Now! It's comin'..
No, that's not it..
Yep. No. Yep. No. Yep. No. Yep. No. Yep. No.....
~ Naboolio, why did you have to go? ~
~ Naboolio, we really loved you so! ~
~ I heard you sing, you had a velvet voice. The way you danced, I really had no choice. ~
~ Naboolio, why did you leave us so? ~
~ Naboolio, why did you have to go? ~
~ -Boolio, Boolio, why did you have to go, leave me solo? -Give it up now, for Naboolio. ~
~ -Boolio, Boolio, why did you have to go, leave me solo. -Give it up now for Naboolio. ~
~ Sucking on my titties, like you loving me, wanting me, squeezing me, baby, come on - you know you want it. ~
~ Sucking on my titties, like you loving me, hun. Squeezing me, teasing me. Baby, yeah, baby come on, uh! ~
~ Sucking on my titties, like you... ~
What are you doing?!
Sorry, I got a bit carried away...
Peter?
Naboo is dead!
But there is a way, to bring a shaman back to live.
You must retrieve the sacred Ruby of Kukundu.
It is to be found deep in the Arctic tundra...
-Let's go! -..or Spain.
-Arctic tundra or Spain? -Yeah, I can't remember which one it is, sorry.
Yeah, they're quite far apart Bollo, you know? You could be little bit more specific.
No.
Sucking on my titties, like you loving me, wanting me, squeezing me. Baby, yeah, uh - come on!
Well there you have it - that's the end of the first half, things are hotting up.
-Naboo's dead. -Yep, bit of a shocker.
Bollo's gone insane with greif.
So we're left to retrieve the Ruby of Kukundu. Hm.. the second half.
Will we find it? Won't we? Will we? Won't we? Will we? Won't we?
We will. But uh...
But will we?
We will. Will we find it? We will find it.
So - I suggest I'll go to Spain, you know, you'll go to the Arctic and we'll see how we do, yeah?
Yeah? Maybe I'll go to Spain though eh?
No no I'll go to Spain, because I'm Spanish. So.. you should go to the Arctic and I'll..
-As if you're Spanish. -..I'll do the Spanish leg.
-Well, I'm a Spaniard - you know, I'm deeply Spanish. -What?
-Oh yeah yeah yeah. -Get lost!
- I'm well Spanish. -Well Spanish? What are you a chav? I'm well Spanish, mate.
Yeah? I'm El Chaviola.
Sun-dried Chaviola.
Come on, but - come on, you're not Spanish! You're clearly..
-I am! -You're not! You're clearly from Leeds.
Ha ha ha? Nothing.
Great help that..
-Listen.. -Then leave.
Are you possessed?
By a twat?
-Listen - you're not Spanish. -I am.
You're not Spanish - you're clearly from Leeds. I've seen the way you talk to women.
Huh, you dirty cow, get in my wheelbarrow, cm'on!
-Listen... I was..don't talk about that, alright? -It was brilliant though!
Huh, you cheeky vixens, there's room for all of ya' in Barratt's barrow, cm'on!
I was drunk..
I know, so was I - I was in the wheelbarrow.
Alright, well we're gonna have decide who goes where, one way or the other, alright? I suggest we toss a coin.
-Have any coins about your person? -I haven't got any pockets.
You leave that to me.
-Okay, heads or tails? -Aaa.. tails!
-Oh, what a cunt! -Yeah!
It was a mime coin, he could have said anything. What a spazz.
That wasn't very PC (Politically Correct), was it? You all laughed, we're in it together.
See you in hell. So basically that is the end of the first half, go and have a drink, have a wee-wee and..
Aaaa fuck!
Watch out, watch out!
No, get away!
The only problem with be.. with when you are the Moon - like me - is, you have such a chalky white face, it makes your teeth look yellow.
And I went to the dentist and he said: Ooh your teeth are yellow! I said: Noo! Only when you compare them to my chalky white face.
If I had skin - like yours - they would not look yellow!
I had fifteen fillings and he said: That will be £500 . And I said: I don't pay for nothing! I'm the Moon!
And I rised out of the chair and I went off back up and he couldn't stop me.
Every now and then I recieve letter 'You still owe that money!' I say I might pay it, I might not.
I'm the Moon, I don't pay fucking dental fees!
Don't patronize me.
Howard Moon's journal - day thirty-seven.
Still no sign of the Ruby of Kukundu.
The Arctic is a very lonely place, so lonely here.. ..wind my only friend.
I hate you!
Shut up wind!
The Arctic is a very strange environment - the days are very short here.
Luckily the nights are even shorter.
Ha, where are you from?
Day thirty-eight.
A strange figure approaches from the horizon. Could this be my salvation?
Look deep into the parka!
What?
Look deep into the parka!
Why?
There are many things in here. Things you could never dream of!
Like what?
Omelettes..?
I've dreamt of omelettes.
And I dream of omeletts quite a lot actually. They call me The Omelette-dreamer.
Oh, hm.. okay then.. um.. unicorns? With AIDS?
-Have you dreamt of those? -No.
Hahaa!
Look deep into the parka, my friend.
Delve deep into the parka, for whatever you dream of will become yours.
Aaaah not that you idiot! That's my fucking eye! What are you doin'?!
-Sorry.. -Ooh anything but that!
-Oooh Christ! -I'm really sorry.
Ooh, don't just put it in loose!
Look at me! I'm like.. Swingball.
-Enough! Enough Swingball! -Sorry.
Sorry - there you go, I'll just.. it's in your pocket, look.
Oh that's where that pen went.
Now, look deep into the parka the second time. The good stuff's laid out at the front.
Delve in there.
Other side.
-What's this? -Telegram.
Oh, thanks. Well, don't go! I'm just gonna put the kettle on. Stick around and have a cuppa tea and a chat..
No thanks.
Why? Where are you going?
Opticians.
Well, if my hunch is correct, this telegram should lead me directly to the Ruby of Kukundu.
Dear Howard, thank you for the picture of your cock and balls..
I never sent that!
Howard Moon's journal - day thirty-eight. Must I end my life in this wilderness of ice and snow, oh woe..
~ All the things I'll never be All the things I'll never see ~
~ All there is that's left for me Is here in this eternity ~
~ Of isolation, isolation, isolation, isolation. ~
~ The cavalcade, the jamboree Of life I thought was meant for me ~
~ I never dreamed that it would be Replaced by this eternity ~
~ Of isolation, isolation. ~
~ All the things I'll never be All the things I'll never see ~
~ All there is that's left for me ~
~ Is here in this eternity of isolation, isolation! ~
Reasonably priced in the foyer.
Yes, meanwhile in Spain.
Hey, you guys, it's brilliant! I'm lovin' it here in Spain!
Hey, have any of you heard of The Ruby of Kukundu?
Sorry about that..
You did a bad thing!
You're fuckin' dead after the show!
At least I am protected by the script.
Oh yeah, the irony - the man protected by something he's never been in contact with.
Yeah, it's good, isn't it?
What are you laughing at?
Listen...
It's the first time he has laughed from this whole tour!
Don't laugh! Listen!
I need to speak with you alone. Solid, Gas get out of here, right now!
Bring your shitty quitar with you.
I have some business to do.
-You did a very bad thing! -I did a bad thing?!
Yes!
You nearly broke my nose!
I ate a bowl of yeast before the show, so.. Sorry about that.
It's something I do, I'm on a.. Atkins diet..
Listen - ...
-You mentioned The Ruby of Kukundu. -Yeah, so what?
Many men have mentioned this ruby and many men have been dyed!
Oh really? What colour?
I am slightly retarded. I'm on the fence either way.
What - the retarded fence?
Yeah, you know..
-Aaah what are you doin'? -I know a man..
-I know a... -Get out of my hat-space!
-I know, these are fuckin' big hats! -What's wrong with you?
It's like doing a scene with a chimp!
-It's just a figure of speech, Bollo. -Ah, okay.
Adios.
-I know of a guy over there.. -Aaah..
-Look, talk to me and then we'll face out together. -Okay.
I know of a guy.. ..over there.
Who can tell you, where the Ruby is.
He lives in the Forest of Doom.
The Foyer of Doom?
Yes. Just past the Mountain of Merchandise.
-He can tell you where the Ruby is. -Cool.
Okay, excellent and what's he gonna do? Piss on my face?
Don't be silly - I am not playing that character.
-Okay, bye. -Okay, good luck my friend.
-Yeah, seeya. -Goodbye.
Get off.
-But do not tell anyone. -What?
-Do not tell anyone I told you about this. -Okay.
Or surely I will be killed by murder.
-Okay. -Okay, goodbye. -Okay seeya.
So this wiseman, yeah? He's over by the Forest of Doom?
Aaa you silly bitch!
I forgot:)
And so Vince Noir set off on his terrifying journey towards the Forest of Doom.
Utilizing basic mime technique. He walked.
And then he moonwalked for a bit.
I've got the wrong shoes on, shut up!
Yes, that was pretty bad.
Rubber on rubber - it was never gonna work.
Don't try and body-pop your way out of it.
Onwards he walked mile after mile, mile after terrifying mile towards the Forest of Doom.
Mile after mile... you're going the wrong way. The sign.. yes.
You've got his sign you prick!
Onwards, ever onwards, he encountered a terrifying hurricane.
Oh dear..
The hurricane messed up Vince's neatly arranged coiffure.
-I don't think it did. -Yes, it did.
It didn't! It's weird, but it didn't. Get off me!
He told me to do it.
I am the narrator - he does my bidding.
After dealing with the hurricane/cagoule he carried on and eventually arrived at the fabled Forest of Doom!
Theatre..
Who are you?
I go by many names.
Well what are they then?
I'm getting around to that. I'm just leaving a mystical pause.
Some call me.. Mystery Man. Others know me as the Shadow Dweller.
Some call me Secret Peter.
Where is he hiding? In a shoe, in a bush, in a rock, in a side cupboard, in a lane?
No! He's inside yourself.
Some call me Miraculous Mark - diviner of mysteries. Others call me Heeeeeeeeeeeeey..
..Smith.
Some call me Halaaaooooooo - .
[hits drum] that's my surname.
Others know me as Domino.
The Bounty hunter.
Some call me Chilli Chicken Ramen. Others know me as Clive.
I'm sometimes called Peppercorn.. ..by the Dutch.
You can step in at any point here, you know? Don't have to leave me dangling like a tit in a breeze.
Go on, do one more.
Some call me Cillit Bang.
I go by many names!
But you may call me Rudy.
You are searching for something here in the forest, are you not little girl?
Yeah, how do you know?
-I know all things. -Are you a witch?
Yes, I am.
Take a seat. I shall explain to you a thing or two about the forest.
There's no seats in the forest.
Do not be afraid. I control the very forest itself. Behold!
Khalamaloooooo, khalamalamaloooooo, khalamala-bring-a-chair, khalamalooooooh...
Hm, the forest is a cheeky one tonight.
The forest is a cunt tonight.
Soo... Look, you're on mushrooms.
Hey, where are thou from?
You're looking pretty high yourself.
I'm off my tits on dental cream.
I don't know where I am.
I appear to be in a psychedelic episode of Parkinson.
So you've got a new book coming out, um... No, tell me about it. It's about gardening, yeah?
Never mind that Parky, what's happened to your hair?
I slept funny.
You are searching for something here in the Forest of Doom, are you not? What is it you seek?
Basically I'm looking for the Ruby of Kukundu.
The Ruby of Kukundu?
Yeah, the Ruby of Kukundu.
The Ruby of Kukundu?
No! Okay, it was fun, but now it's over.
Yes I know the whereabouts of the Ruby of Kukundu, yay I know the whereabouts of the Ruby of Kuku.., yes I know.
But I cannot just divulge the informations to whereabouts of the Ruby like this.
I need to know that you're a kind of heart and worthy of the information.
You must prove this to me by passing a test.
Cool, what test?
The cycling proficiency test.
Know ye of this test?
Yeah, I passed that ages ago, when I was at school. It was easy.
Ain't you something!
Ain't you a little piece of something else.
Ain't you a little stinking piece of something.
Well then, if thou art such a cockian, perhaps another test is in order for thou.
-Yeah? -Perhaps thou would be less cocky when faced..
..with the Black Rider!
The most dangerous gun-fighter in the forest, who you must fight - tonight at midnight!
Yeah, Rudy it's one o'clock.
I'm not spending another eleven hours with you and your speech impediment.
See if I can hurry this along a little bit.
Excuse me.
It's my scat-phone.
Hello, Black Riders.
Hello, um.. I've ordered a Black Rider for midnight, I might need something a little bit earlier.
I just wondered if you had anything in the area.
-Where are you mate? -The Forest of Doom.
-Where mate? -Brixton.
Alright, he should be with you in a few moments.
-Okay, thanks, um.. I just wondered.. how much was that going to be? - It's gonna be about twelve, thirteen quid mate.
-Ouch.. Okay thanks a lot, you've been very kind, thank you. -Fuck off.
Prepare thyself! The Black Rider approaches.
You have passed the test! And now it is time for you to recieve the Ruby of Kukundu.
Take the Ruby and do with it what you will, pretty prince-girl.
Yeah, Rudy - this is a Kinderegg.
Kinderegg? What is Kinderegg?
It's kind of a chocolatey treat with a toy inside.
Oh.. I'm sorry I thought it was a Ruby, I can only apologize and wish you luck with your quest.
Shut your mouth.
Or I shall fly at you like a bag of cocks!
And you'll receive him like a satchel of vaginas!
Tag team put downs.
What is a Kinderegg?
It's basically - it's like a chocolatey treat, but you get like a toy inside, yeah?
So they are amazing, sometimes you get to build like a hovercraft, yeah?
A hover - what is a hovercraft?
I haven't got time to explain, other times you get like a porcelain alligator playing golf - that's not quite as good, but they're pretty spot on.
-Hm.. sounds intriguing. -Yeah, you might as well have that, if you've never had one.
-For me? -Yeah! Take it.
Thank you.
No worries, take care Rudy, thanks for your help, bye.
Wait!
You have passed the test.
-What test? -The Kinder-test.
Most men would have eaten the Kinderegg.
-Wolf it down quick as a bee. -Yeah?
But you - knowing I had never tasted its chocolatey fruit - offered it to me.
Because you are kind of heart.
Thus I can tell you the whereabouts of the Ruby of Kukundu.
It is far far away my friend...
Fa.. this way - far away - in the Arctic tundra.
You're in the wrong place sunny Jim lad.
Excellent I.. that's brilliant - I'll go there right now. Thanks Rudy, I don't know what to say, you've been brilliant!
Don't say anything, simply caress my balls.
I'm not doin' that.
You have passed the test!
-What test? -The ball-test.
The ball-test?!
-Yes, most men would have caressed my balls.. -Seeya..
Bye bye.
Sorry. Oh I did a burp.
When the Moon burps, Jupiter looks on disgusted.
I like Jupiter and I like Mars, but Pluto - he don't talk to me.
He pretends I'm not there. Hello Pluto..?
Nothing, just carries on with what he's doing.
I don't know why he don't like me..
Saturn is crazy, he's fuckin' crazy.
He drinks all the time, he comes in he's all pissed.
And he's a good cook, but he's too drunk, he sets fire to his fish fingers.
One time I went out with him and he was funny.
This dog's not doing as much work as this one.
What are you doin'?
This must be Howard's tent. He's left me a little note. Let's have a look.
-I, Howard Moon.. -I haven't opened it yet!
..have decided to head to North in my quest to find the Ruby of Kukundu..
-There's nothing on this. -If you find this note, then heed my advice.
The Artcic is a dangerous place, there are strange creatures here. I have heard their calls in the night.
So be on your guard and what ever you do, never fall asleep.
Aaah fuck!
I thought we were getting on quite well, what about a phone number?
Do some work.
Pretty fuckin' good our sound man!
Better not fall asleep this time.
I'll come on again.
Vince? Vince? Vince!
Oh, Yetti, I knew you'd return. Oh sorry I thought you were someone else.
Hey Howard, howyerdoin'? Are you llright?
-Yeah, I'm good, thanks. -Yeah? Come on, let's get out of here.
-No, I'm not leaving this place. -Hm..?
-I'll never leave this place Vince. -What do you mean?
I'm on a mission, I shall never leave this place until I have found the Ruby of Kukundu.
Never would I leave this sacred place until I have found that Ruby!
-Yeah - is that it?
Yep.
-Shall we go then? -Yeah, alright.
Okay.
And so Vince Noir - he went to Topshop and uh.. Howard he took the Ruby and he gave it to Bollo.
I think that's what was happening I don't know, I weren't watching. I was havin' a wank.
And now it is time - shut up - to bring a shaman back to life.
Not so fast, monkeyman! Hand over that Ruby, boy, looks like it could be worth a few euros to me.
-No. For I need it to bring little Naboo back to life. -Oh really?
-Yeah. -Oh really?
-Yeah! -That's what you're gonna do, is it?
Yeah! Huh...
Nooo...
Nooo - nooooo.... aaaaaa.....
Look Peter! Look at my acting Peter! Look at I can do Peter, look!
Nooo... no.. now!
Fuck!
Peter, did I get the part Peter?
Of course you fuckin' didn't get the part, mate. It's already been and gone at the cinema ain't it?!
-What?! -It's on DVD you berk!
Yeah!
Yeah, right in the face!
No open coffin for Bollo!
Aaaa you've killed my friend and former lover!
If that ain't the geezer who likes to spit in other people's faces!
Ooh, oooh, oooh m'nuts!
Bye everybody, oh uh Bollo, oh Bollo. Bollo, Bollo, Bollo..
What is the matter with you?!
I told you it was a summer fling!
I'm deeaad, I'm deeaad, I'm deeaad...
I wish you were, pal.
Well there you have it Brixton! That's the end of the show, everyone's fuckin' dead!
Naboo - the so-called enigma - dead as a doormat.
Yeah, whatever. Bollo - the fuckin' hammy ape - dead also.
The geezer in the light blue outfit - I don't even know his fuckin' name, the septic tank - he's dead as well!
Alright that's it, everyone's dead - I know what you're thinking Brixton.
I know what you're thinkin' I know how you fuckers think, you're thinking where's the geezer who likes jazz,
where's the geezer with the moustache, he'll save the day.
Yeah? Well will he really?
I saw him backstage farting about with a trumpet sock.
A trumpet sock, you idiot? So I cut his fuckin' head off.
I know what else you're thinking, where's the geezer who looks like a bird, he'll save the day.
The one who dresses like a lady! No he won't! He's here. I found him in Topshop.
I found him in Topshop with six items in a cubical! Six items? You're only allowed four, you slag!
What do you think are the fuckin' sign's for?
So I chopped his head off and I fucked his stump!
That's right ladys and gentlemen, I'm a stump-fucker!
Welcome to the concept of stump-fucking!
The double-stump-fuck.
If there are any little'uns in tonight..
..I just wanna say it's S T U M P ! Stump-fuckin'!
Get it right when you tell your mates in the playground tomorrow!
Stump-fucking - a concept we couldn't quite get past BBC3.
We wanted to call our show The Mighty Stump-fuckers!
And they said: 'If you do that, you'll have to go on a little bit later.'
And we said: 'Is that physically fuckin' possible?'
We'll go on when we always go on! After two pints of fuckin' lager and packet of crisps!
That's the end of the show!
-Now all fuck off!! -Not so fast! -What?
-Yes! -Christ!
Ooh check me out!
I've got you surrounded, sir!
Jesus! It's like Woodstock meets Tour de France!
-Who are you? -I go by many names.
Yeah, I heard all this shit backstage, move it along, would you, pal?
Hush your lips.
Or I shall slice them off.
Place them upon your mother.. ..and kiss her.
Oh yes, squire, what with?
With cold steel!
Well maybe I'll tear your nose off at the root and flick it up the vicars anus!
With cold steel, mind?
I'm fuckin' warning you Flipper!
On guard.
Crikey! Ooh, I tore all the skin under my armpit! Oooh help me boy, help me!
-We'll have to call the whole fight off. -Are you okay?
Ooh I've done something wrong..
-Can I help you? -I'm bleeding inside, help me boy - help me.
You fight well.
For a Jimmy Savile impersonater.
Shut up or I'll fix it for you. And you, and you, and you!
You fight well yourself mate, for a geezer in a purple dress.
This is not a dress.
This is the sacred robe of the psychedelic monks. So I think the joke's on you.
Well it goes nicely with your little bicycle.
Oh really?
Now then, now then!
I think you'll find Jimmy can still move when he needs to.
-You can never win, you know? -Oh yeah, pal, why is that?
Because I taught you everything you know.
You might taught me everything I know, but you didn't teach me everything you know.
-You know.. I know.. oh fuck! -What does that mean?
Ooh take that you slag! Take that you nonce!
-Oooh Jesus! Oooh crikey! - Get off! No! Leave me alone!
-You're too strong for me! -Oh yeah, oh that's bad!
No! You're spoiling the illusion!
Take that!
How do we do it?
The magic of theatre.
-Let's end this, one way or the other, you slag. -Bring it on, Terry Nutkins.
Oooh Crikey oooh ooh look at me, me go faster stripe's come loose.
I'm only an old man, luckily I've still got one trick left up my Lambeth sleeve.
Cock punchin'!
Oooh my fiery biscuit!
When in doubt, ladies and gentlemen, release the middle digit!
The cockney cock-puncher! He punches one way, he punches the other,
he punches diagonal, he's like connect four in cock-punchin' terms.
Yeah, there's no one that can save you now Leo Sayer!
What? No! Christ! No! Oooh fuck! No!
Big leg! Here comes Big leg! He's got a big fuckin' leg! Big leg!
Thank you Big leg!
And now all it is left to do is bring the tiny shaman back to life.
Let the magic commence.
I'm alive!
So with the power of the Ruby brought Naboo back to life.
Restoring his powers.
He flew high into the night sky like a tiny blue Snoop dog.
Look at him move, look at him move, look at his mother-lovin' shaman grooves.
And what of Fossil and Bollo? He restored them back to life!
-Yeah! I'm alive! -The power of Ruby! Knew no bounds.
What about Vince and Howard? Are they dead forever? Of course they weren't!
Thank you Brixton! Good night!
Thank you!
Thank you Brixton, thank you!
Thanks a lot!
-Thank you! -Thank you Brixton!
-Top shelf! -Brixton rocks!
Oooh right in the eye!
-Hey, Vince.. -Brixton!
Oh yeah yeah yeah, cool. Hey, Bobby Bob Bob.
Three three three. Don't tell him, don't tell him, I can only get three...
-Where's Vince going? -Oh yeah, um.. Vince..
-Where's he going? -To organise the after show party.
It's at this really cool club called Stumpy McFuckies. Yeah!
That sounds good, let's go. It sounds like fun fun fun.
-Fun fun fun. -Hey there's one thing uh..
There's only room for three on the guestlist..
One, two, three.
See ya around.
Hey listen, maybe I'll see you like.. never!
Howard Moon alone again..
Not that lonely.
Because you're never quite alone.
Not when old mister Moon's shining doon.
Actually uhm.. sorry Howard, I don't think I can hang out with you.
Why?
Well.. to be honest - you're a ball bag.
I'm the Moon - I don't hang out with ball bags.
-Okay, um... do you want me to..? -Do you wanna sign for this?
-Yeah, do you have a pen? -I don't have a pen, no.
Right, don't worry about that.
-That's very good. I like that. -So, okay well.. I don't know what you're doing later, but um...
You mean I'm.. I'm sort of free later on, my diary's freed up somewhat this evening so..
If you.. I don't think.. We've had some bad dealings in the past, but if you want to sort of go for a meal and to resolve some difficulties..
-I could.. -A meal? With you?
-With Howard Moon? -Oh yeah, why not?
You know, something I once saw a man like you in Burma, I saw him hang, I helped him hang.
I can do the same for you.
-So is that a NO then? -That's a big NO, my friend.
But uh... If you're free about half past ten make sure you wear the red pants, n'est ce pas? Adios!
Thanking you, good night!
Oh well..
A delivery for me, maybe there's someone, who loves me after all.
I'm Old Gregg motherfuckeeer! I'm Old Gregg.
Yeah, yeah I'm Old Gregg.
Hey Brixton! I'm Old Gregg!
Ooh.. I'm drunk on Baileys.
I had a shoe full of Baileys and I'm drunk as a bitch.
I've got a mangina.
Yeah yeah, when I get it out, light comes from in it, makes you feel tingly.
I'm Old Gregg!
-Hey Howard. -Oh shit..
Hey Gregg, how the hell are you?
Good to see you, um.. how did you find me, Gregg?
Ooh oh I saw your poster, I saw your tiny little Patrick Swayze eyes.
You've got those crazy Swayze eyes, and I knew I had to come and find ya,
so I was gon... trying to do a surprise, for the DVD I tried to make,
I came in a, presented myself to ya in a cube.
-I'm Old Gregg! -Yeah..
Yes, we're all aware of your name.
-Uhm.. you've told me about eighty-thousand times look Gregg.. -Do you love me?
Greggory.. Greggory we had a time...
-Well it was more of a rape, but it was a.. it took place.. -We had a time.
-We had a time.. -We had a time.
The time finished, then we went out separate ways.
Now you've gone your way, I've gone my way and that's the way it's gonna be, Gregg.
What do you mean?
-What I mean to say is.. -You love Greggory?
No, no Gregg, that's what I'm saying - it's over between us, over.
-You must love Greggory! -I don't love Greggory.
You must love me exactly as I love you, Howard.
Cos if your eyes don't love my eyes, I'm gonna suck'em out with a powerful hoover.
And tuck'em up my downstairs mix-up.
Yeah...
-Maybe I was being a bit hasty there, Gregg. I.. you know, cos.. -Hasty?
Yeah, you know, sometimes when you do love someone, you pretend not to,
it's kind of way of not being too eager, you know I didn't wanna.. I was playing a game with you, Gregg.
Playing a game?
-Playing game with Old Greggory? -Yeah, that's right.
Playin' motherfuckin' love game?
Yeah, come on!
~ Do you love me? Are you playing your love games with me? ~
~ I just wanna know what to do 'cause I need your love a lot. ~
~ Come on! Do you love me? Are you playing your love games with me? ~
~ I just wanna know what to do 'cause I need your love a lot. Come on now! ~
~ Moving too fast, this isn't a race, ooh. Baby back off and lower the pace now, ~
~ Slow it down, and give me some space, mmmh. Moving too fast, this isn't a race, ah ah! ~
~ Do you love me? Are you playing your love games with me? ~
~ I just wanna know what to do 'cause I need your love a lot. Come on! ~
~ Moving too fast this isn't a race, mmm. Baby back off and lower the pace now. ~
~ Slow it down, and give me some space. Moving too fast this isn't a race, no no! ~
~ -I'm Old Gregg! -I know I think you said. ~
~ Come on don't make me beg now, 'cause I'm not your regular guy. ~
~ Don't be shy! Do you love me? ~
~ Do you love me? ~
Greggorys! Come down here!
~ Do you love me? ~
Come on Brixton, get on your motherfuckin' feet.. Three, four!
~ Do you love me? ~
-Yeah, yeah. -Brixton!
Thank you!
Brixton, I've got one last surprise for you.
I did a stencil in my knickers. And now I'm gonna unleash my mangina!
-We love you Brixton! -Check it out!
-Good night! -Brixton!
My mangina.
I've finally got my hands into Howard Moon.
Yeah, yeah - Howard got a surprise for me, I don't know what it is.
It might be a shenis, yeah!
Come on you cheeky vixen, get in my wheelbarrow!
Don't mind if I do!
He's gotta mangina and I've got a shenis.
Let's make sweet love!