1961年8月13日，周日 On Sunday, August 13, 1961...
全美国的目光都聚焦在首都 the eyes of America were on the nation's capital...
罗杰·马里斯在对阵华盛顿参议员队 的比赛中打出了职业生涯 where Roger Maris was hitting home runs number 44 and 45...
第44、45记本垒打 against the Senators.
就在同一天，毫无预警的情形下 On that same day, without any warning...
东德共产党封锁了 the East German Communists sealed off the border...
东西柏林之间的边界 between East and West Berlin.
我说起这些只是为了 I only mention this...
说明我们正要对付的这类人 to show the kind of people we're dealing with
真的是诡计多端 real shifty.
我曾驻在柏林并与他们打过交道 Having been stationed in Berlin and having dealt with them...
我知道自己在说什么 I know what I'm talking about.
时间回到去年六月 Let's go back to last June.
考虑到一个分裂城市的反常情势 Considering the abnormal situation of a divided city...
柏林的日常生活多多少少还是正常的 life in Berlin was more or less normal.
勃兰登堡门前车辆自由穿梭 Traffic flowed freely through the Brandenburg Gate...
而且从铁幕的一边 and it wasn't really too much trouble...
去到铁幕的另一边 to pass from one side of the Iron Curtain...
也并不是太麻烦 to the other.
东德的警察有一部分是既粗鲁又多疑 Some of the East German police were rude and suspicious.
另一部分呢，既多疑又粗鲁 Others were suspicious and rude.
在东柏林，共产党独揽大局 The eastern sector, under Communist domination...
城区里依然是一片废墟 was still in rubble...
但人们还是要进行每日例行活动 but the people went about their daily business...
游行 parading.
这些持续的挑衅 These constant provocations...
并未能激怒西柏林的市民们 failed to provoke the West Berliners.
他们正紧锣密鼓的进行重建 They were too busy rebuilding.
西柏林受盟军的保护 The western sector, under Allied protection...
一片和平与繁荣 was peaceful, prosperous...
享受着民主带来的一切恩惠 and enjoyed all the blessings of democracy.
巧的是 Just by coincidence...
我工作的公司就在这其中 this happens to be the company I work for.
非常感谢 Danke schön.
非常感谢，弗里茨 Danke schön, Fritz.
非常感谢 Danke schön.
非常感谢，真及时 Danke schön already.
坐下吧 Sitzen machen.
施莱默！ Schlemmer!
早上好，麦克纳马拉先生 Good morning, Mr. MacNamara.
施莱默，我跟你说过多少次了 Schlemmer, how many times have I told you...
我不想每次一进办公室就看到 I don't want those people standing at attention...
那些人为我起立 every time I come into the office.
明白。我会下达严格命令的 I know. I've given strict orders.
他们还没从军国主义的统治中缓过来吗？ Can't they get it through their Prussian heads?
现在是民主社会了 They're living in a democracy now.
这就是问题所在了 That is the trouble.
过去，如果我命令他们坐着 In the old days, if I ordered them to sit...
他们就会坐着 they would sit.
可如今民主啦，他们想怎样就怎样 Now with a democracy, they do what they want.
他们就是想起立 What they want is to stand.
第二件事，市长办公室有消息了吗？ Next, any word yet from the mayor's office?
有了，先生，他们不同意 Yes, sir. Negative.
他们绝对不会允许我们 They absolutely will not permit us...
在国会大厦安装可乐贩售机 to install a Coke machine in the Reichstag.
有时我真搞不懂到底是谁打赢了这场仗 Sometimes I wonder who won the war.
还有，你帮我太太和孩子们 Next, did you pick up those airline tickets...
订打折机票了吗？ for my wife and children?
是的，先生，订好了 Yes, sir. Positive.
早上六点钟，三张坐席，飞往威尼斯 Three seats on a 6:00 plane to Venice.
中停法兰克福 They change in Frankfurt.
这倒提醒我了 That reminds me.
打电话给法兰克福的工程，让他们给我们 Call the Frankfurt plant and have them ship us...
再船运10万个瓶子来 another 100,000 bottles.
很多人一直在走私可乐到东区 People keep smuggling Cokes into the eastern sector...
却不把空瓶送回来 and not returning the empties.
是的，先生 Yes, sir.
还有，俄国贸易委员会10点半要来 Next, I'm expecting the Russian Trade Commission at 10:30.
等他们来了，直接带他们进来 When they get here, show them right in.
是的，先生 Yes, sir.
还有，施莱默，你被解雇了 Next. Schlemmer, you're fired.
先生？ Sir?
除非你别再在这里跺脚了！ Unless you stop clicking your heels around here!
是的，先生。哦，抱歉，我不由自主了 Yes, sir. Oh, I'm sorry. I keep forgetting myself.
以前盖世太保就这么训练的，对不？ That old Gestapo training, huh?
别介，麦克纳马拉先生。您快别这么说 Please, Mr. MacNamara. You mustn't say that.
这不是真的 It is not true.
咱俩别保密了，施莱默，说说你战时是干嘛的？ Just between us, Schlemmer, what did you do during the war?
我在地下工作 I was in der untergrund
在地下 the underground.
反抗军战士？ Resistance fighter?
不，是司机。在地下工作 No. Motorman. In the underground.
就是，开地铁 You know, the subway.
当然啦，你是反纳粹的，你从不喜欢阿道夫 Of course, you were anti Nazi, and you never liked Adolf.
阿道夫是谁？ Adolf who?
你看，我在地下 You see, down where I was...
我可不知道上面发生什么事 I didn't know what was going on out there.
从没人跟我说过 Nobody ever told me anything.
就说到这吧，施莱默 That'll be all, Schlemmer.
出去吧！ Herausmachen!
早上好，麦克纳马拉 Guten Morgen, MacNamara.
你也早上好，英格伯格小贼 (麦克的德语读音错了) And a guten Morgen to you, Fräulein Ingeborg.
不是“小贼” It is not "frow line."
是“小姐”，有个元音变音的 It is "froy line" with an umlaut.
好吧。月报表给我 I'll say. Monthly report.
给乔治亚州亚特兰大市总部的 文德尔·P·哈泽汀 To Wendell P. Hazeltine, home office, Atlanta, Georgia.
寄信人是柏林分公司的C·R·麦克纳马拉 From C.R. MacNamara, Berlin branch.
生产数据报告 Production figures were made.
共27万箱 270,000 cases.
人均销售量比去年增长百分之5.2 Consumption per capita now 5.2??above last year.
比莱茵白葡萄酒的销量高七倍 Outselling Rhine wine eight to one.
很快将赶超散装啤酒的销量 Rapidly creeping up on draft beer.
第二，宣传活动 Next, publicity campaign...
接下来将针对德国商人们的 午餐习惯重新调整 to reorient German businessmen's lunch succeeding.
已有百分之27的人在吃蒜肠(德国特产)时 会喝可乐 27% now having Coke with their knackwurst.
还有一个真正的大好消息 Now, here's a real hot flash.
我们也许会成为打破铁幕的 We may become the first American company...
第一家美国公司 to crack the Iron Curtain.
我已经开始和一位俄国代理商 I have started preliminary negotiations...
进行初步谈判 with a Russian representative.
前景很乐观，稍后会有更多消息 It looks most promising. More later.
还有 Next...
你上个周末都在干嘛？ what did you do over the weekend?
没干嘛，我待在家里等你来着 Nothing. I stayed home waiting for you.
我尽可能想赶过去的，相信我 I tried to make it, believe me.
我真的没法脱身 I just couldn't get away...
不过今晚会有好消息 but there's good news tonight.
喂？夫人找我吗？ Yes? Mrs. MacNamara?
接进来 Put her on.
喂，菲丽丝。怎么了？ Yes, Phyllis. What's the matter?
是汤米的事。我们这里有点儿小危机 It's Tommy. We're having a little crisis here.
还是让他跟你说吧 Why don't you talk to him?
汤米，你爸爸的电话 Tommy, your father's on the phone.
喂，爸爸。没什么事 Hello, Dad. Nothing.
只不过妈妈反对我带的东西 It's just that Mother's ganging up on me.
你这么说什么意思？ What do you mean by that?
我觉得你妈妈完全正确 I think your mother's absolutely right.
傻子才会带溜冰鞋呢 It's silly to pack them.
你在威尼斯穿溜冰鞋有啥用？ What are you going to do with roller skates in Venice?
所有街道都是在水下的 All the streets are underwater.
那又怎么样？我会带潜水呼吸器 和通气管一起去的 So what? I'm taking my aqualung and my snorkel.
过来，你老公要跟你说 Here. Your husband wants to talk to you.
喂，麦克？ Yes, Mac?
听着，菲丽丝，他想带什么就让他带好了 Look, Phyllis. Let him pack what he wants.
好吧，我宠坏他了，没啥大不了 All right. I'm spoiling him. Big deal.
别担心，5点钟会有车到家门口 Don't worry. The car will be there at 5:00.
然后你顺路走一下办公室把我带上车 Then you'll pick me up at the office...
我再送你们去机场 and I'll take you to the airport.
遵命，领导 Yes, mein Führer.
柏莎想问你今晚要不要 Bertha wants to know what you'd like...
回家吃晚饭 to have for dinner tonight.
哦，跟她说不用费心了 Oh, tell her not to bother.
我有一大堆工作要做呢 I've got a desk full of work.
到时候去哪里随便吃一点就行 I'll just grab a quick bite somewhere.
拜拜，亲爱的 So long, dear.
我说的吧，好消息啊 Like I said, good news.
你老婆，她要出去旅游？ Your wife. She's making a trip?
那可不 Is she ever.
她要带孩子一起去度假 Going on vacation mit die kinder.
是嘛 Ach so.
所以今晚，我们可以分食一块炸猪排 So tonight, we'll split a schnitzel...
再次开始上德语课 and start on the German lessons again.
应该的，你的德语都要生锈了 We should. You must be getting rusty.
从今开始我们要付出双倍努力学习 We'll just have to work at it twice as hard from now on.
这样好吗？ Das ist gut?
非常好 Sehr gut.
而我们要做的第一件事 就是复习元音变音 And the first thing we're gonna do is brush up on the umlaut.
太好了 Das ist wunderbar.
你像所有下巴伐利亚区的丁香花一般 Like all the lilacs in Lower Bavaria.
共产党的先生们来了 The Communist gentlemen are here.
带他们进来 Send them in.
好了，英格伯格小姐 That'll be all, Fräulein Ingeborg.
用电传打字机把这些发往亚特兰大 Put that on the teletype to Atlanta.
好的 Jawohl.
把你的口香糖带走 And take your gum.
好的 Jawohl.
很高兴再次见到您，米什金同志 Nice to see you again, Comrade Mishkin.
嘿，米什金 Hey, Mishkin.
啊，麦克纳马拉先生 Ah, Mr. MacNamara...
我想向您介绍佩里佩奇科夫委员 I would like to present Commissar Peripetchikoff...
我们贸易委员会的主席 Chairman of our Trade Commission...
以及博洛登科同志 and Comrade Borodenko...
他来自软饮料书记处 from the Soft Drinks Secretariat.
请坐 Sit down.
请坐，先生们 Sit down, boys.
我们没有异议 We have no objection.
香烟？还是雪茄？ Cigarettes? Cigars?
来，试试这个吧 Here. Take one of these.
多谢 Thanks.
哈瓦那产的啊 Made in Havana.
我们和古巴有贸易协定 We have trade agreement with Cuba.
他们给我们雪茄，我们给他们火箭 They send us cigars, we send them rockets.
好主意 Good thinking.
哦，我听米什金同志说 Now, I understand from Comrade Mishkin...
你们非常渴望 that you guys are very keen...
把可口可乐引进到俄国 on getting Coca Cola into Russia.
他完全搞错了 He is totally wrong.
我可没说非常渴望 I did not say we are keen.
我说的是我们比较感兴趣 I said we are mildly interested.
无所谓 Nevertheless...
米什金同志提议我们先开六家装瓶厂 Comrade Mishkin suggested we start with 6 bottling plants...
分别开在莫斯科，列宁格勒， 斯大林格勒，基辅... Moscow, Leningrad, Stalingrad, kiev...
你们知道吗？你们被骗了 You know something? You guys got cheated.
这雪茄是廉价货 This is a pretty crummy cigar.
没关系 Do not worry.
我们给他们的火箭也是次品 We send them pretty crummy rockets.
正如我刚才所说，六家工厂 As I was saying, six plants...
莫斯科，列宁格勒，斯大林格勒 Moscow, Leningrad, Stalingrad...
基辅，哈尔科夫(乌克兰第二大城市)，明斯克，对吧？ kiev, kharkov, and Minsk, right?
完全错了 Totally wrong.
我从没提到明斯克 I never mentioned Minsk.
我说的是平斯克(亦为白俄罗斯城市) I said Pinsk.
好吧。平斯克入围，明斯克出局 All right. Pinsk is in. Minsk is out.
第二点，我们的合同会包含通常的条款 Next, our contract will contain the usual provisions.
我们提供饮料，你们负责装瓶 We supply the syrup, you do the bottling.
当然不行 Certainly not.
我们自己做饮料，你们提供配方 We make our own syrup. You supply the formula.
算了吧，先生们 Forget it, gentlemen.
配方是放在保险库里的 That formula stays in our vaults.
如果我们给了你们，第一个后果便是 We give it to you, first thing we know...
中国共产党会把它弄到手 the Chinese Communists will have it.
没有配方就没得谈 No formula, no deal.
好，不谈就不谈 Ok. No deal.
我们才不需要你们 We do not need you.
如果我们想喝可口可乐，我们自己会发明出来的 If we want Coca Cola, we invent it ourselves.
哦，是吗？ Oh, yeah?
1956年，你们空运了一瓶可口可乐 In 1956, you flew a bottle of Coke...
到斯维尔德洛夫斯克的一个秘密实验室 to a secret laboratory in Sverdlovsk.
一拨你们的顶尖化学家 A dozen of your top chemists...
想分析出其中的成分结果疯了，对不对？ went nuts trying to analyze the ingredients, right?
不予置评 No comment.
1958年，你们在我们位于亚特兰大的总部 And in 1958, you planted two undercover agents...
安插了两名卧底，想窃取配方 in our home office in Atlanta to steal the formula...
结果呢？ and what happened?
他们统统变节了 They both defected...
如今他俩是佛罗里达事业有成的生意人 and now they're successful businessmen in Florida...
贩售包装好的速溶罗宋汤，对吗？ packaging instant borscht, right?
不予置评 No comment.
去年，你们推出了一款山寨的 Last year, you put out a cockamamie imitation
克里姆林宫可乐 kremlin Cola.
你们在卫星国家做实验试喝 You tried it out in the satellite countries...
但连阿尔巴尼亚人都不愿意喝 but even the Albanians wouldn't drink it.
他们把它用作消毒水给羊消毒，对吗？ They used it for sheep dip, right?
不予置评 No comment.
要么谈生意要么走人吧 So either get down to business or get off the pot.
我亲爱的美国朋友 My dear American friend...
如果我们要和平共处的相互合作 if we are to live together in peaceful coexistence...
就得有一定数量的付出与索取 there must be a certain amount of give and take.
哦，是啊。我们付出，你们索取 Oh, sure. We give, and you take.
怎么了？你不相信我们吗？ What is the matter? You do not trust us?
不予置评 No comment.
如果你不介意，我们要开一个小会 If you do not mind, we'll have a little conference.
请便 Help yourself.
这是什么？ What is this?
是我的员工们在柏林空运 My employees gave it to me...
十周年纪念日送我的 on the tenth anniversary of the Berlin Airlift.
同志们，我们还得站在这里 Comrades, are we going to stand here...
听这卑鄙的宣传吗？ and listen to this cheap propaganda?
放松，博里斯 Relax, Boris.
当他们还在把山姆大叔放进 布谷鸟报时钟的时候 While they're putting Uncle Sam in cuckoo clocks...
我们就要把苏维埃宇航员送上月球了 we will put Soviet cosmonaut on moon.
好吧。那么你们哥几个也许就是第一批 把人发射到月球的操控者 Ok. So you guys may be the first to shoot a man to the moon...
但如果这哥们路上想喝可乐 but if he wants a Coke on the way...
你们还是得来找我们 you'll have to come to us.
好吧。我们原则上同意了 All right. We agree in principle.
你们提供可乐 You supply the syrup.
还有，交易要建立在支付专利使用费的基础上 Next, the deal will be set up on a royalty basis.
王室？(英文royalty既有“专利使用费”之意 也有“王室”之意) Royalty?
在俄国，我们自从废黜了沙皇之后 In Russia, we do not have royalty...
就没有王室了 not since we liquidate the Czar.
不管这个，你们要付给我们收入的一部分 Nevertheless, you'll pay us a percentage of the gross.
- 钱？ - 美元 Money? Dollars.
不要美元，你们会得到波修瓦芭蕾舞团的 Instead of dollars, you would accept three week tour...
三周巡演 of Bolshoi Ballet.
别介。不要文化，只要现金 Please. No culture, just cash.
丑陋的美国人 The ugly American.
还有，一旦工厂开工 Next, once the plants are up...
我们要保留监督的权利 we reserve the right of inspection.
当然，我们要保留否决的权利 Of course, and we reserve the right to veto.
我们有权监视... Our inspections will be entitled to
- 我们否决这点。 - 我早就该想到了 We veto it. I thought so.
细节就不用说了 Forget details.
您草拟一份临时协议 You will draw up temporary agreement...
由我们呈递到莫斯科 we will submit to Moscow.
我还得跟乔治亚州亚特兰大的人商量一下 And I'll have to consult with Atlanta, Georgia.
文件什么时候能准备好？ When will papers be ready?
我会让秘书马上开始起草 I'll put my secretary right to work on it.
你的秘书？是那个金发美女吗？ Your secretary? She's that blond lady?
就是她 That's the one.
你要把文件和金发美女送到东柏林 You will send papers to East Berlin...
一式三份 with blond lady in triplicate.
你是要一式三份的文件 You want the papers in triplicate...
还是一式三份的金发美女？ or the blond in triplicate?
那就看你怎么做了 See what you can do.
我们住在波坦金大饭店 We are staying at the Grand Hotel Potemkin.
好。现在想喝点儿伏特加和可乐吗？ Ok. Now, how about a little vodka and Coke?
不了，谢谢 No, thank you.
我们要和瑞士贸易代表团开一个紧急会议 We have emergency meeting with Swiss trade delegation.
他们给我们送了20车的干酪 They sent us twenty carloads of cheese.
完全无法接受，满是破洞啊 Totally unacceptable. Full of holes.
再见 Good bye.
后会有期 See you around the campus.
真诱人啊 Ring a ding ding.
什么事，施莱默？ What is it, Schlemmer?
是长途电话接线员 It is the overseas operator.
您有一通来自乔治亚州亚特兰大的电话 You are to stand by for a call from Atlanta, Georgia.
亚特兰大？他们一定已经收到了我的电报 Atlanta? They must have gotten my teletype.
我打赌他们都在为跟俄国人的交易而激动 I bet they're all worked up about the Russian deal.
- 顺利吗？ - 非常好 It went good? Good?
看这里，施莱默 Look at this, Schlemmer.
整个一片处女地 All virgin territory...
3亿个口渴的同志们 300 million thirsty comrades
伏尔加船夫以及哥萨克骑兵 Volga boatmen and Cossacks...
乌克兰人和外蒙古人 Ukrainians and Outer Mongolians...
都渴望歇息一下喝点饮料 panting for the pause that refreshes.
你知道我要是搞定这单大生意意味着什么吗？ Do you realize what it means if I could put this across?
您的股票，一定会大涨 Your stock, it will go up.
是我身价要大涨，成为一把手 I'll go up to the number one job
统领全欧洲的运营 head of all European operations...
进驻伦敦的总部 headquarters in London.
我可以第一个恭喜您吗？ May I be the first to congratulate you?
我本该五年前就到这个地位了 I should have had that job five years ago.
我当时已准备就绪 I was all set for it...
甚至给自己买了一把伞 even bought myself an umbrella...
但都被本尼·古德曼(美国著名爵士乐手)破坏了 but I got loused up by Benny Goodman.
本尼·古德曼？ Benny Goodman?
我当时掌管整个中东 I was in charge of the whole Middle East
九个国家，十五家装瓶厂，全部朝向麦加 nine countries, fifteen bottling plants, all facing Mecca.
古德曼和他的乐队应美国国务院之邀 Goodman and his band were coming through...
准备过来进行友好巡演 on a goodwill tour for the State Department.
3万人拥至音乐会现场 30,000 people showed up at the concert...
但由于班机受沙尘暴影响延误 but Benny didn't because his plane was delayed...
本尼并未到场，于是群众开始骚乱 by a sandstorm, so the mob rioted...
向着美国大使馆进发 and marched on the American embassy...
然后警察把他们拦了回去 so the police turned them back...
接着他们烧了可口可乐工厂 so they burned down the Coca Cola plant.
你知道的 You know it.
总部那边发生了激烈的争论 There was a big rhubarb at the home office...
突然间我就失宠了 and suddenly, I was in the doghouse...
被流放到南美洲 exiled to South America...
艰难地拖着一批可乐翻越安第斯山脉 schlepping that syrup over the Andes...
骑在美洲驼背上 on llamas yet...
当时一群平头小毛孩 while a bunch of crew cut kids...
踩着我的头就平步青云了！ were being promoted over my head!
但您现在在柏林了 But you're in Berlin now.
说明您又得势了 This is not the doghouse.
是啊，我以前手握九国大权 Yeah. I used to have nine countries.
如今我只有半个城市，而且它随时 都有可能被炸毁 Now I've got half a city, and that may blow up any day...
但麦克纳马拉已然重整旗鼓！ but MacNamara rides again!
我现在即将成为公司的大红人 I'll be the white haired boy now.
我将一往无前！ I'm going all the way!
喂？是亚特兰大打来的 Yes? It's Atlanta.
喂？喂？哈泽汀先生吗？ Hello? Hello? Mr. Hazeltine?
嗯，我能听见你 Yes, I can hear you.
我很好，哈泽汀先生。你呢？ I'm fine, Mr. Hazeltine. How are you?
哦，如果你非要知道，我糟透了 Well, if you must know, I'm miserable.
那些该死的木兰花又开了 Those damn magnolias are in bloom again...
于是我的花粉热又卷土重来 and so is my hay fever.
麦克纳马拉，我有重要的事情 MacNamara, there's something important...
想跟你讨论一下 I'd like to discuss with you.
我早就想到了，哈泽汀先生 I thought you would, Mr. Hazeltine.
您收到我的电报了吗？ You got my teletype?
正放在我面前呢 It's right here in front of me.
五月份的销售数字不坏 Those figures from May are not bad...
一点也不坏 not bad at all.
谢谢您，先生 Thank you, sir.
和俄国人的生意怎么样？ And how about the Russian deal?
拿破仑搞砸了，希特勒也砸了 Napoleon blew it, Hitler blew it...
但可口可乐即将圆满搞定 but Coca Cola's gonna pull it off.
忘了它吧，麦克纳马拉。忘了它吧 Forget it, MacNamara. Forget it.
我们对在铁幕之后做生意 We are not interested in doing business...
没什么兴趣 behind the Iron Curtain.
我们对俄国的市场没兴趣？ We're not interested in the Russian market?
我连碰都不想碰俄国人 I wouldn't touch the Russians with a ten foot pole...
我也不想跟两极(指美苏)之间扯上什么关系 and I don't want anything to do with the Poles, either.
但这有可能是自从我们公司采用 六瓶装箱以来 But this could be the biggest thing for the company...
最大的一桩买卖了！ since we introduced the six pack!
好吧，如果这有悖管理部门的政策 Well, if it's against front office policy
你他妈说的没错 You're damn right...
不过我打给你不是为了这件事的 but that's not what I called you about.
听着，麦克纳马拉 Look, MacNamara.
我希望你私底下帮我一个大忙 I'd like you to do me a big personal favor.
知道，哈泽汀先生 Yes, Mr. Hazeltine?
您想让我再给哈泽汀太太 You want me to ship Mrs. Hazeltine...
运一套迈森瓷器过去是吗？ another set of Meissen china?
错！这次是我女儿斯嘉丽 No! It's about our daughter Scarlett.
她如今17岁了，很甜美 She's seventeen now, sweet girl...
爱上了一个该死的摇滚歌手 fell in love with some damn rock'n'roll singer.
不对，那是上一个 No. That was the one before.
现任是一个满脸痘痘的篮球运动员 This is some pimple faced basketball player.
总之，我们要把她送去欧洲作短途旅行 Anyway, we sent her off on a little trip to Europe.
我说到哪了？ Where was I?
您女儿斯嘉丽，满脸痘痘的篮球运动员 Daughter Scarlett, pimple faced basketball player...
送她去欧洲 sent her to Europe...
哦，没错！ Oh, yes!
我们让她和我们在罗马的代理人 We had her spend a couple of weeks...
待了几个礼拜 with our representative in Rome...
又在我们在巴黎的人那里待了几个礼拜 and a couple of weeks with our man in Paris...
然后她今天下午将抵达柏林 and she's arriving in Berlin this afternoon...
所以我想麻烦你和麦克纳马拉夫人... so I'd appreciate it if you and Mrs. MacNamara
哦，我们很高兴让她跟我们待在一起 Oh, we'd be delighted to have her stay with us.
只是我家已经有了一些计划 It's just that my family has made some plans...
而且我自己也有一些计划 and I have a few plans of my own.
哦，如果你感到我有强迫你，别介意 Well, if it's any sort of imposition, never mind.
抱歉打这个电话给你 I'm sorry I called you.
哦，事实上，我并不是考虑到自己 Well, actually, I wasn't thinking of myself.
我担忧的是您女儿 It's your daughter I'm concerned about.
以柏林如今的政治形势 With the political situation in Berlin the way it is...
随时都有可能发生任何事 anything can happen anytime.
没错 Exactly.
这就是为什么我想要你特别照顾好她 That's why I want you to take especially good care of her.
她还是个孩子，真的 She's just a child, really...
我不想让她一个人住酒店 and I don't like her to stay in a hotel alone...
现在时局这么乱 at a time like this.
她乘坐泛美的航班 She's flying Pan Am.
预计下午4点半到达柏林 The plane is due in Berlin at 4:30...
除非那些该死的共产党把飞机打下来 unless those damn Commies shoot it down.
拿着，你去给她献花 Here. You give her the flowers.
哦，别闹了，菲丽丝！ Oh, cut it out, Phyllis!
我能怎么办呢？ What was I going to do?
老板要我照顾他的独生女 The boss asked me to look after his only daughter.
我不能让他失望 I can't disappoint him.
那你的独生子 What about your only children...
还有你唯一的老婆怎么办？ and your only wife?
我们都打包好了，正准备走呢 We were all packed and ready to go.
你认为我们就不会失望吗？ Don't you think we were disappointed?
相信我，菲丽丝，每个人都很失望 Believe me, Phyllis, everybody's disappointed.
我们只得推掉这几个礼拜的安排 We'll just have to put things off a couple of weeks.
推掉溜冰鞋、潜水通气管还有元音变音 The roller skates and the snorkel and the umlaut.
什么？ The what?
现在，最重要的就是确保 Right now, the important thing is to make sure...
这个女孩在我们这过得愉快， 这样等她回家时 that the girl has a good time so when she goes home...
她说的话全是关于我们柏林的员工的 all she'll talk about is our man in Berlin.
真是讨厌啊 It's such a nuisance.
汤米要搬去辛迪的房间 Tommy will have to move into Cindy's room.
柏莎得学习怎么以南方手法 Bertha will have to learn how to cook sauerbraten...
做醋焖牛肉 southern style.
拜托，菲丽丝。尽力而为吧 Come on, Phyllis. Make an effort.
遵命，领导 Yes, mein Führer.
抱歉，这是从巴黎飞来的飞机吗？ Pardon me, is this the plane from Paris?
是的，先生 Oui, monsieur.
乘客里难道没有一位哈泽汀小姐吗？ Isn't there a Miss Hazeltine among the passengers?
乘客里是有一位哈泽汀小姐 There was a Miss Hazeltine among the passengers...
不过我们把她弄丢了 but we have lost her.
弄丢了？ You lost her?
她跑到机组人员那里去了 She has joined the crew.
斯嘉丽·哈泽汀，我算见识了 Scarlett Hazeltine if I ever saw one.
哈泽汀小姐，我是麦克纳马拉 Miss Hazeltine, I'm MacNamara.
这是麦克纳马拉夫人，欢迎来到柏林 This is Mrs. MacNamara. Welcome to Berlin.
你们好啊！ Hi there!
您的旅途如何？ How was your flight?
妙极了 Just marvy.
这些小伙子们还让我飞过杜塞尔多夫呢 The boys let me buzz Dusseldorf.
可以借一下你的帽子吗？ May I have your hat?
好啦，粉丝们。放进去吧 Ok, fans. Drop them in.
劳驾您，挑一个好吗？ Pick one, will you, please?
很乐意 I'm game.
上面写着什么？ What does it say?
皮埃尔 It says Pierre.
是我！ That's me!
我要去哪里接您呢？ Where do I come to pick you up?
- 我们要住哪？ - 问这干嘛？ What's our address? Why?
哦，我们已经抽奖完毕，皮埃尔赢得了我 Well, we just had this lottery, and Pierre won me.
幸运的皮埃尔 Lucky Pierre.
他是领航员 He's the navigator.
好啦，你还是去调整航向吧，幸运儿 You better change your course, Lucky.
你已经脱离航道了。请这边走，哈泽汀小姐 You're way off the beam. This way, Miss Hazeltine.
再等一下 Now just a darn minute.
再见，粉丝们！ So long, fans!
可这不公平啊！ But that's not fair!
夫人，我以一个女人的身份向您上诉 Madame, I appeal to you as a woman.
事实上，你真就是个女人 As a matter of fact, you do.
再会 Au revoir.
你会像那样吗？ So you're gonna be like that?
像哪样？ Like what?
像罗马和巴黎的那些老呆瓜员工一样 A company man like those old poops in Rome and Paris...
每时每刻都在挑我的毛病，让我束手束脚 breathing down my neck every minute, cramping my style.
听着，哈泽汀小姐 Look, Miss Hazeltine.
你还未成年，而我要服从命令！ You're underage, and I'm under orders!
欧洲真无聊！ Europe what a drag!
我去看了老一套的罗马竞技场和蒙娜丽莎 I've done the Colosseum bit and the Mona Lisa bit...
但他们从不带我去那些美妙的地方 but they never take me to any of those marvy places...
比如利多群岛(意大利东北部旅游胜地)、疯马夜总会 (位于巴黎，以脱衣舞闻名)以及性感之家 like the Lido and the Crazy Horse and Le Sexy.
我向你保证，你会在柏林过得很愉快 I promise you, you'll have a wonderful time in Berlin.
所以我才来啊 That's why I came.
我听说这个城市是真正的活色生香啊 I hear this is a real swinging town.
你从哪听说的？ Where did you hear that?
你没读新闻头条吗？ Don't you ever read the headlines?
每个人都说柏林是当今世界上 Everybody says Berlin's the hottest spot...
最火热的地方 in the world right now.
请您对美国军备网络 Would you care to make a short statement...
做一个简短声明如何？ for the American Forces Network?
菲丽丝，拜托！ Phyllis, please!
时间有些晚了，朋友们，晚安吧 We're a little late, folks, so good night.
这是你的行李票吗？ This your ticket?
弗里茨，去把行李拿着 Fritz, with the luggage machen.
你最好拍个电报给塔拉酒店 You'd better send a cable to Tara...
告诉他们斯嘉丽已经下飞机了 and tell them Scarlett's checked in.
别麻烦了，让他们担心去吧 Don't bother. Let them worry.
我可不是自愿进行这趟旅行的 I didn't volunteer for this trip.
他们把我放逐出来就是为了要 拆散我和朱朱 They deported me just to bust it up between me and Choo Choo.
朱朱是谁？ Who's Choo Choo?
朱朱·巴布科克 Choo Choo Babcock.
我在一个电话亭邂逅了他 I met him in a telephone booth.
我们总共43个人挤在电话亭里要打破纪录 43 of us piled inside to break the record.
我和朱朱在最底下 Choo Choo and I were on the bottom.
等我们出来的时候，我们已经私定终身了 By the time we got out, we were engaged.
这也是个纪录了，没错 That's a record, all right.
可老爸不同意这门亲事，因为朱朱的亲属 But Daddy didn't approve because Choo Choo's folks...
都是来自贫民窟的 are from the wrong side of the tracks...
老实说，我爸真是个S-N-O-B and let's face it, my daddy's an S N O B.
是什么？ A what?
- 势利小人。 - 哦 A snob. Oh.
十七岁，订婚会不会有点早？ Seventeen. Isn't that a little young to be engaged?
哦，我都订过四次婚啦 Oh, I've been engaged four times.
我家里每个女人都有点儿冲动 All the women in our family are sort of hot blooded.
我们摊上的这叫什么事啊？ What have we got here?
不管是什么，接下来两个礼拜够我们受的了 Whatever it is, it's all ours for the next two weeks.
难道这样不是好极了吗？ Isn't that marvy?
施莱默！ Schlemmer!
抱歉。我会让他们加班练习不起立的 I'm sorry. I will keep them here after hours practicing.
别管这个了 Never mind that.
我的司机今早没有来接我 My chauffeur didn't show up this morning.
弗里茨？我去看看他出什么事了 Fritz? I will find out what happened to him.
我不关心他出什么事了 I don't care what happened to him.
你去给我看看我的车出什么事了 Find out what happened to my car.
遵命！ Jawohl!
真对不起 I'm sorry.
等他们练习不起立的时候 While they are practicing not standing...
我就会练习不跺脚 I will practice not clicking my heels.
早安，英格伯格小姐 Guten Morgen, Fräulein Ingeborg.
早安 Guten Morgen.
像新鲜烘焙的祼麦粗面包的味道 Like freshly baked pumpernickel.
这是你的邮件 Here's your mail.
这是你的《华尔街日报》 Here's your "Wall Street Journal"...
这是我的辞呈 and here is my resignation.
辞呈？你在说什么呢？ Resignation? What are you talking about?
如今你不再让我加班了 Now you do not work me overtime anymore.
周末也用不到我了 You do not take advantage of me on weekends.
你也完全失去了对元音变音的兴趣 You have lost all interest in the umlaut...
所以，很显然，这里已经不需要我的服务了 so, obviously, my services are no longer required here.
你知道我这边的问题，家里来了个贵客啊 You know my problem. We have this houseguest.
你说她会在柏林待上两周 You said she would be in Berlin two weeks.
她得了德国风疹，我能怎么办？ Can I help it if she caught the German measles?
她都已经待了两个月了 She's been here now two months.
她喜欢这里啊 She likes it here.
真是个讨厌鬼，可我能怎么办呢，把她扔出去？ It's a damn nuisance, but what am I gonna do, throw her out?
她就不用回家吗？ Doesn't she have to go home?
现在都八月份了，学校都不开课的吗？ It's August. Won't schools soon open?
乔治亚州的学校？那可说不准了 In Georgia? You never know.
拜托，你在胡说什么辞职？ Come on. What is this nonsense about quitting?
我已经接到了很多公司的邀请。 毕竟，我会两种语言呢 I have had offers for many jobs. After all, I'm bilingual.
我知道啊 Don't I know it.
还记得那个俄国贸易委员会吗？ Remember that Russian Trade Commission?
他们一天到晚给我打电话 They keep calling me all the time.
想要我想疯了 They want me very badly.
我敢打赌，那些个西伯利亚人都是老色鬼 I'll bet, those Siberian wolves.
所以你还是再找一个小蜜吧 So you better find yourself another girl.
好吧！ All right!
我说你写 Dictation.
刊登在柏林各大报纸的分类广告上 Classified ad to run in all Berlin papers.
引号里内容 Quote...
魅力无穷的中年经理 "Attractive middle aged executive...
特聘一位魅力无穷的年轻女秘书 "wants attractive, young secretary.
要求业务多面且有合作精神 "Must be versatile and cooperative.
薪水可观，工作条件舒适 "Excellent salary, congenial working conditions...
还有额外福利 "fringe benefits."
额外福利？是什么？ Fringe benefits? What is that?
一点小小的福利。比如，今天早上 Little extras. For instance, this morning...
当我经过选帝侯大街的那家精品店时 I was passing that fancy shop on the kurfuerstendamm...
看到橱窗里有一条白丝裙 and there was this white silk dress in the window...
上面有圆点花缀，外带配搭一顶帽子 with polka dots all over it and a matching hat.
还配一个包包？还有鞋对吗？ And a bag? And matching shoes?
可不是嘛 Why not?
这工作我接了 I'll take the job.
你被录取了 You got it.
非常感谢 Danke schön.
不必客气 You're welcome schön.
拜托，把口香糖拿出来 Please. Not while you're chewing gum.
就这些了，英格伯格小姐 That'll be all, Fräulein Ingeborg.
- 有问题再叫你。 - 随时恭候 More later. Anytime.
什么事，施莱默？ Yes, Schlemmer?
我给车库打了电话，还打给了他老婆 I called the garage. I called his wife.
他们都没看到弗里茨 No Fritz.
我感觉今天会很倒霉 I can see this is going to be one of those days.
你最好报警吧 You better call the police.
我已经报了 I already did.
给他们完整的描述了那辆车 Gave them a complete description of the car
型号，车牌号，发动机编号 model, license number, engine number.
你真是个大好人，施莱默 You're a good man, Schlemmer.
谢谢，先生 Thank you, sir.
施莱默，你领多少薪水？ Schlemmer, how much are we paying you?
一周200马克 Two hundred marks a week.
我算算啊，大概是50美元吧 Let's see. That would be about fifty dollars.
- 没错。 - 你出去吧 That's all. That's enough.
是的，先生 Yes, sir.
喂喂喂？ Hello? Hello? Yes?
乔治亚州亚特兰大打来的？接进来 Atlanta, Georgia? Put it through.
麦克纳马拉，柏林那边怎么搞的？ MacNamara, what's going on there in Berlin?
我收到一封斯嘉丽的来信 I have a letter here from Scarlett.
说她去了歌剧、音乐会、博物馆 It says she's been going to operas, concerts, museums.
听起来不像是我的小丫头会做的事啊 That doesn't sound like my little girl.
你要大吃一惊了，哈泽汀先生 You're going to be surprised, Mr. Hazeltine.
她如今像换了一个人似的 She's a different person now.
我不介意告诉您 I don't mind telling you.
当她刚来的时候我们有点儿担心呢 We were a little worried when she first arrived...
结果她非常好 but she turned out just fine.
哦，真见鬼了！ Well, I'll be damned!
总之，有件事会让你宽心 Anyway, you'll be relieved to know...
那就是我和我太太今天将启程前往欧洲 that Mrs. Hazeltine and I are leaving for Europe today...
我们会把斯嘉丽从你手中接过来 and we're going to take Scarlett off your hands.
失去她我们会很难过 We'll be sorry to lose her.
不过，也没什么好烦恼的 No, it was no bother at all.
两星期，两个月，有什么区别呢？ Two weeks, two months. What's the difference?
哦，我想让你知道 Well, I want you to know...
我们非常感激你，麦克纳马拉 that we're mighty grateful to you, MacNamara.
事实上，我出这趟远门的原因是 Actually, the reason I'm making this trip
将进行一次人事变动 there's gonna be a shift in personnel.
我们将任命一位新的欧洲运营总经理 We're naming a new head of European operations...
可不会忘了你哦，麦克 and you won't be forgotten, Mac.
是要去伦敦工作吗？ The London job?
哦，我都不知道怎么说才好 Well, I don't know what to say.
我从未想过会得到那样的职位 I never expected anything like that.
担任现在的职位已经是莫大的荣耀 Just to be considered for the job is a great honor.
当然了，我在公司已经 Of course, I have been with the company...
工作了十五个年头了 for the past fifteen years...
我对欧洲的市场了如指掌 and I know the European market like the inside of my pocket
您的太太打来找您 It's your wife on the other phone.
她坚持要和您说话 She must talk to you.
现在不行，我在打长途呢 Not now. I'm on long distance.
我跟她说了，但她还是坚持 I told her that, but she insists.
请您稍候一下好吗，哈泽汀先生？ Would you hold on a minute, Mr. Hazeltine?
会计部出了点儿紧急状况 There's a little emergency in the accounting department.
怎么了，菲丽丝？有什么要紧事？ What is it, Phyllis? What's so important?
哦，如果你要这么说，真没什么事 Well, if you put it that way, nothing, really.
我只是在想你也许会对 I just thought you might be interested...
家里现在发生的事情感兴趣，我的领导 in what's going on around the house, mein Führer.
你疯了吗？ You out of your mind?
我正在跟哈泽汀先生谈到伦敦工作的事情 I'm talking to Mr. Hazeltine about the London job...
而你只想跟我闲聊？ and you want to chitchat?
真不好意思，只不过哈泽汀小姐失踪了 I'm sorry. It's just that Miss Hazeltine is missing...
不过我们可以改天再说这件事 but we can discuss it some other time.
- 再见 - 再见 Bye. Bye.
失踪？！等一下，菲丽丝 Missing?! Wait a minute, Phyllis.
菲丽丝！ Phyllis!
你说她失踪了是什么意思？ What do you mean she's missing?
柏莎把早餐送上楼，发现她不在房里 Bertha took her breakfast up, and she's not there.
她的床铺没人睡过 Her bed hasn't been slept in.
呃，这太荒唐了 Well, that's ridiculous.
我们11点左右看完电影回来 We got back from the movie around 11:00...
斯嘉丽就直接上楼去了 and Scarlett went right upstairs.
她能出什么事呢？ What could have happened to her?
谁知道呢，随风而逝了吧 （注：这里是在开《乱世佳人》的玩笑） Who knows? Gone with the wind.
也许她逃跑了 Maybe she ran away.
也许她被贩卖白人奴隶团伙绑架了 Maybe she was kidnapped by a white slave ring.
哦，说得真好。你等一下好吗？ Oh, swell. Hold on, will you?
有麻烦了？ Trouble?
我宁可下地狱被腰斩还好过一点 I wish I were in hell with my back broken.
真抱歉，哈泽汀先生 Sorry, Mr. Hazeltine.
大家都有问题来找我了 They come running to me with all their little problems.
您的行程安排，打算乘什么船过来？ About your trip. What boat are you sailing on?
船？那多慢啊？ Boat? Who's got time for that?
我和夫人 Mrs. Hazeltine and I...
打算今天下午飞去纽约 are flying to New York this afternoon...
然后乘夜航喷气式飞机去伦敦 taking the overnight jet to London.
再转机去柏林 There's a connecting flight to Berlin...
明天中午就能到你那儿了 and we'll be there at noon tomorrow.
明天中午？您是指我们这里的时间吗？ Noon tomorrow? You mean our time?
当然我会告诉斯嘉丽的，一闲下来我就跟她说 Of course I'll tell Scarlett, first chance I get.
是的，先生 Yes, sir.
我们会去机场接您们，除非那些该死的共产党 We'll see you at the airport unless those damn Commies...
把飞机打下来 shoot the plane down.
好的，再见 Yeah. Auf Wiedersehen.
看在上帝的份上，菲丽丝，我们必须找到那个白痴 For God's sake, Phyllis, we've got to find that idiot.
她的父母明天就到 Her parents are arriving tomorrow.
她能去哪呢？ Where could she be?
在柏林除了我们她谁也不认识啊 She doesn't know anybody in Berlin except us.
对了，让柏莎再去她房间看看 Well, have Bertha look again.
也许她留了字条 Maybe she left a note.
她的行李呢？ What about her luggage?
真高兴她没把行李带走 I'm glad to hear something is still there.
不，我没怪你 No, I'm not blaming you.
只不过是我麦克纳马拉人品太低 It's just that lousy MacNamara luck.
以前是丢了一家装瓶厂 First I lost a bottling plant...
现在是把老板的女儿弄丢了！ and now I lose the boss' daughter!
我觉得事情有眉目了 I think we are getting someplace.
弗里茨出现了 We found Fritz.
弗里茨？让他见鬼去吧！ Fritz? To hell with Fritz!
我们现在要找的是那个女孩 It's the girl we're looking for now.
没错啊，他有线索 Precisely. He has some information.
她在哪？ Where is she?
我知道的不太确切 I do not know, not precisely...
不过昨晚，我载她到勃兰登堡门下车 but last night, I dropped her at the Brandenburg Gate.
勃兰登堡门？为什么？ Brandenburg Gate? Why?
她每晚都要我载她到那里 That is where I drop her every night...
然后第二天早上再去接她 and that is where I pick her up every morning.
这件事有多久了？ How long has this been going on?
上个月就开始了，先生 Since last month, sir.
通常，在您起床之前 Usually, I get her back to the house...
我会把她带到后门，但今天早上 before you wake up, but this morning...
我在那里等她，没等到 I wait for her, and I wait.
你是说，你在帮她偷偷从我身后溜走？ You mean, you've been helping her sneak out behind my back?
是的，先生，不过我有个很好的理由 Yes, sir, but I have a very good excuse.
什么？ What?
她每晚付给我100马克 She pays me a hundred marks a night
50块是车钱，还有50块是让我不告诉你 fifty for driving her, fifty for not telling you.
请允许我炒掉他好吗？ Do I have your permission to fire him?
现在还不行！ Not yet!
现在，我们一步一步来 Now, let's go step by step.
你让她在勃兰登堡门下车之后 After you drop her at the Brandenburg Gate...
她做了什么？ what does she do?
她越过边界进入东柏林 She crosses the border into East Berlin.
东柏林？ East Berlin?
所以我才担心啊 That is why I am so worried...
因为今天早上她没有回来 because this morning, she did not come back.
你担心？ You're worried?
我就要引火烧身了，他竟然还只是在担心 I'm going down in flames, and he's worried.
英格伯格，去操作总机 Ingeborg, clear the switchboard.
给我接美国部门的指挥官 I want Brigadier General Hartel...
哈特尔准将 Commanding Officer of the American sector.
然后接维利·勃兰特市长 Next, get me Mayor Willy Brandt.
然后接西柏林的 Next, get me the Police Commissioner...
警署总督 of West Berlin.
然后再接伯恩(西德临时首都)的美国大使 Next, I want to speak to the U.S. Ambassador in Bonn.
记住了吗？很好 You got that? Ok.
弗里茨，你去楼下等着，我待会还需要你 Fritz, you wait downstairs. I may need you later.
施莱默，我们怎么才能查到她发生什么事了呢？ Schlemmer, how can we find out what happened to her?
我们能从东柏林那边得到什么消息吗？ Can we get any information from East Berlin?
只能通过一式三份的官方渠道 Only through official channels in triplicate.
如果我们这就拿起电话 What if we just picked up the phone...
打给那边的当局怎么样？ and called the authorities over there?
- 没那么简单。 - 为什么？ It is not that easy. Why not?
从这里到东柏林不通电话 There's no direct phone service to East Berlin.
您得先打到斯德哥尔摩 You have to call Stockholm.
然后转到华沙 From there it goes through Warsaw...
再到莱比锡，然后才能转到东柏林 to Leipzig, then to East Berlin.
不过十有八九会打错 Nine times out of ten, you get the wrong number.
- 无论如何都试一下。 - 是的，先生 Try it anyway. Yes, sir.
傻瓜！ Schnellmachen!
喂？ Yes?
哈特尔准将去军事演习了？ General Hartel is out on army maneuvers?
维利·勃兰特市长呢？ Well, what about Mayor Willy Brandt?
他在观看演习啊 He's watching the maneuvers.
警署总督呢？ And the Police Commissioner?
我知道了，他在监视维利·勃兰特 I see. He's watching Willy Brandt.
那警察局谁管？ So who's minding the store?
打到伯恩那边去了吗？ What about the call to Bonn?
大使回华盛顿参加咨询会去了？ Our ambassador is back in Washington for consulation?
进来，进来，我等会跟你说 Come in, come in. I'll be right with you.
打到华盛顿的国务院去 Get me Washington, the State Department...
谁接都行 whoever answers
迪安·拉斯克，迪安·艾奇逊， 是个叫迪安的都行 Dean Rusk, Dean Acheson, Dean anybody.
如果那边也没人接 And if you have no luck there...
就打给乔治亚州的塔尔马吉参议员 get me Senator Talmadge of Georgia.
如果他也不在，就试试打给国家广播公司的 亨特利和布林克利 If he isn't in, try Huntley and Brinkley at NBC.
斯嘉丽！ Scarlett!
你这么激动干嘛？ What's all the excitement?
哦，没事 Oh, nothing.
你刚才把我们都吓死了！ You just scared the hell out of us!
你还好吗？ You all right?
我好极了 I'm just marvy.
你去东柏林干什么了？ What were you doing in East Berlin?
你是说昨晚？ You mean, last night?
我是问这些天你都在干嘛 I mean all those nights.
那边有个男孩 There's this boy over there.
哇喔！ Wow!
什么男孩？你都去干什么了？ What boy? What have you been up to?
我六周前认识了他 I met him about six weeks ago.
当时我去东柏林，那边正在游行 I went into East Berlin, and there was this parade...
然后他们要逮捕我 and they wanted to arrest me.
逮捕你？ Arrest you?
因为我在拍照 Because I was taking pictures.
然后这个男孩就在游行队伍里 And then this boy he was in the parade
他跟警察说我不应该被逮捕 he said to the policemen I shouldn't be arrested.
而应该为我感到遗憾，因为我是一个 典型的中产阶级寄生虫 I should be pitied because I was a typical bourgeois parasite...
是堕落文明结出的烂果子 and the rotten fruit of a corrupt civilization.
所以很自然的，我就爱上他了 So naturally, I fell in love with him.
真是太自然了 Naturally.
想看看他的照片吗？ Want to see his picture?
不是很想看 Not particularly.
你可要说实话 I want your honest opinion.
他难道不帅吗？ Isn't he beautiful?
你爱上了赫鲁晓夫？ You fell in love with khrushchev?
不是，笨蛋，是举着赫鲁晓夫的那个 No, silly, the one that's carrying khrushchev.
他叫奥托 His name's Otto.
我终于把电话接进了东柏林 I finally got East Berlin on the phone...
如我所言，号码是错的 and just like I told you, wrong number.
您好 Hi there.
好吧，你和这个叫奥托的 Now, you and this Otto...
在一起的时候都干些什么？ exactly what do you do when you're together?
各种甜蜜的事情啊 All kinds of goodies.
我帮他洗衬衫，他令我开拓眼界 I wash his shirts, and he broadens my mind...
如果是暖和的夜晚，我们就躺在屋顶上 and if it's a warm night, we go lie on the roof...
看着苏联的人造卫星飞来飞去 and watch the Sputniks go by.
就这些？ Is that all?
哦，昨晚我们在吹气球 Well, last night, we were blowing up balloons.
气球？ Balloons?
你知道的 You know.
那是共产党员的诡计！ It's a Communist trick!
当风向合适的时候，他们把气球放飞过来 When the wind is right, they float them across...
以消磨我们的斗志 to undermine our morale.
“美国佬滚蛋”？ "Yankee go home"?
气球五颜六色，绿的、黄的、蓝的都有 They come in all colors green and yellow and blue.
你一直在帮这个家伙 You've been helping this guy to spread...
宣传反对美国人？ anti American propaganda?
不是反对美国人，是反对美国佬 It's not anti American. It's anti Yankee.
我去的那边，每个人都在反对美国佬 Where I come from, everybody's against the Yankees.
我很想把上面的字换成“俄国佬滚蛋” I have good mind to change this to "Russki go home"...
等风向调转时让它们飞回去 and when the wind blows the other way
听我说，斯嘉丽·哈泽汀 You listen to me, Scarlett Hazeltine.
以后不会再有这些蠢事了 There's gonna be no more of this foolishness...
因为明天，你父母就要来接你回家了 because tomorrow, your parents are coming to take you home.
是吗？ They are?
谁？切特·亨特利？ Who? Chet Huntley?
好吧，我来跟他说 All right. I'll speak to him.
您好，亨特利先生 Hello, Mr. Huntley.
我只是想告诉您我正在收看您的节目 I just want to tell you I've been watching your program.
请继续保持高水平。再见！ Keep up the good work. Bye!
等你父母来了 When your parents arrive...
我希望你管好自己的嘴巴 I want you to keep your mouth shut...
为了你好，也为了我好 for your sake and mine.
如果他们知道发生了什么事情... If they ever find out what's been going on
我最好还是跟奥托谈谈这件事 I better talk this over with Otto.
哦，不行，你不能去！ Oh, no, you don't!
你不能再见他 You're not gonna see him again...
不能再回东柏林 and you're not going back to East Berlin.
他就在楼下呢 He's right downstairs.
奥托！ Otto!
奥托，亲爱的！ Otto, darling!
我在这里 Up here.
上来啊，甜心 Come on up, Liebchen.
甜心？ Liebchen?
我可不想让那个怪家伙进我的办公室 I don't want that creep in my office.
你为什么不让他回家打扫打扫自己的笼子呢？ Why don't you send him home to clean out his cage?
我觉得最好让他进来 I think he better be here...
因为我们有件事要告诉你 because we have something to tell you.
什么事？ Tell me what?
你不会又订婚了吧？ You're not engaged again, are you?
不，这次没有 No, not this time.
- 谢天谢地。 - 我们结婚了 Thank God. We're married.
等一下，我担心... For a minute there, I was afraid
你们结婚了？ You're married?
到礼拜一就结婚六周了 It will be six weeks on Monday.
你嫁给了一个共产党员？ You married a Communist?
他不是共产党员，他是个共和主义者 He's not a Communist. He's a republican.
他来自东德共和国 He comes from the Republic of East Germany.
哎呀，你这个呆头呆脑的小傻瓜！ Why, you dumb, stupid little pot!
你知道自己做了什么吗？ Do you realize what you've done?
你毁了我，就是这样 You've ruined me, that's all.
你父母会说什么呢？ What are your parents going to say?
他们信任我，我也信任你 They trusted me, and I trusted you.
你却找了这样一个白痴小矮人来拉郎配 Then you go and pull an idiotic stunt like this.
那你为什么不看好我呢？ Why didn't you look after me better?
十五年的辛勤工作付之一炬啊 Fifteen years with the company down the drain.
我会被拉进黑名单 I'll be blacklisted.
我的孩子要忍饥挨饿 My kids will starve.
我的老婆要去卖铅笔！ My wife will be selling pencils!
全都因为你和你的神经大条 And all on account of you and your hot blood.
进来，进来啊，奥托 Come in. Come in, Otto.
这位是麦克纳马拉先生 This is Mr. MacNamara.
这是我老公奥托·路德维格·皮弗尔 My husband Otto Ludwig Piffl.
皮弗尔？真有你的 Piffl? Wouldn't you know.
你是从哪里把他挖出来的？ Where did you dig him up?
他连袜子都没穿 He doesn't even wear socks.
他也没穿内裤 He doesn't wear shorts, either.
这难道不是很令人兴奋吗？ Isn't that exciting?
把你的帽子脱掉 Take your cap off.
为什么？ Why?
因为我说了算 Because I said so.
在列宁的墓地里，我会脱帽 In Lenin's tomb, I take my cap off.
如果范·克莱本演奏柴可夫斯基 If Van Cliburn plays Tchaikovsky...
我会脱帽 I take my cap off...
可是在可口可乐公司的办公室里，我呸！ but in Coca Cola office, phooey!
为我脱帽吧，亲爱的 Do it for me, you little darling.
为了你，我脱帽 For you, I do it.
他该去理发了 He could use a haircut...
我很乐意向他提供 and I'd like to give it to him myself...
锤子和镰刀(前苏联国旗图案) with a hammer and sickle.
战争贩子 Warmonger.
住口，小流氓 Shut up, you punk.
你不准这么跟我老公说话 Don't you talk like that to my husband.
他不是你老公！ He's not your husband!
首先，她还未成年 In the first place, she's underage.
其次，我们不承认东德政府 Next, we don't recognize the government of East Germany.
再次，她承认当她为你洗衬衫时 Next, she admits that while she was washing your shirts...
你在给她洗脑！ you were washing her brain!
所以整件事情是不合法的 So the whole thing is illegal.
不，不是这样的。我有结婚证书 No, it's not. I have a certificate.
告诉他我们婚戒的质地 And tell him about the wedding rings.
由曾在斯大林格勒战斗过的勇敢的大炮上的 Forged from the steel of a brave cannon...
钢铁铸造而成 that fought at Stalingrad.
我才不管你们的珠宝商是谁！ I don't care who your jeweler is!
这个婚姻是非法的 The marriage is illegal.
随你怎么说，可是在 You say, but in the eyes...
东德人民共和国的眼中 of the People's Republic of East Germany...
我们就是夫妻 we are husband and wife.
你现在不在东德了 You are not in East Germany now.
你现在在西柏林，我可以叫人逮捕你 You are in West Berlin, and I can have you arrested...
罪名是和未成年少女一起躺在屋顶上 for lying on rooftops with a minor.
你当然可以这么做。我了解你的手段 Of course you can. I know your tactics.
你可以叫人逮捕我，你可以叫人拷打我 You can have me arrested. You can have tortured.
你还可以像在刚果所做的一样一枪打死我！ You can have me shot like you've been doing in the Congo!
非洲人民要独立！ Africa for the Africans!
斯嘉丽·皮弗尔，你能不能给我 All I want from you, Scarlett Piffl...
安静一点，少说几句那种屁话 is silence and damn little of that.
不准你这样和我的妻子说话！ Don't you talk like that to my wife!
谁？布林克利？ Who? Brinkley?
好吧，告诉他我已经都跟亨特利说了 Well, tell him I already gave the message to Huntley.
听着，奥托小宝贝 Look, Otto baby.
如果我们想和平共处的生活在一起 If we're to live together in peaceful coexistence...
就得有一定数量的平等交换 there must be a certain amount of give and take.
你觉得一千马克怎么样？ How'd you like a thousand marks?
干嘛？ For what?
你骑上摩托车，回到你来的地方 Just get on your motorcycle, go back where you came from...
忘了这整件事 and forget about the whole thing.
你不可能收买他的 You can't bribe him.
两千？ Two thousand?
五千如何？ How about five thousand?
奥托，你在说什么呢？ Otto, what are you saying?
成交，五千马克 Ok. Five thousand marks.
如果五千马克能成交，何不改为五万马克？ If it's worth five thousand, why not fifty thousand?
五万马克？你疯了吗？ Fifty thousand? You crazy?
我只想看看他们为了要拆散一个 幸福的社会主义婚姻 I just want to see how far they will go...
会不择手段到何种程度 to break up a happy Socialist marriage.
我唾弃你的金钱 I spit on your money.
我唾弃诺克斯堡(美国政府黄金储备处)！ I spit on Fort knox!
我唾弃华尔街！ I spit on Wall Street!
真是个不讲卫生的小杂种，不是吗？ Unsanitary little jerk, isn't he?
你和你的同类注定在劫难逃 You and your kind are doomed.
我们会接管西柏林 We will take over West Berlin.
我们会接管西欧 We will take over Western Europe.
我们会埋葬你们！ We will bury you!
帮帮忙吧，埋了我们，但不要跟我们结婚 Do me a favor. Bury us, but don't marry us.
看看这些铺张浪费吧 Look at all this waste.
资本主义就像月光下的一条死鲱鱼 Capitalism is like a dead herring in the moonlight.
闪闪发光，但恶臭无比！ It shines, but it stinks!
他总是这样讲话 He talks like that all the time.
跟他说说可口可乐殖民主义 Tell him about Coca Cola colonialism.
什么？ What?
赫鲁晓夫主席在 As chairman khrushchev said...
革命四十周年纪念日说过... on the 40th anniversary of the revolution
革命见鬼去吧，赫鲁晓夫见鬼去吧！ To hell with the revolution and to hell with khrushchev!
法兰克·辛纳屈(美国著名歌手和演员)见鬼去吧 The hell with Frank Sinatra.
哦，等你父母明天来了 Oh, it's gonna be a real clambake...
肯定要搞一个室外宴会 when your folks get here tomorrow.
到时候我们怎么解释这件事？ How are we gonna explain this?
那是你的问题，因为我那时就不在这里了 That's your problem because I won't be here.
你什么意思，不在这里了？ What do you mean, you won't be here?
今晚，我和我的妻子要去莫斯科 Tonight, my wife and I are leaving for Moscow.
莫斯科？ Moscow?
这就是我过来要告诉你的。他得了奖学金 That's what I came to tell you. He's got a scholarship...
是人民技术学院颁发的 to the People's Technological Institute.
他在学习成为一名导弹工程师 He's studying to be a missile engineer.
苏联的导弹 Soviet missiles
金星！ Venus!
美国的导弹 American missiles
迈阿密海滩 Miami Beach.
所以你就告诉我老爸，我在去USSR (苏维埃社会主义共和国联盟)的路上 So you just tell Daddy I'm on my way to the U.S.S.R.
那个词是俄国的缩写 That's short for Russia.
你才17岁，你疯了吗？ Are you out of your seventeen year old mind?
大家都要从俄国逃出来，你却想进去 Russia's to get out of, not to get into.
奥托去哪，我就去哪！ Where Otto goes, I go!
你试试看来阻止我们啊 You just try to stop us.
您能和您的夫人通电话吗？ Can you talk to your wife?
好吧，他俩简直不可理喻 Well, I certainly can't talk to them.
用这个电话 On this phone.
喂？是我，亲爱的 Hello? Yes, dear.
麦克，别瞎找了 Mac, hold everything.
我打赌我知道斯嘉丽干嘛去了 I bet I know what happened to Scarlett.
一定是幸运的皮埃尔回到城里来了 Lucky Pierre must be back in town.
不是幸运的皮埃尔，是疯子奥托 It's not Lucky Pierre. It's Crazy Otto.
你准备好接受真相了吗？ Are you ready for this?
她结婚了。没错 She's married. That's right.
她给自己找了一个极爱的、卷发的 She got herself an ever loving, curly haired...
拥有党员证的丈夫 card carrying husband.
她嫁给了一个共产党员？ She married a Communist?
自从舍曼将军搞了那次小型烤肉宴会之后 (指内战时期舍曼将军对亚特兰大进行的焚城) This is gonna be the biggest thing to hit Atlanta...
这将是振动亚特兰大最大的一件事了 since General Sherman threw that little barbecue.
不，我不觉得好笑 No, I don't think it's funny.
他们打算定居莫斯科？哦，这才好笑呢 They're gonna live in Moscow? Now, that's funny.
是啊，他们精神错乱了，可我能怎么办呢 Yeah, hysterical, but what can I do...
去和克里姆林宫战斗吗？ go fight the kremlin?
我没法阻止他们 I can't stop them.
他们很年轻，他们深坠爱河 They're young, they're in love...
而我们都是月光下的死鲱鱼 and we're a dead herring in the moonlight...
所以我还怎么能够阻碍一桩幸福的社会主义婚姻呢？ so who am I to stand in the way of a happy Socialist marriage?
哦，少来了，麦克。我太了解你了 Oh, come off it, Mac. I know you.
你肯定还藏了一手 You've got something up your sleeve.
知我者莫过妻。再见 I wouldn't be surprised. Bye.
好吧，你们俩几时走？ Now, what time are you kids leaving?
7点，乘莫斯科特快车 7:00 on the Moscow Express.
你为什么要知道？ Why do you want to know?
因为我打算炸毁火车 Because I'm gonna dynamite the train.
你们为什么这么多疑呢？ What makes you guys so suspicious?
我最好现在回去打包了 I better get back to the house and start packing.
你觉得我是否应该把那两件貂皮大衣都带上呢？ You think I ought to take both my mink coats?
亲爱的，女人不应该有两件貂皮大衣 Darling, no woman should have two mink coats...
除非世界上所有女人都有貂皮大衣穿 until every woman in the world has one mink coat.
你为什么不把另一件大衣剪碎， 给他做一条内裤呢？ Cut the other one up and make him a pair of shorts.
我听说那边时时刻刻都很冻 I hear it's freezing there all the time.
零下三十度 Thirty below zero.
法西斯的谎言！ Fascist lies!
你也最好回去打包了，亲爱的 You better go home and pack, too, darling.
我打包不用花多少时间的 It will take me no time.
只有棋盘，换洗衬衫，还有两百本书 Just my chessboard, my extra shirt, and two hundred books.
只要美女打算回东柏林 As long as Smiley here is going back to East Berlin...
我就去给你准备车 I'll get the car for you.
施莱默，你赶紧下楼一趟 Schlemmer, will you run downstairs...
告诉弗里茨他得送斯嘉丽回家，好吗？ and tell Fritz he'll have to take Scarlett home?
您打算放她去莫斯科？ You're letting her go to Moscow?
决不可能 In a pig's eye.
听着，他的摩托车在楼下 Now, look. His motorcycle's downstairs.
还记得你关于气球的那个主意吗？ Remember that idea you had about the balloon?
想想吧，甜心 Just think, Liebchen...
明晚，我们就会手牵手漫步 tomorrow night, we'll be strolling hand in hand...
穿过红场 across Red Square.
我希望你在你朋友面前 I hope you won't be ashamed of me...
不会因我而羞愧 in front of your friends.
当然不会啦 Of course not.
我答应你，我只在家里穿金戴银 I promise you, I'll only wear my jewelry at home.
他们已经分配给我们一间超赞的公寓 They have assigned us a magnificent apartment...
浴室离的非常近 just a short walk from the bathroom.
我爱你 I love you.
我会令你非常开心 I'll make you very happy.
每天早上，我们都会在床上吃早餐 Every morning, we'll have breakfast in bed.
听起来棒极了 Sounds wonderful.
午餐和晚餐也是 Also lunch, also dinner.
也在床上吃？ In bed?
屋里既没有桌子也没有椅子 There's no table and no chairs.
管它呢 Who cares?
我六点半准时来接你 I'll pick you at 6:30 sharp...
因为七点钟到莫斯科的火车会在 八点十五分准时开动 because the 7:00 train to Moscow leaves promptly at 8:15.
等一下，孩子们 Wait a minute, kids.
在你们走之前，我想送给你们一份小礼物 Before you go, I'd like to give you a little present.
为什么？ Why?
当有人结婚时，送礼是习俗 It's customary when two people get married.
奥托的朋友们都没送我们礼物 Otto's friends didn't give us any presents.
而是把买礼物的钱捐给了 Instead, they sent the money...
密西西比的失业采棉工人 to the unemployed cotton pickers in Mississippi.
鸡尾酒调酒壶如何？ How about a cocktail shaker?
不，我想不好 No. I guess not.
有了 I know.
布谷鸟报时钟 A cuckoo clock.
由黑森林(德国境内)中的小矮人亲手制成 Handmade by dwarfs in the Black Forest.
这么说现在他们已经开始剥削小矮人了 So now they're exploiting dwarfs.
很抱歉我这没有好看的包装纸 I'm sorry I haven't got any fancy wrapping paper.
我们不想要你的任何东西 We do not want anything from you.
奥托，别失礼 Otto, don't be rude.
我觉得麦克纳马拉先生也是一片好意 I think it's very sweet of Mr. MacNamara.
现在我们有一张床和一个钟了 Now we'll have a bed and a clock.
我们会去俄国买自己的钟 We will get our own clock in Russia.
如果那边的钟走的比火车好不到哪里去 If your clocks don't run any better than your trains...
你还是拿着这个的好 you might as well take this one.
你现在可以笑我们，但不会太久的 You laugh at us now, but not for long...
因为你自大且肥胖臃肿 because you're arrogant and fat and bloated.
蠕虫们还是去野餐吧 The worms will have a picnic.
战场上见吧，伙计 See you on the barricades, pal.
当那天来临之时，我会为你说好话的 When the day comes, I'll put in a good word for you.
斯嘉丽！ Scarlett!
我为我的父母感到难过 It's my parents I feel sorry for.
想拯救他们已经太晚了 It's too late to save them.
奥托说他们必须被清算 Otto says they'll have to be liquidated.
再见！ Bye!
施莱默！ Schlemmer!
赶紧的！ Hurry up!
再见，甜心 Wiedersehen, Liebchen.
再见 Auf Wiedersehen.
干得好，施莱默 Good boy, Schlemmer.
谢谢，先生 Yes, sir.
您还想让我做什么吗？ Anything else you wish me to do?
不用了，谢谢你 No, thanks.
现在我们只要静候 We can just sit back now...
让东德的警察们完成这项工作吧 and let the East German police finish the job.
抱歉 Pardon me.
我一定是很笨，不明白这到底是怎么一回事 I must be very stupid, but I do not understand any of this.
不要紧 There's nothing to it.
这一切只需用上一点儿物理知识 All it takes is a little knowledge of physics...
以及基本的心理学 and elementary psychology.
现在，奥托·路德维格·皮弗尔同志 Right now, Comrade Otto Ludwig Piffl...
正在驾驶着他的摩托车 is tooling along on his motorcycle...
朝东柏林驶去，心情明亮又快活 toward East Berlin, gay, chipper...
感觉好极了 feeling like a million rubles.
完全不知道与此同时后面的排气管处 Little does he know that meanwhile back at the exhaust...
废气正填满气球 the fumes are filling the balloon.
气球越鼓越大 It gets bigger and bigger...
而在侧座上 and all the time in the sidecar...
一个小小的陷阱始终存在 a little booby trap is ticking away.
嗯，如果我的计算无误 Now, if my calculations are correct...
一旦他穿过了勃兰登堡门 all these things will begin to pay off...
这一切就会开始发挥作用 once he passes through the Brandenburg Gate.
您可以通过驻莫斯科的美国运通 把我的信件转交给我 You can forward my mail care of American Express in Moscow.
还有《时尚》以及《银幕罗曼史》杂志 And "Vogue" magazine and "Screen Romances."
只要你答应我每天给我寄《真理报》就行 If you promise to send me "Pravda" every day.
我开玩笑的 Just the funnies.
他应该来了啊 He should be here by now.
现在几点了？ What time is it?
6点25，别紧张 6:25. Relax.
感激不尽，感激不尽 Danke schön, danke schön.
不用谢啦 Don't mention it.
你确定要把那件大衣留给她吗？ Are you sure you want to leave her that coat?
哦，没错 Oh, yes.
奥托认为每个女人都该有一件貂皮大衣 Otto thinks every woman should have a mink.
我支持奥托 I'm with Otto.
也许我晚上外出时她可以借给我 Maybe she'll let me borrow it on my night out.
奥托(Otto)名字倒着念还是奥托， 你发现了吗？ Do you realize that Otto spelled backwards is Otto?
那又怎样？ How about that?
你会喜欢他的 You'll like him.
他长得就像杰克·肯尼迪，只是他要年轻点 He looks just like Jack kennedy, only he's younger...
而且他在这上面还要多一点儿 and he has more upstairs.
更聪明？ More brains?
更多头发 More hair.
当然啦，在思想上，他要健全的多 And of course, ideologically, he's much sounder.
也许我们选错总统啦 Maybe we voted for the wrong man.
这在俄罗斯是不会发生的 That couldn't happen in Russia.
他们不会选错吗？ They don't make mistakes?
他们根本不能选 They don't vote.
你曾经跟革命者做过爱吗？ Have you ever made love to a revolutionary?
没有，不过我曾与一位史蒂文森(美国政客) 民主党人士接吻 No, but I once necked with a Stevenson Democrat.
呵，我都订过四次婚了，所以对男人了如指掌 We'll, I've been engaged four times, so I know about men...
还有那些颠覆分子，他们是最放荡的！ and those subversives, they're the wildest!
- 真的吗？ - 毫无争议 Really? No contest.
我只是觉得在导弹方面我们落后了 And I just thought we were lagging behind in missiles.
嘿，姑娘们，你们好吗？ 做什么菜了？ Hiya, girls. Wie gehts? Was ist cooking?
柏莎，你最好把哈泽汀小姐的行李 Bertha, you better take Miss Hazeltine's luggage...
拿回楼上去 back upstairs.
拿回楼上？她就要走了啊 Back upstairs? She's leaving.
恐怕走不掉啦 I wouldn't count on it.
波旁威士忌加苏打水，谁要？ Bourbon and soda, anyone?
他在说什么啊？ What's he talking about?
奥托随时会来接我 Otto's coming to pick me up any minute.
哦，不，他不会来了 Oh, no, he's not.
奥托自己已经被东德的警察接走啦 Otto's been picked up himself by the East German police.
警察？为什么？ Police? What for?
谁知道呢？在那边，他们把人扔进监狱 Who knows? Over there, they toss people in jail...
就好比我们扔掉用过的纸巾 like we throw away used kleenex.
- 进监狱？ - 你怎么知道的？ In jail? How do you know?
坏事传千里呀。酒够了时告诉我 Bad news travels fast. Say when.
他在哪？我必须去找他 Where is he? I must go to him.
你这样会是最坏的想法 That's the worst thing you can do.
他已经麻烦缠身了 He's in trouble enough already.
可他是我的丈夫啊，我想帮助他 But he's my husband. I want to help him.
因此我们得立刻废除你们的婚姻 That's why we have to get the marriage annulled right away.
- 废除？ - 等一等，麦克 Annulled? Now wait a minute, Mac.
听着，别的不说，如果他们发现 If on top of everything else, they find out he's married...
他娶了一个美国资本家的寄生虫般的女儿 to the parasite daughter of an American capitalist...
他们会把他关上20年的 they'll send him up for twenty years...
他将在盐矿里埋头苦干，艰难地 搬运那些沉重的袋子 slaving away in the salt mines, schlepping those heavy bags...
赤脚踩在雪地上，没任何东西可以保暖 barefoot through the snow with nothing to keep him warm...
周遭只有哥萨克骑兵的温热呼吸 but the hot breath of the Cossacks.
奥托！ Otto!
干得真漂亮，麦克 Nice work, Mac.
斯嘉丽，斯嘉丽！ Scarlett. Scarlett!
用冰试试 Try some ice.
柏莎，叫鲍尔医生来，好吗？ Bertha, call Dr. Bauer, will you?
我会去叫医生来 I will call the doctor...
不过我不会把貂皮大衣还给她的 but I will not give back the mink coat.
温度，正常 The temperature, she is normal.
脉搏 Der pulse
怎么了，医生？ What's the matter, doctor?
我已经错过了《瓦尔基里》的第一幕了 I have missed the first act of "The Valkyrie."
脉搏也正常 Der pulse is normal.
这显然是不正常的 Das ist definitely nicht normal.
我去搞定 I'll fix that.
停下来，孩子们 Cut it out, kids.
斯嘉丽生病了 Scarlett is sick.
如果她死了，我能住回我的房间吗？ If she dies, can I have my room back?
我怎么知道？我又不是律师 How would I know? I'm not a lawyer.
那是你的工作 That's your job.
我付钱给你是让你干什么的？ What am I paying you for?
你在东柏林一定有些关系 You must have some contacts in East Berlin.
不！我要的不仅仅是废除婚姻 No! I don't want the marriage just annulled.
我还要让它从记录簿里抹去 I want it wiped off the books.
我不管你怎么做 I don't care how you do it.
去收买那边的一个职员 Bribe one of the clerks over there.
销毁文件 Destroy the file.
如果你们这些家伙都能烧毁德国国会大厦 If you guys could burn down the Reichstag...
那么同样可以划根火柴烧了那 微不足道的结婚证书 you can set a match to one measly marriage certificate.
这事今晚必须搞定！ It has to be done tonight!
干杯 Cheers.
感觉很好不是吗，领导？ Feeling pretty good, aren't you, mein Führer?
不算坏 Not bad.
你陷害了那个可怜的男孩 You framed that poor boy.
当然是我干的 You bet I did.
我可不会让那个共产主义傻瓜 I'm not gonna let that Communist kook...
毁了别人的生活 ruin somebody's life.
可她是爱他的啊 But she loves him.
我不是说她，是说我！ Not her life, mine!
我为伦敦的工作已准备就绪。你想让我 煮熟的鸭子飞掉吗？ I'm all set for the London job. You want me to blow it?
我才懒得去管呢 I couldn't care less.
我受够了这整件事情 I'm fed up with this whole deal
绕着地图跳来跳去 hopping all around the map...
从巴格达跳到加拉加斯(委内瑞拉首都) 再跳到开普敦 from Baghdad to Caracas to Cape Town...
拖着孩子们到处跑 dragging our young behind us.
- 谁想要这种生活？ - 那你有什么好建议？ Who needs it? What would you suggest?
你为什么不能给自己在亚特兰大的总部找一份 Why can't you get yourself a nice, permanent job...
体面且固定的工作呢？ with the home office in Atlanta?
亚特兰大？你肯定是开玩笑吧。 那儿等于是只有薄荷朱利酒的西伯利亚 You can't be serious. That's Siberia with mint juleps.
麦克，我受够了。我要回家 Mac, I've had it. I want to go home.
给我一个好的理由 Give me one good reason.
好吧 All right.
辛迪必须去校直牙齿 Cindy has to have her teeth straightened.
汤米十岁了 Tommy is ten years old.
还从没吃过花生酱三明治 He's never had a peanut butter sandwich.
为了换换口味，我想看不是德语配音 And for a change, I'd like to see "Gunsmoke"...
也不是葡萄牙语或斯瓦希里语配音的 《荒野大镖客》(美国著名西部剧集)！ not in German or Portuguese or Swahili!
你想回家去纳税？ You want to go home and pay taxes?
我们在这里有大房子，有仆人 We've got it made big house, servants...
有豪华轿车，有丰厚的报销账单 limousine, fat expense account...
而你想要放弃这一切 and you want to give all that up...
就为了一块花生酱三明治？ for a peanut butter sandwich?
对你来说这生活是很棒。无论我们去到哪里 It's a great life for you. Everywhere we go...
你都能给自己找个友善的秘书 you find yourself some friendly secretary...
暗地里给你上语言课 who gives language lessons on the side.
这话什么意思？ What does that mean?
每当你有了一个新老师我都会知道 I can always tell when you've got a new teacher.
因为你会开始穿厚跟鞋去上班 You start wearing your elevator shoes to the office.
菲丽丝，你是在暗示什么吗？ Are you implying
我老早就知道了 I've known it for years.
可你从没说过这些？这不公平 You never said anything? That's not fair.
我只是不想变成那些唠唠叨叨的 美国妻子中的一员 I didn't want to be one of those nagging American wives.
也许我错了 Maybe I was wrong.
也许我们应该很早以前就把事情讲清楚 Maybe we should have had it out a long time ago.
医生，她怎么样？ How is she, doctor?
完全正常 Perfectly normal.
她不停地叫着一个名叫奥托的人 She keeps asking for somebody named Otto.
奥托？从没听说过 Otto? Never heard of him.
但她会好起来的吧 But she's going to be all right.
百分之百会好的 Hundert prozent.
你们会很开心，因为这位年轻的小姐... You will be happy to know that the young lady is
用英语怎么说呢？德语里说schwanger How do you say it in English? Schwanger?
schwanger？ Schwanger?
什么意思？ What's that?
你不是在学德语么 You're the one who's studying German.
schwanger，你懂的 Schwanger. You know.
我真笨啊！schwanger Such a dummkopf I am! Schwanger.
schwanger，schwanger Schwanger, schwanger.
我知道是什么意思 I know what it means.
什么？ What?
你告诉过我不要用那样的词 You told me not to use words like that.
说吧！ Come on!
你想让我说出来吗？ You want me to tell you?
拜托！ Please!
斯嘉丽要生小崽儿了 Scarlett's gonna have puppies.
什么？ What?
她怀孕了？ She's pregnant?
就是这个词，怀孕！ That is the word. Pregnant!
再见啦 Auf Wiedersehen.
schwanger意思是怀孕 Schwanger is pregnant
怀孕就是schwanger Pregnant is schwanger
慈悲的圣母啊，这就是小霸王的末日了吗？ (此句台词出自1931年美国电影《小霸王(Little Caesar)》) Mother of mercy. Is this the end of Little Rico?
好了，孩子们，回你们的房间去 All right, children, back to your room.
准备睡觉 Get ready for bed.
我在想如果你去给百事可乐工作会如何 I wonder what it's like to work for Pepsi Cola.
拜托，菲丽丝 Please, Phyllis.
那么明天，哈泽汀夫妇 So tomorrow, Mr. And Mrs. Hazeltine...
会在机场着陆 will arrive at the airport...
小斯嘉丽也会到场 and there will be little Scarlett...
没有变化，没被宠坏，没有结婚。 只不过肚子有点隆起 unchanged, unspoiled, unwed. Just slightly schwanger.
干杯 Cheers.
菲丽丝，我正在努力思考！ Phyllis, I'm trying to think!
快点思考吧，速度先生 Think fast, Mr. Moto...
因为有些问题是要被问到的 because there will be a few questions asked...
比如说，孩子的爸爸是谁？ like, for instance, who's the father?
等问的时候我就会有答案的 I'll have the answers when the time comes.
等问的时候你最好把奥托叫来 You better have Otto when the time comes.
奥托？他来了才是灾难呢！ Otto? That would be disaster!
让我想想 Let me see.
她秘密的嫁给了 She was secretly married...
一个美国大使馆的人 to somebody in the American embassy.
他们在阿尔卑斯山度蜜月 They were honeymooning in the Alps...
他因雪崩死去 and he was killed by an avalanche.
这个行不通 That's no good.
他被派到铁幕之后执行机密任务 He was sent on a secret mission behind the Iron Curtain.
再也没有音讯！ Never heard from again!
事实上，整件事都很机密 As a matter of fact, the whole thing was so secret...
我们甚至不能提及他的姓名 we can't even mention his name.
你可真能瞎掰啊 Now you're really running amuck.
你以为斯嘉丽会不反驳 You think Scarlett is going to stand still for
一个死去的英雄要比一个活着的共产党员好多了 Better a dead hero than a live Communist.
明早第一件事 First thing in the morning...
我要去弄一个杰出服务勋章来 I'll pick up a distinguished service medal.
是在他死后颁发给他的 It was awarded to him posthumously.
在那同时，你也给自己挂上一枚勋章吧 And while you're at it, pin one on yourself.
再配上一等橡树叶奖章 First class heel with oak leaf cluster.
那你要我怎么办？ What do you want me to do?
把那家伙送进监狱已经让我焦头烂额了 I had enough trouble getting the guy into jail.
再想把他弄出来要难上十倍呢！ It's gonna be ten times as tough to get him out!
施莱默！ Schlemmer!
不要跺脚 Don't click your heels.
施莱默，我今晚需要你帮忙 Schlemmer, I'm going to need you tonight.
我会在整整十分钟之后 I'll pick you up in front of your house...
去你家门口接你 in exactly ten minutes.
还有，给英格伯格打电话，告诉她 有紧急状况 Call Ingeborg. Tell her it's an emergency.
我们会在整整十二分钟之后去接她 We'll pick her up in exactly twelve minutes.
通话完毕！ Over and out!
你们要去哪？ Wo fahren Sie hin?
东柏林 Ost Berlin.
- 请出示证件。 - 美国公民 Papiere. American citizen.
你们去那边有何目的？ What is purpose of your visit?
我要去见佩里佩奇科夫委员 I'm going to see Commissar Peripetchikoff...
俄国贸易委员会主席 chairman of the Russian Trade Commission.
- 见他干嘛？ - 谈生意 What for? On business.
我是可口可乐公司的代表 I represent Coca Cola.
可口可乐公司？有证明吗？ Coca Cola? You have proof?
这个可以证明吗？ Will this do?
证明要充公 I confiscate proof.
没问题，只要你把空瓶子还给我就行 Fair enough. Just return the empties.
好的，走吧 Ok. Proceed.
如果要我说，这整个主意太疯狂了 If I may say so, this whole idea is crazy.
不会成功的，我能感觉出来 It will not work. I can feel it.
而且我很害怕 And I'm scared.
振作起来，施莱默，这是命令 Pull yourself together. That's an order.
遵命，先生 Yes, sir.
我也很害怕，不是害怕自己 I'm scared, also. Not for myself.
是害怕我的新裙子会遭什么不测 I only worry something will happen to my new dress.
我会再给你买六条裙子的 I'll buy you half a dozen dresses.
他们下榻在波坦金大饭店 They're staying at the Grand Hotel Potemkin.
你知道位置吗？ You know where that is?
知道，先生。过去那里叫做 戈林(纳粹二号头目)大饭店 It used to be the Great Hotel G鰎ing...
在那之前，它叫做俾斯麦大饭店 and before that, it was the Great Hotel Bismarck.
嘿！ Hey!
稀客呀，麦克纳马拉先生 Gaspad'n MacNamara.
这不是我的老朋友哈特、沙夫纳和卡尔·马克思嘛 If it isn't my old friend Hart, Schaffner, and karl Marx.
您还带来一位金发美女呢 I see you bring blond lady with you.
秀色可餐呀 Ring a ding ding.
请坐！请坐，我的朋友们 Sit down! Sit down, my friends.
- 一起吃吧。 - 坐这儿，小姐 - Join us. Right here, Fräulein.
我说的是卡尔·马克思，可不是 格劳乔(美国喜剧明星马克思兄弟之一)哦 I said karl Marx, not Groucho.
我们该如何感谢这意外的惊喜呢？ To what do we owe this unexpected pleasure?
你们是贸易委员会，我想我们来做交易吧 You're a trade commission. I thought we might trade.
可口可乐？ Coca Cola?
不是，不过我听说你们很想让 No, but I hear you'd like...
英格伯格小姐来为你们工作 Fräulein Ingeborg to go to work for you.
你想交易你的秘书？ You want to trade your secretary?
- 没错。 - 想换一个俄国秘书？ Right. For Russian secretary?
- 不对。 - 我不会责怪你的 Wrong. I do not blame you.
我们那个秘书就像个弯脚的俄罗斯茶壶 Ours is built like bowlegged samovar.
我们觉得这个提议非常有趣 We find proposition very interesting.
那我们能为你做什么呢？ What can we offer you?
我只要你们帮我一个小忙 All I want from you is a small favor.
小忙大忙都一样 Small favor, big favor anything.
有个叫奥托·路德维格·皮弗尔的家伙 There's a guy named Otto Ludwig Piffl.
他现在在东德警方的手中 He's being held by the East German police.
为什么？ For what reason?
那个王八蛋偷了我的布谷鸟报时钟 Son of a gun stole my cuckoo clock.
- 你想把报时钟要回来？ - 错 You want cuckoo clock back? Wrong.
- 你想把皮弗尔要回来？ - 正是 You want Piffl back? Right.
这不可能，我的朋友 Impossible, my friend.
我们不能干涉东德主权共和国的 We cannot interfere with internal affairs...
内部事务 of Sovereign Republic of East Germany.
不把皮弗尔弄来就免谈。我们走，英格伯格 No Piffl, no deal. Let's go, Ingeborg.
等等！着什么急啊？你都没给我们机会 Wait! What is the hurry? You're not giving us a chance.
俄国有句古谚说得好 Is old Russian proverb...
把手放在口袋里是不能给奶牛挤奶的 you cannot milk cow with hands in pockets.
罗伯特先生！上伏特加！上鱼子酱！ Herr Robert! Vodka! Caviar!
乐队指挥先生！ Herr kapellmeister!
再来点儿摇滚乐！ More rock'n'roll!
嘿！ Hey!
你喜欢这鱼子酱吗？ You like this caviar?
我们可以给你一百磅 We give you a hundred pounds.
我想要皮弗尔 I want Piffl.
你想要辆新汽车吗？ Would you take new automobile?
1961年产的莫斯科人金属顶盖双色敞篷车 1961 Moskvich hardtop convertible two toned.
你是说停在外面的那辆俄罗斯改装车？ You mean that Russian hot rod parked outside?
那辆车很棒，完全仿的1937年款纳什汽车 Is wonderful car. Is exact copy of 1937 Nash.
没兴趣 Not interested.
我们可以给你中国香烟 We will give you Chinese cigarettes...
亚美尼亚地毯 Armenian rugs...
保加利亚酸奶酪？ Bulgarian yogurt?
我只要皮弗尔 Piffl or nothing.
我想到了，我们有一间租借剩下的 装满午餐肉罐头的仓库 We have warehouse full of Spam left over from lend lease.
已经五点了，我们毫无进展 It's 5:00, and we're getting nowhere.
英格伯格，把鞋穿上 Ingeborg, put your shoes on.
请再等一下。最高级会议！ One more minute, please. Summit conference!
在我们达成交易之前，我们要求有验货的权利 Before we make deal, we want right of inspection.
我反对 I veto it.
我想也是 I thought so.
我们该怎么办？秘书是他的，而我们想要她 What are we going to do? He's got it, we want it.
我们要接受他敲诈般的资本主义交易吗？ Are we going to accept his blackmailing capitalistic deal?
- 我们投票吧。 - 我赞成 - 我赞成 Let us take a vote. I vote yes.
三人中有两人赞成，交易通过 Two out of three. Deal is on.
同志们，在我们惹上麻烦之前 Comrades, before we get in trouble...
我必须警告你们 I must warn you...
我并非真的来自软饮料书记处 I'm not really from Soft Drink Secretariat.
我是被派来监视你们的卧底探员 I'm undercover agent assigned to watch you.
如果是这样，我反对。交易不通过 In that case, I vote no. Deal is off.
但我赞成 But I vote yes.
三人中还是有两人赞成！交易通过 Two out of three again! Deal is on.
好啦，孩子们，脱衣准备行动 Ok, kids, strip for action.
不 Nein.
不是！ Nein!
中情局的人？ C.I.A.?
不是 Nein.
（sorry,鸟语无英字） C.I. A...
我是博洛登科 Borodenko.
美国间谍？ Amerikanischer Spion?
等一下 Moment.
你们听到了吗？ Did you hear that?
他已经招认自己是美国间谍 He is a confessed American spy.
那样的话，我就不趟这浑水了 In that case, I want nothing to do with it...
万一被莫斯科的人发现了呢 because if they ever find out in Moscow
他说得对，再美的秘书也不值得如此冒险 He's right. No secretary is worth that risk.
莫斯科的人怎么会发现呢？ Why should they find out in Moscow?
我不会向他们告密的 I will not inform them.
可是如果他们真的发现了... But if they do find out...
那我们就穿越边境去西柏林 then we just cross the border into West Berlin.
你说的倒轻巧，你还是个单身汉 That is easy for you to say. You are a bachelor.
可如果我变节了 But if I defect...
你知道他们会怎么对待我的家人吗？ you know what they will do to my family?
他们会让他们靠墙排成一排并射击 They will line them up against the wall and shoot them
我老婆，我丈母娘 my wife and my mother in law...
还有我小姨子和小舅子 and my sister in law and my brother in law.
同志们，我们上吧 Comrades, let's do it.
你骗了我们，你说他是偷报时钟的贼 You tried to bamboozle us. You say he's cuckoo clock thief.
现在我们知道了，他是美国间谍 We know he's American spy.
你最好在我们都陷入麻烦之前把他带离这里 You'd better get him out of here before we all get into trouble.
没错 Right.
很你们做生意真愉快 It's a pleasure to do business with you boys.
等一下！那个金发美女呢？ Wait! Where is blond lady?
我马上就让她过来 I'll send her right over.
可怜的小宝贝唷 You poor baby.
你摔伤了吗？我来扶你吧 Did you hurt yourself? Let me help you.
他又骗了我们 He has bamboozled us again.
那几个俄国人，我希望他们不会太失望 Those Russians, I hope they were not too disappointed.
那是他们的问题 That's their problem.
实际上，他们非常可爱 Actually, they were very cute.
我也说不好我最喜欢哪一个 I can't decide which one I liked best...
是那个胖胖的大家伙，或是那个秃子 the big fat one or the bald one.
那是施莱默的问题 That's Schlemmer's problem.
弗里茨，我们身后是什么？ Fritz, what's that behind us?
看起来是一辆1937年款纳什汽车 Looks like a 1937 Nash.
好吧，加大油门 Ok. Step on it.
停！ Halt!
你记得我们，我们早先经过这里的 You remember us. We came through earlier.
你等一下 You wait.
空瓶子给你 Here is empties.
快走，弗里茨 Let's go, Fritz.
(唱)我爱北京天安门 天安门上太阳升 Itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikini
去死吧 Drop dead.
够了，英格伯格。别哼哼了！ That's enough, Ingeborg. Cut it out!
你今早怎么这么不友好呢？ Why are you so unfriendly this morning?
我觉得一切都好极了 I thought everything was wunderbar.
某些事是好极了 Some wunderbar.
你能想象当哈泽汀夫妇中午下飞机 Can you imagine what's going to happen at noon...
仔细打量着他们的新女婿时 when the Hazeltines step off that plane...
会发生什么吗？ and get a load of their new son in law?
该死的懒汉 You slob.
而当他张开他那又大又肥的血盆大口时 And when he opens his big fat red mouth...
查理就要拜拜了 it's good bye, Charlie.
查理是谁？ Who is Charlie?
查尔斯·H·卡普特 Charles H. Kaput.
斯嘉丽在搞什么呢？她应该来了啊 What's keeping Scarlett? I wish she'd get here.
我希望施莱默能回来 I wish Schlemmer would get here
或者不论如何，把我的裙子送回来 or anyway, send my dress back.
你想在奶油里加什么？糖？ What do you want in this cream, sugar?
加几块苯丙胺(振奋精神之用)就行 Just a couple of lumps of Benzedrine.
今天会很难熬 It's going to be a rough day.
你得穿件衣服 You'd better put something on.
都起鸡皮疙瘩了 Your goose pimples are showing.
哦，这没什么。你应该看看我姐姐 Ooh, that's nothing. You should see my sister.
他人在哪？ Where is he?
在那个疯子醒来之前，我必须跟你谈谈 Before that maniac wakes up, I've got to talk to you.
要了结这场混乱只有一个方法 There's only one way out of this mess.
奥托，奥托，亲爱的 Otto. Otto, darling.
奥托是我，斯嘉丽 Otto, it's me Scarlett.
奥托，奥托，亲爱的，快醒醒 Otto. Otto, darling, wake up.
- 奥托 - 斯嘉丽？ Otto. Scarlett?
亲爱的，我有件激动人心的事要告诉你 Darling, I have something very exciting to tell you.
我怎么会在这里？ How did I get here?
是你！ You!
我应该把那个结婚礼物拿起来 I should take that wedding present...
在你头上砸烂它 and break it over your head.
我费了老大劲儿把你从监狱里救出来 That's gratitude after all the trouble I went through...
你就这样感谢我啊 to get you out of jail.
- 是你让我进监狱的！ - 那我们扯平了 You got me into jail! So we're even.
你知道吗，昨天当你没有出现时，我晕倒了 You know, yesterday, when you didn't show up, I fainted.
这全是他的错 It's all his fault.
哦，不全是 Well, not entirely.
你不想听听医生怎么说吗？ Don't you want to hear what the doctor said?
给他倒杯咖啡，他会想喝的 Get him some coffee. He's gonna need it.
只要是你给的，我什么都不要 From you, I don't need anything.
我要生小孩了 I'm gonna have a baby.
如果我妻子不在这里 If my wife wasn't here...
如果她没有要生小孩... and if she wasn't gonna have a baby...
- 什么？ - 没错 What? That's right.
甜心！ Liebchen!
世界正需要另一个吵闹的布尔什维克婴儿 Just what the world needs another bouncing baby Bolshevik.
我还怕你不想要他呢 I was so afraid you wouldn't want it.
小傻瓜，我想要一打！ You little fool. I want dozens!
我也是 So do I.
共产党也是，他们鼓励多生 So does the Party. They encourage it.
我们要孕育新的西方世界！ We must out produce the West!
我听说他们有了一个新计划 I hear they got a new plan now.
不让一个女人怀胎九月生下小孩 Instead of one woman taking nine months to have a baby...
而是让九个女人同时作业 they're gonna put nine women to work on it...
这样一个月就能生一个 and do it in one month.
等我们到了莫斯科 The minute we arrive in Moscow...
我们必须去人民产科病房 we must get on the waiting list...
和人民产科医师那里 for the People's Maternity Ward...
登记到等候名单上 and the People's Obstetrician.
不，我想让我的私人医生从亚特兰大飞过来 No. I'd like to fly over my own doctor from Atlanta...
还有我的私人护士和女家庭教师 and my own nurse and my governess.
何必呢？ What for?
国家会照料一切的！ The State takes care of everything!
婴儿六个月大的时候，就会 At the age of six months, the baby will be enrolled...
去上人民幼儿园 in the People's Nursery School.
事实上，我们每隔一个周日就能去看他 We will have visiting rights every other Sunday.
每隔一个周日？ Every other Sunday?
你可以给他带食物，里面夹着文件 You can bring him some pabulum with a file in it.
帝国主义的傀儡！ Imperialist stooge!
当然啦，五一劳动节我们还可以见他 And of course, we'll see him on May Day.
他将随着游行队伍前进 He'll be marching by in the parade.
我们可以向他挥手 We can wave to him.
在列宁生日以及尤里·加加林生日时 You can also wave to him on Lenin's birthday...
你也可以向他挥手 and on Yuri Gagarin's birthday.
这孩子会一直在游行的 That kid will be parading all the time.
至少这样可以让他远离街道 Well, at least it'll keep him off the streets.
票，我们的车票呢？ The tickets. Where are the tickets?
我们必须弄清下一班去莫斯科的车 是什么时候 We must find out when the next train leaves for Moscow.
忘了它吧，皮弗尔。你不能去莫斯科了 Forget it, Piffl. You're not going to Moscow.
甚至连东柏林都回不去 You can't even get back to East Berlin.
为什么？ Why not?
因为你是一名美国间谍 Because you're an American spy.
谁说的？ Who said so?
你自己说的 You did.
你不记得昨晚在警察局发生的事了吗？ Don't you remember last night at the police station?
你已经签字招供自己是美国间谍 You signed a confession an amerikanischer Spion.
不是的 Nein.
是的！ Ja!
这不是很刺激吗？ Isn't that thrilling?
亲爱的，你怎么不告诉我呢？ Darling, why didn't you tell me?
可我 But I'm
我不是间谍！这是假的！ I'm not a spy! It's not true!
你是这么想的 Makes you think, doesn't it...
可他们已经拿到供词了不是吗？ about all those other confessions they get?
要是再用上一小时，他们就能让你 Another hour, and they'd have had you...
招认自己参加了老挝的细菌战 confessing to germ warfare in Laos.
这是你造成的 You did this to me.
你是说是我对你严刑逼供的吗？ You mean I gave you the third degree?
或者是你那些共产党密友们做的？ Or was it your Communist chums?
你要跟我一起过去 You will come with me.
你要告诉他们这是个骗局 You will tell them it was a trick.
你开玩笑呢？你觉得他们会相信我这个 帝国主义的傀儡吗？ You think they'd believe me, an imperialist stooge?
我要杀了你！ I shall kill you!
放轻松，孩子，不然你最终会被送进 Take it easy, kid, or you'll wind up...
人民急救医院 in the People's Emergency Hospital.
奥托，亲爱的，我们给孩子取什么名字好？ Otto, darling, what are we gonna call the baby?
我的裙子！你对我的裙子做了什么？ My dress! What did you do to my dress?
施莱默 Schlemmer.
在，先生 Yes, sir.
很抱歉我今早没刮胡子 I'm sorry I didn't shave this morning.
看看我的裙子呀，全毁了 Look at my dress. It's ruined.
你离开东柏林时遇到麻烦了没有？ You have any trouble getting out of East Berlin?
没有，不过我回到西柏林时碰上点儿小麻烦 No, but I had a little trouble in West Berlin.
我搭上了一个美国士兵的吉普车 I was picked up by an American soldier in a Jeep.
他非常无礼 He was very fresh
想给拍照还要把照片登在一本叫什么 《花花公子》的杂志上 wanted to take my picture for something called "Playboy"?
快拖了这傻不拉叽的衣服，我们还有 一大堆工作要做 Get out of those silly clothes. We've got a lot of work to do.
是的，先生。我的西服在哪 Yes, sir. If I can have my suit.
在你的办公室里 It's in your office.
而且购物会很有乐趣的 And it's gonna be such fun shopping.
我们需要一个摇篮车，一张婴儿床， 一套婴儿服 We need a bassinet and a crib and a layette...
我们还得去巴黎待几天 and we have to run down to Paris for a few days.
那里有卖超棒的孕妇装 They have some marvy maternity clothes...
在克里斯汀·迪奥专卖店里 at Christian Dior's.
亲爱的，你得忘了这一切 Darling, you have to forget all that.
我们连婴儿的奶粉钱都出不起 We can't even afford milk for the baby.
医学上有一套全新的理论 The doctors have a whole new theory.
认为牛奶是婴儿最坏的食物 Milk's the worst thing for babies.
斯嘉丽，你还不明白吗？ Scarlett, don't you understand?
我完蛋了，毁了，出局了 I am through, finished, ausgespielt.
在共产党员眼中，我是个美国间谍 To the Communists, I'm an American spy.
在美国人眼中，我是个共产党员 To the Americans, I'm a Communist.
我什么也没有，没有家，没有工作 I have nothing no home, no job...
连摩托车也没了 not even my motorcycle.
真是艰苦啊。你仅有一位富二代妻子了 That's tough. All you got is a rich wife.
他说得对。等到1月份，我满18岁的时候 He's right. In January, when I'm eighteen...
爸爸会给我1万股的可口可乐公司股票 Daddy's giving me ten thousand shares of Coca Cola stock.
我是个工人，不是小白脸！ I'm a worker, not a gigolo!
我不会要你的钱的 I will not take any money from you.
你当然不会！ You bet you won't!
因为当你父亲发现你嫁给了谁的时候 Because when your father finds out who you married...
他会跟你一刀两断，一分钱都不会给你 he'll cut you off without a red cent.
请原谅我这种表达方式 You should pardon the expression.
我猜也是 I guess so.
每当我点带有俄式沙拉酱的东西时 Daddy has a fit every time I order anything...
爸爸总会大发雷霆 with Russian dressing.
看上去很糟糕，不是吗？ Looks bad, doesn't it?
但好消息是我喜欢你们这两个孩子 But it's a good thing I like you kids.
我会帮助你们 I'm gonna help you...
如果这位白痴男孩合作的话 if idiot boy here will cooperate.
你去死吧！ You go to hell!
长途电话 Long distance.
哈泽汀先生从伦敦打来的 Mr. Hazeltine calling from London.
伦敦？猎犬正在逼近我们了 London? The bloodhounds are closing in.
喂？您好，哈泽汀先生。我是麦克纳马拉 Hello? Yes, Mr. Hazeltine. This is MacNamara.
麦克纳马拉，我要砍了你的脑袋 MacNamara, I'm gonna have your head for this.
你说什么？为什么要砍？ What do you mean, for what?
我们在伦敦机场下飞机 We get off at the London airport...
准备换乘飞机 to change planes...
这里有份给我的电报 and there's this telegram waiting for me.
“恭喜您，您就要当爷爷了 "Congratulations. You're going to be a grandfather.
签名，麦克纳马拉。” 这是你想出来的笑话吗？ Signed, MacNamara." Is this your idea of a joke?
不，这不是我想的笑话 No, it's not my idea of a joke.
有人给你父亲拍电报了吗？ Did somebody send a telegram to your father?
是的，麦克纳马拉夫人拍的 Yes, Mrs. MacNamara.
哦，是她干的啊 Oh, she did.
是的，这是真的 Yes, it's true.
我们不想让您到这儿以后 We didn't want you to be too surprised...
太过吃惊 when you got here.
麦克纳马拉，我交给你的是一个 甜美、纯洁、天真的姑娘 MacNamara, I send you a sweet, pure, innocent girl...
她还未满18岁，而... who isn't even eighteen yet, and
什么？ What?
没关系了，梅兰妮，她已经结婚了 It's all right, Melanie. She's married.
哦，谢天谢地 Oh, thank heaven.
等一下，麦克纳马拉！怎么这么快！ Wait a minute, MacNamara! Not so fast!
她到底嫁给谁了？ Just exactly who is she married to?
我并不担心这个 I wouldn't worry about it.
他是个很棒的小伙子，又帅，又有修养 He's a wonderful boy handsome, cultured...
出身欧洲的名门望族 comes from one of the best families in Europe.
您会非常喜欢他的 You'll be crazy about him.
我们会带他一起去机场 We'll bring him along to the airport with us.
一路平安 Happy landing.
施莱默！ Schlemmer!
你现在又想干什么？ What are you up to now?
都是骗人的，你没法这么容易糊弄我爸的 All those lies. You can't fool Daddy that easy.
我可没说这会很容易 I didn't say it was gonna be easy...
但我们应当试试 but we sure can try.
试什么？ Try what?
我们要把这个讨人厌的流浪汉变成 一个完美的女婿 We're gonna turn this crumb bum into a perfect son in law...
而我们还剩下整整三小时又两分钟 and we've got exactly three hours and two minutes...
来搞定这件事 to do it in.
哦，我明白了。他很聪明不是吗？ Oh, I get it. Isn't he clever?
施莱默！ Schlemmer!
我坚决拒绝！ I categorically refuse!
抱歉，先生 Sorry, sir.
那条要带真是太难脱掉了 I had difficulty getting out of the girdle.
施莱默，我要外面的所有人 Schlemmer, I want all those people out there...
停下一切事情，随时待命 to drop everything and stand by for orders.
全员警报，全体动员 General alarm, complete mobilization.
就跟过去的好时光一样。遵命，先生 Like the good old days. Yes, sir.
我不会参与这桩阴谋的 I will not be a party to this scheme.
- 那你就是不爱你的妻子。 - 我爱慕她！ If you don't love your wife. I worship her!
我愿为你做任何事，你懂的 You know there's nothing I wouldn't do for you...
可我在原则问题上不能妥协！ but I will not compromise my principles!
我也愿为你做任何事 And I'd do anything for you...
即使我们要一起挨饿 even if we had to starve together...
可我们不能让孩子挨饿啊，尤其是他刚出生！ but we can't ask the baby to starve, not at his age!
你让你妻子难过了，想想她的处境吧 You're upsetting your wife. Think of her condition.
我不要被变成一个资本家！ I will not be turned into a capitalist!
一旦你成为了一个声誉良好的女婿 Once you are a son in law in good standing...
我才不管你要干什么呢 I don't care what you do.
你可以偷了可口可乐的配方 You can steal the formula to Coca Cola...
去跟莫斯科沆瀣一气。但今天中午 and square yourself with Moscow. But at noon today...
你从外表和举止上都要像一个绅士！ you are going to look and act like a gentleman!
每个人都已各就各位，听候差遣 Everybody at their posts awaiting orders.
很好，行动起来吧。首先，去找 一个理发师和一个修甲师 Here we go. Get a barber and a manicurist...
立刻到我办公室来 up to the office.
其次，给我的律师打电话，叫他即刻赶来 Call my lawyer. I want him here immediately.
再次，我要同柏林希尔顿酒店的经理谈话 I want to speak to the manager of the Berlin Hilton.
还有，去联系那个，叫什么来着， 你知道的，就是那个潦倒的伯爵 Get ahold of what's his name that moth eaten count...
以前常常在维也纳咖啡馆旁闲荡的 that used to hang around at the Cafe Wien.
冯·德罗斯特·斯卡滕博格伯爵？ Count von Droste Schattenburg?
就是他，我要马上见他 That's the one. I want to see him right away.
- 遵命，先生！ - 叫英格伯格拿纸和本子过来 And send Ingeborg in here with pad and pencil.
- 遵命，先生！ - 立即行动，1，2，3！ Yes, sir. Schnellmachen. 1, 2, 3!
- 是！ - 很好 - Ja! All right.
接下来，我们最好开始给他洗澡 Next, we'd better start cleaning him up.
- 去那边洗。 - 我可没答应任何事！ Over there. I've agreed to nothing!
使用室内水管有悖党的路线吗？ Is it against the party line to use indoor plumbing?
来吧，亲爱的。一点都不疼的 Come on, darling. It won't hurt a bit.
就算会疼，用热水和肥皂不就行了 Even if it hurts, mit the hot water mit the soap.
- 我来了，麦克纳马拉先生。 - 准备好了？ Yes, Mr. MacNamara. Ready?
时刻准备着 Always ready.
第一，给莱因哈特和莱因哈特 服装订制店打电话 Call Reinhardt and Reinhardt custom tailors.
叫他们把店里所有单排钮的 Have them send up everything they've got in their shop
三扣的，小翻领的衣服送来 single breasted, three buttoned, narrow lapels,
中灰色到深蓝色的，尺寸是39号的 medium gray to dark blue, size thirty nine regular.
第二，给普莱什基男装店打电话， 我想要几件衬衫 Call Pleschke the haberdasher. I want to see some shirts.
绒面呢，普通领或拉袢领， 尺寸是151/2，34号 Broadcloth, plain or tab collar, size 151/2, 34.
尼龙或棉内裤，32号 Shorts nylon or cotton, size thirty two.
法式莱尔线袜子，深色，尺寸是111/2 Socks French lisle, dark toned, size 111/2.
领带不要太宽，不要太窄，不要太花哨 Ties not too wide, not too narrow, not too fancy.
还有，睡衣，手帕 Also, pajamas, handkerchiefs...
袖扣，吊裤带，等等，等等 cuff links, suspenders, et cetera, et cetera.
第三，给霍赫施泰特鞋垫打电话。 叫他们送鞋过来 Next, call Hochstaetter's. Have them deliver shoes...
要英式或意大利式的，棕黑色，尺码是9B British or Italian models, brown and black, size 9B.
喂，弗里茨 Yes, Fritz.
不，弗里茨，我需要你 No, Fritz. I need you.
不论困还是不困，今天所有人都要工作 Sleepy or not sleepy, everybody works today.
第四，给任一个顶级帽商打电话 Next, call any first class hatter.
我要各式帽子 I want an assortment of hats
不要平顶卷边圆帽，不要提洛尔爵士帽， 尺寸是73/8 no porkpies, none of that Tyrolean jazz, size 73/8.
更正，他还要理发，尺寸应该是71/8 Correction after we cut his hair, 71/8.
第五，给唐金施拉瑟大街(柏林的主要购物街)上的 百货商店打电话 Next, call that department store on Tauenzienstrasse.
叫他们送一套匹配的男士行李箱过来 Have them bring up a matched set of men's luggage...
牛皮或猪皮的 cowhide or pigskin.
第六，给里茨珠宝商打电话 Next, call the Ritz jewelers.
我要挑金婚戒 I want to see a selection of gold wedding rings.
还要独钻订婚戒指 Also engagement rings diamond solitaire...
至少两克拉，至多四克拉 no less than two carats, no more than four.
务必让他把耳后也洗干净 Make sure he scrubs behind his ears.
第七，打电话给科特勒餐厅 Next, call k ottler's Restaurant.
叫他们准备豪华七道晚宴 Have them send up one deluxe seven course dinner...
并且布置好一整张餐桌 and one complete table setting.
第八，打电话给花店，叫他们准备一束菊花 Call a florist. Have them make a bouquet of chrysanthemums.
还有，两朵康乃馨作为胸花 Also, two boutonnieres white carnations.
有问题吗？ Any questions?
有，我能回家穿件衣服吗？ Yes. Can I go home and get some clothes?
在这种时候？ At a time like this?
不论穿衣还是没穿衣，今天所有人都要工作 Dressed or not dressed, everybody works today.
赶紧去办事吧 Now get with it.
理发 Haarschnitt.
- 修指甲？ - 不是我，是他 Manicure? Not me him.
带他到会议室去 Take him into the conference room...
把他那乱蓬蓬的头发都剪掉 and chop that mop off.
遵命 Jawohl.
再帮他修面和修甲 And give him a shave and a manicure.
遵命 Jawohl.
- 不要！ - 你说什么，不要？ No! What do you mean, no?
不要修甲 No manicure.
那是中产阶级的堕落与不安全的象征 It's a symbol of bourgeois decadence and insecurity.
哦，当然啦。在俄国，每个人都很安全 Oh, sure. In Russia, everybody is so secure...
他们会自己把指甲咬掉 they chew their nails off.
来吧，亲爱的。没人会知道的 Come on, darling. Nobody will ever know.
- 你可以戴手套。 - 手套？ You can wear gloves. Gloves?
你为什么不让我穿条纹裤呢？ Why don't you ask me to wear striped pants?
英格伯格，你给裁缝店打电话的时候 Ingeborg, when you talk to that tailor...
告诉他们我还要条纹裤 I also want some striped pants...
一件晨礼服，一件白色马甲 a morning coat, and a white waistcoat.
我已经找到了冯·德罗斯特·斯卡滕博格伯爵 I have located Count von Droste Schattenburg.
- 很好！ - 他在凯宾斯基酒店的男厕所工作 He's working the men's room at the kempinski Hotel.
他要多久才能到这里？ How soon can he get here?
哦，现在正是他每天的繁忙时段 Well, this is his busy time of the day.
他想知道您是否能前去找他 He wants to know if you can come there.
绝对不行 Absolutely not.
我会告诉他的。还有，您的律师来了 I'll tell him. And your lawyer is here.
进来，进来！ Come in!
麦克纳马拉先生，今天真是好极了不是吗？ Herr MacNamara, isn't this a glorious day?
少扯闲话了。现在你听着，齐德里茨 Cut the schmooze. Now, listen, Zeidlitz.
下面是我想你帮我做的事情 Here's what I want you to do.
已经都搞定啦，完全成功了 It has already been done. Complete success.
那位小姐已被认定未婚了 The young lady can consider herself unmarried.
- 未婚？ - 真不容易呀 Unmarried? It wasn't easy.
我想法设法把结婚证弄了出来 I managed to liberate that marriage license...
如您所吩咐的，是从东柏林的档案里弄出来的 from the files in East Berlin just like you ordered.
该死的德国人的高效率啊 It's that damned German efficiency.
这就是我现在需要的 That's all I need now
我手上有一个私生子 an illegitimate baby on my hands.
你说什么 I beg your pardon.
鞋子送来了 He's bringing the shoes.
鞋子？全部拆包，看看都有什么 Shoes? Unpack them. Let's see what you've got.
我想让你回东柏林 I want you to go back to East Berlin...
把这结婚证再放回档案里 and put that marriage license right back in the file.
如您所愿 If you say so.
首先，我想让你起草几份收养文件 First, I want you to draw up some adoption papers.
- 收养那个婴儿的？ - 不，是收养奥托·路德维格·皮弗尔 For the baby? No, for Otto Ludwig Piffl.
我们要让他被 We're going to have him adopted...
一个如假包换的有贵族血统的上流人士收养 by a real honest to goodness, blue blooded aristocrat.
- 男爵吗？ - 比那更好 A baron? Better than that.
是个在凯宾斯基的男厕所工作的人 The guy who's working in the men's room at the kempinski.
名字就先不提了，我还没跟他说 Leave the name blank. I haven't made the deal yet.
去工作吧，快去 Now get to work. In there.
接下来，鞋子。不，不行，不要带流苏的 Next, shoes. No, no. Nothing with tassels.
那双不错 Those are all right.
鳄鱼皮的？那是给乐队指挥穿的 Alligator? That's for bandleaders.
那双还不错，不错 Those are Ok. Ok.
完全不能接受，都是小孔 Totally unacceptable. Full of holes.
早上好，我是来自莱因哈特和莱因哈特 裁缝店的莱因哈特 Guten Morgen. Reinhardt from Reinhardt and Reinhardt.
等下跟你说。我要那双和那双，但不要那双 Be right with you. I'll take those and those but not those.
你都带了些什么来？ What have we got here?
最新的英国款式，都是进口的纤维织品 Latest English styles. All fabrics imported.
它们看上去更像是被驱逐出境的 They look more like they were deported.
太花哨，太不显眼。这件不错 Too loud. Too quiet. All right...
不过要把垫肩去了 but take the padding out of the shoulders.
这件也不赖。吊带在后面？ That's not bad. Belt on the back?
我觉得这得跟高排扣的鞋一起穿 I thought that went out with high buttoned shoes.
高排扣的鞋？我这有一双 High buttoned shoes? I have some right here.
无所谓，把那些东西都拿去会议室 Never mind. Take that stuff into the conference room.
我要这些衣服24小时内准备好 I want these ready in twenty four hours.
24小时？ Twenty four hours?
我要的晨礼服和条纹款呢？ Where's the morning coat and striped pants?
我的助手马上会带过来 My assistant is bringing them.
那些我要立刻合身的 Those I want fitted right away.
- 珠宝(德语里“珠宝”一词在英文中是“蠢货”之意) - 你说什么？ Schmuck. What did you say?
珠宝，珠宝 Schmuck. Jewelry.
哦，跟我来，你也过来 Oh. Come with me. You, too.
坐下 Sitzen machen.
像你这样健康、强壮的姑娘不应该剪指甲 A strong, healthy girl like you should not be cutting nails.
你应该去乌克兰收割小麦 You should be cutting wheat in the Ukraine.
两边留长一点，像萨尔·米涅奥(美国影星)一样 Leave it a little longer on the sides, like Sal Mineo.
选一对婚戒吧 Pick a couple of wedding rings.
请伸左脚 Left foot, please.
你喜欢这对吗？ Do you like these?
金的？永远不要 Gold? Never.
我更喜欢那最可靠的斯大林格勒 大炮上的钢铁 I prefer the honest steel of the guns of Stalingrad.
你们这些人总在喋喋不休着缴械 You guys are always yakking about disarmament.
我们不妨此时此刻就开始吧 We might as well start right here and now.
请站起来 Stand up, please.
他还会跟你一只订婚戒指 He's also giving you an engagement ring.
- 是吗？ - 我？ He is? I am?
太大了 They're too big.
我想绅士应该穿袜子 I assume the gentleman will wear socks.
如果要我说那就不穿 Not if I can help it.
- 腰围31。 - 请坐下来 Waist thirty one. Sit down, please.
我要这枚 I want this one.
- 多少钱？ - 八千马克 How much? Eight thousand marks.
谢谢你，亲爱的 Thank you, darling.
等一下！谁要为这个蠢东西买单？ Wait! Who's paying for this foolishness?
别紧张，你有可口可乐所有股份的资产 Relax. You've got assets all that Coca Cola stock.
你想要我坐拥资产并使用优惠券吗？ You expect me to sit on my assets and clip coupons?
婴儿可以使用优惠券，我们会把钱存在他名下 The baby will clip the coupons. We'll put the money in his name.
请坐下来 Sit down, please.
我不会让我的儿子成长为一个资本家的！ I will not have my son grow up to be a capitalist!
等他18岁的时候，他可以自己决定 When he's eighteen, he can decide for himself...
是想做一个资本家呢 whether he wants to be a capitalist...
还是想做一个富有的共产党员 or a rich Communist.
喂？是谁？柏林希尔顿的经理？ Yes? Who? The manager of the Berlin Hilton?
接进来 Put him on.
放那边 Over there.
喂？我要预订婚礼套房 Hello? I want to reserve the bridal suite.
是的，今天入住 Yes, checking in today.
我可没问你多少钱 I didn't ask you how much it cost.
这是给一位美国百万富翁的女婿订的 This is for the son in law of an American millionaire.
自然是双人床，丝绸床单 Double bed, naturally. Silk sheets.
告诉他们我们不需要桌椅 Tell them we don't need a table and chairs.
我们要在床上吃三餐 We're going to have all our meals in bed.
不要丝绸床单了 Never mind the silk sheets.
换成一张桌布和两张纸巾 Just make it a tablecloth and two napkins.
丝绸床单，钻戒，婚礼套房 Silk sheets, diamond rings, bridal suites.
这算什么，“甜蜜的生活”？ What is this, "La Dolce Vita"?
嘿！你们在干嘛？ Hey! What are you doing?
住手！你们疯了吗？ Stop it! Are you crazy?
男装店老板在您的办公室里 The haberdasher's in your office.
看好那个克里姆林宫来的孩子 Keep an eye on the kremlin kid.
有位《柏林日报》的记者想采访您 There's a newspaperman to see you from the "Tageblatt."
今天不行 Not today.
坐下 Sitzen machen.
不，不。只要白衬衫，给我来两打。 要双层袖口的 No, no. White shirts only. Two dozen. French cuff.
手帕，不错。袜子，很好 Handkerchiefs, Ok. Socks, fine.
如果他拒绝穿袜子，我们只得把他的双脚涂黑 If he objects, we'll just have to paint his feet black.
- 睡衣呢？ - 在这边 Where are the pajamas? Right here.
- 好吧，好吧，这是什么？ - 它们很好看 Ok. Ok. What's this? They're beautiful.
它们真糟糕，真糟糕 They are terrible. They are terrible.
给我看看领带。行，不行，行，行 Let's see the ties. Jawohl, nix, jawohl, jawohl...
绝对不行。这条是最好的 definitely nix. This is the best.
- 这是我的。 - 脱下来，我买了 It is mine. Take it off. I'm buying it.
早安，菲丽丝 Good morning, Phyllis.
这里就像梅西百货公司(美国的)的柏林分公司 Looks like the Berlin branch of Macy's Basement.
- 你不知道，这里已经乱成一锅粥了。 - 我知道这里很混乱 It's a rat race around here. And I know the rat.
这件睡袍，行还是不行？ This robe, it is jawohl or nix?
坐吧，我等会跟你说 Sit down. I'll be right with you.
不用麻烦了，我只是想拿保险柜里的东西 Don't bother. I just want something from the safe.
- 密码是多少？ - 22517 What's the combination? 22517.
好吧，把睡袍放进来 Throw that robe in...
快把这些东西拿去会议室 and start taking this stuff into the conference room.
屋里那个家伙，别告诉他那是法式双层袖口的 That guy in there, don't tell him those are French cuffs.
以阿尔及利亚的形势不能提法国 Not with the Algerian situation the way it is.
你在找什么？ What are you looking for?
- 找到了，护照。 - 护照？ Here they are. The passports. Passports?
我要飞回美国，孩子们会跟我一起走 I'm flying back to the States, and I'm taking the kids with me.
- 你要干嘛？ - 你听见我说的了 You're what? You heard me.
你现在还生什么气呢？ 我把奥托带回来了，不是吗？ What are you sore about now? I got Otto back, didn't I?
我正在改造他 I'm remodeling him.
得有人改造改造你 Somebody should do a little job on you.
再见，麦克 Good bye, Mac.
菲丽丝，你不能就这样弃我而去 Phyllis, you can't walk out on me like this.
我没有弃你而去 I'm not walking out.
我只是回到属于我的地方 I'm just going back where I belong...
如果你想加入我们 and any time you'd care to join us...
我们随时等着你 we'll be waiting for you.
收养文件，写好了 The adoption papers, they are ready.
出去 Heraus.
你是怎么了，菲丽丝？都结婚16年了... What's come over you, Phyllis? After sixteen years
也许16年之后 Maybe after sixteen years...
每段婚姻都会变得有点乏味 every marriage gets a little stale...
就如同一杯喝剩的啤酒 like a leftover glass of beer.
听着，菲丽丝，我们能不能在讨论这个问题时 Look, Phyllis, can't we discuss this problem...
不要提到竞争对手的产品？ without bringing up a rival beverage?
我希望这些预防接种证书还能用 I hope these vaccination certificates are still good.
听着，菲丽丝，当初结婚的时候 Look, Phyllis, you knew the kind of a guy I was...
你就知道我是什么样的人了 when you married me.
显然不知道 Apparently not.
我不像那些老土的小丑 I'm not one of those suburban jokers
朝九晚五的待在办公室， 下班就乘市郊往返列车回家 9:00 to 5:00 in the office, home on the commuter train...
每周末修剪草坪 cut the grass every weekend.
原来我嫁给了马可波罗啊 Turns out I married Marco Polo.
过去的16年里也不全是坏事啊 It wasn't all that bad, those sixteen years.
我们有过愉快时光 We've had some fun.
还记得辛迪在德黑兰出生时 Remember Teheran when Cindy was born...
你乘着可口可乐卡车经过12英里到达医院吗？ driving 12 miles to the hospital in a Coca Cola truck?
真是愉快啊。还记得我生汤米的时候吗？ Some fun. And remember when I had Tommy?
我怎么会忘呢，就是在苏黎世机场生产的 Do I ever. Right in the Zurich airport.
我们为了把他带过海关费了不少劲儿 We had a hell of a time getting him out of customs.
还有我们的蜜月，记得在威基基海滩(位于夏威夷) 度过的美妙一周吗？ And how about our honeymoon, that wonderful week in Waikiki?
记得啊，我在楼上往耳后喷香水 Yeah, me upstairs putting perfume behind my ears.
你在楼下开一个软饮料大会 You downstairs at a soft drink convention.
四百个男人穿着草裙跑前跑后 Four hundred men running around in grass skirts.
我当时真该用夏威夷语说“都给我滚” I should have said aloha right then and there.
好啦，乖哦，把东西给我 Now, be a good girl and give me those.
我们好好谈谈 Let's talk this over.
好吧，我愿意 All right. I'm willing.
可现在不行 But not right now.
哈泽汀夫妇中午就到 The Hazeltines will be here at noon.
时间快要没了 I've got a deadline.
你跟我的时间就要没了 You've got a deadline with me.
菲丽丝，宝贝，我爱你 Phyllis, baby, I love you.
相信我的话，一切都会好起来的 Take my word for it. Everything is going to be fine.
我们会搬到伦敦去住。汤米可以去念牛津大学 We'll be living in London. Tommy can go to Oxford.
辛迪可以去看白金汉宫的卫兵交接典礼 Cindy can watch the changing of the guard.
我们可以请得起那种傲慢的男管家 We can afford one of those snooty butlers...
早餐吃腌鱼和柑橘果酱 kippers and marmalade for breakfast...
骑马去狩猎 riding to hounds.
我不要穿条纹裤出洋相 I will not be caught dead in striped pants.
这是给银行家和战争投机商穿的 They're for bankers and war profiteers.
实际上，这条裤子是 Actually, they were ordered...
南斯拉夫人民共和国的大使定做的 by the ambassador from the People's Republic of Yugoslavia.
时机一到我们就会去对付铁托的 We will deal with Tito when the time comes.
听着，把裤子脱掉改一改 Meanwhile, take them off and fix them.
他穿着太大了 They're much too big.
在这位女士面前脱吗？ In front of the lady?
哦对了，我忘了，他没穿内裤 Oh, yeah, I forgot. He doesn't wear shorts.
难怪他们要赢得冷战胜利了呢 No wonder they're winning the Cold War.
好吧，去另一件屋里弄 All right. In the other room.
别走开，菲丽丝 Don't go away, Phyllis.
英格伯格，给他拿条内裤穿 Ingeborg, get him some shorts.
坐下 Sitzen machen.
早安，麦克纳马拉夫人 Good morning, Mrs. MacNamara.
早安 Guten Morgen.
内裤，我找找，内裤在哪？ Shorts. Let me see. Where are the shorts?
你自己也得穿啊 You could use some yourself.
我不想让您觉得 I don't want you to think...
我每天都穿成这样来办公室 I come to the office like this every day.
那我真是如释重负啊 That's a load off my mind.
昨晚麦克纳马拉先生让我把裙子脱掉 Last night Mr. MacNamara made me take my dress off.
他真顽皮，不是吗？ Playful, isn't he?
他完全有权利这么做。毕竟，他给我钱了 He had a perfect right to. After all, he paid for it.
哦，这样可就大不相同了 Well, that makes all the difference.
不不不，你没弄明白 No, no, no. You don't understand.
那是我工作的一部分， 你可以说是额外福利 It's part of my job. What you call fringe benefits.
你怎么会喜欢这种工作呢？ 这个贱... How do you like that? The son of a...
他要开始自己的马歇尔计划了 is starting his own Marshall Plan.
哦，找到了，我要出去了 Oh, here. I go now.
我们一起出去吧 We both go now.
麻烦你给我丈夫带个口信好吗？ Will you please give my husband a message?
就说我跟他说aloha Tell him I said aloha.
aloha？ Aloha?
那是夏威夷语，意思是“滚蛋” That's Hawaiian for "get lost."
找条短裤找这么久？ What's holding up those shorts?
已经找到啦 Right here.
您夫人要我传话给你，说aloha And your wife said to tell you aloha.
那是夏威夷语里“滚蛋”的意思 That's Hawaiian for "get lost."
菲丽丝！ Phyllis!
您要的晚宴，要放在哪里？ The dinner, where do you want it?
会议室 In the conference room.
菲丽丝！ Phyllis!
麦克纳马拉先生，鄙人名叫安特米尔 Mr. MacNamara, my name is Untermeier.
是《柏林日报》的记者 I'm a reporter from the "Tageblatt."
别烦我，改天再来 Don't bother me. Some other time.
但事关重大 But this is important.
我们收到消息，可口可乐公司的哈泽汀小姐 We have information that Miss Hazeltine of Coca Cola...
嫁给了东柏林的某个人 married somebody in East Berlin...
而且是一名共产党员 a member of the Communist Party.
坐下！ Sitzen machen.
我不要穿这个，太可笑了 I will not wear these. They look ridiculous.
穿这个完全没有意义 They serve no useful purpose.
亲爱的，这只是习俗 Darling, it's just a convention.
等回到家，我们都可以把内裤晾在羊排上 Back home, we even put panties on lamb chops.
它是随洗随干的，百分之五十的尼龙 They are drip and dry. 50??nylon.
尼龙？那是杜邦公司出产的。 我不要穿垄断者的东西 Nylon? That's DuPont. I'll wear no monopoly.
还有百分之五十的棉呢，这可以 They're also 50??cotton. That'll help...
帮助那些密西西比的佃农 those sharecroppers in Mississippi.
好啦，坐下，让我看看你的吃相 All right. Sit down. Let's see how you eat.
吃？他终于说句人话了 Eat? That's the first good idea he's had.
我都饿死了 I'm starving.
不，不能那样吃 No, not like that.
要从第一道菜开始 Start with the first course.
我们得教他一些餐桌礼仪 We have to teach him some table manners.
不，不，一次只能吃一根 No, no. One at a time.
还要用芦笋夹，亲爱的 And use the asparagus tongs, darling.
用什么？ The what?
就是那边那个夹子 Those little grabbers over there.
为什么我不能吃鸡肉？ Why can't I have my chicken?
- 行李箱。 - 好，把那些都装进去 Luggage. Ok. Fill those up...
一起运到希尔顿的婚礼套房 and take them over to the bridal suite at the Hilton.
箱子要写上姓名首字母缩写吗？ You want initials on the bags?
姓名缩写？他还没有名字呢 Initials? He doesn't even have a name yet.
不不不不！ No!
他说得对，亲爱的，吃鸡肉一定要喝白葡萄酒的 He's right, darling. Always white wine with chicken.
要用酒杯喝，笨蛋 Out of a glass, stupid.
是啊，你什么都懂 Yeah, you know everything.
要喝什么酒，要用哪把叉子吃鱼 Which wine to drink, which fork to use for fish...
要用哪把刀背刺无产阶级 which knife to stab the proletariat in the back with.
想要一点水果作为餐后甜点吗？ How would you like a little fruit for dessert?
伯爵先生来到您的办公室了 The Count is waiting in the office.
好吧，斯嘉丽，继续教他 All right. Scarlett, keep working on him.
这个，亲爱的，要用洗指碗 Here, darling. Use the finger bowl.
不，不，不要把他的旧衣服也装进去 No, no. Don't pack his old clothes.
这些衣服要怎么办？ What shall we do with them?
烧了，不过要先消毒 Burn them, but first have them disinfected.
等一下！ Wait a minute!
我的党籍证在里面 My party membership book is in there.
到十二月就能转正了 I'm paid up till December.
坐下 Sitzen machen.
您好啊 Hello there.
沃尔德马，来自德罗斯特·斯卡滕博格 Waldemar von Droste Schattenburg.
麦克纳马拉，来自内布拉斯加的奥马哈 MacNamara von Omaha, Nebraska.
能不能劳驾您告诉我为什么要叫我过来？ Would you mind telling me why I was summoned here?
因为我每离开岗位一分钟 Because every minute I am away from my post...
就要扣除我两马克的小费 it costs me two marks in tips.
好，实话告诉你吧 Ok. I'll lay it on the line.
你想成为父亲吗？ How would you like to become a father?
以我现在的年龄？ At my age?
我想让你收养一个小伙子 There's a young man I'd like you to adopt.
会给你两千马克的小费 And the tip is two thousand marks.
- 祝您今天愉快，先生。 - 站住，伯爵 Good day, sir. Hold on there, Count.
就因为我屈尊 Just because I am reduced...
到洗手间工作挣钱维生 to earning my living in a washroom...
并不是说我就愿意兜售 does not mean that I'm willing to peddle...
我家族名字的荣耀与高贵 the honor and dignity of my family name.
冯·德罗斯特·斯卡滕博格家族从第二次 十字军东征(1147-1149)起就存在了 The von Droste Schattenburgs date back to the Second Crusade.
我们拥有欧洲最古老的血统之一 We have one of the oldest bloodlines in Europe...
也是近亲结姻最多的家族之一 and one of the most inbred.
我是“血流不止的”菲利普的直系后裔 I am a direct descendant of Philip the Bleeder.
因此您的提议不仅仅是荒谬的 So your proposition is not only preposterous...
更是对我的深深侮辱 it is highly insulting.
- 十万马克我就答应。 - 我给你三千 Make it ten thousand marks. I'll give you three thousand.
我刚才告诉您了我祖上都是会血流不止的人 I just told you I come from a long line of bleeders...
所以不要再砍价了 so don't cut the price.
四千 Four thousand.
您要知道 I will have you know...
我和埃及前国王法鲁克一世是远房亲戚 that I am distantly related to ex king Farouk of Egypt.
三千五 Thirty five hundred.
刚才不还说四千呢吗？ What happened to four thousand?
成交 It's a deal.
英格伯格，叫皮弗尔过来 Ingeborg, send Piffl in here.
再加五百马克额外费用，我就把家族徽章给您 For an additional 500 marks, I will include the family crest.
是什么图案？纸巾上面衬着两块肥皂？ What is it, two cakes of soap on a field of paper towels?
是鸢尾花底上衬着一头跃立的豪猪 A porcupine rampant on a field of fleur de lis.
再给您一张斯卡滕博格城堡的相片 You may also have a photograph of the Schattenburg Castle...
很不幸它在战火中被毁了 unfortunately destroyed during the war.
美国空军干的？ American Air Force?
不，是土耳其骑兵干的，在1683年 No. Turkish cavalry. 1683.
你不能对我呼来唤去 You can't just order me around
什么“来这里，坐那里，做这个，吃那个！” "Come here, sit there, do this, eat that!"
亲爱的，别动。我还没弄好你的袖口 Darling, hold still. I can't get your cuff link in.
这就是那个幸运儿吗？ Is this the lucky young man?
就是他，来见见你父亲 That's him. Meet your father.
- 我父亲？ - 啊，亲爱的孩子 My father? Ah, my dear boy.
我相信你会光宗耀祖的 I'm sure you will be a credit to the family.
可以用一点儿赊欠来达成 (英文credit既有“光宗耀祖”之意，又有“赊欠”之意) It could use a little credit.
- 这是怎么一回事？ - 你被收养了 What is all this? You're being adopted.
收养了？都没问问我就这样做了？ Adopted? Just like that, without even asking me?
这不仅不光明正大，而且是单方面的 This is not only devious, it's unilateral.
我的眼睛，我的眼睛怎么了？ My eye. What's the matter with my eye?
- 这是你的媳妇。 - 您好小姐 This is your daughter in law. Gn鋎ige Frau.
斯嘉丽，我眼里有什么东西！ Scarlett, I've got something in my eye!
是单片眼镜，你戴着它真可爱 It's a monocle. Looks cute on you.
单片眼镜？你们怎么能如此卑鄙？ A monocle? How sneaky can you get?
去那里签署文件 Go in there and sign the papers...
出门时把这个交给出纳 and give this to the cashier on the way out.
谢谢您 Thank you.
你认为自己是在做什么？ What do you think you're doing?
我们酒店(指凯宾斯基)赠送的服务，不收钱 It's on the house, no charge.
再见，我的儿子 Good bye, my son.
现在，你们两个要记住自己的新名字 Now, I want you kids to memorize your new name.
你们是冯·德罗斯特·斯卡滕博格 伯爵和伯爵夫人 You are the Count and Countess von Droste Schattenburg.
伯爵？ Count?
伯爵夫人！那就是说每个人都要向我 行屈膝礼喽 Countess! That means everybody has to curtsy to me...
也许格雷丝·凯莉(注：因为她是王妃)不用 except maybe Grace kelly.
不会有人对你行礼的 Nobody will curtsy to you.
我拒绝加入贵族 I refuse to join the aristocracy.
他们都是水蛭 They're all leeches...
专吸贫困大众的血 bleeding the underprivileged masses.
冯·德罗斯特·斯卡滕博格家族不会的 Not the von Droste Schattenburgs.
他们吸自己的血 （O(∩_∩)O） They bleed themselves.
把他带到别的房间里给他换衣服 Take him into the other room and get him dressed.
现在他有名字了 And now that he's got a name...
我想让他签署一些东西 there are some things I want him to sign.
签什么？ What things?
首先，我要把我的豪华轿车 First, I'm turning over my limousine...
和司机转让给你 and my chauffeur to you.
我只想要回我的摩托车 All I want is my motorcycle back.
哪有伯爵夫人坐在双人摩托车的侧座上的？ Whoever heard of a countess in a sidecar?
还有，我们的孩子要放在哪里？ Besides, where will we put the baby?
还要让他填写这些申请表 And have him fill out these applications
高尔夫俱乐部，大莱俱乐部 golf club, Diners Club...
蓝十字会，每月一书俱乐部 Blue Cross, Book of the Month Club...
每月一水果俱乐部 Fruit of the Month Club.
我不会签任何文件，不会加入任何组织 I will sign nothing. I will join nothing.
可是亲爱的，这就是美国人的生活方式啊 But, darling, it's the American way of life.
美国人的生活方式 American way of life.
失业，歧视 Unemployment, discrimination...
强盗，青少年犯罪 gangsterism, juvenile delinquency...
不过我们在新的二十年计划下 but under our new twenty year plan...
会赶上你们的 we will catch up with you.
那要运气特别好才行 Lots of luck.
英格伯格，叫装瓶厂的经理 Ingeborg, get the manager of the bottling plant...
立刻到这里来 up here right away...
并且看看你能不能马上给我找一个 画招牌的人过来 and see if you can find me a sign painter in a hurry.
宪兵队？ What M.P. S?
有什么能为你们效劳的吗？ What can I do for you boys?
你是这的头头吗？ Are you the head man around here?
没错 That's me.
我们收到特种部队的报告 We have a report from one of our G.I. S...
你这里有个女雇员 you've got a female employee here...
是敌人派来的奸细 who's an enemy agent.
奸细？ Enemy agent?
那位跑来跑去的 What would you call a dame that's running around...
胸部纹着“美国佬滚蛋”的女士叫什么？ with "Yankee go home" tattooed on her chest?
一定是有人戏弄你们的 Somebody must be pulling your leg.
也许是也许不是，不介意我们到处看看吧？ Maybe and maybe not. Mind if we look around?
请随意 Be my guest.
哦，好哇，小鬼头 Oh, Ok, buster.
我们走 Let's go.
您找我，先生？ You sent for me, sir?
克劳泽，作为装瓶厂的经理 Krause, as manager of the bottling plant...
你一直抱怨需要更多的帮助 you're always complaining that you need more help.
是的，先生，楼下真是太忙了 Yes, sir. We're very busy downstairs.
不过你就要有一个助手了 You're going to get an assistant.
- 是谁？ - 就是你 Who? You.
- 我？ - 没错 Me? That's right.
装瓶厂的新经理名叫 The new manager of the bottling plant...
奥托·冯·德罗斯特·斯卡滕博格 is Otto von Droste Schattenburg.
我拒绝 I refuse.
你的职位虽降了，但你的薪水会涨的 Your position may be lower, but your pay will be higher.
我接受 I accept.
很好，到会议室去 All right. Into the conference room.
你只有15分钟 You've got fifteen minutes...
来教这个家伙关于装瓶工作 to teach this guy everything you know...
你所知道的一切 about the bottling business.
感激不尽 I can't thank you enough.
去吧 Out.
柏莎，让我跟麦克纳马拉夫人说话 Bertha, let me talk to Mrs. MacNamara.
你说她打包离开了是什么意思？ What do you mean she packed up and left?
带孩子一起走了吗？ 什么时候走的？ Mit die kinder? Where did they go?
乘的士是吧，多谢 Into a taxi. Thanks a lot.
麦克纳马拉先生，我不想占用您的时间 Mr. MacNamara, I don't want to take up your time...
我只想跟哈泽汀小姐说几句 so if you'll just let me talk to Miss Hazeltine.
说什么？ About what?
说说她嫁给了东柏林的一个共产党员这件事 About her marriage to that Communist in East Berlin.
在我们刊印这个故事之前，需要当事人的陈述 I'd like a statement before we print the story.
没什么故事，也没什么共产党员 There is no story, and there's no Communist.
但我们知道她的确嫁人了 But we know she got married.
嫁人没错，是嫁给了 奥托·冯·德罗斯特·斯卡滕博格伯爵 Sure she did, to Count Otto von Droste Schattenburg.
- 谁？ - “血流不止的”奥托 Who? Otto the Bleeder.
家世一直要追溯到第二次十字军东征时期 Goes all the way back to the Second Crusade...
祖上是土耳其骑兵，这是家族的城堡 a Turkish cavalry. Here's the family castle.
我是画师 Painter.
哦 Oh...
跟我来 come with me.
坐下 Sitzen machen.
我要你把这个徽章画到车门上 I want you to paint this crest on the door of a car.
需要多长时间？太长了 How long will it take? That's too long.
听着，我的奔驰就停在楼下 Look, my Mercedes is parked downstairs.
哦，抱歉 Oh, excuse me.
- 哈泽汀小姐吗？ - 有事吗？ Miss Hazeltine? Yes?
您丈夫的名字怎么拼？ How do you spell your husband's name?
P-I-F-F-L
皮弗尔？我还以为是叫 冯·德罗斯特·斯卡滕博格呢 Piffl? I thought it was von Droste Schattenburg.
哦，那个呀。你一定不要相信 Oh, that. You mustn't believe...
麦克纳马拉先生告诉你的每件事 everything Mr. MacNamara tells you.
他一手策划了整件事情 He fixed it all up...
这样我爸就不会发现奥托是个共产党了 so that Daddy wouldn't find out Otto's a Red.
起初，我并不喜欢麦克纳马拉先生 In the beginning, I didn't like Mr. MacNamara...
不过后来发现他真是妙极了 but he's been just marvy.
够了，伯爵夫人 That's enough out of you, Countess.
- 我说错话了吗？ - 出去，好吗？ Did I say something wrong? Buzz off, will you?
你刚才说这里边没有故事 You said there was no story...
不过越来越精彩了 and it's getting better and better.
我要你忘记整件事情，你开价多少？ How much do you want to forget the whole thing?
你认为你可以收买一个德国记者吗？ You think you can buy a German newspaperman?
我以前从没试过 I never tried before.
也许在美国你们的记者是可以收买的 Maybe in America your journalists are for sale...
但在德国这里... but here in Germany
收养文件，全都签好并公证完毕了 The adoption papers. All signed and notarized.
中尉您好 Herr Oberleutnant.
你俩认识？ You two know each other?
- 他是我的指挥官。 - 在地铁里？ He was my commanding officer. In the subway?
是在那之后，我被征召以后 After that, when I was drafted.
啊哈！盖世太保啊 Aha! Gestapo.
不不，是党卫军 No, no. S.S.
闭上你的嘴，白痴 Halten Sie doch den Mund, Idiot.
哦，中尉先生 Well, Herr Oberleutnant...
我还能为您做什么吗？ is there anything else I can do for you?
不了，谢谢。我已采访完毕 No, thank you. I have all the facts.
国际知名的 Union between two...
哈泽汀家族和 internationally prominent families
冯·德罗斯特·斯卡滕博格家族的结合 the Hazeltines and the von Droste Schattenburgs.
年度社交盛事 The social event of the year.
内容将在今天下午的报纸登出 It will be in the afternoon paper.
最好是这样 It had better be.
- 再见。 - 祝您成功 Auf Wiedersehen. Sieg heil.
至于你，施莱默 As for you, Schlemmer...
你又做回SS了——减薪 (SS既是党卫军亦是减薪的缩写) you're back in the S.S. Smaller salary.
先生，我要解释一下 Sir, let me explain.
我只是军官食堂的糕点师 I was only a pastry cook in the officers' mess.
英格伯格，我要跟希尔顿的领班通话 Ingeborg, I want to speak to the maitre d' at the Hilton.
我是个非常差劲的糕点师 I was a very bad pastry cook.
都11点了，帽子呢？花呢？ 11:00. Where are the hats? Where are the flowers?
- 我们的进度慢了。 - 是的，先生 We're running behind schedule. Yes, sir.
曼弗雷德，我想安排一个私人的小型酒宴 Manfred, I'd like to arrange an intimate little banquet
冯·德罗斯特·斯卡滕博格伯爵和伯爵夫人 the Count and Countess von Droste Schattenburg...
向女方家长文德尔·P·哈泽汀夫妇聊表敬意 honoring his in laws, the Wendell P. Hazeltines.
你有条圆点印花裙吗？ You got a polka dot dress?
听着，小姐，有纹身在你的，呃... Look, Fräulein, haben Sie eine tattoo on your, um...
大钟(委婉指乳房)上吗？ glockenspiel?
这间办公室里有娘们吗？ Any broads working in this office?
没有，先生，只有我 No, sir. Just me.
看呐，中士，圆点印花裙。 跟描述的一个样 Look, Sarge, polka dots. It fits the description.
- 嘿，那是谁的裙子？ - 不知道 Hey, whose dress is that? I don't know.
我从没见过 I never saw it before.
我们最好打开看看 We'd better check it out.
下士，我要免除自己的职务 Corporal, I'm relieving myself of duty.
最好带我回基地 Better take me back to the base...
把我交给精神病学家观察 and turn me in for psychiatric observation.
怎么了，中士？ What's the matter, Sarge?
她就在里面，知道吗 She's in there, all right.
我看见她赤裸裸的在里面 I saw her naked as a jaybird.
她乳房上有纹身吗？ Has she got the tattoo on her chest?
那有什么问题吗，中士？ So what's wrong, Sarge?
伙计们，你们肯定不会相信 Fellas, you won't believe this...
她一个乳房是黄色的 but one of them is yellow.
另一个是绿色的 One of them is green.
快带我走！ Take me away!
主菜，我要点鹿肉和白玉米粗粉 For the entree, we'll have venison and hominy grits.
我怎么知道你们上哪去弄白玉米粗粉？ 去陆军消费合作社看看 How do I know where you get hominy grits? Try the Army PX.
餐后甜点，哈泽汀喜欢火烧白兰地桃子 For dessert, peaches flambe a la Hazeltine.
还要葡萄酒，以及超大装可口可乐， 分装两个冰桶里 Wine, king size Coca Cola in individual ice buckets.
餐桌装饰，用冯·德罗斯特·斯卡滕博格盾徽 Table decoration, the von Droste Schattenburg...
以及两面交叉的旗帜，德国的和联盟的 coat of arms with crossed flags, German and Confederate.
音乐要《迪克西》《斯旺尼河》 《等待罗伯特·E·李将军》(均为南北战争时期歌曲) Music, "Dixie," "Swanee River," "Waiting for the Robert E. Lee,"
但不能演奏这首，绝对不能演奏 《行军穿越乔治亚洲》 but not, I repeat not, "Marching Through Georgia."
你真要让我当装瓶厂的老板？ You really want to make me the boss of the bottling plant?
必须如此，这样你的岳父 It's a must so your father in law...
就不会认为你只是个挂着贵族头衔的 垮掉的一代 won't think you're just a titled beatnik...
只能依靠你妻子生活 sponging off your wife.
我会喜欢这份工作的 I'm going to like this job.
你也差不多该配合我了 It's about time you started to cooperate.
你知道我要做的第一件事是什么吗？ You know what the first thing is I'm going to do?
我会领导下面的工人起来造反！ I'm going to lead the workers down there in revolt!
穿上裤子吧，斯巴达克思 Put your pants on, Spartacus.
英格伯格，给机场打电话 Ingeborg, call the airport...
问他们12点从伦敦飞来的飞机是否准点到 and find out if the 12:00 plane from London is on time.
遵命，麦克纳马拉先生 Yes, Mr. MacNamara.
起来！不愿做软饮料奴隶的人们！ Soft drink slaves of the world arise!
砸碎那些瓶子吧 Smash those bottles...
把饮料倒进下水沟吧 pour that syrup down the sewers
- 还记得我吗？ - 佩里佩奇科夫委员 Remember me? Commissar Peripetchikoff.
好好好 Well.
我才不好呢 Well is the one thing I am not.
你是俄罗斯的委员？ You are a Russian commissar?
这是你最后一次戏弄我了！ For the last time, you have made fool of me!
他也戏弄了我。听着，委员先生 He fooled me, too. Listen, Commissar...
您必须帮助我和我的妻子进入苏维埃区 you must help me and my wife get into the Soviet Zone.
这也许会有点小困难 There may be a little problem.
是啊，大家都在往这边走 Yeah, everybody's coming this way.
每天一千五百人 Fifteen hundred people a day.
你想与这浩大的车流相抗衡吗？ You want to fight all that traffic?
我是一名党员，12月就要转正了 I'm a party member, paid up till December.
他们需要我过去，我是一个导弹科学家 They need me there. I'm a missile scientist.
啊，这是我们超过美国的领域之一 Ah, that is one field where we're ahead of America.
在卡纳维拉尔角(美国一火箭发射场) 如果导弹出故障了 In Cape Canaveral, if missile goes wrong...
他们会按下特殊按钮，乓的一声！ they press special button and pow!
导弹就爆炸了 It blows up...
但在俄国，我们有两个按钮 but in Russia, we have two buttons.
两个按钮！ Two buttons!
一个用来引爆导弹，一个用来引爆科学家 One to blow up missile, one to blow up scientist.
你是什么委员啊？ What kind of a commissar are you?
前委员 An ex commissar.
你叛变了？ You've defected?
俄国古谚说得好：往西走吧，年轻人 Is old Russian proverb go west, young man.
你那两个伙伴米什金和博洛登科怎样了？ What happened to your pals Mishkin and Borodenko?
在从勃兰登堡门送往医院的救护车里 In ambulance on the way from Brandenburg Gate...
我偷了博洛登科秘密警察证章 I snitched Borodenko's Secret Police badge...
让他们两个都被逮起来了 and had them both arrested.
你背叛了自己的同志？ You betrayed your own comrades?
如果我不这样对他们，他们就会这样对我的 If I don't do it to them, they do it to me.
这也是一句俄国古谚哦 Is old Russian proverb.
你比他还坏 You're worse than he is.
听着，年轻的朋友 Look, my young friend.
我可不是自抬身价啊 I don't want to be name dropper...
可你想想看赫鲁晓夫是怎么对待马林科夫的？ (后者曾让位给前者，后被逐出政治局) but what do you think khrushchev did to Malenkov?
你再想想斯大林是怎么对待托洛茨基的？ (后者受前者迫害被认定为卖国贼) What do you think Stalin did to Trotsky?
世界上每个人都腐化了吗？ Is everybody in this world corrupt?
我可不知道别人怎样 I don't know everybody.
也许我们应该清算全体人类 Maybe we should liquidate the whole human race...
再从头来过 and start all over again.
你这样想，孩子 Look at it this way, kid.
一个能出现泰姬陵 Any world that can produce the Taj Mahal...
威廉·莎士比亚以及彩条牙膏的世界 William Shakespeare, and striped toothpaste...
并不是完全不好的 can't be all bad.
裤子改好了，你试一试 The trousers, you can try them on.
把他带过去穿 Take him with you.
从现在开始，我将独自战斗 From now on, I fight alone.
皮弗尔要对抗所有人和一切事物！ It's Piffl against everybody and everything!
看看我摊上什么人了？ See what I'm up against?
他连自己的名字都记不得了 He can't even remember his own name.
还是说说我吧 Get back to me
你想要什么，钱吗？ What do you want money?
当然不是，我就要成为富翁了 Certainly not. I will be rich man now.
你还记得那20车瑞士干酪吗？ You remember those twenty carloads of Swiss cheese?
- 它们怎么了？ - 我有个惊人的计划 What about them? I have tremendous scheme.
我要把它们换成20车德国泡菜 I will trade them for twenty carloads of sauerkraut...
然后我要给德国泡菜镀银 then I will silver plate the sauerkraut...
卖到美国去 and sell it in the United States...
作为圣诞树装饰品 for Christmas tree decorations.
你稳赚了 You're a cinch.
但我需要一个双语秘书， 你答应把那金发美女给我的 But I need bilingual secretary, and you promised me blond lady.
你来得正是时候 You came at the right time...
因为总之我要去伦敦了 because I'm moving to London anyway.
我还不知道怎么把这坏消息告诉她 I don't know how to break the news to her.
英格伯格！ Ingeborg!
这件事可不容易，她对我很着迷 It's not going to be easy. She's crazy about me.
我来了，麦克纳马拉先生 Yes, Mr. MacNamara.
分类广告，刊登在各大报纸上 A classified ad to run in all papers.
一位国际商人，超重但很可爱 International businessman overweight but cute
需要一名执行秘书 needs executive secretary.
额外福利包括各种旅游 Fringe benefits include extensive travel...
高额服装津贴，养老金不菲 large wardrobe allowance, liberal retirement plan...
这工作我要了 I take the job.
就要你了 You've got it.
再见，好运 Good bye. Good luck.
坦普尔霍夫机场电话里怎么说？ And what about that call to Templehof?
飞机将提前十分钟到达 The plane will be ten minutes early.
提前十分钟？ 10 minutes early?
这样经营航空公司真太不像话了 That's a hell of a way to run an airline.
飞机应该晚点，不应该提前啊 Planes are supposed to be late, not early.
哦，我再也不想见到他了 Oh, I never want to see him again.
我再也不想跟他说话了 I never want to speak to him.
我要离婚 I want a divorce.
现在是什么情形啊？ What's the matter now?
他不想要孩子了 He doesn't want the baby.
他说谁都不应该把孩子带到 He says nobody should bring children...
这样的一个世界上来 into a world like this.
那个讨人厌的废物 That miserable punk.
他之前怎么不这么想？ Why didn't he think of that before?
我都做到这份上了。他人在哪呢？ After all I've gone through. Where is he?
对不起，亲爱的。我没有那个意思 I'm sorry, darling. I didn't mean it.
我们当然要把孩子生下来 Of course we're going to have the baby.
我爱你 I love you.
别再这样吓唬我了 Don't ever scare me like that again.
也许我们的孩子可以把这个世界变得美好一点 Maybe our children can make this a better place to live in...
变成一个人人生来平等的世界 a world where men are created equal...
人人自由，正义长存 and there's liberty and justice for all.
恭喜你，你刚刚引用了托马斯·杰佛逊 Congratulations. You just quoted Thomas Jefferson...
亚伯拉罕·林肯 Abraham Lincoln...
以及对国旗宣誓效忠的言词 and the Pledge of Allegiance to the Flag.
什么？ I what?
快点，我们要出发了 Come on. Let's get going.
我可以拿去另一件屋里缝好 I take it into the other room and fix it.
没时间了，跟我们一起走吧 We haven't got time. Come with us.
施莱默！ Schlemmer!
坐下 Sitzen machen.
花来了 Blumen.
拿着，这是给你丈母娘的 Here. This is for your mother in law.
帽子来了 Hutte.
你，坐前面。 你，坐里面画 In front. You, paint from the inside.
快点，去机场，一二三走！ Quick, to the airport. Eins, zwei, drei.
好了！注意那把伞 All right! Watch that umbrella.
不，我不喜欢这顶 No, I don't like it.
给，你口袋里得装点儿东西 Here. You need some stuff for your pockets.
钱，香烟盒 Money, cigarette case...
打火机，城堡的相片 lighter, picture of the castle.
试试这顶，亲爱的 Try this one, darling.
你最好把我的腕表也拿去 You'd better take my wristwatch, too.
哦，那是我的手 Oh, that's my wrist.
哦 Oh.
你知道么亲爱的，我觉得 You know, darling, I don't think...
你不适合戴帽子 you were meant to wear a hat.
我也不适合当什么伯爵 I wasn't meant to be a count, either.
这太荒唐了，谁会相信呢？ This is ridiculous. Who's going to believe it?
冷静点儿。我们所知的美国皇室 Calm down. The only royalty we know in America...
只有纳特·金·科尔(爵士歌手)，“公爵”施奈德 (棒球中外野手)和厄尔·威尔逊(专栏作家) is Nat king Cole, Duke Snyder, and Earl Wilson.
哦，对不起 Oh, pardon.
拜托，甜心，不要这顶，打死也不要 Please, Liebchen, not that. Anything but that.
好吧，我们看看有没有黑色圆顶礼帽 All right. Let's see if we have a black bowler.
圆顶的，圆顶的 Bowler, bowler.
这是你欠我的清单 Here's a list of what you owe me.
- 欠你？ - 都逐条记下来了 Owe you? All itemized.
奔驰豪华轿车，两万马克 Mercedes limousine, twenty thousand marks.
收养费，四万五千马克 Cost of adoption, forty five hundred marks.
西服，男士服装，鞋，等等，等等 Suits, haberdashery, shoes, et cetera, et cetera...
一万两千八百马克 12,800 marks.
行李箱，花，七道晚宴，九百二十五马克 Luggage, flowers, 7 course dinner, 925 marks.
理发和修甲，十四马克 Haircut and manicure, fourteen marks.
小费，六马克。我给小费比较多 Tips, six marks. I'm a very large tipper.
腕表，香烟盒，燃油满满的打火机， 两千两百马克 Wristwatch, cigarette case, lighter with fluid, 2,200 marks.
零钱，四百七十五马克 Loose change, 475 marks.
总计，四万一千零二十马克， 约合十万零两百五十五美元 Total, 41,020 marks, or $10,255.
你是说我才当了三个小时的资本家 You mean I have been a capitalist for three hours...
就已经欠下了十万美元了？ and already I owe $10,000?
我们的系统就是这样运作的 That's what makes our system work.
人人互相欠钱 Everybody owes everybody.
就要这顶！ That's the one!
看起来不是很高贵吗？ Doesn't it look distinguished?
不算坏 Not bad.
11点46了，开快点，弗里茨！ 11:46. Faster, Fritz!
在你见我爸之前，我得警告你 Before you meet Daddy, I'd better warn you
他对某些话题会强烈关注 there are certain things he feels very strongly about.
- 其一是南北战争。 - 南北战争？ One is the Civil War.
如果说到这个话题，就说双方打成平手 If the subject comes up, just say it was a draw.
其二是可口可乐 Another is Coca Cola.
告诉他我们必须不能满足于六瓶装 Tell him we must look beyond the six pack.
为什么不做成九瓶装或十二瓶装呢？ Why not a nine pack or a twelve pack?
还有就是高尔夫 Then there's golf.
高尔夫，全家一起玩，待在一起 Golf, the family that plays together stays together.
还有世界形势 And the world situation...
情况严重，但并非无望 It's serious, but not hopeless.
活体解剖 And vivisection.
不能对狗这么做 It shouldn't happen to a dog.
红色中国，收入所得税，田纳西·威廉姆斯 (美国著名剧作家，曾两获普利策奖) And Red China and income taxes and Tennessee Williams.
等等！停车。这没用的 Wait! Stop the car. It's no use.
我记不住这么多事情 I can't remember all that.
亲爱的，你现在可不能打退堂鼓啊 Darling, you can't give up now.
也许我们会走运的 Maybe we'll get lucky.
也许有人劫持了飞机 Maybe somebody hijacked the plane.
好了，亲爱的，你让我来处理这个年轻人吧 Now, honey, you let me handle this young man.
我只需花上30秒就能搞清 It'll take me just thirty seconds to find out...
他是不是那种傍富婆的 if he's one of those fortune hunters...
或是某种疯子 or some kind of a crackpot.
哦，亲爱的，我希望不是 Oh, dear. I hope not.
你是不知道这些欧洲人 You don't know these Europeans.
我可怜的宝贝孩子哟 My poor honey child.
他们人在哪呢？ Where are they anyway?
你要再把裤子撕破，我就把你撕两半儿 Tear them again, and I'll tear you apart.
斯嘉丽！ Scarlett!
妈妈！ Mother!
让我看看你 Let me look at you.
爸爸 Dad.
好啦，他在哪里？ All right. Now, where is he?
在那边 Over here.
我想你们介绍我的丈夫奥托 I want you to meet my husband Otto.
冯·德罗斯特·斯卡滕博格伯爵？ The Count von Droste Schattenburg.
冯什么伯爵？ Count von what?
这是我的母亲 This is my mother.
殿下您好 Your highness.
拜托，直系亲属不用行礼 Please, not in the immediate family.
哦，行吻手礼的家伙 Oh, one of those a hand kisser.
这是我的父亲 And this is my father.
嗨，老爸，你的高尔夫玩的如何了？ Hello, Dad. How's your golf?
我常说，一起去玩的家庭... I always say, the family that plays together
不提这个了 Never mind that.
我想问你一些问题 There are a few questions I want to ask you.
别担心，如果是男孩，我们就给他取您的名字 Don't worry. If it's a boy, we'll name him after you.
文德尔·P·冯·德罗斯特·斯卡滕博格 Wendell P. Von Droste Schattenburg.
冯·德罗斯特什么？ Von Droste what?
给孩子换尿布时我们会非常小心的 We have to be very careful when we change the baby's diapers.
奥托祖上都是会血流不止的人 Otto comes from a long line of bleeders.
哦，这不是很好嘛？ Oh, isn't that nice?
我一直想让斯嘉丽嫁给一个 I always wanted Scarlett to be married...
祖上有普遍遗传特征的人 to a long line of something.
好，麦克纳马拉，跟我说说这个年轻人吧 Now, MacNamara, tell me about this young man.
他是谁，除了舔女人的手 Who is he, and what does he do...
他还是干什么的？ besides slobber over women's hands?
别被他的头衔骗了，他是正当谋生的 Don't let that title fool you. He works for a living.
是干什么的？ Doing what?
实际上，他是我们装瓶厂的经理 As a matter of fact, he's head of our bottling plant.
他为我们工作？ He works for us?
我手下最能干的。工程师毕业生 Best man I ever had. Graduate engineer.
我用了很多欺诈手段 Took a lot of finagling...
才把他从竞争对手手里抢过来 to get him away from our competitors.
不会吧 You don't say.
看，这是我家族城堡的相片 Now, this is a picture of the family castle.
这是我的会员证，呃 And this is my party membership oops.
拿错了 Wrong party.
这是我的家徽 And here's the family crest.
你得在你的所有信纸上绘上这个徽章 You'll have to put that on all your stationery...
还有银餐具和内衣上 and your silverware and your underwear...
哦，孩子，很高兴你加入我们这个大家庭 Well, son, glad to have you on the team.
我猜你们是在装瓶厂认识的吧 I suppose you two met in the bottling plant.
不，我们是在游行队伍中认识的 No. We met in a parade.
他高举着赫鲁晓夫的照片 He was carrying a picture of khrushchev.
赫鲁晓夫？ Khrushchev?
是，上面有个巨大的标语“俄国佬滚蛋！” Yes, with a big slogan on it "Russki go home!"
他们因此把他送进了监狱 They threw him in jail for it.
可怜的孩子 My poor boy.
柏林的形势如何？ How is the situation here in Berlin?
这不应该发生在一只狗身上 It shouldn't happen to a dog.
我是说打成平手 I mean it's a draw.
事实上，当前形势很无望但并不严重 Actually, the situation is hopeless but not serious.
很无望但... Hopeless but not
呀，这孩子真是颇有胆识啊 Say, the boy's got a head on his shoulders.
我说什么来着？ What did I tell you?
交给我好吗？弗里茨...(又是鸟语) May I have those? Fritz...
然后，施莱默！ Next. Schlemmer!
把这些拿去入境检验，一二三去！ Take these to passport control. One, two, three.
接下来！爸，妈 Next! Mom, Dad...
我今晚设小宴为你们接风 I'm giving a little banquet tonight.
小型家庭聚餐 Un petit dîner en famille.
哦，他还会说法语 Oh, he speaks French, too.
- 俄语也会说。 - 俄语？ And Russian. Russian?
当然是白俄罗斯语 White Russian, of course.
哦，爸爸，有些想法 Now, Dad, there are a few ideas...
我想跟您讨论一下 I'd like to kick around with you.
如今，我们不能满足于六瓶装 Now, we must look beyond the six pack.
为什么不做成九瓶装或十二瓶装呢？ Why not a nine pack or a twelve pack?
泛美17号行帮，飞往纽约 Pan American Flight 17 to New York...
经由法兰克福，现在开始在五号登机门登机 via Frankfurt now boarding at Gate Five.
菲丽丝！ Phyllis!
麦克！你百分百成功了 Mac! You came through 100??
尽我所能吧 I did what I could.
现在我确信我找到了合适的人 Now I'm sure I found the right man...
可以胜任伦敦的工作 for the London job.
承蒙抬爱，哈泽汀先生 Thanks, Mr. Hazeltine.
这正是我们需要的 It's just what we need
一个好的组织者 somebody who's a good organizer...
干劲十足，懂这行 has a lot of drive, knows the business...
能说多国语言 speaks several languages.
哦，我一有机会就学习 Well, I studied every chance I had.
对，绝对是这个位子的理想人选 Absolutely the ideal man for this position.
我这么说可不只是因为他是我的女婿哦 And I'm not just saying that because he's my son in law.
什么？ How's that?
这一点也不会有损我们的声誉 It's not going to hurt our prestige any.
全欧洲业务的首脑 Head of European operations
奥托·冯·德罗斯特·斯卡滕博格伯爵 Count Otto von Droste Schattenburg.
哦，原来是这样 Oh, that's how it is.
至于你，麦克，我不会忘了你的 As for you, Mac, you haven't been forgotten.
你将一口气升到顶层 You're going all the way to the top now.
总部那边有个职位空缺 There's an opening in the home office...
采购部的副总裁 vice president in charge of procurement...
就是你的了 and it is all yours.
你为什么对我这么好？ Why are you so good to me?
我知道你一定迫不及待想回亚特兰大了 I know you must be dying to get back to Atlanta.
的确是迫不及待 Dying is right.
拿着吧，伯爵。我不再需要这伞了 Here you are, Count. I won't be needing this anymore.
谢啦，老伙计 Thank you, old chap.
再见，伯爵夫人 Bye, Countess.
麦克纳马拉先生，我真心敬爱您 Mr. MacNamara, I simply adore you.
- 您会给我们写信吗？ - 不止呢 Will you write to us? Better than that.
我还会给你们寄些镀银的德国泡菜 I'll send you some silver plated sauerkraut...
作为圣诞节礼物 for Christmas.
妈妈，我们能喝瓶可口可乐吗？ Mom, can we have a Coke?
上飞机再喝吧，我身上没零钱 You can have one on the plane. I don't have any change.
- 我有零钱。 - 麦克！ I've got change. Mac!
你们能下来为我送行真好 Very nice of you to come down here to see me off.
你要去哪？ Where are you going?
回美国 Back to the States.
真有趣，我们也要回去 Funny, that's where we're going.
我想我会乘17号航班飞往纽约 I thought I'd take Flight 17 to New York.
从那里乘免费巴士去亚特兰大 From there I can hop a freedom bus to Atlanta.
亚特兰大？ Atlanta?
是啊，我是新任的分管瓶盖的副总裁 I'm the new vice president in charge of bottle caps.
明升暗降啊 They're kicking me upstairs.
这是我自己一直以来想做的事情 That's something I've always wanted to do myself.
所以你和孩子们随时想来找我都可以 So anytime you and the kids would care to join me...
我会等着你们的 I'll be waiting for you.
等一下，开个小会 Just a minute. Conference.
三人中两人赞成，交易通过 Two out of three. Deal is on.
两人赞成？ Two out of three?
好吧，谁是那个聪明人？ All right. Who's the wise guy?
施莱默！(手里拿的是百事可乐O(∩_∩)O~) Schlemmer!
剧终