but I'm told the TVA
不想再这样做了。 doesn't like to do that anymore.
嗯，我知道。 Well, I do.
不管我所谓的上级怎么说， And no matter what my so-called superiors say,
多元宇宙不需要保姆。 the multiverse does not need a babysitter.
我们需要一个仁慈的杀手。 We need a mercy killer.
在这个例子中， And in this instance,
我是仁慈的杀手。 I am the mercy killer.
那个是什么鬼？ What in the macguffin is that?
这是威尔逊先生的时间记录。 That's a time-reper for Mr. Wilson.
他们正在加速。 An accelerant.
一旦完成，它将允许我 Once completed, it will allow me to
摧毁你的宇宙的时空矩阵。 destroy the space-time matrix of your universe.
你瞧，我不想为时空管理局工作。 You see, I don't want to work for the TVA.
我想成为时空管理局主人 (TVA)。 I want to be the TVA.
第一步是展示这一点 And the first step involves showing this
组织多少更多 organization how much more
它可以变得高效。 efficient it can become to it.
我将给你的宇宙一个快速 I will be giving your universe a swift
和富有同情心的结局。 and compassionate end.
不用担心，你的朋友不会有任何感觉。 And don't worry, your friends won't feel a thing.
事情就这样结束了。 It'll be over just like this.
哦，那是什么？ Oh, what's that?
相信我。 Trust me.
在我的这个宇宙里，你们都将成为其他人。 You're gonna all be other in my fucking universe.
用你的说法，是的。 In your parlance, yes.
两个在心里，一个在头脑里。 Two in the heart, one in the head.
瞧，威尔逊先生，您有两个选择。 Look, Mr. Wilson, you have two choices.
你可以和你的亲人团聚， You can either rejoin your loved ones and
比如说，72小时后它们就会集体消失， collectively cease to exist in, let's say, 72 hours,
或者你加入神圣的时间线。 or you join the sacred timeline.
你就结束了卑微而平庸的日子。 And you end your days of insignificance and mediocrity.
韦德。 Wade.
韦德，你终于，终于可以发挥重要作用了。 Wade, you can finally, finally matter.
这就是我真正想要的。 That's all I've ever really wanted.
我知道。 I know.
你知道，如果我在道德上不灵活，我就什么都不是。 And you know, I'm nothing if not morally flexible.
唔？ Hmm?
是的，是的。 Yep, yep.
我会做的。 I'll do it.
明智之举。 Wise choice.
神圣时间线很高兴有你。 Sacred timeline's happy to have you.
我说的是找到金刚狼 I was talking about finding the wolverine
并打断你的鼻子。 and breaking your fucking nose.
看那个。 Look at that.
找他。 Find him.
找他！ Find him!
而孩子，他真的转身了吗？ And boy, did he ever turn.
这又让我们回到这个问题。 Which brings us back to this.
对神圣尸体的亵渎。 The desecration of the sacred corpse.
哎哟，我的手臂呀。 Ow, my own fucking arm.
[尖叫] [screaming]
现在我们正在和我的孩子们谈话。 Now we're talking to my kids.
[尖叫] [screaming]
抱歉，金刚狼很难。 I'm sorry, wolverine is hard.
我停不下来。 I can't stop.
曼格尔尝试了。 Mangle tried.
[尖叫] [screaming]
你这个变态。 You sick fuck.
金刚狼是一个英雄，唯一的 Wolverine was a hero and the only thing
加拿大发生的一切真是太糟糕了。 on earth is shit to ever come out of Canada.
[尖叫] [screaming]
我不允许我国家的名字从你的臭嘴里蹦出来 Get my country's name out of your fucking mouth.
还有我的剑。 And my sword.
看那个。 Look at that.
哦，我得再找一个洛根。 Oh, I gotta find me another Logan.
一个活着的人。 An alive one.
大家别起来送了，我自己回去就行 Don't get up, guys. I'll see myself back.
洛根！ Logan!
我需要你跟我一起去。 I'm gonna need you to come with me.
谁在问？ Who's asking?
好吧，看看这个毛茸茸的小 Lou Retton。 Well, look at this little hairy Lou Retton.
你把着陆钩挂住了吗，我？ Did you stick the landing hook, I?
是的，你做到了，漫画风格的短篇之王。 Yes, you did, comic-accurate short king.
真是一个可爱的寡妇，wovee。 Such a cute widow, wovee.
提示他妈的蒙太奇，宝贝。 Cue the fucking montage, baby.
好吧，看上去一切都着火了。 All right, everything seems to be on fire.
你有一条龙吗？ You have a dragon?
噢，你的到处都写着锚。 Ooh, you have anchor being written all over.
眼罩？ Patch.
现在我们正在谈论。 Now we're talking.
哦，是的。 Ooh, yeah.
这就是整个该死的包裹。 That's the whole goddamn package right there.
我正在试演锚梁。 I'm auditioning anchor beams.
哦，那需要一些椰子油。 Oh, that's gonna need some coconut oil.
操，哥们，操。 Fuck, dude, the fuck.
你还好吗？ Are you okay?
哦，是的，是的。 Oh, yes, yes.
现在是经典的约翰伯恩第十轮。 Classic John Byrne round of ten now.
你发现绿巨人穿着这套衣服，你知道吗？ You found the Hulk in this outfit, you know?
我惊叹耶稣，你这个愚钝的生物，我想—— I marveled Jesus, you dull creature, and I want to--
不是你。我们只是走不同的方向。 Not you. We're just going in a different direction.
你知道，从后面看，你 You know, from behind, you
看起来有点像亨利——哦，天哪。 look a little bit like Henry-- Oh, my fuck.
骑兵。传说是真的。 The cavalry. The legends are true.
先生，我谨代表全人类说， And may I say, sir, on behalf of all humanity,
这感觉是对的。 this just feels right.
我们会比你更好地对待你 We will treat you so much better than
你刚刚离开的街上的那些混蛋。 those shit-fucks down the street you were just leaving.
不，先生，只要我的宇宙的命运已经—— No, sir, not while the fate of my universe has had--
这个看起来很有希望。 This one looks promising.
你下去吧。 Down you go.
再次。 Again.
我告诉过你，这里不欢迎你。 I told you, you're not welcome here.
任何地方都不欢迎你。 You're not welcome anywhere.
现在滚出我的酒吧。 Now get the fuck out of my bar.
再给我一杯酒我就走了。 Just give me one more drink and then I'll leave.
事实并非如此。 That's not how it works.
现在确实如此。把瓶子留下。 It does now. Leave the bottle.
我认识你吗？小伙子。 do I know you, bub.
不。但我认识你。 Nope. But I know you.
大家都认识我。 Everybody knows me.
我是金刚狼。 I'm the Wolverine.
是的，你需要 Yes, you are, and I'm gonna need you to
现在就跟我来。 come with me right now.
瞧，女士，我没兴趣。 Look, lady, I'm not interested.
真的进入你的袖口-- Really getting into your cuffs--
我为什么要跟你一起去？ Why would I go with you?
因为不幸的是，我需要你。 Because, unfortunately, I need you.
更不幸的是，我的整个世界都需要你。 And even more unfortunately, my entire world needs you.
你们两个要干架还是要打架？ You two gonna fuck or fight?
你要从他那里拿走它吗？ You gonna take that from him?
嗯。 Yep.
我可以告诉你不要靠得太近， I can tell you that sort of don't get too close,
我去这里只会让你心碎。 I'll only break your heart by going here.
但其他每一个金刚狼都会 But every other Wolverine would have
现在真的伤害到我了。 really hurt me by now.
我有点儿像在玩 tic-tac，所以， And I'm sort of on the tic-tac, so,
upsy-dacy，我们开始吧。 upsy-dacy, here we go.
就这样吧，伙计们。 There you go, guys.
哦。 Oh.
有爪子的威士忌鸡巴。 Whiskey dick with the claws.
这在 40 岁以上的狼獾中相当常见。 It's quite common in Wolverines over 40.
你不想要这个。 You don't want this.
你说得对。但我对此表示怀疑。 You're right. I doubt it.
但你不想要这个。 And you don't want this.
除非你想深呼吸 Unless you want to take a deep breath
穿过你的额头， through your fucking forehead,
我建议你再考虑一下。 I suggest you reconsider.
走吧，花生。 Let's go, Peanut.
哦，哦，等会 等会 Oh, oh, hold on, hold on
看这个。 Watch this.
好的。 All right.
这有点……简单。 That's a little... easy.
老天啊。 Good God.
你是一只口渴的小蜜獾，是吗？ Thirsty little honey badger, aren't you?
没关系，继续吧。 It's okay. Keep going.
观众已经习惯了长时间的放映。 Audiences are accustomed to long run times.
我想你必须要做... I guess you'll have to do...
好的。 Okay.
哦。 Ooh.
看看那些睡衣。 Look at those jammies.
这只花了20年时间。 That only took 20 fucking years.
一只凤尾鱼正朝我们游过来。 One anchobain coming right up.
祝你好运，宝贝儿。 On your luck, baby girl.
这个洛根也有同样的...他可以做到 This Logan has the same... he can do
任何东西，甚至是音乐剧。 anything even musicals.
但请注意，他实际上穿着戏服 But, notice, he's actually wearing a costume
就像他不觉得尴尬一样 like he's not embarrassed to be on a
一次超级英雄电影。 superhero movie for once.
我不明白。 I don't understand.
你说我的宇宙正在消亡， You said my universe is dying,
因为这个疯子自己自杀了。 because this sack of nuts got himself killed.
嗯，问题解决了。 Well, problem solved.
我的上帝。 My God.
你真的认为你可以取代 You actually think you can replace an
有这个吗？ anchor being with this?
我不会接受任何其他 I wouldn't have accepted any other
金刚狼节拍配音， Wolverine beat-y-dubs,
但你已经超越了自己，带来了 but you have outdone yourself and brought
我眼中最差的金刚狼。 me the worst Wolverine.
你说的最糟糕的一个是什么意思？ What do you mean the worst one?
休斯顿先生，这个金刚狼辜负了他的整个世界。 Mr. Huston, this Wolverine let down his entire world.
他是一个传奇人物，但这并不是一个好的传奇。 He's the stuff of legend, but not in a good way.
而他所做的……嗯，有些事情是 And what he did... well, some things are
简直无法原谅。 just beyond forgiveness.
好的。我该怎么做呢？ Okay. How do I make this
对吧？我可以做任何事。 right? I can be all do anything.
我给了你成就伟业的机会， I gave you a chance at greatness,
因为我的上司认为你很特殊。 because my superior has deemed you special.
显然没有什么特别之处， Clearly not special in a good way,
但显然你有一些重要的事情 but apparently you have some important
未来的服务宗旨。 future purpose to serve.
和托尔一起，他拥抱着我。 With Thor, he holds me.
但我尽到了我的职责。 But I did my duty.
我给了你成为大人物的机会， I gave you the opportunity to be somebody,
而不是接受我的奉献 and instead of accepting my offering with
人性和感恩， humanity and gratitude,
你打断了我的鼻子。 you broke my nose.
看起来不错。 It looks great.
我用 I decimated dozens of my men with the
假定英雄的尸体，不仅有主权 assumed corpse of a hero, with sovereign not only
他的遗体，但他的记忆。 his remains, but his memory.
互联网，您觉得怎样？ What do you think, Internet?
你的世界正在消亡！ Your world is dying!
非常感谢。 Thank you very much.
并且没有什么可以阻止的。 And there's no stopping it.
你们的人性就是要迅速完成它。 The humanity of you is to make it quick.
蒸发的想法 Is the thought of vaporizing
我的世界让你感到饥饿吗？ my universe making you peckish?
我正在吃我的感情。 I'm eating my feelings.
我即将失去一切 I'm about to lose everything
我所关心的 that I've ever cared about,
因为从下面那个毛茸茸的雷霆阴部 because that hairy thunder cunt from down
阴部下终于死了，他站着 under cunt finally dies, and he's standing
他就在我身后，不是吗？ right behind me, isn't he?
顺便说一句，欢迎来到漫威宇宙。 Welcome to the MCU, by the way.
您的加入正值低谷。 You're joining at a bit of a low point.
至于你，我想和你的老板谈谈。 As for you, I want to talk to your boss.
我要你帮他接电话， I want you to get him on the phone,
你告诉他或她， and you tell him, her, or them that
Marvel H. Christ 没有参加比赛。 Marvel H. Christ isn't playing.
我靠。 Holy shit.
我刚刚听到了屁眼交响曲 I just heard a symphony of buttholes
一下子紧握。 clenching all at once.
您已脱离电网。 You're off-grid.
你的老板不知道你得了什么病 Your bosses don't know what you sick
这里到底发生了什么事。 fucks are doing down here.
好吧，我来告诉你。 Well, I'll tell you what.
我有卡伦黑带，而且我 I have a black belt in Karen, and I'm
要上楼了， going to go upstairs,
我要告诉他们你的一切—— and I'm going to tell them all about you and--
哦，沉默真好。 Oh, silence is nice.
他他妈杀了啥？ What the fuck did he kill?
扔进垃圾堆。 To the trash heap.
你会适应的。 You'll fit right in.
差点 That was close.
。别只是站在那里，你这个猴子。 Don't just stand there, you ape.
拉我一把 Give me a hand up
不，紧急情况下可以。谢谢。 No, emergency okay. Thank you.
我们到底在哪儿？ Where the hell are we?
我不知道。 I don't know.
看起来有点像疯狂的麦克斯。 It looks kind of Mad Maxie.
但这会构成侵犯知识产权，对吗？ But that would be IP infringement, right?
真他妈的笑话。 Fucking jokes.
你到底在听什么？ Are you even listening back there?
我们再也回不到那个 Paradox 先生混蛋身边了。 We don't make it back to that Mr. Paradox asshole.
我认识的每个人都会死。 Everyone I know is going to die.
不，这是我的问题。 No, my fucking problem.
那么，这就是你所得到的全部吗？ Well, is that all you got?
当你的世界变得糟糕的时候你就这么说了吗？ Is that what you said when your world went to shit?
你再说一遍？ Come again?
是的，我听说了你的一切。 Yeah, I heard all about you.
我把一切都搞砸了， I screwed up everything,
你应该感谢我 and you should be thanking me for pulling
把你从那张你拉屎的床上赶出去。 you out of that bed you shit in.
你这个狗杂种，在背后捅刀子吗？ Are you backstabbing son of a bitch?
你现在准备好保持冷静了吗？ Are you ready to be calm now?
安息吧，福克斯。 Rest in peace, fox.
我不想和你打架，小花生。 I don't want to fight you, peanut.
不管你做了什么。 Doesn't matter what you did.
我只是需要你的帮助。 I just need your help.
我他妈不在乎。 I don't fucking care.
这会很痛。 This is gonna hurt.
好吧！ Alright!
去他妈的！ Fuck it!
让我们满足人们的期望。 Let's give the people what they came for.
我们走吧。 Let's fucking go.
拿出你那特别的袜子吧，书呆子们。 Get your special sock out, nerds.
一切都会好起来。 This gonna get good.
[音乐] [Music]
我看看你的头还能再长出来吗！ Let's see you grow your fucking head back!
我能修好它！我能修好它！ I can fix it! I can fix it!
那是什么？不管你做了什么。 It's what? Whatever it is that you did.
无论什么原因让你这么糟糕。 Whatever made you so bad.
那些...那些... Those... those...
怪胎！在 TVA 中你听到过他们说的。 Freaks! In the TVA you heard them.
他们有能力毁灭我的宇宙。 They have the power to end my universe.
但他们同样有能力改变你的宇宙。 But they also have the power to change yours.
我们回到那里。 We get back there.
我们可以修复你的世界。 And we can fix your world.
一起。 Together.
我保证。 I promise.
他们可以修复它。 They can fix it.
嘿！ Hey!
嘿！我们互相争斗，我们输了。 Hey! We fight each other, we lose.
天啊，就是他。 Dear God, it's him.
谁？就是那一个。 Who? The one.
对于莫莉来说，超级英雄相当于安慰食物。 The superhero equivalent to comfort food for Molly.
白人对所有问题的回答 White guy's answer to all the
令人失望和另一位一线明星。 disappointments and another A-lister.
公平警告，华丽。 Fair warning, gorgeous.
你将会遇到一些“美好”的语言。 You're going to encounter some angelic language.
有点玩屁股，但我们已经 A smidge of ass play, but we've been
禁止在镜头前吸食可卡因。 prohibited from using cocaine on camera.
他们来了。 They're coming.
他们是谁？ Who's they?
[引擎轰鸣] [engine revving]
哦，他们开车很愤怒。 Oh, they're driving angry.
这就是超级英雄式落地！ Now that's a superhero landing!
我来对付他们。 I got this.
[引擎轰鸣] [engine revving]
[轮胎尖叫声] [tires screeching]
跟紧。 Stay close.
好好 aye aye
你可以的 You got this.
Cassandra 将成为小猫 Cassandra is going to be kitty when she
看看我们抓到了什么。 sees what we caught.
你不能跑。每个人都知道这一点。 You can't run. Everybody knows that.
你看到有人在跑步吗，迪克·法布雷恩斯？ You see anyone running, Dick Fabrains?
你肯定不会喜欢接下来发生的事情。 You're not going to love what happens next.
噢，天哪。 Oh, oh my God.
啊！天啊，他要说那句话了！ Oink! Oh my God, he's gonna say that
哈！天啊，他要说那句话了！ Ha! Oh my God, he's going to say it!
他要说啥？ Say what?
复仇者联盟！霹雳火！ 等会，啥玩意？ Avengers ！flame up！Sorry, what?
[尖叫] [screaming]
哦！ Oh!
[尖叫] [screaming]
[碰撞] [crash]
我们不认识这个人。 We don't know that guy.
我们认错人了 We thought we did.
我认识你。 I know you.
天哪—— Holy sh--
[引擎轰鸣] [engine revving]
剑齿虎，你的兄弟，准备好赴死！ Sabretooth, your brother, ready to die!
等一下，等一下，等一下，等一下！暂停！ Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! Time!
你看上去很荒唐。 You look ridiculous.
人们已经等待这场战斗几十年了。 People have waited decades for this fight.
这不会是一件容易的事。 It's not going to be easy.
也许不会。 Maybe not.
射击魔鬼，将他打倒。 Shoot the devil, take him down.
控制侧翼，然后把他击倒， Side control, then bowl him out,
并被摔倒，直到他 and be a ground and pound until he makes
没有声音因为他已经死了。 no sound because he's dead.
闭嘴吧。 Shut the fuck up.
我的天啊。 Oh my God.
好的，祝你好运。我是你的超级粉丝。 Okay, good luck. I'm a huge fan.
[引擎轰鸣] [engine revving]
[笑] [laughing]
[咆哮] [growling]
怎么了，姑娘？ What is it, girl?
井那边有问题吗？ Is there trouble at the well?
[碰撞] [crash]
[笑] [laughing]
大麻烦。 Big trouble.
看哪！ Behold!
你们尊贵的女王弗瑞奥萨的头颅！ The head of your precious queen, Furiosa!
我有金刚狼。 I have the Wolverine.
我一个人控制着她。 I alone control her.
你來嗎！ You come for me!
你来找她。 You come for her.
非常抱歉。我知道发音是 him。 So sorry. I know it's pronounced him.
我对性别视而不见。这是我必须承受的痛苦。 I'm genderblind. It's my cross to bear.
谁是下一个？ Who's next?
蛤蟆！ Toad!
你上。 You're up.
[碰撞] [crash]
[咕哝声] [grunting]
哎呀。 Uh-oh.
操 oh fuck
[碰撞] [crash]
嗯。 Uh.
我应该... I should've...
我是雷神。 I'm God of Thunder.
（咕哝声） (grunting)
我什么时候睡着了？ When was I asleep?
你们中并不是所有人都睡着了。 Not all of you was asleep.
别打扰。 Don't bother.
我们没希望了。 We're very thorough.
你知道我们在哪里，开始说话吧。 You know where we are, start talking.
你处于虚空之中。 You're in the void.
把它想象成炼狱。 Think of it as purgatory.
里德称其为形而上学的垃圾场 Reed called it a metaphysical junkyard
任何无用的东西在被消灭之前都会去那里 where anything useless goes before it gets annihilated
永远，时空管理局将人们送往哪里 forever and where the TVA sends people
和多元宇宙的其他部分不太兼容。 that don't play nice with the rest of the multiverse.
比如你？ Like you?
你呢。 And you.
湮灭意味着什么？ What does the annihilating?
左。 A liet.
这东西里有谎言吗？ A liet is in this thing?
出自《洛基》第一季第五集？ From Loki season one episode five?
这里的每个人都在逃避谎言。 Everyone here is on the run from a liet.
噢，别这样。 Oh, don't make it.
但还是存在阻力。 There's a resistance though.
像我们一样设法生存下来的其他人， Other people like us that manage to survive,
他们躲在边境地带 they're hiding out in the border lanes
试图找到一种方法离开这里。 trying to find a way to fuck outta here.
那我们就去那里。 Then that's where we go.
我们？ We?
我们？ Us?
组队？ A team?
答案是肯定的。 The answer is yes.
摆脱。 Shake off.
他妈的！ Fuck!
你把它掐灭了。 You nipped it.
刚刚用你的小牛排刀切了一下。 Just got the tip with your little steak knife.
这些人可以帮助我们重返时空管理局。 These others can help us get back to the TVA.
他们可以解决问题。 They can fix things.
（笑） (laughing)
有什么好笑的吗，鲍勃？ Something funny, Bob?
她也许对此有话要说。 She might have something to say about that.
她是谁？ Who's she?
在虚空中。 In the void.
你要么是她的食物，要么为她工作。 You're either food for a liet or you work for her.
（激昂的音乐） (dramatic music)
哦，好吧，年纪轻轻。 Oh, all right, finely-aged.
噢，你必须喝完你的那壶，否则就没法喝了。 Oh, you must finish your jug or not.
谢谢。 Thank you.
我把你们的声音放下。 I give your voices down.
她不喜欢闲聊。 She don't like the chatter.
她会爱上你的。 She's gonna love you.
（激昂的音乐） (dramatic music)
是孩子吗？ Is it the child?
嘿，嘿，杰克，是我们！ Hey, hey, Jack, it's us!
那不是那個孩子。 That's not the child.
啊，该死。 Ah, shit.
哦，阿贝尔真棒。 Oh, Abel is some great.
这不会得到狼群的善意回应。 That's not gonna go over well with the wolf mob.
一只狼獾。 A wolverine.
我不知道何时才能得到你们中的一个。 I wondered when I'd get one of you.
你是 Xavier 的一员。 You're one of Xavier's.
你认识他吗？你认识查克吗？ You know him, you know Chuck?
噢，我认识他。 Oh, I knew him.
我们共享同一个伤口。 We shared a wound.
试图勒死这个狡猾的小家伙 Tried to strangle the sly little fellow
和我的脐带。 with my umbilical cord.
阿门。 Amen.
我从来就不喜欢室友。 I've never loved roommates.
我的女儿是盲人，但她能看见 Mine's blind, except she could see
可卡因，出于某种原因。 cocaine for some reason.
陛下，您想加入讨论吗？ You wanna chime in, Your Majesty?
我快要死在这里了。 I'm dying here.
你是谁？ Who are you?
查尔斯·泽维尔的双胞胎姐妹，卡桑德拉·诺娃。 Charles Xavier's twin, Cassandra Nova.
哦，该死。肛交是怎么发生的？ Oh, shit. How did it anal birth?
你们两个很可爱。 You two are cute.
我对此有很好的感觉。 I have a good feeling about this.
（雷声隆隆） (thunder rumbling)
我一直想抓这只小萤火虫 And I've been trying to catch this little firefly
好几年了，不是吗，约翰尼？ for years, haven't I, Johnny?
您选择了错误的时间结交新朋友。 You picked the wrong time to make new friends.
哦，约翰尼告诉了我们关于你的一切。 Oh, Johnny told us all about you.
也许现在就闭嘴吧。 Maybe shut up now.
是的，也许不需要——我们刚才还在聊天。 Yeah, maybe don't-- We were just talking here.
是的，约翰尼告诉我们你是个精神病患者， Yeah, Johnny told us you're a psychotic,
自大狂妄的混蛋。 megalomaniacal asshole.
他的话不是我的。 His word's not mine.
地狱之手，痛苦的主宰。 Hell bent, a domination in pain.
你这样说了我。 You said all that about me.
不，不！ No, no!
你怎么了，我就随便说说吧！ How do you, I just say anything!
捡一些石头，约翰尼！ Pick some stones, Johnny!
我会让她吓倒你。 I'll let her intimidate you.
就像你在车队中说的那样。 Like you said in the convoy.
这舔手指，内心死去， This finger-licking, dead inside,
三流廉价商店的坚果奶 pixie slab of third-rate dime store nut milk
可以吃你美味的肉桂圈 can eat your delicious cinnamon ring
并将岩石一直踢到光头端。 and kick rocks all the way to bald-end.
我从来没说过这些话 I have never said any of those words
在我的一生中！我是对的！ in my entire life! I'm right!
这是一种谦虚！ It's a modesty!
人们认为我是个混蛋， People think I'm a shit-topper,
但这家伙，更上一层楼。 but this guy, next level.
什么？ What?
这，我，等等，我甚至不知道是什么 This, I, wait, I don't even know what
那块肉怎么了！ happened to that meat!
先生，我真心向您致敬。 My hat's off to you, sir, truly.
我没有，基思，那是，我，我，我没有——（崩溃） I didn't, Keith, that's, I, I, I don't-- (crashing)
这不是我最喜欢的，克里斯。 Not my favorite, Chris.
你这个愚蠢的混蛋 You stupid piece of shit, you
刚刚把他给杀了！ just got him fucking killed!
嘿，我们都很悲伤！ Hey, we're all grieving!
附言：您知道我要对预算做什么吗？ PS, do you know what I'm gonna do to the budget?
（抽泣） (sniffling)
饿了就撒谎。 A lie at this hungry.
发生了某种错误。 There's been some kind of mistake.
Big Yellow 是替补主播， Big Yellow is a backup anchor being,
我是 Marvel Jesus、MJ 和 Turnasty。 and I'm Marvel Jesus, MJ and Turnasty.
这可能听起来很难受， This may be hard to hear,
但还有另一个英国恶棍。 but there's another British villain.
他会毁灭我的宇宙，我会阻止他。 He's gonna destroy my universe, and I'm gonna stop him.
哦，亲爱的，你真的没有打动我 Oh, honey, you don't really strike me
作为一个拯救世界的人。 as a world-saving type.
我打中他了吗？ Did I hit him off?
我不想事情发展到这个地步。 I didn't want it to come to this.
要么你帮助我们，要么我的朋友 Either you help us, or my friend here
会让整个第二幕音乐沉没，哥们 is gonna sink the entire second act of music, man,
无需任何热身。 with zero warmup.
你从哪儿弄来的椅子？ Where'd you get the chair?
偶尔，我确实会用泥刀穿过这里。 Once in a while, I did get a trowel through here.
不过没关系，不是的。 Nevermind, though, no.
他根本就没想找我。 He didn't care to find me.
啊，天啊，他们正在吹嘘创伤！ Ah, jizzee, they're trauma-bragging!
你不能把它塞进去吗 Can't you just stuff it
把它变成成就 down, turn it into accomplishment
或者像我们其他人一样患上癌症？ or cancer like the rest of us?
但我和你们不一样。 But I'm not like the rest of you.
也许金刚狼除外。 Except maybe the Wolverine.
现在我们在一起真的会令人恐惧。 Now we could be truly terrifying together.
你知道，那很可怕，对吧？ You know, that's scary, huh?
时空管理局确实是这么认为的。 The TVA certainly thought so.
在我学会走路之前，他们就把我送到了这里。 They sent me here before I could walk.
你知道，这是最好的事情 And you know, it's the best thing that
曾经发生在我身上 ever happened to me.
我喜欢这里。 I love it here.
你住在一个垃圾场里。 You live in a garbage dump.
我想我们都知道谁住在垃圾堆里。 I think we both know who lives in the garbage dump.
虚空即是天堂。 The void is a paradise.
我可以毫无羞耻地在这里行使我的权力。 I can wield my power here without shame.
不幸的是，我没有孩子的泽维尔 Unfortunately, I had no child's Xavier
教导我节制。 to teach me temperance.
你的孩子怎么样？ What about your child?
他保护你了吗？ Did he protect you?
他让你感到安全吗？ Did he make you feel safe?
我们具有免疫力，所以我们永远不会安全。 We're immune, so we're never safe.
（尖叫） (screaming)
哇，哇，哇，哇，哇，哇，哇， Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
我不要烟。 I don't want the smoke.
我和你并无矛盾。 I don't have any beef with you.
我只是想救我的朋友。 I just want to save my friends.
我只是，我想回家。 I just, I want to go home.
嗯，事实上我可以送你回家。 Well, the thing is, I could get you home.
好的。 Good.
但我不想。 But I don't want to.
不好。 Not good.
（咕哝声） (grunting)
你想要什么，韦德·威尔逊？ What do you want, Wade Wilson?
呃，你的手指在我体内，但不是以一种好的方式。 Uh, your fingers are inside me, but not in a good way.
我的兄弟可以用叉子进入一个人的思想。 My brother could enter one's mind with a fork.
我必须亲自动手。 I have to get my hands dirty.
哦，天哪。 Oh, gosh.
我抓到你了。 I've got you.
（激昂的音乐） (dramatic music)
我不能，我不能，你不在这里。 I can't, I can't, you're not here.
我在这儿。 I'm right here.
不，你不是，我不能。 No, you're not, I can't.
我在这儿。 I'm right here.
然后告诉我你必须要做些什么。 Then show me you gotta do something.
给你看个东西？ Show you what?
让我知道你关心比你更伟大的事物。 Show me you care about something bigger than you.
自从他们拒绝你之后，你就屈服了。 Ever since they turned you down, you took a knee.
宝贝，你再也没有站起来。 Baby, you never got back up.
我知道你正在经历一些事情。 I know you're going through something.
让我和你一起经历一下。 Let me go through it with you.
你疯了，马克斯，你没有疯。 You're crazy, Max, you're not crazy.
你去哪儿了？ Where'd you go?
我的天啊。 Oh my God.
你就直说吧，可以吗？ You just say it, okay?
说“我不要你，我不想和你在一起。” Say, "I don't want you, I don't want to be with you."
来吧，说吧，说吧，说吧，说吧。 Go ahead, say it, say it, say it, say it.
你不想和我在一起。 You don't want to be with me.
如果你告诉我那件事我就会走开。 Tell me that and I'll walk away.
说“我不要你”。 Say, "I don't want you."
（忧郁的音乐） (somber music)
你永远不会被重视。 You'll never fucking matter.
什么？ What?
你永远不会被重视。 You'll never fucking matter.
什么？ What?
她从来没有说过那句话。 She never said that.
不，但我敢打赌她是这么想的。 No, but I bet she thought it.
我想看看。 I wanna look.
你太刻薄了。 You are so mean.
我的大脑可以尝到你的手指 My brain could taste your fingers
它们的味道就像仇恨。 and they tasted like hate.
我们以上帝的名义担任亲密关系协调员。 And we're in God's name as the intimacy coordinator.
您太迷失了，威尔逊先生。 You're so lost, Mr. Wilson.
你来这里多久了？ How long before you came here?
小刀夫人，她现在要操你的脸了。 Mrs. Baby Knife, she's gonna fuck you in the face now.
如果你想杀我，就得 If you want to kill me, it's going to take
不止一点点。 more than a little bit.
那么性生活怎么样？ How about sex?
（枪声） (gun fires)
（男子笑道） (man laughs)
啊，我的孩子，又敏捷又强壮。 Ah, my boy, quick and strong.
那是我的大孩子，但你也是。 That's my big boy, yet you are.
（笑） (laughs)
（枪声） (gun fires)
嗯，这很有趣， Well, this has been fun,
但是大个子需要吃饭，而且房租也得付。 but the big guy needs to eat and the rent is due.
（引擎转速） (engine revs)
顺便说一句，你就是租金。 By the way, you're the rent.
（引擎转速） (engine revs)
（引擎转速）（枪声） (engine revs) (gun fires)
（引擎转速） (engine revs)
（发动机转速）（轮胎尖叫声） (engine revs) (tires screech)
（枪声） (gun fires)
来还是怎的？ Coming or what?
未来！ Coming!
（引擎转速） (engine revs)
（男人咕哝） (man grunts)
你在想什么，瓦尔？ What you thinking, Val?
滚开！ Get the fuck off of me.
嘘，嘘。 Shh, shh.
我受够了。 I was done.
谁做了什么？ Who was done what?
把我的刀从你的臀部拿出来。 Getting my knife out of your buttocks.
啊，操！ Ah, fuck!
去吧，别再想我的事了。 Go, get your mind out of my pants.
我正在告诉布莱克。 I'm telling Blake.
新规则。 New rules.
我现在说话。 I talk now.
这对观众来说会非常困难。 That's gonna be very hard on the audience.
闭嘴！ Shut the fuck up!
让我好好想想。 Let me fucking think.
我们必须回到悖论，对吗？ We gotta get back to paradox, right?
正确的？ Right?
这是借口。 It's an excuse.
我现在可以说话吗？或者——点点头，混蛋。 Am I allowed to speak now or-- Just nod, asshole.
正确的。 Right.
然后我们找到其他人。 Then we find the others.
约翰尼谈论的那个可怜的孩子 That poor kid Johnny was talking about
在他被杀之前。 before you got him killed.
哦，我们的孩子，他大概 50 岁了。 Oh, our kid, he's like 50.
如果他们有机会知道如何离开这里， If there's a chance they know how to get out of here,
我们找到他，让那些 TVA 混蛋 we find him and make those TVA fuckers
就像你承诺的那样解决我的问题。 fix my shit like you fucking promised.
我闻到了探索的气息。 I smell Quest.
我闻到食物的香味。 I smell food.
那么是什么促使您最终穿上 Anastagat 服装呢？ So what made you finally wear an Anastagat costume?
找到面包，这样他们就看不到任何流血。 Find bread so they can't see any bleed.
但我知道黄色也很有用。 But I can see how yellow would be useful too.
您检查过是否患有注意力缺陷多动障碍 (ADHD) 吗？ Have you been checked for ADHD?
嗯嗯。 Mm-mm.
但我得过几种性病， But I've had several STDs,
这可能是由注意力缺陷多动障碍 (ADHD) 引起的。 which were probably caused by ADHD.
你要买什么？ What are you looking for?
哦，操，操。 Oh, fuck. Fuck.
不，不，不，不，不，不，不。 No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
那可能是酒精。 That's probably alcohol.
你不想喝吗？ You don't wanna drink up?
是啊，就这样。 Yeah, there you go.
操那个肝脏。 Fuck that liver.
好的。 Okay.
这些到底是什么鬼？ What the fuck are those?
哦。 Oh.
回到平民生活，我戴上假发， Back in civilian life, I wear a toupee,
但没人知道。 but nobody knows.
（笑）大家都知道。 (laughs) Everybody knows.
想谈谈困扰你的事吗 Wanna talk about what's haunting you
或者我们应该等待第三幕的闪回？ or should we wait for a third act flashback?
去你丫的。 Go fuck yourself.
你知道， You know,
我的世界，你很受尊敬。 my world, you're well regarded.
是的，但是不在我的范围内。 Yeah, well, not in mine.
他们也不太喜欢我这么做。 They don't like me much in mine either.
你不說。 You don't say.
我希望它能有所作为。 I want it to be something.
你知道，我真希望它是一部《复仇者联盟》。 You know, I've, shit, I want it to be an Avenger.
操复仇者联盟。 Fuck the Avengers.
你知道，我却没能成功。 You know, I didn't make the cut though.
X战警也一样。 Same with the X-Men.
我的女朋友就这样离开了我。 My girlfriend left me like this.
你放過女朋友嗎？ Did you let a girlfriend?
是的。 Yeah.
当我们遇到瓦妮莎时，她是一名舞蹈演员。 Vanessa, when we met, she was a dancer.
我的意思是，她的一生都很美好。 I mean, her whole life was good.
但天啊，我只是， But oh boy, I just,
把它搞砸了。 fuck that right up.
但是你，你是X战警。 But you, you were an X-Men.
去他妈的，你就是X战警。 Fuck that, you were the X-Men.
金刚狼。 The Wolverine.
金刚狼？ The Wolverine?
他是那个世界的英雄。 He's a hero in that world.
是啊，他心里确实有些想法。 Yeah, well, he had shit in mind.
你说洛根是英雄，发生了什么？ You said Logan was a hero, what happened?
他死了。 He died.
哦。 Oh.
嗯，严格来说，你的胸部被一棵树操了， Well, technically you were chest fucked by a tree,
但实际上他只是没电了 but really he just ran out of batteries
试图拯救某人。 trying to save someone.
WHO？ Who?
在实验室里培育出来的高跟鞋叫她X-23。 The shit heels that grew in a lab called her X-23.
但她只是个孩子。 But she was just a kid.
一个更年轻、更娇小、但又更为凶狠的你。 A younger, daintier, somehow meaner version of you.
他为了救她而死。 He died trying to save her.
它过去挺美。 It was beautiful.
听着，美穗，我知道你受伤了。 Look, Miho, I know you're hurt.
我的室友是一位年长的盲人非裔美国人， My blind, elderly African-American roommate,
盲人艾尔总是说，痛苦让我们知道我们是谁。 Blind Al, always says that pain teaches us who we are.
有时我们需要倾听那份痛苦 Sometimes we need to listen to that pain
而不是逃避它。 instead of running from it.
我靠。 Holy shit.
是的，她很聪明。 Yeah, she's wise.
不，不，这是她的名字，你可以叫她盲人艾尔。 No, no, that's her name, you call her Blind Al.
嗯，她是盲人。 Well, she's blind.
（欢快的音乐） (upbeat music)
我从未见过你今晚如此美丽 I've never seen you look as lovely as you did tonight
我从未见过你如此耀眼 I've never seen you shine so bright
红夫人 Lady of red
只和我一起跳舞 Just dancing with me
她做了你 She did you
这里没人 There's nobody here
看着你。 Look at you.
她和我们一起去。 She's coming with us.
不，她不是。 No, she's not.
噢，是的。 Oh, yes, she is.
不好了。 Oh, no.
哦，是的。抱歉。 Oh, yes. Sorry.
对于那个很抱歉。 Sorry about that.
过来吧，姑娘。 Come here, girl.
你是谁？ Who are you?
我是死侍。 I'm Deadpool.
我猜你也是死侍。 And I guess you're Deadpool too.
但在这里，每个人都叫我 Vicepool。 But in here, everybody calls me Vicepool.
天哪，你在哪里看到了 Ladypool？ Oh my goodness, where do you see Ladypool?
她是美丽的。 She is gorgeous.
她也刚刚生了孩子，我却看不出来。 She just had a baby too, and I can't even tell.
我认为你不应该这么说。 I don't think you're supposed to say that.
没关系。 That's okay.
我认为自己是一名女权主义者，对吗？ I identify as a feminist, right?
那些是镀金的，50口径 Are those gold-plated, 50 caliber
沙漠之鹰枪手？ desert eagle pistoleros?
当然。 Of course.
与我的耳朵相配。 To match my ear huggy.
我可以拥有她吗？ Can I have her?
（笑）除非从我尸体上跨过去。 (laughs) Over my dead body.
你真有趣。 You're fun.
我想你已经见过玛丽·帕芬了。 And I guess you've already met Mary Puffin.
其别名是 Dogpool。 It's AKA Dogpool.
因此，你出手，她90%是G-Spy， Therefore, you put your hand, she's 90% G-Spy,
她会让你知道的。 and she'll let you know it.
你让这个小调情者 You let this little flirt out of your
视线一秒钟 sight for one second
她开始为新爸爸寻找东西。 and she starts shopping for a new papa.
如果你不能成为一个负责任的恋童癖者， If you can't be a responsible pedo,
那么也许你不配拥有这只小独角兽。 then maybe you don't deserve this little unicorn.
法官大人，所有罪名成立。 Guilty on all charges, your honor.
她不能再发生这样的事了。 She can't happen again.
你为什么这么好？ Why are you so nice?
善良是不需要付出任何代价的。 It costs nothing to be kind.
闭嘴也是免费的。 Shutting the fuck up is also free.
明白了，不是吗？ Got it, isn't it?
这是洛根。 This is Logan.
他通常赤裸上身，但他放飞自我 He's usually shirtless, but he's let himself go
自从离婚以来。 since the divorce.
她的面具在哪儿？ Where's her mask?
拜托了伙计们。 Come on, guys.
噢，这家伙。 Oh, this guy.
我们正在寻找一群幸存者。 We're looking for a group of survivors.
噢，他们在那儿。 Oh, they're out there.
是的。 Yeah.
但默克对默克，你最好祈祷你别跑 But Merk to Merk, you better hope that you don't run
进入死侍核心。 into the Deadpool core.
是的，他们疯了。 Yeah, they're crazy.
他们会把你砍成碎片 They will chop you up into a thousand pieces
并将你隐藏于虚空中。 and hide you all over the void.
如果他们能处理好童年创伤， If they could only process their childhood trauma,
他们将踏上一段艰难的康复之旅。 they'd go on one heck of a healing journey.
看，我们正前往边境地区。 Look, we're headed for the Borderlands.
你知道它在哪儿吗？ You know where it is?
无主之地，是的，点击了 12 次。 Borderlands, yeah, that's 12 clicks.
杜韦斯特，如果你愿意的话，我可以借你一程。 Do West, I can lend you my ride if you like it.
这是我的荣幸。 It would be my honor.
（汽车引擎轰鸣） (car engine revving)
哦，不，不，不，不，不，不，绝对不是。 Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, absolutely not.
嗯嗯，啥事？ Uh-uh, what the?
不，不。 No, no.
快上车。 Jettish get in the car.
这不是汽车。 This isn't a car.
这根本就是一辆本田奥德赛。 This is a Honda fucking Odyssey.
油门响应太差了。 Throttle response sucks a cock.
过时的信息娱乐系统。 Dated infotainment system.
当本田看到未经治疗的衣原体感染 When Honda saw that untreated chlamydia
正在卷土重来，他们发明了本田奥德赛 was making a comeback, they invented the Honda Odyssey
竞争。 to compete.
上车。 Get in the fucking car.
他会把你安全送达那里。 He'll get you there safe and sound.
噢，贝琪总是这样。 Oh, Betsy always does.
但你得还给他还一只狗。 You're gonna have to give him a dog back though.
我知道，听着。 I know, listen.
是啊，是个孩子。 Yeah, it's child.
如果你想放弃她， If you ever wanna give her up,
或者她需要一个新家， or if she needs a new home,
或者如果你发生了什么事， or if something should happen to you,
我很乐意成为她的爸爸。 I'd love to be her papa.
哦，无论我发生了什么事。 Oh, whatever happened to me.
很多东西。 Lots of stuff.
不，我们要逃跑。 No, we're running away.
别这样，玉米太密了，姑娘。 Don't, the corn was too dense, girl.
混蛋，不。 Fuckers, no.
（车门关上） (car door slams)
不要带我回家 Don't take me home
这真是普通的冰 It's the damn common ice
这对你的爱来说是正确的 It's right for your love
今生 This life
我想牵着我的手 I want to take me by hand
带我去一个新的地方 Take me somewhere new
我不知道你是谁 I don't know who you are
但是我 But I
我和你在一起 I'm with you
好的，我只是想问问。 Okay, I'm just gonna ask it.
这套西装是怎么回事？ What's with the suit?
当我失去理智时，我做的第一件事就是拿起刀。 First thing I did when I flamed out, I took my knife.
算了吧。 Drop it.
它没那么丑。 It's not that ugly.
别再谈论我自己了。 Stop talking about myself.
你自己做的嗎？ Did you make it yourself?
到过那里。 Been there.
现在退出。 Quit now.
X战警让你戴上它吗？ The X-Men make you wear it?
这帮狗杂种。 Those sons of fucking bitches.
他们不是你的朋友，我告诉你吧。 They are not your friends, I'll tell you that.
朋友不会让朋友离开家 Friends don't let friends leave the house
看起来他们正在为洛杉矶公羊队打击犯罪。 looking like they fight crime for the Los Angeles Rams.
别再提这件事了。 Shut the fuck up about this.
哇，哇，哇，哇，哇。 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
注意你的皱眉纹，天使宝宝。 Watch your frown lines, angel baby.
我只是想建立一点联系。 I'm just trying to bond a little bit.
嗯，那我们聊点别的吧。 Yeah, well then talk about something else.
美好的。 Fine.
（鸟鸣声） (birds chirping)
停止。 Stop.
他们可以修复你的世界。 They can fix your world.
你要做的第一件事是什么 What's the first thing you're gonna do
你什么时候离开这里？ when you get out of here?
一些外用酒精？ Some rubbing alcohol shots?
也许是雨刮液追踪器？ Maybe a wiper fluid chaser?
你说什么？ What did you say?
所以当你回来的时候， So when you get back,
你要做的第一件事是什么？ what's the first thing you're gonna do?
不，不，不，在那之前。 No, no, no, before that.
是的，他们可以修复你的世界吗？ Yep, they can fix your world?
（关门声） (door slams)
（人群咆哮） (crowd roars)
如果我的意思是——你骗了我，那你是什么意思？ What do you mean if I mean-- You lied to me.
我他妈知道他们能不能帮我解决问题， I have a fucking clue if they can help me fix things,
你？ do you?
不，我的意思是——不，操！ No, I mean-- No, fuck!
他妈的！ Fuck!
我沒有撒谎。 I didn't lie.
你撒谎。 You lied.
不，我许下了一个有根据的愿望。 No, I made an educated wish.
因为我需要你。 Because I need you.
这，这就是原因。 This, this is why.
就在这儿。 Right here.
因为如果我们不采取行动，他们就会死。 Because if we don't do something, they die.
我对拯救世界一无所知。 I don't know anything about saving worlds.
我为何要关心？ Why would I even care?
因为我的整个世界就在这张照片里。 Because my entire world is right here in this picture.
只有九个人， It's only nine people,
而我却不知道该如何独自拯救它。 and I have no idea how to save it alone.
我知道如何为了钱搞砸别人， I know how to fuck people up for money,
但你，你，知道如何拯救他们。 but you, you, know how to save them.
另一个金刚狼做了什么？ What's the other Wolverine did?
（关门声）哦，操！ (door slams) Oh, fuck!
我想我被困在最糟糕的情况里了。 I guess I'm stuck with the worst one.
你说你许下了一个有根据的愿望？ Did you say you made an educated fucking wish?
他们叫我“嘴巴灵敏的雇佣兵”。 They call me the Merc with the Mouth.
他们不叫我诚实的蒂米， They don't call me Truthful Timmy,
萨斯卡通的口交女王。 the blowjob queen of Saskatoon.
（关门声） (door slams)
（咕哝声） (grunts)
多一个。 One more.
请给我一个。 Please give me one.
Goober 教程。 Goober tutorial.
（尖叫） (screams)
你知道吗，你真是一个笑话。 You know what, you're a fucking joke.
难怪复仇者联盟没有选你。 No wonder the Avengers didn't take you.
或者 X-Men，他们会说操任何人。 Or the X-Men, they'll say fuck them anyone.
我的意思是，你是一个可笑的、不成熟的、愚蠢的白痴。 I mean, you are a ridiculous, immature, half-wit moron.
我从未见过比他更悲伤、更渴望关注、 I have never met a sadder, more attention-starved,
我一生中遇到过的最讨厌的喋喋不休的小混蛋。 jabbering little prick in my entire life.
这说明了很多，因为我一直活着 And that says a lot, because I've been alive
已经超过200年了。 for more than 200 fucking years.
我告诉你，那个球 I'll tell ya, that ball
小鸡有一件事是对的。 chick was right about one thing.
你永远无法拯救世界。 You will never save the world.
你甚至无法挽救一段感情 You couldn't even save a relationship
和一个该死的脱衣舞娘。 with a goddamn stripper.
混蛋，我真希望你能孤独地死去， Motherfucker, I wish I could say you'd die alone,
但上帝开的一个最棒的玩笑就是你不会死， but it's one of God's best jokes that you can't die,
但这是我们所有人的责任。 except that's on all of us.
（喘气） (panting)
你没什么可说的吗，嘴巴？ You got nothing to say, mouth?
我现在要和你战斗。 I'm gonna fight you now.
好家伙。 Oh, boy.
（咕哝声） (grunts)
（尖叫） (screams)
你好吗？ How are you?
现在赶紧后退。 Back off, now, hurry.
（咕哝声） (grunts)
我很脏，贱人！ I'm dirty, bitch!
（咕哝声） (grunts)
（尖叫） (screams)
（咕哝声） (grunts)
（尖叫） (screams)
不不不。 No, no, no.
（尖叫） (screams)
（咕哝声） (grunts)
好的。 Nice.
我收回我说的话，本田奥德赛太差劲了。 I take it all back, the Honda Odyssey fucks hard.
可惜你没有针扎鸡巴。 Too bad you don't needle dick.
噢，我们才刚刚开始，巴巴。 Oh, we're just getting started, bubba.
（尖叫） (screams)
（激昂的音乐） (dramatic music)
（引擎转速） (engine revs)
雷神！ Thor!
我们在哪里？ Where are we?
不知道，但我喜欢这里。 No clue, but I like it here.
（尖叫） (screams)
（激昂的音乐） (dramatic music)
（引擎转速） (engine revs)
（激昂的音乐） (dramatic music)
（尖叫声）（戏剧性音乐） (screams) (dramatic music)
好，瞧瞧你们。 Okay, look at you all.
你们肯定就是其他人。 You must be the others.
了不起。 Terrific.
让我再提醒一下，你是—— So just to refresh, you are one--
选举人。选举人，是的。 Elector. Elector, yes.
谁又能忘记呢？ Who could forget?
我没想到会在这里见到你， And you, I was not expecting to see you here,
但你知道，你已经退休了。 but you were, you know, retired.
退休。 Retired.
我已经在虚空之中。 I'm already in the void.
我不想再次被取消。 I'm not trying to get canceled again.
我不喜欢你。 I don't like you.
你从来没这样做过。 You never did.
这棵多汁植物是谁 And who's this succulent
提醒我自己的不足之处？ reminder of my own inadequacies?
看着你。 Look at you.
你看起来像超级英雄版的鹰眼。 You look like the superhero version of Hawkeye.
名字叫Remy Labo。 The name's Remy Labo.
你竟敢让我知道， You dare have let me know,
但你可以叫我色域。 but you can call me the gamut.
我已经有一段时间没看过《Sling Blade》了 It's been a while since I've seen Sling Blade
再打我一次。 hit me again.
他们称我为色域。 They call me the gamut.
是吗？ Do they?
你确定你不是真的， Are you sure you didn't just really,
真的希望他们这样做，但结果却并非如此？ really want them to, but it never quite worked out?
他们也一样。 So would they.
你知道，我们这里从来没有金刚狼。 You know, we never had a Wolverine up in here.
但我现在可以告诉你，这只是一个 But I can tell you now, it's just a
询问是基本礼节 common courtesy to ask
在你喝完我的酒之前。 before you drink up all of my liquor.
幸好我不在乎。 That's a good thing I don't give a fuck.
（笑） (chuckles)
（用外语说） (speaking in foreign language)
（玻璃破碎） (glass shattering)
好尴尬。 So embarrassing.
好了，既然已经解决了，看，我们走了很长一段路 Well, now that that's settled, look, we came a long
找到你们三个的方法。 way to find you three.
我们有四个人。 There's four of us.
有四个吗？ There's four?
等等，这是万磁王吗？ Wait, is it Magneto?
亲爱的天父，愿万磁王成为他， Dear sweet God in heaven, let it be Magneto,
因为和他在一起，操！ because with him, fuck!
他死了。 He's dead.
现在迪士尼便宜了吗？ Now Disney gets cheap?
就像匹诺曹把他的脸塞进我的屁股一样 It's like Pinocchio jammed his face in my ass
并开始疯狂撒谎。 and started lying like crazy.
（用外语说） (speaking in foreign language)
一句话也不说，你到底做了什么？ Not a single word, what do you do exactly?
给扑克牌充电。 Charge the playing cards.
让它们轰隆隆。 Make them go boom.
你的力量结束了那个魔法，这很好。 Your powers close that magic, that's good.
我们还没有完全陷入困境。 We're not totally fucked at all.
那么是谁带我们来到这里？ So who brought us here?
那就是我。 That would be me.
（忧郁的音乐） (somber music)
别让我后悔。 Don't make me regret it.
天哪，洛根，这就是她，那是前 23 岁。 Holy shit, Logan, that's her, that's ex-23.
她就是他们跟你提过的那个人。 She's the one they told you about.
你们是怎么被困在虚空中的？ How did you all get stuck in the void?
有人敲门， There was a knock at the door,
TVA 派我来这里。 TVA sent me here.
我也是。 Me too.
也许我出生在这里，所以很难确定。 Maybe I was born here, so it's hard to know for sure.
TVA 认为我们的宇宙正在消亡， TVA decided our universe was dying,
我甚至没有机会去争取它。 and I never even got a chance to fight for it.
像我们这样的人不会悄无声息地离开。 People like us don't go quietly.
田纳西河流域管理局知道这一点，所以他们把我们撤走了。 TVA knows that, so they took us out.
答案是肯定的，我参加。 The answer is yes, I'm in.
在哪方面？ In what?
一个团队。 A team.
我，你，你和我，我们大家在一起。 Me, you, you and me, all of us together.
我们赶紧离开这个地方吧。 Let's get the fuck out of this place.
哦，听着，别离开这条他妈的线。 Oh, listen, don't leave the fucking line.
这是一个有根据的愿望！ It was an educated wish!
啊，看。 Ah, look.
我们已经进入了卡桑德拉的巢穴。 We've been inside Cassandra's lair.
摆脱虚空的唯一方法就是通过她。 The only way out of the void is through her.
她可以送我们回家。 She can get us home.
她告诉我们的。 She told us.
等一下，你进去了吗？ Wait a minute, you've been inside?
你还活着吗？ And you made it out alive?
废话。 Bullshit.
从来没有人这样做过。 Nobody's ever done that.
我们做到了。 We did.
每次我们中有人和她对抗， Every time one of us is going up against her,
他们死。 they die.
惩罚者、快银、夜魔侠。 The Punisher, the Quicksilver, the Daredevil.
夜魔侠，我很抱歉。 Daredevil, I'm so sorry.
没关系。 It's fine.
好的。 Okay.
即使是那个可爱的小天使约翰尼·斯通， Even that sweet baby angel, Johnny Stone,
两天前他就失踪了？ he up and going missing like, what, two days ago?
啊，太伤心了。 Ah, that's so sad.
我相信，无论这位 Johnny-keller 身在何处，他都会蒸蒸日上。 Wherever this Johnny-keller is, I'm sure he's thriving.
瞧，人多力量大，好吗？ Look, there's strength in numbers, all right?
我们，加上你们，我们可以把卡桑德拉放在我们的膝盖上 Us, plus you guys, we can put Cassandra over our knee
并迫使她让我们脱离虚空。 and force her to let us out of the void.
我知道自我怀疑意味着什么。 I know what it means to feel self-doubt.
我完全没有这种感觉。 I don't feel that at all.
我很好。 I'm good.
现在我把你的肠子弄得像可乐胶带一样管用。 Now I get your gut like a coke duct tape work.
就像你就在我灵魂的中心。 It's like you're in the middle of my soul.
你们也许没能拯救你们的宇宙， You guys may not have been able to save your universes,
但你可以为他们报仇。 but you can avenge them.
这正是约翰尼想要的。 It's what Johnny would have wanted.
等等，你认识约翰尼吗？ Wait, you knew Johnny?
哦耶。 Oh yeah.
挖个头来，和他谈谈，然后我们就组队。 Dig head here, talk to him, and we'll team up.
当约翰尼带着一小盒尸体下来的时候。 When Johnny came down with a little case of the dead.
不，不，不，不，我们不知道。 No, no, no, no, we don't know that.
这只是皮肉伤。 It was just a flesh wound.
他也许还幸存了下来。 He may have survived.
如果他幸存下来，他正在为死亡祈祷。 If he survived that, he is praying for death.
谢谢你，金刚狼博士。 Thank you, Dr. Wolverine.
真的？ Really?
你对强尼做了什么？ What you do to Johnny, huh?
跟他谈谈，我会阻止你的。 Talk to him, I'm gonna stop you.
好吧，好吧，嘿，嘿。 Okay, okay, hey, hey, hey.
好吧，他冲着卡桑德拉的坏话漱口， Okay, he rinsed badass mouth about Cassandra,
她用拉链拍打他的皮肤， and she zips-zapped his skin,
让他的器官在地下粗糙地飞溅 leaving his organs to splash crudely under the ground
泥土贪婪地吸着他的血。 while the soil greedily drank his blood.
太可怕了。 It was horrible.
他就像我的兄弟。 He was like a brother to me.
瞧，他还没来得及改变就死了， Look, he died before he could make a difference,
但也许你无法拯救你的世界， but maybe you couldn't save your world,
但耶稣基督，你可以救我的。 but Jesus Christ, you could save mine.
我根本不在乎你的世界， I don't give a shit about your world,
但如果这两个人从他们的生活中走出来， but if these two made it out of their life,
也许我们可以一起回去把她干掉。 maybe together, we could get back in and take her down.
它从哪里来的？ Where'd it come from?
我们称之为自杀，谢尔。 We call that suicide, Sher.
如果我们能阻止她的精神力量， If we can block her psychic powers,
我们可以助你一臂之力。 we can get a leg up.
我知道。 I know it.
我知道万磁王死了， Now, I know Magneto's dead,
但我冒昧地猜测，他的头盔 but I venture to guess that his helmet
躺在她的肚子周围。 is lying around her stomach.
卡桑德拉熔化了一顶头盔。 Cassandra melted a helmet.
她是怎么杀死他们的？ How did she kill them?
她不相信。 She don't believe.
她知道戴头盔是唯一的办法 She knows that helmet was the only way
保护任何人免受她的权力。 to protect anyone from her powers.
唯一一个结实的头盔是Juggernauts， The only other helmet that's strong is Juggernauts,
但他为卡桑德拉工作。 but he works for Cassandra.
Juggernauts头盔，就是这样。 Juggernauts helmet, that's it.
我们不知道它不会脱落。 And we don't be knowing that it ain't coming off.
我要把它拿出来。 I'm gonna come out with it.
我很抱歉，美女，这怎么可能是温和的？ I'm so sorry, beautiful, how could this be gentle?
你的方言教练是谁？ Who is your dialect coach?
小黄人？ The minions?
我觉得我们错过了这里的批判性阐述。 I feel like we're missing critical exposition here.
我受够了这种狗屎。 I'm sick of this shit.
我讨厌躲起来。 I'm sick of hiding.
让我们面对现实吧，我们的世界已经忘记了我们。 Let's face it, our world's forgot about us.
每个人都不了解我们。 Everyone never learned about us.
我们曾经是英雄。 The heroes we were.
我们挽救或想要挽救的生命。 Lives we saved or wanted to save.
也许这两个机会， Maybe these two are a chance,
（咯咯地笑） (gurgling)
以我们应得的方式被铭记。 to be remembered the way we deserve.
对。 Yes.
遗产。 Legacy.
是的，是的，让这个人做饭。 Yes, yes, let this man cook.
这就是我所说的。 This is what I'm talking about.
大慢动作，打悲伤的音乐， Big slow motion, fight sad music,
大家一起工作。 everybody working together.
谁知道你是生是死，诸如此类的事情。 Who knows if you live or die, that sort of thing.
谁准备好了？ Who's ready?
我生来就准备好了。 I was born ready.
是的，该死的。 Yes, damn it.
我不认识我爸爸，但我肯定我开枪了 I ain't know my daddy, but I'm sure I shot
从他的鸡巴准备好了。 out of his dick ready.
耶稣基督，这是图形。 Jesus Christ, that is graphic.
是的，他很随意，但他知道我妈妈的一切 Yeah, he was random, but he knows all about my mama
我朝那里开枪，然后说：“怎么了，医生？” and I shot out there and I said, "What's up, doc?"
约翰尼想要爱你。 Johnny wants to love you.
X-23，会是什么？ X-23, what's it gonna be?
我叫劳拉。 The name's Laura.
我们他妈的走吧。 Let's fucking go.
所以，让我们踢它走吧。 So, let's kick it and go.
是的，我们正在这样做。 Yeah, we're doing this.
你们都他妈的死了。 You're all fucking dead.
天哪，看看房间。 My god, read the room.
我不是在找公司。 I'm not looking for company.
离开这里。 Get out of here.
你让我想起了一个愤怒的醉汉名字。 You remind me of an angry drunk name.
听起来是个很棒的家伙。 Sounds like a great guy.
它还没有完成。 It wasn't finished.
在最重要的时候出现。 Showed up when it mattered the most.
没办法。 Couldn't help it.
你可能不知道，但你是个好人，洛根。 You might not know it, but you're a good man, Logan.
你可能不知道，但显然我是最糟糕的， You might not know it, but apparently I'm the worst,
洛根。 Logan.
因为你，我才有了生活。 I got to have a life because of you.
因为你，我长大了。 I got to grow up because of you.
很多孩子都这么做了。 A lot of kids did.
很多孩子因为我而没有长大。 A lot of kids didn't grow up because of me.
相信我，孩子，我不是英雄。 Trust me, kid, I'm no hero.
那套西装说不一样。 That suit says different.
是啊，你喜欢什么？ Yeah, what do you like it?
你喜欢什么？ What do you like it?
斯科特过去常常求我戴上它。 Scott used to beg me to wear it.
吉恩、风暴、野兽也是如此。 So did Gene, Storm, Beast.
他们所有人。 All of them.
想让我成为团队的一员。 Wanted me to be part of the team.
告诉他们他们看起来都很可笑。 Told them they all looked fucking ridiculous.
我不能让他们以为我想去那里。 I couldn't have them thinking I wanted to be there.
然后有一天，当我独自外出时， And then one day, while I was off on my own,
人类来了。 the humans came.
然后去猎杀变种人。 And went mutant hunting.
我能猜到其余的。 I can guess the rest.
不，不，让我来。 No, no, let me.
让我说。 Let me say it.
我必须说出来。 I need to say it.
当我在酒吧里偶然发现一张狗屎脸时， By the time I stumbled on shit face from the bar,
太晚了。 it was too late.
它死了，每一个。。。 It was dead, every...
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
这套衣服让我想起了他们是谁。 This suit's all I got to remind me of who they were.
以及我所做的。 And what I did.
我们要去索姆的卡桑德拉家。 We're headed to Cassandra's at Sohm.
在我的战斗中玩得开心。 Have fun in my fight.
没有你，我们不会成功的。 We won't pull this off without you.
嘿，不管你以为我是谁，你找错人了。 Hey, whoever you think I am, you got the wrong guy.
你总是错的人。 You were always the wrong guy.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
什么？ What?
埃利亚斯没有得到他们。 Elias didn't get them.
Sonner想先自己玩。 Sonner wanted to play with them herself first.
他们逃走了。 They got away.
他们找到其他人了吗？ Did they find the others?
不 No.
很好，好吧，你这个傻瓜。 Good, all right, you fool.
其他人找到了他们。 The others found them.
哦，非常可爱，做得好，派罗。 Oh, very cute, well done, Pyro.
经典的婴儿嗖嗖声，你真的把我带到了那里。 Classic baby swish, you really got me there.
放松。 Relax.
他们来找诺瓦，她会处理的。 They come after Nova, she'll handle it.
卡桑德拉是个疯狂的外卡。 Cassandra is a lunatic wild card.
你认为我们为什么把她放在那里？ Why do you think we put her there in the first place?
我听说她从未选择离开这片空白。 I'm told she's never chosen to leave the void.
时间河距离完工还有几个小时。 The time river is hours away from completion.
我不能冒任何风险。 I can't take any chances.
也许不是，但我可以。 Maybe not, but I can.
为了一个价格。 For a price.
你为什么要这么说，那个愚蠢的声音？ Why do you have to say it, that silly voice?
太恶心了。 It's so icky.
你到底想不想做？ You want it done or not?
好吧，你的价格，带她出去。 All right, your price, take her out.
突变体。 Mutants.
求爱！ Woo!
带他们出来，带他们出来 Bring them out, bring them out
当你嘴里有坏铁轨时，很难大喊大叫 It's hard to yell when the bad rails in your mouth
快点 Come on
带他们出来，带他们出来 Bring them out, bring them out
嘿，带他们出来，带他们出去 Hey Bring them out, bring them out
是啊，如果你继续直播，我会很高兴的 Yeah, if you keep coming live, I'm gonna be happy
听说夜灯亮了，是不是两者都有 Heard the night light go bright, would that be both
宝贝，保持温暖，看着我 Baby, stay warm, see by me
整个城市都有点脏了 The whole city gets a little dirty
看，是的。 Look at that, yeah.
看到他们高大的老手走过来了吗？ See them big old hands coming through?
里面不是有一百个什么都没有吗？ Is there not a one-hundred-nothing inside?
Gambit想说什么 What Gambit's trying to say
正在领取“主宰者”的头盔 is getting Juggernaut's helmet
这并不容易。 ain't gonna be easy.
我只是在编故事。 I'm just making stuff up with this.
是啊，要承担责任。 Yeah, tilt up to blame.
快跑！ Run!
对费城来说也是一样， This is the same thing to Philly,
我没有听到任何支票。 I haven't heard any checks.
我认为你不应该。 I don't think you should.
你从哪里得到那个小美人？ Where do you get that little beauty?
那是共用18层楼的那间。 That's the one that shares 18 floors.
惩罚是什么？ What's the punishment?
他们大概有五个人。 There's been like five of them.
只有一把刀。 There's only been one blade.
只有一把刀。 There's only ever gonna be one blade.
把它们拿出来，继续上一场演出，比上一场更好 Bring them out, go on the last show, better than last
我里面有一百个什么都没有 I got a one-hundred-nothing inside
带他们出来，带他们出来 Bring them out, bring them out
（发动机转速）你最好上车 (engine revs) You better get on your wheel
你是我的老师，一个葡萄牙语老师 You're my master Boy Who's a Portuguese teacher
你最好做好嘲笑的准备 You better be ready to laughable
我走了，你走了，我不能留下来 I made my way You're aoop You're aoop And I can't stay
手套和牛仔裤我的名字是 gloves and jeans My name is
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
哦，这会很好。 Oh, this is gonna be good.
你知道我等这个多久了吗？ You know how long I've been waiting for this?
哇，我要在这里出名了。 Whoo, I'm about to make a name for myself here.
我认为你们不会就此放弃。 I don't think you guys walk away from this.
你只要确保人们知道 You just make sure people know what
今天发生在这里。 happened here today.
当你离开这里时， When you get out of here,
你给我喝一杯，好吗？ you have a drink for me, yeah?
你不用六个人，进去吧。 You'll stay without six, get inside.
我们会确保你拿到包裹。 We'll make sure you get the package.
我们会得到我们的结局。 And we'll get our ending.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
（尖叫） (screaming)
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
（尖叫） (screaming)
有个混蛋还在这里躲着滑板。 Some motherfucker's still trying to hide skate up here.
（尖叫） (screaming)
你们两个逃跑了，我可以忍受， You two escaping I could live with,
但愿意回来。 but coming back, willingly.
男孩子们真傻。 Boys are so silly.
我只需要回家。 I just need to get home.
嗯，恐怕菜单上没有。 Well, that's not on the menu, I'm afraid.
这是死亡或奴役，当然还有一辆马车。 It's death or enslavement, and a cart, of course.
直到-- Up to the--
（尖叫） (screaming)
最后，很高兴能给予 Finally, it's nice to give
别人有机会说话。 someone else a chance to talk.
不是我的力量，先生。 Not my strength, sir.
（尖叫） (screaming)
我早该知道我会死的。 Should've known I'd die.
（尖叫） (screaming)
再见，本·尼洪。 Adios, Ben Nihon.
（尖叫） (screaming)
你是个有趣的人，不是吗？ You are an interesting one, aren't you?
我确实觉得你在这一切背后迷失了方向。 I do feel like you get lost behind all of this.
（哼） (humming)
在这片空地上，死水一角钱都没有。 Deadpools are a dime a dozen here in the void.
但你，这里发生了什么事？ But you, what's going on in here?
（咆哮） (growling)
（尖叫） (screaming)
有趣。 Interesting.
他们是怎么被选回来的？ How are they selected back here?
在锚后面。 Behind the anchor.
你在躲避他们， You're hiding from them,
从所有你失望的人身上。 from all the ones you let down.
太痛苦了。 So much pain.
我走开了。 I walked away.
他们喊我，我就走了。 They called after me and I walked away.
我总是这样。 I always do.
我知道。 I know.
你做的还不止这些，是吗？ That's not all you did, is it?
（咆哮） (growling)
你找到他们了，X战警？ You found them, the X-Men?
死了。 Dead.
死了？ Dead?
但我会的。 But I would.
你做了什么？ What did you do?
我开始杀人，无法停止。 I started killing and I couldn't stop.
我不想停下来。 I didn't want to stop.
所有这些坏人。 All those bad men.
不仅仅是坏的。 It's not just the bad ones.
我的小动物。 My little animal.
我让全世界都反对X战警。 I turned the whole world against the X-Men.
我只是。 I just was.
我想成为查尔斯·斯托克那样的人。 I want to be the man that Charles Stoker was.
洛根，在你可以成为的空虚中，拥抱你们所有人。 Logan, in the void you can be, hold to you all.
我只想自由。 I just want to be free.
我可以让你自由。 I can set you free.
我可以压制所有这些声音。我抓住你了。 I can silence all those voices. I've got you.
我抓住你了。 I've got you.
我抓住你了。 I got you.
（尖叫） (screaming)
你要送我们回家，我要去扭扭 You're gonna send us home where I'm gonna twist
你他妈的把头掉下来。 your fucking head off.
你为什么笑？ Why are you laughing?
除非你把这件事从我脑子里拿开，否则我不能派你去。 I can't send you unless you get this thing off my head.
一旦你这样做， And as soon as you do that,
我要在原子水平上煮沸你的大脑 I'm going to boil your brains on an atomic level
同时把我的豆子弹到你盒子的尽头。 whilst flicking my bean to the end of your box set.
你盒子的这一端？ This end of your box set?
要么你杀了我，要么我杀了你。 Either you kill me or I kill you.
这两个选择都很棒。 Both wonderful options.
你想让我做吗？ You want me to do it?
不，好莱坞。 No, Hollywood.
我有她的网，真的没问题。 I have her net right here, it's really no problem.
你会搞砸的。 You'll screw it up.
哦，得了吧，PT-13先生 Oh come on, Mr. PT-13
除了最后一个。 except the last one.
卧槽？ What the fuck?
不，不，不。 No, no, no.
你根本不知道那是什么样子。 You have no idea what it's like.
日复一日，铲屎。 Day after day, shovel the shit.
把肉拿来。 Fetch the meats.
我已经花光了我的全部-- I have spent my entire--
史提芬！ Steven!
不是每个人都能发表演讲。 Not everyone gets a speech.
她会死的。 She's gonna die.
好吧，嘿，嘿，如果我摘下这顶头盔， Okay, hey, hey, if I take this helmet off,
你保证不会杀我们。 you promise you won't kill us.
我保证我会先杀了你。 I promise I will kill you first.
你为什么这样？ Why are you like this?
我希望我知道。 I wish I knew.
把它摘下来。 Take it off.
什么？ What?
把它摘下来。 Take it off.
为什么？ Why?
把它摘下来。 Just take it off.
这是我们解决问题的唯一机会。 This is our only chance to fix our shit.
把它摘下来！ Take it off!
我穿着一套西装。 I am wearing a suit.
这意味着很多事情， And that means a lot of things,
但最重要的是，这意味着我是X战警。 but most of all, it means I'm an X-Man.
我认识你哥哥。 And I know your brother.
尽管我要杀了你， As much as I'm gonna fucking kill you,
我身体里的每一根骨头都会杀了你。 every bone in my body must fucking kill you.
他不会让我站在这里看着你死的。 He would not let me stand here and watch you die.
致甘佐夫。 To Ganzhoff.
这是给他的。 This is for him.
这是给查尔斯的。 This is for Charles.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
你不敢像约翰尼那样做。 Don't you dare do it like Johnny.
我哥哥爱你。 My brother loved you.
他爱我们所有人？ He loved all of us?
嗯，一定很不错。 Hmm. Must be nice.
他也会爱你的。 He would have loved you too.
如果他知道你的事， If he knew about you,
如果他知道你在哪里，他会撕一个 if he knew where you were, he would have torn a
他妈的宇宙中的洞，带你回家。 hole in the fucking universe to bring you home.
这是给他的。 This is for him.
至少让我们救他。 At least let us save his.
不，我不会那么说。 No, I'm not gonna say that.
我不会那么说。你想听一些疯狂的事情吗？ I'm not gonna say that. You wanna hear something crazy?
我是一个在这里翻滚的欢呼魔术师 And I'm a cheer magician who rolled through here
不久前。 a while back.
我当然杀了他， I killed him, of course,
他的皮肤已经磨损了四天。 wore his skin around for four days.
但我感觉到了这个小饰品 But I felt this little trinket
在他可爱的手指上。 on his lovely fingers.
奇怪。 Strange.
非常闪亮的圆圈。 Very sparkly circle.
那是什么？ What is that?
这是你回家的路。 This is your way home.
我欠你救了我的命， I do owe you for saving my life,
但让我们保持有趣。 but let's keep things interesting.
我想你有大约四秒钟的时间 I'd say you have about four seconds
在你的生命结束之前。 before your life's through.
跟你比赛。 Race you.
再见 I'll be seeing you
在所有熟悉的旧事物中 In all the old familiar
我来回答 I'll answer
你有这颗心 You got this heart
拥抱你 Embrace you
一整天 All day through
在那间小咖啡馆里 In that small cafe
你的垃圾桶等着 Your trash can wait
丛林就在这里 And the jungle is here so
丛林在等待 The jungle is waiting
我们会知道的 We shall know
再见 I'll be seeing you
在每一个可爱的夏日 In every lovely summer's day
我会在清晨的阳光下找到你 I'll find you in the morning sun
当夜幕降临 And when the night is through
我会看着月亮 I'll be looking at the moon
但我会再见到你的 But I'll be seeing you
我想，我们有一个标准的三年 As I guess, we got a standard three year
一对一保修。 bummer to bummer warranty.
很高兴你给了我们第二次机会。 Glad you gave us a second chance.
别担心，韦德和我是一个团队， And don't worry, Wade and I are a team,
所以我会再见到你的——（枪声） so I'll see you again after-- (gun fires)
那感觉就像一辆他妈的童车，不是吗？ That feels like a fucking kid car, wasn't it?
哦。 Oh.
天哪，那是死侍。 Holy shit, that's Deadpool.
那是金刚狼。 That's Wolverine.
你他妈的直。 You damn straight it is.
狐狸杀了他。 Fox killed him.
迪士尼把他带回来了。 Disney brought him back.
他们要让他做这件事，直到他90岁。 They're gonna make him do this till he's 90.
走吧。 Let's go.
我给你打卡。 I'll clock you out.
永远。 Forever.
醒醒。 Wakey wakey.
可以。 Okay.
现在你把这些子弹都塞进我肚子里 Now you put all these bullets in my belly
我会找出原因的。 and I'm gonna find out why.
哇，哇！ Whoa, whoa!
你怎么说的？ How'd you say it?
你不必把手指插在我身上。 You don't have to stick your fingers in me.
天啊，偶尔问问。 Jesus, just ask sometimes.
好的。 Fine.
真的？ Really?
手和口袋。 Hands and pockets.
一个叫希罗多德的人。 A guy named Herodox.
他说他会把我从空虚中解放出来。 He said he'd give me out of the void.
我只知道他在TVA工作。 All I know is he works for the TVA.
TVA？ The TVA?
你不同意他的观点。 You didn't agree with him.
我不同意他的观点。 I didn't agree with him.
我不认为这家伙在乎。 I don't think this guy cares.
嗯，他会的。 Huh, he will.
嘿，伙计们，还要多久 Hey people, how much longer
在时间报告器激活之前？ before the time repper is active?
我们正在进行最后的安全检查。 We're running the final safety checks.
哦，好吧，谢谢你的辛勤工作， Oh, okay, all right, thanks for all your hard work,
拉尔夫，跳一跳。 Ralph, take a jump.
真的？ Really?
不，你这流口水的家伙。 No, you drooling boob.
不，我们有客人， No, we have company,
取消安全检查。 cancel the safety checks.
我们现在需要活着。 We need to be live now.
哦，我救了你很多。 Oh, I saved you so much.
不，停下来，滚开，你来晚了。 No, stop, piss off, you're too late.
他妈的完了。 Fucking done.
我哭得更厉害了。 I was more crying.
你怎么敢？ How dare you?
无人能从虚空中归来。 No one comes back from the void.
告诉卡桑德拉·诺尔瓦。 Tell that to Cassandra Nolva.
Peridox，我们有个问题。 Peridox, we have a problem.
Peridox？ Peridox?
当你比你在Peridox脑海中看到的更阴沉时， When you are dourier than you looked in Peridox's head,
你想杀了我。 you tried to kill me.
我真的不知道。 I literally have no idea.
我是国王，你最好杀了国王。 I'm the king, you better kill the king.
哦，欢迎来到骷髅俱乐部，Peridox。 Oh, welcome to the skull fuck club, Peridox.
你知道她不会洗屁股的。 You know she doesn't wash that ass.
哦，这是什么？ Oh, what's this?
一个报时员，一个淘气的男孩。 A time repper, a naughty boy.
哦，不，我们开始了，我们要往下走 Oh no, we're on it, we're gonna head down
现在就把那东西拆了。 and dismantle that thing now.
我们抓住你了，嘘，你继续玩那些键。 We got you, boo, you just keep playing those keys.
我不想毁掉它。 I don't want to destroy it.
我想用它。 I want to use it.
现在拍摄，妈妈和爸爸正在谈话。 Now shoot, mommy and daddy are having a conversation.
（尖叫） (screaming)
你知道有趣的事情吗？ You know the funny things?
我在虚空中快乐。 I was happy in the void.
你没有给我送垃圾，我清理了它的生活。 You sent no trash to me, the life that I cleaned it up.
大家都很高兴。 Everyone was happy.
你不得不去我这边的前面撒尿。 And you had to go and piss on my side of the front.
所以现在围栏必须拆掉。 And so now the fence must come down.
我要用一个小计时器 I'm going to use a little time repper
我要毁灭这个宇宙 and I'm going to destroy this universe
下一个、下一个和下一个 and the next and the next and the next
直到剩下的都做完。 until all that's left is done.
我可以向上帝祈祷。 And I get to pray God.
来吧。 Come on.
现在，谁来教我如何使用 Now, who are going to show me how to use
你的这个花哨的小玩意？ this fancy gadget of yours?
别担心，我给一些朋友打过电话了 Don't worry, I've called some friends
他们当然没有被打扰。 and they sure were not disturbed.
很抱歉打扰您，女士， Sorry to bother, madam,
但有些东西你需要看看。 but there's something you need to see.
我们有迹象表明 We're getting indications of an
未经批准的时间报告器在地球上激活1005。 unsanctioned time repper activating on Earth 1005.
那是谁的区？ Whose district is that?
悖论。 Paradox.
亲爱的，非常感谢你的帮助。 Well, thank you so much for your help, darling.
天哪，能摆脱这种想法真好。 God, good to get out of that head.
真是一团糟。 What a mess.
停下。 Stop.
让我们为额外的棍子打一顿。 Let's give it a beat for the extra stick-lear.
走，走，走。 Go, go, go, go.
哦，我的上帝。 Oh my God.
它不见了。 It's gone.
来吧，女孩。 Come on, girl.
我的女儿，我们再也不必成为一辆车了。 My girl, we don't have to be a car ever, ever again.
再也不会了。 Never, ever again.
对不起的。 Sorry.
性交。 Fuck.
咖啡馆感恩在这里做什么？ What's cafe gratitude doing here?
对此我深感抱歉。 Sorry about that.
颤抖的坚果，亲爱的玛丽·埃文斯。 Tremble nut, sweet Mary Evans.
哦，那有点。。。 Oh, that's a little...
过来，女孩。 Come here, girl.
木瓜。 Papazia.
嘿，不要侮辱这种动物的自主性。 Hey, do not insult this animal's autonomy.
她可以决定她爸爸是谁。 She can decide who her papa is.
那会是什么，女孩，嗯？ What's it gonna be, girl, huh?
原始食谱？ Original recipe?
或者这里更温和。 Or then milder here.
哦，这很有趣。 Oh, it's funny.
我也可以轻轻地敲第四面墙。 I can gently tap the fourth wall too.
该提案。 The proposal.
这他妈的是什么？ The fuck was that?
婊子，你以为我就是这么做的吗？ Bitch, you think that's what I do?
你们俩都闭嘴。 Both of you, shut up.
你闻到什么了吗？ You smell something?
是的，你。 Yeah, you.
你们很多人。 A lot of you.
你不知道那边有很多Deadpools吗？ Don't you know a lot of Deadpools over there?
太糟糕了。 That's bad.
我想他们不友好。 I take it they're not friendly.
天啊，不。 Goodness, no.
对此我深感抱歉，孩子们。 Sorry about this, boys.
任务结束。 Mission over.
死因，100。 Cause of death, 100.
杀死口渴的死水。 Kill thirsty Deadpools.
他们是愚蠢的，但他们可以战斗。 They're dumb, but they can fight.
但不是我。 Not me though.
我很想参与其中，但我的骨密度很低 I'd love to get in the mix, but I have low bone density
我必须保护我的脸。 and I have to keep my face safe.
请稍等。 Hold please.
哦，好吧。 Oh, okay.
好吧，看。 All right, look.
伙计们！ Guys!
Deadpool Prime在这里。 Deadpool Prime here.
我们的斗争不是与你。 Our fight isn't with you.
嘿，当我需要你的意见时， Hey, when I want your opinions,
我会把金刚狼的鸡巴从你嘴里拿出来。 I'll take Wolverine's dick out of your mouth.
那是Kidpool，她是最脏的。 That's Kidpool, she's the dirtiest.
我们能就这么结束吗？ Can we just be done?
哦，我们才刚刚开始。 Ooh, we're just getting started.
不不不不。 No, no, no, no, no.
整个多元宇宙的事情。 With the whole multiverse thing.
这不太好。 It's not great.
只是一次又一次的错过。 It's just been miss after miss after miss.
《绿野仙踪》首先创造了多元宇宙 Wizard of Oz did the multiverse first
他们做得最好。 and they did it best.
同性恋者知道，但我们不听。 The gays knew it, but we didn't listen.
让我们拿着L继续前进。 Let's just take the L and move on.
我认为自《终局之战》以来，它一直表现得很好。 I think it's been steadily great since Endgame.
你在说什么？ What are you talking about?
多元宇宙已经结束了。 The multiverse is over.
桑迪每次都会毁了他妈的。 Sandy gonna destroy the fuck out of every time.
我根本不想做这件事。 I don't care to do shit about it.
你不明白吗？ Do you not get it?
如果我们不下车，地铁就停了 If we don't get out of the subway, it's stopped
否则我们都会死。 or we all die.
说老板娘不想惹麻烦。 Say the boss lady don't want no disturbance.
你想去地铁吗？ You wanna get down to the subway?
你要经历什么？ You gotta go through what?
莉齐时间，宝贝。 Lizzy time, baby.
看起来还活着。 Look alive.
（枪声） (gun fires)
我想我被击中了。 I think I'm hit.
哎呀，你是故意的。 Oh shit, you did that on purpose.
我没有做过这样的事。 I did no such thing.
听我说，美人儿。 Listen to me, gorgeous.
你需要多长时间才能再生？ How long does it take for you to regenerate?
再生？ Regenerate?
你真的是上帝的完美白痴，不是吗？ You really are God's perfect idiot, aren't you?
我没事。 I'm okay.
你怎么敢，你这个麻木不仁的混蛋。 How dare you, you insensitive son of a bitch.
我怎么知道他不会再生？ How was I supposed to know he doesn't regenerate?
我不是女药师。 I'm not a medicine woman.
看，一辆甜甜圈车。 Look, a donut cart.
它们实际上是医院。 They're practically hospitals.
他们出售便携式分诊设备。 They sell portable triage units.
我知道。 I know.
我会把你送到安全的地方。 I'm gonna get you to safety.
求你了，爸爸。 Please, Papa.
深呼吸。 Deep breath.
（发动机转速） (engine revs)
嘿，我们在哪里停？ Hey, where are we stopping?
只是喘口气。 Just catching my breath.
你的腿在度假吗？ Are your legs on vacation?
你太重了。 You're dead weight.
只是因为我瘫痪了。 Just because I'm paralyzed.
我们都有问题。 We all have problems.
听我说。 Listen to me.
你会活下去的。 You're gonna live.
看着我，漂亮的电话。 Look at me, nice call.
过来。 Here, come over here.
说吧。 Say it.
我要活下去。 I'm gonna live.
跟我说。 Say it with me.
你会活下去的。 You're gonna live.
哈哈。 Ha ha.
跟我说。 Say it with me.
我要活下去。 I'm gonna live.
别开枪。 Hold your fire.
可爱的小狗。 Sweet little puppy.
（狗叫） (dog barks)
我觉得他撑不过去了。 I don't think he's gonna make it.
上帝，他爱他的脸。 God, he loved his face.
我能尝到他最后的想法。 I could taste his final thought.
他非常害怕。 He was so afraid.
但他死得像个英雄。 But he died a hero.
他死于谋杀，你这愚蠢的混蛋。 He died from murder, you dumb fuck.
我只需要记住他 All I have to remember him by
这两个是镀金的吗， are these two gold-plated,
50口径沙漠鹰手枪箭。 50 caliber desert eagle pistol arrows.
这是给他的。 This is for him.
你准备好了吗？ Are you ready?
我可以杀死100名年轻人。 I get to kill 100 youths.
操你，我准备好了。 Fuck you, I'm ready.
你不想看到这个，兄弟。 You don't wanna see this, bro.
那是个好女孩。 That's a good girl.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
生活是个谜 Life is a mystery
每个人都必须独自站立 Everyone must stand alone
我听见你呼喊我的名字 I hear you cry my name
感觉就像 And it feels like
我回来了 I'm home
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
我的天呐 Holy shit.
你把好东西留到特殊场合？ You saved the good stuff for special occasions?
主要是杀人。 Killing mostly.
那些吹扫头的风阻是多少？ What's the wind resistance on those blowjob headings?
对不起，只是一张糟糕的照片，但我很嫉妒。 Sorry, just a gatty picture, but I'm jealous.
好吧，我们开始吧。 All right, let's do this.
最大的努力。 Maximum effort.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
（风吹） (wind blowing)
当我回到 When I go back to
吸一点 Suck a little bit
我有很多 I've got so many
我要带你回去 I'm gonna take you back
离开我的头 And leave my head
我能感觉到你的骨头 I can feel your bones
刚才，哦，是的，你知道我会带你回去的 Just now, oh yeah You know I'll take you back
我看见你了，我要带你回去（戏剧性的音乐） I see you I'm gonna take you back (dramatic music)
你知道你只是不知道 You know you just don't know
你知道我会带你回去的 You know I'll take you back
卧槽？ What the fuck?
我希望我有。 I wish I would have.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
我要带你回去 I'm gonna take you back
刚才，哦，是的 Just now, oh yeah
当我回去的时候，我会带你回去 When I go back to I'm gonna take you back
我要带你回去 I'm gonna take you back I'm gonna take you back
（戏剧性的音乐）（崩溃） (dramatic music) (crashing)
得了吧，我搞砸了。 Come on, I blew it.
毕竟，你唯一能记住的就是 After all that, the only thing you're gonna remember
那真是可怕的下马。 is that god-awful dismount.
（吱吱声） (squeaking)
你在笑什么，小混蛋？ What are you laughing at, little fucker?
哦，不。 Oh no.
我想这些可以再生。 I guess these ones regenerate.
来吧，我们还有时间。 Come on, we have time for this.
死傻瓜，站起来。 Dead fools, stand down.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
（崩溃） (crashing)
这个死傻瓜跟我在一起。 This dead fool's with me.
哦，不。 Oh no.
我的天呐 Holy shit.
他妈的是彼得。 That's fucking Peter.
（尖叫） (screaming)
等等，你们认识彼得吗？ Wait, you guys know Peter?
你在开玩笑吧？ Are you kidding me?
每个傻瓜都有一个彼得。 Every dead fool has a Peter.
妈的，彼得是个该死的传奇 Shit, Peter's a god damn legend
在每个傻瓜的世界里。 in every dead fool's world.
给我点东西。 Give me something.
（尖叫） (screaming)
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
享受我的彼得。 Enjoy my Peter.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
（崩溃） (crashing)
哦，现在你来了。 Oh, now you're here.
哦，好吧，你来晚了，一切都结束了。 Oh well, you're too late, it's all over.
还没有，还没有。 Not yet, it's not.
不不不但是我们很接近。 No, no, no, no, but we're very close.
回家吧，伙计们，答应我。 Homestretch, folks, promise.
快点，我们吃牛排吧。 Quick, let's have the steaks.
如果她偷走了代表的时间， If she steals the time represented,
她有粉碎的能力 she has the power to shred
所有现实的结构 the fabric of all the realities
直到只剩下空虚。 until there is nothing left but the void.
我们如何关闭它？ How do we shut it down?
我不知道。 I don't know.
（崩溃） (crashing)
面具真的很吓人，是吧？ The mask is really intimidating, huh?
这就像蝙蝠侠，除了他能移动脖子。 It's like Batman except he can move his neck.
好的，你看，你看。 Okay, look, look, look, look, look.
（崩溃） (crashing)
裂土器由地下安全室供电。 The Ripper is fed from a secure chamber below ground.
它由双物质和反物质提供动力 It is powered by twin matter and antimatter feeds
在设备内部汇聚。 converging inside the device.
现在Cassandra Nova正在重新定向开膛手的力量 Now Cassandra Nova is redirecting the Ripper's power
从这个开始，消除所有时间线。 to eliminate all timelines, starting with this one.
理论上，你可以阻止她 Theoretically, you could stop her
通过使下方腔室中的进料短路。 by short circuiting the feeds in the chamber below.
你们中的一个会创建一个 One of you would create a
两个馈线之间的电路，然后释放功率 circuit between the two feeds, then the released power
会毁了机器。 would destroy the machine.
但是，来吧，伙计。 But, well, come on, man.
如果你不想吞咽，就吐出来。 If you're not gonna swallow, spit it out.
无论谁建造了这座桥，都会被歼灭。 Whoever formed the bridge would be annihilated.
我可以忍受。 I could live with that.
事实上，我也可以忍受。 I could live with that too, actually.
你什么都不需要活下来。 You don't need to survive anything.
我们就像蟑螂。 We're like cockroaches.
这次不行。 Not this time.
这是物质和反物质。 This is matter and antimatter.
他们相处得不好。 They do not play nicely with each other.
当它们在你体内混合时，你会被雾化。 When they mix in your body, you will be atomized.
如果你不相信我，就相信物理定律。 Trust the laws of physics if you don't trust me.
即使你活得足够长，可以走完这条路， Even if you lived long enough to make the circuit,
你会死在那里的。 you will die down there.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
（发动机转速） (engine revving)
等等，等等。 Hold up, hold up.
你听到楼上那个混蛋了。 You heard that asshole upstairs.
即使我们成功了， Even if we pull this off,
我们死定了。 we're dead, permanently.
这就是为什么它必须是我。 That's why it's gotta be me.
什么？ What?
听着，伙计，这些你都没要求。 Look, man, you didn't ask for any of this.
你说得对。 You were right.
我撒谎了。 I lied.
我当着你的面撒了谎。 I lied right to your face.
只是为了让你帮助我，你做到了。 Just to get you to help me, you did.
你没有撒谎。 You didn't lie.
你许了一个有教养的愿望。 You made an educated wish.
来吧。 Come on.
你有整个世界可以回去。 You got a whole world to go back to.
我什么都没有。 I got nothing.
把这个给我。 Give me this.
嘿。 Hey.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
我为这支球队等了很久。 I waited a long time for this team up.
你知道吗？ You know something?
你是最棒的金刚狼。 You're the best Wolverine.
替我向你的朋友们问好。 Say hi to your friends for me.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
打开门。 Open the door.
我听不见你做出如此崇高的牺牲。 I can't hear you over all the noble sacrifice.
你他妈的为什么这么做？ Why are you fucking doing this?
因为我是漫威耶稣。 Because I'm Marvel Jesus.
我们是史波克。 We're Spock.
不是吗，山姆？ Aren't you, Sam?
嘿！ Hey!
你他妈的。 You're fucking it.
（笑） (laughs)
对不起，我只是在拖延。 Sorry, I'm just stalling.
我想我对死亡感到紧张。 I think I'm nervous about dying.
你应该是我。 You should be me.
替我向我的朋友们问好，彼得。 Say hi to my friends for me, Peter.
为什么？ Why?
你想成为一个令人讨厌的人吗？ You wanna be an annoying type?
你只是很抱歉。 You're just sorry.
你会再死一次的，你别他妈的。 You're gonna die again, you don't fuck.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
嘿，你不需要这样做。 Hey, you don't need to do this.
我这样做不是因为我需要它。 I'm not doing it because I need it.
我这样做是因为他们这样做。 I'm doing it because they do.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
不 No!
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
（枪声） (gun fires)
不 No!
好吧。 All right.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
他撑不过去了。 He's not gonna make it.
（枪声） (gun fires)
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
结束了。 It's over.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
（枪声） (gun fires)
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
金刚狼是我世界里的英雄。 The Wolverine is a hero in my world.
不管你以为我是谁，你找错人了。 Whoever you think I am, you got the wrong guy.
你总是错的人。 You were always the wrong guy.
直到你没有。 Till you weren't.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
等待。 Wait.
等等，你终于可以，终于，重要了。 Wait, you can finally, finally, matter.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
菲利斯。我见过凡妮莎。 Phyllis. I've seen Vanessa.
这是我人生中第一次感到自豪。 For the first time in my life, I am proud.
事情就是这样。 The way it is.
他的意思是我是前男友。 He means I'm an ex-man.
我是前男友。 I am the ex-man.
（戏剧音乐） (dramatic music)
塔兰托克斯。 Tarrantox.
你一直很忙。 You've been busy.
嗯，有人去过。 Well, somebody has been.
我们从这个地方得到了一些奇怪的读数。 We had some strange readings from this location.
你根本不知道 You wouldn't know anything about an
未经批准的时光河，你会吗？ unsanctioned time river, would you?
不，不，我什么都不知道 No, no, I wouldn't know anything
关于一条未经批准的时光河。 about an unsanctioned time river.
也许你应该问问卡桑德拉·诺瓦， Maybe you should ask Cassandra Nova,
因为我确信 because I was assured that
她被安全地关在虚空中。 she was safely held in the void.
但是没有，她在这里，她抚摸着我的大脑。 But no, she was here and she fondled my brain.
她怎么会让这种事发生的？ How did she let this happen?
你根本没有参与。 You weren't involved at all.
是的，是的，我阻止了她。 In stopping her, yes, yes, I was.
但远远不够。 But not nearly enough.
没有她身后的那些人那么多。 Not as much as the men who went down there after her.
我的男人，我的朋友， My men, my friends,
我警告过他们，但他们会被彻底消灭的 I warned them, but they would be completely obliterated
如果他们去了，但他们还是去了，就像， if they went, but they went anyway, like,
像英雄一样。 like heroes.
因为他们就是这样。 Because that's who they were.
他们只是做了他们必须做的事。 They just did what they had to do.
我们都关心自己的安全。 We both concerned for their own safety.
我们仍然站在这里 The fact that we are all still standing here
是他们英雄主义的证明。 is a testament to their heroism.
不管怎样，你我都无能为力 Anyway, there's nothing you or I can do
现在就把他们带回来。 to bring them back now.
他生了个小女孩，妈的！ He has risen baby girl Fuck!
我不想让你看到我 And I don't want you to see me
因为我觉得我们没有任何风格 Cause I don't think we're made in any style
不，一切都是为了被打破 No, everything's made to be broken
我只是想让你知道为什么 I just want you to know why
现在，这是你的新主播，皮特。 Now, here's your new anchor, Pete.
我们做得很好。 And we're doing just fine in piece of shit.
确实不错。 Fine indeed.
好吧，把你的油 All right, put your greasy
走开，你这爱打扮的荡妇。 tits away, you preening slut.
我不明白。 I don't understand.
你们俩怎么还活着？ How are you two still alive?
你说得对，我们中的一个人会被杀的。 You're right, one of us would have been killed.
但你把死侍和金刚狼放在一起， But you put a Deadpool and a Wolverine together,
让他们在听麦当娜的时候牵手？ make them hold hands while listening to Madonna?
坚不可摧的混蛋。 Indestructible motherfucker.
让我们把这个Deadpool变体带回虚空。 Let's get this Deadpool variant back to the void.
等等，等等，什么？ Wait, hold on, what?
不，事实上，这是国产的。 Nope, actually, this one's homegrown.
像我一样，他属于这里。 Like me, he belongs here.
你呢？ And you are?
彼得·普尔。 Peter Poole.
但你可以叫我彼得。 But you can call me Peter.
我希望你这样做。 And I hope that you do.
这里到底发生了什么？ What the fuck is happening here?
你正在接受审判 You are under judgment
用于操作未经批准的时间开膛手。 for operating an unsanctioned time-ripper.
拿着。 Take it.
我只是在做你没有勇气做的事。 I was just doing what you don't have the guts to do.
下车，下车，你的拳头要松开。 Get off, get off, your fists want hands off fists.
我很感激，先生们。 I'm grateful, gentlemen.
让我们控制一下大便。 Let's hold the bowels.
你把一个Omega级别的变种人带到了这个时间线。 You led an Omega level mutant to this timeline.
不客气。 You're welcome.
你甚至不应该接近这个时间线。 And you shouldn't even be near this timeline.
欢迎他。 He's welcome.
你穿那套衣服真好看。 And you look damn good in that suit.
我很抱歉。 I'm so sorry.
（电话铃声） (phone ringing)
我想给你看样东西。 I wanna show you something.
巨大的东西。 Something huge.
这就是童子军团长凯文过去常说的话。 That's what Scoutmaster Kevin used to say.
你看到了吗？ Do you see that?
你的宇宙正在再生。 Your universe is regenerating.
无论你在这里做了什么，你不仅拯救了你的世界， Whatever you did here, you not only saved your world,
你使你的时间线免于灭绝。 you spared your timeline from extinction.
我搞砸了。 I've messed up.
我感觉到你的工作 I have a feeling your work
这才刚刚开始。 is only just getting started.
直到你90岁。 Till you're 90.
等待！ Wait!
我们不可能从虚空中走出来 We couldn't have made it out of the void
没有一些人的帮助 without some help from some people
这个世界有点忘记了。 that the world kinda forgot.
你有什么办法可以找到办法吗 Is there any way that you could maybe find a way
把他们带回家？ to bring them home?
我看看我能做什么。 I'll see what I can do.
我向我在这里的朋友承诺，TVA可以撤销 And I promised my friend here that the TVA could undo
他的时间线上有些非常糟糕的东西。 some pretty awful shit in his timeline.
你会怎么说？ What would you say to that?
改变了过去。 Changed the past.
他确实帮助我拯救了世界。 He did help me save the world.
他的过去让他成为了做这件事的人。 And his past made him the man who did it.
没什么可修的，威尔逊先生。 There's nothing to fix, Mr. Wilson.
看看他。 Look at him.
托玛，我现在可以吃饭了。 Torma, I get to eat now.
你知道复仇者联盟发现了托玛。 You know the Avengers discovered Torma.
有你我会很幸运的。 I'd be lucky to have you.
（狗叫） (dog barking)
（狗气喘吁吁） (dog panting)
滚开！ Fuck off!
守住我的小国家， Hold my little country,
他有协议，你完蛋了。 he has a deal, you're up through fiber.
看，世界上一切都好。 Look, all is right in the world.
是的。 Yes it is.
那么，你接下来打算做什么？ So what are you gonna do next?
我会想出办法的。 I'll figure it out.
我总是这样。 I always do.
好吧。 All right.
所以我可能会在附近见到你。 So I'll probably see you around.
可能不会。 Probably not.
再见，妈妈。 See you, mother.
霍根！ Hogan!
艾尔，我的背。 Al, my back.
该死的时间，你拿着它。 About damn time, you hold it.
我完全不跳舞了 I'm all out of devil's dancin'
我像愤怒的壁炉一样颤抖。 and I'm shaking like an angry fireplace.
谢谢你，艾尔。 Thank you, Al.
我们有客人。 We have company.
木槿花，这是洛根。 Althea, this is Logan.
很高兴认识你，洛根。 Nice to meet you, Logan.
我也很高兴认识你。 Nice to meet you too.
而这个小小的古老， And this little ancient,
肛门屎结是玛丽·波平斯。 anal shit-knot is Mary Poppins.
或者我喜欢叫她“狗池”。 Or as I like to call her, dog pool.
你想治一下中风吗？ You wanna treat yourself to a little stroke?
看看舌头。 Look at the tongue.
哦，天哪，混蛋！ Oh my God, motherfucker!
对，就像犰狳和小精灵上床一样， Right, it's like an armadillo fucked a gremlin,
愤怒地，躺在一张淋病的床上， angrily, in a bed of gonorrhea,
直到太阳升起才停下来。 and didn't stop till the sun came up.
每个人都想重要。 Everyone wants to matter.
事实证明，你不需要 Turns out that you don't need to be
比耶稣更能做到这一点。 more than Jesus to do it.
你只需要睁开眼睛环顾四周。 You just need to open your eyes and look around.
如果你幸运的话， And if you're lucky,
你会找到几个朋友。 you'll find a few friends.
老朋友和一些新朋友。 Old friends and some new ones too.
（人群歌唱） (crowd singing)
把那只该死的狗给我，跟那个女孩谈谈。 Give me the fucking dog, talk to the girl.
（人群歌唱） (crowd singing)
哦，嗨。 Oh, hi.
你好。 Hi.
你一直很忙吗？ You've been busy?
我这样做是为了你。 I did it for you.
如果你不想要我，我是为你做的。 If you don't want me, I did it for you.
事实证明，我是世界上的储蓄型。 Turns out, I am the world's saving type.
如果你想要证据，就看看这张桌子。 Just look around this table if you want proof.
最好的部分是， For the best part,
有时我们拯救的人， sometimes the people we save,
他们立刻救了我们。 they save us right back.
（人群歌唱） (crowd singing)
你不是唯一一个拥有天赋的人。 You are not the only one with gifts.
这是什么地方？ What is this place?
（人群唱歌） (crowd singing)
又一个转弯，路口卡住了 Another turn and boy, a fork stuck in the road
我抓住你的休息，指引你去哪里 I grabbed you by the rest, direct you where to go
不要充分利用这次测试，并注意原因 Don't make the best of this test and notice why
这不是一个问题，而是一个时间的教训，你好。 It's not in question but a lesson in time Hi, you.
这是斯坦利。 This is Stanley.
（人群唱歌） (crowd singing)
我真的很喜欢死侍漫画里的艺术。 I really like the art in the Deadpool comics.
你知道，我总是感觉和他有一种亲缘关系。 You know, I just always felt kind of a kinship to him.
我希望有一天能扮演那个家伙。 I like to play that guy someday.
（人群唱歌） (crowd singing)
我在那里呆了三个星期 I was there for three weeks
在我拍摄任何物体之前。 before I shot a single thing.
拍摄的第一天，我非常紧张。 For that first day of shooting, I was so nervous, man.
每个人都在说：“利用这个人。” Everyone was sort of going, "Use this guy."
你知道，这样的事还有很多。 You know, there was a lot of that.
你知道，他要实现梦想了，你能感觉到 You know, he was going to deliver and you can feel all
那种压力。 that kind of pressure.
西装总是很冷。 Always the suits are cold.
永远都做不到这一点。 Never be able to do that.
（欢快的音乐） (upbeat music)
（哭泣） (crying)
这是唯一的办法。 This is the only way.
有东西可以保护我们的骨骼 Got something to protect our bones
其他人也一样 And the others right
我希望你结束你的人生 I hope you end the time of your life
噢，原来是这样。 Oh, this is what it is.
还有 Alexa。 And there's Alexa.
我是一名医学研究员。 I'm a medical researcher.
再见，媒体。 Bye, media.
再见。 Bye.
（人群唱歌） (crowd singing)
（欢快的音乐） (upbeat music)
（激昂的音乐） (dramatic music)
（欢快的音乐） (upbeat music)
（欢快的音乐）（欢快的音乐） (upbeat music) (upbeat music)
（笑） (laughing)
我厌倦了这些绝对卑鄙的谣言 I'm tired of these absolutely vile rumors
我害死了约翰尼。 that I got Johnny killed.
我们来看看录像带吧。 Let's look at the tape.
在虚空中，你要么成为 Elias 的食物 In the void, you're either food for Elias
或者你为她工作。 or you work for her.
继续吧，约翰尼。 Go on, Johnny.
我会告诉你她是谁。 And I'll tell you who her is.
卡桑德拉·诺瓦 (Cassandra Nova)，一个狂妄自大、精神病的混蛋。 Cassandra Nova, a megalomaniacal psychotic asshole.
舔手指的死精灵板 A finger-licking dead inside pixie slab
在达克内尔的三流廉价商店里。 at third rate dime store in Ducknell.
我会告诉你她能做什么。 And I'll tell you what she can do.
我在听。 I'm listening.
她可以把我的肉桂圈舔干净 She can lick my goddamn cinnamon ring clean
并将石头一直踢到光秃秃的地狱。 and kick rocks all the way to bald hell.
事实上，我不在乎她是否剥去我所有的皮肤 In fact, I don't give a shit if she removes all my skin
就像一个噩梦般的血气球一样把我戳破了。 and pops me like some nightmarish blood balloon.
如果我最后能做的事情，上帝抛弃我， If the last thing I do with this, God forsaken,
来揭穿她的存在， come gut her existence,
就像那个他妈的盒子 is like that fuck box on a
火我还是不会幸福地死去。 fire I still won't die happy.
天啊，姑娘，你疯了。 Holy shit, girl, you crazy.
没错，等一下。 That's right, wait.
直到我小便完我才会开心 I won't be happy until I've urinated
在一具刚刚烤好的尸体上 on a freshly barbecued corpse
和外壳他妈的风铃仍然 and husk fuck that chime remains
一边漱口一边发出巨响。 while gargling juggernuts juggernuts.
哇。 Wow.
你也可以引用我的话。 And you can quote me.
好的。 Okay.
明白了，操你脸。 Gotcha, fuck face.